Act VI: Renaissance, Chapter VIII: Alienated

Dear diary,

today is a good day so far and im really excited more than everrrrr! Eight grade graduation is today and mom dad and Lyle are gonna be there cheering for me as i walk with my nest friends. We're gonna go to the ice cream shop and weve planned to watch movies, one of the scary ones too. never seen a scary movie in a theaters before so of course im nervous. Anyways im so happy, this is the day that will put me on the way to high school.

Love, Liena J.

Dear Diary,

Eeeeeek! First day of summer! After this comes high school and im so not ready, but ive been told by Shelleys older sister that there are school castes that make high school a different experience than middle school. I dont know what a caste is but i think ill know it when i see it. Anyways, me and my girls went out to the ice rink in town with James Young and some of his friends. Omg i love James Young, i want to have his babies. Perfect blue eyes and blond hair and-

He is sooooo dreamy, capiche? This night was one great night! Sleeping now.

Xoxo, Liena J.

Dear diary,

I've started out and i found out that the halls are arranged by alphabet. A wing. B wing. C wing. You name it. Its weird but its smart of the facalltee or facaltie. I have periods, seven- and thats not including the period I have. I hate being a girl, I have to wear tampons and try training bras. Omg bras are painful, i wish i could make my boobies just stay up the way they do when im laying down in my bed. But wishes r horses. Id be so embarrassed if my little brother found this diary and red this entry. Omg i cant with him. Hes a dork.

So anyways, high school seems pretty straightforward but its only day #1. Only 179 more days to go. I hope i don't get bullied

Love, Liena J.

Dear diary,

Its my fifteenth birthday!

Love, Liena J.

Deary diar

...so um... Ive lost my virginidy to Edwin Forrester... And I was bleeding and i was crying and it hurt... I dont know who to tell and im scared because mom n dad told me never to lay down with a boy until i was eighteen or older and... Oh god, it hurt down there when he put his weenie in me. I dont know who to tell but i can still feel a warm liquid suddenly fill me in deep, and there was this white goo that trickled right before i bled.

Im scared and i dont know what to do or who to go to. Mom and dad will be angry with me and i dont want to disapoint them...

still havent told them

still havent told anyone

im losing my mind, i cant keep this locked up... I can still feel the weenie wiggling in my vagina. God help me.

Dear diary

Im back after spending Christmas with the cousins. It was fun. Daddy got silly drunk and Lyle was playing legos with the younger ones. We sang and we laughed and everyone was passing that yucky fruitcake with coke. Personally i dont like that cake but i had to suck it up to please aunt Jenna. I dont like aunt Jenna, shes obnoxious and loud like nobodys busines. I had to carry lyle to the car, he exhausted himself before it was ten. I just know he'll be excited to see what his presents are. Car trip was slow and smooth cause mom drove and daddy was all funny, slurring his words. I love my family.

Loving regards, Liena J.

I have these dreams about a girl of white hair. She wears orange and blue and she keeps telling me about the blonde woman with silver eyes who comes for me. But its just a dream

Dear diary

Havent written in you for awhile, everything is still the same but im now in softmore year. I know its not spelled that way but thats how i hear it. Things r okay for now but... Im getting older and this diary... Isnt as juicy as made it be. Im sorry, diary. I love you but our time comes to an end. Im getting older, so...

Im putting you until i need to pull you out. Goodbye for now.

dear diary

Lyle hasnt come home. What could a thirteen year old be doing now? I never understood how boys worked and i might never will but we tried to call his phone. It was night when mom thought to call the police and idk i had the faint feeling that something was so terribly wrong. Dad said not to worry, lyle must be out playing with his friends over at ones house. I didn't think nothing of it nut i wanted to write this down tonight. Hopefully he comes home in the morning or something

lyle still hasnt come home and today marks two full days... Im getting worried now, but mom and dad dont seem like it yet. Cops cannot open the missing persons case just yet weve been told. Im sure its nothing, im sure hes fine. Hes my brother. He has a life ahead of him.

day three of him not showing up... Lyle, please come home. This isnt like you.

four days and mom said not to worry. I would not have but i heard her crying behind the locked door of her bedroom and there i began to make a hypothe... An idea that maybe Lyle wasnt coming back. It scared me because I've seen kidnappers on the news. Children got stolen and there were reports that this month the highest number of people have gone missing was fifty when it was ten on average. I thought of that spooky clown from that movie. Im really worried for him, it really isnt like him to just disappear.

diary,

five days and nothing. I cant be alone without thinking of him. His room is empty and mom wanders in often. Its been cleaned but theres that sense of dreading emptiness i can feel creeping up on her, on me, on all of us. We keep trying to call him but the thing goes to voicemail, we know what that means. And just like yesterday, ive begun to cry myself to sleep... goodnight dia

today ive just graduated and it feels weird. I have to think about my future and college. I didnt make do enough for university but im settling for community college and that's okay, and mom and dad say so as long as i further my education. Im happy to keep going but itll be hard and... Even harder when my brother isnt here to comfort me and assure me its gonna be fine. He was a sweet little brat and we miss him greatly. Its been awhile since hes disappeared but we try not to think about him anymore. We just hope hes in a better place with gran-gran and chappy pops. I only do wish that id have said something that day. I didnt kno, how could ive? Lyle had gone out that day with a smile on his face. He was happy to go out and

I write to leave you behind. You will be placed in this closet so that the new homeowners will find and read you. Someone has to know of this, i think. Someone has to see why we left here. It was just too painful for us to look into that lonely room. Were moving to a house east of here. Its got only two bedrooms, not three. Oh and its a one level house too. Small but not cramped as ive seen it.

Alright... I guess i should tear out the embarrassing entries and leave these last few ones for show. With that in mind, i bid this diary farewell

Lyle closed the diary and fell onto it, weeping heavily into the last entry. Gloom, looking at the entries over his shoulder, had put her hand on his back and rubbed gracefully. "I'm sorry, Lyle. I really am sorry."

Lyle let his tears soak onto the entry as he let his emotions run rampant. He bawled like he never did before. He wanted to know this, but it was too much. If only he didn't peek into Liena's old closet. He shouldn't have, yet he did. And know he knew more. "She- She moved on-" his high-pitched voice let fly.

"Because she doesn't know-" Gloom wrapped her hands around him. "She doesn't know, Lyle! You're alive and they'll be happy!"

Lyle hugged her back tightly, putting his face into her chest to wipe away his tears. To hide. To- Gloom moved her hand onto the back of his head. "It's okay, Lyle..." she whispered into his ear. "Let it out. You're okay, you're okay."

And for a second, Gloom had thought of Lincoln again. You're okay...

She worked to comfort Lyle, to be there for him, as long as he needed her to be there, however long that would be. However long the road would take them.