Author Notes - So, uh, this is the longest chapter thus far. To be fair to me, a lot happens in it.

You know what I never got? I never understood why season one established a really awesome location in the form of Rock Bottom, and then the next nine seasons proceeded to totally forget about it. Like, you'd be lucky if it was even mentioned. Sure, it appeared a lot in spin-off material, but it was basically nothing in the real series. Even now, it's only appeared in two more episodes to my knowledge: 'Out of the Picture' and 'Food PBFFT! Truck'.

Still, when I watched 'Out of the Picture' for the first time, I could barely handle seeing it again after SEVENTEEN FREAKING YEARS.

CHAPTER SIX - HITTING ROCK (PBFFT) BOTTOM

Zee fight with Sandy Grease may have left our heroes more confused zen zey were to begin with. But zey do not have time to figure it out. Zey have been caught in a nasty trap, and zee true villain of zis story is sending zem into a trench full of disturbing wildlife, advanced darkness, and nifty souvenirs.

If watching her husband's plans fail - on top of Sandy Grease's destruction - had taught Karen anything, it was that the porous fool and his band of misfits were the only thing stopping her plan from working. To her logical 'mind', it made no sense that the sponge of all people could stop her. He was just a fry cook, a simple sponge, and a pretty idiotic one at that. Still, she knew he would ruin her carefully created plan if she allowed him too.

On one of the several screens in front of her, she could see the bus with our heroes on board. The sight of it following the track she wanted brought a grin to her digitised face. Still, she knew it served a mere temporary solution.

'Planktron!' She called, yelling even though Planktron was right there.

'Yes, my computer boss?' He asked.

'SpongeBob and his friends are currently out of the picture. How's SteelBot coming along?'

Planktron left reality for a moment to calculate. 'Secret Project SteelBot is approximately 53.7% complete. Minor bubble mishap resulted in a slight delay. Would be 64.8% done otherwise.'

'Minor bubble mishap?' She repeated, with an electronic eyebrow raised.

'Believe me, you do not want to know.'

Karen grunted, and turned her attention to the other screens. If they were anything to go by, her plan was working perfectly. So far.

'What about those repairs on Sandy Grease?' She asked.

'Sandy Grease repairs are going far easier. However, her Snag-and-Trap will take a while to reach maximum functionality.'

The computer groaned. 'Great. Of course. Forgetting that sponge's odd capabilities will be the death of me if I'm not careful. I have planned too much for it to all vanish into flames!'

Karen tapped her fingers against the table. She did do one thing right over her microscopic husband - she actually thought things through. Plenty of backup plans awaited our heroes if she failed to take care of them properly.

Planktron focused on the idiots on the bus. 'Can I suggest killing them?'

'Tempting, but no.' Karen replied. 'SpongeBob is just annoyingly sweet enough to keep alive. The others though? I'll let my robots take care of it for now.'

'What about Plankton? As in, organic Plankton?'

Karen took a moment for her processors to come up with a good enough answer. They were much slower than usual, and she didn't quite understand why.

'We'll keep him alive and well for now.' She finally answered. 'After all, none of this would've been possible without him. Let him see my victory. Not to mention that I may require him again later.'

The copepod in question was still standing outside the Chum Bucket walls, now pacing around as though that would help him come up with a super clever plan.

'If you don't mind me asking, computer boss, why did you need him in the first place?' Planktron asked. 'It appears you could do this by yourself.'

She sighed. 'Even if he can't succeed in any evil plan, he is usually a talented inventor. That is something I can't say about me. If I tried creating a DuplicatorTron of my own, it would end up making ice cream. Turns out that being a computer doesn't make one an expert in inventing.'

It annoyed her that she had to admit that to anyone, including herself, but she saw it as nothing to get too mad over. After all, the fact that she had almost none of her husband's inventing know-how was just that; a fact. A computer made to emulate life as well as her had to have faults somewhere. If she knew how, she'd get those faults fixed up right away.

'There would be no need for that.' Planktron pointed out. 'Plankton had - inexplicably - programmed me to have his skills in inventing. In fact, mine likely outrank his.'

'Yes. I know.' Karen replied in a low tone, before returning to the screens again.

Planktron's processors took a little while to understand her. Karen could comprehend something a little illogical at least, but the other robots could not.

'Since you do not need Plankton for his inventing skills,' He said. 'There is no logical reason to keep him alive. Thus, I can only assume that you are keeping him alive due to some sort of emotional attachment you have towards him.'

'HA! Are you serious?' She said as she spun around to look at him. 'There's not a single part of my operating system that contains any emotional attachment towards that copepod.'

Planktron took a quick moment to scan her, doing so without moving.

'Incorrect. Your operating system is at least 50% emotional attachment.'

'DON'T YOU HAVE A GIANT ROBOT TO PUT TOGETHER?!'

'It's okay! I'll take control!'

'SpongeBob, y'all are tha only one on this bus who doesn't have a boating licence - even Patrick has one - and ya think you can do anythin'?'

'Here, I'll drive! Anything to make the time I was that moron's boating buddy worth it.'

'I've been with Mrs Puff longer than everyone here combined!'

'How is that a good thing?! And I think she hates you more than I do somehow!'

'Boys, would y'all stop fightin'? Runaway bus with no steerin' wheel, remember?'

'Hey look, a cliff!'

If you were lost in that mess of dialogue, I can't help you. Needless to say, our heroes weren't any better off than they were in the last chapter. Then again, what can one do when a steering-less bus is headed towards Rock Bottom?

'You're not helping, Patrick!' SpongeBob yelled.

'No really, there's a cliff.'

SpongeBob looked out the windshield, to see that his best friend was correct. There was indeed a cliff. The very edge of it, in fact! To make it worse, the bus only seemed to be getting faster and faster.

'WAAAH! Rock Bottom is right there!' He cried.

Sandy gritted her teeth. 'At the speed we're goin' at, we have no chance at stoppin' this bus. We'll be headin' right over tha cliff!'

Squidward tapped her shoulder, with his four legs spread all over the place in an attempt to anchor himself down.

'What?' She said.

'So, should I just jump out the window now?' He asked.

'Unless y'all can think up a plan to stop tha bus, you ain't jumpin' outta anythin'! And anyway, if ya hit tha ground at this speed, you'll be splattered against tha ground.'

While she left Squiddy cringing in pain and disgust, Sandy causally paced around to get a plan brewing in her mind.

'Wait, I got somethin'!' She said. 'How 'bout we-?'

And with that, the bus drove off the edge. Instead of going straight down the ninety-degree road, it obeyed physics for once and flew into the air. It didn't take long at all for its angle of trajectory to point downwards and for it to start hurtling towards the ground. Sandy stuck her head out of one of the windows, to see that she and her friends were plummeting into a dark void with no bottom she could see.

'Hoo boy...'

She couldn't look for long, as gravity played around. The sheer momentum of the bus falling dragged them slowly up into the ceiling and towards the back.

'I KNEW I never should've joined you!' Squidward yelled, kicking his legs about. 'Now we're all going to die in a horrible bus explosion!'

'Not necessarily!' Sandy said, trying to convince herself more than him. 'We gotta minute or two before we actually hit tha ground. Think of somethin' everyone!'

'I know!' Squidward said. 'We'll use Patrick to soften our landing.'

Patrick pouted. 'I don't like this plan.'

The three of them began fighting, because apparently they wanted their final words to be bitter bickering. SpongeBob zoned out their arguments, not because his brain had shut down but quite the opposite actually. He knew he had to think fast; his friends depended on him.

'Ah-ha!' He said as it came to him.

He floated towards a window, wrapped his leg around one of the seats for support, and crawled outside. Gravity was forcing him to stick to the bus like a barnacle, and the slightest shock would send him flying into the air. Not exactly his preferred outcome. He kept pushing himself as quickly as he could until he reached the top of the bus; it gave him a glorious view of his impending demise.

'Gotta do this right…' He told himself. 'Gotta do this right!'

With little time to spare, he wrapped his arms and legs around the bus until he was strapped on tight. Closing his eyes shut, he launched his body into the air and hoped for the best. Sandy stopped panicking pretty quickly, even though Patrick and Squidward were still convinced they were plummeting.

The bus had slowed down considerably. It was still falling to be sure, and definitely a little faster than preferable, but now it was at 'rough landing' speed and not 'gonna to freaking die' speed. When Sandy looked out the window again, she saw a big yellow parachute lowering the bus down.

She smiled. 'Good thinkin', SpongeBob!'

'Yeah!' SpongeBob said, sounding a little out of breath. 'The only problem is that… I'm a parachute full of holes! So, uh, the landing isn't going to be soft!'

Sandy nodded, and turned to the other half of her team. 'Boys! I'm gonna need y'all to hold on tight!'

'On it!' Patrick yelled, saluting her.

He then proceeded to hold tightly onto Squidward, who could only growl and groan in frustration. Sandy just shrugged; not what she was thinking, but it certainly still worked. She hung onto one of the poles as the bus fell to the ground, waiting for impact.

*CRAAASH*

And there it was. SpongeBob managed to slow it down enough so it didn't completely destroy the bus or kill those inside of it. Our heroes only experienced a slight shock. Sandy did fall to the front of the bus, but it didn't hurt all that much. As they soon found out, however, the bus had certainly seen better days. It had been dented quite thoroughly on impact; no way they could use it to drive home now.

'It's alright, boys!' Sandy said. 'SpongeBob has landed tha bus! … Never thought I would hafta say that.'

SpongeBob returned to his regular shape and stood by the bus's door as his friends stepped out. It took another few seconds for Patrick to realise that the danger had passed, so he finally let go of Squidward.

'Well, unfortunately,' Squidward said, dusting himself off. 'I survive to see another day with you idiots on the horizon. So, where are we, and how do we get outta here?'

Our heroes took a quick look around. 'Gloomy' didn't even begin to describe a place such as this. No doubt they had reached the Hadalpelagic Zone; despite it being in the middle of the day, practically no sunshine at all reached this dark and dismal trench. Only bioluminescent plants provided any light at all, cloaking everything in pinks and cyans. Even the soil seemed to be a dark blue, compared to the pale yellows and pinks above.

Even worse? They weren't even at the deepest levels. If SpongeBob dared to peep over the edge - which he only did for a moment - he couldn't see the bottom of this seemingly bottomless pit. At least the stone 'platforms' there were standing on were sturdy.

'What is this place?' Sandy asked, wincing. 'It's more gloomy than a weepin' willow at a funeral.'

'It seems oddly familiar…' Patrick said, rubbing his chin.

'Oh, I've been here before.' Squidward remarked. 'Twice actually. Was never too keen on it.'

'G-Guys…' SpongeBob said, gulping. 'I-I think we ended up… in Rock Bottom.'

He looked around, trying to find anything familiar. In the few times he had been to this place, he had mostly stuck around the buz station and kandy (not a misspelling) machine. Those landmarks weren't anywhere to be found, however.

'We're lost.' Squidward said. 'Aren't we?'

'No!' SpongeBob said with a smile. 'We just have to look for landmarks, right Sandy?'

'So ya were payin' attention!' Sandy said. 'But, uh, what landmarks? All I can see is pitch blackness.'

SpongeBob frowned hard enough for the corners to droop off his head. 'Oh no. Darkness… We're not just in the Trench of Darkness. We're in… the Trench of Advanced Darkness.'

'OH NO!' Patrick cried. 'NOT ADVANCED DARKNESS!'

'In other words,' SpongeBob said. 'Yeah, we're lost.'

The disappointed - and slightly frightened - groans from his friends convinced him to keep looking around, however. There were still hundreds of robots out there, and after Sandy Grease he couldn't be certain which friend would be next. It could even be him. Then how would he help anyone? His look around came to a stop when he saw a familiar red light in the distance.

'HEY - PBFFT - SpongeBob!' An equally-familiar voice called. 'Is that - PBFFT - you?'

'SpongeBob…' Sandy said. 'Do I wanna know why a mysterious voice is callin' yer name?'

SpongeBob smiled like a madman. 'I know that voice! Don't worry, Sandy. He's a friend of mine!'

Squidward groaned. 'Oh, I remember that voice. I associate it with horrifying attempts at selling Krabby Patties.'

The reddish light approached them, and SpongeBob was the only one who wasn't unnerved by its presence. It didn't take long, however, before the light's owner revealed himself: a red angler fish, and a rather friendly looking one at that.

'What's - PBFFT - up, Sponge - PBFFT - Bob?' He asked.

'Good ta - PBFFT - see ya, my old - PBFFT - friend!' SpongeBob said, shaking his fin.

'Of course SpongeBob is friends with this weirdo…' Squidward muttered.

'A friend of SpongeBob's is a friend of… SpongeBob's!' Patrick said; he was a little confused but he had the spirit.

'Uh, SpongeBob,' Sandy said, approaching the two friends. 'Mind tellin' me why you're blowin' raspberries so much?'

'Oh, sorry.' SpongeBob said. 'I should've explained. See, here in Rock Bottom, they find it really hard to understand us Epipelagic folks unless we copy their accent. It may be weird to you, but it's just how these guys live.'

The angler fish nodded. 'You guys are lucky, though. Most people in this town aren't unable to stop it very easily, cos they don't really have to. But I've spent some time in the Epipelagic Zone myself, so I can understand and talk to you guys without that accent.'

While Squidward breathed a sigh of relief, Sandy walked to the angler fish and circled around him. He wasn't so disturbed by it, but was rather confused.

'What are you doing?' He asked.

'I don't understand…' Sandy said. 'You're apparently a guy, but you have the lights of a female angler fish.' She received an annoyed look.

'Sandy!' SpongeBob yelled, making her flinch. 'While it is true that most angler fish with lights are ladies, not all of them are. I'd expect more respect from someone like you, Sandy.'

The squirrel blushed. 'Aw, sorry. I wasn't thinkin'. I hope I didn't hurt ya too badly.'

The angler fish shrugged. 'Eh, it's fine. Simple mistake. But that isn't important right now. Name's Rebak. Finally got to tell you that. Rock Bottom has recently got itself a bit of a… robot problem.'

SpongeBob's joy upon meeting an old friend again plummeted immediately. His little robot problem had gotten so bad that it had spread to even Rock Bottom, apparently.

'Oooof course it does…' Squidward said. 'Now what?'

'Well, we've been able to deal with it for the most part.' Rebak explained. 'Seems like the locals here are too scary, even for them. They've stolen some artwork from the museum-'

'OH NO!' SpongeBob cried.

'But we're handling it.' He said, much to SpongeBob's relief. 'Right now, I think we oughta focus on getting you guys outta here. Like most people from above, you're not really here by choice, are you?'

'That'll be easy.' Patrick said. 'We've got a bus!'

Before anyone could point out that the bus was a complete wreck by this point, the ground around the vehicle cracked and gave way. Fortunately, our heroes were far away from the edge when it crumbled into the abyss below, taking the wrecked bus with it. It took a long while for a quiet *crash* to be heard, seemingly miles below them.

'Oh.' Patrick said. 'Never mind!'

'Wouldn't do you much good here, anyway.' Rebak said. 'The path back to the surface is a rough one. The only way up the cliff is by bus, and… well, a bus won't work very well against these precarious cliffs.'

'So we're stuck here, is what you're saying.' Squidward said. 'Great.'

'I never said that! If you follow me, I'll lead you back to the Buz Stop. If you follow close behind me, you'll be fine. But if you're not careful, you're - PBFFT!' He emphasised his point by dragging his fin across his neck.

SpongeBob gulped; even with a friend by his side, Rock Bottom was always a frightening place to navigate. But he couldn't forget the hundreds of Bikini Bottomites above who were still being tormented by this robotic crisis, and he knew he wouldn't be able to do a thing about it if he stayed in this dank trench instead.

'Alright!' He said. 'We'll do it.'

'We don't really have any other choice.' Sandy said. 'Unless we wanna sit here and eat soil fer tha rest of our lives.'

'Uh, I wouldn't recommend that.'

'AAAHHHH!' Patrick screamed, as the lump of soil on his tongue began talking to him.

'PUT ME - PBFFT - DOWN, YOU - PBFFT - JERK!'

Sandy sighed; the sooner she got out of this place, the better.

'Come on.' Rebak said. 'The longer you guys stay here, the weirder it will get.'

And so, our heroes trekked on, with only the light from a friendly angler fish to light up their way. SpongeBob leapt over the precarious cliffs with ease, a smile on his face like he wasn't at risk of plummeting to his demise. Patrick did the same, perhaps out of idiocy more so than optimism. Sandy kept her lasso in hand as she jumped across the ravine. Squidward, meanwhile, required constant reassurance to even start moving.

Very soon, Sandy gave up and dragged him along.

'The quickest way back to the buz stop is through the museum.' Rebak said. 'But to get there, we'll have to make it through the Trench of Advanced Darkness. And in order to do that, well…'

He stopped our heroes near the edge of a cliff. For good reason too; in front of them, was a gigantic pit. Sandy may have had a chance to clear it with her lasso, but there was nothing to lasso onto. Meaning, she'd be the only one able to cross it with safety. And even that plan had a complication; in the middle of this big pit was a massive stalactite, right in her way.

'Of course.' Squidward remarked.

'Hey, don't worry!' Rebak said. 'We'll just go the long way.'

'How long is tha long way?' Sandy asked.

The angler fish shrugged. 'I dunno. … Three days?'

'Three days?!' SpongeBob cried. 'We can't wait that long! There's gotta be a way to go this way.'

Patrick pointed into the distance. 'How about we use that?'

He pointed at a big machine not too far away from them. It didn't seem unlike something that Plankton may have built, except it gave off a bright purple-pink light. And was far too sophisticated. It appeared to be a laser cannon, of all things, that hung by itself on a cliff only a few hops away. Okay, maybe it was a pretty big hop.

'Hey, I've got an idea!' SpongeBob said. 'What if we used that laser to cut a platform into that rock?'

'That idea makes absolutely no sense.' Squidward said. 'Let's give it a shot.'

Sandy smirked. 'Lemme handle this. I got it.'

There was no way she would be able to make that jump on her own, but she had an idea that would've got her across it easily. Or possibly killed her, but she liked to live on the edge. She spun her lasso above her head as fast as her arm would manage, and she leapt into the air as high as she could.

'Be careful, Sandy!' SpongeBob yelled, chewing on his nails for a moment.

He had nothing to worry about. Sandy's lasso functioned much like a helicopter, slowing her descent significantly as she practically floated over the abyss. SpongeBob wasn't any less petrified for her well-being, even though Patrick had no idea what was going on and Squidward just wanted her to finish already. All his fears were unfounded, for Sandy landed on the other side without a problem.

She breathed a sigh of relief. 'Hoo-wee… that was close. Ma arm was gettin' tired.'

A couple of pebbles were dislodged upon her landing, and they plummeted into the dark void below. She couldn't even hear them hitting the ground. Heck, she wasn't sure if they hit the ground at all. If it wasn't a totally unscientific thing to believe, she may have thought the pit was bottomless. She tried to ignore that thought, and made her way over to the laser cannon.

'This may take me a while!' She said. 'I don't know how it works!'

'YOU GOT THIS!' SpongeBob said. 'You're the best!'

His little compliment certainly gave her a self-confidence boost. The first thing she had to do was find this machine's on-switch. She couldn't be certain, but she was sure the switch was the big red button larger than her face that had a picture of a hand on it.

'That ain't obvious at all.'

She delivered a karate chop to the button, and the machine turned on instantly. Its purple-pink glow intensified, and it pointed up slightly without Sandy having to press even one more button. Immediately, it charged up and fired a laser right at the massive stalactite.

And cut right through it!

'Wait!' Sandy yelled. 'I didn't-!'

The laser machine shut off as soon it was done cutting through the rock. The stalactite - their only way of getting across - snapped off and fell deep into the void… until it fell about five feet, colliding with the bottom of the pit and staying firmly in the place. Right at the same level as all the other rocks, luckily enough.

'That's convenient!' SpongeBob said.

'Don't say that.' Squidward said. 'It's obnoxious. More than usual.'

'Well, that wasn't what I had in mind.' Sandy said, getting her lasso out again. 'But it works!'

She helicoptered back over to the boys, making it over the pit just as easily as before. With a new platform conveniently provided for them, they continued to leap over the dangerous cliffs with Rebak leading the way.

'What was that laser machine doing there anyway?' Squidward asked, making another leap. 'You guys are weirdos, but you don't strike me as the world-domination type.'

'It was those robots.' Rebak replied. 'They tried building it out here, where they thought no one would be able to stop them from building it. Then Evests ate them.'

'Who's Evests?' Patrick asked.

Right on time, an absolutely gigantic red serpent emerged from the void and jumped above them in a glorious rainbow-like arc. All four of our heroes stood perfectly still as it flew above them, until it landed again in the darkness.

'That's her.' Rebak said.

'W-Wow.' SpongeBob said. 'S-She's kinda big.'

'And so beautiful!' Patrick said, eyes twinkling.

After much climbing through the ultra dark Trench of Advanced Darkness - with a severe lack of robots, likely thanks to Evests - our heroes and their guide eventually came across a big blue building on the edge of the cliff. Now, finally, Rock Bottom was beginning to get a bit more stable. SpongeBob could see Downtown Rock Bottom not too far away.

The only problem was that there was only one way to actually get to Downtown Rock Bottom - through the museum. The back doors were ajar, and a dim red light could be seen leaking out through the small gap. It was a good thing that the door was so easy for them to reach, because it wasn't going to be very easy from here on out.

'Alright, here we are.' Rebak said. 'Normally we'd be in the clear by now. But, uh… not so much now.'

'Oh great.' Squidward said. 'What happened?'

'The dang robots have activated the security system on us.'

'Hang on.' Sandy said. 'I thought ya said that y'all were dealin' with tha robots just fine.'

'Most of those robots. But the robots in here are… a different breed.'

He didn't elaborate on this at all, leading them through the back door despite the ominous warning. Our heroes had to cover their eyes for a moment; the inside of the museum was much brighter than the Trench of Advanced Darkness. Once their eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness change, they all gasped; lasers.

A lot and a lot of lasers. That's the first thing they saw. There was a massive wall of laser beams that blocked off the entire front half of the massive museum, which was a mostly open building with balconies and stairs off to the sides. Lasers also covered the very bottom of the floor, leaving only the slightly higher levels and the raised platform in the middle. Luckily, the balconies along the walls didn't have any lasers blocking them. Except for that big wall in the middle, of course.

The backdoor fortunately led to a balcony on the highest level, so they were well above the trouble.

'Woah!' SpongeBob said. 'That's a lotta-!'

Rebak slammed his fin over SpongeBob's mouth immediately, cringing.

'SHHHH!' He shushed, pointing down to the ground floor. 'You don't want to wake up them.'

The angler fish pointed to a whole bunch of robots. All the same type, and one none of our heroes had encountered until now. They were tall, even taller than Squidward, with big blocky bodies. Their heads had a light of sorts, emitting a dome-shaped white light that enveloped them and a small area surrounding them. And they moved slowly with their bodies slouched over, as though they were asleep. Introducing… the Sleepy-Time robots.

'Those guys…' Rebak said, whispering. 'Are unbearable.'

'They don't seem so bad.' Sandy said. 'Just sneak up on 'em while they're sleepin' and take 'em out.'

'So what's the catch?' Squidward asked. 'There must be a catch.'

Rebak nodded. 'If you're quiet and stay away from them, you're fine. But make too much noise or get inside that little field of theirs, and you're toast. And my friends will be chewing on your roasted flesh for weeks.'

SpongeBob winced. 'Eugh… I don't like that mental image.'

'But we'll be fine, as long as you follow me and stay quiet.'

Patrick opened his mouth wide and took a deep breath, most likely to yell out something like 'GOT IT!', before Sandy slammed her hand over his face and clamped his jaw shut. The rest of them nodded, that strange creaking sound being the only one they made.

'Good.' Rebak said. 'Now, this way.'

The angler fish led our heroes across the balcony, nice and quietly, and SpongeBob took the time to stare at the wonderful sculptures that lay behind big pieces of glass and the beautiful paintings hung up on the wall. Most of the artworks were the crazy abstraction and expressionism kinds, though there were a few more recognisable shapes. Such as a fake bathroom that looked strikingly similar to his, with two people who looked even more strikingly similar to his friends.

'Are you guys ready to do a little jumping?' Rebak asked.

'We've done enough of that today.' Squidward muttered. 'A little more couldn't hurt.'

'Good. Cos we gotta climb those wooden platforms. They're the only way above this wall of lasers.'

For one reason or another, the museum had long wooden boards balancing on top of tall towers made of tires. Whether that was meant to be a real method of transport or just another piece of art, our heroes couldn't tell. Anything was possible in Rock Bottom. One by one, our heroes followed Rebak onto the massive seesaws. It messed with their heads as it tilted up and down to their movements, making the jumps rather disorienting to make.

'Come on, Squidward.' Sandy said, whispering quite loudly. 'It isn't that hard of a jump.'

'I'm not much of a jumper, alright?' Squidward said. 'These legs are good for running. Not so much, you know, jumping.'

Even though Sandy had to drag Squidward and Patrick up to the highest point, it didn't take them too long to reach the top. Once there…

'Wait,' Rebak said. 'We have a small problem.'

The next platform to reach was another balcony, this one on the second level instead of the top floor. That wasn't the problem, since it was easy to reach. The problem was that there was a Sleepy-Time robot right in their path. Once they hopped over the laser wall to their next destination, the robot's light was only a few feet away from them.

'Now what?' Patrick asked, finally realising that he was supposed to whisper.

SpongeBob put his hand to his chin. 'Hm… I bet I might be able to sneak up on it and take it out. I can be pretty hard to detect if I wanna be.'

Squidward groaned. 'Oh, he's right.'

'Alright.' Rebak said. 'We're screwed either way.'

'Time for a little sleepy sneak…'

SpongeBob pulled out his bubble wand and got up on his tippy-toes. That was enough to stop his shoes from making that famous squeaking sound, and he tip-toed over to the sleeping robot.

'PATRICK.' Squidward said. 'Would you stop playing that tiny piano?'

Patrick put the tiny piano back into his pocket. 'Sorry. SpongeBob gave it to me, so…'

The light above SpongeBob turned red, prompting him to stop for a moment. He kept going once nothing else happened.

'Go, SpongeBob.' Patrick cheered in whispers. 'I know you can do it.'

Sandy pulled out her lasso. 'Who needs sneakiness anyway?'

'Sandy.' Squidward said. 'No.'

Once he was close enough, SpongeBob smacked the Sleepy-Time with his bubble wand as hard as he could. The robot woke up, but the bubble wand ended its mechanical life half a second later. It collapsed onto the floor in two pieces, and SpongeBob smacked it a second time just to be sure. Now, it was three pieces, with hardly anything left of it but a big cloud of dust that spread into the air and enveloped SpongeBob much like its light.

'Got it!' SpongeBob said (still whispering), and he gave his friends a thumbs-up. 'The robot has been taken care o… c-c-ca…'

And that cloud of dust was about to be just as much of a problem as - even not an even bigger one than - the light would've been.

'Ah… ahhh…'

The rest of our heroes and their guide gasped, whispering desperate pleads for him to not do the thing he was obviously about to do.

'SpongeBob!'

'Don't, you moron! You'll wake them all.'

'AHHH…'

And no matter how hard he tried to fight it, it only got worse. The others stood perfectly still, as though any movement would send them hurtling over a cliff. Sandy was the only one who dared to move at all.

'AHH-!'

She dashed across the floor and grabbed onto SpongeBob's face, clamping his mouth and nose tightly in her hand. Everyone stood still in silence, not daring to move a muscle until they were certain that the crisis had been averted. And only then did Sandy carefully remove her hand from SpongeBob's face, making every movement as quietly as possible.

SpongeBob held his breath for a few seconds, before he sighed with relief. 'Phew… thanks SaaaAAAHHH-CHOOOOO!'

In the dead silence of the museum, the sound boomed and echoed like a big clap of thunder. There was just a split moment of quiet, before a small alarm on every single one of the Sleepy-Times went off. Suddenly, our heroes found themselves being stared at by at least a dozen of the big and troublesome robots.

SpongeBob could only laugh nervously. 'Hehe… uh, bless me?'

'SPONGEBOB!' Squidward yelled. 'How do you manage to have both the best and worst timing I've ever seen?!'

'Never mind that!' Rebak said. 'Now that they're all awake, we've gotta run!'

Our heroes charged across the balcony as quickly as they could. Half of the robots were on the other side of the building and already on their way. The other half emitted small blue pillars of lights from the tops of their heads, taking aim at them already. When the lights made contact, they could feel their flesh beginning to burn.

'OW!' Patrick whined. 'I didn't ask for a tan.'

Squidward fished out his clarinet, almost dropping it out of panic. He played the loudest and most obnoxious note he could, barely able to concentrate with the heat against his skin. It managed to destroy the closest Sleepy-Time, but none of the others. He simply wasn't close enough.

'OVER HERE!' Rebak yelled.

There was a big stack of metal crates placed near the end of the balcony, serving as a series of steps onto the next floor. All five of our heroes ducked behind them, thankful that their flesh no longer felt like it was burning off. Still, they could hear the robots getting ever closer and preparing to shoot again.

'Ow…' Patrick murmured. 'That hurts.'

'I see why y'all are so frightened by those things!' Sandy said. 'One little sound, and they burn ya ta a crisp!'

'We almost got out of that scrap.' Squidward said. 'Until a certain someone ruined it all.'

'Hey!' SpongeBob said, looking rather offended. 'It wasn't like I was trying to wake them all up. It… it was an accident.'

'Now what?' Patrick asked.

'We're boned.' Rebak replied. 'Our best bet would probably be to just sit here and hope they run out of batteries before we starve to death.'

SpongeBob inched away from Patrick, just a little. If you know a thing or two about sea star biology, especially their diet, you might understand his reaction.

'Hey, I have an idea.' Sandy said. 'If those robots were ta trip inta those lasers, they'd be sliced!'

'I'll admit, that sounds like a good idea.' Squidward said. 'Except… how do we trick them into going into those lasers to begin with?! They seem to be avoiding them intentionally.'

'Oh, I know!' Patrick said. 'What if we turned the lasers off, and then turned them back on?'

'Hang on…' Rebak said. 'I think you're onto something! Turn off the lasers, lure them all into one spot, turn the lasers back on and BLAM-O. Robots eliminated. The button is located just across from here. It might be kinda painful to reach though.'

SpongeBob peeked out from behind his metallic shelter, making sure to stay in shadow so the observant robots couldn't see him. He could see the button alright - it was on the wall, easily reached from a platform that served as the lid of an exhibit. The middle of the room was covered in lasers, but some other exhibits would make for some helpful platforms.

'I'll go press it.' He said. 'After that, Sandy can use her lasso to keep just out of reach while the robots gather around her. Then, I'll hit the button again.'

'Y'all wanna do that?' Sandy asked. 'SpongeBob, can't ya see those robots? It could be suicide!'

He placed his hand upon her suit. 'Sandy, it has to me. I'm the one who sneezed and woke them all up. I'll let you know as soon as you can lure them. … If you don't wanna do that, I can-'

She smiled. 'I'll do it, SpongeBob. And then we can get out of here alive.'

SpongeBob peeked out from behind the boxes again. He may not have been sure of his plan, but he knew he had to try. It was his bad wish and questionable timing that got them in this situation to begin with. So, he climbed on top of the boxes and waved his arms out to get the robots' attention.

'Hey, rust buckets!' He yelled. 'Over here!'

The Sleepy-Times rolled around the lasers to get even closer to him, most of them waiting to get closer so they could properly take aim. Taking a deep breath, SpongeBob leapt over them and the lasers over to the next platform. Only a couple of jumps, and he could do it…

He could feel his skin heating up under the light of the robots; thank Neptune he could simply regenerate any burnt skin, but it still hurt like heck in the moment. Wiping the sweat off his forehead, he jumped to the second exhibit. And thank goodness too, because the last one couldn't handle the heat anymore and burst into flames.

'Oh boy!'

The next jump was easy - the button was right there. Unfortunately, there wasn't anywhere else to go other than the lasers and robots. So, as quickly as he could, he set up a thick wall made entirely of bubble. Perhaps not the best defence you could have, but better than nothing. With that, he smacked the button.

The lasers all went off at once.

'That's your cue, Sandy!' SpongeBob yelled.

'Happy ta oblige!' She said.

She got on top of the boxes and threw her lasso up as high as she could. Which was pretty dang high. It caught into a tire-shaped light fixture, and she swung into the middle of the room. The rope kept her just out of reach of the robots' deadly lasers.

'Over here!' She yelled. 'I'll be a lot easier ta roast than tha cheesecake.'

The Sleepy-Times appeared to agree, because they changed their course and aimed for her. She could feel her tail beginning to smoke, so she climbed up a little higher. The robots weren't so happy with this, and tried to get close enough to hurt her.

Rolling into the middle of the room in the process.

'Now, SpongeBob!' She said.

'ON IT!'

SpongeBob smacked the button with his bubble wand, and all the lasers turned on at once. In a matter of moments, they sliced into the robots and reduced them to piles of scrap on the floor.

'We did it!' SpongeBob said, turning the lasers off again. 'Victory screeeeech! OLOLOLO-'

'Okay, maybe later.' Sandy said, climbing to the top of the rope to grab her lasso, and then helicoptering her way down. 'We still gotta get outta here.'

'I gotta say,' Rebak said. 'The Rock Bottomites oughta appreciate you getting rid of all of those nasty robots from our museum. Even if we had to wake them up first…'

'Fantastic.' Squidward said, sarcasm so thick you could cut it. 'Can we go now?'

With the lasers de-activated and the robots gone, making it up to the entrance of the museum was easy as cake. The buz stop wasn't too far away now, and soon our heroes could get out of this advancedly-dark trap. But someone exited a door right next to the entrance , and it was someone who SpongeBob and Patrick knew very well.

'What in the name of-?' Barnacle Boy, donning a security badge, said. 'Oh, it's you.'

'Barnacle Boy!' SpongeBob yelled. 'Are you on patrol down here?'

'No, this is my second job. I work security, because being a semi-retired superhero doesn't really pay the bills. It was going great until the robots showed up. Any more questions?'

'Do you have to iron those pants or are they wrinkle free? Unlike you…'

Barnacle Boy tried to ignore this second comment. 'There's a robot apocalypse going on, and that's what you choose to ask me? If we don't get it resolved, Shady Shoals will shut down and I'll have to move back in with my son and his wife and his four screaming kids.'

'Wait,' Patrick said. 'You have four grandkids?'

'Oh yeah!' SpongeBob said. 'I've actually met one of them. Jackie is really loud, but she-'

'Bored.' Squidward said. 'Goodbye.'

The octopus tried to leave, but Barnacle Boy stood in front of him. Squidward was very tempted to push him to the ground, but he saw the superhero as so pathetic that it wasn't worth it.

'Now wait just a minute.' Barnacle Boy said. 'We've been having a major robot problem of our own in the Mermalair.'

SpongeBob gasped. 'Those fiends have invaded the Mermalair? How dare they!'

'Tell me about it. Mermaid Man and I tried dealing with them, and… look, if it was just a few we'd be okay. But the place is littered with them! We're gonna need some help if we want to get ridda them. And, well, I have the International Justice League of Super Acquaintances right in front of me. Alright, so you're not in costume, but you're still here.'

'Wait a moment.' Sandy said. 'Are ya implyin' that ya want us ta help ya clear out your lair?'

'I'm asking you to help. After a show like that, you've proven yourself quite capable of dealing with robots. We're struggling back at the Mermalair, and we need help.'

Now, Sandy was a bit ambivalent on the whole thing due to greater problems at hand. Squidward didn't really want to do it at all, though he'd allow himself to get dragged along because the Mermalair would be nothing compared to Rock Bottom. Patrick was happy, obviously, but it was nothing compared to SpongeBob.

'REALLY?!' He cried, with a smile so big its corners were going off his face. 'You want us to go to the Mermalair and help you?!'

Barnacle Boy sighed. 'Unfortunately, yes.'

'Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go!'

SpongeBob ran out of the building, into the darkness without caring a bit about it. The buz stop wasn't too far away now, after all. Barnacle Boy just sighed and followed after him, with the rest of our heroes trailing close behind him.

'Uh, I'm still here.' Rebak said, to remind us all that he's still in this scene. 'I'd like to see you off!'

It only took about five buses (curse that kandy machine), but finally our heroes managed to track down a bus that wouldn't just leave after five seconds. Rebak was waving them goodbye as they all - Barnacle Boy included - boarded it. Other residents from Rock Bottom gathered around them, waving them off too. After all, SpongeBob and his friends had won back the museum.

'GOOD - PBFFT - BYE, Sponge - PBFFT -Bob!'

'Hope to - PBFFT - see you - PBFFT - again soon!'

'Remember to - PBFFT - write to me!'

Most of our heroes took their seats so they could get home already, but SpongeBob took his time to return the goodbyes.

'Goodbye - PBFFT - Rock Bottomites!' He said. 'I can't - PBFFT - wait to - PBFFT - come back!'

There was one fish among the crowd that caught his attention, and only because she stood out so well. She held a couple of stolen paintings under her fin, and was sneaking around in the darkness.

'Hi Mrs Puff!'

The pufferfish in question flinched, and groaned when she saw who was staring at her. 'Oh sweet Neptune. Uh, hi, SpongeBob. Don't mind me. Just… carrying some artwork.'

'Why do you want all that artwork, Mrs Puff?'

'DON'T ASK QUESTIONS YOU AREN'T PREPARED TO HANDLE THE ANSWERS TO!' She shouted, getting up all in his face and screaming at the top of her lungs.

SpongeBob was stunned into silence, and got pulled inside the bus by a highly-impatient Squidward.

'Next - PBFFT - stop!' The bus driver said. 'Bikini - PBFFT - Bottom!'

Author Notes - Okay, I just REALLY wanted to include Mrs Puff's most beloved line from the game. The scene probably seems a little forced and rushed because of that. I was thinking about moving it elsewhere, but really... this is where the line belongs. And I knew that it would be a crime to remove it.

I named the angler fish because calling him simply 'the angler fish' the whole chapter was going to drive me positively nuts. 'Rebak' is 'Baker' spelt backwards. As in, Dee Bradley Baker, the guy who provides the voice. Since I'm sure at least some of you are thinking about it, the 'not all light-bearing angler fish are female' joke was just me addressing the biological inaccuracy in a humorous way. The joke was supposed to be at Sandy's expense, not Rebak's.