Authors Note:
Hey, y'all hope you're enjoying this! Leave me a comment and tell me what you think! I really appreciate the hits I've been getting!
This chapter is mainly a filler chapter, but its so long cause I really wanted to focus on Ed's mental health. This chapter made me a little sad to write. Also, Edwin fans are gonna be fed good this chapter! Hope y'all enjoy!
Ed winces as he pulls a black tank top over his head. His whole body ached as he pulled the rest of his clothes on. Apparently, suffering a panic attack that made you pass out would exhaust his body without him realizing it. He grunted once more as he pulled on his red coat.
"You alright, Brother?" Al asked worriedly
"Of course. Now, let's blow this place."
Al lets out a small metallic chuckle in amusement. Ed smirked. He loved it when his brother laughed. It was something that was few and far between these days. He pushes down the old ache of guilt trying to rear its ugly head. He couldn't deal with that right now.
They walked along the front steps to where lieutenant Breda was waiting.
"How're you feeling, big guy?" The lieutenant's smirk was one of concern and humor
"I'm fine," that was a lie. Ed's body ached as he had been making way to the car. He had hoped Al hadn't noticed.
"That's good." Breda opened the door. Apparently, Al had noticed that Ed had been aching because he didn't let him get in the car himself.
When he got comfortable, Ed rolled his eyes. His younger brother was way too overprotective.
He leans his head against the window, watching the scenery go by. He could hear Breda and Al talking in the back of his mind. He's too focused on what he's going to have to tell the colonel. The memory of that woman's eyeless face scares him when he thinks back on it.
Ed was very used to blood. He had gotten used to being injured on missions. He would always injure his opponents worse than he was.
Usually, when he was finished with them, they'd be bleeding from multiple nonlife-threatening. He would have wounds of different sizes. He could handle the blood from wounds and fights well.
After these fights, Al patched him up if they were minor. If he had been severely wounded, then he would have been forced into the hospital and released when he had recovered.
This situation was so incredibly different from the ones he was used to facing.
On missions, he had come to accept that innocent people would die. After all, he couldn't save everyone. He would allow grief to come for him and he would silently mourn those he wasn't able saved.
It wouldn't take him long to move past the grief. He knew that those people weren't killed because of him, but because of a psychotic alchemist who thought they could get away with their experiments.
The grief hits him hard as he thinks of that woman. He finds himself forcing back hot tears as he rests his head on the window. She could have been a daughter, wife, or friend.
Nobody would ever see her again because of him. He was a failure.
He'd always been a failure. Since the very first day he committed Human Transmutation. It had been three years since then. Three years his brother had been trapped in that miserable metal shell. Three years of failed promises to return his body back to normal.
Months of women being killed. Months of families learning that their daughters were killed so horribly that an open casket was out of the question.
Ed choked back the wailing sob that was trying to make its way up his throat. How was he going to keep his composure when talking to Mustang? He's barely composed as it was thinking about the woman.
He takes a shaky breath and steels himself for what is about to come.
Havoc stood up from his chair and stretched his hands above his head. He looks down at his watch, 3:00.
'About an hour until the chief gets here'. Havoc glances at the door to Mustang's inner office.
The man was trying to get some paperwork done before he had to take down Ed's report of events.
He's jolted out his thoughts by a sharp knock on the door. The timid secretary comes in and looks around the room. She puts one foot forward before she jolts to a stop. She looks at him and stares for a second.
"Are you looking for someone?"
The secretary jumped. "S-Sorry. A man brought this by earlier and said to give this to you, Lieutenant Havoc." She held out a small piece of paper.
Havoc took the piece of paper from the secretary. He gave her his thanks and returned to his seat to read it. His eyebrows rose a little as he read it. Well, this was certainly interesting.
3:15
Train station
Winry Rockbell. Don't. Be. Late
Havoc was confused. Why was Winry Rockbell coming to Central? Had Ed called her? Nothing seemed to be wrong with his automail.
Havoc was curious, to say the least. He glanced down at his wristwatch. It was nearly that time. Better get there before Miss Rockbell wondered where he was.
Havoc knocked on the colonel's door. He was going to tell him where he was going and to see if Mustang knew anything about Winry Rockbell.
"Come in," Mustang's muffled voice replied. Havoc stepped into the doorway.
"Just going to pick up Miss Rockbell, sir. Her train arrives in a few minutes."
"Miss Rockbell?" Mustang frowned. Ed hadn't mentioned calling his mechanic and telling her to come to Central.
"Yeah. I got a note from the receptionist." Havoc handed Mustang the small piece of paper.
Mustang read it. He glanced up at Havoc then back down at the note.
"Ed never said he was going to call his Mechanic when I left the hospital." He tells the lieutenant.
Havoc nods. "Any chance its a mistake, sir?"
Mustang shakes his head. "I don't think it is."
"Just go ahead and pick her up. I'll ask what happened when she gets here."
Havoc nodded. He closed the door behind him on the way out.
Mustang massaged his forehead. Things were getting really weird. First last night's accident, then Miss Rockbell. None of this could be a coincidence, could it? He shakes his head. He had a feeling that this was all connected.
Winry sighed in relief as she stepped off the train, her duffle bag over her shoulder. Who knew that there were trains that could get to Central within a few hours. Her blue eyes scanned the crowd of people, searching for one of the Colonel's men.
She smiled as she saw Lieutenant Havoc making his way over to her. He smiled when he got up to her.
"It's good to see you again, Miss Rockbell." He took her bag for her.
"You too." They walked to the car and she smiled when he opened the door for her.
He had been driving for a few minutes when Winry breaks the silence.
"So, what's Ed been up to that caused him to break his automail yet again?
That catches Havoc off guard. That didn't make sense. Ed hadn't broken his automail. It wasn't destroyed or banged up from last night's events. So who told her that it needed to be fixed?
Havoc realizes that he's been silent for too long when she calls his name.
"I don't know all of the details myself. I'm sure the colonel will be able to fill you in. I wasn't on the mission Ed was on." He sees her expression turn to annoyance before she looks at the window.
They're almost at HQ when Havoc finally decides to ask who called her and told her that Ed broke his automail.
"Hey, so who called and told you that Ed broke his automail?"
"Oh, it was someone called Lieutenant Damian Anamala." Now Havoc is very confused. There was nobody with that name under Mustang's command.
"Don't think I've heard of them." He tells her.
Winry's eyes narrow. "That's who he told me he was when he called."
Havoc doesn't say anything else. He decides he can say something about it to the colonel when they get to HQ.
Ed is jolted out of his thoughts by a tap on his flesh shoulder. He turns his head. Breda has opened the door for him and is waiting for him to get out. He mutters a quick 'sorry' and gets out.
His aching body screams at him as he walks up the stairs to Mustang's office.
"Do you need me to carry you, brother?" Al's concerned eyes are on him.
"No, Al. I'm fine." He pants. He definitely was not fine.
He sees Breda give him a look of concern from the corner of his eye. Why can't everyone stop worrying about him? He was not a fragile person! He was the youngest state alchemist in existence. He could take a little panic attack and concussion!
He was very out of breath when they finally reached the floor Mustang's office was on. Climbing the stairs had only intensified the aching in his body. He bent his knees a little as he tried to calm down his panting, both Al and Breda watching him.
He hates this, absolutely hates it. Neither of them should see him this weak.
"You need a minute?" Breda asks.
He shakes his head and stands up from his bent position. He needed to get himself together. It wouldn't do his reputation any good if someone knew that he was sore. They walk down the hallway and finally get to Mustang's office.
Breda opens up the door and he nearly chokes at what he sees. Sitting at Mustang's desk was his crush, Winry Rockbell.
Winry turns around when she sees Mustang staring past her. Her face lights up when she sees him.
"Winry, what are you doing here!" He yells.
He ignores Mustang's chuckle. He winces when he sees Winry's face turn to anger.
Somehow her wrench materializes into her hand.
"Thanks for being happy to see me, Ed." Her voice fills with annoyance.
She looks him up and down and her blushes. Her face turns into confusion when she looks down at his automail.
"You're...automail. It isn't broken." She holds his automail arm in her grasp, looking it over.
Ed's brow furrows in confusion. Why would his automail be broken? He hadn't banged it up last night that he knew of. Wait. Why did Winry come to Central the day after the accident?
"Why would my automail be broken, Winry?"
Her faces turns to annoyance once again. "Like I told the Colonel, someone called me and told me you broke your automail. I'm not making this up."
Winry looks up at his forehead and her eyebrows furrow. "What happened to your head."
"Mustang and I were getting ready to talk about that. I had a small incident last night and got a concussion."
Winry's face turns to worry. "You're ok though, right?" She takes his face in her hands and looks at the small, stitched wound. Ed pulls back in embarrassment and hopes he isn't blushing.
"Of course I'm ok. It doesn't even hurt."
Winry rolls her eyes like she doesn't believe him.
"Fullmetal, I think its time we get started on your report." Mustang beckoned to him.
"I'm coming." He rolled his eyes. Winry punched him softly in the shoulder.
He shot her a playful dirty look and went after Mustang.
All of Mustang's men and Al laughed together. Those two were so oblivious.
Mustang pulls out a piece of paper as Ed sits down on the couch in Mustang's office.
"So, what were you doing in the library?" Mustang asks.
"I had gone to follow up on a theory I had on who the killer might have been." Mustang writes that down and looks back up.
"What was your lead?"
Ed takes a moment to think about all he had found.
"I used a map and tracked the area where the victims were found. I found the murders centered around the rich part of town. I was wondering why one of the rich elite would want to kill someone but then I got the idea to search for anyone that died with the last name on the letter we got,"
Mustang nodded for him to continue.
"I found a name with someone with that last name. Her name was Leiana Anamala. She was found in an alley outside of a bar. Her father, Damian Anamala was the first to find her. I then checked and looked to see when the first killings began. Leiana was murdered in March, but the killings began in May. I was confused, so I was going to go back to the dorms when I tripped over the body-"
Ed was startled to see how Mustang went rigid as he gave his report.
"Mustang, what's wrong? Ed had never seen Mustang do this when he usually gave his reports.
Mustang stood up and flung the door open, startling everyone in the office.
"Miss Rockbell, you said that the name of the person who called you was called Damian Anamala?" Roy asked quickly.
Ed froze. Suddenly everything made sense.
Their killer was Damian Anamala. He had warned him in the letter that he knew about Winry. Damian Anamala probably knew that he had been at the library last night. He had called Winry.
He had found Winry. Beautiful Winry. The person that he had hoped one day hoped to be with, the girl who he had kissed only once before, the girl who had kissed him back and promised she'd wait for him.
Their killer had found the one person he cared about and wanted to be with and made a declaration that he would kill her if he stepped out of line. He felt his heart crack. He couldn't do this. He couldn't handle her dying. It would break him.
Winry was a light in his life. She made him smile, something that was very hard to do. She could go head to head in an argument. It was something he hated at first, but he grew to love. She was as hotheaded as he was. She was his match. Someone he just couldn't live without.
Before he knows it, the world is blurring. He can't breathe. Winry's going to end up dead because of him. He feels a heavy hand on his shoulder. He can't stay here anymore. He can't let anyone see him like this. Hot tears fill his eyes as he runs from the room. Someone yells his name but he doesn't slow down to see who it is.
Winry stares at the door Ed had run through. She turns to look at Mustang, who's eyes are widened in horror.
"What's the significance of that name?" She demands.
The shocked expression on Mustang's face changes to an unidentifiable emotion.
"That's the name of our serial killer." That's all Mustang has to say for Winry to be horrified and for her eyes to tear up.
Al stands beside Winry and puts a hand on her shoulder.
"We're not going to let anything happen to her. First, we need to go and find brother."
Winry nods. "Well bring him back once he's calmed down." She goes to leave the room, but the colonel stops her.
"I need to speak with Al actually, it's in regard to a plan we have to stop Fullmetal from doing something stupid." Winry nods. She looks at Al and can tell he's a ball of anxiety.
"He'll be ok, Al. I can talk to him." She reassures him.
"Are you sure? It's sometimes very hard to calm brother down."
"Yes, Al. I think I'll be ok." She gives him a reassuring smile. He gives her a slight nod and turns to the colonel.
She runs out of the room quickly.
'Where would he go? He would hide in the bathroom at home.' Then it clicks in her head. He probably was hiding in the bathroom.
Her hand freezes on the doorknob when she hears sobbing. Her heart cracked. Her sky blue eyes filled with tears, remembering the night where he had told her that he needed her, the first night he had kissed her.
Winry walked quietly outside, a blanket around her. The cool night air chilled her skin. She loved cool nights like these. She sat down on the steps, listening to the crickets chirp. She had been sitting out there a few short minutes when she heard the door open behind her.
She smiled as Ed came and sat down heavily beside her. Her smile wavered a little when she saw his face. He was pale and his face had a light sheen of sweat. He didn't look ok. Ed let out a shaky breath and placed his face in his hands.
She shifted to be closer beside him. She placed her hand on his shoulder, a way to show him that he was there for him. She felt him relax at her touch. Then all of a sudden, he sobbed.
This was not the typical sob. It was a loud, heart - wrenching sound, only seeming to grow louder. Tears stung Winry's eyes. She always hated watching him sob, he would only sob when everything got to him, when he was falling apart at the seams.
A wailing scream ripped through his throat and he fell into her. She was paralyzed for a second, then her instincts kicked in. She wrapped her arms against him, burying her face in his golden hair. She cried with him. It hurt. It hurt to see him sob and scream his pains out.
He was the strongest person she knew and even the strongest person could break. She didn't know how long she held him for. It could have just been a few minutes or it could have been an hour or two. His sobs eventually subsided into hiccuping.
She felt him shift to where his face was pressed into her neck. She smiled sadly. It was something she vaguely remembered him doing when he was seven and he had broken his wrist. He didn't shift for a while and she began to think that he had succumbed to exhaustion and fallen asleep.
She moved a little and he immediately wrapped his arms around her waist. She got the message. He didn't want her to move. So they sat like that. Winry didn't know for how long. Finally, Ed lifted his head and stared at her with swollen, golden eyes.
"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked softly. He shook his head at first but then he nodded. She waited for him to start whenever he wanted to.
"I watched you die." She looked at him in confusion.
"In my dream, I watched you die." He didn't look at, just at his hands.
"There was an alchemist holding you hostage. He wanted me to give myself up. Told me that he wouldn't hurt you if I did. I believed him,"
He swallowed hard before continuing.
I walked over to him slowly and detached my right arm as he wanted. I told him to let you go. That I had done what he wanted. All he did was smile and slit your throat."
His voice broke as he finished telling her. She pressed herself against him.
"I'm not going anywhere. You're not getting rid of me that easily."
"I hope you wouldn't. I'm nothing without you." He ducked his head
He looked at her, eyes softening. Her blue eyes looked into his. Ed saw many different emotions as he stared into beautiful blue eyes.
Something caught in his chest. He didn't know what it was. Was it love? Maybe. He didn't know. All he could do was stare at blue eyes filled with unshed tears. She was beautiful with the way she looked against the barely rising sun. He leaned forward.
And kissed her.
He kissed her softly. He pulled back when she didn't move. He felt guilty.
He glanced down at his lap and avoided her eyes.
Ed jumped in surprise a little when she took his chin in her hands and made him look at her. She studied his face for a second and then she kissed him back.
He was kissing Winry Rockbell and she was kissing him back.
Ed let out a small laugh when they parted, resting his forehead against hers.
He wanted to spend the rest of his life like this.
"I'm willing to wait for you." He glanced up at Winry in shock.
Winry was willing to wait for him? Someone broken beyond repair? She wanted to be with someone who had never stopped screwing up? It was unbelievable. Tears welled in his eyes again.
Winry Rockbell was willing to look past his flaws and wanted to be with him. He didn't know what to say, so he kissed her again.
They stayed out there, holding hands and sneaking kisses until the sun had risen.
Winry breaks her thoughts from the memory. He needed her now, just like he needed her then. She opened the door and walked inside. Her heart nearly broke when she saw him huddled in the corner, head in his knees.
His crying quieted down when he realized that someone had just entered the bathroom. He looked up slowly to see who it was. Her heart fell as she saw his face crumble, but thankfully he didn't start crying again.
He moved over for her, a silent gesture that meant he wanted her there. She silently sat down beside him, taking his flesh hand. She squeezed it. He squeezed back. He leaned his head on her shoulder. Winry could feel him trembling. Ed was so upset.
After a few minutes, Winry finally worked up the courage to talk about why he was so upset.
"Are you ok?" He shakes his head.
It's fine if he doesn't want to talk about it, she'll stay with him as long as she has to.
"All these murders are because of me." He finally says. Winry's confused, why would they be because of him?
She shook her head. "No, they aren't. There because of some sick and disillusioned person. This isn't your fault."
Ed released a dry laugh. "The guy wrote me a letter and told me that he hoped that he finally got my attention, Winry. All these murders were because of me."
Winry didn't know how to respond to that. She knew that he was never going to not blame herself. Then she wondered why he froze when she said that the man who had called her was the killer.
"Ed, why did you freeze when I told the colonel the name of the person who called me. What was in that letter?"
She didn't expect him to answer her but was surprised when he did.
"In the letter, he told me that if I didn't meet him tonight by 12:30 then he would kill you. He knew about you, Winry. I don't know how, but he did,"
Winry's eyes widen. How would this killer know anything about her? That didn't make any sense.
"I decided after I read the letter that I was going to stop him. Last night I went to the library and did some research. I found his name, but I couldn't figure out if that was the right person because there was something about the motive that didn't add up,"
Ed swallowed hard and paused for a second before continuing.
"W-When I was leaving…" He had to stop himself. Emotion was choking him.
"When I was leaving, I walked down an alleyway to get back to the dorms. I wasn't paying attention and I tripped on something. I hit my head. That's how I got this," He motioned to the bandage on his forehead.
"I don't think I lost consciousness, but my head was killing me. I was able to sit up and that was when I saw her."
Winry's heart ached when she saw tears well up in his golden eyes.
"Her arms and legs had been cut off, her throat had been slit, and her eyes had been gouged out." Winry didn't know how Ed was speaking because he was crying so hard.
She wrapped her arms around him and he trembled against her.
"I couldn't breathe when I saw her. It got so hard to breathe. I tried, I really did. I just couldn't get my body to work. I passed out. I think Mustang and the team got there sometime later and got me to the hospital." He finished.
"Oh, Ed." She whispered. She buried her face in his hair and just held him.
"He knows about you, Win. He knows who you are to me." His face is buried in her neck as he speaks.
"Edward, look at me." She tells him. His golden eyes stare at her softly and she smiles at him sadly.
"Nobody is going to touch me, Ed. You wouldn't let them. I also know that you're going to catch this guy before he hurts anyone else."
"What if I can't? What if I'm not capable enough for this? I'm only fourteen, Win."
"Edward Elric has that ever stopped you before? You became the strongest state alchemist at 12! You essentially became the hero of the people overnight! You can do this Ed, I believe in you."
Ed wiped his face and then gave her a small smile.
"How can you believe in me like this? I've screwed up so many things in my life," His eyes shined with emotion only for her to see.
"I don't deserve you caring about me at all."
She took his face in her hands. "I told you that I was going to wait for you, Ed. That includes me being there when you need it." She said softly.
He ducked his hand. His mouth quirked up in a small smile.
"What would I be without your support?" He asked.
Winry laughed. "I don't know, but you'll never have to find out."
Then she leaned forward and kissed him.