Her mind felt frighteningly blank.
Silence surrounded her like a thick cloud, not letting her get her bearings, figure out what day it was or why she had this horrid headache. It was akin to toothache, throbbing and aching somewhere deep inside.
Still, she was more concerned about not being able to remember anything that she could use as a point of reference, to figure out what was going on. She probably needed to open her eyes to do that, but was afraid that the pain would intensify if she did.
She laid still, listening to the silence. Beneath her was a soft bed; her feet were covered with something warm and cozy.
With a heavy sigh, Lily slowly raised her eyelids, letting in daylight.
She knew right away where she was: the St. Mungo's hospital. The room was quite familiar to her – it was her father's once… After her mother died.
Lily inhaled carefully – the pain level remained the same. It appeared to be a sort of a constant, independent of any external stimuli.
The girl slowly turned – and met the clear gaze of green eyes behind the spectacles. Sitting on the chair, Albus appeared quite bored. Presently, his face lit up with a smile, showing the dimples that James would not let his little brother live down.
"Hi," he jumped from his chair and walked over to the bed. "I knew that you would come to as soon as Dad walked out of here. It's the law of life…"
"Dad?" Lily slowly propped herself up against the pillows and into a sitting position. "Don't tell me that the entire family has gathered here."
If only she knew the reason. The emptiness in her head remained, with only a vague sense of anxiety lurking deep beneath, as if waiting to pounce.
"Not yet," Albus sat on the edge of her bed and smiled again. "But I think that, unless Uncle Ron has gotten himself lost, they will be."
Lily groaned: they must all be nearly crazy with worry for her. Then her brother's words sank in, and Lily jumped:
"Uncle Ron?"
Well, something in her head has begun to fall into place. Why was Uncle Ron here? He left four years ago…
"It's a long story," Al replied seriously, sounding very mature, as he took a packet of lemon drops out of his pocket. "Want some?"
She shook her head no. The pain did not change. Now she would have appreciated someone to be here to actually answer her questions.
What happened? Why is her head hurting so?
"Daddy went to talk to the healer and to send off the owl," Albus stuffed several lemon drops behind his cheek at once, and sighed contentedly. "I promised him not to wake you."
"Well, you didn't wake me," Lily remarked, adjusting her blanket over her. She attempted to locate a single memory to anchor her mind. But her memories appeared jumbled, as though by a deliberate action. "Do you know what's happened to me?"
"Healers usually don't tell that sort of thing to their patients' little brothers," Al tried to smile, but that was even more problematic than speaking, what with his mouth full of candy.
"As though you didn't get it out of him anyway," Lily patted his arm. "By the way…," her eyes rested on the non-too-clean collar of his shirt, then on his school tie, and the vest with the Gryffindor emblem. Several pieces of the puzzle came together. "Why are you not in school?"
"A long story," repeated Albus. "As complicated as Uncle Ron's."
"At this rate, I shan't learn anything," the girl remarked. "How did I get here? Or is that a long story, too?"
"Not at all," Albus grinned. "That's easy: you were found at the Diagon Alley, unconscious."
Alright… Lily tried to remember something about that. No luck. Her mind was blank. She had no idea why she ended up at the Diagon Alley and what had happened before.
"I must have hit my head," she guessed, trying to find the reason for her headache.
"No," Albus said confidently, looking at her a little sadly. "You haven't have a scratch on you – the healer checked."
"Have I been here long?"
"When we arrived an hour ago, you were already here; only no one knew who you were," the boy looked back at the door. "Daddy is here."
Lily even felt relief: her father would explain things to her, while Albus sometimes was impossible to get a coherent answer out of. Dumbledore's presence in her brother's dreams could occasionally have a detrimental effect.
Harry came in quietly, almost tiptoeing, afraid of disturbing her. The girl smiled, feeling calm washing over her from one look at her father.
"Daddy, darling…"
He started, then smiled – a tad tiredly – and came to her bedside, setting his cloak on the chair in passing.
"So, how are you?" he sat on the opposite side of her bed and took her hand carefully, as though afraid to jostle her. "How do you feel?"
"As though I had hit my head," Lily admitted, wincing.
Harry stared at his daughter, a little surprised:
"The healer examined you and said that you showed no signs of trauma… At least none visible to the eye…"
"I have this really odd headache," Lily sounded a little guilty.
"I shall summon the healer, and he will check you out again. Then the Aurors will want to speak with you…" Lily's father started to get up, when the girl grabbed his hand. "What?"
"Daddy, did anything happen, why the Aurors?"
Harry returned to his place on her bed, watching her worriedly. Lily tried to remember something again, but to no avail.
"Lily," her father sounded scared. He looked back at Albus, but Lily's brother was staring at her, his lip caught between his teeth. "You had been kidnapped; you were missing for nearly three days…"
She gaped at him, utterly befuddled. Kidnapped? By whom? Why?
Harry was now thoroughly agitated.
"What can you remember? Where were you? With whom?"
"She remembers nothing," Albus walked around the bed and stood next to his father. "Blank…"
Lily felt dizzy now, and totally at a loss. Her father's face became white as a sheet.
"What do you mean 'blank'?" Lily looked at her brother.
"I don't know," the boy shrugged his shoulders. He pressed his father's hand, looking at her sadly.
"I'll get the healer," their father got up abruptly and dashed out of the room.
In the ensuing silence Lily was trying to get her bearings.
She'd been kidnapped. That's right, back in school, when she was a Fifth Year. Almost right after her mother died. But this was a long time ago, wasn't it? Years… At least, Lily was almost certain of that – that it had been a long time.
"You were taken, along with Xenia," Albus said quietly, sitting back onto her bed. "Daddy has just received an owl from Theo that Xenia was found. Like you."
"Xenia, that's right," Lily nodded, feeling anxious again. The pain inside sprang slightly to life, like pins and needles, bringing with it a feeling of despair and emptiness. "Is James with her?"
"They are on their way," Albus smiled. "That's what they wrote to Daddy. After they have checked on Xenia, they'll come here."
"Al, we have explained to you that sneaking into other people's minds is bad form."
"It is easier to do that than ask a million questions, half of which would remain unanswered," Lily's brother snorted. "Daddy hoped that you would be able to tell us what happened…"
"If someone told me first," Lily muttered, leaning back onto the pillows. Her head hurt worse, from constant attempts to remember or understand something.
From behind the door came the sounds of voices, many voices, as though everyone tried to talk at once. Lily and Albus exchanged glances, and Al hemmed:
"Here comes the royal guard…"
In a few moments, a healer entered the room, a tall witch. Her face showed no emotion, only a benevolent smile.
"Ah, here is our sleeping beauty… How are you feeling, dear?"
"As though I have missed half of my life," Lily said earnestly, sitting up. The healer leaned over her.
"No worries, we'll set you to rights," she promised, sounding a tad unsure. "There is a small crowd of visitors right outside your door, but I told them right from the start that I would not allow them to tire you out."
"I am sure they weren't too happy to hear that," Lily smiled weakly, imagining her elder brother's indignation at being denied entry.
"That's right," the witch turned towards Albus, who sat quietly on Lily's bed. "Leave us, please."
Lily's brother shrugged his shoulders and slipped out of the room. The voices grew louder, as though all the relatives turned on Albus, to learn what was happening inside the room.
"Your father said that you didn't remember what had happened to you…," the healer took out her wand and peered at Lily. The girl merely nodded. "Do you remember being at the Diagon Alley with Xenia, your brother James' wife?"
Lily frowned, attempting to remember the event the healer brought up through the pain deep in the back of her head.
"Yes, I do," Lily replied, elated, after a while. "I bought myself a new cloak."
"That's good. What happened then?"
"Hmm… We went home?" Lily replied, without certainty. Sharp pain, as if from a needle, pierced her head.
"Alright, calm down, everything is fine," the healer passed her wand in a circular motion around Lily's head, and pain slowly subsided. "You didn't go home; you and Xenia were abducted… You don't remember that, do you?"
"No," the girl replied firmly, watching the witch's wand. "It hurts…"
"The pain will go away presently."
"It is not my head…" Lily winced. She was in pain, indeed, but she wasn't sure why; even to locate the source of the pain was a challenge. As though… as though it was an echo of another, former pain.
"All right, dear," the healer lowered her wand. The smile faded from her face; her eyes were wary. "You rest now, and later we shall continue. Do not try to force yourself to remember anything, you hear?"
Lily nodded.
"Can my family come in?"
"No, you must rest now," the witch replied firmly.
"Please, just for a little while?" Lily pleaded. She had to finally get some answers.
"All right; five minutes, and not everyone at once," the healer relented. She left the room, and a moment later, Lily's father entered, with Albus.
"Where are the rest?" Lily smiled weakly at her still pale father.
"The way they looked made the healer recall that she has quite a few spare rooms available; so, threatened with hospitalization, they agreed to take some restorative potions," Harry smirked. "Don't worry, given how determined they are, they'll be here in a few… He was mighty worried about you…"
"No doubt," Lily hemmed. "For those three days that you are said I was missing, he must have been running all around town, playing detective, without any food or sleep…"
Harry nodded, hiding a sad smile:
"And he succeeded at that, just as always."
"When was it that Jim was good at tracking?" she smiled.
"Lily…" her father eyed her warily, again.
"What?"
"I am not talking about James."
"Whom about then?" the girl looked at her father inquiringly, then at Albus. Her brother's eyes were glued to her face, and she was on the verge of reprimanding him again, but the look on the face of the elder Potter brought back the sharp pain in her head and the feeling of emptiness.
"About your husband," Lily's father said carefully, watching her reaction.
Lily was at a loss for words. For several minutes she stared at him, trying to get the gist of the joke. When fear showed in his green eyes, she frowned, unsure of what he had said. Could it be that he, like James, was in need of a potion? Because her father, no doubt, had also been going crazy with worry, running all over the city for three days, searching for her.
"Daddy," she spoke carefully, "what husband? I am not married…"
"You don't remember your own wedding?" gasped Harry, terrified, gripping her hand. "What else do you not remember?"
"The engagement?" Lily asked in a whisper, trying to make sense of any of it. Judging by her father's face, he was not joking. A joke, indeed! "Daddy, to whom?"
The horror of Harry's face made her entire body seize up. What is going on?!
"Lily…"
The door opened, and Lily couldn't help but smile at James, although he looked dead on his feet. Tired, his clothing wrinkled, pale and thin, he looked more like a shadow of her older brother. But his eyes lit up with happiness at the sight of her, and he rushed to embrace her.
"Are you alright?" he swept her into a tight hug. "He didn't harm you, did he?"
She wanted to respond but, once she took her eyes off him, she could no longer remember what he had asked her. In the doorway, silver shadow-like, stock-still, stood Scorpius Malfoy. She wanted to ask what he was doing there, but the pain sliced through her with new vigour. Lily set her teeth, trying not to moan, and looked at her father.
This was when she truly understood and was terrified: her father stared at Malfoy in anguish and sympathy. The same expression he wore when he spoke of the husband she could not remember.
The moment when she met the silver gaze of James' best mate, she couldn't help but cry out: the pain hit her in the temple. Her vision blurred, and Lily felt even relieved when she knew she was about to faint. Better emptiness and oblivion…