Ambrosia

by AyaxRoses

'Love. To truly love, that was one of the only things in this world that would never die. Even if you wished it to. Subaru and Kamui had grown to understand this painfully well.' An alternative ending to the final battle and a future for Subaru and Kamui to be happy together. SubKam SubaruxKamui BL-Yaoi-Shounen-Ai Past Fuuma/Kamui.

7. Ambrosia: Zephyranthes

Ambrosia Chapter 7

Zephyranthes

(possible symbolic meanings: kind caresses, healing, love, 'will you help me?', sincerity...)

~March & April Chapter~

First Chapter update of the New Years'. Hopefully, this will be a good hopeful year. I am also so excited for the new Tokyo Babylon anime and maybe hopefully something X-related will come along the way. This chapter has a few mentions of other CLAMP universe characters in it because I love CLAMP and am working on reading towards all their manga I can which has been published in English. I'm almost through Tsubasa: reservoir Chronicles and am sad there is not more of the vampire twins.

Subaru takes Kamui out, spoils him, and with romantic tensions running high things get a little frustrating. It's becoming harder and harder for Kamui to ignore and brush aside what's been blossoming between him and Subaru. He attempts to spend more time away, reflecting, in an effort to keep himself grounded, though that backfires. These two keep dancing around each other's feelings though we're coming to a boiling point.

---

March

Wasn't somebody supposed to tell him, warn him, at some point in his life, that emotions and all those hormones didn't get more manageable with time?

At least that's how it felt.

Kamui buried his face down on the table in front of him. He sat beside a giggling Yuzuriha, ready for the floor to open and swallow him whole.

His boisterous friend seemed to stay in contact with every single Dragon of Heaven and of course Kusanagi. Arashi was no exception. Kamui found himself brought along to a video conversation with their still grieving friend, and former Dragon of Heaven.

The elegant dark-haired woman listened attentively from a video window up on the computer screen. Her expression, quite somber, greatly contrasting with Yuzuriha's beaming grins. Kamui had to wonder how they managed to maintain a close friendship with their stark differences. Then again he could say the same for himself, it seems his feline-like friend managed to get along well with just about everyone.

So, their video call was going well, peaceful even. Yes, things had been going just fine earlier…

"Aww, you look so pretty today!" Yuzuriha gushed, her eyes sparkling. The older girl didn't know quite how to take that compliment. She ducked her head down and softly ushered a word of thanks. Kamui smiled sympathetically, in quite a similar state, never knowing quite how to react to sincere compliments like that.

"Are things going well at Mt. Koya?" Yuzuriha asks, sweetly, though there's a hint of concern darkening bright brown orbs.

"Mhm," She acknowledges, eyes drifting off absently. Both of her friends felt a deep pang at their chest.

Kamui's violet orbs panged with empathy. His pain was different from the former Miko but still, he felt the ache healing from his own lost love. The fateful day at Tokyo Tower tore at his heartstrings and flooded his thoughts.

I don't know how I'd be going on if Subaru hadn't been there that day...Or if I'd ever even leave that place...

Arashi was on her own in Mt. Koya, finding answers, and a sense of connection or perhaps closure from where her departed love had spent most of his life. Hopefully, she felt some support there as well.

"It's actually a bit tranquil," Arashi adds on hurriedly, noting the crestfallen looks on her friend's faces. The background of her video screen shows a traditional Japanese styled room behind her. The antique walls and panel doors seen from the webcam, indicate she's likely in the temple right now, albeit in her own space. "Everyone's being so accommodating, welcoming me. So I'm quite fortunate," Arashi adds quite humbly, and there's a very small but still hopeful smile on her face.

"That's good to hear," Kamui chirps in for the first time since the call began. Save for a brief hello. Arashi nods at this. Kamui feels some reprieve talking to another of his reserved friends.

"How are things going over in Tokyo?"

"Really well! Or well enough~" Yuzuriha chimes. "It seems people are going back to their day to day lives. It's been really nice to be back to CLAMP school!"

Yuzuriha is practically bouncing from her chair. Her lips curl to a Cheshire cat smile that makes the boy beside her grimace.

"I can't wait till you come to transfer here!"

The bubbly girl beams, looking brighter than she had in a while. It was almost unnerving how much easily those words came out and with such earnestness.

"It'll be nice to have classes again," Arashi puts simply. There's a small smile again hidden amongst the pain of everything from the fated year. "And what about you Kamui?"

Kamui blinks at that. His mind wandered off. "What?"

"You're living with Sumeragi now, right? You two seemed quite close when I last saw you. Are things still well?"

"Y-yeah," Kamui stutters. He can feel his friend's mischievous gaze on him. "Things are going really well. Subaru is incredibly kind… It feels natural there," Kamui let his thoughts slip out. He groans and covers a hand in front of his mouth knowing what's to come.

"It's pretty much their love nest at this point," Yuzuriha teases. Kamui rolls his eyes, huffing. She sticks her tongue out at him and continues, with the most serious face she can muster. "They've been together almost three months now!~"

Kamui scoffs at this, but can't find the energy to reply to something like that. Though his expression can't keep firm, he has felt a sense of belonging since living together with Subaru. Though the choice of words caught up to him, and he lets out a soft sound between a whine and growl.

Unfortunately, for him, their serious friend had taken that implication to heart. Kamui's beet-red cheeks and hopeless smile from earlier, doesn't help matters either.

"O-oh," She flushes lightly. Though there's a bittersweet smile coming through as she looks at the former savior. She reminisces on her own actions with the one she loved. Their boisterous friend had an uncanny ability to grasp others' feelings better than they could. Not that she'd tell Kamui of course.

"So you two actually are now-"

"No!" Kamui exclaims much louder than needed to be. Oh, God! He feels his pulse racing at the implication Wait, 'actually?!' His mind repeats. Even Arashi had gotten that impression? His hand slapped flat upon the table as he rose from his seat without a second thought. Blood flows all across his face even his ears sting red at the outburst. He recalls just how he and Subaru were the last day they saw each other. Bleary, weak and heartbroken, he couldn't think more beyond giving into being held and taking in every ounce of warmth as Subaru carried him. He sits back down slowly, face now in flames.

"I mean… sorry. It's not like that with us." Kamui buries his face in his hands, groans, and mutters a string of curses.

"Oh, of course. I shouldn't have asked something like that," Arashi responds as kindly as possible. She offers her friend a sympathetic smile. Her eyes glimmer with guilt and sincerity. She closes her eyes and bows her head down.

"I'm sorry, I assumed…" She professes though still a bit mixed on how her former leader responded. Perplexed as well on what even made her curious, not one to really care for or look into others' personal relations. Though maybe it had to do with the feeling of relief her usually pained leader seeming brighter lately, with someone to make him smile again.

"N-no, it's not your fault," Kamui turns his gaze towards his friend. A harsh glare follows, but there's no animosity behind it.

"It just seems so… Odd for it not to be 'like that' though," Yuzuriha quotes her friend's overused words. Her precious Inuki walks up to her side and nuzzles against her leg. His ears perk up at the sound of his girl's cheerful tone and giggles.

Kamui's eyes turn more venomous. He's seething by now. Though he absently worries why he's been reacting this much today. Everything is a jumbled mess in his head.

"But I think that's a good thing! Having someone you're that close with is wonderful!" She explains. Yuzuriha holds her hands up in front of her like a barrier.

It didn't help that Kamui was clearly far more embarrassed and flustered than anything. Hormones were all over the place and Kamui wanted to run away from all this.

Although, he did seem to accept the response well enough, being impossible to deny how important the bond they shared was to him. Still, it only seemed more certain there was possibly something more developing.

The joyful girl worked to contain her laughter. even while looking at a sulking and irritated Kamui. She gently placed a hand on her friend's arm, calming down. The girl gave an apologetic smile.

Kamui accepted it for now. Though he knew his friends weren't exactly one to quit talking about this altogether.

Keeping an ever composed face, Arashi looks sympathetically towards Kamui. The latter took a few moments to cool down. His mind becomes more of a mess.

Arashi asked something simply on the lines of how the holidays were at CLAMP school. Kamui thinks he was too busy burying his face in his arms on the table.

"It was amazing!" Yuzuriha chirps. The cheerful girl beside him is entirely beaming! "Even Kamui went to the Masquerade with me!"

Kamui looks up, smiles at this, albeit uneasy. His bubble-gum pink lips shake.

"Well, he did for the first hour…"

The poor teen buries his face right back again. It didn't help even Arashi now mistook his relationship with his roommate. She listens quietly to his friends ramble on how Kamui did in fact sneak away to meet with the older man.

While he didn't regret it for a second it was hard. He could talk to Subaru about most everything…

But what was he supposed to do when his concerns were about Subaru himself? Or more so how mixed up he's been feeling.

---

-White Day-

Popularity certainly came with its costs. Kamui's school bag was overflowing with various bags of square-shaped white-powdered sugar cookies. The more perfected and decorated ones of the bunch would be given to Yuzuriha.

Several bags were nearly sealed and tied for classmates and admirers who gave him friendly and obligatory treats. Though he did have fun baking cookies at his home with Subaru (a then flustered flour-coated mess). It was tedious to try and do it for every return. So a trip out to acquire some store-bought, but still, very aesthetic cookies were needed.

By certainly not accepting any honmei chocolates he didn't have to worry about adding on too much work.

Kamui heard rumors of how much money some would pay for gifts in return for what was given on Valentine's Day. He could breathe out a sigh he wasn't troubled by that problem, at least.

Though these things were still a bit confusing as of late. There were certain moments he wasn't ready to bring up to himself. Valentine's Day especially so…that evening, being so close like that-swaying to the soft music under the brilliant moonlit sky. He had to steel himself and give himself more alone time than usual as of late.

How could he still be in pain, mourning yet feel that bit…hopeful? How could he feel he was able to manage his suffering day by day? Why was his heart beating frantically over the smallest, kind gestures from his housemate?

Nothing was making he was quite unwilling to try and understand himself. Still, isolating and brooding for too long wasn't helping matters either.

"Agh!" Kamui cried out in defeat. Okay. Maybe he is...attractive. He admits with of Subaru's angelically smiling face, and ethereal eyes when lingering over him come to mind. Understatement of the millennia. He groans burying his face in his hands. Being attracted to men was nothing new for him. Finding his housemate attractive was something most anyone could agree to. Keiichi had brought it up himself, but also said the same about Kamui.

Yet, he rarely got so attached. It's normal to think that though. Hell, even Sorata would say so. Sorata certainly had his heart set on Arashi so... I need to stop overthinking it. We see each other a lot more often. I'm just noticing more things I couldn't before.

Kamui fumbled with straps on his bag for a bit, before snapping it closed. The numbers on the clock told him he had well over an hour before needing to go to school.

His housemate disappeared moments ago up the stairs. Kamui's head could clear a little bit from the mess it's been in whilst alone.

Fortunately for Subaru, his endless list of mostly one-time clients and rather to the point method of working helped him to avoid unwanted admirers. Of course, those that did hold affection and admiration for him went entirely unnoticed anyway. Not having coworkers or classmates, he didn't have to haul around bags of return cookies or chocolates or whatever he would be obligated to give…

Kamui felt himself breathe softly through his nose. Relief flooded through his mind.

That's right. We're similar.

Subaru hadn't brought home nor accepted gifts Kamui was aware of. It was highly doubtful he was one to do so nor he would have time for exchanging pleasantries like that with those who were basically strangers.

So there weren't any gifts accepted of the romantic persuasion either.

That's how they were. Both knowing the pain lingering and aching from the men that stole and broke their hearts to pieces. They were prisoners to love, to fall in love deeply, only to be made to end the life of the ones they loved the most.

They shared a similar pain in that regard. So it's natural they'd have even more in common. A soft smile crept upon his lips as his mind wandered, today they shared something as well. Neither had to be wrapped up and get overly concerned over these holidays.

The sound of soft footsteps, ones Kamui's grown accustomed to walking down the steps reverberate.

Kamui turned back towards the other, feeling the rise in his cheeks. His lips curved up further, fuller.

"You're back," Kamui says, turning more fully from the couch. His eyes widen as Subaru steps closer.

"It wasn't exactly easy to hide these from you," Subaru lightly teases, stepping closer and handing Kamui a colorful bag tied up from one hand. The other present for Kamui becomes obscured by the back of the sofa.

"Sorry, I was cleaning our house yesterday," Kamui adds sarcastically. He rolls his eyes but the smile gives away his affectionate expression. The flushed young man accepts the gift gratefully.

Subaru flushed lightly, not terribly noticeable to Kamui. The latter was a little too focused on receiving whatever this was. Subaru looks over Kamui with a burning shine of longing. At the gentle smile directed his way, Subaru's breath hitches. His heart starts pounding like it did when he was a teenager. And all of this started because he had said it was our house. Subaru muses.

Well, it was their house which was thoroughly cleaned and cared for. Yesterday seems to be no exception. All of this leading to Kamui nearly finding the presents and surprises. Subaru took over, making Kamui protest that he truly wanted to relieve Kamui from his current work around the home. This offer, not uncommon but with more insistence than usual.

Kamui pursed his lips and raised an eyebrow, not quite convinced. Though eventually he did, nod and relent. Yes, he might have been swayed with gentle words and tender hands on his cheeks telling him to rest up.

Kamui takes a moment to look over the neatly wrapped treat bag on his lap. He felt his cheeks as they raised and reddened. Fingers clutch tighter around the gift, treasuring it.

Right… he did say he'd return the favor from Valentine's day…

Subaru looks quite flushed. It's something Kamui might have considered even cuter had his brain kept its ability to function just now. Finally, he takes notice of just what other surprise was to await him.

Subaru lifts the other gift for Kamui gradually. He holds back a soft chuckle, seeing Kamui's eyes rise wildly. The lovesick man moves closer to him and gingerly hands over a beautiful bouquet of white camellias, lilies, and roses.

Subaru turns around towards the front of the sofa, and sits right beside Kamui, as though it's his natural place. The flustering boy looks down at the bouquet cradled in his arms and against his chest. He can't argue with that sentiment.

"Happy White Day, Kamui," Subaru speaks softly, intimately. His voice only deepened at the use of his name, making Kamui start to shiver. Kamui looks up, eyes glossy and perplexed. Subaru's hand lovingly reaches to caress Kamui's cheek.

The younger male closes his eyes. He continues cradling the bag of presumed candies and flowers tighter.

When his violet eyes do open up they're greeted by sparkling gold and emerald orbs. A pretty face closer than before to his own. Ones that bore into him deeply.

Subaru can't fight the way his eyes brighten, and lips move to curl up and spread.

"Y-you didn't have to do this though...but of course I really am happy," Kamui begins his trail of words. He fidgets in his seat, before finally deciding to place the bouquet on his lap.

"I hope it wasn't a lot of trouble. I know you've been so busy lately." His fingers untie the gold ribbon from around the white plastic bag.

"I'll never be.. too busy for you," Subaru professes gently, mind in a dreamy state. He begins stroking Kamui's hot cheek. Though he burns up just as badly realizing his embarrassing admittance. Subaru clears his throat and follows up with. "You mean so much to me… Kamui."

For those words, Kamui indulges him. He leans forward, the flowers bristling against his stomach as he hugs Subaru quickly. His eyes are shining, and he feels trapped by the way Subaru's eyes hold him so dearly. Like he really truly was someone special.

"I really do…" The shy teen pauses, mouth dry, fingers nervously brushing the sides of his hair. "Care so much for you," Kamui professes sweetly, leaving the older man elated yet mixed.

Kamui caring for him made him very happy of course, but Subaru couldn't be entirely open with him in return. Still, he's omitting just how deep those feelings ran. Of course, he cares for Kamui. Adores Kamui. Keeps falling harder for Kamui. He's never felt this pulled to tell someone he loves them. His heart was torn between love and despair with Seishirou, not leaving much thought or time for affection. Subaru's heart had been sealed so tightly for such a long time. Now it felt ready to burst.

He seems to think about words for too long, worrying about the younger male. Not being entirely honest was taking its toll. He wanted Kamui to know more. But not now….it would complicate things, so he chooses to enjoy the joy Kamui's care brought him. His lips curl up softly.

Finally, he opens the treat bag. On the inside are several white candies. There's a mix of familiar candy brands, small pieces here and there. Though what makes Kamui beam foolishly is the most important part. Small square-shaped candies made of white chocolate are throughout the mix of brand-named treats. The broken-up candies vary in shape and size, some parts a bit broken off, chipped. All of which only adds to the homemade charm.

"You made these?" Kamui looked up towards Subaru.

"Mhmm," Subaru confirms with a nod. Gently the hand upon Kamui's cheek tangles in his hair. Violet-blue eyes flutter beautifully until they close. Kamui's lips keep curling up and out unsure whether to smile or pout as Subaru changes the touch to pat him on the head. And eventually retreats the hand from the already burning cheek.

Kamui takes a second to catch his breath. He tries one of the handmade white chocolates and indulges in the flavor. His eyes brighten at the sweet taste. It's very sweet, others might consider it too sweet, but it was hard to find something the older male did that Kamui wasn't fond of.

Then there are the flowers laying on his lap. Ones that are beautiful, sweet, and enchanting, much like the one gifting them. It's a little overwhelming.

A dizzied Kamui takes a moment to look the enamored older man up and down. Not that Kamui can decipher that feeling. He leans up so they're at face level. His eyes drift away for a moment to find courage.

"Thank you Subaru," Kamui whispers, face entirely flustered. His smile tightens so entirely shy and nervous, it melts the older man. He has to grip on the couch cushion beside him to balance. His free hand cups Subaru's cheek, turning him towards him.

Subaru is sure he can pinpoint the second his brain short circuits. Kamui's incredibly plush lips brush against his cheek. The one he adores is so close to him. It's a rare initiative of Kamui. The display of affection causes a spark. Both catch their breath for a second and look away.

The older of the two understood it quite well. At the least, he'd been more familiar with this feeling since admitting it to himself. Whilst this sparking feeling was quite unnerving, intense, and developing for Kamui.

They freeze for a moment drawn back to each other. Sparkling eyes entrance one another. Their lips part a bit, both a little dazed. Kamui leans up quietly. Their legs brush up against each other. Subaru looks at Kamui in wonder. The latter is actually the one moving much much closer.

The older male thinks of something to ask, but it's for naught. Kamui quickly squeaks and hurriedly whips his head back and down. There are signs of emotional distress drawing lines across his face. Panic takes over Kamui, realizing what he actually went and did. And whatever he meant to do just now.

Kamui chooses to take a moment of reprieve. His fingers retreat from the man's cherry red cheek and he brushes over the flower petals on his lap.

"You're always so kind to me, Subaru," Kamui trails off playing with the petals and leaves.

"Kamui you're…" Subaru's left breathless.

"Subaru?" Worry clouds beautifully adoring eyes.

Everything.

Subaru swallowed. Had Kamui's eyelashes always been that full? Were they always so alluring?

"You're so important to me," Subaru stumbles out words. Kamui is back to looking at his lap again.

"You too," Kamui replies quickly, before averting his gaze. It's a struggle to keep his eyes focused on the other. Things stir up and make Kamui's stomach lurch. A million emotions pull him every which way. He grasps Subaru's hand knowing all too well how pliant it was when they touched.

Kamui knows how well they connected. Simple yet affectionate acts of skinship. It's been their way of connecting since their first meeting.

"Are you working late today?" Kamui asks softly, entirely precious.

So, perfect. Subaru drowns in sparkling violet-blue eyes. The lights from above once again, reflect beautiful flows of white amongst the enchanting Watery orbs.

"I shouldn't be," Subaru is able to say. Though there wasn't a certainty in his line of work.

"Oh…"

"I'll make it back home as soon as I can."

"I know…"

"Kamui?"

"I hope I'm not sounding selfish …."

"You're not. "

"I just. I know how important you are to so many people, not just me. You help so many people, you're…" Kamui gushes, barely stopping himself from babbling on and on about all he liked and saw in his precious protector. "I don't want it to seem like I'm needy, monopolizing you…"

"You're not," Subaru assures, quick and to the point. He squeezes Kamui's hand tightly. His free hand reaches for one of the white roses. Kamui's eyes follow the movement as he removes one of the roses. His fingers elegantly trail down the stem, assuring it's clearance of thorns.

"Though I don't mind at all if you do," Subaru professes. He gently pushes back a few locks of raven-black behind the other's ear. Delicately the stem of the roses is placed to rest at a reddening ear. Kamui's breath hitches as he feels his stomach in knots again.

Kamui only nods for a moment. Mind going a bit too dizzy.

"Ah, c-can I ask you something?"

Subaru's eyebrows raise at that. He smiles, petting Kamui on the head. A nod follows.

"I ah… It's probably a stupid question…"

"Kamui."

"I'm not used to all of this. These holidays, actually attending school, having a regular schedule. All these events and I… wondered."

"It's really alright Kamui, you can ask me anything," Subaru prompts, brushing his fingers through Kamui's hair. The younger male almost pouts. It was frustrating how composed the other seemed! Subaru must know how those kinds of touches made it hard to think.

"Um like before… I don't know. I imagine you had a lot of admirers…" Kamui nods to himself, thinks over it. Recalls his protector's kindness and the way he shined as someone irreplaceable since their first meeting. His savior countless times. "Of course you would."

Subaru isn't sure what to make of that. His lips part slightly. He blinks several times, his mind goes foggy.

"Did you ever do this?"

"Do… What?" Subaru asks carefully.

"I don't know," Kamui groans in frustration. "The whole white day valentine's day thing? Did you receive lots of gifts, chocolates, and then… and then do the same in return?" Kamui finally finishes up. His legs press together shakily.

"Kamui," Subaru begins, there's heat forming in his eyes. Gold and emerald orbs only burn hotter, darken, as Kamui's cheeks dust pink once more. He lowers his hand to stroke Kamui's cheek.

"I didn't exactly have a regular school life either so there wasn't so much of that with classmates or anything... But I didn't have anyone I wanted to receive or give gifts to either, well aside from one's I'd exchange with my sister."

"I see," Kamui pauses. He purses his lips together seeing the bittersweet smile at the mention of his beloved twin. Though there is some light in his eyes at whatever memory came forth.

Subaru leans down. As they had done often enough, he presses their foreheads together. They rest upon each other. "So no, I didn't have someone I wanted to return gifts to either," Subaru pauses. Not to this extent. His eyes darted down to the beautiful bouquet.

"At least until now," Subaru finishes gently. Kamui can't fight the smile coming over his lips. The magnitude of what Subaru admitted doesn't quite sink in, delirious happiness and unexpected relief fill the younger male's mind. Quite satisfied with the answer Kamui gently places the flowers on the table before them. He grasps for the remote beside it, and leans back, resting his head upon the other's shoulder. Subaru hugs Kamui close, his hand at the boy's side.

They take a moment of comfortable silence before school and work take them away. For now, they can be close, not having to question why it came so naturally. Kamui picks a random TV program to play in the background, hoping it'll help his thoughts clear taking a break to ponder something else. Although it's hard to pay attention to what's on-screen.

---

Kamui is thankful while there are beautiful white roses and decorations, it's not as intimidating as Valentine's Day.

He gave out a few treats in return to his classmates and admirers who were genuine and didn't push their feelings on him. He felt it right to return gifts to ones who gave him chocolates or gifts out of kindness.

"This is so sweet, Kamui!" Yuzuriha exclaims. Her arms lift above her head to pull her friend into a hug.

Kamui huffs and shrugs it off. He wonders if he should be worried he's getting used to all of these hugs with his friends. It's still a little awkward feeling (save for with one person) but it wasn't bad.

Something about it all does make him reflect on his past. He envisions images of his two childhood friends as he looks up to the sky. Their beaming smiles when they were kids, gentle touches, and looks when he returned to Tokyo.

Then came loss. The image of his happy friends faded away, replaced by more gruesome images.

Then there's that small moment of reprieve. His first kiss…and then...

"Are you okay?" His friend asked, genuinely worried.

"Yeah, I'm alright," Kamui can't look the girl in the eyes. He takes a breath.

His friend looks skeptical at him for a moment. She takes out her phone and starts typing rapidly.

Kamui's eyes widen and he looks over her skeptically. There's far too much mischief behind his friend's smile. "What are you doing?"

"It's nothing!" She denies this. And grasps onto her friend's arm. "We still have some time for our lunch break though. Let's go see the garden!" She insists, hopes it cheers the boy up a little bit.

Kamui follows along, happy she is no longer pulling him along as they arrive at a colorful and serene field of flowers.

---

Evening

Kamui, rarely one to be home later than his housemate, was greeted by trembling and concerned eyes. Emerald and gold orbs glistened. Kamui noticed fragile lips parting to say something.

"Suba-"

Kamui yelps when he's pulled a bit roughly into a protective embrace. He hadn't time to leave the doorstep before his feet left the ground. Mind going dizzy, Kamui looks up with questioning eyes.

"I was worried," Subaru explains in a vulnerable, broken tone. Slowly he lowers Kamui's feet to the floor. His protector isn't one to let go that easily, as fingers tangled to the back of the younger male's head.

"I told you I'd be a bit late," Kamui professes, omitting the lie within.

I need to prepare for exams so I'll be home later.

It was only a few hours after his final class would end. Normally alright. Yet, not a single word came from Kamui after that time, even when trying to call him. His friends as well got in contact to ask if Kamui went home early. Those whom he was supposed to be studying with.

Earlier that day he received a bit of a worrying message.

Kamui seems really sad today. Maybe he'll talk more with you. He'll need some cheering up.

Subaru sighed, still stuck on the subway train between jobs at the time.

His lips did curve a bit at the last words.

It is White-Day after all so it seems fitting for you to do it.

If his thoughts weren't racing at the time, he would have flushed. Tried to brush things off or deny.

Guilt seeped in. Kamui knew something was wrong, Subaru didn't answer him further. He only tugged Kamui so he rested his head upon his chest. The younger male was made to listen to the skipping heartbeats.

"I know," Subaru professes, leaving the other lost. Kamui looks up and presses his hands against the older male's chest, attempting to distance himself from the embrace.

"That is what you told me," Subaru finishes, and Kamui shivers. Stubbornly his protector brings him right back where they started. Guilt within only amplified. Kamui felt his heart racing, anxiety going through the roof.

He knows… Kamui winces his eyes tightly shut. The usually steady heartbeat doesn't soothe him this time. He can still feel Subaru's heart speaking loudly. It does soothe when Kamui gives in. He rests his weary face against the warm chest.

"Although…" Subaru doesn't finish, doesn't need to. The final nail in the coffin came from the director's personal call.

Kamui missed his last classes. Something entirely odd for him since his first time enrolled. There was a place on campus close to the broken boy's heart. It wasn't hard for Imonoyama to track where he left.

"He's been at that place for a while now. I know he's been hurting. But it's unlike him to be absent this long... I'll let you make the call on this one, though you might want to consider picking him up."

And he did. As tough as it was, he knew Kamui needed his time, his space to grieve. Though he questioned his judgment as time went on.

"Subaru…" Kamui says weakly. His violet orbs tear up, lips trembling. "I…"

He can't finish it. Kamui gives in to comfort. Instead of running away from pain, he wraps his arm around the taller male's waist. Kamui holds him tightly, more so than he remembers ever doing to anyone in his life.

"Let's sit down…" Subaru advises, already leading them towards the couch. Kamui's vision is too blurry, he simply allows himself to be gingerly picked up and placed upon the cushions. He feels the other's weight dip beside him.

Kamui looks up too tired, weary eyes. His chest aches further. "S-sorry…" He whispers, shakily. Everything aches to the point where he can't think beyond the comfort. His hands tightly clench and curl themselves into Subaru's shirt.

Hot droplets of emotion stain his protector's shirt. Subaru pulls him closer, so Kamui is cuddled up to him. He buries his straining eyes into the crook of the other's neck.

"Kamui…" Subaru shushes the boy. He looks at him with shivering yet gentle eyes. His lips form a pained smile, and he lavishes Kamui's head with soft kisses, whispers of praise and adoration follow up. As much as he can express without admitting to those three words.

"I'm just glad you're alright," Subaru professes. Kamui feels a weight lifted, though is given little refuge. His heart aches for the raw pain he's been dwelling on. Looking up to see deeply caring eyes causes the dam to break.

Kamui cries out the other's name, in a mix of tears and sniffles. Tears only turn to more sobs, as he all but knocks the older man onto the couch. His slender form rests on top of. the other, his weight instantly accepted and embraced upon the other.

"It's alright," Subaru breathes out. His arms hug Kamui even more intimately. Hands brush up on the back of his head and lower back. Soothing circles on his back and combing gestures through his hair calm Kamui's breathing.

Patiently the older man waits for the one he loves to form words again. Whenever he would be ready, Subaru would wait. A few moments pass, painful as Kamui continues to cry and hideaway within the embrace.

"Subaru," Kamui whispers weakly.

"Hm," He acknowledges, shifts their position back so he can rest his head more comfortably against the pillow. Kamui falls back on him and makes use of the other's shoulder to bury his face.

"It's...been...h-hard," Kamui expresses, not bothering to look up or loosen his tight hold on the other's clothes for anything. He isn't asked to do so either.

"I know," Subaru gushes. He leans down and presses a lingering kiss on the crown of the other's head. "You've been going through so much, I can't begin to know your own pain." He speaks sincerely, even if they shared similar traumas, Kamui's was Kamui's own. Subaru would always respect that.

"I… Subaru-" Kamui glances up a bit. Violet-blue blue eyes blink tiredly. "H-how do you…" He stops frustrated, and twists his fingers further into the man's shirt. He buries his face deeper into his personal sanctuary.

"You've been so hurt too…" He says very hesitantly. "I… how have you…been able to keep going?"

The question doesn't fail to burn within Subaru's eyes. Life's traumas rush through his memory. Kamui is held almost painfully tight. Subaru had to stop the urge to shift their positions, pin Kamui down, and love on him until the pain subsided.

But he doesn't, could never allow himself to do something like that unless Kamui reciprocated it. Subaru settled for his arms tightening further around the other and squeezing him until there was no space between. "I'm not so sure I am managing," he laughs bitterly. Kamui nuzzles his face into the other's neck. It's the only thing he can manage, being held this tightly.

"But if I had to say a reason…" Subaru pauses. Knowing the words would be as good of a confession to anyone else. He brushes his lips wherever they can reach, falling to the side of the younger male's head. "It's because I have you here."

Kamui's eyes widen at the profession. A storm of tears started streaming again. "Subaru…" Kamui cries out his name. His breath quickens, his heart accelerates and his body won't let him move an inch.

Subaru's eyes flutter shut, allowing Kamui refuge. His hands moving soothingly up and down his beloved's head, back and sides.

He hushes and holds the smaller male against him until he hears his breathing still. Kamui falls asleep.

---

A good hour and a half pass by. When Kamui awakens, his weight lifts considerably. His violet eyes are red and puffy. He flushes at his vulnerability and the very warm body underneath him.

Oh… All he did earlier floods his mind.

"I'm sorry!" Kamui squeaks. He winced his eyes shut. Yet, the man he's been resting upon simply pets the top of his head sweetly. Subaru looks up with tired, gentle eyes.

"Are you feeling any better?" Subaru asks, looking over the other carefully. He stifles a yawn behind his hand.

"I… Ah… Yeah a bit," Kamui answers honestly. "It just hurts…some days I just-it's so hard to just keep going-"

"I know…" Subaru replies gently and combs his fingers through his hair. The hand gently glides through Kamui's raven locks, in a way they know the younger male likes. "Well thinking of my own situation… anyway."

Kamui nods and buries his face back into the wrinkled shirt.

"I'm sorry… I lied, worried you," Kamui apologizes softly, still hiding his face.

"You did," Subaru agrees, and hears a pained whimper against his chest. "But-" He curls his fingers under the boy's chin, making their eyes meet.

Both males have to take a breath, as their glistening eyes bore into each other. There's something incredibly strong at that moment they met each other's gaze. "I had forgiven you the second you walked through the door…"

Kamui's heart pounds wildly. His lips part left wordless, and without a coherent thought able to process.

"What matters to me," Subaru professes further, feeling Kamui's hands curl back into his shirt. There's something so right and a bit satisfying to know he's the one Kamui clutches on to. "Is that you're alright."

His eyes widen and his lips start parting and trembling. "Subaru…" He cries with overflowing violet eyes and goes right back to hiding his face. The older male allows Kamui to do as he pleases, to hide away from the pains of the world. Even if it's just a few moments.

Why are you always so kind to me? Kamui desires to know, yet feels overwhelmed with what he knows. He's not sure his heart can handle being treated so gently, hearing more words like that all at once.

After a long moment, Subaru lets out an elongated breath. "Maybe it's not the best to say now," He starts, feeling he'd only spoil this incredibly tender moment. Words are chosen carefully. "But you can talk to me about what's bothering you. If it Helps I can even go with you, next time you see them."

Kamui feels his chest tighten. He looks up to serious, glowing eyes, holding to him as though he were the rarest treasure in the world.

To see Kotori and Fuuma. Or more so… Pay their respects. Seek out some semblance of closure.

"I might… Take you up on that," Kamui decides. Subaru feels his heart murmur, being let in so closely.

"Okay," Subaru says. Feels Kamui cuddling close. Hands move to caress up and down the vulnerable boy's spine.

Kamui closes his eyes feeling soothed. Skilled hands go on to move up and tenderly ease tension in his beloved. Subaru massages one particular spot by Kamui's shoulders that makes him mewl.

Subaru can't look away, mind replaying that adorable sound over and over again. Kamui adverts his eyes and completely hides his face in the crook of his protector's neck. It takes at least five minutes before he can look back up.

"Kamui, I…" Subaru begins his words gently. Kamui partly looks up from his hiding spot. Though the follow up is interrupted by a loud gurgling sound.

The tension eases in the air before it dissipates. Subaru chuckles softly, and sits up, pulling Kamui against him once more. They share a tender look, hearts fluttering as they break out into soft laughter.

"I ah…" Kamui swallows, mouth only feeling drier. Gold and emerald eyes hold to him as though he were the only sign of light in a dreary world. Not entirely untrue.

"I should probably start on our dinner," Kamui attempts to excuse himself. His heated cheeks are cupped and made to look into darkened eyes.

"It's been a long day…Just Let me cook tonight," Subaru offers sweetly. Then an idea springs. "Or well I would like to take you out to eat if you're up for it," He offers.

"Now?" Kamui asks, feeling his cheeks warm up again. He

"If you'd like or tomorrow if that's better…" Subaru leaves it open. "I'd like to continue returning the favor. It is still White Day after all."

"You don't need to do that!" Kamui assures. I hardly did that much... He gasps feeling a finger to his lips. His mind shuts down momentarily.

"I want to," Subaru assures. "You prepared quite a bit on Valentine's day and my birthday I might add."

Kamui still looks up, a bit uncertain. Still a bit guilty for earlier. "But…" It's all he can manage in protest.

"Besides we haven't really had time to go out anywhere for a while now," Subaru explains coolly, outwardly at least. He feels some relief, the words come out smoothly. "So I'd like to take you somewhere." He fights off the voice in his head telling him he's practically asking Kamui out.

Kamui looks up at him for a moment. He studies the older man's elegant features. He smiles at the sight of sleepy eyes and a yawn.

Subaru's small private smile wins him over.

"Okay," Kamui returns the gesture.

---

Dinner

Being on White Day, there were a lot of couples walking hand in hand beside the pair. Subaru couldn't hide the smile creeping up his lips as Kamui still held onto his hand even while out like this.

A few heads turned in their direction. Most of which seemed out of curiosity or interest. It wasn't an unusual occurrence. Though it became more noticeable to the pair now that more eyes were not just on them as a pair, but focused on the other they cared so deeply for...Or loved beyond sense and reason, in Subaru's case.

This part of Tokyo seemed a bit of a better option. Several gay couples were amongst the groups openly, and the older man recalled this area to be a bit more popular amongst LGBT couples. At least according to a former client. Which they were not. Subaru would be pained to tell himself daily (even if he tremendously loved the thought of it).

Still being openly affectionate, even just holding hands, was nice. Even though Kamui seemed to care less at the gazes which followed him. He held Subaru's hand tightly as he pleased. Whether at his school or out in their not-quite-dates.

They agree to go down a quieter part of the street, avoiding people as much as possible. A quaint little restaurant, with the words "Sushi Koi" above, becomes their pick. Granted the pun made Kamui roll his eyes.

Subaru takes the initiative to step a bit forward, and open the door for the one he loves. He steps to the side and ushers Kamui in. He fights the amused little smirk down seeing how Kamui looks up at him curiously processing things.

"Thank you, Subaru," Kamui says very softly and nods up at the taller man. They shared a soft smile. He ducks his head down a bit, hearing soft "Awws" from an older couple walking by. Kamui had a feeling they didn't do that just for close housemates going out. His hunch was about to be confirmed.

"Such a sweet couple," An elderly woman hums softly to her own partner, walking by.

Subaru and Kamui both burn up, flushed dark pink. Amongst his fair features, it seems to contrast even more so. Kamui quickly retracts the hand that betrays his senses wanting to feel heated cheeks under his fingertips.

Neither can look at each other in the eye, yet still, Kamui can't help cool down. They both feel several gazes. Ones of envy, admiration for them as individuals, and them being here together. The shorter male grasps for Subaru's hand, a bit too nervous. He softly sighs when his hand is squeezed tightly, something is relieving about the touch.

"A Table for two?" Their server asks with a bright smile on her face. She glances down at the two and their joined hands. Only Kamui follows that look and the way her smile brightened as she looked back up.

Kamui figures Subaru must have acknowledged in some way. Her hand moves to a big sweeping motion. "Right this way," she walks on ahead cheerfully, "Would you like to have a table or a booth?"

"A…" Subaru pauses looking at Kamui. His eyes immediately go over towards the round booth they could both be close in. His heart flutters a bit at the idea. Though he doesn't press his luck.

He looks over to Kamui who very shyly ads. "A booth… Please," He glances up and about. He feels admiring glances towards how close they are.

"Of course," She responds sweetly, leading them to a very private booth near the back. One that can be assumed to be mainly used for intimate occasions.

Kamui partly realizes he makes the assumptions worse. Yet, he feels it a bit worse to let go of his protector's hand. Even if the latter might be mistaken for having quite another role in his life, it brings comfort.

The gorgeous pair of housemates certainly gain appreciative looks, many with the 'wrong' doesn't help that Subaru has always been so gentlemanly with him. Subaru patiently waits for Kamui to slide into the partly circular booth before him.

Very shyly he avoids all gazes on him. Especially the one that seems to effortlessly make his cheeks burn up. Kamui slides in and glances over to see Subaru joining him.

Kamui notices Subaru leaves a bit more space than usual between them. The former frowns a bit, not knowing what to make of it all. Subconsciously, he's found his way to sit right against the taller male. He feels their legs brush, which brings him back to attention. Subaru's eyes widen a bit before settling, he smiles gently. Their hands interlace under the table.

"It's quite a nice time to be close, what with how cold it's been lately," Their server adds on casually. Both Subaru and Kamui fluster a bright pink at the comment. Mouths feeling dry and hearts pounding in their ears, it's not easy for either of them to form some retort.

Even without seeing their joined hands, it's understandably easy to see how things got misread. A fond smile graces the server's lips. "I'll give you a minute to look things over. Can I get you started on some drinks?"

Subaru turns to Kamui first.

"I-I'll have sparkling cherry water," He stumbles out, eyes focused on the menu ahead.

"Ah, right you can make that two," Subaru responds, raising two fingers. He squeezes Kamui's hand tightly. Worry settles into those eyes as he notices Kamui's reactions.

"I'll be right back with your drinks," She announces and turns cheerfully on her heel.

When she is out of earshot, Subaru leans in. He softly speaks, "Are you alright Kamui?"

The smaller male nods vigorously. He still can't quite look back up. The pink flush darkens wildly as he feels fingers under his chin and tilting his head up. Subaru's cheeks nearly mirror the heat in Kamui's own. Something eases between them at the mutual sight. Though it leads to more unanswered and brushed off questions for later.

"I'm alright, Subaru," Kamui answers, looking into tender worried eyes that melt him to the core. "I… Ah...I guess I maybe made people get the wrong idea-" He stutters and keeps averting his gaze, the hand under his chin doesn't let him turn too far off.

"What are you talking about?" Subaru blinks. His eyes lower further, glossy with deep concern.

"I mean…" Kamui starts, feels his stomach lurching. Oh, God. Do I have to say this? "I-I was the one who k-kept - h-holding y-your h-hand like that…" He takes a quick breath, Why was it so hard to put this into words? Especially when the soft touches themselves came as naturally as breathing. He glances around the restaurant and whispers the latter. "Um... So it probably gives other people to think that we-we are…" Kamui can not finish, his voice turns softer and softer by the word. He stubbornly turns his head away.

Subaru gazes longingly over at the younger boy. His lips part as he processes the words. "I think I know what you're getting at," Subaru saves him from having to explain further. It fully clicks and he works on pushing the small smile down from his face.

"Does that bother you?" Subaru asks carefully.

Kamui looks up, eyes widening. "W-what?"

"Does it bother you if we're mistaken as being something more? because we are…" Subaru reiterates the question, searching for a word to describe them the best. Not wanting to push the other further. "Right now, quite close."

"I…" Kamui presses his lips tightly together. He makes a sound of frustration as he stays quiet looking down at his lap.

"I…" He takes a deep breath. "It's not like it's bothersome but… just all these looks are kinda embarrassing," Kamui admits, voice growing softer and softer. Subaru had to lean closer to catch the last words, which only darkened the flush on nervous cheeks.

"I see," Subaru says neutrally, there's a gentle smile on his lips. Tender dual-toned eyes glisten, holding Kamui's gaze, telling him no matter what he didn't mind. He looks down at their linked hands. "Do you want to… stop this for now?" He holds up their hands and slowly loosens the hold. Though leaves them close enough to return just as easily.

"No! " Kamui says quickly in distress. His lips tremble at the words. Even if it can be embarrassing… It's not like I want things to change, so long as he's alright too. He feels his hand go shaky and empty, at the lack of warmth. Kamui snatches Subaru's hand back

Subaru barely conceals a fond smile as his chest is throbbing painfully.

"I really don't… But I d-don't want it to seem uncomfortable for you-I just-I tend to do these things without thinking them through…" His voice comes out softly and a bit apologetic. "I don't want it to cause trouble for you," Kamui starts with a frown.

"It won't," Subaru assures quickly. In a smooth movement, Subaru grasps for one of the menus on the table and tugs Kamui up against him by the shoulders. He opens it before them and holds it before their close faces.

"I don't mind at all," Subaru professes sweetly. His eyes are overwhelmed with hot glows of love and his need for Kamui.

Soft pale-pink lips press to Kamui's forehead, as they naturally did. "I like being close to you," Subaru repeats an earlier confession of Kamui's.

"As long as you're alright, Kamui… I don't want to change this," He exudes the words amorously. His gaze meets with beautiful orbs of blue-violet and squeezes Kamui's hand for emphasis. He feels the heat below rising as he kisses Kamui's temples. "So as far as I'm concerned… Let them think as they like."

Kamui hesitates for a moment. He takes a quiet, but deep breath out. Something about the hand in his and the words make any eyes on him or words seem to fade.

"Okay, " Kamui finally agrees. Honestly, Kamui can't find a single part of him against staying this close to Subaru. They knew the truth, what was between them meant the world, beyond words. Even if it's a little embarrassing when others view that in quite a romantic tone… it wasn't something he wanted to change. Especially not for strangers.

Subaru gently lets down the menu hiding them away. Kamui keeps their hands locked, both are quite flushed, but something seems a bit more okay.

It doesn't bother him… Kamui ponders the words and feels deep relief. His lips creep up to a gentle curve. Subaru is incredibly kind.

Kamui thinks over this. Subaru's reassuring words earn him another opportunity for Kamui to slide close to him and cuddle closer to his side.

The soft handholds and closeness wasn't something really drawing negative attention. At least it was like that in this area. Gazes certainly being more on the admiring side.

This was nice. Both males decide upon this. Violet-blue orbs are helpless to fall deeper into the abyss of gold and emerald. There's a tender smile exchanged between them.

Somehow the tenseness and pain from earlier this evening was melting.

The two had ordered a variety of different sushi. Subaru reassures him again and again that prices were not an issue for Kamui to worry about, for him to get what he liked. A squeeze to Kamui's hand and the press of their foreheads starts. Subaru's expression is sweet but firm, his resolve not changing any time soon.

Reluctantly Kamui relents and ducks his head down as he orders. He's certain their server saw that little exchange. He mumbles out a few of his favorite sushi-rolls, and Subaru repeats them more audibly. Kamui can hear the amusement in his tone. He finds his affectionate protector to have a similar stubborn streak to his own. He can't find himself disliking the firm side of the older man. This goes especially so when he acts this insistent only to spoil him. Kamui can't help but feel a bit special beside Subaru.

"Beautiful…" Subaru calls absently, softly. Deep affectionate glow in darkening eyes. Kamui whips his head back up to meet a gentle gaze, soft-looking lips. He quickly shakes his head.

"What?" Kamui asks, a little weak. Subaru's eyes widened, as he's alerted to what he let slip out. In his defense, it was hardly fair for one person to look that much like an angel when they smile.

"The display," Subaru lies quickly. He's quite certain neither believes him. His words sound more like an endearment and less of a trivial comment on decor. Still, Subaru vaguely waves towards their table, with beautiful flowers centered within, to further his point. There is some truth, seeing the floral arrangement, and matching patterns on their bowls of miso soup.

"Oh, y-yeah," Kamui swallows, taking a breath to calm his stuttering. "It is…"

They're back to a somewhat awkward atmosphere by the time their meal arrives. They looked down and away at each other. It certainly raises confusion from their server who saw them cuddled up moments ago.

"Thank you," Subaru is first to recover, seeing long plates upon the table, each with their own garnished sushi roll. Small sides of wasabi and ginger are neatly placed at the edge of each plate. The tempura rolls themselves are nicely displayed with drizzles of brown or orange sauces.

The aroma from the food brings the flustered male to turn back up. Kamui's stomach gurgles again, as he feels hungry for the 'beautiful' new display before them.

Subaru chuckles at this, leading Kamui to slightly pout. They turn towards each other and laugh softly. Tension trickles away as they enjoy the rest of the meal.

---

Leaving the restaurant alerts Kamui to how cold it actually has gotten since they arrived. He feels it even through his jacket. He isn't one to press the issue, but the shivers, and rubbing at his arms becomes a dead giveaway. Subaru smiles softly and shrugs off his long coat. Soon enough Kamui feels a weight draped on his shoulders.

Kamui blinks several times. He looks up to see a tender expression that makes his knees buckle. The warm coat is guided to wrap und Kamui further. Kamui shyly takes it in his hands.

Subaru relishes in the way of the admiring looks of others around them, towards Kamui either stopped or turned sour. There was a bit of a rush knowing others saw the beautiful male was quite cared for.

"Thank you," Kamui expresses, looking down a bit. Bright violet eyes linger over their hands being laced together again. "But won't you be cold?" He looks up with shivering eyes.

Subaru shakes his head fondly. He feels his body heating up enough just at the sight of Kamui's slender form all wrapped up in his coat.

It wasn't exactly the first time. He hopes it's far from the last.

"I'll be just fine," Subaru assures. He shrugs, wearing a long-sleeved turtleneck underneath anyway.

It helped that he wasn't quite as sensitive to the cold. Certainly mastering his own spiritual powers came with balancing his own thermoregulation. Enough to be more than just fine to give his coat for Kamui at any given time. Or anything for Kamui, honestly.

Kamui nods at this bites his lip in the same way he always has. The nervous habit only serves to build up heat within the protective man.

The hand within Kamui's own is squeezed tightly. It's released causing the younger to frown and ponder protesting.

"Subaru?" He gasps before easing into the feeling of a familiar arm surrounding his waist. Subaru hugs him close to his side, soft warmth and silence exchanged for the short distance back home.

---

April

Snow melts away to make for beautiful spring flowers. That went even outside the CLAMP school.

It seems a surprising number of students shared a birthday on the 1st. Syaoran and Sakura were a pair that shared that same day. Shy love-filled smiles exchanged as they sat beside each other in class.

Kamui briefly saw the two in his classes. While he had hardly spoken to either of them, there was certainly something about the lovestruck students that made them shine. His late mother's words ring in his ears. 'Those who are in love often have a certain glow...making them shine brighter than ever before.' She had said though he never once saw said glow the few times she interacted with, and he saw his father.

Aside from the class couple, though Kamui knew quite a few students and seniors sharing the same birthday. Some of them clearly skipped out of classes, indicated by several empty desks in Kamui's English class. For the most part, students were quite studious and punctual, talking amongst their friends.

His home-ed class had a surprise planned for Kimihiro Watanuki, one who came on occasion as an assist, their instructor. The student was easy enough to talk with and certainly helped Kamui and Yuzuriha both with more complex recipes learned. It only seemed right that they'd present him with a personalized birthday cake and a few other treats for his birthday.

So there was excitement even for birthdays at this school. CLAMP academy seemed to love to celebrate just about everything.

Kamui ponders. With his birthday being in the summer, he never had to think about school then. Though it wasn't like he was exactly an honor student beforehand.

This Birthday… Maybe, will be quite memorable. He had friends who genuinely cared for him. He had his incredibly warm and kind housemate, who promised to keep the day free for him. Something no one had done before, usually not even noticing his birthday at all. The pressure of his destiny outweighed any simple celebrations.

Kamui looked outside the window, his chin resting on his palm. His eyes became entranced by the beautiful grassy and blossoming gardens. Something he enjoys seeing both on and now off-campus. Blossoming plants and flowering trees around his and Subaru's home, it's nice.

The weather is warming up, sunlight breaks through to the window. Something about this season brings out a feeling of hope.

---

"Pleaaaase!?" A shrill cry emerged. Kamui had to cover his ears with his hands.

The introvert amongst his two boisterous friends left him fatigued. He sighed, gripping tightly to the small gaming controller in his hands.

"No," Kamui deadpanned.

"But why not?!" Yuzuriha stood up firmly, jostling her precious dog. Though only two of the room's occupants can see it.

"You know why," Kamui put out simply.

Keiichi had been sitting on the couch, feeling he was made into a mediator. One could hardly tell from the current conversation the two teens were responsible for the world and humanity's future.

His ever cheerful smile was present but he could feel some unease. His lips pursed tightly as he clasped a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"I would like to see your home as well Kamui," Keiichi started softly, there's a tinge of sadness behind it. "If it's alright," He finishes a bit sadly.

Kamui feels a pang in his chest, guilt seeping in. His friend has been kind enough to invite him to meet his mom, for what may have been the final time either saw her.

"It's not like you both can't come over," Kamui starts hesitantly. He ducks his head down and avoids the overly enthused gleam in his friends' eyes, Yuzuriha more so than the other. A feline grin spread over the girl's face. "Just… it doesn't have to be while Subaru's back," Kamui names his condition.

To no surprise, both of his friend's earlier faces fell. Kamui avoided the puppy-dog eyes from Yuzuriha.

She huffed, her eyebrows scrunching up, and placed her hands on her hips.

"And why not? Subaru's my friend too!" She protests, leaving their mutual friend to wave his hands between them. He looks back to the screen, the kart-racing game put on pause for quite some time.

"You have ulterior motives," Kamui argued sternly.

"Ah!" Yuzuriha huffs. The short-haired girl holds a hand to her chest in mock offense. Her arms folded under her chest before falling back into her seat. "I do not! Why can't I see my two friends?! After all, we all were involved in-"

Kamui makes a cutting motion with his hand before his neck. Yuzuriha quickly stops herself, turning to look at the perplexing brunette, oblivious to what really tied his friends together in the first place. If possible it would be kept that way.

"Well, we are all friends!" She argues once more. Kamui looks sympathetically at Inuki, attempting to snuggle up to his owner who can't keep still for the life of her.

"I would like to see him again too," Keiichi chirps in thoughtfully. "It's been some time, and I am curious to see what your home looks like." He mentions gently. "And I won't ask him anything personal. I know how much you care for each other and need privacy."

Kamui flushes a deep shade of pink. The words were comforting on one hand. Yet, on the other hand, it just made the already blurry relationship even more so frustrating.

Still, it was hard to argue with sincerity like that. His friends were genuinely kind even if they were a bit too insistent on certain topics.

"Maybe… "

"Yay!" An exclamation comes from the starry-eyed girl beside him.

Kamui glares her way, not at all surprised by her words.

"Now we can see your love nest~" She teased, leaving a mortified Kamui. It doesn't help matters when he only reddens, feels so much heat from the words and implications.

Which shouldn't even be a thought!

"A definite maybe in your case," Kamui mumbles under his breath. Grasping for his friend's controller and pressing the + symbol, starting up the race a bit early and leading his two friends behind him.

"Hey! That's not fair!"

---

"So… That's it…my friends were very insistent! They really wanted to come over and watch a movie or something…" Kamui grumbles out glaring down at the table in front of him as though it caused the problem. "Again! It was Yuzuriha's idea!"

"Is that so?" Subaru laughs softly. He reaches his hand across the table, brushes his fingers over Kamui's clenched hand.

"But uh…" Kamui hurriedly adds in and keeps his gaze down. Thankfully not noticing dual-hued eyes glossing over and all but devouring his flustered face. "Of course, if it doesn't work out I understand. Whether it's the time or…" He mumbles the last part. "In general…it's okay. " He tries not to look too hopeful, eyes on the dinner plate below.

Maybe, Subaru will be against it. Or have to work all day anyway.

Kamui's fingers fumble with the edge of the tablecloth. He shyly pulls his hand back to his lap, missing the pout on the other's lips.

"I don't see a problem with it," Subaru says simply. He twirls his fork into pasta and presses it to his lips. He lingers on the taste staring longingly at Kamui.

"You don't?" Kamui says a bit anxiously. He presses his lips together, unknowingly licking at the seam.

"Not at all, they're your friends," Subaru ads with assurance. Not mentioning the tiniest tinge of envy said friends got to spend more time with his beloved lately than he did.

Kamui had good friends that cared dearly for him. That was what had mattered.

"Besides it is your home as well," Subaru mentions warmly.

"I know…" Our home… Kamui finally looks up, meeting tender gold and emerald eyes.

"Then feel free to have them over," Subaru says. One of his hands moves under the table clenching slightly. He wouldn't have Kamui alone to himself for their movie night, cuddling close on their couch. Though he notes to plan one soon.

"O… Kay," Kamui says reluctantly.

"So is there a day you have in mind?" He asks, generally curious.

"Um… on Friday after school," Kamui mutters. "But if that day isn't good I-"

"It's fine, Kamui," Subaru says smoothly, despite his racing heart as he reaches for the other's slender hand and links them together. "I will be working a little bit late…" He expresses.

"That's alright, " Kamui ducks his head down and hides the relief in his eyes.

"But I should be back around 8," He finishes, leaving Kamui's eyes wide open distraught.

"Ok… They both did want to see you again…." He says meekly, finding it way too hard to focus, what with Subaru's thumb moving to caress the top of his hand. The older male debates kissing Kamui's hand or not. Something about the feeling of their hands linked always comes off so right.

While not a first time thing, he couldn't guarantee it wouldn't make him more obvious than usual. And it likely would just make him start craving more and more of Kamui.

"Then it's settled," Subaru says amicably, he settles his thoughts squeezing the other's hand tightly. Their hands stay clasped for a few moments.

"Okay, well we should probably finish your dinner… Before it gets cold I mean…" Kamui professes clearly embarrassed, gently unclasping their hands.

Subaru is rewarded with a deeper more beautiful blush as he smiles tenderly towards his heart's unknowing keeper.

---

Movie Night

The sound of the doorbell sends Kamui's mind into a frenzy. Looking up at the clock on the far wall, it's around 6. Definitely too early for his housemate, so that was still on schedule. Then the sounds of idle chatter and laughter outside his door gives it away.

Kamui's eyes rose to see a very luxurious looking car pulling out of the driveway. Yuzuriha caught the look and proceeded to explain.

"When the Director heard I was going off-campus tonight he booked a personal driver for me," Yuzuriha explained simply enough, her eyes sparkling. "They even had a TV in the back and desserts and drinks…." She trails off.

Kamui shook his head a bit. Well, it seemed Nokoru was ever chivalrous and indeed had a soft spot for truly every female on campus. Though Keiichi came along as well, so it seemed like it ended up working for both of them.

"I was fortunate enough to be around at the time to come along," Keiichi confirms his involvement.

"That's good then," Kamui turns to the short-haired girl. He briefly glances at the colorful cat-themed backpack. One that assumed to be holding her gaming console and maybe movies as well. It certainly seemed new but very fitting for his friend.

Kamui looked down fondly at the spirit-dog beside his friend. He always seemed so protective, and naturally in sync with whatever his energetic owner and friend were up to. He stops halfway leaning down to go and pet Inuki. The gray wolf-like dog decides to cuddle up to his owner's legs.

It seems those chosen for the promised year were still the only ones who could see him.

"Your home with Subaru is so beautiful!" Yuzuriha complimented, her eyes glossy and starry.

Kamui huffed, catching the added words easily enough.

Thankfully, their mutual friend went on as a mediator. "Thank you for letting us come over Kamui," He expresses to his friend.

"Right! So let us in already!" Yuzuriha doesn't seem to savor the moment. But Kamui can tell she's only teasing as she steps over the threshold.

Keiichi quickly shuffles out of his shoes and places them neatly by the door.

The cheerful girl plops down to sit, taking her time to unzip and untie short white boots. It seemed to match well enough with the brightly colored skirt and flowery blouse.

Kamui is reminded it is Friday as he looks at them both in more casual wear. He himself had barely remembered the change out of his uniform moments ago.

"Subaru isn't here yet?" Yuzuriha stands back up, loosely places her shoes down beside the other pairs.

Kamui isn't sure whether he sighs in relief or disappointment.

"No, he's working later today," Kamui explains stepping to the side and letting his friends look around the expansive living room. One that he hadn't gotten to spend more than five minutes in this morning with his precious housemate

"Aw, that sucks! You must really miss him then!" She exclaims a bit dramatically. Yet they all know Kamui can't deny it for the life of him.

"Well, yeah…" Kamui admits abashedly. He shakes it off quickly. "But I get it, and he'll be back around 8 or so…" And it was helpful and kind of cute, to Kamui how his protective housemate texted him regularly throughout the day. He felt his cheeks heat up, recalling several sweet messages complimenting Kamui for how hard he worked at school. Sometimes he'd go on about how sweet Kamui was to him, and how wonderful the lunch Kamui made for him had been.

"That's good then. I'm really happy you both have each other," Keiichi smiles earnestly. Kamii can tell there's something else meant to be added after. Though it's hard to act neutrally when he knows his friend well enough and their antics. The brunette beside him stays quiet for a moment before redirecting towards the TV.

"So should we set up? I brought over a new fighting game I got last week!"

"That sounds good," Kamui says softly. He eyes the kitchen in the corner, he vaguely gestures towards it, his friends hooking up the cables for the console. "It's pretty simple. I did put in a pizza a few minutes ago," He mentions.

"Oh, thank you!" Keiichi chirps up, looking a bit hungry as he looks back at the kitchen. One which until now Kamui had prepared meals for just himself and Subaru. Though there was something nice about doing so with friends as well.

"We brought a lot of popcorn and candy for movie night!" Yuzuriha chimes in pulling out various treats from her colorful cat devoted backpack.

"We have some here too! Although with you we might need to combine," He jeers towards his friend. Knowing her love for sweets and various snacks.

She stuck her tongue out childishly, before mock glaring at her friend. They looked towards each other with stern expressions. Quickly enough it ended with them breaking into laughter.

His friend went towards the console, clicking off the small controllers on its side. She gave two of the controllers to her friends and had the player 1 controller for herself.

Kamui sighed as he went to sit back on the sofa. A little fondly, a little sadly he remembered playing games with Kotori and Fuuma. How smaller versions of himself and Kotori used to always pair off to work on a team. Sure enough, Fuuma would tug Kamui's hand, smiling so warmly. "I want Kamui as well," he would insist, leading his sister to pout.

Looking back now it should have been more obvious. It wasn't just Kotori who felt that strongly. Kamui can almost see as he'd be tugged to rest his back to the other's chest. Small thin legs were essentially straddling Fuuma's lap. Nothing was considered off. That closeness felt right... The older boy would hold his hands over Kamui. All to 'teach' Kamui new combos, certainly not just to hold his hands. Kamui never once questioned it.

His friends took their seats beside Kamui. He was brought back present seeing a hand wave in front of his face.

"Are you alright Kamui?" Both friends call out to him when he finally comes back down to earth.

"I… Yeah, I guess I zoned out a bit there," He ducks his head down and mumbles an apology.

"It's not a problem, just don't feel you need to keep things inside, I'm happy to listen," Keiichi offers, kindly gently squeezing Kamui's hand. The latter was made to realize once more how different such a simple touch felt affected him. All of which depended on who that person was.

"Same with me! I really don't like seeing you so sad like this," Yuzuriha admits, lips curling down, unusual to her. That's probably why I like seeing you with Subaru. You smile so much when you talk about him. She thinks softly.

Her spirit dog whines softly, seeing his owner quite deflated, he rests his muzzle on her knee. Occasionally, he nuzzles until he feels his human's hands petting him with reassurance.

"Thanks…" Kamui mentions softly. He grasps to hold his controller better in his hands. "I'll be alright." he expresses lips turning to a smirk. "Especially after I win this round!" He mentions beginning to scroll through the selection screen of fighters.

---

The evening went over quite well. Surprisingly, Subaru hadn't come up as often as he predicted, though there were a few teasing words that were exchanged. Kamui knew he'd' been caught smiling dreamily at the incoming messages on his phone.

Still, it was nice, and the homemade pizza came out as planned and learned in Although Kamui did feel a tightness in his chest when he finally heard the key turning in the lock.

Yuzuriha grinned at him with a Cheshire-cat smile which had become her own signature look. At least it was so when she had a mischievous us glint in her eyes.

"Your boyfriends home," She teasingly whispers to Kamui.

"He's not!" Kamui hisses in protest, eyes turning to an icy glare. It can't last when the feeling of his protector near melts him. He flushes red, quite mortified at the thought of his housemate overhearing. Still, though, Kamui is already on his feet again and heading towards the door. Keiichi looks towards Kamui with a sympathetic smile.

Kamui looks back quickly. "Don't even think about saying that around Subaru!" He warns with an icy glare. Yuzuriha rolls her eyes, her friend was already right before the door to greet his housemate he supposedly held only platonic feelings towards.

"I'm not planning to, you can relax," She expresses, mocking offense, her arms folding under her chest. "You're more fun to tease on your own anyways~" the cheerful girl ends in a sing-song voice.

Though of course, Kamui isn't responsive. She snorts and Keiichi has to suppress his knowing smile.

Subaru can't hide how he beams, seeing the knob turn fully, like a puppy waiting for his owner to return. There is no hiding the way violet-blue eyes light up at the sight of a tired, slightly disheveled Subaru. Those same eyes soften seeing the older man suppress a yawn behind his hand.

"Kamui," Subaru greets him warmly, feels his stomach do flip flops at the soft violet-blue orbs brightening. Subaru quickly looks down at his watch then back to his most important one. "Ah, I guess I was back later than planned."

Kamui shakes his head. "I'm just glad you're back."

"I missed you," Subaru hushes. His voice breathes the words, coming out soft and intimate for only Kamui to hear. His hand gingerly brushes a few misplaced locks behind his ear. In a fluid movement that same hand brushes by and briefly holds to a heated cheek before retracting.

"I…" Kamui attempts to respond. Though he sees a beautifully amused smile on the other's lips before being pulled close. Kamui only yelps at how easily he moved in those protective arms. There's something extra protective in his embrace today.

"I'm home, Kamui," Subaru whispers into Kamui's reddening ear. He shivers in those arms being pulled tightly close. Both flush from the proximity alone and the way their eyes seem to always meet and fall into each other. As though they've known each other through countless lifetimes and worlds.

"Ahem." The sound of an awkward voice comes out, with throat clearing. Effectively popping the bubble the not (quite) boyfriends became lost in.

This time both Subaru and Kamui are equally flushing crimson. They part from the embrace awkwardly and look away from each other. Hearts race wildly, Kamui can't make out what's said after.

"S-sorry," Kamui expresses. The very shy student turns back to see his friends. Yuzuriha looked at him with mirth, he had been caught. Or what it would seem to her.

Keiichi looks sheepishly, a tad guilty for interrupting the little reunion. Although, it felt a little too private to be around.

"Ah, Nekoi. Segawa," Subaru slowly recovers, smiles and nods at each of their guests. A polite smile graces his lips. "It's good to see you both again." A hand is extended.

"Same here, it's been quite a while," Keiichi responds in kind. He takes the older man's hand and shakes it strongly.

Yuzuriha giggles. She gives the taller male a brief hug. "You don't need to be so formal. Just Yuzuriha," She insists firmly. Something about her ever bubbly tone and smile, makes Subaru think of a younger Hokuto.

"Right," Subaru trails off a bit awkwardly. Even if they were both Dragons of Heaven, Subaru couldn't say he found himself particularly close with anyone, save for Kamui, of course.

"Was work alright?" Kamui feels pressed to ask, seeing tired eyes avoiding his own. Though something darkens, pains at the question.

"It was…" Subaru pauses and stops himself. "I still have a bit of work to get done, but I should be out soon," He says vaguely. The reserved man excuses himself.

Kamui quickly runs up to him. He grabs onto Subaru's arm and holds it sweetly.

"Did you eat yet?" Kamui asks, looking to the gold and emerald eyes for truthful answers.

"I'll get to that after-"

"There is some homemade pizza left. But I can make something else if you want."

"It's alright, Kamui. I want you to have fun with your movie night. I will be out as soon as I finish a few reports for today."

"Alright," Kamui relents a bit and pouts slightly seeing Subaru walking back towards the stairs. "I'm going to come to get you if you're in there too long," Kamui assures.

Subaru reaches his hand out affectionately petting the boy's head. Subaru carefully glances down to see Kamui's friends watching them with interest. There's a moment of silence. Kamui steps up close to him.

The protective man smiles with adoration at the boy. Though those gold and emerald eyes are a bit red fatigued and hints at a bit of pain.

This was usually the moment where Subaru would close the distance. He does lean closer. And hugs Kamui tight looks at the younger male as though his entire world was right there within his arms.

Yet, soft lips don't press upon his temples nor the top of his head. He is squeezed tightly in the hug before being let go. A solemn line replaces the beautiful smile Subaru formed around him.

Something aches terribly in Kamui as they part. He watches the older man walk up the stairs, clearly, bothered by something from today.

It shouldn't bother him, yet Kamui is forced to admit something terrifying. He had grown quite accustomed to that affection. Kamui wanted Subaru to kiss him as he usually did.

Those innocent kisses…

Even if the kisses were only on the head or forehead. Even if they were only displays of affection between close friends. Even if it was frustrating and embarrassing, he felt a longing. Those touches were special between them, and only them.

It felt wrong to not have that closeness, for Subaru to maybe even shut him out? He could feel something a bit amiss.

Subaru I… Kamui's brain feels itself in disarray, he shudders. Still, he couldn't deal with this right now. If Subaru needed time to work and unwind that was alright. Plus it wouldn't be fair to his friends. He sighs and attempts to force all of this down.

Kamui finally turned around. He walked over towards the couch in a bit of a daze.

Both of his friends turned towards him with sympathy.

"You okay?" Keiichi's eyes are glistening with distress.

"Kamui if you need to you can-" Yuzuriha starts.

"No, I'm fine!" He attempts to shake the look of misery on his lips and forces a half-smile. "I'll go make some popcorn," Kamui hurriedly excuses and rushes into the kitchen. He had to compose himself and going to Subaru right now might bring those same thoughts to the surface.

---

"Ugh, just go see him already!" Yuzuriha exclaims with frustration.

"It's fine," Kamui lies horribly, voice dripping with sadness. "I want to have our movie night and he said he will be out."

"If you say so…"

Keiichi sitting beside him on the couch clasps a hand on his shoulder. "You're important to him, whatever is wrong I'm sure you'll be the first one to open up to."

"Thank you," Kamui professes and whispers an inaudible "I hope so." He can feel the warmth in his friend's voice and confidence.

"I-I might check on him in a few minutes though" Kamui does finish off, worries taking over.

"If nothing else, to bring him some food to eat. It's not good for him to skip meals." Kamui says to himself, a bit absently. Realization dawns he let his thoughts slip out. He finds his cheeks would be burning for the majority of the night.

"Fair enough," Yuzuriha settles and presses down on the remote, starting up the anime film. Emotional music starts playing on the TV. Which only escalates Kamui's brooding

It didn't help that the movie featured a BL romance, and the main actor looked a tiny bit like Subaru.

Though Subaru is much more… Kamui curses his own thoughts, the way he feels his cheeks aching from smiling like this. Yet, he can't seem to suppress the lingering thought. Beautiful.

The brooding male sighed for the nth time that evening. After, few moments of emotional dialogue the very much so established movie couple were, cuddling in bed. He feels himself burning even up to his ears. It is not like it had to be exclusive to couples.

Though the way they held each other was quite commonplace for Kamui and his bedmate.

His mind couldn't stop drifting to that first night Subaru brought him home. How painful that day was, how much of a mess he had been. So broken and ready to just give up.

Yet… once more he was brought back. Subaru held him so tightly that night. And countless nights to follow. Nothing about it felt anything but natural…Still, he shouldn't be going down this road. He can't! It's not like his heart had even been put back together.

Finally, Kamui stands up. "I'll be right back."

"Have fun with your Subaru~" Yuzuriha teases. Kamui rolls his eyes, his face not cooling off from his earlier thoughts.

The flustered male is quick to grab a plate. He heats the homemade pizza in the microwave and adds some fruits and carrots on the side for some balance. With his line of work. Subaru needed all the nourishment he could get. Maybe Subaru was just overwhelmed with work, but still, there was something. He feels it.

Kamui heads up the stairs, hoping for the best.

The worried boy walks up the staircase quickly. He knocks a few times on the door beside the shared bedroom.

"Subaru?"

"You can come in," Subaru calls for him, feeling the other's presence instantly.

Kamui hesitantly turns the knob, closing the door behind him. "Subaru?"

To his dismay, Subaru's eyes are on the computer screen ahead of him.

"I brought you dinner," Kamui tells him gently. He walks over and places the plate on the computer desk. "It's not good to skip. It… makes me worry."

"I'm sorry…" Subaru expresses sincerely yet entirely exhausted. He leans back and starts rubbing at his temple with his index finger and thumb.

Subaru doesn't stand up though and closes the distance. When he looks over to Kamui he weakly smiles, looking a bit pained at whatever he had been working on. He doesn't tug Kamui until they flushed together, and doesn't place innocent kisses on the shorter boys' temples. His eyes keep shifting to the now silent keyboard.

"I will be fine though," Subaru says unusually distant, his mind drifting. He doesn't respond until Kamui brushes a hand upon his cheeks. Finally, Subaru turns back, there's a depth of sorrow within those eyes.

"I know you're not when I asked about work earlier you just.." Kamui goes off on this and sees the older man wince again. Kamui holds a comforting smile on his lips, violet-blue orbs brighten. "You can talk to me…"

Subaru only shakes his head.

"I'll be down in ten minutes-you should go have fun with your friends."

"I can't when I'm worried about you!" Kamui's eyes start burning up. His hands are shaking. He only realizes now how his frustration with this just leaked.

"Please, Kamui... You don't need to."

"But, Subaru!"

There it went again.

"Please… I just need a few more moments, then I'll take a break," Subaru turns back towards the screen before him. Subaru's words come out so broken, soft, and fragile. Kamui feels his heart crack.

Kamui stops arguing, his lips curl down. Glistening violet-blue eyes are shaky and pained. He feels Subaru placing his hand on top of his own.

"Just a few moments?"

"I promise," Subaru nods, squeezing the hand on his own before letting it down gently.

"I… if that's what you want then," Kamui reluctantly turns to leave with crestfallen lips. He makes it to the door. It was up to Subaru what he wanted to do and say. Still, not being able to do more..actually hurt.

Kamui turns back once more to Subaru, forcing a half-smile. Though looking back once more they start to truly see each other in their eyes. The spark ignites and their eyes fall into each other. The thought of moving any further away becomes ludicrous.

Kamui's trembling eyes breakthrough Subaru, hurting him more than his earlier worries had been. That violet-blue he could spend a lifetime diving into, they were hurting. He was the one causing this hurt.

"Kamui?" He's a bit relieved to see Kamui waiting patiently by the threshold.

"Please…" Subaru beckons him with a wave of his hand. "Come here."

Kamui steps forward, hesitant, and complies. His cracking heart from earlier starts its own repair as those strong protective arms grab for him. Finally, holding Kamui again, he breathes out.

"I… It was a harder day at work than I expected," Subaru says. Not like there were easy days, but it couldn't help but get to him.

His client having to part with the one he loves most-unable to hear the pained words in return. His soulmate, now gone from this realm…

It genuinely hurt… tears and desperate cries… still ringing in his ears.

The fear of losing someone he loves again took over his current thoughts,

"You can talk to me…" Kamui assures him once more as he hugs the older male tightly back and kneels on either side of Subaru's legs. Arms wrap tightly around his protector's shoulders as they settle, neither can look away.

Kamui's light-weight settles so naturally on the older man's lap. Subaru hugs him warmly and leans his head down just a bit. It had been a long day with work. The tired onmyouji buries his face in Kamui's neck, feeling the full-body shiver against him. Thankfully for Kamui's embarrassment, he is not quite in the state of mind to look into it, just how sensitive Kamui's neck was.

They stay close together. Kamui brushes the taller male's hair with his fingers. Soothing lines and zig-zag run down the raven locks.

It's moments before he responds to Kamui's offer.

"I… I know, we can talk about it later," Subaru starts a bit shakily. Kamui links their hands tightly.

"I want to," Kamui insists, stubbornly. This side of Kamui brought out a laugh.

"But… After your friends get back home," Subaru reminds and squeezes the hand in his own.

"Oh!" Kamui blushes pink, again remembering his friends were very much downstairs. He was very much in Subaru's lap. This time by his own stubborn actions to keep his precious protector looking at him.

He scrambles off the other's lap, tries to force down the heat he feels in his stomach. Kamui hops off and extends his hand.

"Come with me? You could use a break right?" Kamui's voice is tender, violet eyes sparkling beautifully. There's no choice for Subaru to do anything but surrender.

Subaru does indeed take his hand, but only to pull it forward. He kisses the top of Kamui's hand languidly, nearly making Kamui stumble.

His mind brings up the image of a knight bowing his loyalty, protection, and in this case affection.

"Su-Subaru?" Kamui stutters, not calming nor able to look away from the gentle lips on his skin.

"Alright," Subaru says, despite pulling the one he loves intimately close in one more embrace before heading back down.

---

Pure amusement. That's the only way to describe the bright-eyed look of Kamui's friends as they saw the pair walking down the staircase.

Kamui kept his head down, knowing what those looks were about. Subaru seemed to have somewhat of an idea, but neither bothered to hide or unclasp their hands.

"You're back," Keiichi beamed, a bit brighter than usual. His smile settled to one more gentle, seeing Kamui and Subaru exchanging private little glances; their fingers entwined.

"Come over here! We even made a new bowl of popcorn!" Yuzuriha chimes in and waves her former seals over. And the array of boxed candies were sprayed out before where Yuzuriha sat.

Speaking of which. All too conveniently the sofa was perfectly open. Whereas the chairs on either side were occupied by his friend.

A pained grimace spread over the shy teen's lips. He takes Subaru's hand whilst down the stairs and leads him towards the couch.

There's an air of awkward silence as they sit down with matching flushed cheeks. There's a bit of muffled giggling and gazes right at them. Kamui grasps for the bowl of popcorn. He places it in a little space between himself and Subaru.

The older male takes the bowl between them and scoots a bit closer, as per usual. Yet somehow things felt more intense. Maybe it was their additional guests who already had the wrong idea. Kamui kept his gaze down and turned to the paused TV screen.

"What movie did you decide on?" Subaru asks curiously. Kamui sat back a bit more comfortably, lifting his legs upon and towards the side of the couch.

Thankfully, the question does shift the attention off of himself and his special person beside him.

"It's one of the new anime movies which came out! Called Before the Sunrise. Kinda like an action/fantasy," Yuzuriha explains and turns to Kamui, making sure he looks her in the eyes. "And a bit of a romance~"

Kamui debates his choice of friends at the moment. Or at least the invitation here.

"I ah… I can catch you up on the movie," Kamui says in a hushed tone and turns on his side slightly. He doesn't bother to look and see his quite satisfied friends watching him get closer to the person he cares deeply for.

Subaru hums in acceptance of the idea. His hand rests on Kamui's hip as Kamui shifts his sitting position and curls closer.

"Ah, b-but play the movie now. I've made you wait long enough," Kamui suggests with a slightly apologetic tone. Flustered, he looks away and keeps waving his hand forwards and towards the screen.

"Okay~" Yuzuriha chirps out, feeling quite satisfied with how the two were already so close. Lines blurring regarding exactly what was between them. Yet, her friends looked happy. She finally pressed the play button on the remote.

Kamui gently placed his hand beside Subaru's neck. He leaned in close, eyes fluttering, entrancing gold and emerald. The older male blushes beet red, only seeing Kamui nervously press closer. His lips part, seductive to the older man, and nervously to Kamui, before he licks them. The warm breath against his ear, makes Subaru nearly fall back on the couch and likely bring Kamui back with him.

"So basically…" Kamui whispers, summarizing the bare bones of the movie plot. It deemed his turn to become a flustered mess, as he attempted to skid away from talking about the sappy romance scenes. Ones he might have liked.

Dual-toned eyes followed his crush's lips especially honing in when a small tongue pushed put to lick them. Subaru took his word for how the story went. Kamui's red cheeks, and ears were a good indication he left some parts out. The sight never failed to leave a pool of heat simmering within.

Still, Subaru listened quietly and attentively. "I see…" He breathes out, and turns his head. So their noses are close enough to brush.

"Yeah… Well… ah," Kamui nervously swallows. "th-that's it for the most part," Kamui can't keep his eyes in one place, slowly pulls away. He bites at his lip, keeps his gaze towards the screen, only to redden further at the prolonged kiss scene.

The shy student would have to talk to his friend about this particular movie choice. The moment seemed to go on for ages on screen. He felt a strong gaze on him, the scene got a bit more intimate, making him brush his legs together, hoping no-one especially not the man beside his would see that.

Not bothering to look up, he misses the look on Subaru's usually calm face shift to one more heated, and untamed. Gold and emerald eyes darkened, cloud with desire. Subaru fought off the powerful urge to carry Kamui back upstairs and ravish him into sweet oblivion. If they were alone if Kamui was his, If Kamui felt it too... Gods, he knows he wouldn't stand a chance in heaven or hell resisting that urge.

Though to be fair the only person who wasn't flushing red by now was Yuzuriha herself who seemed enamored and starry-eyed than anything. She seemed to have a gift for indulging in others' relationships in fiction and around her. She only really flustered when talking about her own love.

When the scene did stop, Kamui's breath hitches. A hand clasps his shoulder and tugs him close. Subaru's smile is so incredibly tender, eyes soften lit up by the TV light. Kamui's violet orbs go incredibly soft, he bites inside his cheek and looks over to his sides. Seeing his friends actually watch the movie, he leans into the warmth with ease.

Occasionally, grasping for several kernels of popcorn, hoping the food keeps his mouth from saying something embarrassing.

Somewhere throughout the movie, Kamui's eyes blink tiredly. Violet-blue orbs glance blearily, into adoring emerald and gold. Long eyelashes flutter, enchanting. Slowly Kamui softly yawns and leans over, resting his head on Subaru's shoulder. He shivers a little There's a comforting arm curling around him protectively. The love-sick man grasps for a blanket and wraps it snugly around the sleepy male. The warmth is entirely too much to resist, Kamui drifts off to sleep.

Subaru rests his head to the side of Kamui's own. An irresistible sleep spell takes over, as it did with an atmosphere this affectionate, warm. When Kamui starts nuzzling his neck, that does it for him. His heart feels wonderfully full.

Absently they fall into slumber together, waking only at the sound of a particularly loud battle scene. The pair sits up abruptly, Kamui nearly bumping his head on the taller male's chin.

Heated cheeks burn painfully. Crimson expressions take over beautiful features. Unintentionally, lip biting and licking, assures Subaru he will need a smoke break very soon. At least if he wants to keep his sanity.

Kamui feels entirely overheated, shrugs the blanket off, though the main source of heat is clouding his senses, judgment. He sees his friend's head whip to the screen.

It becomes a difficult task, looking the other in the eyes. Especially at the knowledge, they'd been caught just now. The younger of the two sinks into the couch, cocooning himself in the previously shrugged blanket. Subaru gently pets Kamui's head and keeps his focus on the seemingly never-ending movie.

Poor Kamui can't manage to look up. Not for more than a few seconds, even after it's time for his friends to go. The credits roll, and a knock is at the door.

"Aw, looks like it's time to get back on campus~," Yuzuriha says looking down at her watch and seeing the estimated time she gave.

"Bye, Kamui. Thank you again for letting us come over," Keiichi speaks the sentiment equally to his classmate and his senior.

"It's not a problem," Kamui answers, awkwardly. He hugs and waves his friends goodbye, watches as they get into their personal driver's car.

"I'll see you Monday! Have a good night you two!~" Yuzuriha chimes out through a rolled-down window. The car takes off. Subaru tugs Kamui back a bit by the hand.

Knees are wobbling. Kamui nearly stumbles back but is caught by the warm body behind him. Familiar arms wrap around his waist from behind, Kamui forces down an embarrassing physical reaction to his already flustered and overly hormonal body. One that had been acting up like crazy as of late.

Thankfully for Kamui's sake and pride, the other doesn't take notice. Somewhere along the way, a door closes behind him and Kamui is pulled into a much tighter embrace than he'd been in all night. Kamui does his best to at least keep his hips back. At least he could keep his hormones in check from embarrassing himself further. Lips flutter all across Kamui'ss forehead. They linger before slowly parting.

"Subaru…" Kamui calls for the other. Wishes, his tone didn't come out so weak, needy.

A yawn escapes his lips before Subaru responds. Softly chuckling, Subaru squeezes Kamui snuggly against him. "We should get to sleep," He advises, attempting to reason that he didn't just feel that reaction from Kamui up against. He bites back a groan.

The reactive male is quick to start parting, hands pressing firmly on the older man's chest. Slowly they part, enough for Kamui to turn around and try, and hurry up the stairs, or maybe better to go to the shower first.

Tonight just couldn't get more embarrassing. This is all without realizing his friend snapped a picture of himself and Subaru sleeping snuggly together on the couch.

Though fate proves him wrong. His knees buckle making him stumble forward a few steps. All too easily, Subaru's arms are under his legs and back, scooping him up bridal style. Kamui practically squeaks out a yelp at the quick movement. His lips form a soft pout, mind dizzying.

"It's alright. I just was a little dizzy I can walk besides I'm sure you have to…"

Subaru doesn't comment but the soft bout of laughter stops Kamui, gives away to his delight and fondness in all of this. Kamui's far too entranced to finish whatever he was going on about. Subaru heads up the stairs, leaving the boy in his arms with an overheated face and hammering chest.

Kamui closes his eyes. The image of a sand-timer pouring out is front and center of his mind, moving faster alongside his fluttering heart. It was only a matter of time...

End

AN: Hope you had fun writing my self-indulgent fluff and angst happy 2021. Things keep bordering on the romantic side for these two. And feelings become quite difficult to brush off. Stay tuned for the next chapter.