Ambrosia

by AyaxRoses

'Love. To truly love, that was one of the only things in this world that would never die. Even if you wished it to. Subaru and Kamui had grown to understand this painfully well.' An alternative ending to the final battle and a future for Subaru and Kamui to be happy together. SubKam SubaruxKamui BL-Yaoi-Shounen-Ai Past Fuuma/Kamui.

27. Mistletoe

Ambrosia 27: Mistletoe

The second part to the holiday/Christmas chapter between them. A lot of cute/fluffy moments as the next chapter may deal with more emotions and self-reflection as it's nearly the end of the 'year' of the universe and a lot has happened.

Mistletoe symbolisms can be for affection, 'give me a kiss, kiss me, looking, love, and to surmount/overcome everything.

---

Painful

The overall aura around this place was mysterious… as much as it was quite painful. The newly restored shrine in front of him was swarming with spiritual energy and regrets…it was draining.

'But I can't imagine how painful this would be for you… '

Subaru reflects over this as he steps near the hill leading to the Togakushi Shrine. The birthplace of the two people Kamui loved most in the world.

'And I couldn't save you from either of those losses…'

Subaru held himself with some blame. Lost in his own pain, not wishing to get involved…he delayed all the seals from getting to Kamui earlier…

But the worst thought...what if he has been there… and still been able to prevent nothing?

'I've been drawn towards protecting you… since that first day.'

Yet, the two Kamui's powers were on a whole other level. His Kamui was then torn between the despair from losing a childhood sweetheart to the hope of saving the best friend and current twin star he found himself falling for. Because of that, inaction became a problem.

Kamui could bear to kill the precious best friend he fell for. As it seemed only a Kamui could be the one to match that level of power.

'Still… if I could have done something…'

Even if only had shielded Kamui's eyes, covered his ears from hearing such a harsh reality, it may have done something. Subaru's memory would always hold hauntingly painful memories. His treasured Kamui holding the severed head of Kotori, crying out for things to stop before going numb, retreating inside himself.

The image of Kamui clutching to the best friend he had fallen so deeply for… in those final moments hurt just as deeply if not more so. Perhaps because Kamui held so tightly to his wish, and hope, it made the aftermath all the more painful.

'I won't let you go through any more losses like that… not ever again…' Because of this internal vow, Subaru had come to realize he was facing something challenging. He truly had to start loving and caring for himself.

'Hurting myself would only hurt Kamui…. I won't let the one I love suffer anymore loneliness…'

The step towards the newly restored shrine was eerie. His psychic senses were going haywire from the spiritual remains and aftermaths taken place here.

Subaru shivered, walking up the steps, to know what seemed like a perfectly cared-for shrine. Any remains of such blood being shed, or the lives being torn apart for the sake of a sword were gone. There wasn't a trace of anything less.

It left the Sumeragi head breathless.

'Your Kekkai is Incredible, my love. Restoring the life here, a place you must have held many precious memories.'

The sight may be too bittersweet. If Kamui ever found himself ready… perhaps in later years… he would be returning to a shrine, as pure and cleansed as the day it was built.

There was a job Subaru was certain he wouldn't let Kamui be involved with. Even if it meant bringing some discourse between them.

'You don't need to protect me from everything!' Kamui shouted lips pursing and forehead scrunching together.

"Kamui… this really… isn't the best-" Subaru had tried before his angered lover jumped in.

"I can handle this! You know that I can! I'm perfectly capable of -"

"It's the Togakushi Shrine," Subaru interrupted, softly and worriedly.

"The-" Kamui stopped in his tracks. His eyes darkened to the point where it was frightening, a black hole swallowing up such beautiful light. He looked down, long bangs shading over the pained expression.

When Subaru reached to grasp his lover's wrist, Kamui pulled it away instantly. His mind is not in a place to realize the hurt, beyond the pained smile.

"Kamui…" Subaru tried again, gently brushing a hand over his lover's arm.

"S-sorry," Kamui voiced, remorseful. He bit his lip, giving his love a final look at a teary-eyed expression. "I… just need some space for a while…"

And with that the pained young man traversed up the stairs, disappearing from sight. Subaru's hand stayed up in place, as though suspended in motion. He clutched that same hand to his chest, aching to know his love was in pain…

With an internal struggle between comforting his boyfriend right away and giving the requested space took place, it didn't last forever. Even if it felt like it…

With a call of his name, Subaru rushed up the staircase to scoop up his lover, letting him cry and feel as much as needed.

Subaru's mind flooded with the pain and empathy pains… his lover's emotions and grief seeping into his heart like no other. His head knelt down, now staring at the ground below.

'It's getting closer to that day…'

That promised day just last year.

As a result, Kamui had struggled opening up. Often retreating for more and more 'alone time' when it came to the Monou family.

'I can't let myself get overwhelmed… Subaru reminds himself, stepping closer towards the well of the shrine.

' I have to be aware. I know I've sensed something lately. '

It wasn't unusual for spirits to be attracted to Kamui's brilliant and angelic aura. But there were worries… some may be more personal. Images remain of blurred yet quite sharp violet orbs- watching them from Clamp schools ghost walk.

'I need to know more… there's no sense in making Kamui worry without knowing the truth.'

Spirits were everywhere, and with the destruction brought on from the last year, there was no shortage of work to set those souls free.

Seldom did a soul truly pass on happily. It often takes weeks, months, years, and decades for a spirit to decide to let go of the living realm.

Subaru walked further ahead, towards the lingering lost souls. Ones that perhaps sought peace and lingered.

The gifted Onmyouji, closed his eyes, controlling his breathing perfectly to ensure he wouldn't miss anything.

As he walked further towards the newly restored, beautiful, and historic-style temple, he saw things clearly. A small group of spirits, even some small children. All of these lives were taken far too soon.

And there were more souls found every day, from other misfortunes outside of that fateful year.

Several voices sounded off at once, all with their own worries. Not just at the shrine but all over Tokyo, voices resounded.

'Why did this happen…?' - One would cry, still paralyzed in whatever occurred before they were swept to exist only in the spiritual realm.

'I'm scared'- Frightened, and numerous voices sounded off.

'Where are my friends?' - Loneliness took over, as the words were called desperately.

But the closest voice… And more noticeably prominent high-pitched was lingering right at the shrine. 'I can't find my mom and dad! "

Subaru promised to help them move on. The first spirit was lingering near the doorway to the shrine.

Subaru moved to the door to see the little spirit. The luminescent glow of ice-blue surrounded the lost souls.

A quivering child spirit loomed around. Her eyes were shaking, as she swiftly moved further back.

"Please, don't be frightened.," Subaru places a warm smile, approaching the young spirit carefully. Every step is soundless and with perfect precision. He held out his hand like an offering.

"Here, my name is Sumeragi Subaru, I'm of the Sumeragi clan of Onmyouji, and I only wish to help you."

Seeing the small ghostly hand reach towards him was a start. "To help me-"

"Yes, that's exactly right," Subaru ensures with a hopeful smile. One that emerged soon after becoming closer with Kamui. r

It was a positive start. From there, Subaru kept working from dawn until dusk, ensuring everyone could move forward, and be at rest.

He was determined to ensure every spirit could pass on. The last thing he wanted was to not leave anything behind, malevolent or not.

It was far too dangerous to let a spirit go, possibly becoming vindictive and harmful over time. This needed to be taken care of. Subaru promised himself to do as much as he could before the holidays approached. He wouldn't let any spirit or job distract him from enjoying that very special holiday.

After all, he had a very special date for Christmas Eve. He planned to do everything to ensure his Kamui would have the best Christmas ever.

'There's still time before the flower shop closes…'

Subaru recalls, feeling warmth at the thought of surprising his boyfriend after a long day apart.

---

Gifts

Shopping malls were surrounded by dazzling Christmas lights. They filled up fast with more and more customers.

There wasn't a shop without some sort of holiday decor. Beautiful hanging snowflake crafts and paper snowmen were pinned up beside the store's front doors.

Long curly strands of gold and silver tinsel were surrounding several doorways. Even the food court had vendors with origami presents, Santa hats, and reindeer crafts.

Much like the outdoor mini-mall nearby, there was a very grand Christmas tree, centered in the middle. The golden star on top brushed barely under the ceiling.

It was a rare day, Subaru had most of the day off, while his lover had school. This was a good opportunity for him to go out and get some surprises for his precious boyfriend.

He grasped for the cell phone in his coat pocket. His fingers nimbly opened and scrolled through the various text messages he exchanged with Kamui's friends.

They all had different ideas of what Kamui wanted.

Yuzuriha and Keiichi were closest in age to Kamui and were well aware of different series his boyfriend would like. Interest in new volumes of manga, anime box sets, and collectibles was monitored by Kamui's friends as they were out shopping.

There were several new volumes of Kamui's favorite Boys Love titles. They consisted of several male leads and couples on the cover. Some characters wore modern-day clothing, with the setting of a library, flower shop, or Cafe.

Scrolling through his phone a few texts noted more suggestions.

"Kamui kept looking over at these"- was sent with the title of a few particular mangas.

School-themed Boys Love stories were amongst them. A mix of covers with couples being students, a student, and teacher… or perhaps a tutor?

'Maybe I should be taking a hint….?' Subaru thinks warmly, his features heating up just a bit. His lover did seem to have a wandering mind during their last few study sessions.

A good amount of recommendations had a medieval theme, knights and their princes, and several variations of medieval/royal pairings.

Though by far the most recommended titles in both manga, light novels, and anime were those with a fantasy theme. Otherworlds, with mystical creatures, mechas, and RPG-like heroes were among them. Many had their share of BL couples as a side theme.

Neither he nor Kamui was aware enough to realize more often than not one of the main male characters resembles Subaru in some way.

It was in contrast to the more… explicit books Kamui has assumed were kept hidden. It didn't seem necessary in the older man's eyes. Kamui exploring his sexuality was perfectly healthy, and honestly to his lover's eyes, insanely sexy!

His lover had more mature interests… and likely fantasies from those novels and manga. That was something he would wait for Kamui to feel comfortable sharing.

Subaru's arms were already piled high with the different series, and he was only at the first shop. It didn't make carrying it easier, as when available Subaru insisted on buying the bulkier special editions.

"Please, let us hold some of those for you at the front desk," A kindly young worker approached him. She held her arms out taking a good portion of the books.

"Thank you," Subaru graciously returned. Though He knew his arms would be full again in no time.

The young woman glanced down at the titles, seeming to recognize some. Her eyes lit up starry-eyed. "Are these perhaps gifts?"

"Ah, yes," Subaru replied, caught off guard by the newfound intensity in the cashier's eyes.

She clasped her hands together, joyous. "Wonderful, when you're ready to check out can you wrap them up for you if you like?" she glanced down starry-eyed at whatever title she looked over.

"That would be… great," Subaru voiced a little awkwardly, taking a small step to the side. The young woman seemed to be analyzing something looking between the books and him.

There was a different look than one of someone's admiration, it seemed as though she were computing something in her head.

"With all of these, they must be for someone special right?" She asks, seeming ready to bounce off the tip of her toes. An image came to mind of an older Yuzuriha.

"Ah… that's right," Subaru returns, as neutrally as possible. But he can't find the lovesick curl on his lips.

The cashier squealed, before quickly bowing her head in apology. She turned quickly on her heels, back to the front counter. An excited little 'I knew it! ' was murmured as though right from the fangirl's heart.

Subaru just shook his head. He should be more surprised? But seeing the legions of fans Kamui had and the attention they got as a couple… it became fairly common.

But it was much preferred over garnering unwanted flirtation towards himself or worst of all his Kamui!

So he continued to pace down the bookshelves, collecting a treasure trove while he was at it.

But there were quite a few different gift suggestions. As he saw through Yuzuriha's texts.

'Kamui really got into baking custom cookies and cakes. I'm sure he would love to have things like fondants, frostings, edible markers, piping bags….'

And the list went on.

Thankfully below the seemingly endless list was a follow-up. There are a few baking essentials kits Kamui was looking at. With provided photos.

Next were the texts from Karen. He braced himself…

'There are many things I'm sure you are thinking of giving to our sweet - once innocent-Kamui. As far as physical gifts these are some highly recommended ones. They're even holiday-themed - it's perfect"

Her first test read odd with images and a link to the web page of a rather adult-themed shop. The flavored 'holiday' lubricants, red, green, and candy cane colored dildos, vibrators, and remote-controlled toys...were more than enough for Subaru to promptly close his phone and avoid any possible eye contact for the next few minutes.

It wasn't so much the items themselves as… how quickly he could imagine them being used with Kamui…. And that was a damaging thought to his often composed mind.

Briiing…. Riiiiing~

His phone sounded off once more. Subaru groaned bracing himself for me.

And on a less mature note, she added on, 'Kamui is sentimental… a gift made for him or custom. Though it's early for it… I won't stop you from buying Kamui a ring. "

Subaru flushed even deeper, for a very different reason at that one. While she was likely teasing due to the common proposals taking place on Christmas Eve, it still affected his heart. His heart sped up, as it did whenever this came up, more specifically with his grandmother.

While she held no judgment towards his lover's gender, she upheld many other traditional views.

Being the leader of the Sumeragi clan, came with expectations. One did not 'casually date' in such a position. A romantic partner should be someone stable who will eventually be brought into the family.

Thankfully he was not under a set time limit. It helped, they still had at least a few years before Kamui was to turn 20…

Though that was as far as paperwork went… a more ceremonial wedding within the Sumeragi estate could be done at any time.

Perhaps, that's what others in his clan assumed would take place sooner rather than later. News of the Sumeragi's beautiful leader being quite taken managed to spread.

But it's not as though he wanted to hide or deny his relationship with Kamui.

Being the 13th head of the Sumeragi clan was far from a position he took lightly. He wouldn't bring anyone home that he wasn't 100% committed to.

However, there was no one and certainly title on this earth or the spirit realm that meant more…than being Kamui's lover.

And perhaps in the next few years, Kamui's husb-

'It's a nice thought for the future…' Subaru shakes his head, clearing his throat and holding a hand over his mouth. The last thing he wanted to do was let any of these thoughts slip.

Now was the time for Kamui and himself. To celebrate a very special occasion together.

Subaru tried not to gush so much over that having just recovered from his mind's earlier wanderings…

And he was failing… His mind conjured up a beautiful image of himself and Kamui holding hands beneath a starry sky and admiring the beautifully lit streets and serene holiday music played. They could return home from there and cuddle up, watching some cliché holiday movie or going outside to check for snowfall.

'We still have a few more of our firsts to experience.'

Their first Christmas together. And the present moment… getting those gifts together.

'For you, I'll do everything I can to make this time perfect.'

---

Searching

Kamui ducked beneath a dangling Christmas wreath at the doorway of the shopping mall. This mall was exclusive for those within Clamp school to visit.

"You're lost in thought again," Keiichi Sawada had patiently walked right beside his shorter classmate. His lips curled with amusement seeing Kamui's eyes gazing off somewhere in the abyss, focusing hard on whatever problem he was facing.

"I just…" Kamui hadn't finished the thought, finding his heart and mind scattered as it was. Instead, he continued to pace forward, anxiously heading forward towards the small shops.

"You're thinking of him again, I can tell," Keiichi perceived, with a genuine display of warmth. There was something bittersweet about the smile he held. "You have the most sincere expressions, whether you're extremely happy or troubled… I just get the feeling it has to do with him."

"It's… not always like that," Kamui weakly defended himself, knowing anything more would make for an obvious lie. With a bit of guilt, he hung his head in an apology. "I…I'm sorry if I do get… lost in thought too much about him…"

"Huh?" The brunette stopped, looking worriedly at his lovesick friend.

"I do appreciate seeing you and having helped me with this," Kamui meekly professed, feeling a pang of reluctance. "I don't mean to only think-"

Keiichi's eyes widened before quickly shaking his head. "Oh, no no no!" He placed a hand over Kamui's shoulder blade, looking at him seriously.

"Not at all. Subaru is the one you love the most. It's only natural he's in your thoughts the most too."

"I…" Kamui immediately flushed at the (accurate) explanation given. He held a finger to his mouth, looking around to avoid any more unneeded attention than usual. He paused with a sense of uncertainty.

'How is my heart still beating this hard… just hearing something like that?' Kamui flushed a deeper red from his thoughts. Hearing how deeply he loved Subaru or vis versa would always have some effect on him.

To distract from the earlier topic. Kamui called out, "I think we should start over there."

His finger pointed in the direction of an oddly mystical-looking shop. The black curtains surround the entryway. Mystical purple lights stood out from the adjacent shops surrounded by the usual red and green.

A series of old-looking spell books, sparkling stones, crystal balls, and prayer beads were displayed upon one side of the shop.

The other side hosted a spread-out deck of beautifully illustrated tarot cards, on top of a small circle table, draped with a silky cloth. Displayed upon a few adjacent stands were incense sticks, and various candles, with astrological signs engraved on the side.

Something told Kamui this wasn't just for show. Several phony magic shops existed… but on clamp school grounds, it wasn't a possibility. Things were all screened through the Imonoyama family, and a fake magic shop seeking to make a quick profit wouldn't align.

The feeling emanating from the shop was strong. The school's director had been acquainted with Tokiko and knew of the Magamis among other gifted spiritualists.

So a legitimate store like this wasn't out of the question. Though there were undoubtedly people going in for the aesthetic appeal of a mystical store.

'At the least, I could probably find more ink or paper strips he's used for casting spells.. . Maybe?'

"There might be something Subaru would like in there," Kamui returns, keeping his gaze ahead.

"I think that's a great idea," Keiichi responded despite not knowing everything about his friend's life outside of school. Clearly, Kamui showed interest in more magical and spiritual subjects (especially in fiction).

"Mhm," Kamui confirmed, walking distractedly into the shop. "I hope so…" He murmured, rather softly. Walking in ahead to see an older woman at the front desk, looking curious, as though to study Kamui.

"Welcome," She greeted with a toothy grin. She seemed to have some spiritual senses, caught off guard by someone as gifted as Kamui walking in.

"Are you looking for anything in particular?" She asked transfixed on the magnificent aura around such a young high-school boy.

Kamui nodded in acknowledgment of a greeting. Thankfully his more boisterous friend responded.

"We're just looking for Christmas gifts now," Keiichi supplied happily, turning to his quieter friend, wandering throughout the store.

"Ah, well let me know if you need anything," The older woman returned with a gracious smile. She disappeared behind the front desk, apparently grabbing more items from the back, by the sound of it.

There was a plethora of various books, cards, beads, and countless items. Many of the paper charms he recognized from the earlier jobs, working with Subaru.

'If they had that then I can probably find something… ' Kamui found himself lost in thought, wandering towards a wall of old books, appearing to be about some spells.

There were a few history books, with images of different exorcists, onmyouji and meditative gurus.

Perhaps, for someone casually dabbling into things like this, it worked fine.

'If he doesn't already have them. He could easily access any of these if he wanted.' The Sumeragi estate and family had their vast share of resources.

There were more colorful and lighter reads the further he went down.

"Oh, you're going to pick something based on his sign?" Keiichi blurted with excitement, having remained quiet before now.

Kamui lightly laughed. He had grown used to his friend's enthusiasm.

"Y-yeah…" Kamui returned, laughing softly to himself. It was inexpensive and certainly something to add along with the Christmas cake.

'Worst case scenario Subaru would find the gift as being… cute or something?' And skimming through it once or twice for the sake of it being a gift.

'Pisces' were words printed boldly on the front of several smaller books and brochures. Some featured subtitles involving 'Love, and career predictions'.

There is a more general book, with the Pisces fish symbol designed nicely for the cover.

"He's a Pisces then," Keiichi commented. Cheerily, he broke out into a smile. He pauses as though to think through some problem before. "That's right. I definitely remember you spending a ton of time in the home ec room last February, I think it did have something to do with his birthday then."

"I… guess I did spend some time learning to cook a few things," Kamui's violet-blue eyes shimmered, as his cheeks lit up a soft cherry-red. He averted his gaze. 'It was beneficial for both of us to learn to cook more…'

Last February, Kamui had yet to feel… or at least not realized how deeply his feelings ran for Subaru.

"Definitely, you've learned to cook so many amazing meals, from CLAMP school, and so quickly! I'm actually pretty jealous," Keiichi praised his friend, looking so bright. He rubbed the back of his neck. "Your boyfriend is very lucky to taste your cooking all the time."

"I don't know about that…" Kamu nervously swallowed the statement. His heart sped up, as he kept walking forward. "It's nothing all that special…" He finished humbly, continuing to move past the bookshelves and towards another section of the shop.

'It was Subaru's birthday… and I'm sure the first time in a long time he wasn't so alone… learning to make a few favorite foods was the least I could do. '

Kamui couldn't hide the dreamy little smile. His (not-yet) boyfriend had been so sweet. Seeming as though the picnic lunch Kamui provided was a gift from the heavens. His feelings were in turmoil, between mourning Fuuma and clutching tightly to the kindness Subaru always offered. His current lover was so patient, understanding, and always there to comfort.

Looking back on it, just made those romantic feelings for his boyfriend even deeper. Their little love story had come quite far til now.

More recently fond memories sprung to the surface. Kamui's eyes fixated on the varying sizes of dark blue star charts, hanging on the walls. Globes lit up with several constellations all over. There was no shortage of reference books.

"Maybe there's… something here he might like," Kamui spoke quietly, under his breath. Unknowing how his friend seemed all too happy and joyful to see Kamui so at ease.

"Your boyfriend is interested in astrology?" Keiichi asked so kindly. The warm-hearted brunette flipped through a few professionally illustrated guidebooks.

"He…" Kamui had to wonder if all his friends were doing this on purpose. Referring to Subaru like that.. . Because it never failed to make him react: namely blushing and stumbling a bit. "He knows a bit about it…" He made the understatement.

'Onmyouji do need to have knowledge of astrology, star readings… so he might find it interesting?.' Kamui was once again reminded. The complexities of his boyfriend… and his future career entailed.

Surely, the Sumeragi library had a plethora of resources on the subject. Books, maps, and guides existed that were likely only privy to those in the Sumeragi clan.

But getting a gift a little more… sentimental… might be nice.

'Our… anniversary was very special… Subaru seemed at ease… talking about the stars…'

It brought out a present memory for both of them. Among other things that happened that night. Kamui shook his head lightly.

He begins kneeling before a unique-looking orb displayed on a small table off to the side. There was a sleek black curtain hanging over what appeared to be a shelf.

"Oh, that's a constellation projector," The shopkeeper spoke up, dragging Kamui from his thoughts. "They've been quite popular lately, you can turn on the blue switch to try it out."

Kamui nodded his head calmly. He felt himself growing warmer as he turned on the light, seeing a small section of the constellations projected upon the dark wall.

The way each constellation and cluster of stars lit up, was nothing short of brilliant. While nothing could compete with the natural beauty of the stars, this was mesmerizing. The design seemed so intricate and hand-crafted.

The globe continued to turn, displaying various stars, so vividly and clearly.

"It's beautiful. "

Kamui heard his friend comment. He hummed in agreement. The brunette just beamed, sensing they had accomplished finding some very good gift options.

"There's a small room in the back if you'd like to see any of the light displays better", the shopkeeper told Kamui, seemingly thrilled the young male with such an incredible aura, finding something he took such interest in.

'If I could find one… That specifically focused on your stars…' Kamui thought to himself, smiling, lifting his entire expression, with hope.

His boyfriend's beautiful cluster of stars was well known and liked by many stargazers and astrologists alike.

So the hopeful boy walked over to peer at the adjacent shelves, with a variety of different shapes and sizes of projectors. Some focused more on specific constellations, such as the astrology signs.

'This might be something he'll like… something we could look at together.'

Kamui's eyes sparkled brilliantly, as his mind played out an endearing scene. Cuddling up with his boyfriend, in their bed, turning off all the lights and gazing up at their personal night sky. Belonging to just the two of them.

'That might… be really nice…' Kamui reflected, a bit dreamily. He found himself eventually pulled over to head into the darker mini-room, seeing even more beauty in star projections than before.

Maybe, he would be able to come up with a few sentimental gifts this year after all. Perhaps, they could create even more memories.

---

Advice

Kamui loved his friends. He reminded himself never to take for granted the people he had in his life. Everyone formerly of the Dragons of Heaven, he ensured to keep in touch with.

But right now… he was having doubts on if he should be seeking advice from everyone on his gifting journey. He couldn't even look his boyfriend in the eyes, making dinner. His mind was stuck on the image of several very mature gift ideas, sent over by Karen.

One of them being an erotic 'costume' if one could qualify it as that. The fabric within was nothing more than a long red ribbon.

A drawing of a male model was displayed on the bag. The model is draped and tied up in long, silky red ribbons displayed in front of the gift bag. The model drawn out appeared to be a sleek young male, with eyes drawn to look seductively forward, with a long ribbon twirled around their bare legs.

'And being bound like that…'

Kamui couldn't imagine anyone else he would even feel comfortable with aside from Subaru. Even then the idea of donning such revealing costumes brought on anxiousness.

A fair amount of the ribbon was looped several times from the waistline up. Those same red ribbons wrapped seductively around the model's bent arms and curled up and around the forearm and wrist. Sleek and exposed arms were snuggly tied to either side of the model's chest. A bright and oversize red bow displayed right in the center of his chest.

'If Subaru really likes that thing… I wouldn't be against it…' But he would have to hear it directly from his love to go into that.

If anything the ribbons themselves didn't seem intimidating. It was much preferred to other methods of tying.

'But only if Subaru tells me himself, he likes this…'

Kamui's heart couldn't handle doing something quite so flustering and erotic unless he knew his boyfriend would absolutely love it.

Truly, Subaru has expressed no specific desires or turn-ons…

At the least, there was none he directly brought up…

Except maybe…

The idea struck Kamui's mind swiftly and made him blush a deep rose-red.

'Subaru does get a bit… more passionate when I'm wearing his clothes.' Kamui blushed at the image, feeling a little fire stir in his stomach. 'He'd never ask directly… but I could feel there was something there.'

Somehow, even his lover's 'turn-ons' feel sweeter than anything, filling him with a sense of belonging.

Kamui took both of his hands up covering his face. He returned back to his home and entered the living room.

He tiredly continued tossing his phone off to the side and diving headfirst into the couch. The love-filled student felt his cheeks melting through the pillow.

'It's not fair for Subaru to be that cute, and cool and attractive and-' Kamui murmured his growing problems into the pillow. His boyfriend was nearly ten years his senior, yet… had moments of being downright adorable, especially to his lover's eyes.

His lips curled down, attempting a sulk which turned into a soft little pout. 'I have it… way too bad…'

Glossy violet eyes peered up and above the soft pillow. His lips curled up, seeing a small black and white bundle of fluff, staring up at him.

The little kitten tilted her head. Her bright eyes looked all too curiously over her owner, studying him.

"Hana, you know what it's like when seeing Subaru," Kamui spoke to the curious creature. "He's so…"

There were somehow too many words and not nearly enough to describe this all at once.

'He made me feel way too many different ways.'

The lovesick teen rolled onto his side, patting a soft cushion. Her ears perked up at the name of her other precious owner.

"Mrow~" She sprung up to rest on the couch. Little Hana shifted closer, brushing up against Kamui's side with affection. The young male reached out to brush the top of the kitten's head.

"I just wish I knew more… of what he would really like as a gift," Kamui voices his concerns, burying his face partly into the pillow again. "I've tried getting more ideas but…"

His friends' ideas and opinions varied, going all over the place. Some gift ideas being much more 'adult' than others.

One thing in common was…

"Perhaps… I could ask them," Kamui phrases his thoughts aloud.

"Meow~" Hana pawed at Kamui's messy raven hair, playing with it. She seemed content to see her owner look up again, and of course, give her more pets and attention.

"It somehow felt comfortable… talking about Subaru there." The young student reflected, leaning up slightly, and grasping for his neglected phone. He dialed a familiar number,

"Hello, this Clamp school administration services, May I ask who's calling?" The familiar voice of a soft-toned receptionist came in.

"This is Shirou Kamui and-"

"Oh!" The woman eagerly broke out. "Director Imonoyama will be thrilled to hear from you. It has been a while hasn't it?"

"It has…" Kamui concluded, with a sense of hope in his chest. It always seemed to help to talk about many things with those in charge of the school. Whether questions about his family or Subaru, he had relied on the input of the former Clamp school detectives to hear him out.

Maybe, it could help clear his head a bit… to gain insight into what to give to someone who had already given him everything he really needed…

---

Something Personal

The next morning, Kamui managed to squeeze in an appointment. The visit with the school's popular director, landed during his lunch break so there was no scheduling conflict.

The young student was immediately greeted with joy and enthusiasm. From the enthusiastic receptionists to the Director himself. He felt welcomed with open arms.

Perhaps it was more due to Nokoru Imonoyama being the only one with connections to his late Aunt. Still, there was a sense of belonging, certainly different than being home with his love but still irreplaceable.

'I'm going to miss this place once I graduate…' Kamui began realizing with a sense of melancholy. The supportive staff, his friends, classes, and all the festivals and events his school came up with. Lingering sadness filled the student.

That emotion was countered by more happiness he had focused on, starting his future and being able to use his powers for something good, for something that was his own choice. The bittersweet feelings swept away, as he found a warm hand brushing down his arm.

"Are you alright? You seemed so sad just now?" The perceptive voice called towards him. Kamui found himself looking past a curly head of deep green and into a pair of shimmering gray-blue eyes.

"Akira?" Kamui replied, finding himself a bit dazed. His future was no easy task, there would be things he'd miss no matter what road he took.

But being at his favorite person's side, and being able to use his gifted powers for good...there was nothing that he wanted more.

"It's been some time, I came down to the lower floor to get a few more things for our director's favorite milk tea." Akira kindly explained, returning to a rolling cart behind him in the hallway.

"You don't have to work at the hospital?" Kamui voiced his thoughts aloud. 'How does he manage to do all this work, around campus?' The soft-spoken male busied himself assisting in teaching cooking lessons, pediatric lectures for the University in addition to his work with children. That and tending to make wonderful desserts and drinks for his friends in charge of the school.

"I'm not scheduled to go in today, so far at least," He answered brightly with a little laugh. Gray-blue eyes sparkled at the admission "Making treats and drinks for my close friends to enjoy is a guilty pleasure of mine I couldn't pass up."

Doing something kind for his close friends… was a 'guilty' pleasure.

'He's far too pure.' Kamui thinks looking over the male who exemplified such a light and wholesome personality.

"You can head up the stairs," Akira told the introspective student. "I know our Kaich-Director is excited to get to talk with you again."

"Alright," Kamui bowed his head for a bit before heading towards the elevator and up to the top floor of the director's office.

"I'll be right there in a few moments," Akira promised with a pure and bright sheen to his smile.

Nokoru was just as Kamui clearly remembered. He held a white fan over the lower half of his face. His sky-blue eyes spoke of pure mischief.

Suoh had his hands full, sorting the endless files and paperwork, Nokoru carelessly brushed to the side. The overworked assistant held a hand to his forehead, seeming far used to this routine. He ran his fingers through his oceanic-blue hair and sighed.

"Kaichou," He addressed the highly esteemed director by the familiar title. In many ways, he hadn't changed since those days.

'But even at his most… irresponsible. It's far better than seeing him last year.'

Nokoru had his own role to play in that promised year. Assuring the Dragon's of Heaven and the Holy Sword would have a safe haven if only for a little while.

The blonde prodigy wore his sunshine bright smile during the day, for all his precious students. While at night it faltered, tears rushed down his cheeks, at the news of another of his precious students losing a loved one.

Truly, there wasn't a single student he hadn't cared for… nor been affected by the losses so many of them faced.

'Kamui being back… is proof the days of near-constant losses are behind us. You become brighter just by seeing him…' Suoh reflected, with a fondness for his closest friend. He couldn't blame Nokoru, simply talking with Kamui could make you feel lighter.

The blonde director cheekily grinned at the first sounds of knocking.

"Come in, come in!" Nokoru welcomed, voice as charismatic and bright as his natural persona. Sky-blue eyes sparkled at the sight of the flushed student, ducking his head in.

"I think we already know who you're here to talk about," Nokoru grinned quite cheekily. His gaze focused on and significantly brightened at the sight of Kamui walking into the room. The poor student flushed red, keeping his eyes on the floor. "Am I right?"

Kamui blushed a deeper red, still so young and affected by the mention of his romantic world. He hummed a sound of some kind of acknowledgment before taking a seat the director waved towards.

"I saw Akira down the hallway," Kamui moves towards changing the subject. He glances over towards the door, half expecting a knock to follow at the mention. His

"Yes! He was excited to know you'd come visiting during your lunch break today," Nokoru chirped, lacing his hands together and resting them on the front of his desk. "You're really in luck today!"

"Why is that?" Kamui asks, curiously. Certainly, being able to see three of the most influential figures of CLAMP school was lucky enough. But the director wasn't one to refer to himself in such a way.

"Today's the day, Akira's been perfecting a new dessert!" Nokoru glowed with pride at his younger friend's talents. He went starry-eyed at the mention of whatever this new dessert might be. "Even with his work in the pediatric department. He manages to make the most amazing sweets!"

"We already know, Akira works very hard. You, on the other hand, Kaichou…" Suoh sighed a bit more dramatically than needed. The exasperated assistant folded his arms under his chest.

His amber eyes became transfixed, turning to an icy gaze the Nakamura clan has become known for… though that was usually towards those who dared to harm the person they swore to protect. But there was no real malice... Just exasperation.

"If only some of that diligence would rub off on you, then we wouldn't be behind with work for our new transfers." A hand came up to rest by his temples. He combed his fingers through the long ocean-blue strands framing his facial features.

"Eheheh," Nokoru playfully rubbed at the back of his head. He attempted to brush off The lecturing gaze pointed the blonde's way and refused to falter. He waved his hand down. "There's still time for all that later Suoh~ And besides-"

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Oh, perfect timing!" Nokoru chirps, eager for the distraction. "Come on in, Akira~"

The culinary prodigy opened the door, wheeling in a nostalgic metal cart to the office.

"I hope I didn't keep you waiting long," Akira enters the room, his voice so caring and humble. He proceeded to take a few teacups upon the top layer of the cart. Graciously, he poured the cups of warm milky tea, as he had for many years. Though this time having an added guest to the mix.

Happily, Akira handed the first cup of tea to Kamui. Their guest deserved the best after all! Nokoru made a face, his mouth pouting and slightly opening to protest something.

Akira simply laughed, seeming used to the response. "I'm serving Kamui first, he's a guest and we haven't seen him in so long."

Nokoru couldn't object to any of this. This went especially as a steaming and fragrant cup of tea was placed on the desk in front of him.

"This smells delicious," Nokoru praised, taking a dip of the warm beverage and returning to his usual chipper self.

"I've also tried out a new recipe for a lemon blueberry cake one of my patients bragged about," Akira explained, already reaching for the slices of the yellow, sugary dessert.

"You still spoil him Akira," Suoh voiced onto the second youngest in the room. He shook his head, seeing the way the blond practically sparkled taking a first bite of the cake.

"It's really has been too long since I've got to bring in anything for you all, so I think doing this much is fine," The gifted young baker responded. There really wasn't any complaining when several pieces of the fruity dessert were placed out.

"Thank you," Kamui added a bit meekly. 'I may need to ask him for some advice… for making the Christmas cake.' He made a mental note. 'But not right here…'

The director would be all too amused and happy to tease the love-sick student. There was a nice moment of serenity, before the matter Kamui meant to discuss came up again.

"Kamui, you have something on your mind, you wanted to talk about right?" Nokoru inquired, knowingly, and with more than a hint of intrigue. His sky blue eyes twinkled at the prospect.

"Yes… it's not a serious problem, but-" Kamui bit down on his lip, gaze fixed on his lap. His hands circled around the teacup, clutching it a bit anxiously. "It may sound…silly…" Compared to all the problems faced in life, 'I don't know what else to give my boyfriend for Christmas?' was not exactly in the top tier.

"I'm sure it's nothing like that," Nokoru returned, reaching a hand out to brush over Kamui's shaky ones. With a comforting tone, he followed up, "Not if it's something that's been bothering you."

"Thank you… for saying that." Kamui expresses, refraining from biting his lips further. His lips curve slightly giving the director a polite smile. "I just… have been thinking about the holidays coming up."

"Ah, you're first Christmas Eve as lovers~" Nokoru couldn't help but tease in a light sing-song voice.

"Kaichou," Suoh warned, stopping the director from embarrassing the poor student any further.

Though after a comment like that, and his stomach doing somersaults, Kamui couldn't manage to look anyone in the eyes just yet.

Very quietly, Kamui finally opens up about his worries.

"I've thought so much about it but I don't know…." Kamui voiced, feeling a pang to his chest. Subaru's given me so much… and because of that- "I want to give Subaru something he'd really like… that would make him happy."

"Kamui…" Nokoru's eyes lower, calling softly. He hadn't planned on this worry to bring up such deep emotions for the younger man. Kamui bites his lop, not quite ready to look back up.

"He's given me so much already… I just want to do the same," Kamui admits, hands grasping the cup of tea tightly. As he looks down he can see his reflection.

There's a soft bit of silence. The former members of the Clamp school detectives look between themselves. There is a wordless conversation, looking into the other's eyes and nodding over who would respond first.

"Kamui," Nokoru Imonoyama was never one to shy from speaking on matters of the heart. With a dramatic display of emotions, the blonde bolts up from his seat, hands lying flat upon the desk. He looks into the younger man's eyes. "I think you're already doing quite a lot now." The usual mischievous sky-blue turns a bit darker, more steady, and serious.

"The fact you're putting this much thought into a gift, I'm positive is more than enough to make your lover immensely happy as it is," Nokoru pauses, taking a breath, and finding himself relaxing as Kamui looks him in the eyes again.

"There are tons of gifts you could go out and buy… I'm happy to help out if you have anything in mind like that. But I feel your boyfriend is sentimental… and something personalized… maybe a gift you make for him, I'm sure will make him thrilled, euphoric even."

"Well, Subaru has seemed happy… with the different meals and desserts I've made for him," Requesting just a homemade Christmas cake. But the sentiment went far beyond the material value.

"See, I think that's something you should put your energy into," Nokoru expresses starry-eyed. "Creating a gift sounds like a great place to start."

"Yeah…" Kamui reluctantly agrees. 'A place to start but I only have so much time…' It would help if he could make a kind of gift that would last a bit longer than the food he made.

"Kaichou does have a point," Suoh was one to voice his thoughts soundly. He looks up at the kind blond director. He nods his head in agreement. "Honestly, Kamui this isn't a forte of mine. But from what I've seen with you two together…I don't think you could go wrong. So long as it's from you and all..."

"We do have several art rooms and kitchens open on campus if you'd like to work on something here," Nokoru graciously offered, kindness radiating from two dazzling blue orbs.

"T-Thank you," Kamui responded, a bit uncertain how to accept so much being offered to him, like he had given so much himself, literally saving their earth

"You two are living together, perhaps something for the home? Maybe a picture to put up... " Nokoru suggests, eyes full of sincerity.

"That…might be something he would like," Kamui realizes, imagining his lover holding onto something personal. They had a few pictures taken together. Many come from attending school festivals together. Still, nothing for the holidays and not specially framed.

'Subaru treasured that one photo…. For so so long…' Kamui caught a quick glimpse of it while unpacking a few things to their new home together.

The image showed his boyfriend being sixteen years old, alongside his twin sister and the former Sakurazukamori… fronting such a bright and kindly smile.

It was quickly put away… but still to be held close for this long. Even if it caused pain, it clearly held importance and memories of happier times.

They didn't have a chance to make pleasant memories last year. A personal photo together, maybe even themed for their first Christmas together, might work just right. Perhaps, his lover would cherish and look at the picture with joy as he looked into it.

"Maybe I'll look at some of the smaller frames in the photography rooms," Kamui voices again, a little fond smile curling over his lips. Much like the cake, it was relatively simple, yet held such value. The time and thought put into putting this together would more than makeup for it.

"And if there's anything I can help with I'd be glad to. I've made my share of desserts and dishes for the holidays," Akira steps in with such a positive and innocent smile. Despite his talents, he speaks so humbly. "I can say I'm talking from experience… and some trial of error."

"I would appreciate that…" Kamui meekly responded, looking towards the cooking prodigy with sparkling eyes. "I mean… there might be some dessert Subaru would like." He responded like his heart wasn't fluttering, at the thought of such a sweet, personal gift request.

"That should be no problem," Akira beamed with that same light of innocence.

Kamui felt a little bit of relief at the assurance and the help. 'I will think up more ideas about this… but making more gifts for Subaru… sounds very nice. '

---

Decorating…

Kamui had long since given up on telling himself he shouldn't be melting at every single first they shared.

Still, the sight of his boyfriend knelt down, opening up a box filled with artificial branches, and stems have his brain turn to mush.

Soft white icicle lights were draped around their tree. Gentle Christmas songs were playing quietly in the background. Beautiful shimmering green strands of garland were draped around the home. Within the center of the doorways were small golden bells, surrounded by deep green Holly leaves and bright red berries.

A beautiful green wreath, with a perfectly tied shoe in the center, hung on either side of their door.

Even the cartoony snowman and present decals on the window held their charm. Gifts from his well-meaning friends. Things felt so light now.

Kamui adored the sight of his boyfriend, fiddling with some of the branches of the tree, trying to keep them separate. A soft melodic hum escaped the older man's lips. He melted in place.

Subaru must know it… as he glances back, with an almost victorious gleam within his eyes, catching Kamui staring.

After a brief moment of detangling with a few strings of garland, he turned back fully. His gold and emerald eyes fixated just above Kamui, seeing an interesting decoration. Those same eyes fall back down to their weakness of watery violet-blue.

Subaru had a gushing curl to his lips. He walked closer, closing the distance between them. A tender hand under Kamui's lips was the only warning before his lips were stolen. A sweet, and a far too brief kiss.

Kamui's eyelids flutter. He looks towards his lover expectantly, lips parting, lingering. Even tired goodnight and quick goodbye kisses lasted a little longer than that.

"Mistletoe," Subaru explained, pointing up at the decoration. His lips brushed Kamui's forehead for a moment before he returned to his task. All of this as though nothing happened here like he didn't stir his boyfriend's heart with the little gesture.

"Oh," Kamui returns, closing his eyes at the feeling of familiar lips on his skin. He glances up to see the long green plant wrapped up in a classic red ribbon. Violet-blue eyes turn their gaze to where Subaru had retreated, busying himself with their tree. "I forget we put that up earlier…"

"And above the bedroom, office, kitchen, and front doorway," Subaru supplied all too happily. He knelt grasping at the folded-up tree skirt. One which their cat had claimed happily as a bed and was not too happy to move from.

"I know we put up a lot," Kamui noted, with a little amused smile. "I guess our friends found this gift would go to good use." He moved over to help his lover with their decorating problem. He gently grasped and awoke their spoiled feline. The almost scowling kitten looked up at her owner with a hint of betrayal.

"It looks nice up there," Subaru turned back to look at the festive and colorful hanging decor. All of the tinsel and garland brought out a sparkling pop of color. "And it's nice to have an excuse to kiss."

"I like it too but…" Kamui shook his head, eyes shimmering with fondness. "You don't need an excuse to kiss me." His nimble fingers gently walked over to feel Subaru's hand, which then ran up his arm. The smaller male, shifted his hips, turning his knees until they brushed against his lover's side.

"Kamui…" Subaru breathed feeling a hand caressing all across his shoulders and chest. Finally, that gentle touch settled, fingers curled around a defined jawline. Kamui's face leaned in closer, leading fully enamored eyes to come to a close.

Their noses brushed, and Kamui paused, peeking out at his lover's expression through half-lidded eyes. 'You don't need any excuses...whatever you need….I want to be that for you.' The younger male reflects before finally closing his eyes. Soft plush lips barely brush over a soft welcoming mouth.

Whatever little decoration Subaru had been fiddling with fell to the floor at the first point of contact. Kamui's unoccupied hand traveled in a similar, slow motion. Playful fingers danced their way up a lean-muscled arm, while longing lips part.

'No matter how many times…' Sparks fly, penetrating the heart of both lovers.

Kamui's hands begin to move more insistently. The hand casually on his lover's jaw glides up to cup a heated cheek. Fingers dance lightly over the warm cheekbones before caressing them. While the traveling hand finally stops grasping at the back of the older male's neck. His grip tightens at the feeling of his mouth becoming plundered by a needy tongue, meeting his own. As attention is lavished deeper into his mouth, Kamui mewls into waiting lips.

Subaru leans towards the side, and into a deeper angle to connect. Their lips slot as naturally together as always. He lets his right hand caress all over Kamui's sides and to his back. One hand rests protectively upon Kamui's lap. Those caresses upon the younger man's back move downward and gradually slip just under the hem of a shirt.

"Mnn…" Kamui shivers, at the introduction of more skinship. His face continues to burn like fire, as that handle travels and caresses countless shapes and patterns up and down his back.

Kamui gasps, hips shifting and rocking with every single touch. Earnestly, he follows the patterns his lover traces inside of his mouth. He leans his head slightly to the right, brushing up and connecting their lips over and over again. They meld all too perfectly.

'I probably shouldn't get too carried away…' Kamui reasons, feeling the hand on his lap begin to squeeze him a little harder. 'For a little longer though….'

Their kisses gradually slow from the passionate pace come to a more innocent connection.

It probably wasn't the best place to go further. Leaving their living room full of unhung ornaments and trinkets wasn't the best idea. It's further affirmed, with a high-pitched meow, and the sound of branches crunching beneath tiny paws. That and the sound of something plastic falling over.

Several strands of tinsel have fallen and become wrapped around the feline's legs. By the time the lovers opened their eyes, they witnessed the scene of nearly all the gold tinsel tangled up around the kitten's legs. The tree skirt, just put on moments ago, is all crumbled up. Her paws were caught up in all the

"Hana," Subaru returned with a long sigh and a bit of a warning tone. Though Kamui can't help but laugh, at the sight and how gentle his boyfriend's voice came out. "You know you weren't supposed to climb up there." Kamui rocks to his side, letting his head fall to his boyfriend's shoulder. Violet-blue eyes shimmer with fondness. 'I'm very lucky.'

Even while in 'lecturing mode', Subaru has busied himself with sweetly detangling their kitten's paws. "What if you had gotten hurt from that? You know it's not good…"

A fond, angelic laugh escapes from Kamui's. This earns him very amorous gold and emerald orbs taking him in.

His boyfriend frees the curious kitten and turns to the source of the soft. Soft lips curl up, while his fingers favor tangling into the raven-black head upon his shoulder.

"I guess we should clean this up before starting on anything more…"

Kamui fondly says… "I guess so." A warm bout of laughter spreads between them. Their peaceful and pleasant time flies by, with every colorful ornament being hung on the branches. There was one piece remaining.

The very star on top. Kamui is holding the gold and white star, whilst leaning up on his tiptoes. It's just barely out of reach, but neither seems to mind.

If he were with anyone else, there's no way Kamui would quit here. He'd find some way to place the star topper on the way too high tree. The thought of asking for help, and because...admittedly he was too short would be out of the question.

But he was here with Subaru. And no one else.

Maybe, Kamui found himself curious as to his lover's reaction. "Will you help me?" Violet-blue eyes sparkle as they zero in on their favorite sight.

"Of course," Subaru all too happily comes over. He walks directly behind his lover, wrapping his arms securely around a slender waist. Slow and steady, Kamui becomes lifted off of his feet, finally placing on the finishing touch.

Now, they can take a rest, admiring their tree from a few feet away. Snuggled up on their couch, and drinking cocoa. This was the perfect moment of bliss.

And at this moment something strikes Kamui, to ask.

"Subaru?" Kamui calls gently, trying not to get his words lost under the barrage of affection, lips all across his face and neck.

"Mhm," Subaru hums to acknowledge, despite not stopping. Active lips continue placing sweet butterfly soft kisses down his lover's cheeks.

"I just… is there really nothing else you want?" Kamui asks, lips pursing. And Oh… there's a shivering reaction, at the feeling of his lover's chuckle brushing against his neck.

He stares directly into his lover's gold and emerald.

"You're still thinking of that?" Subaru returns with amorous intentions. 'You're always thinking of me.' The soft curl of his lips met perfectly with a love-filled shimmer in his eyes.

"Well yeah… you always find ways to spoil me," Kamui elaborates with a soft purr. His fingers brush across his lover's cheeks. "I want to do the same for you."

"Kamui," Subaru coos, and places his hand over the one on his cheek. With another fond little coo of, "My Kamui," he locks their lips together for a sweet, lingering kiss.

"Kamui," he calls in the velvety smooth tone that makes his lover's toes curl. "You've given me everything I need." Only to further prove dedication, he continues to hold Kamui's loving hand, bringing it to his lips to linger more.

"I…" Kamui begins, dark lashes batting his lover's way. "I feel the same as you… I just would like to give you a gift… something you may not need but...at least want."

"I tried to give you the best idea I can think of," Subaru banters, so open and comfortable. Maybe, those smiles which follow up, lead Kamui to snuggle extra close.

The younger lover snorts, shaking his head. "And I'll make you the best Christmas Cake possible," His head of raven black snuggles under his love's neck. "But I still want to be able to give more than that."

"I love the way you think of me like this but, there isn't anything else I can think of-all I want to spend all Christmas Eve with you and…" Subaru licks at his lips subconsciously. "Continue well into the next day."

Kamui blinks, trying to process that his lover was expressing his desires for intimacy. Long love-making sessions from the sound of it. That made Kamui's mouth part, wordless, as his facial expression changed. His lover could see the brush of red running higher and grow further along his cheeks.

"That…" Kamui buries his heated face into his lover's chest. The welcoming arms, always ready to surround him, make him feel at home. "Can definitely be arranged…"

It seemed time for Subaru to fluster. Albeit not as badly at his poor lover, still he could feel the burn in his expression.

"I haven't celebrated anything well for so long," Kamui admits in a meek tone. His lips fall a bit at the bittersweet memory.

"Not since I was a child… spending the holiday with Kotori and Fuuma," He continues to profess vulnerability. Subaru feels a tug at his chest and acts accordingly. His arms wrap around him and easily scoop Kamui up and over to rest in his lap.

Said male, falls into the gentle hold, lying forward, his head further buried between his lover's chest and shoulder area. "But...I am happy this year I can celebrate again, with you." He gazes up, violet-blue orbs glossing over with affection.

"I am too," Subaru returns, holding his lover closer. There was still a lingering pain he could sense from his beloved.

'It's close to that time again…' The end of what was a devastating year. He doesn't push it out of Kamui, nor cater to his insecurities telling him he didn't matter as much as those childhood friends. Instead, he cradles the back of Kamui's head with his hand.

Right now, Kamui becomes swept up in the feeling, lying back on the floor. His lover reconnected their lips returning to the warm and loving energy from before. Subaru makes a silent vow.

'I promise this year, I won't let you become unhappy… I want your memories of these events to only be happy ones...'

---

Seeking perfection

'I have to get this right. Subaru never asks for things like this.' Kamui's mind races with worries, arms absolutely full of groceries

Even with the various valentine's treats, and picnics planned out-it was more of something Kamui had already offered.

But this time, as small as it may seem, Subaru asked him. Because of that Kamui had gone around to seven different stores and baking shops.

It was more tiring than expected. Granted, It was over the past two days, all near or on campus.

But spending hours going to and fro, down countless aisles of different shops was tiring.

"But I have to get this down," Kamui voices his thoughts, with a confident stride into their living room.

"Mroow!~" Their kitten greets him at the door, eyes widening at the pleasant smelling bags her owner carried into the kitchen.

"I'm back, Hana," Kamui addresses the tiny animal warmly. The adorable feline follows to the kitchen.

It wasn't long before sounds of 'purrrr purrr' and "nyaow" emitted.

"I just gave you new food before I left for school," Kamui shook his head pausing his sorting for a moment. He held his hands to his hips, looking down at their kitten with a sense of disbelief. "You want a treat, don't you?"

Kamui was answered by the feeling of a warm ball of fluff all brushing all around his legs. Her purring intensified, she looked up with adoring eyes.

The final 'nail' in the coffin had to be her big kitten eyes glimmering as she put her front paws up on her owner's leg. She attempted to climb up Kamui's leg, but slide down shortly after.

"Mrow?" She voiced, seeming to ask sadly, "No Treats today?"

She really wouldn't budge, attempting to dig her claws into the uniform's pants, moving again to climb up to Kamui, using her charms until she finally got the treats she adored.

Kamui shook his head, bringing out a long-drawn-out sigh. He knelt down, scooping up the curious cat with one hand, stopping her voyage.

"Fine, I'll get your treat," He answered with mock exasperation, he couldn't hide the smile on his face, as she followed him step by step, purring all the way.

'Subaru and I are going to have to get used to always having a spoiled cat at this rate.' Kamui finds himself thinking, as he reaches up to a cabinet door and opens it. 'Neither of us can really say no to her.'

To be fair her requests were of no harm to themselves or the furniture, so it didn't hurt. They did set boundaries when it came to scratching and solely using one of her many scratching post houses. Everything else though… they were a bit too weak to the adorable kitten's charms.

There was an entire section of their kitchen dedicated to little Hana, with special cat milk, canned treats, dry treats, and the one brand of cat food she was insistent on eating.

Kamui knew his boyfriend held affection for animals of all kinds. And that Subaru would be a great pet owner again...but he hadn't expected his lover to be this doting and give in to such a tiny creature's demands so easily.

Though he was no better.

Finally, Kamui opened the lid of a can with a chicken and Persian cat printed on the label. He took out a small disposable bowl, breaking up the mound of food, into smaller pieces.

"Here you are," Kamui knelt, placing the bowl in a corner of the kitchen, which Hana took instantly to. She licked her lips and began gobbling up the canned food.

"Now I have to work on Subaru's cake, alright?" Kamui tells the cat, who looks at him for a solid three seconds, processing before returning to her food.

Talking so casually to their cat about things. His boyfriend's habit stuck with him. But animals were known to have spirits, so even if she didn't quite understand, it didn't mean she disliked being talked to.

The only 'problem' here was Kamui would have to be extra vigilant to read between the lines of Subaru being kind and polite or actually impressed with his gift.

This time, and after practicing baking with his friend Yuzuriha and the baking prodigy that was Akira Ijyuin.

Now, he had the cake reading and one other personal gift. The suggestion of gifting a framed photo turned out nice.

There was a fair share of craft stores on and off-campus. Picking out one that felt very Subaru was a must. While not made from scratch, Kamui was in luck to find a painting room on campus. He was able to at least choose the color of the frame this way.

They didn't really have many photos up in the home or decorations at all.

Photos treasured in the past were better left off display. The photo Subaru kept for so long had been one with his late sister and ex-boyfriend...

Kamui's prized photos were mainly from childhood and the framed photo with him and Fuuma… well it was best kept away from now. Wounds could reopen with those reminders.

But this was their life together. They could have a fresh start, new photos, and memories that didn't remain in the past.

'I hope he likes this. ' He reflected while tucking the photo into the deep emerald frame.

While these gift ideas came about, they didn't demand as much attention as the one currently in progress. But this one a direct request from his beloved would have to be amazing!

Kamui spared no expense on getting everything needed to make this gift complete. It helped having earned plenty from the jobs he worked with his boyfriend. Only the best ingredients would do for his Subaru.

Heading out to a popular grocery store he picked out the freshest strawberries he could find.

A small baking shop, adjacent to the bakery was the next place to go. Many ingredients there were even imported from all over.

Everything from the cream, honey eggs, flour, and sugar was top-of-the-line familiar and fancy-looking name brands, he recognized from the one and only Clamp school.

Kamui kept himself busy for the next few hours. Tomorrow, while it may have been even better to have the cake even more freshly baked, it took away the surprise aspect.

Plus, his lover had the next two days, completely reserved for them. So he didn't want to take up any more of their precious holiday time, scrambling to mix bowls and ingredients.

'I know I can make this perfect… for Christmas Eve.' Kamui internally encourages. 'Just remember what you learned at Clamp school.'

He had a top-of-the-line teacher to help him make this wonderful. There were no excuses in Kamui's book.

'Subaru always smiles and thanks me no matter how my cooking turns out.' Kamui senses more in the eyes that tell him whether his food was okay or fantastic.

Kamui looks over to the countertop. Trial and error cakes, cooked too long or too little… decorated too soon…

'I think I can salvage some of it…' At least he could use it for a less festive occasion.

'I almost want to see what Subaru would look like if I gave him these…' Kamui thinks with a little hint of mischief.

His sensible side reminds him this was Subaru. He wasn't just some friend, he wasn't just some boyfriend or lover.

He was his Subaru. Jokes like that likely wouldn't phase his lover. While friends may voice their complaints or at least not eat the less than savory dessert. It wasn't the case with his ever sweetheart of a boyfriend.

He really didn't want his boyfriend to eat something subpar… even if it would mean seeing new and sweet expressions.

'Subaru would eat every last bite…' Kamui's mind supplied.

There were dishes loved more than others by Subaru. But… even at his worst, Kamui couldn't sense in his lover's words, smiles, or eyes that he felt discontent.

He recalls a few words with Akira during their baking session.

'When Utako and I first got to know each other… she would always bake things for me… even using salt in place of sugar.' Akira recalls, laughing blissfully.

Kamui, wide-eyed, couldn't quite understand. He waited for a response.

'My friends couldn't eat a bite of it… but whenever I ate something made by her I found myself eating every last bite… I heard things always taste much better made by someone you love.'

And Subaru has always accepted his cooking with that same interest. Well since the first time…

Then… the entire time we've lived together, he's loved me like that…

An overwhelming amount of love washed over him. He blushes a deep cherry red. He holds a hand to his burning cheek. He berates himself aloud, 'I already knew that…calm down… '

A hand placed over his chest, hugging it tightly. Thinking back brought on such strong feelings.

To keep his mind away, Kamui began his next attempt at the perfect cake. He looks into the empty, metal mixing bowl, seeing his pensive expression.

'No, no, no. I know I can get it this time! '

Kamui begins preparing. the first ingredients into the bowl.

He continues in another bowl cracking and whisking the eggs until they are of a light fluffy texture. Then add in the measured out sugar to lighten the color of the mixture.

All the while he feels their kitten, brushing up against his legs. Maybe even encouraging.

"Thank you, Hana," Kamui chooses to take it as that. He walks around the kitchen to get to their mixer until the mix turns into a nice creamy batter.

This time around things goes by rather quickly. Kamui takes out the layers of shortcake and closes his eyes to ensure the texture is perfect.

The younger baker turns around going to the opposite end of their kitchen. He leans upon his tiptoes to take a container of toothpicks from the cabinet. And the moment of truth comes, testing to see if it had the fluffy texture he yearned to get.

Kamui pressed in and removed the toothpick. He couldn't contain the beaming smile.

"Finally," Kamui voices with relief. All that was left was the decorating, waiting for it to cool, he cleaned up the mess made by the daily baking spree.

Really he must have been baking far more than he realized. Just a moment after frosting and placing the strawberries on top, he hears the sound of the door unlocking.

Kamui felt confident as he looked into the beautifully crafted Christmas cake.

'Perhaps, writing 'I love you' alongside 'Merry Christmas'... Was sappy but… '

Subaru certainly would adore it that way. But he wanted to touch Subaru's heart.

Kamii wanted his love to melt, the way he did. 'It is your fault I'm like this, to begin with.' In the presence of his lover, his heart went completely soft… falling for any romantic trope of gesture purely because his Subaru was the one doing this.

The door opened with a click of the lock. "I'm back, Kamui," Subaru all too tenderly announced his arrival.

"Welcome home," Kamui couldn't help but return with the same softness. His smile was melting now.

Kamui simply thought he had the upper hand in being the best boyfriend, of the day at least. But leave it to his Subaru to rival him for that.

"How was your-" Before he could turn back around, he felt arms around his stomach and a warm chest pressing into his back. "-day."

"It was long, tiring" Subaru answers with some honesty. His lover turned around in the hold, embracing him tightly. "But that doesn't matter now."

Kamui leans up on his tiptoes, they close their eyes, knowing where this leads. They held each other in a gentle gaze. Falling helplessly.

"Oh," Subaru quickly scampers to the entryway. He returns very soon, with an ethereal glow and beaming smile on his face.

`"I guess I couldn't wait to give you some kind of gift," He laughs so helplessly at this emotion between them. "These are for you."

His lover has his arms full of Christmas flowers. The bright red petals of the poinsettia and the lively green of their leaves fit perfectly into their little atmosphere.

"Thank you," Kamui gushes, hugging the bouquet tight to his chest. "I finished your gift if you'd like to try it."

"I can wait. I know you made it special for Christmas eve," Subaru affectionately ruffles the top of Kamui's head, before playing with the silky hair. "And right now… the only thing I want is…"

Subaru didn't finish. He didn't need to. The perfect blend of absolute love, devotion, and desire shimmered in both their eyes. In no time, Kamui found the flowers off to the side as he was scooped up and placed to sit on top of their counter.

Kamui's heart raced at the spontaneity of this all. His rather careful boyfriend seemed very passionate from the start, already claiming and deepening a kiss with his lover.

He didn't know what had gotten into him. But right now, Kamui indulged in this Pre Christmas gift.

---

-Christmas Eve-

Finally, tonight would be their date night. More specifically this was their first Christmas together as a couple.

Last year's holiday season was the furthest back on everyone's mind, everything happening so quickly.

But this year will be different.

Bright golden stars were sparkling above a dazzling tree display in the center of the Tokyo shopping district.

Countless strings of light twinkled highlighting, white, green, and red colors. A beautiful light display was set up just near the central shopping district. Walking through archway after archway was magical, seeing everything from snowflakes and presents to full-on art compositions. All of this was made purely with lights.

'Somehow it's… even more, beautiful than I thought… almost magical…' Kamui reflects, pressing his lips together, over and over. Even amongst the cold outside they still felt very warm and… taken care of.

Things of romance were never in the plans for Kamui to fall hard for. Yet, adding his boyfriend into the equation, arm around his waist, angelic smiles looking down at him, things changed. It was like looking at the world in full color for the very first time.

"... I haven't celebrated Christmas in…" Kamui speaks out, almost shivering at the sight of how quickly his lover's eyes came to captivate him. The shiver only makes his lover worry, wrapping him up even more snuggly to his side. The younger male is scratching his cheek a little sheepishly. "I don't know how long…"

"I can understand the feeling…" Subaru returns with a soft gentleness. There are bittersweet emotions, as his mind rambles on with his prior memories of Christmas...and…

'Hokuto…' Subaru walks a little more slowly, tightening the arm around Kamui for comfort. 'Are you able to be happy now? I truly hope you no longer are blaming yourself for what happened in the past…'

For the final spell of hers, to create a most painful scene, instead of keeping them alive. If he'd only known… if only he could have 'woken' up earlier but…

"Subaru," Kamui calls out in concern, his arm brushes comforting circles upon Subarus lower back. "Are you alright?

Subaru returned to their present moments. The absolute devotion and concern shivering in beautiful doe eyes went right to his heart.

"Yes, my love," He affectionately calls, feeling the broken pieces picking up. "Just lost in thought…" He discreetly kisses the crown of Kamui's head, enjoying how hot the pale lips warmed his cheeks.

"You've gotta stop doing that," Kamui gently teased. His actions were far more honest. Kamui cuddled up to his lover's side, resting that beautiful raven head on his shoulder…

One thought, one if possible brought on so much beauty came to mind…

'If ever possible, I'd like you to meet Hokuto… '

Whether that be many decades from now or through some other spiritual connection… that very thought brought him peace.

'But now… I truly want to live here in the present…' Subaru's reflections come through with a beaming smile. He returns his attention to his personal source of happiness at his side.

They remained huddled up walking through a seemingly endless array of lights.

"I've never seen something like this before," Kamui admits, a little meekly. Not in Okinawa nor in his childhood in Tokyo. Somehow, that made this all the more priceless.

"Nor have I," Subaru returns with empathy. He shakes his head. They turn past an array of lit-up presents and colorful trees on either side. "But I'm glad I have this with you."

"Subaru…" Kamui tucks his head in further. He enjoys the contrast from the brief bout of wind and warm body beside him.

They enter through the main part of the light display. The archways become more prevalent, with an endless amount of lights and arcs connected to form a glimmering tunnel.

Above them was a sky of lilac lights. Elegant strings of lights were dangling from the archway. It was creating a vision of wisteria, as though they were walking under the elegant tree.

"It's beautiful," Kamui professes, nuzzling his head slightly. "Thank you for this." He feels the gentle hand on his waist giving him a reassuring squeeze.

"Kamui…" Subaru fawns over all of this. He attempts to take a break on their walk-through. By the looks of it, his boyfriend seems quite content to take little moments to go off the path.

Before he can do it though, or place another kiss on Kamui's sweet head-

"Ow!" A shrill cry escaped, along with the

sounding to be a young girl, high school age. She winced before, realizing her error, having run right against Kamui's side.

"Oh, sorry!" A young woman squeaked, bowing her head before walking off. "I just got so excited, I wasn't looking!"

Subaru hesitates to respond, mind only on Kamui. Though he doubts there was any harm, he can't help but ask. "Are you okay?"

"Mhm," Kamui hums. He turns towards the guilty-looking pair and waves his hand. "It's alright," he ensures warmly.

She looks towards a young man, shaking his head at her, and adding in his apology. They wander off, the girl still as energetic as ever.

There were more and more people entering the display. Subaru took Kamui off to the side, letting the more eager viewers go on ahead.

"It's more crowded than I imagined…" Subaru comments a bit of a frown. Groups of friends, families with small children and most of all countless couples were walking down the shopping center.

Crowds were enough as is… ones he would avoid if he weren't so enamored of the idea of a lover's first Christmas.

"It is," Kamui agreed with a hum. He could certainly feel far too many eyes on himself, his boyfriend, and them together. "We can just let them pass by…"

Looks of admiration and jealousy were always to come about such a beautiful couple. If he weren't used to the attention from Clamp school Kamui may act out. Well, he still really wanted to react to the sound of giggling students, admiring his boyfriend. But that might spoil the mood…

The pair stepped off to the side, viewing live trees surrounded by light strings of every color of the rainbow.

Having a little more space, they continued cozily down the path.

"But I'm very happy you brought me here," Kamui assured with a quick follow-up. He leaned upon his tiptoes, pressing his plush lips right to Subaru's cheeks.

Few curious onlookers remained, but Kamui could care less. So he lingered a bit, brushing his nose to his boyfriend's.

'It's good that others can know… you're all mine,' Kamui thought quite pleased with himself.

"Kamui?" Subaru asked, only slightly surprised at the action. 'We haven't really tried to hide it … or wanted to. '

Aside from the more mature aspects of their love, of course.

16-year-old Subaru Sumeragi would be concerned with how others would look at him. Being so lovey with anyone, let alone a boyfriend, seemed so very taboo.

Words never came easy, and accepting the fact he was attracted to men took a process.

But now, it came about more naturally. 'Nothing matters more than you…', certainly not the opinions of strangers.

And if his precious boyfriend wanted to stop along the way for little kisses, he felt no other desire but to follow through.

"I love you," Kamui sweetly whispers, as they begin to exit from their little lit-up love tunnel. "Thank you for this…"

"I love you too," Subaru assures, leaving countless kisses upon the shorter male's head. "I'm happy you enjoyed this. We still have time before our dinner reservations. We could see the shopping center nearby?"

"Okay," Kamui beamed gratefully.

Being outside the main display there was more room for them to simply be. The younger lover spotted something interesting.

With a confident smirk, Kamui guided his lover to walk over towards one of the trees.

Instantly, Kamui turned and leaned up as high as possible. His arms wrapped around his lover for a sweet, soothing kiss, this time directly on the lips.

There was just a slight delay in surprise. But feeling warm lips overtake him made this all seem right.

"Kamui?" Subaru questioned, not able to pull away just yet. Their lips were barely apart.

"Mistletoe," Kamui supplied the answer, pointing up to see the little plant dangling amongst one of the branches.

"Kamui, you don't need an excuse to kiss me," Subaru returned with the same light-hearted manner his lover had used.

"Oh? Now, doesn't this sound familiar…" Kamui purrs flirtatiously, happy to play along. Violet-blue gazed amorously into captivating gold-emerald orbs. Their eyes remained locked for that moment. The couple broke into a soft and comforting bit of laughter.

They embraced for a soft little moment. Their lips met and bid a very temporary goodbye. They returned to the shopping district which just days ago they could walk through with no problem.

There had to be at least three times the people walking around here.

"It's a lot busier than I imagined," Subaru admitted. His gaze shifted down before he continued grasping for his lover's hand, dangling down at his side.

"This is supposed to be one of the most popular spots in Tokyo," Kamui recalls, words of his classmates. Sure, enough he did notice several Clamp school classmates within the crowd. "I'm sure there are more people around the tree."

"Hm," Subaru studies his lover's face. There's a bit of eagerness and brightness in the way he looks back at the massive tree in the middle of the shops. "But would you still like to see it?"

"I don't like all the crowds too but…" Kamui pauses to bite his lips. "But it is Christmas Eve," His lips curve up and beam ethereally to his lover's eyes.

"That is true," Subaru agreed all too warmly.

"And," Kamui looked down so fondly at their joined hands. He clutched the hand in his own fondly, bringing their hands to rest upon his cheeks. He noticed countless other couples doing the same, seeming so warm and genuinely happy with love. "I would love a Christmas tree with my boyfriend."

"My Angel," Subaru coos, smiling in light and foolishly lovesick way. A look that ensured Kamui had seduced his lover's heart. "Let's go."

Hand in hand they made their way through the crowds. The same tree they had seen before seemed to shine even more beautifully.

The lights were at their brightest with a darker night sky than earlier. Reds, greens, gold, silver, and countless colored lights were draped from every branch to branch. The star on top seemed to dazzle a more brilliant gold than before.

The colorful, prop presents seemed to have multiplied for this evening.

Subaru's gaze couldn't stay on the tree for long enough. His eyes kept returning to see his lover's reactions. His heart settled upon focusing on the curve and parting of lips, and emotions within those eyes he loved. Stars danced breathtakingly, in soft violet-orbs.

The genuine light and hope Kamui reflects. All of it came over Subaru, like a bolt to the heart. Breathing seemed difficult.

"Subaru?" Kamui smiles so dreamily, it sparks something deep inside his lover. He glances back up, only to find a hand under his chin, and lips possessively stealing his own. Elegant fingers created a fan to shield their joined lips.

Even if they weren't fully alone. This moment still belonged purely to them. This kiss lingered on, far more than any others that night.

It helped Kamui's back was to the tree and his lover in front of him, frame covering him completely now. Now they both fell into it.

Their lips knew exactly how to meld, to move, part, and reunite for sweet addictive kisses. Occasionally, there was a tease of something more, taking one's breath away

This went on for how long…? Kamui blinked, a little dizzy from the sudden passion overcoming his love.

Still, his lover had the sense of time to lead them to their dinner reservation. Kamui indulged in this feeling of being led. He paused at the door, reaching for the handle but finding his hand swiped, and promptly kissed.

Before Kamui could ask why he found his boyfriend opening and holding the door for him.

"Thank you," Kamui professed, walking through the door and graciously waiting for his date to follow. 'Of course, my boyfriend remains ever the gentleman. ' How much of that was his upbringing or his natural personality.

'I'm lucky…' Kamui thinks, fondly, eyelids closing partway, watching his lover talking to their formally dressed hostess. Subaru took him by the hand, guiding them into a private corner all their own.

Subaru acts properly, pulling out Kamui's seat before he can even come to from his daydreaming.

"This place is…" Kamui gazes around getting a good look at the elegant restaurant. The crystal chandeliers, in the center, and vases of red and pink roses made for a perfect centerpiece. "You didn't have to…"

Much like the restaurant they went to at Clamp school, others were dressed in formal and

"I wanted to," Subaru reached his hand across the table. Gingerly he took Kamui's hand within his own.

"I… but still this place must be" A finger insistently pressed over his worried lips. The fact the menu didn't list prices told a lot.

"Please, don't worry, this is my choice, to take you here," Subaru insisted, firmly and not seeming to waver one bit. "And besides... There's nothing on this earth, able to measure up to what you give me."

While Subaru had told him plenty of embarrassing things… These words brought out a certain vulnerability. Subaru's cheeks painted a soft pink and his eyes returned to their menu.

``You're way too cute…" Kamui returns helplessly, knowing he'd be lost in his lover for the entirety of the holiday. And certainly far beyond that.

As they came to exit the restaurant, a chilling sensation took over. The cold itself wasn't too pleasant but…

"Wait, is that Snow?" Kamui glanced up towards the sky with enchantment. Even drops and snowflakes seemed bright, shimmering even beneath the night sky.

"It came in just in time," Subaru says before seeing his love shiver. Graciously he slips off his outer coat placing it over Kamui's shoulders. "But let's go home, we can watch the snowfall from there and warm up."

"Okay," Kamui's eyes glance down to see his hand being retrieved from its warm pocket. His lips gush noticing what his lover was doing. No matter how many hundreds… thousands of times… they did this. He couldn't nor wanted to fight this feeling.

'But… I don't think we have the same idea of 'warming up'... '

---

Christmas Cake

For a very specific reason, they had skipped any desserts at the restaurant. Kamui found butterflies returning to his stomach. After an evening of being treated to a Christmas date, now it was his turn to try and return that.

'All of that… with a cake.' Kamui ponders the absurdity of the thought. It wasn't the only gift he managed but… certainly the one taking the most energy.

The younger man takes the oversized coat off his shoulders. He hands it to his boyfriend to hang up on a rack. Meanwhile, Kamui slips off his boots entering into their comforting living room.

'Mrow! Their kitten greeted them, running over to Subaru first to brush against his legs.

"Hello, Hana, were you lonely?" Subaru kneels down sweetly, brushing around the pointy ears.

"She probably slept most of the time," Kamui reasoned aloud. He found the black cat glancing up at him curiously, and at least she returned to look over at her second owner.

"We have presents we'll give you soon," Subaru explained, as though to entice the small animal, waving towards a pile of cutely wrapped cat toys, even a stocking with the fish-like clamp school mascot stitched in front.

Their kitten seemed to like the idea judging by 'purrrr purrr' she emitted. Or perhaps, she simply loved hearing her owner's voice.

"I'm here too," Kamui lightly huffed, shaking his head. Hana does hear and acknowledges him, walking over to greet Kamui with an affectionate, 'mreow!.'

Subaru continued watching fondly as Kamui leaned down and picked the feline up. He reached out to brush his fingers through the kitten's soft black and white fur. He smiles seeing the feline lean into his touch as he begins petting around her ears.

'She always did favor Subaru…' Kamui thought, seeing the cat finally react to him as he began petting her ears. Violet orbs trail over to the kind-hearted man, who stole his heart after all seemed lost… 'I guess I do the same thing but still...'

The pair settled in, looking up at the clock. "We still have a time before it's officially Christmas," Midnight to be more precise. Kamui returned and anxiously pressed his lips together. "There's time to open gifts later… but I have something I think would be best now."

Subaru's breath hitches at the ethereal, sparkling smile on his lover's lips. Being lightly pushed to sit back on their couch, he handed their kitten, who instantly cuddled up.

"I hope you'll really like it," Kamui places a hand at the back of the sofa, beside his lover's head. He leans in to kiss his lover's temples, pausing there. The feeling of fingertips at his hips and hands wishing to pull him in is tempting… However, he has a mission ahead of him and turns on his heel toward the kitchen.

"I know I'll love everything from you," Subaru returns quietly, lost in this blissful warmth.

The words, while not uncommon, still brought a little relief to Kamui. He took a deep breath, opening their fridge to see their Christmas cake hidden behind many bags of colorful fruits and vegetables.

Kamui unveils the present, inspecting it carefully ensuring every strawberry and frosted swirl stays intact.

'Alright, now it's time,' Kamui reminds himself, taking the side and bottom of the covered cake plate into his arms.

A little uncertain, and slightly flushed, he returns to the living room. Immediately he's feeling loving eyes all over him.

"This is for you," Kamui stepped quietly over to where his lover was sitting. He took a seat to the side of Subaru, knees brushing against sleek hip bones.

"Merry Christmas, Subaru," Kamui professes with cherry red cheeks. Through the eyes of Subaru, his lips curl to a heavenly soft smile. Violet-blue glittering eyes are entrancing as they meekly look up at him before averting with some uncertainty.

Subaru kept his hands to the side, fighting the urge to hold Kamui tight and take them for a long and thoroughly enjoyable evening in their room.

But the stronger side of him, swept up in emotion and some sense knew this was not the time. He grasped his lover's hand, allowing Kamui to place the present on his lap. The younger man averted his eyes for a moment, nerves seeing in for his lover opens the plastic top admiring the dessert.

As soon as gold and emerald orbs glance upon the gift, they quiver. His heart stops, starts, and aches like nothing else.

Subaru holds up a finger to hover over the little sign on the cake and the words. "Kamui…" His lips curl to a melting smile, while he reads the cake sign. The precious, 'I love you' beneath the traditional "Merry Christmas", only makes his heart swell up.

"You made this for me?" Subaru responds in a sense of disbelief. This was not in surprise, Kamui made this but the fact that meant the younger man spent quite a bit of time and work creating this. His lips were unable to close after parting. He loses his breath a little, even more so as he looks up at his little patisserie who made this just for him.

"Of course, I did," Kamui ensures, nodding vigorously, eyebrows furrow. "For you…" He nudges the cake closer to his lover. His lips slip down, unsure if the silence should make him feel praised or uncertain. "Do you like it?"

"Kamui," He pauses, finger gliding over every perfect swirl of icing his lover designed. "I knew anything you'd make would be wonderful, and… you always find a way to amaze me."

The request he gave was intended to be simple, easy on Kamui. However, by the perfectly crafted pipings on top, freshly cut strawberries, and perfect icing around, it took time. Kamui was always capable, but he never intended to make his lover feel the need to go above and beyond. He couldn't imagine the time his lover spent, with a tremendous amount of work and practice to look this flawless.

"I love this," Subaru ensures, kissing the uncertain frown across from him into a loved-up smile.

"Sorry, I just seeing this made me realize…all the time you must have spent," Dual-toned eyes swirled and glistened. A watery flow rose just above his eyelids. He held back from getting lost. "I can't imagine how much work this took… *Carefully, he places the beautiful dessert on the table before them. He occupies his arms by wrapping around his lover. His arms close in around Kamui for an incredibly intimate embrace.

"You are perfect, Kamui."

The emotions ring so strongly, his arms scoop Kamui up until his lover is practically in his lap.

Subaru buries his face in the crook of his lover's neck, breathing in the scent that was so incredibly Kamui. There are a few warm drops of emotion falling down Kamui's neck.

"Subaru…" Kamui comforts, rubbing circles and gentle motions on his lover's back. He buried the fingers of his other hand through Subaru's soft lock, noticing the glints of a deep green among the raven-black hue.

'You always… do so much while thinking of me… ' It didn't need to be anywhere near perfect or at such a level, but Kamui always did so. Not just today, no the countless meals and treats Kamui made for him spoke of that. As did everything his lover had given to him, to bring him out of the darkness he'd been drowning in for so long.

"You ah… still need to taste it," Kamui reminds his lover, whose lips begin exploring all around his neck and throat. Those kisses don't stay innocent.

'Not yet,' Kamui holds back for them both. He places his hands on his lover's shoulders guiding him back."Um but… wait…" Kamui nervously laughs as he plays with the hair behind his ear.

"Ah, I guess I got a little carried away," Subaru returns but insists on planting one last kiss on the slender neck before letting Kamui go.

"I'll be right back," Kamui disappears into the kitchen. He releases a long-held breath. feeling relief wash over him at his lover's emotional reaction.

As stated before he returned quickly to the adjacent room, utensils in hand.

"At least allow me this much," Subaru insists, grasping the dull side of the cake knife and utensils.

"Alright," Kamui watches with a sense of awe. Perhaps, those neck kisses were the culprit. Just looking at his fingers… is kinda-

He shakes his head. 'I have it way too bad…'

Still, even the way his lover sliced the cake seemed so graceful. Carefully, he slips the slice of cake onto a plate.

"It looks incredible," Subaru praises, eyes dazzling. He takes a fork to retrieve a small piece and attempts to hold it to Kamui's lips first.

"No, no, it's for you," Kamui laughs heart fluttering. He takes the fork, reversing their positions. Subaru smiles, feeling white icing gloss over his lips.

Lips part only to savor and indulge in what had to be the best dessert he's ever tasted. Subaru closes his eyes, feeling the perfectly fluffy texture of the cake, the coolness of the strawberries, and the sweetness of the icing. A perfect blend.

"Does it taste good?" Kamui was feeling optimistic. His lover, practically moaning at the very taste, made Kamui flush. The hand on the top of his leg made the situation worse.

"It's incredible," Subaru finally responds with nothing but sincerity within his eyes. Starting to become more than a little gone on him… he boldly implies. "You should taste it too."

"You still need to try more for yourself," Kamui tries, it was a small sample too.

An insistent hand cradles the back of Kamui's head, bringing their lips to press, a little icing left on eager lips stains the front of Kamui's lips.

The sudden kiss makes him gasp. A sweetened tongue pushes and dives deep into Kamui's mouth, enticing him to follow along. He does so, tasting the sweetness of icing, cake, and strawberries adding to his lover's already addicting taste.

Kamui is the one to break it despite loving the kiss, softening them gradually. 'We both know where this kind of kissing leads…' His incredibly amorous, made it difficult to think.

"Ah, I-I'm glad you like it," Kamui stumbles against eager lips. Ones that take him in pulling him into a loving abyss.

"I love this… and," Subaru's voice grows a bit more low and husky, he gives his lover obvious bedroom eyes. With a seductive swipe of his tongue, he licks any remaining icing off the plush lips. "Your taste."

Kamui squirms in his seat, pressing his legs together hard, at the insinuation. 'Shit… now I… already want to do it. ' But he wanted Subaru to indulge a little more. To see the smile and reactions from all the gifts.

"W-wait a second," Kamui insists, breaking apart and scooping up another bite onto the fork. "You could at least finish the slice…"

Subaru chuckles, restraining himself from going further.

"You're right…" Subaru returns a little guilty. He swallows a bit hard, reigning himself in whole closing his eyes. He turns to Kamui apologetically. "I got carried away…."

Kamui could know he wasn't the only one who had it bad right now.

"No, no," Kamui's honesty comes out, touching his heated cheeks. "I like when you're like this…. But I think we should finish exchanging gifts before…" He fake coughs into his hand, and gestures towards their decorated tree.

Opening gifts now may be best...Kamui reigns himself in, pushed forward at the thought of his love reacting to everything he gave. 'And besides…' of them would be coming back downstairs for quite some time after….

Subaru and Kamui work on cooling things down, turning on the television to play holiday movies in the background. They finish their slice of cake, albeit more innocently.

Arriving at their tree, Kamui eagerly grasps for one of the gifts. The rectangular present is wrapped in beautiful golden paper.

Graciously, Subaru accepts, pecking his lover's lips. Gingerly, those fingers open the gift, not wishing to cause a tear with the gift his lover spends time wrapping up.

'You're always so…' Subaru finds his heart struck again. He holds out the deep emerald-painted frame. The color of his lover's well natural eyes… always seemed to come to mind. Words, 'The one Love' were embedded into the frame with a soft lilac hue. The photo in the center made Subaru's heart tug. A photo to bring memories… he could look back on without the pain.

"You're wonderful," Subaru scoops up Kamui to sit in his lap, holding it before them both. "I knew there was a reason you suddenly wanted a photo before. …"

This one features the couple cuddled up on their couch together. Kamui rests his head upon his boyfriend's shoulder. Their eyes look not towards any camera but to one another and only each other.

"I love this…" Subaru marveled over this gift, kissing the back of a very sensitive sentiment here was special. "So so much."

The kisses after this hadn't really stopped. Even as they continued to exchange more gifts.

Subaru had preferred opening the gifts with Kamui in his lap, in front of him, peppering kisses all the way. He had to kiss Kamui more fully at the sight of the night sky projector, which was well crafted obviously having some expense.

"I want you to open your gifts as well," Subaru politely insisted, letting his lover slip from his hold to kneel and grab some of the many many presents.

Subaru smiles at the way Kamui naturally comes back to his 'seat' resting back against him.

Every new manga, anime, light novel, and collective Kamui took interest in was graciously placed under that tree.

"Even the special editions," Kamui spoke in awe of his lover's generosity. About every series he could think of was under the tree by the time he finished unwrapping. Truly he would indulge in them… when he had less pressing needs to attend to.

"You definitely spoil me so much…." Kamui fully purrs, at the overcoming feeling.

The few mystical and spiritually themed gifts… hardly seem to equate to everything. But Subaru looked anything but discontented. He treasured every present here. As well as the kisses which grew more insistent.

'I hadn't expected hickies… as we were opening gifts… ' Kamui couldn't complain, nor deny he enjoyed the spontaneous affection.

It was only natural, though…. The feeling from earlier was becoming more persistent. Unable to be ignored.

"Subaru?"

"What? Was there something else you wanted?"

The mood was so very comforting and light.

"Not a technical present… " Kamui turned around in his lover's lap. "but…" He pressed their lips together hard. Further, making his point through the way his hips shifted over the growing need.

"Let's continue this… upstairs then…" Subaru suggested the confirmation in Kamui's eyes. He wasted not another second, scooping his lover up bridal style

ascending the stairs.

X1999

Only For You

They did at least make it to their bedroom. But then there was a change in plans. Subaru frowned, sitting on the edge of the bed. I hadn't expected that.

'I still have something… just for you.' Kamui recalls before this moves further. Thinking back it would have been better to vocalize. He places his hand out flat on his lover's chest, giving them space.

"Not just yet," Kamui responded and without another word scooped up something red, and vanished into their bathroom.

'Now I'm definitely doing this…' Kamui stripped himself completely, blushing at how reactive a few kisses could make him.

Gradually, violet eyes slipped under pale eyelids. He bit down his lip, mind full of his boyfriend and all the beautiful reactions he could bring. The way Subaru gazes at him, the way he touches, kisses, and all of this makes him burn much hotter.

The younger man knew he had to strip down first and it might be better not to take too long.

While embarrassing he couldn't help but think of his hands right now being that of his lover's, slightly larger with long fingers that could make him see stars.

Kamui raised his arms, removing the sweater and shirt underneath, up and over his head. Both items fell to the floor and he continued. Slipping down his trousers had been a bit more embarrassing.

He could feel a bit of dampness inside the front. His boxers were in complete disarray, the white stain looking as though he came completely under his lover's kisses. While almost true… at least he could say he held on that much.

A breath of relief filled while his hardness was free from its confines. Finally, the main part of this seduction involved taking a long deep red dress shirt. One Subaru wor just the other day.

Anxious and eager fingers fumbled a bit with unbuttoning and buttoning up the one garment over his body. He left a few top buttons undone, in case his lover needed more access. The feeling of skin-on-skin contact was really like nothing else.

This shirt wasn't exposed like those seductive ribbons or some kind of lingerie his friend teased him about. If that was a joke…

But this felt like something Subaru would like to see if he didn't deny himself so much. The difference between their body frames added a bit more to the seduction. His boyfriend's wrapped around him with ease and hung down his legs.

"Subaru, I'm done," Kamui announces his return, biting his lip as he slowly turned the knob of the bathroom.

"Kamui, I-" Subaru swallowed hard, mouth going completely dry since looking up. His precious lover stepped into their bedroom, looking to be something right out of fantasies, only even more amazing.

Even the festive theme was a bit there, with Kamui returning wearing one of Subaru's red dress shirts. While the younger man even thought of teasing the explanation, he felt his boyfriend might not be able to focus on details right now

Subaru licked his lips, attempted to stand up before he felt his lover's on the top of his chest. But this only made Kamui that much more effective, as he could touch the sensitive thighs underneath the cloth.

"Subaru," Kamui begins, waltzing over to his lover in the most sultry manner he could imagine, hips swaying. Finally, Kamui stepped right in front of where his lover was sitting.

He had been anxious judging by the reaction this was as successful. Hands reached out to touch him almost immediately.

Subaru swallowed hard eyes raking in every inch of his sensual silky clothing, his clothing is the only thing left to cover his beautiful beloved. The younger man held a private smile aimed his way. The violet of his eyes seemed to wish to swallow Subaru whole. His lover, legs bare save for the hem of the long shirt, made for an enchanting sight. The way the red fabric covers midway to Kamui's inner thighs was addicting.

While nerves before had been over getting a good reaction, he faced a new problem. As of now, his heart screamed for another reason. Gold and emerald eyes were absolutely boring to him, heated, darkened, and dilated at everything they could see.

His lover went completely hard within seconds of seeing this sight. By the looks of it ready to penetrate him any second. Thinking this lewdly, Kamui reddened further.

'Or maybe… I'm way too turned on. '

A possessive thrill raced through Subaru's core. When Kamui at last, came upon the bed with him, he groaned in protest to the tease. The young seducer brushed their pelvic areas while his hips moved, the body just barely grazing over his lap.

"I want you," Kamui whispers seductively, gently pushing his older lover to lie back. He climbed to straddle the active hips. While intended to be done slowly, hands began impatient, removing what was left of Subaru's clothes. "Very much…"

Subaru reached for his young lover, feeling up the soft inner thighs and soft backside.

Seducing, seemed successful but going further was not, as hands became more possessive and impatient. The squeezes and kisses simultaneously being pampered on his body made Kamui weak. So he bit his lips, faltering while his lover sat up to catch him, keeping him close.

The kisses here held and began with sweet love boiling over to a wilder passion. But they weren't simply hard or hot. They were almost bruising and searing.

"Sub-mmmph." He couldn't get a word in, at this rate, realizing he awakened something a bit more primal in his lover with the copious methods of teasing.

The tongue in Kamui's mouth took a very dominant approach, as did his lover's hands over his body. Only the briefest breaks for air were given.

Passionate and needy lips kept melding, claiming and sucking over Kamui's own. The younger man did his best to fully reply.

"Ahh~ Su-" Yet, the smaller male found their positions changed in an instant. Subaru lifted Kamui from his lap, only to roll them over. The younger man was deposited into the pillow, now lying on his back.

Subaru did look towards him for assurance approval. There was still control, but there was confidence and drive tonight as his lover followed through with his actions. A beautiful combination that Kamui loved.

'I meant to do all the work here… ' Yet, this didn't seem an option just yet.

But love could bring on the best things unexpectedly.

Hands pinned his own down onto the bed. Lips claimed, explored, and ravished every inch they could come across.

Preparation felt even hotter than before. A passionate and lustful blur, left Kamui's eyes to tear, pleasure overflowing.

' And we haven't even…'

Just as the thought came to, he saw his lover lathering himself with a good portion of lubricant. One that softened the walls inside Kamui's entrance, with just a few fingers.

He swallowed a bit hard. Subaru leaned down, stealing Kamui's lips for a moment. Before looking uncertain.

"Kamui, can I-"

His lover didn't let him finish. Kamui leaned back up, capturing those troublesome lips from worrying further.

"Yes, anything," He ensures with a fire burning in his eyes. Kamui followed by kissing all across his lover's face. He whispers, "Anything you want… Consider this… my gift to you."

The younger male finds himself falling into a receptive position. His legs were lifted not to rest or wrap around Subaru, but up much higher. Kamui's slender legs were brought up and placed to lay upon his boyfriend's shoulders.

This position…. Definitely qualified as one of Kamui's more embarrassing fantasies… but the fact his lover chose this, made his heart flutter, while the heat in his body skyrocketed.

"I'm going to start," Subaru offers the 'warning', even while knowing they were both a little too far gone. The older lover angled himself perfectly and carefully before entering from a deeper position. He slid himself in as carefully as he could manage.

Kamui nodded at him, completely certain. He ensures by lifting his hips and spreading his legs the best he could in this position.

"Kamui…" Subaru sinks deeper and deeper until he's filled his lover completely. His hips impulsively thrust up a little into the heat, even a slight movement being felt so much more, incredibly deep.

"Oh, that's…. " Kamui's head fell back towards the pillows. "Please…" He rocked his hips hoping to sink further into this abyss.

"Yes, Kamui," Subaru smiled blissfully at his lover. He leaned down on impulse to kiss soft lips, only to move deeper and terribly sensitive angles.

"Subaru!" Kamui calls for him, going breathless. "I need you!" Desperately, the smaller man reached his arms up and out as far as possible, reaching.

Subaru gladly complied with his wishes, leaning down closer on top of Kamui, keeping their lips further locked as they reached such a threshold of pleasure. And, those kisses keep enticing them both further.

Before Subaru begins to fully move, he pauses. Kisses soften and slow down, completely indulgent. An angelic smile falls over Subaru's lips.

"My beautiful Kamui, my angel," Subaru's eyes are not blinded by the fog of lust. Very soft and subtle tears fall, only to be held back. "I will treasure this gift for the rest of my life."

These last words before Kamui's heard before becoming fully lost. A promise which struck Kamui in the heart like a bolt of lightning. The tone and fact it was Subaru indicate this vow went much further than 'just' the sex.

Every single touch, kiss, and thrust seemed only that much hotter and boiling with so much passion.

"Subaru! I'm-" Everything went blank, a passionate sea of white flooded Kamui's vision, at the first initial thrusts…

"I am too, Kamui, it's alright," Subaru comforted at his best, continuing to build up the passion and heat between their bodies. Perfectly connected and becoming one, they continued further…faster and completely deep- one feeling overcame him.

"Subaru!"

"Kamui!"

With a sharp cry of each other's names, they reached a blissful state, riding out every millisecond of pleasure between them.

"I love you Kamui," Subaru told his lover, desperately before slipping from his control. He managed at least this before taking them both to a state of euphoria.

"I-I love you too…." Kamui breathed before coming completely undone. He was certain he screamed somewhere between his wild moans and mewls. The final feeling of his lover coming so deep inside… brought those same emotions out. They loved together for as long as both could manage.

They may have lost themselves for even longer than planned. The world around them disappeared, every ounce of pain, nightmares, and heartache… that didn't exist right here. Tonight was a night completely theirs…

As Subaru requested they made it well into Christmas. Giving and receiving everything that was desired.

Subaru collapsed on top of Kamui shortly after, completely spent. He mumbled an apology, but Kamui hugged him tighter. The younger male embraced the warm figure on top of him.

He carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. So he was more than capable and actually happy to carry the weight of the person he loves… as many times as needed.

They remained so tenderly together, fully connected. As full as Kamui felt, he wasn't quite ready to part. Neither had been… for some time they remained lost here.

"Merry Christmas Kamui," Subaru returned, gradually rolling off his lover coming off from the high.

Post-coital emotions brought this feeling further.

"Merry Christmas… my Subaru," Kamui returned, sleepily, eyes blinking. He falls into a peaceful slumber.

For tonight and hopefully many years to come, they enjoyed the bliss.

/End/

---

Thank you for reading. The next chapter will be a bit more angst/hurt comfort. I have this idea along with a few other stories that the promised year- and the decisive battle would be at the end of the year/1999. But this will bring bittersweet emotions. It's the day he got Subaru back into his life, but… also the day he lost his former love interest and best friend….

So there will be some emotions. Subaru is a sweetheart and can comfort Kamui like no one else can. Of course, his lack of self-worth and insecurities can get in the way for himself-especially with the person he loves mourning a former love….but it will work out… the new year can bring new and good change.

It's weird writing Christmas when I'm thinking Valentine's Day prompts and such but it is how it goes with the series' timeline. But that will come about too. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I will see you for the next :)