Crimson Rain

by The God Slayer

Decades after the planet has finally known peace, through great sacrifice and struggle, something ancient and sinister stirs beneath the surface. A mad man rises with power the world thought was extinct and declares war on the planet, igniting a turn in history millenniums in the making.

6. Fantasy

Notes: Yes, as you should have (or might have) noticed by now, some chapters switch between solid POVs as in you only get in Emma's view and then others have multiple POVs in one instance, as if it from the eye of "god", this is to give the audience a better chance to look into both characters at once at crucial moments of their relationship.

Oh, anyways, enjoy and please read the end for an announcement. :)

Fantasy
(It Ain't Me Babe)

It had only been a month and a half since the last letter arrived detailing the last known location of the crowned prince and where he had gone missing. By then small snippets of news managed to make it back to the mainland in the form of letters and soldiers her father sent back in the highest forms of security for her mother and remaining generals, but as a daughter and princess, and the youngest, she was not permitted to know the secrets and details of that information.

It surprised Emma to know though that not even Benjamin had been told the information in the letters and news flowing into the country, and in a way it felt nice to know she was for once not the only one being excluded from important things, but she knew that eventually this was going to backfire somehow.

In those days though, she spent her time with Cadence and Alexander, though almost entirely so with the later. Cadence would visit her and they would read quietly sometimes for hours, or she would pop in with baskets of snacks and they would talk about so many different things, like what her brothers were like when they were younger, what life was like in Figaro, and sometimes even what Alexander was like when he was younger. As rare as that was. Emma found that to be a great treat to hear whenever it came up, and when it was over, she found herself wishing to know more. Other times the woman would help her with her physical therapy whenever her mother could not for whatever reasons—as it was becoming more common for her mother to be around the generals more and more, in her father's place—and teach her new ways to style her hair (though it was difficult for her to do by herself) and tell her about the cultural differences in Maranda.

And sometimes, the woman would try to get her to speak about her assault. Emma knew she would try. She knew everyone eventually would. She didn't understand why they wanted her to talk about it so much, but she understood that Cadence meant no harm by it. So she just avoided it the best that she could. Whenever the subject was approached, in any way, she would change the subject or go very quiet. Eventually Cadence would get the picture, or the tone or the indication that the discussion was not what was expected, and would stop.

It wasn't like Emma didn't wish to be honest with her. Cadence was kind, and sweet and compassionate and strong and everything that Emma herself was not. If there was someone, other than her mother, that Emma truly wished she could find the courage to speak to about her assault, it would be with Cadence. And yet, she never could. There would always be something in her way, whatever it was.

It was for Alexander though that she found her honesty easier to give to, whenever he was around of course, which was proving to be a rarer thing than it was before. She was thankful though, because before he was never around, now he found time every other day to visit her.

This young man made her very nervous, and yet she knew he made her very happy at the same time. Whenever he was around her, she felt warm and safe and happy. It was indescribable, and yet every day she tried to fight through the haze in her mind for the right words to stick to the feeling in her heart.

All that he had to do to make her feel this way were such silly little things too, a smile here, a touch on the arm there, say her name in that odd way of his, call her 'little angel' or 'sweetest princess', or bring her over some books from the library, even without her asking. It was just about anything and everything that he did, whether it was for her or not.

And no matter what, she was very conscious of that fact, and she could not stop expressing herself like a complete idiot around him. Her need to be perfect in his eyes escalated with each and every day. It made her more nervous than before. She stuttered and fumbled and repeated herself far more than usual, to the point that she wouldn't make any sense unless she stopped and took a minute to collect herself, but he would only smile at her patiently and wait. It was slowly driving her insane.

Soon enough she tried to fight back replying to him to avoid looking like some fool, but whenever he looked at her and waited for an answer to whatever it was he had asked or said, she would burn up and begin her idiotic displays anew. He would simply laugh and smile, and sensing her unease, tell her he loved her reactions when she was flustered. And of course, that would only set her off more.

How should she even react to that? What did he mean by it?

And from time to time, he would tease her with reminders about the dates she owned him, but what was worse to her was the reminders that she had asked him to Claim her back at the Antlion race. Though she knew he was only teasing her, that he only saw her as a child, it made her all the more happy. To hear such words from such a kind, handsome man, who clearly should be looking towards more beautiful and older women, made her feel like she was finally worth something to someone else.

In between her time spent with Cadence and Alexander, whenever her mother managed to slip away from her duties to see her and tend to her, or even bring her out of her room to break her fast or convince her to eat sweets with her in the kitchen. Thankfully for Emma though, her mother had stopped entirely trying to get her to speak about her assault. Instead her focus was now entirely on her improvements, physically and mentally, and sometimes would often over press with her questions, though Emma didn't mind it.

In those days though, if her brother managed to bump into them and start something with Emma, her mother was quick to put her foot down over her son's abusive verbal behavior however she had to. Sometimes, that would surprise her, because her mother's temper would be struck and she would start to scream and if you knew her mother, she hardly ever shouted.

When his behavior became more common though, Emma began to refuse her mother's requests to leave her room more and more, which she knew would upset her mother. However, she would rather avoid her brother and the potential of completely ruining her relationship with Benjamin than spending a little extra time with her mother outside her room. It was a good enough trade off for her.

The days were starting to get cold and as they grew darker faster, her mother also began pestering her with questions, sometimes not even being indirect, about things she might desire, such as books or instruments or art supplies, and Emma knew. Her mother was preparing for the winter solstice celebration. However, there wasn't a part of her that could pull the courage to even say anything to her mother about it, and another part of her that felt foolish for even wishing to. She was nearing four and ten, no longer a child, and would surely need to put the celebration behind her. Only children received gifts like that. And if she wanted to convince her mother and brothers, and most of all Alexander, that she was no longer that stupid, gullible child, she needed to act like it.

So she told her mother every time she asked that she had nothing to ask for and that she was okay with receiving nothing, and sometimes she would even try to avoid the questions altogether, a little tired with answering the same thing over and over again. Eventually her mother stopped asking, and Emma's nerves eased from the edge they were nearing.

One morning Cadence appeared with fresh fruits and a smile, and Emma knew. The woman had something to discuss with her. If Emma knew anything from her time spent with her brother's woman, it was that Cadence was often the agent of one of their mothers whenever she had food or gifts in hand.

As the woman walked into the room to find a place for the fruits, Emma wondered on what it could be that her mother wanted out of her now. Could it be that her mother did not stop thinking she could get her to speak about Luke and the others? Emma felt a tightness in her chest. I thought she gave up on that...

You are surrounded by the memory of it no matter what you do, her voice said through a hiss. Not even your mother can let you forget.

Emma sat quietly on the edge of her bed and stared at her feet tiredly. Perhaps her voice was right. Perhaps her family didn't want her to forget. Perhaps not even the gods wished for her to. Was it also part of her punishment to always remember? She wanted to cry, but she used all of her strength not to with Cadence there.

The kind woman sat the basket of fruit down on the dresser by the bed and then turned to smile at the princess with that beautiful, stunning smile. "I haven't seen you in a couple days...for that I'm terribly sorry. I've been helping your mother with a few errands, and then my mother needed me to run a few tasks for her as to not bother anyone around the court. It is not excuse, I just thought you should know why I have been away for so long."

Emma withheld a sniff. "That's okay..." you don't owe me anything anyway. No one does. "Alexander h-has been here, so I've h-had company." That made an elegant eyebrow arch and an amused expression shift over the woman's face, but Emma missed it entirely. "May...may I ask w-what you have b-been doing for my m-mother?"

Cadence's smile never vanished. "Oh, odd end tasks, such as retrieving and delivering documents and the like. Boring things, but important in their way. Why do you ask?" Emma shrugged. She was hoping news had come in about her brother, but she didn't want to upset Cadence or her mother by asking directly about it. That didn't seem to work though, because Cadence understood why immediately. Her smile vanished. "Oh."

Sometimes, Emma wondered how Cadence could be so calm and collected while Cambyses was lost or worse. How did she manage it? "Emma, listen to me," she knelt in front of Emma and took one of her hands. "I know this situation looks so bleak, but I feel it in my heart that Cambyses lives, I do. Your father will find him, and if he doesn't, your brother will find his own way home."

Finally, the tears broke free and Emma could not stop her cries. "What...what if he can't?" she sobbed.

Cadence soothed her with gentle words and brushed a hand over her cheek. "Your brother is strong Emma, stronger than any man that I know. This is not his end. He will stand again, taller than he did before, just you wait and see." Cadence glanced around the room and then said, "What did Kaedus the Conqueror say about Figaro men after his attempt to conquer the land, Emma?"

Sniffing, Emma rubbed at her nose. "He said that no storm could rend them..."

"And what did Kaedus the Conqueror attempt to do to William the First that led him to say these things?" she asked softly.

Emma wasn't sure what Cadence's goal was in the walk down the history lesson, but Emma obliged her. "He laid siege to Valon..."

"And?" she pressed.

"He could not even b-b-breach the walls," she said. "William the First held Kaedus' forces at the walls, even t-t-though he was outnumbered..."

"And he won," Cadence finished. "He rode out onto the field with a fierceness that Kaedus had never seen before in a warrior, a man who had conquered so many lands with ease. Do you know why Figaro's sigil is a lion?"

Emma nodded. "Because of William's appearance..."

Cadence smiled. "No, not entirely," she said. "It wasn't because of William himself that the start of the Figaro House took the lion as their sigil." the woman reached into the pocket of her blouse and recovered a little piece of cloth. Emma watched curiously. The cloth was a worn piece of clothing, with a faded lion sigil on a field of red. Emma recognized it. She had seen her brother wear it in Thamasa quite a few times. It had been his squire outfit. "The reason the Figaro House took the lion as their sigil was not specifically because of William, not entirely, but on the day of that victory...when William had defeated Kaedus, do you know what the Conqueror was reported to have said?" Emma shook her head.

"He looked into William's summer blue eyes and the eyes of his brothers and at their beaten gold hair, and said, 'The blood of lions run through your blood.' and then he sat his sword at their feet. For a man of the Western Empire, this was the greatest act of respect a man could give. William the First granted Kaedus mercy and signed peace with him, and that was the start of the Figaro monarchy. Your House started that day, and Figaro came from the bricks of Valon, and your ancestors took the lion as their sigil to honor that day." Cadence stood and pressed the worn cloth into the princess' hands. "And Kaedus was right Emma. You and your brothers...you have the blood of lions in you. You are stronger than the rest of us, fiercer and kinder, so I do not for one moment believe that your brother has met any unkind fate. The gods would never tolerate his path diverting like that. I know it. You must know it too."

Emma looked down at the faded sigil through teary stricken eyes. She closed her hands around the cloth and looked up at Cadence with a small smile. "Thank you Cadence...thank you."

"You brood about so intensely I feel it is my duty now to set it straight," she teased with a wink, which made Emma blush heavily. She must be a terrible bore, always moping about. Cadence had more reason than her to be sad and depressed, and yet she was up and about, courageous and spirited and hopeful. "Oh! That reminds me, the reason I'm here."

Emma sighed. So there was a reason. "Did my mother send you?"

"Yes, she most certainly did, but heavens, don't turn into a ghost on me just yet," she said with a chuckle. "I'm just here to get gift ideas out of you, despite you trying to convince your mother that you are not in desire of anything. We both know that is not true. Why are you telling your mother that?"

Emma released her breath. That was what this was about? The solstice celebration? Gift giving? Not her assault? She felt like she could laugh simply from the relief. And yet... "Cadence, honestly, there isn't anything..."

"Hush now, do not pester me with your dishonesty," she said, sounding very serious in her warnings as she pointed a finger. "You know how much your mother adores you, or you should, and for a mother...this celebration is joyous. Especially so for Terra, who has lost so much time with you due to your illness and time on Thamasa. Do not push her away because you are upset over something or feeling like you can't ask for something because you are 'too old' or some other silly reason. I am not going to stand for it."

Emma felt like she had been chided by Relm. She wanted to crawl under a rock. It was humiliating. "But—"

"Ah ah ah, none of that!" she cut in sharply. "Even should it be so that you earnestly have no idea on what to ask for, ask for something, anything. Just give your mother something. If only to make her feel better. I know this part of this thing is harder for you to understand Emma and I, and no one else, will ever blame you for it but...you need to put yourself in her position. Her son is missing, her daughter has recently been hurt in a very traumatic way and is currently very reclusive and refuses to speak with her and her last son is currently behaving out in a manner I dare not be honest about. If you cannot find it in yourself to do something for your mother simply because it could make her happy out of your own will, fine, but I shall make you if I have to."

Emma was staring wide eyed at the woman, completely lost half way through the conversation but most entirely stunned. "Cadence, I—"

"Yes or no Emma," she cut in again. "However, if it is a no, I shall make it be a yes."

She blinked dumbly. "Okay..."

Cadence clapped her hands happily and giggled. "Perfect! Now, I will give you some time to think of something, though I'd prefer you think of a few things to ask for, and then I will return to jot them down. Do not take long. The celebration is in two weeks and I will be returning in a fortnight."

"Returning?" Emma cut in, quickly standing up, which caused her to stumble a little. "W-Where are you going?"

"I am leaving with my father for a short while. We must head out to Narshe with Setzer and pick up a large cache of supplies, and then I have to return to Maranda to pick up a few things for my mother, but don't you worry Emma. I will be back shortly. You won't even miss me...not with Alexander lurking about your room again anyhow." her tone and teasing smile made Emma's cheeks burn.

She stammered and looked away. "I'd...I'd still miss you..."

Cadence giggled at the girl's lack of even trying to deny the impact Alexander's presence would bring her. "I believe you," she walked over and kissed the girl's cheeks. "I will be back. In the mean time Emma...think on it. Do not disappoint me, girl." and then she hugged her and was off.

••••••••••••

It was completely obvious to Cadence what was happening to Emma the more she checked in on the girl and was regaled, often times unintentionally, by accounts of her time spent with Alexander. She had witnessed the girl's infatuation move to a crush swiftly, like the breaking of a damn, and was witnessing it tear through the land, forming into something it could not be allowed to.

The look in her eyes when she speaks of him, Cadence thought as she walked quietly down the halls, feeling pitiful and sad, and yet strangely excited for the girl. Now that she knew the girl was aware she felt something for Alexander, it was unavoidable that they would talk about it. So far, Emma had brought it up two more times since first revealing it, and each time it had been very short and to the point, and mostly focused around advise on what to perceive of his actions or words. And so far, what she had asked about were simple things that any person who had been around others wouldn't have thought much about, but Cadence knew Emma's upbringing, from being so isolated from others, had made her what she was today.

Why? she thought tiredly. Why couldn't she have found some sweet little lord-in-waiting from nearby with cute curly hair she could latch onto, who could be sweet and stammering and yet make her blush and feel like a princess? Why did she have to turn her eyes to Alexander? To charming, unreliable, unsure Alexander? She sighed. She knew why. It was because Alexander was kind and compassionate, and he clung to her in ways that no boy ever did, but what was more, it was clear he made her feel safe and wanted, and he paid her attention in special ways. In ways she wanted Luke to, but had been violated her for instead. She had found trust in Alexander, and that was too difficult for her now to easily give to others.

And trying to separate them earlier to give her time to weaken her crush had done nothing but strength it. Her plan had backfired on her.

What made her trust him though? Cadence tried to think on it. Something had to have happened that made her latch onto him initially and think she could put her trust and honesty into him when she couldn't into others, not even with her family. If Cambyses were still around, she could ask him if he knew if anything particular happened between the two, but he was not. That made her a little more depressed. You better not die on me, Camb. I need you...your sister needs you.

It was no matter right now. Thinking too much on it wasn't going to solve anything. She needed to gather her things and be on her way so she could make it back in time to get that list from Emma for Terra. However, on her way to the residential area of the castle, she bumped right into the queen standing quietly by herself in the corridors. She was observing the festival decorations with a look of longing.

Cadence couldn't leave her like that.

"Terra? Is something the matter?"

"Hm? Oh, no, dear, no...I—I was just thinking about when the boys were younger. The winter solstice meant everything to them when they were kids and I had the chance to put smiles on their faces."

"I see..." she couldn't find the words to try and cheer the queen up. Not being able to spoil your children, to give them everything they wanted, must be hard. The thought led to Emma and she wondered just what the girl did on the festival days when she had no family to celebrate it with. And then Cadence realized that was probably another issue eating at the queen. "Terra, you know she doesn't blame you, right?"

The queen looked at her with tear ridden eyes. "I am to blame though," she croaked. "I should have kept her here with me. I shouldn't have sent her away because of who and what she is. It was a mistake, but...but I couldn't chance anything. I—I—I didn't want them to hurt her."

Cadence knew very well who "they" were. The only people who could actually hurt the girl. The council. "Terra, you saved your daughter's life. You sacrificed seeing your daughter grow in order to give her a life. The only thing you are to be blamed for is losing the time you have now."

The queen smiled at her and rubbed away her tears. "Now? I couldn't get a single festival request from her and judging by your expression, you couldn't either. She's so difficult...and now the day is nearing and I am clueless on what to give her when I know her little heart yearns for much. She asks for so little, especially lately, and now she will be without this celebration...again." she brushed tears away with a sigh.

Cadence put a hand on her shoulder and smiled. "You said it yourself Terra. Emma is difficult. I have never met a person like her before. She is absolutely irritatingly smart and exceptionally stubborn, but yet incredibly odd and a chatterbox at the same time. It is a pair I never seen before, so don't you dare feel any bit sad for trying to get her something she hasn't ask you for yet. You are trying your best in a difficult situation. That is all that anyone can do. For now, focus on just taking care of her and giving her the space she asks of you when asks of it." when she actually got the list of things from the princess, it would be a different thing. She could deliver that to the queen and lift her spirits, but at the moment she didn't want to give the queen false hope only for Emma to later refuse to deliver on her desired gifts.

"That doesn't seem like a g-good thing for a mother to do," she said, unsure. "What...what if she thinks that I love the boys more because I did more for them when they were her age?"

"Your sons were easier for the simple reason that men are simple creatures. There is a reason dealing with them is a lot easier than dealing with a teenage daughter. The daughter will battle you tooth and nail, rebel and act out more because she's got more in her head to express. Men see the world in black and white, and women see it in all shades and hues. This is especially so for Emma, who probably sees the world in ways no one else can."

"I—I don't understand."

Cadence laughed. "In short, girls are a bit more difficult because they have emotions they either express freely or keep so bottled up inside they become...well, like Emma. Men have those emotions and they usually deal with them in their own way, especially when they have a father to help them understand. All you need to know is that you aren't a bad mother for how Emma turned out, and that how Emma turned out is not bad either. She's who she is and all you have to do is love her for it and express it to her because we know she doesn't think she's capable of receiving feelings like that."

"But how can I express it to her when she does things like this? She was so reserved before and now, after...after the assault, she's become so difficult to talk to. How can I tell her I love her when she's not listening to me?"

Cadence laughed. "Like I said, she's difficult. She's like your husband in so many ways, especially with that thick head of hers. How do you get through to Edgar? Or even Sabin? Those two are some of the most stubborn people on the planet! Just do what you do with them."

Terra giggled and then took the young woman into a tight hug. "You are too sweet Cadence. Thank you."

"Oh, that reminds me..." she gently tugged away. "It is actually about your daughter."

"What did she do?"

"Well...it is actually, 'what has been done' to her."

"What happened to her?" Terra demanded, already hysterical.

"Sssh, sssh," Cadence clamped a hand over the queen's mouth and looked toward the residential area. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you, she's perfectly okay. She's in her room right now. However, I suspect soon enough she's going to have a lot of things to talk about with you."

Terra removed the barrier over her mouth. "I don't understand, did someone hurt her?"

"Not necessarily, no, but just be ready to talk to her whenever she might need you to, okay?" because I don't know when...but I know I'll need to step between Alexander and Emma. He will push too hard and confuse the poor girl. Gods...why do I have to be the one to do this?

"Alright," Terra said, calming down, relieved. "You startled me, Cadence. I thought..." she shook her head. "Never mind that now." she smiled. "Are you heading out with your father now?"

"Yes. I just said goodbye to your daughter."

"I imagine she was quite upset. She very much adores you, Cadence." Terra looked very sad by that idea, simply because she thought she was being replaced, or perhaps she believed her daughter would grow even worse without her around.

How terribly so did she wish to giggle and tell Terra about her daughter's ever growing crush into the blossoming love for Alexander, but she knew better, and suspected at least a part of Terra already knew. Emma needed to work through it herself before having her mother pester her about it anyway, and potentially try to break it to pieces because she disagreed about it being towards Alexander (even if Cadence both agreed and disagreed with that). And hopefully by then either Emma disengaged herself from that feeling or Alexander had, or maybe Emma told him how she felt and they discussed it and moved away from it. Something, anything, to help her not have to sit Emma down and explain the situation to her. Anything at all.

Either way, for the moment, the girl was in good hands. Her mood was the best it could be in and if things went according to plan, Emma's growth would be something to look forward to. Cadence smiled. "She will be fine."

••••••••••••

Alexander woke that morning thinking of Emma. It was the strangest thing for him to wake or sleep thinking of a girl and not have it be sexual, and yet it was happening. He had opened his eyes and immediately wondered if she was up yet, and then if she was readying for the day humming like she usually did, or perhaps if she accidentally overslept because she was tired due to nightmares.

And then he was a little annoyed by it, for reasons he couldn't quite fathom, and hurried about the day himself. He had a lot of daily chores to finish at the residence, to help his mother, before he could even move forward to those he had to do at the aerodome before he could hope to go see her. He unintentionally found himself hurrying his tasks up around the residence, earning strange looks from his lounging brothers and a resting mother, who had hurt her leg six days prior.

"Alexander, honey," his mother had said, watching from her sofa by the windows, tea in hand. "That's enough. Why don't you take a moment to yourself?"

He looked up from hauling the equipment from the basement to stare at his mother, frowning. "What, why?"

Angelo snickered from his spot, but it was Loreto that said, "Alexander, look what you have been taking out of the basement." and when he glanced to see what, he pinked. There were dozens of boxes out of the basement, when he only needed four, and most of them were of things they had taken with them from Maranda or were from their childhood, or otherwise 'trash'. Was he that distracted? And by a girl of all things?

"I'm sorry, I didn't get a lot of sleep last night," he lied quickly, ashamed for that and for acting like some fool.

His annoying brothers seemed to know what the cause was though and Angelo smirked. "Oh, it doesn't have anything to do with running late to your meeting with the princess?"

Loreto elbowed him hard, but the smirk he wore indicated he enjoyed the tease as much as Angelo did. Alexander tore something out of the box and threw it at him. "Knock it off, you little bastard."

"Boys, enough," their mother said sternly from her spot. "Leave your brother alone. He is worried for Emma. You should have enough decency to worry for her as well." they pinked. "Alexander, I understand you are running late to see her, so you can leave the chores here for your brothers. Skip along to the aerodome and do what you can, however, do not put off seeing the princess for too long. Heavens, I wouldn't want the poor girl to wait along for you when you have finally cleared your schedule enough to see her again."

His brothers gaped stupidly at their mother. "What, mother, this isn't fair!"

"Life is not fair," she simply said through a smile as she sipped at her tea.

"Why can't he take care of the chores and we go see the princess?" Loreto asked. "If Cadence hadn't left, she'd agree with us! We're better company for the princess than Alexander!"

"Nice try, squirt," Alexander said, walking over to squeeze his little brother's neck. His brother squirmed. "Don't let me find out your passed over your chores either, or I'll tell on you to father." he briskly left them to that threat, grinning over the fact that they were too stunned by their mother's careful teasing payback to respond to their brother's threat.

The walk from the Gabbiani residence to the aerodome was a relatively short walk. When they took up a living quarters in Figaro, they had purposely pursued a place nearby. With some intervention from the king, and a large sum of gil and pleading on Setzer's part to a merchant looking to buy the same place, they had managed to secure the place.

At the time Alexander had loathed living in Figaro, with the only benefit being that he got to see Cadence more than he did living in Maranda and her practically living in Figaro to see her 'beloved' prince. Even then he had found anger in his heart for it whenever he saw her with the prince. He didn't know why. It would just irritate him and prickle his anger. Now though, he thought more and more of seeing Emma than personally cutting in between the eldest prince and Cadence. He was thankful though that the prince didn't have the chance to stick his nose into his relationship with his sister or Cadence, though he supposed with the prince being missing that helped the issue.

I'm such an ass, he thought drearily as he worked through the aerodome's list of unfinished duties. He's gone, possibly dead or captured but here I am glad he's not standing between me, his sister and Cadence. He accidentally dropped his torx wrench then and it broke through the new piping he installed into the ship. With a swear, he knelt to retrieve it and stop the leaking. When he cleaned up the leakage and repaired the pipes, he knew he needed to clear his mind or he would never get anything done.

She's on my mind way too much, he realized as he dug his way out of the half completed shell of the airship his father and crewmen had begun working on several weeks ago. Not only was it beginning to effect his life at home and his living conditions, but now it was effecting his work. He sighed and ran a hand over his face, annoyed, because the one thing he still wanted to do then was skip work to go see her.

With a short laugh, he rubbed tiredly at his neck. "Well..." he smirked. "No avoiding it, I guess." he put his tools away and asked one of the foremen to cover for his shifts—it took bribing him with some gil and some of his mother's homemade pastries, which the crew very much adored—and then he was off.

The halls in the castle were as they were any other day post war announcement. With the exception of the princess' wing, soldiers packed every hall, running tasks and drills or doing patrol, while others prepared fresh recruits or moved supplies or prepared for their departure to foreign land. With each and every day Alexander recognized fewer and fewer faces as more and more men joined the military or were called in from the lords and cities and villages. The few he could recognized were so busy that they could do no more than nod or smile in his direction, no longer able to stop and update him preemptively on the princess' current mood or the situation.

Today seemed a little different though. As he was headed into the wing where the princess lived, he nearly collided right into Wren, who was leading three soldiers. They were dressed in the recruit colors of the military ground forces, the pale blue and black. They looked not much older than his little brothers. It was astonishing to realize how youngsters were not spared from war.

"Captain," Alexander said, offering a slight smile. It had been some time. The last time he had seen the captain was three weeks ago. In the time between, the captain had sent Jakle about in his place. "I see you've been busy."

"And I grow busier by the second," he grumbled tiredly. "These boys are more green than the last six put together," that made the boys pink. "however, they've got fierce hearts and a talent in them. The man-at-arms will train them into great soldiers, I know it."

Alexander laughed. He remembered when he took up a sword at Maranda. Celes had beaten the living hell out of him all the while Cadence giggled from the stands. If the Figaro man-at-arms were as fierce and dedicated as Celes was as an instructor, the recruits were in for a lot of bruises.

"Somehow though, I don't think you are here to see me," Wren said through a small knowing smile.

"That I'm not," he agreed with a laugh. "Do you know how she is today, Wren?"

"I haven't the foggiest. I do not see the girl anymore," he looked sad to admit that. "However, I have heard that Lady Cadence is leaving for a short while with her father on some errands. It might have some effect on the girl."

Alexander had vaguely recalled hearing about Cadence father's need to reach Narshe, but he didn't know she would be going with them. That would surely upset Emma. She was lonely enough as was. "I see," he finally managed to say and then sighed. "Wren, you know...she just might like seeing you."

The captain smiled. "No, I don't think she would, not right now...besides," he gestured to the patient lads behind him. "I've got my hands tied now with my duties. When you see her though, if you could, please tell her I said hello." he departed then with the recruits quickly, leaving Alexander alone and with time to consider an approach towards the information as he walked.

By the time that he made it to her corridor on the second floor, he had a plan on how to address the issue if she were truly upset by Cadence's sudden departure from Figaro. He took a moment to collect his thoughts and comb his hair with his fingers before he knocked on her door. For a moment it seemed like there was no activity on the other side of the door, but then he heard gentle foot steps and a quieted, tired voice call out a 'Who is it?'.

"Alexander the Great," he answered with a small smile. There was a giggle and more shuffling noises, and then the door opened. He took in the sight of her immediately and was unaware of how much it pleased him to do so and see that she was looking healthier every day. She had nearly recovered from her need to rely on her crutches, though sometimes she used one when she was feeling weak or accidentally pulled something or woke up sore.

The only thing about her right now that he noticed was that she looked very tired, and her hair looked a little disheveled, as if she had been napping. He felt guilty then, because he knew she had trouble sleeping enough as it was. His eyes carried down then and saw that she was dressed in a baggy night gown, with long, thin socks, one of which was rumpled down to her ankle, revealing her leg.

He looked away quickly and took a deep breath. Now he was certain she wouldn't get out of his mind. Why did she have to be so damn cute?

"I'm sorry if I interrupted anything," he said apologetically, still looking away, because if he looked at her right now he'd want to keep looking and if he kept looking, he'd want to start to do more than that. "I finished my work early today, so..."

She smiled and rubbed at her eyes. He was right. She had been asleep. He chided himself. Hell. I should have stayed at work until my normal time... "Good morning, Alexander," she said first. Another thing he felt foolish for. He didn't greet her properly. He pinked a little. Damn, damn, damn! "W-Would you like to c-come in?" she asked as she opened the door, and though he knew he should have turned away because of how she was dressed, he nodded and walked in. It was selfish of him, but he couldn't turn away. He wanted to see more of her. The urge could not be denied.

She closed the door and walked by her dresser's looking glass. When she saw her hair, she pinked and went to fix her hair, unaware he was looking. He smirked and looked away, knowing she thought she was being sneaky about her personal care, and said, "I ran into captain Wren on the way over."

That made her turn to look at him. "You did?"

"He asked me to tell you that he says hello and wishes you a good morning. He misses you terribly." she looked away and he knew she felt guilty over something. "but he wanted you to know he understood how you feel and he wants you to feel safe and happy over anything else." Alexander had added that, but looking at her expression, he could not let her feel that emotion any longer and he was certain that if Wren knew his good wishes had caused her pain, he wouldn't have minded the lie on his part whatsoever.

She looked unsure and started to twist her fingers together. "He's...he's not m-mad at me?"

That took Alexander aback. "Why would he be mad at you Emma?"

"I was mean to him before and...and..." she sighed. "It d-doesn't matter now." and then something must have clicked in her head, because she began to stammer. "Uh...I'll...I'll have t-to get ready and..."

"What's wrong with the way you're dressed now? I quite like it."

That worked out exactly as he planed. Her face went beet red and her eyes widened, and then she caved and said, "I...I'd like to get ready if—if you do not mind."

"Of course not," he said. "I assume you haven't eaten yet?" she gave him a look and he knew. "Then I shall return with something for you." he gave her a small bow and then briskly took his leave. As soon as he was outside, the door closed almost sharply behind him. He held back a chuckle. He really did adore the princess when she was like this.

With the princess readying herself for the day, and he hoped mostly for him, he went out to get her something to eat. He wished to spoil her and, in turn, earn him some points. If Cadence leaving truly was hurting her, she would need some comfort anyhow, and he suspected a few foods she wasn't allowed to have to break her fast would prove serviceable to that.

The great hall was vacant when he arrived. There wasn't even a maid moping the floors or cleaning the tables. He supposed with the decreased activity of the royal family and the soldiers out and about the fields and court yards, there wasn't really a need for anyone to be using the hall, but it felt strange nonetheless.

He walked down the space between the tables towards the kitchen and peaked inside. Not even a chef. He sighed. That was probably for the best. He shouldn't bother them with his silly requests. Besides, if he wished to impress the princess, he should probably do the cooking and food prepping by himself.

He tore through the cabinets for a good few minutes before he located the ingredients he was looking for. It was organized in a way very much unlike how his mother organized her own kitchen. He decided to make her something special, something new, something to make a memory out of. He prayed, as he put the things together, that she would not find it disgusting.

It was a traditional dish from Narshe, one he had tried as a kid and loved. His mother had made it for him every solstice since, and since he loved it so much, he had learned to make it himself. The good thing was that it could be a breakfast or a supper meal, depending on the ingredients used. It took him a little over half an hour to prepare and cook, but once it was done he was on his way. It didn't taste nearly as good when it was warm or cold.

Thankfully Emma was done readying herself for the day by then. When he pushed the door open, forgetting to knock, she was at her dresser looking for her hair brush. Her hair was damp and clung to her face. She looked up immediately at the scent of the food and he could tell instantly that she was very hungry.

Did she eat last night? He had a feeling she might not have. She probably skipped it...but why?

She forgot what she was doing to look at his tray. "That...that s-smells good," she watched as he sat the tray down on the table by her bed. "W-what is it?"

He smiled, amused by her lovely curiosity. "A traditional dish from Narshe," he gestured her over and lifted the top off the bowl. It was some strange looking meaty soup. If she was going to complain about the soup—and he knew her enough to know that she would—she stopped the second she saw the chunks of meat. Her lips pulled up into a beautiful smile. "They call it 'piruzoskia', and I think it means something like 'hearty soup'."

Emma looked at him and he felt like jelly looking into her eyes. "Are...are you going to eat with me?"

He tried to remain calm and collected. Don't react like some fool. You aren't a little boy anymore. Don't act like it. "I'd love to, if you'd really have me," he said.

Without a table to eat at, they set the food up on the floor under the window, after drawing the curtains and window fully open to let in the light and fresh air. Alexander thought it was incredibly cute how she took extra time and care to set out a blanket and smooth it out so that they did not sit on the cold floor. Whenever they moved and a wrinkle appeared, she would go stir crazy and smooth it out, sometimes without even knowing she was doing it. He wanted to reach out and take her hands every time she did it and kiss each little finger.

What they talked about ranged over so many topics at times it was hard to keep track. The more this strange girl spoke, the more he didn't know but wished to. She was the most mysterious thing he had ever met before, so reserved and yet as powerful as a summer storm. There were few things he could bring up that she didn't have something to say on the matter, but there were certainly things she brought up that he hadn't the tiniest fraction of knowledge of. She knew some grasp of the study of languages, geography, anthropology, zoology, and so many other things he didn't even know the terms for but certainly did now. She was like a giant book of everything and once she was excited into a discussion, there was really no getting her to stop until she ran out of stamina, or was distracted by something else.

However, if it was up to Alexander, he would gladly sit and listen to her until something or someone had to force him to leave. There wasn't a part of her voice that he didn't enjoy. The stammering, the repeating, the soft spoken nature, the warmth and that Thamasan accent she tried so hard to hide...he couldn't imagine not hearing her again.

I wonder what she will sound like when she is older, he suddenly thought as he watched her lips. In the foreground, he was vaguely aware of what she was saying. Something about the stone structures of Thamasa or whatnot. Gods, I hope she doesn't change. Please, let her be like this forever. She is perfect the way that she is. Suddenly those pretty little lips stopped moving and he frowned. Hmm?

"Alexander?"

He looked up. "Yes?"

Her brows furrowed a little and she moved her head to the side. "...am I t-talking too much?"

He wanted to laugh. Not nearly as much as I'd hope you would. "Of course not," he said. "Why do you ask such a thing?"

She looked away. "I...I'm not u-used to t-talking like this," she admitted softly.

"I understand," he reached over to take her hand. "However, I want you to try and feel comfortable with it now, because you have me and Cadence at the very least, if you doubt everything else. We will always be here for you to talk to." That blush is amazing on you, he thought as her cheeks warmed further and she took her hand away, shy yet again.

"What...what if I want to talk about you?"

That drew him out of his thoughts sharply. "Me? Why would you want to talk about me?"

"I j-just want to know—know more about you," she stammered. "If...if that's okay."

Alexander never considered she would be interested in learning more about him, but he should have guessed, given her clear infatuation. And now that he thought about it, she always did try to ask him questions, but he deflected them, somehow. When he thought about it, he wasn't sure why he did it. He suddenly felt uncomfortable about it, but ashamed for treating her that way.

She must have felt frustrated and embarrassed whenever I pushed her questions aside, he thought, staring into her eyes. She looked away quickly. What a fool I've been. He chuckled. "Alright princess. Let's talk about me some. I'd make it another game but I'm afraid we're out of fruit."

Emma giggled. "I'll h-h-have fruit n-next time."

He laughed. "I'll keep you to that promise, princess. Now," he leaned forward and gave her a charming, wide smile. "What do you want to know first?"

Emma's eyes widened. "I...I don't know," she mumbled, hesitant.

I suppose it would be a bit awkward to just start asking someone questions like that, especially someone in her position, he thought as he leaned back to support himself on his hands. "Alright then, I'll start off for you, is that alright?" she nodded slowly. "My name is Alexander Orazio Gabbiani. I was born on a hot summer night, or so my mother likes to complain every time I get on her nerves, on Mitros seventeenth seven forty one AM."

"Mitros is the month of rebirth," she said. "T-that's a very lucky m-month in the Veldt."

"That must be why my mother tried to sell me there then."

Emma giggled. "She wouldn't sell you, she'd m-miss you too much."

"Aye, she'd miss the target to throw things at." he added, which only made her laugh further. Gods, how he wanted to hear that laugh always. "You'd miss me right? I mean, if my mother sold me off to some Veldtic merchants?"

Emma was completely honest when she replied. "I miss you when you leave me every day."

He was stunned to hear that. He tried to act like it didn't impact him the way that it did and said, laughing, "Well, at least I know that if a pirate ever holds me hostage for ransom the princess of Figaro will pay for my freedom."

She giggled. "I don't think my father would be too h-happy about that. He doesn't like d-dealing with pirates."

You silly girl, he would do anything for you, he wanted to say. That is why you were permitted to go to that ball. "Oh, that reminds me...best adventure I had was traveling to the Veldt."

Her eyes went wide. "You traveled to the Veldt? For true?"

"I did," he said, smiling. "I even met some of the princes...though not in any way my mother would be proud to repeat to another."

"You did?" she was truly excited now. "Oh! How? What—what happened?"

"I went to the royal palace with a friend of mine to steal a few of their treasured flowers...well...for reasons. We ended up being seen by the sentry and were chased down and caught. I was brought before one of the older princes. I think it was the fifth prince and he was not too pleased. They adore their gardens, you see, and wanted to have us serve two months in the kitchens at the very least shackled for the crime, but two other sons intervened and got us out, calling us foolhardy and such. We barely got out of it with the skin on our backs...well, until my mother found out when we returned to our rooms in the city's nearest inn. Then she skinned us."

Emma giggled. "How o-old were you?"

He thought on it. "I was actually about your age I think, maybe a year younger. So not very long ago. We wanted to do something stupid and thought stealing royal treasures would suffice. I suppose you can guess that I was punished thoroughly afterward."

"It sounds so fun," she breathed, happily. "D-Did you always do things like that when you were younger?"

"Crazy things?" he laughed. "All of the time, though Cadence tried her hardest to keep me in line when my mother couldn't. She was tough on me whenever I stepped out of line...actually, she'd whack me and your brothers pretty hard if we screwed up. She wouldn't take anything from anyone."

Emma said, "Oh, Cadence wouldn't hit my brother."

"Oh, but she did," he smirked. "She'd smack him right up beside the head whenever he'd do or say something stupid or dangerous. Sometimes she'd even use a tool if she had too. Other times she'd just shoot us this wicked glare she got from her mother...works every time."

The laughter that he was blessed with then lifted his spirits. "You w-w-were all v-very naughty children then."

"Most definitely," he agreed. "Sometimes my mother would threaten me and my brothers with refusals to get us anything for the winter solstice for our actions, and sometimes what we did would really earn us those empty celebration mornings. I haven't gotten anything in many years though, because I've become an adult and I haven't had any use for it, so those punishments have readied me for it. I'm thankful for it."

That revelation made her become very still. "You...you haven't gotten anything for the solstice in years?"

"Aye, but that's alright. I've grown out of it, and I've got no use for it anyhow."

Emma looked away, clearly thinking on something, and then she looked at him. "Do you not accept gifts?"

"Well...it isn't that I don't accept them," he said with a small chuckle. "It is that when asked I don't say anything. It is because I don't need or want anything. It is part of growing up, I guess. You become detached from it, I suppose, though I did hate that it hurt my mother a little bit. She was really disappointed. Mothers particularly love the event for the children's sake, but eventually she understood."

Emma fiddled with her fingers for a moment and then asked, "Would...would you say...that..."

He smiled. She wants to ask for something but won't because she thinks she can't, is that it? "What is it, Emma?"

"Would you accept a...a gift from me?" she finally asked, still looking down at her fingers, too shy to look up and see what he might look like. If she had, she would have seen his surprise, and genuine happiness.

Oh, he thought. She wants to get me something? That is...unexpected. "I would gladly accept a gift from you Emma." and then he saw the most perfect opportunity. "However, I would have to ask you to tell me what you want. I can't have the princess of Figaro giving me gifts and not getting anything in return. So, if you tell me what you want and let me get you something, I'll tell you what I want so you can get me something."

"W-why would you want to get me anything?" she croaked, trembling a little. He wished with all his might she didn't have such doubt in her own worth. Gods girl, you don't realize how much your parents love you or how dearly Cadence adores you...how much I would hate to be separated from your side.

"Why?" he repeated softly. "Because I like you Emma, and I'd like to gift you something. Why would you want to gift me something?" that made her blush and advert her eyes. "Is it a deal?" he held out a hand and offered her a goofy smile. Slowly, she reached out to take his offer and he felt on fire. Her hand was so warm in his. She's too perfect, too damn perfect. "Deal set! Now, you tell me first what your beautiful heart desires and I shall throw my whole being into producing it."

She let his hand go and leaned away, embarrassed by his words. "I'm...I'm not sure, really...I have everything I ever—ever wanted."

"I'm sure not everything," he said.

"Well," she mumbled. "I...I don't have any of Ladio's literature, and his dissertations on arithmetic are—are very interesting, but so are his novellas...but...but I wouldn't mind w-whatever you got me." and he knew she wouldn't. She didn't seem the person to care. He could get her a box of tissues and she'd cherish it, she was that kind of person.

He smiled. Ladio, hm? "Emma," he said, catching her attention. "You never cease to amaze me. A girl—and a girl of your age no less—having interest in Ladio, of all people." he started to laugh. "You are strange, indeed..."

"It is weird, I know," she mumbled and looked every bit as she normally did when she beat herself down.

"Even if it was weird, so what? Emma, it being different or strange, that's what makes you you and I wouldn't want to know you any other way. I like you this way." he wanted to reach out and take her into his arms and kiss her all over. Hold yourself back, you scoundrel, he told himself. "Please, don't ever change."

She smiled and then asked, "What about you? What...what do you want?"

"Your tender love and care," he teased, getting her stuttering 'Alexander!'. He loved that. "Alright alright...honestly?" he thought for a moment, considering it as he watched her eyes. She was waiting patiently, eyes sparkling. She really wanted to get him something, and it showed. She was excited. I don't have anything to ask for that she could get, not without her asking for help from her family... he knew better than to ask for something a bit more intimate, like alone time, because he knew she'd grant it and he wouldn't be able to control himself around her. It would mean something forward that she wouldn't understand but he would certainly move on.

I don't want to put her in that situation either, he thought, and I know I wouldn't be able to look at her for too long and control myself. He knew he had to think of something for her though, not just had to, but wanted to. And yet, he couldn't let his fears control him. He needed Emma to move away from her fears, to step out of her shadows and doubts, to get out of her room.

I just have to control myself, he thought. She deserves to know the life that awaits her out there, the goodness that it can give her.

"I have something...but you have to promise you'll deliver it."

She blinked. "Okay. I promise."

Oh sweet princess...do you? "If you promise," he said, smiling. "When you are well enough to leave your room, I want my gift to be your presence on a date, to celebrate the end of the year."

Her face went completely red. "W-w-w-what?"

"You promised," he reminded her, pushing it with a charming smile. "It is a small thing, and we could go anywhere your little heart desires. I just want to see you step out of this damnable castle. If I have to take it as a gift, I shall. We could take one of my father's airships up north to the beaches and shoot off some fireworks at nightfall or go someplace else, if you'd rather. We don't have to be around people. It could be just us, or if you want to be around others, we could be."

She was becoming very pale now and it was starting to worry him a bit. "A...a d-d-date? You...you want a date for...for...your..." she couldn't even continue from her shock of it, or the embarrassment.

"Yes," he confirmed. "It can be whenever you are feeling better though, it doesn't actually have to be at the end of the year. We'll just pretend it was actually on the end of the year."

"What...what if I don't ever f-feel better about it?"

He smirked. "I know you will eventually, whenever it is, but if you don't...I'll take the date in the garden. Is that a good compromise?"

When she nodded at him, he saw tears in her eyes, but they were tears of appreciation he knew for considering her feelings and trying to help her the best way he could around them. She was glad he could understand. "Yes...that's a g-good compromise."

There was a sudden knock on her door that made her jump up with absolute fright. He reached out to catch her and steady her. "It is alright, it is only someone at the door." she was trembling in his arms. It made him realize just how uneasy his gift request made her, but he hoped that was only because she was unused to the idea of it rather than just dreading it. "I'll see who it is."

Alexander left her at her spot and glanced back only when he reached the door. She was trying to distract herself with the remaining cookies he had brought with him up with the food. He smiled and turned to open the door. It was a soldier, some fresh recruit, barely older than Emma. He looked ready to burst into tears and run back to his mother.

"What is it?" Alexander demanded under his breath.

"T-The queen sent me to tell you to bring her daughter to the foyer," he stammered. "She says something important has happened and she r-requires her daughter."

Alexander sent the soldier off and then turned back into the room. "Emma, it seems your mother requires you in the foyer."

She looked up at him with a frown. "What? W-why? C-Couldn't she come to m-my room?"

Alexander shrugged. "She must be too busy or something. Either way, I'm sure she's already sent word to clear the halls for your walk over. Do you want me to accompany you?"

Emma gasped. "Yes, please!" she tried to get up a bit too quickly but tumbled forward. He raced forward to grab onto her arm and hold her up. "I don't w-want to go by m-myself."

"Alright then, I will go, just be a bit more careful, hm? I couldn't bare anything happening to the most beautiful of princesses."

••••••••••••

They had left her room and all she could think about was what he requested for his gift. It made her heart thrum wildly in her chest. She knew his intentions were just noble, to get her out of her room and to get her to step out of the shadow of her pain, but even so it meant so much to her. Cadence had told her to try and tell Alexander how she felt, but Emma still didn't even know what that was or how to even say it. For now she was completely content with being beside him as much as she could. If he was willing to part with her some of his time, that was the greatest thing she could ever receive as a gift.

He said it was a date though, she thought as they walked side by side down the hall. She kept a good distance beside him, just in case she tripped or needed support. He insisted on that, no matter how hard she fought. Would he still say that if he just wanted to help me?

Focus, her voice hissed. What could mother want?

Oh, who cares, she thought, too preoccupied with Alexander, and excited and very nervous. If she's mad there's nothing we...I can do anyway. If something bad happened, I can't do anything. If...if it is about Benjamin, he'll be so angry with us no matter what.

Her voice snarled. If we are to be in trouble, I would rather you were ready to face it!

"Are you alright?" Alexander asked quietly as they approached the foyer's double doors. Just a few more feet now. Emma swallowed back a hoarse reply and nodded. "Fear naught Emma. I'm sure whatever it is, it is good. Your mother wouldn't have sent for you to deliver you bad news. That wouldn't be right. She just wouldn't."

Emma saw the sense in that and took a deep breath as Alexander pushed the doors open and they entered the foyer. Emma saw her mother standing by the tables immediately, and to her relief, it was only her mother. Her brother was not in sight.

Alexander announced their arrival with a cough. Terra turned with a small smile, and then gestured them further in. The doors closed behind them with a small rapt and in they went. "Emma, I'm glad you actually decided to come," she said, her smile growing. "I have a gift for you, but well...it isn't from me. It is from your father."

That made Emma freeze stiff beside Alex. "From father?" she hadn't asked him for anything, how? Why? When?

Terra reached towards the table and recovered two envelopes and then held them out to her. "They arrived for you this morning. I almost opened them, but thankfully I opened and read the one addressed to me first to know these are for you. They're private." Emma accepted them with trembling hands, unsure of what to say or do. The elegant writing on the front of the envelopes certainly looked like her father's, but why? "I thought you would want to know rather than have them be delivered to you as if they're regular mail."

"but..." she looked up. "I...I didn't ask for anything from him."

Terra's smile slightly dropped. "I know sweetling, but why don't you read them anyway? A letter is a precious thing, after all. If you feel that strongly afterward, well, you can always set them aside, couldn't you?"

Emma quietly pressed the letters to her chest. "Okay..."

"Oh, and this arrived from Narshe for you." she held out another letter. "I assume you know who it is from."

Emma excitedly took it. "Cadence!" she squealed happily, almost falling forward had it not been for her mother, who simply laughed rather than cry out from worry.

Alexander explained with, "She's very excitable today, Terra, and it appears that I have to go now. Duty, as they say, is always around the corner. Would you be so kind as to walk her back to her room for me?"

"Oh, do you have to?" Emma mumbled. "Couldn't y-y-you s-stay?"

"I would if I could, my sweet princess, but I have work at the aerodome to resume and plenty more to finish back at home for my mother, but I will see you again tomorrow, I promise." he did a quick bow. "Besides, I know I'm only tolerable in small doses. I'd hate to become insufferable company to you when I delight too much in yours."

Emma drew herself back a step and mumbled something under her breath, which only made him smirk proudly. Terra giggled. "Oh Alexander, you're a charming fool, aren't you? Always on the prowl."

He laughed. "Ouch! Now I see where your daughter gets it from." he looked at Emma and then took her hand. He grazed her knuckles with a kiss, which immediately made her tug her hand away and hide it away with a fierce blush on her cheeks. Her mother was smiling at the scene. "I shall see you again tomorrow, my dear princess." and then he bowed and was on his way.

She drove him away! The voice howled angrily, referring to their—her—mother.

Quiet! Emma demanded.

"Come along then Emma, and I'll walk you to your room, if that's what you would like?" her mother held out her arm and for a moment Emma considered declining so she could chase after Alexander and ask if she could accompany him on his tasks, but then she paused. Whatever work he had to do, it was around others, and he would most likely decline. It was clear he didn't want to be around her anymore. She had annoyed him somehow. So she reached out to take her mother's arm, defeated, and let her mother lead her away.

When they were tucked safely away in her room, Terra left Emma at her bed while she not so discreetly tidied up the room and such. She wanted to know what the letters were about, and not even Emma could be oblivious to that. Emma was not one to think it was something to hide, or felt the need to, so she opened one of them. It was the heavier one, but it turned out not to be a letter at all, but a large, folded world map. It was clearly custom made, and hand painted. It was designed in such a way that it very clearly looked like a pirate's treasure map.

Emma didn't notice that her mother wasn't cleaning but staring with a smile on her face. Emma sat aside the map and opened the other letter. Her father's writing was like printing. Perfect in every single way.

Dearest Emma,

I meant to write to you earlier, but I admit the words could not reach me. I struggled not only on what to say, but on if I should. We didn't exactly part on the best of terms, and that I take the fault of entirely. There were so many things I wished to say to you that day but I couldn't find the courage to say. To be perfectly honest with you, there are still things I cannot find the courage to say. It is pitiful, I know, and you deserve so much more from your father. I feel ashamed that all I can muster up for you are letters, and that when I was near you I was too much a coward to face you. I want to change that, but now I am across the ocean, and I couldn't be further from you.

When I return, I will change that, and I shall hope against hope that you will permit me that chance. For now, I also hope that you understand my concentration lies now with your brother. I'm not sure if your mother has told you about your brother yet, she may not have and if she hasn't I suspect now I will get quite a heated letter from her, but he is missing. He went missing in a skirmish off the beaches not soon after we landed. We were victorious, and it was thanks to your brother. He lead the counter assault, and I felt it best to tell you about it. When it began, we were frenzied. I could not rally the men, not even with the efforts of Suon my dear. The men were being slaughtered by Roskovian from the high grounds in the tree lines. I could not get them to reform ranks. They wanted to retreat to the ships and depart.

Your brother, however, managed to calm them. And I shall tell you how, because it filled me with pride, and for two reasons. It worked. And not only did it work, my dearest daughter, but Cambyses drew me aside after the bloody skirmish and he told me, laughing and shaking from exhaustion, that he had learned of this tactic from you. He told me, 'I remembered it from Emma's prattling about the Battle at Ensleig'. He had the archers hold the line at the beach and the infantry hold a shield wall in front. Suon held the ground with them. He then led our cavalry on a flank. I escorted the other flank. We routed them through the woods, and soon enough the battle was over. A great number of them had perished, a great shame that, it is never a good thing when life must end, but most fled with their tails between their legs. We regrouped momentarily and then set off.

How much did your mother tell you and your brother? I'd imagine not much, she is a frail woman for these details, it pains her. You must not fault her for it. She loves her children and I'd imagine she thinks it would hurt you two more to know the details than to not know them, but I think you are strong Emma. I think you deserve to know. Your brother was lost shortly after. We were pushing forward south-east, meaning to keep out of sight, when we were ambushed yet again. I suspect, now, that this was their plan all along. The land they assaulted us on...it was perfect for them. I think they drew us in there. We were separated quickly, but we didn't lose many men at all. We fled south, but I lost track of your brother there, and a squadron of men that was accompanying him.

I want you to know I am, even to this moment as I write this, doing everything in my power to locate him. I will not stop until I have found him. There is nothing in this world that means more to me than my family. And, my dearest daughter, that includes you. That brings me to your gift. I wish I could have sent you something more, but I had little with me, and your mother informed me you are reluctant to share anything you may desire. So I made a guess. I had it designed in camp, and based it off the maps I saw and used when I was in company with my old crew. I hope you still like pirates and pirate adventures...if not, well, tell your mother whatever it is you desire. You may have it and more.

Please rest well. I shall see you soon, and I will have your brother with me when I return. I love you, my dear, with all my heart.

Your father,

Emma stared at the letter for a moment longer and then glanced up at her mother. There were tears in her eyes. Why didn't her mother tell her any of this? And did Benjamin know?

Her mother's expression softened into worry. "Is something wrong Emma?"

"No," she mumbled, rubbing at her eyes. It didn't matter now. Knowing the details about how he vanished didn't change anything anyhow. Bringing it up now would just upset her mother, and bring a wedge between them. It was obvious that her mother felt it wasn't something she couldn't tell her and Benjamin, that it was too much too soon.

"Well," she said, nervously. "What did your father send you?" Emma hesitantly held out the map and Terra took it. She smiled after a moment, tears in her eyes, and then asked, "What do you think about it?"

"I don't know," she answered honestly.

Burn it, her voice growled.

"Oh," her mother sighed. "You probably outgrew pirates...haven't you?" she handed the map back, and Emma knew her mother was very disappointed, or perhaps extremely sad. "You know Emma...the only reason I pushed you so hard in knowing what you wanted was because...well...you aren't going to be my little girl forever. Your brothers grew up and now they are barely around, well they weren't even before the war. They had lives, women to court, interests to chase." she reached up to wipe a few tears away. "I miss the simple days, when you three were young, that's all."

Emma felt immense guilt. I let Alexander get...try to get me something...now even father has gotten me something.

You didn't ask for him to get you anything, her voice reminded her.

Emma found her strength to tell her mother she changed her mind, that she would ask for something, but someone knocked on her door. Terra went to the door immediately. Emma could smell who it was. Her uncle. It had been some time since she had seen him. She leaned forward so she could see him. She could hear their discussion.

"...Hals ensures me that the 3rd Brigade will be ready to send out to Roskovo by the end of the fortnight," her uncle whispered. "but the problem is supplying their ships long enough across the sea until they reach their destination. There aren't any islands to stop by along the way."

Her mother said, "Send them off with as much as their ships can carry then."

"That will seriously slow them down. I can do it, but you must be aware of it, and we will have to send word ahead to Edgar."

Emma immediately drew herself deeper into the conversation upon hearing her father's name. Perhaps, if they weren't paying attention enough, they would let slip something they wouldn't mean to...

"See to it then," her mother whispered. "However, no soldier not adept enough will be sent, am I clear? I will not bear the responsibilities or shame of sending unready boys to their death."

Sabin reached out to touch her shoulder. "I understand Terra. Consider it done."

All of those lives, she thought pitifully. Sacrificing themselves for me...and for what? Why couldn't they just ignore Roskovo? Why couldn't we just hold Figaro?

The only pitiful thing here is you, her voice growled.

Emma sighed, mostly out of annoyance of her voice, but it caught the attention of her mother and uncle. Before her mother could stop him, her uncle smiled and gently pried his way into her room with a big, goofy smile on his face.

"Why, if it isn't my niece!" he ruffled her hair, despite her mother gasping and saying 'Sabin, don't!' but Emma only pushed his hand away, annoyed. "I haven't seen you in a few weeks. I expected the next time that I did you'd actually be taller but look at you! Still my little mouse!"

"I've g-grown!" she snapped.

"Ha!" he laughed. "Oh, that reminds me..." he reached into his pocket and then held something out to her. "This is from Karin and I. We picked it up for you while we were in Maranda collecting on conscripts. And I know, I know, you're getting older now and you're not much into the solstice but...well, damn it, we saw it and thought it matched your eyes."

Emma looked into the sapphire rock with adoration and guilt. There were facets to it that shimmered purple under the light when you moved it any which way, like her eyes. Now her uncle was added to the list of gift givers. She felt her tears finally flow and her mother went to her side, soothing her.

"Did I do something wrong?" Sabin asked, worried.

Terra looked at him with a smile and shook her head. "Of course not. She's just tired, right Emma?" but Emma could not bring herself to answer. At least now she knew what she would do when Cadence returned. She would tell her to tell her mother to get her something—anything—if only to make her mother happy. Because being left out of something was a horrible thing in a family. "I'll set you up with some herbal tea and let you rest then, dear. Come Sabin, let my baby rest, come now, out out." she ushered the giant out of the room even as he kept glancing back, still unsure if he caused her any discomfort.

••••••••••••

If there was any gift that he could say deserved to be the most cherished in his heart, it would be the princess'. It didn't even matter if he hadn't yet received it, or if he never did. The fact that she had promised him or tried to promise him something so monumentally important and private had been enough for him.

Now all that he had to do was find the perfect gift for her. He knew she wanted something from Ladio. And since he had gone through her literature collection, he knew she absolutely did not possess any of his work. The problem though was that the man's work was exceptionally hard to find for sale.

And then it hit him.

He went back to his residence and dug through his things until he found his worn out copy of The Swan, Ladio's third novella, and one of his most niche works. And yet it was Alexander's favorite. It was a complex romance story, but just any romance story. It was a war story. It told the difficult love between a soldier of one nation and a lady of the other nation he was at war with, who met secretly at the border every night after one night when she found him dying in the woods.

Alexander hoped that it would please Emma and started to think on how to present it to her. Simply wrapping it won't do, he thought as he paced his room, irritated with himself. He wanted to do something more for her, to show her just how much she meant to him, and how he paid attention to her. Something so impersonal didn't feel right.

And then his eyes glanced over the book again and an idea slipped into his mind. A smile crept across his face. After a moment or two, the book had been completely wrapped in pages of various extra copies of books he had from his library. When he was done, he stuffed it away for later.

He knew that Emma did not feel like she could ask for anything for the celebration, that it was the real reason she had nothing to ask for, and knew the perfect way to surprise her. He would drop the gift on her lap the day of and flourish her with his most handsome of smiles and present to her a tease or two, to make her smile and giggle, because nothing was more beautiful to him than the sound of her laughter and the sight of her smile. And that would make the day enjoyable for her, surely, to make her forget her pains and troubles if only for a minute.

In three days time, the celebration would occur and he would be able to see that smiling face. All he had to do was have a little patience. For now Cadence was set to return after a short delay, and that would surely make Emma happy. She had missed the woman dearly, and it showed.

••••••••••••

Emma tossed and turned almost all night. When sleep finally carried her off, her sleep was fitful. Her dreams were ghoulish and of so many horrors. They skirted passed her days in the preparatory academy to the days she faced with her tormentors in the academy here in Figaro to Luke and her assault to this strange land of white where she was running and running aimlessly through a maze after her brother, but he kept vanishing around corners of black, twisted dead trees.

Try as she might, every time she tried to reach for him he would slip away and every time she tried to scream after him, her voice would not budge from her throat. Her brother would just keep walking and walking so much faster than her, as if he chased something, something more important than she could ever imagine.

She couldn't help but think he would get lost, over and over again, lost in the wilderness of a strange and hostile country, lost and never to come back, but no matter how hard she tried to will him to turn around and see her, he never did.

And then she was awake, breathing hard and trembling and drenched in sweat. Her ears were ringing and her feet felt as if she had been running along sharp rocks for hours, yet there she remained, in her bed beneath her sheets. She took a moment to collect her thoughts, knowing she had just experienced a nightmare, but instead she started to sob.

She couldn't even bring herself to care or fear the nightmares that brought up Luke or her tormentors. All she felt swell up in her heart was guilt and fear for her brother. Everything that had happened and would happen fell on her shoulders. If she hadn't have gone to that ball...no...if she hadn't have left Thamasa none of this would have happened. Her brother would still be in Figaro, with Cadence at his side, as the crowned prince being reared as the heir. There would be no war and there would be no need to sacrifice thousands of lives for her.

Let them choose what is worth their sacrifice, her voice said quietly, stirring into lucidity.

You don't understand anything, she thought painfully. That's how I know you aren't part of me. If you were you would care about them!

Emma felt something tingle at the back of her head. It was gentle at first, like a finger being pressed against the back of her head, and then it shifted into a thousand needles digging into her flesh. She squirmed with a quieted cry.

Her voice was furious. You foolish child, her voice growled. I am you! Soon you will see just how identical we are! It was like fire was burning her from the inside out. Then you will understand the depth of it all. The pain, the knowledge!

"Stop!" Emma begged. "Please, it hurts!"

Stop! Her voice mimicked coldly. Please, it hurts! The intensity of the burning grew until Emma could not take it anymore. "Stop!" she cried again, louder this time, through a broken sob. "Stop!" and a moment later as she trembled in her sheets, crying, her mother threw the door open and ran into the room.

"Emma, sweetling, what's wrong?" she charged to the window to draw the curtain open and it was then that Emma realized it was morning. The sunlight burned across the room. She squeezed her eyes shut against the tears and light and tried to hold back another sob as the pain started to ebb away. She felt her mother's hands on her forehead. "You were screaming. I could hear you from the end of the hall! Are you alright?"

No! She thought. I'm not! Her voice laughed. I will tell her about you! I'll tell her I've been hearing you!

Then be our guest, her voice said. Tell mother you have been hearing voices. Let us see where that takes us. An asylum in Narshe's mountains? A dungeon for reconditioning? Death as they served the insane all those years ago? Decide our fate. Let us face it.

Emma gritted her teeth. She knew the voice was right. Her mother would be worried. She would immediately seek attention for her ailments, however she could find it. Letting the idea go, she looked at her mother and let her tears fall.

"Oh, my sweetest child," Terra said, sitting on the bed to lift her daughter into a hug. She smoothed her hand down her daughter's hair and hummed a gentle song to her. "Everything will be alright," she whispered as she rocked her daughter. "No more tears my sweet angel, no more tears. I am here now." Terra patted her back for a moment longer and smoothed her hair and rocked her, and calmed her with words, and then after several minutes, when the cries softened, gently held her away to dry her cheeks. "There now, there...are you well, sweet child?"

Emma nodded and rubbed at her eyes.

For now, her voice said. Soon you will be sobbing again.

"That is good news," she said, raising to her feet. "I have prepared a wonderful assortment of foods to break your fast. Cadence and I were hoping you would join us for the morning, if you were feeling up to it. Of course, if you are not, that is well enough. I would bring you servings."

Emma knew that if she were cramped into her room any longer with her voice, she would react to it, and she wanted to avoid that for as long as she could. And she knew the voice wouldn't dare to hurt her in front of people, or risk her own safety. She swallowed back her fear and nodded.

"Yes, please...I...I would l-like to s-sit with you."

Terra smiled brightly. "That is such good news, my dear! Oh, right, I have to help you...where was my head?" she giggled nervously and began her daughter's daily routine, though with far less personal input. She helped where she needed but otherwise loomed only protectively, just in case Emma needed help.

When they were through and Emma was decently dressed, she was guided down to the small kitchen so that there would be no chance anyone could bump into them unannounced and unwelcome. There were four seats pulled out along the oak table, two on each side. And just as her mother had said, there was a wonderful assortment of foods set out on the table. There were fruits, breads, pastries, pancakes, oatmeal, sausages, eggs, omelettes, crepes and so much more. There was even half a ham and a golden, tasty looking turkey!

Emma was amazed, and hungry. Her stomach growled, much to her embarrassment. Her mother simply giggled and helped her to a chair. She reached for one of the pastries and was surprised when her mother didn't stop her. She bit into the warm, toasty bread and smiled as the sweet, blueberry jam washed over her tongue.

She was so enthralled by her pastry she didn't notice that Cadence entered the kitchen carrying a small tray of drinks. "Emma!" she shouted happily and hurried over to set the tray down. "You've decided to eat with us? Oh, this is amazing!" she reached down to hug the girl, very tightly. "You'll sit near me, won't you? Of course, that is if your mother would not mind?"

Terra laughed. "I do not mind. I am just pleased she is out of her room." as she said it she leaned down to kiss her daughter's cheek, which made her daughter lean away, to try and avoid it, though it of course ended in failure. "We haven't had a family sitting in a while, so I am very thankful."

Emma looked at her mother, surprised. "Family?" did that mean her brother would eat with them? Or even her uncle and his children? "Is...is Ben eating with us?"

"I asked him to sup with us, yes," Terra said. "He should be here any moment. And don't you worry Emma, if he starts anything, I'll be sure to end it."

Emma gasped and sat aside her pastry. "He doesn't know I'm h-here?"

Terra's face turned white as snow. "I...I didn't exactly say you weren't here. He didn't ask and I—"

"He doesn't like me, mother!"

Cadence reached across the table to touch soothe the princess. "Emma, calm yourself, please. If your brother is going to act out, we will stop him, just calm down and—"

"No!" she cried. "Take me back to my room! Now! Now!"

"What the hell is everyone screaming about in here?"

They all turned to see Benjamin walk into the small kitchen and everyone quieted. Immediately the siblings' eyes locked. Emma looked away quickly and mumbled under her breath that she wasn't hungry, that she was ready to head back to her room now, while her brother stood stiff by the door, staring.

"This is nonsense," Cadence snapped, hand on the girl's shoulder. "You two are blood! Stop this craziness now! You will sit down with your mother and break your fast, together!"

That unfroze the prince. He looked away sharply. "I won't sup with her."

"Benjamin!" Cadence gasped.

"You didn't tell me she would be here," he said, facing his mother, brows furrowed. "And if you had, I would have turned you down. I won't be here if she is. End of story. If you want me here, she goes. If you want her here, I go."

Terra stood. "Please Benjamin, I love you both, don't do this, not today," she cried. "I know you're frustrated and afraid, but this isn't your sister's fault. Do not do this. Not to her."

Benjamin shook his head. "I've lost my appetite." and then he turned and walked away. When he was gone, Emma started to cry.

"You...you should of—of just l-let me go," she said. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

Cadence said, "Emma, you have nothing to apologize for. You have done nothing wrong. It is your brother that is acting out, that has done terrible things to you."

"But...but everything is my fault," she mumbled, drying her eyes with her knuckles. "He's right..."

Terra sighed. "Oh Emma...none of this is your fault. Even if you think that it is, that is only your pain and fear speaking. I know it is difficult for you to trust others on this, but you need to try. Your brother, and this is not an excuse it is a reason for his actions, is just lost in a grief he has not experienced before. It does not out shadow your own, it doesn't mean you are not yourself in any grief, it just means he handles it differently than you...he hurts those around him when he's in pain. Even kin."

"W-what am I supposed to do?"

Cadence sighed. "Ignore the ignorant ass," she suggested. "Until he turns around and apologizes, or treat him how he treats you, but two wrongs do not make a right as the old saying goes. It is up to you, really."

Emma sniffed. I don't know what to do...I know he hates me now. No matter what they say, it was my fault. Camb would be here if it wasn't for me...

Her voice snarled. You pitiful idiot! Here is my suggestion; kill that brother of yours. He has gotten away with too much for too long. It is time to put him in his place.

No, she said back to the voice, and in her mind she pictured a little piece of paper being crumpled into a ball until the voice vanished. No matter what her brother did to her, no matter what he said to her or how he treated her, she would never hurt him. She would never wish for him to be hurt, not like that.

"I'd just like to g-go to my room now please," she said, letting her tears fall.

Terra looked at Cadence and made a small gesture. The young woman moved quickly to the princess' side. "Of course Emma. If that's what you truly wish. Here, I'll help you to your room and we can—"

"No, I can...I can do it myself." she gently took her arm out of the woman's hand and carefully removed herself from the seat to leave the kitchen.

••••••••••••

It was unbearable for her to watch. She felt as if someone was digging a dagger into her heart whenever she saw the poor girl in pain. It was unfair that she was made to suffer so much, especially now by her own kin. By her brother of all things. And for what? For things that she could not control, for something that she did not cause, for something that she should get sympathy for, not guilt and hatred.

It boiled her blood. She wanted to beat Benjamin back to his senses!

"Oh! If only you would smack some sense back into your son Terra!"

"Cadence, please, he's—"

"Terra, damn it, stop!" Cadence snapped. "You cannot keep giving him room to act this way just because he's hurt! He cannot be allowed to treat your daughter like this anymore!"

"I know that," she said sharply. "but acting like he's earnest right now is wrong! You know he's just in pain! He just needs time. I'm not saying it is right what he is doing or that we should ignore what he is doing, I just...I just don't want..." she covered her eyes. "I don't know what to do anymore...if Edgar was here, he would know what to do. He would handle them."

"Terra..."

"Now I'm stuck between two hard situations. I can seemingly pick my daughter's side or my son's side, and be stuck with one or the other hating me. Do you know what that is like Cadence? No...no you do not. You won't until you have children."

"Now come on Terra, you know they could never think that way—"

"Emma already does," she interrupted. "And I do not blame her. I sent her away her entire life! And why? Because of other people's fears and bigotry, and my hesitation with the situation only makes it seem like I'm taking her brother's side more and more, and it hurts her. I know it does. I can see it in her eyes. She will never know how much I love her, how much I would do just for her..."

"You just have to keep trying Terra, that's all. For right now that means dealing with your son though. He needs to stop what he is doing to Emma. It isn't right, even if he is in pain. She's going to break if he keeps putting pressure on her wounds."

"I know, but what can I do? He doesn't listen to me. He will just scream if I try. It is as if he loses all sense when I bring up the subject, like he loses his mind Cadence. I've never seen anything like it."

"We must keep trying, for both their sake. Kin is too important to push away and treat this way." she thought for a moment. "What if we get Sabin to help us with Benjamin? He adores his uncle, doesn't he? If anyone can help us convince the lad to change his mind, it will be Sabin."

"He has tried, but I suppose it is better than the tactics I have been trying. I can invite him over for the celebration."

"Good," Cadence smiled. "That will be a great start. We can tackle the issue together. The fool will have nowhere to run with three united fronts."

Terra smiled and rubbed her tears away with a smile. "If the gods are good, I will have my family back and soon."

Cadence reached over to hug her. "You will Terra, you will."

••••••••••••

Emma returned to her room quickly, feeling a strange anger in her heart that frightened her. She pinpointed it to the voice, for there was a tingle in her mind that reminded her of it. She fought it back, that anger, as she locked herself up in her room. She had thought the morning would be good, that the day would be good—that maybe the days leading to the celebration would turn around. She had wanted it, if only for her mother, but she should have known better. Nothing ever turned out right.

She sat at the end of her bed and leaned her head into her knees, exhausted and hungry. Why? She thought. I try my hardest, I do...I try and nothing ever goes my way.

There was a rapid knock on her door then, ripping her from her thoughts. She knew it was Cadence. She puffed angrily and drew herself into a hug. She was not in the mood to see anyone, especially those involved in bringing her to sup without telling her about their little trick.

"Emma, please, let me in...I just want to speak with you. Just for a few minutes." when it was clear that she was not going to answer, Cadence tapped the door again and said, louder, "I didn't want to bring this up, but I will. You made me a promise girl before I left with my father. We haven't discussed that promise yet, have we? If you will not let me in to talk about what your idiotic brother did down stairs you will open this damn door and let me in so we can at least talk about that, or so help me I will bring this door down myself."

Emma blushed. She had made a promise, but what was more, she did not want Cadence bursting in and causing a scene. She hating being scolded, least of all by people who were not her parents. So Emma sighed and picked herself up off the floor to open the door. As soon as the door was open, Cadence charged in and closed the door behind her.

"Making me stand out there like some bumpkin," she said, crossing her arms. Emma looked down, ashamed. "You are very lucky I am quite smitten with you...now as I said, I will not pester you with what just happened if you are so hell bent on avoiding it." she sighed. "However, I am extremely serious about those celebration wishes of yours. Especially now. Have you thought of anything? We're only a few days away now and I need something to give to your mother, to lift her spirits."

Emma hadn't thought of anything specific at all, but she knew that didn't matter. "I haven't but...but books and instruments would—would be fine."

"You were supposed to be thinking of specifics," she shook her head. "Dear girl, whatever am I supposed to do with you? I can't just go to her with something like that. I could have easily suggested that. I need something that seems like you might told me in confidence, even by accident. It can't just be anything!"

"Oh..." she mumbled, having not thought about that. Now that she knew, she felt even more guilty and pressured. What do I do? What do I ask for? The only thing she could think of was what she had already asked Alexander for. Suddenly flustered, and afraid, she looked around her room, tumbling through her mind pathetically for anything.

I don't know...I don't have anything I want. It isn't like they can bring Cambyses back, or father or... and then she froze. Cadence noticed immediately. "Emma? Are you alright?" but the princess hesitantly turned away and went over to her dresser as quiet as a mouse. She dug through the things on the dresser until her fingers grazed over the letter her father had sent her and then she knew what she wanted, but she felt too ashamed to ask for it.

She lifted the letter to roll her fingers over the elegant handwriting of her father, unaware tears had collected anew in her eyes until she felt Cadence press a hand on her shoulder. She had approached, knowing. "Emma, it is alright to miss him..."

"What..."

Don't! Her voice slithered out of her hiding spot. Don't you dare!

"May...may I ask for...for a letter?"

Cadence looked at her with a stunned expression. "Is that all you truly want? A letter from your father?"

"If that's possible," she mumbled, blushing.

Cadence smiled. "I will pass that information to Terra, just remember that if you get that letter, you have to act surprised. I am supposed to get this information from you without you knowing."

Emma smiled. "Okay, I will."

"Then I'll be sure to pass it along," Cadence giggled. "And Emma, about the other thing..."

"No," she said quickly. "I don't want to talk about it."

"I know," Cadence said quickly. "I do, I know, I just want you to know that if you change your mind...I am here for you. Whenever you want."

Emma knew talking about her brother wasn't going to solve anything. He believed she was responsible for her brother and father going to war, for her brother's disappearance, and nothing short of them returning would change that. And if that wasn't going to change, talking it over wasn't going to make her feel better, least of all with people who set up the situation she's in now, even if their intentions were good. She just wasn't in the mood whatsoever.

"I'm fine Cadence," she mumbled.

"If you say so," the young woman conceded with a sigh. "I suppose then I'll see you for the celebration?" she asked as she went back to the door. She paused to glance back with a smile. Emma didn't have time to consider. "Good! I'll hold you to it Emma!" and then she was gone, leaving Emma in a daze.

"What...just happened?" the girl said aloud.

••••••••••••

Cadence had entirely intended to chat the girl up about the ordeal, to try and convince her that despite her brother's actions, there was still love in his heart somewhere through all that darkness, though it was no excuse for his actions, but she had been adamant about not hearing it.

Still, she wasn't entirely empty handed. The princess unexpectedly caved easily on her promise to consider the celebration and gift requests, and the one thing she asked for had warmed Cadence to near tears. It took all her will power not to pull the girl into a hug then and there and sob like she had just finished a really good novella. Of course, if she had done that she was sure Emma would have become very flustered and refused whatever she had opened up about.

Now she just needed to find Terra and inform her of what she found out. Luckily for her, the woman was almost always in the same three places lately. If she wasn't with her daughter, she was with her generals trying to dig up information on her husband and son or the war, or if not there, desperately trying to keep the kingdom afloat in her husband's place with the help of her brother-in-law.

Today, she was participating in the later, and looking absolutely exhausted. Her skin was pale like milk and she looked as if she hadn't slept for days. She was talking to a local lord about his farms being robbed for the third time that month, and he was furious. He was barely letting her speak.

"I cannot feed my family if I cannot sell crops, your majesty! I cannot plant crops if I have no men to plant them and I will have no men if I do not have the means to pay them! Something must be done about the burglars!"

Terra lifted her hands to calm him. "I understand your frustrations and misfortune my lord, I do—"

"How could you? You live in a castle, with gold at your disposal any moment you need it!"

"I wasn't always a queen, my lord," she spoke suddenly, and Cadence could hear she was losing her patience just a little. "I was a mother of ten, a farmer and a governess of a land plagued with bandits and monsters alike that stole from or attacked me and mine almost daily. I do know what troubles like yours feels like quite well."

The lord shamefully lowered his eyes. "I...I apologize, my queen, I forgot you come from humble beginnings."

Terra softened immediately. "All is well. The times are troubling, and that sets us in a mood we cannot truly be faulted for. For your predicament, I cannot completely solve them as more troubles could replace them, but for now I can do nothing more than to offer men to sweep the land for your burglars and stay with you until they can be caught. Should they be brave enough to rear their heads with Figaro steel on your land, of course. I can grant you ten swords, but that is all I'm afraid."

The lord ducked his head, thankful. "That is more than I have, my queen, thank you." when he was dismissed, Terra relaxed into her throne with a heavy sigh.

Cadence approached slowly. "You handled that well. You have better restraint than I do."

Terra looked over her shoulder with a small smile. "That man was just afraid Cadence. How could I lose my anger on him?"

Cadence laughed. "It is like I said. You have better restraint than I do. I would have scolded him...or slapped him."

The queen giggled. "I don't believe that," she looked towards the doors with a sad expression. "Though I suppose you shouldn't follow me as a queen. You should be your own queen."

Cadence blushed a little. It was true she had dreams of marrying Cambyses, of being his wife and queen, but those were just that—dreams. It would be foolishness to expect them to become reality, at least right now. However, to hear the queen to say something like that made her feel more like...Emma.

"I'm afraid no queen could compare to you," she recovered her composure quickly as she came to stand beside the queen. "Terra, I have come to talk to you about Emma." that made the woman sit up immediately. "Now, don't worry, she is fine, but unfortunately I could not get her to speak to me about the incident earlier."

"What then could have happened?"

"Something good, I promise," she said and then explained without revealing that she and Emma were working together to give Terra a chance to gift Emma something, potentially for the last time as she was growing up now. She crafted a good lie she thought, that she uncovered Emma's flustered happiness over her father's letter and her gentle and unspoken request to receive more.

Terra was up on her feet immediately, lit with excitement. "This is perfect! Oh thank you Cadence, thank you, thank you!" she took the young woman into her arms tightly. "I just knew there was something she could have wanted, I just knew it."

"I believe her though, just that before then she just didn't have anything she could think of," Cadence said as she pulled away from the hug. "If you want that letter to arrive in time though, you should hurry."

"Oh yes, you're right, of course!" she gasped and started to hurry away, lifting the ends of her skirt. She stopped halfway down the small stairs to look back at Cadence. "Thank you...thank you so much." and then she was off again.

Cadence giggled. The Figaro family was one wonderful family when they weren't in the worst of moments.

••••••••••••

Despite revealing to Cadence that she just wanted a letter from her father, and feeling a little better, that evaporated quickly. She was again feeling angry and sad over her confrontation with her brother earlier that day. She knew she had to get her mind off her brother, off all her troubles, but she had no idea how to. Everything and everyone reminded her of him.

This is harder than I thought, she laid down on her bed, across on her belly, to stare out her window at the afternoon sky. The desert during the winter months was still rather warm during the day, so she could get away with having her windows open, but the splendid heat that she had grown to adore (which took getting used to of course) had vanished to winter's touch. The garden had begun to wither as well, though she knew come spring it would be back. Now the scent that wafted through the window was verdure and dry, and cold, though it was charming in its own way she supposed.

How hard could it be to disregard the thoughts and feelings of a completely useless human being? her voice asked, slithering out of her constraints. Emma struggled to contain her, but the voice broke her shackles almost easily. How could you find it difficult to stop loving someone who no longer loves you?

It isn't that easy! she snapped.

Yes, it actually is.

Love isn't a switch you can just press on or off whenever you want!

How would you know that? the voice demanded. You have never known it. And for all that you know, that boy never loved you like a sister in the first place. That quieted Emma. Her voice was right. She wasn't sure any of what she felt was love, or if their words were honest, or the emotions she received from people were properly perceived. They could have been anything. Give up on them as they have given up on you. You will feel better when you have. The change...the power...the freedom. You will thank me.

And then driving her from her thoughts and away from her voice, came several loud, persistent knocks on her door. Emma lifted herself off her bed quickly, thankful for the intrusion, and used the distraction to put her voice back into her cage. She fought back tooth and nail, but with great vigor, Emma had won.

Relaxing for a moment, she dropped back into her bed with a smile. She had won again, but she had almost listened to her voice. Almost released herself to that anger...

The knocks returned again, this time louder, and accompanied with a voice. "Princess, are you awake?" Again she sat up, so quickly she got a headache. Alexander! She gasped and hurried over to the door even as she fixed her hair, panicking. When she opened the door, he smirked at her and stepped into the room uninvited. "Good evening, princess." he glanced around her room quickly before looking at her stumped face. "Is it a problem that I am here right now? I could come back later."

She blushed and closed her door. "No...it is fine." she shyly followed him further into her room, hands twisting through each other as she watched him casually look around.

"I don't see any towers of gifts lying around yet," he said suddenly, turning to her with a brow raised. "You really haven't asked for anything yet?"

Her blush deepened. He was already giving her what she really wished for, and then there was the letter... "It...it isn't even the solstice yet."

"It will be very soon, but still, I bet you haven't said anything to your mother yet," he said, rubbing thoughtfully at his chin as he surveyed the room again. "You could definitely fit a piano right there. Or perhaps another bookshelf for dozens of more literature."

She giggled. "There is barely room in here!"

Alexander laughed. "Then I hope there's enough room for one more at least," and then he reached into the confines of his coat and recovered something small and rectangular. Her eyes widened as he held it out to her. "I hope you didn't think I could forget about you."

Her mind caught on his words, though she knew he did not mean them the way she took them. The way she had hoped. She reached for the gift with trembling hands, too nervous now by what he could mean. Her eyes were immediately pulled to the fact that the gift was wrapped in old newspaper clippings and pages from books. She looked up at him, brows furrowed, and he chuckled at her expression. "Is it too much?"

She giggled and shook her head. "No...I...I was just wondering why...why is it wrapped in pages?"

He scratched at his neck and shifted on spot. "I don't know, I guess it well...reminded me of you...I don't know..." he sighed. "I thought it would be sort of, well, less personal if I wrapped it the way others did on celebrations, so I just did what I..." he hesitated. "You like to read so I just thought it would be something personal to add to the gift. Now that I think about it, it seems stupid."

Emma had never seen him like this before, so nervous, so unsure of what to say, and when she looked at his face, there was something about it that she hadn't seen on it before, but she couldn't pinpoint it. It was strange, but it was also very precious to her in a way. She was seeing a part of him she had never seen before, a part he felt—whether he realized it or not—he could reveal to her.

"No," she said quickly. "It...it isn't stupid at all. I mean, I...I l-love it."

"You might not when you open it," he mumbled, eyes downcast. Emma almost thought he was...shy. She watched his face attentively, captivated by the foreign emotions he was displaying. "You know what...never mind the gift." he reached for it, and she could see a gentle shade of red on his cheeks. "I will take it back and get you something else, something far more fitting for you." Before he could take the box back from her hands, she startled and stepped back.

"No! I mean, I'm—I'm sure I'll love it, please...let me keep it."

Alexander's lavender eyes locked onto hers for a second before going to the gift and then back to her. "Alright. You can feel free to hit me with it if it isn't to your liking." she simply smiled at him before she started to open it. She peeled the page wrapping off it delicately, to save it.

Alexander watched carefully, amused at the delicacy and aptitude she showed. She always did such odd things, things that were so trivial to most, and yet to him he couldn't help but notice them and adore them. Was he just being stupid to notice such small details about her? Did it matter in the end?

A slight gasp awoke him from his thoughts and he saw an unbelieving expression cross her face. Was that good? He couldn't tell, and it was starting to unnerve him.

Emma picked the book out of the box and ran a finger across the leathery jacket of the book, tracing the words, she spoke the name of the novella aloud in a gentle whisper. "The Swan." it was one of Ladio's novellas, and one of his most cherished and rarest literature.

When he saw her eyes misted with tears, fear bubbled in his heart. Did he make a mistake? Was the worn down leather of the book too obvious? The pages too worked? He tried to explain. "I looked everywhere I could, but Ladio is a well chased novelist, so finding fresher copies was difficult so I thought...well I thought my copy would do." he cleared his throat. "It isn't in the best of states, I have had it since I was younger than you, but..."

The world had suddenly stopped just for her. She could hardly believe what she had just heard. "This...this is yours?" she asked as she held the book close to her, fearful now that he would try and take it back, for her love for it had already increased tenfold simply because it belonged to him.

"Aye, it was mine, my mother got it during a business trip when I was younger, and then gave it to me some time later. I hope you don't mind, but I left some comments in most of the margins. If it does bother you, again, I...I could get you something else."

Why he is so nervous? She wondered. It wasn't like he was in her position. He had gotten her something, and she hadn't gotten him anything, though then she remembered that it was common practice that those receiving things during the celebration were children. And he's not a child. He's a man and you are just a girl...an unimportant simpleton.

She held the book back toward him. "I can't. I mean, I love it, but it was a gift from your mother...I—I cannot t-take it from you."

"You aren't taking anything," he said firmly, his earlier uncommon behavior completely gone. "I'm giving it to you. My mother wouldn't mind in this regard anyway, I'm sure of it, besides I'm read it countless times. It is time it found a more fitting home with someone who has never been graced its fine read before."

Emma blushed, a little frustrated by his generosity and her inability to discern his reasons. "Why though?"

"Do you question everyone like this, or just me?" he asked with a stiff laugh. She was taken aback by that and looked away. He immediately understood what that came off as and sighed. "Emma, I didn't mean anything by it, I'm sorry. It is just...sometimes it is hard to say things to you or do things for you because you are so...what is the right word? Difficult...stubborn...no...maybe that's it, I don't know, it isn't bad, it is just hard."

"I'm sorry," she offered softly, looking down at the book, familiar pain rushing her in painful sweeps. She had screwed up, again.

Alexander realized he was making it worse every time he spoke. He took her hand, which was trembling. He squeezed it. "I'm sorry Emma, that came out...wrong. I just meant that...that sometimes it hurts that you question me and my motives, but I understand it, I do." he sighed. "I just let it bother me sometimes, for really immature and stupid reasons. I know why you question the things around you, I do, but just as you can't help questioning them, sometimes I can't help the way I feel...but I am sorry. I am." he pressed her hand against the book with a small smile. "Please, keep the book. I want you have it and if you must or want to know why, it is because..." he let his sentence drag on for a second before he sighed. "because I just like you." and that unintentional slip had flew out out of his mouth before he could correct himself.

When she started to cry, his heart stopped. He reached out to touch her shoulder and was going to ask if she were okay, but stopped himself. It didn't feel right. "Emma, please, I'm sorry...why are you crying? Please, I'm sorry, really, I...I didn't mean any of it the way it sounded."

And then she knuckled away her tears and sniffed, showing him that smile that smothered him in emotions he couldn't understand. "That's...that's the n-nicest thing someone has ever s-s-said to me," she mumbled. "I'm j-just happy."

He stared at her for a long moment, just noticing the tiny scare over her lip, the most fragile and yet charming thing he had ever seen. Was that there before her assault? He couldn't remember but he knew he'd remember he'd loved it from this day onward. He realized he wanted nothing more than to touch the scar, to touch her lips...to touch her. The thought terrified him for reasons he did not understand.

He just watched her flip through the book carefully, as if it were about to fall apart, and see the pain in her eyes subside. It was that kind of glimpse that took his breath away. She hardly showed it but when she did he was sure nothing could beat it in beauty. It was like seeing the sun set for the very first and very last time. It opened a window in her being she kept tightly shut, against everyone.

What had he done? He could see it, the glimpses of unintended feelings being developed for him beyond anything that could be undone, the consequences of his actions just as Cadence had said would happen. He could see the gears turning in the princess' eyes; the way she looked at him, the smiles, the laughter and opening up to only him. And he could see her own ignorance to what was happening, and the crushing wave of pain it would bring her when she realized he was not fighting for her heart the way she would want him to, that he just didn't like her like that.

And then it hit him; it was obvious he felt something for her, but was it what she wanted? Was it something he was willing to give her? Looking at her, the way her lips turned up whenever she laughed or how the gentlest of dimples appeared whenever her smile got too bright, it made him wonder...would it be so bad to try, even if what he felt wasn't close to what she wanted? To tie himself down to this...to this girl? This fragile girl?

She looked up at him through the curly tendrils of her hair, framing her roundish face. "I love it." she whispered, looking back at the gift. "Thank you Alexander."

And then Alexander knew. It was a bad idea. Emma deserved everything good in the world and giving her false hope was wrong. To make her believe there was something between them, or to believe there could be, was a horrible thing to do, even if that was unintentional on his part. To know it now, he had to end it.

He could not offer her what she needed, what he knew she deserved. He was a scoundrel, he was not good for her. Cadence knew, she understood, she warned him. He didn't want to hurt Emma, he didn't want to betray her. He didn't want to encourage something he never wanted, never thought about. He just wanted to help her, to show her that the way she thought about herself was wrong, that she was worth something, but now he regretted it. She was going to feel more pain if he continued on. What had he done?

He needed to leave. He needed to talk to Cadence. "Will you tell me?" he suddenly asked and she looked at him, confused. "When you read it? I'd like to hear what you think about it."

That smile returned to her face. "Yes, I will." she answered sweetly, and perhaps he saw too much into it, but it pained him more.

"Alright then," he said, feeling weak. "I will see you later then Emma. Please...have a good day." and then he leaned over to kiss her cheek before he left, berating himself for making yet another stupid decision yet knowing if he just charged out of the room it would upset her or look strange for him, since kissing her cheek or hand goodbye had become commonplace.

Gods...what have I done?

••••••••••••

Alexander knew he was fleeing from a girl and her emotions, and that it was cowardly, and yet he did not stop. Thinking about it only increased his desire to be as far away from the princess as possible. He could still taste the vanilla on his lips from the contact of her cheek and smell the honey of on her hair, and feel the warmth of her and it was just too much.

Fuck, he thought as he stormed his way down the stairs, his thoughts in ruins. Why did I ever to attend that stupid dinner? I don't want to hurt her, not even unintentionally. Gods, why didn't I just listen to Cadence? And then he stopped in his tracks. What was he thinking? He couldn't go to Cadence with this! He couldn't tell her that the princess was beginning to fall for him! She would chew him out, maybe worse! And yet he needed someone to talk to—someone to get advice from. It shamed him on who that would be, but he had no choice.

When he arrived at his father's small cubicle, where he was drafting new plans, he felt so foolish. He knocked on the frame of the cubicle, catching his father's attention. "Alexander?" he sat down his plans and looked over at the grandfather clock ."It is so early...shouldn't you still be with Emma?"

He pinked a little. It had become such a habit of his to be with the princess that it was known to everyone now. "Father, I need to speak with you about something..."

That made his father stiffen. "Alright, I can see this is serious." he motioned for his son to come closer. "What's going on? Should I be worried for your safety?"

"No, it is just...private. You have to promise not to react like a ninny, promise me."

He considered it and then nodded reluctantly. "Fine. I promise. Now tell me what the matter is."

Alexander knew the best way to start was to explain that he hadn't meant Emma any harm, that he adored her, just not in that way, that he respected her and wanted everything good in life for her, but the words just fumbled out of his mouth like an absolute train wreck. By the time that he got out what he had planned to do with Emma, his father was furious and on his feet.

"You what?!" he grabbed Alexander by the collar of his shirt and lifted him up. "How dare you boy!"

"Father, I honestly didn't mean any harm!"

"Your intentions mean nothing to me! To her! Your actions do! This is why I told you to stay away before!"

"I understand that now, please, I'm...I'm trying to make it stop, to make it better, but I need help," he said, squirming out of his father's hands. "I know I fucked up. I don't want to hurt her father, I don't. She doesn't deserve to be hurt again, and I like her too much to have wanted that or wish to see it."

"It is too late for that. No matter what you do now, she will be hurt."

Alexander looked away. "Then what do I do? Pretend I like her?"

"Of course not," he grumbled. "You shouldn't have done any of this stupid shit in the first place. Well, have you talked with Cadence about this yet?" he shook his head. "Good. For now, just try to keep your distance from the girl. You need to cut those feelings short now while you can."

Alexander sighed. "What if it is too late?"

His father laid a hand on his shoulder. "You better hope it isn't too late, for that girl's sake. She's been through enough as it is."

Alexander felt immense shame and guilt, and something else he wasn't quite sure of. He hadn't meant for any of this, to lead Emma into anything, and yet he had. It was undoubtedly the most horrible thing he had ever done in his life and would ever do in his life. He knew his father was right, that the best thing he could do then was to keep his distance some, until he could at least figure out what to do, to explain to Emma his intentions and how he truly felt.

••••••••••••

Emma had spent almost the entire next day reading the book, absolutely engrossed, not only in the literature but equally (moreso really) in Alexander's thoughts written in chicken scratch in the margins. Sometimes he squeezed in clever witticisms that made her giggle and other times comments she didn't quite understand and others she now understood perfectly that made her blush centered around pieces of the novella's romantic arcs.

During the afternoon, Cadence stopped by with food to break her fast, as she hadn't stepped out of her room to eat breakfast (which of course was not out of the ordinary) or leave a note for the soldiers to have it delivered to her (which was). Emma had been so preoccupied by the novella she hadn't even noticed Cadence until the woman sat the tray down and swiped the book out of her hands.

Emma let out a surprise gasp before she looked back and saw the tall woman standing with her arms crossed and an equally crossed expression. The book sat divided by pages by her finger, left at the page she had been at. "Emma Aden Aria Figaro!" she flinched. Somehow, Cadence had managed to sound just like her mother when she said her full name like that. "To skip your midday lunch is one thing, but to skip breaking your morning fast and your midday meal together is an entirely different thing!"

Emma looked down, flushed. "I'm sorry...I lost track of time."

Cadence let out a long sigh, releasing her pent up anger immediately. She held out the book. "Really now, you are such a handful sometimes..." Emma gently took the book back, still keeping her eyes downcast. "Please do not make this a regular occurrence. From now on, you are to leave a schedule beside your calendar. You will check off eating as you do a day. You cannot risk your health, do you understand that Emma?"

"Yes, Cadence." she mumbled.

And then Cadence looked at the book. "What are you reading that could distract you of all people from eating?"

Emma smiled brightly and showed it to the woman. "It is called 'The Swan' by Ladio and it is w-wonderful."

"A period piece," Cadence said, remembering it, and recognizing the novella in the girl's hands as the copy of Alexander's, and yet she asked regardless. "And where did you get that? Ladio is a very difficult man to find the work of these days." she knew that Alexander's parents had been gifted that book many years ago during a delivery by a very wealthy man, and they later passed it down to Alexander. It was one of his most precious gifts.

Without hesitation Emma said, "Alexander gave it to me."

"I see," Cadence wondered just how far this was going to go before Alexander saw it for what it was. She at least hoped Emma had built up the courage to tell the fool how she felt. "And when he was giving you this gift, did you finally tell him how you felt?" and then she knew the instant the girl's cheeks turned red that it was a no. "I suspected as much..."

"It...it wasn't the right time and—"

"With that kind of attitude you will never think it is the right time."

"But—"

"Listen to me Emma," she took the princess by the arm and led her to the bed to sit her down. "What is the worst that can happen? He declines you?"

Emma couldn't even think of that. If she had built the courage to tell him and he rejected her, she didn't think she could face that. She looked away. "I can't Cadence...I...I don't know how and...and I don't even know what I feel."

"You feel something for him, don't you?" she asked, and Emma thought enough on it to nod. That much was obvious. "Then that is all you should tell him. Just be honest. Take him aside and tell him that you feel something for him just that you don't know what, and that you just wanted to tell him."

Emma felt tears in her eyes. "What if he...if he says..."

"Rejection hurts Emma," Cadence said softly. "but I promise you that telling him, regardless of how he feels towards you, is going to make you feel better. If he doesn't like you, you will get the emotional support to push forward, away from him, and if he does...well..." though Cadence knew that was not going to happen it didn't need to be said. What Emma needed to know was that discussing it was an important step in her life.

"What if he doesn't even want to be my friend?"

Cadence laughed. "That would never happen Emma, trust me," she patted the girl's shoulder. "Tell him, alright?"

Emma sighed. "I'll...I'll try."

"Good," she said, turning to the tray of food. "Now, let's eat and we can—" there was an interruption at the door, brisk and loud. Urgent. "Gods, if it isn't one thing it is the other." she left the tray uncovered to answer the door. Emma reached over to pluck some of the food off the little plates, delicious little breads full of meaty soup, as she waited.

Emma heard the whispers and immediately knew something had happened that she was not supposed to know about.

"Her majesty requests your immediate presence," the soldier whispered.

Cadence's voice was even quieter, and Emma knew it was because the woman knew of her sensitive hearing. "Tell her I will be there in a moment, that I'm with her daughter."

"She pressed the urgency, m'lady," the soldier said with a tone that reached further than anxiety. "Please, you need to come with me now. I...I mustn't say why, not here."

Emma sat her aside the little pastry as Cadence hurried back into the room, a little pale with worry. "Emma, I must be off for a while, but I will return shortly."

"Where...where are you going?"

"It appears I forgot something in my haste, something I promised I would do for your mother and uncle in regards to the war effort," she explained quickly, and Emma wondered if she would have detected the lie had she not heard the conversation at the door. "Stay here and wait for me. I will return, and with something sweeter than midday meals to break your fast." she tried to warm Emma with a smile, but the falter and anxiety in her eyes revealed much more.

Emma tried to speak, but stopped. She nodded and waited until Cadence left, and the sound of their footsteps retreated down the hall. Something happened, she thought, suddenly very terrified.

Something they think you do not deserve to know, her voice whispered. Get up now. Run.

Emma felt sick to her stomach thinking of the possibility of what it could mean. What if Roskovo attacked Figaro soil? What if...what if...

There is no sense in just sitting here wondering, her voice hissed. Let us find out. You know where mother will be. She did know, and yet Emma hesitated. The horrors of what it could be frightened her more than her fear to know to react drove her. Think. If Roskovo is here, you need to know. You know your family will not tell you. They do not think you deserve to know.

What could I even do if I knew?

Run, the voice whispered, fading as the words repeated. Run.

••••••••••••

The soldier had refused to say anything until they cleared the wing that housed the princess' quarters, in fear she might hear a snippet of what they might discuss. It was so terribly frightening that one word of it could be heard not by the poor princess. Cadence feared what that meant, and it quickened her step.

Once they were clear of the hall, Cadence pressed him. "Please, you must tell me what this is about." her heart was beating so fast.

The soldier was drawing her closer to the war room as he spoke. "Her majesty instructed me she wished to inform you privately of the matter, that I must bring you to her immediately." as soon as they neared the war room's double doors, they opened and Hals appeared. He glanced at her quickly and then ushered her in. The soldier beside her quietly took a place with the others outside, all of which were trying to keep their eyes from her.

Hals said, "Quickly now, inside, the queen awaits," and then he closed the door behind her. Inside the war room, Cadence saw Terra pacing a short line at one side of the table, trembling and tear stricken. At the other side of the table, Sabin leaned against it, trying to hide his face from them, but she knew immediately what it meant. He had been crying and feared the others seeing him.

Terra stopped to fling herself into Cadence's arms and with a sob, she said the words that did not surprise Cadence but still tore her heart to pieces. "They have him" she cried, trembling in Cadence's arms. "They have my baby boy." A part of Cadence had known, deep down, that Cambyses had not simply gotten lost in the foreign land of Roskovo, but she had held out hope that it had come down to it. And yet here she stood, holding the mother of the man she loved, hearing for certain that he was being held by an enemy that had done truly monstrous things to a child and would certainly show no mercy upon him as well. She wished to cry too, but she knew now and at this place it was not right. She needed to be strong—not only for Terra, but for Cambyses and his little sister too.

She wrapped her arms around Terra and fought back her tears. She knew, wherever Cambyses was, he was not sniffling. He was thinking of his family, of a way to get away, to be strong. "It hurts Terra, but we must be strong," she whispered. "If not for him...think of Emma. We must not let her know, not yet. It will break her."

"She's right," Sabin muttered, standing up straight, eyes hard but betraying that he had cried. "We cannot afford to let her lose her wits right now. If she hears about this, we will have a crisis on our hands. I know it will be difficult Terra, but you have to stand strong."

"How can you ask me this right now?" she snapped, pulling away from Cadence. "I have known that my son is a prisoner of war for less than an hour!"

"You know why," Sabin said almost coldly.

Terra glared at him for a moment before looking away with a sigh. "We can't hide this from her, you all know this. It is only a matter of time...especially if Edgar decides to send another letter. The council is sniffing about more and more. If they catch wind..."

"Perhaps not for long," Hals agreed. "but we can hide it long enough."

"Until?" she asked him. "There won't ever be a good time to tell her that her brother is being held by...by the people who..."

Cadence placed a hand on the queen's arm. "Terra...I understand what you mean, but as Sabin said, we cannot deal with her reaction right now, especially not when she is so weak, so fragile."

"And when, or how, do we determine she is fit to be told?"

"We could convince Edgar not to send letters and then ask for advice on when she might be more...suitable to be told." Sabin mumbled. "And if he cannot help us, we know that Relm and Gau can control her outbursts. We could send for them immediately."

"If it were up to Edgar, he would decide not to tell her at all," Cadence said hotly.

Terra sighed. "I can't keep this from her forever. I can't."

"Wait until some time after the celebration then." Cadence suggested, knowing the girl was feeling very smitten at the moment about Alexander and that, if the gods were good, she would be directing Alexander about how she felt to finally put aside her foolish but sweet fancies. "She's been in such a good mood lately, maybe it will improve her enough to handle this terrible news. It would also be more cruel to tell her when she's finally feeling so happy after everything recently."

Terra shook her head gently, so very clearly in disagreement but unwillingly to fight it. "Fine. I will give it until after the celebration...but only until then."

"You do realize this means not telling Benjamin until then too, right?" Sabin reminded them, and the room quieted, knowing that when they did inform him it would cause a storm in the castle, and mostly for the princess.

••••••••••••

Emma had chickened out, though she supposed as the day dwindled into night that she had never seriously considered following after Cadence to learn what her mother thought was so delicate that she could not hear. There was just too much stacked against her for her to try and figure it out. If she were to even try to leave her room, she needed to first slip by the guard again, and that was just not worth it. Not again.

Instead, she spent the better half of the remaining day pondering over what it could be, obsessively and fearfully. It was obvious the more she thought about it that it was something bad, something inherently dangerous, if not for her for the entire kingdom. And the only thing she could think of that could be dangerous for the kingdom was an invasion, or an attack, from Roskovo. Either way though it lead back to her.

And then the rest of the day she tried to get her mind off of what she had thought of, the fears she had built up, but it was ineffective. She even tried reading The Swan, but it did little. She was too distracted to do much with it. She kept setting it aside and peeking towards the door, expecting someone to come in and tell her what was happening, hoping they would, and tell her what was happening, that it was just something small—something unrelated to the war, to Roskovo. It never happened.

Eventually she fell asleep, exhausted, in the chair beside her window, tucked under the warmth—and perceived safety—of a thick quilt. Cadence had not returned.

In the morning, she was awoken by the faint knock on her door. She stirred, confused, and rubbed at her eyes. It took her a moment of listening to the dulled voice murmuring through the door for her to realize, or rather remember, that it was the eve of the solstice, and that Cadence and her mother were now waking her to begin the day's joyous pre-celebration activities that would run until the solstice itself.

"Emma, sweet child, time to wake!" her mother called in a sing-song voice. Emma barely had time to sit up straight before her mother and Cadence were through the door. "Still half asleep? Well, I can't say that I am surprised." her mother giggled, before helping her daughter up. "Come now, wake up, we have quite a day ahead of us."

"We do?" she mumbled tiredly.

Cadence smirked. "Of course. You can't have a solstice without the eve's celebration and you can't have the eve's celebration without those that come before, you know. We will go to the eastern balcony and enjoy the fireworks, but before that we will gorge ourselves on a wonderful supper and talk and do so much more. The celebrations will be wondrous, and come the solstice, you will be awe struck."

Emma was still trying to wake up, but she was conscious enough to know she didn't want to attend some pre-solstice celebration event, and she knew that Cadence knew her answer would be exactly that. As she begun to form a proper way of declining, her mother's voice sprung up over the conversation.

"It will be splendid. The breakfast spread will be something to marvel, and the activities we have planned will be so much fun. I made sure to include some from Thamasa I thought you would enjoy, and I brought up the decorations from the basements so we can decorate the halls."

When Cadence saw her still sitting up in the chair, she laughed and tossed one of the pillows at her from the bed. "Come on now, get up sleepyhead, the day tires."

"Is...is it okay if I pass?"

That made her mother look at her sharply, surprised, and heart broken. It stung Emma. She looked away before the guilt made her do something that would make her uncomfortable, and terrifying. The problems of attending the celebration were numerous, but she could not face her brother today, or the other turbulent emotions in her heart. If her mother could just let her be for today without pestering...

"Emma, but..." her mother started to insist but then took a staggering breath. "Fine." she straightened herself and her eyes grew soft with sorrow but acceptance. "If you will not be attending, I see no reason in having the celebration whatsoever." she turned and left the room.

Cadence sighed. "Emma, why not just attend for your mother's sake?"

"I know what will happen if I go," Emma said, looking away from the woman's cool eyes. "You don't understand...you still think Ben cares."

"It isn't about that at all," Cadence said. "I know it is likely he will start something with you, but don't you want to spend this day with your mother? Why would you let your brother ruin it for you like this?"

Let him? She felt an anger swell in her that felt all too familiar with her voice's unnatural rage. "Why don't you guys tell him not to go instead? He's the problem!" her hot tone surprised Cadence.

That's right, her voice whispered. He is to blame. Why should you compromise? Why should you suffer even a little more than you already have? Isn't it his turn to suffer like you have?

Cadence agreed with her and rubbed at her eyes, clearly annoyed. "Of course he's the problem right now Emma, but right now your mother wants you both to go because she loves you both. The celebration isn't the same for her if you both aren't there to share it with her. Haven't you thought for a moment what it must be like for her to have her husband and son in a war, out of reach and in constant danger? Didn't you consider for one moment that she's also in pain even if it isn't the same as yours?"

That had alarmed Emma, and drove her from her anger. She hadn't considered it entirely from that point of view before. What it must be like for her as a wife and mother to have her husband and son so far away, in constant combat and fear of their life. And yet, even with her new understanding, she could still not bring herself to attend. She couldn't face her brother. Why couldn't he just behave, for one day?

Because the world around you is worth nothing, the voice whispered.

Emma closed her eyes against her growing tears, knowing the fear in her heart would come true and yet not wanting her mother to feel any worse than she was feeling now. To disappoint her any further than she already had. "Fine," she let out through a sob. "I'll go..."

"It won't do to force you to go Emma," Cadence whispered. "It wouldn't be right. The conversation now isn't about getting you to go now, but to discuss with you—"

Anger bristled, she couldn't take it any more. "So this was just to make me feel guilty? Is that it?"

"You know that isn't it," she told her, still calm despite the girl's rising anger. "Right now is about getting you to talk about this situation and to understand others around you. It isn't about making you go against your will. I would never force you to do something you are uncomfortable with, but I would try to make you confront something that might help you in the end, even if you were not to understand it until then."

Perish the thought, her voice hissed when Emma wondered if she were beginning to go crazy, suspecting everyone around her like this. You've every reason to!

A part of her knew this anger—these thoughts—were not hers and the part of her that felt fine with them terrified her. She turned her eyes away from the woman, the glare vanishing. "I'm sorry Cadence," she mumbled.

"Please, you don't have to apologize," Cadence reached to touch the girl's shoulder. "Really...this all started over the silliest of things. If you do not wish to go, Terra understands truly at the bottom of her heart, so don't you worry about it."

"I don't...I don't want her to feel bad," Emma said, sniffling.

"As your mother, she knows that," Cadence sat beside her. "Listen to me Emma...you must not confuse what she's feeling now with anger or hate. She's disappointed that her children are fighting, especially so in Ben, but she could never fault you for how you feel, even if she tries to encourage you to share things with her. She's human, after all."

"What...what should I do?"

"Whatever makes you feel safer, though to be honest I had hoped you would take the step outside your rooms to celebrate with us these coming days, but you needn't worry about it. I'll see what I can do about it in whatever way I can if you wish to celebrate with your mother though, even should I have to do something about Benjamin."

The last thing Emma wanted was Cadence scheming about. "W-wait, I just want—"

"Now now, none of that," she said, knowing that Emma would protest. "I will go talk with your mother and figure out a way around this messy situation." And then she was gone in a hurry. Emma could not get the woman to listen to her, to stop for even a second. She sat down, exhausted already for the long day ahead of her.

••••••••••••

Cadence found Terra sitting alone in the study, sniffling. She cradled a ruffled handkerchief, which she kept pressing against her nose. As Cadence approached, she felt such sorrow for the woman. To go through the things she was going through and not be able to do anything about it. As a parent it must be the most painful thing you could experience short of losing a child.

"Terra," she made herself known, but the woman did not answer her. "Please, Emma is afraid she is hurting you..."

Terra chuckled and pressed the handkerchief against her nose again. "That sounds like my little girl," she took a deep breath. "Cadence...this is so hard. Harder than anything I have ever faced. I don't know what to do, for her or for Benjamin, and I can't stand it."

"Honestly Terra, there isn't anything you can do but be there for her," Cadence went to sit beside her. "And be wise enough to intercede when you need to as a parent."

"How?"

"I know you don't want to hear it Terra and I know he is suffering in his own way too, but the first step is to stop your son from treating Emma the way that he has been treating her. You need to put your foot down."

"I have tried," she muttered. "He doesn't listen to me. He shouts back or he ignores me...I think Locke is right. I...I think there's something wrong with him. I think he's broken. I...I think I broke him."

"Don't you listen to my father," Cadence said softly. "He speaks on his emotions, and he does not like the way he sees Emma being treated, that's all. You know him. Benjamin isn't broken, he's just lost. You can set him straight Terra, as his mother, you just have to find the right way to reach him. The same way you need to with Emma...she will just be harder to reach. The place she has locked herself into is a different place than Benjamin's. The important first step to take with both of them thought is to never give up."

Terra laughed and took the young woman into a hug. "Thank you Cadence...thank you. You are so much like your mother. I often forget that."

Cadence smiled. "Now, what do you say we plan something that Emma will feel comfortable attending? We may have missed today's activities, but we still have the days leading to the solstice's eve and the solstice itself."

"I don't feel right celebrating when my children are fighting Cadence," she said through a sigh.

"Terra, please," she laid a hand on the woman's shoulder. "I know you want to spend the solstice with both your children but I think you need to understand that right now it isn't possible. They are both too hurt. The best you can do is give your daughter something to look forward to...she deserves it."

"And Benjamin?"

Cadence shook her head, clearly annoyed. "He can be dealt with later. He is an adult Terra. You aren't picking favorites, you are just...prioritizing damages. Though regardless, if he feels so heavily about it, he shouldn't act like a child about this whole thing, now should he?"

Terra wiped at her eyes and sighed. "This is going to backfire on me...I just know it." she took a deep breath. "However, I know you are right. Emma needs me more right now. She's the child. Let us plan for the solstice's eve."

••••••••••••

When it became time for the solstice's eve, Terra wanted to be sure the day's festivities were perfect for her daughter. With the help of Cadence, Celes and Sabin, it was an easier task to achieve. The lovable uncle knew a lot about what his niece would love to eat outside of permitted foods—Terra told herself it would be okay to spoil her daughter every now and then—and would be a good presence for her daughter as well.

"No, no, Sabin, over here, move it over here," she said hurriedly as the hulking man lifted the table once more and began to move it.

"Make up your mind, Terra," he laughed as he sat it in the new position facing the festival lights before the open windows. "You know Emma won't mind where the table is set."

"I want to make it perfect Sabin, and perfect isn't with the table at the center of the room as if it were any other day, is it?"

He chuckled at her short tone and gave her an aye-aye before asking if there was anything else she needed. "Yes, I need the security moved to the other wings surrounding this hall, so she can move safely about without security being sacrificed. Would you perhaps handle that for me?"

"Certainly. I'll see to it now." he departed quickly. As soon as he was gone, Terra went about setting up the table as swiftly as she could. The dishes were trickier to set up. Her panic kept her from doing it right, but eventually she it up set and had the food rolling out on a cart.

Cadence arrived shortly after to help with some of the decorations for the hall, and together they strung them up. Luckily for them Sabin came back in time to help reach the places out of reach. They were obnoxious little lights that Edgar had designed years and years ago, and Sabin didn't like having to deal with the twisty cords, but eventually he got them set up. After Terra's constant directional change demands.

"It is fine there, Terra," Celes said as she finally arrived, carrying a rather large box in her arms. Locke was her side, carrying smaller trays, presumably food, if they followed the requests. Terra smiled and rushed over to help set aside her box to hug her. "Gods Terra, no need to worry yourself, it will go well."

"I hope so," she whispered.

"Listen to her, she knows her stuff," Locke said with a smile. "We brought over the food, hopefully it is enough. I made as much of this as I dared." he made a disgruntled face as he sat the things down. Terra giggled. She had asked him to make various mushroom foods, from stews to rolls, and it was difficult for him. He hated them so much, and yet he was such a good cook that Terra had to ask. There was so much she had to do short notice. In the end, he had agreed to it for Emma when he learned it was her favorite.

"She will love it, thank you Locke." she hugged him and kissed his cheek. "Where is Jacen?"

"About that," Celes said, crossing her arms. "Terra, as much as we appreciate the invitation, this is a special day, and one meant for family. And I'm sure Emma will not feel up to being surrounded by so many people."

"You aren't just people," she said. "You are family."

"No," Locke reached out to touch her shoulder. "Terra, she's right. We shouldn't be here today. You told us the other day how she can be unpredictable around others, or in unknown situations. It would be for the best if we weren't here to test what she can handle when you are trying to give her a day of comfort."

Terra looked at them for a moment before relenting. "You're right...I just...I just thought maybe she would like more company, but I shouldn't push more on her than she can take. Not right now."

Cadence looked uncomfortable about something before offering a small smile for the queen. "If the day goes well Terra, perhaps it will bode well for the future. Do not give up hope." she looked about. "Is everything ready? Shall I get her?" Terra sent her off and gave her goodbyes to Celes and Locke.

Sabin noticed her wringing her hands together and laughed. "It is no wonder your daughter is such a nervous little one all of the time," he rested his arm over her shoulders and guided her to a chair. "You need to breathe Terra. Benjamin is aware of the day and has freely declined invitation. Everything will go according to plan."

"What if I say something to upset her?" she mumbled. "Oh Sabin...when I was first pregnant with Cambyses it was the greatest joy I had ever received. To have a child...it is a gift that cannot be explained. And then I got my sweet little Benjamin and the years went on, and I saw you with yours. And my heart yearned. I know it...it was cruel of me to look at my sons and hope for a daughter next, but I couldn't help it. I want the bond that Edgar had with the boys, that so many other mothers had with their daughters."

"Terra, Terra," he pressed her into a hug. "That is perfectly natural. It doesn't mean you love your sons less."

"I failed her though," she said. "I let the prejudices of the world force my hand, and she was without the comforts a child should have. What if that bond cannot be saved? What if I have lost her forever?"

Sabin started to laugh. "Is that what you fear? That Emma holds no love for you?" she looked away from him, tears in her eyes. "Let me tell you, there's no other child in this world that loves her parents more than that girl loves you and Edgar. It is really quite something. Do not mistake this chaos for years of disdain, Terra. Think of the nights where she crawled into your bed in Thamasa because of nightmares, of the days she'd throw a fit so she could skip her education to be with you and Edgar. And you know how much that girl loves her education." Terra giggled at that and wiped at her eyes. "Or heavens, of the tall tales she told to convince you and Edgar to set aside your duties to spend the day with her. She may not remember it all, gods only know their plan for her ailments, but she remembers a deal of it. In her heart blossoms only love. There is no hate in her."

"I love her so very much," Terra whispered as she dried her eyes.

Sabin laughed. "That is obvious, the way you two have doted on her so thoroughly. Now, what do you say we rise and greet the princess of Figaro with smiles and hugs, hm?"

••••••••••••

Emma woke dreading the solstice. Cadence had insinuated much with her departing words two days ago, but Emma knew what she had really meant. Today was going to be a tough day indeed. Emma groaned tiredly and pressed her pillow against her face to escape the creeping light from the windows.

In the shadows of her mind she could hear her voice whispering but she tried her best to ignore it and push herself through her daily routine. It helped her to center herself and quiet the voice if only by a bit. By the time she settled back comfortably on her bed and began The Swan, it was already late in the morning and she could faintly smell the evening breads cooking for the solstice.

It does smell delicious, she thought, considering attending after all.

Who would welcome you? her voice challenged. There is nothing. There is no one out there for you for you. This is our safe place. Stay.

Emma stared down at the current page, feeling tears swell. Maybe...maybe I could just be with Cadence and...and mother...

They do not care for you, the voice whispered. Have I not shown you this? Must I show you more before you understand? Before you trust me?

Emma closed her eyes and willed the voice away. Leave me be! I won't listen to you...not today. Not now.

The voice relented on its own though, departing with a warning. So be it, but you will see the truth soon enough. Then the voice was gone, leaving her to her thoughts once more. Angrily, Emma slapped the book shut and dropped to her back onto the bed with sudden thoughts—wishes—to see and spend the day with Alexander. Her heart fluttered at the idea of just talking with him, of sharing his company even for a few minutes.

Cadence's words rang through her mind then, to find the courage to tell him how she felt, but Emma knew that sort of strength was too difficult for her to find. What would I even say to him? The words seemed impossible to string together even in her mind, but yet she wanted to try so terribly that it hurt when she thought about it. She wanted to be honest with him, but how to start? And then she pictured him laughing at her confession and covered her face. I can't! He will laugh, he will turn me away...he will never speak with me again.

"Emma, are you awake yet?"

Cadence's voice helped to distract her from her thoughts. Emma sat up and hurried over to answer the door. It was going exactly as Emma knew it would. She's going to want me to go to the solstice celebration, she thought as she greeted the young woman. "Good morning, Cadence." she could do little about the exhaustion in her tone.

Noticing it, Cadence walked in and guided her back in by taking her arm. "Is something the matter Emma? Did you not sleep well last night?"

"I slept fine," she mumbled, taking her arm back. "Why are you here Cadence?"

She laughed. "Good. I thought we were going to have to dodge around the subject first," she looked around, noticing that the room was oddly disorganized. Clothes were thrown around the room and there was a stack of books beside the bed, clearly having already been read. The bed hadn't even been made yet. "First...are you sure nothing is wrong?"

Emma looked at her strangely. "Why do you ask?"

Cadence looked around the room once more before leaving it as is. "Forget it...I just wanted to see you and ask you to come with me?" Emma knew where she was going with it, but asked where to. Cadence laughed. "To the solstice celebration, of course."

"M-maybe I should just stay and—"

"Please Emma? I know the other day we talked about this, but remember I made you a promise? I've been working on this since and I promise it will be different than what you expect. Please give it a chance."

Emma thought it over carefully. "Ben?"

She smiled. "No Benjamin. It will only be your mother, your uncle, you and I."

Don't, the voice warned. Don't!

Emma took a breath. "Okay...okay I'll g-go."

Cadence squealed happily and took the girl into a tight hug. "Thank you Emma! You will love it, I'm sure of it! Is there anything you need help with before we leave?"

"No, I'm fine." she said quickly.

And for a moment Cadence considered that to be true, but then she looked her over. Emma was dressed in a disheveled shirt and baggy shorts—clearly she had napped in them. Her hair had been hastily brought up into a ponytail and was still wet from the bath she had taken earlier.

"Let's just...revisit that, hm?" and before Emma could shoo her away, the woman was fussing over her appearance.

"B-but Cadence, I'm fine in this."

"Oh no you aren't," she said, tearing the girl out of her shirt. Emma nearly stumbled backward into the bed. She giggled at Emma when the girl glared at her. "Come now, you know this simply won't do. These are lounging clothes, after all. Here, let me get you something more fitting." she tossed the shirt into a bit in the corner of the room and then went to the chest at the end of the bed to look for something. Displeased with her findings, she went to the dressers. "You know, for a princess, you do not have as much attire as one would think you would."

Emma had covered herself with a blanket, equally embarrassed at her exposure as she was cold. "I...I have enough." It was a lie. The girl barely had anything. Cadence knew the girl just simply didn't ask for things unless she felt she needed to.

"Well, I will remedy that later," she promised as she took out a long skirt and matching blouse. The blouse was like ivory, and laced around collar bone. The skirt was a dark red shade, and pleated. "This will do lovely." she handed over the attire. Emma began to dress as the woman went back to look for something for her in case she got chilly. "Now the celebration's activities won't begin until later in the day, but I just know you will love them. However if you do not not feel up to them when it comes around that time, you just let your mother and I know, alright?"

"Okay," came Emma's meek response, just as she finished dressing. "Cadence? May...may I ask you s-something?"

"Of course."

"If...if I wanted to someone there...could I i-invite them?"

Cadence knew exactly where this was going, exactly whom the girl was referring to, and what sort of disaster would ensue if the man in question actually said yes. She is going to ask about Alexander, she realized. Although the young man seemed to ground her, help her in so many ways, it was not appropriate to have him attend, especially given the circumstances involving the emotions of the princess and the lack thereof of Alexander. It would be a good anchor for her though...but we can't risk his presence here. Not today.

"And who did you have in mind, Emma? Alexander?"

The girl's cheeks went pink and she looked away. "Well...I mean...if he wanted to."

And so Cadence was right, though there was really no question. She needed to convince the poor girl it couldn't be tried. "Emma, this is a celebratory event. Families will be with families, so I think he will be attending the evening with his own today."

The pure disappointment that swept across her face upon the realization was evident, and strong enough that even Cadence could feel it. Why does she have to feel everything so strongly? Cadence thought, feeling so much pity.

"Oh, right," she mumbled. "W-well after then..."

"Maybe," Cadence through a tight smile, wishing very so to tell the poor girl the truth but knowing it would utterly crush her. "Now, let's get going. I'm sure your mother is worried about us."

••••••••••••

The halls were emptied for them, rather for her she supposed, and she felt her raw nerves beginning to settle some. Of course she could trust Cadence and her mother in this. Why shouldn't she? I was being unreasonable... she thought as they descended the stairs to the first floor.

As soon as they had passed under the archway into the lower hall, Emma's eyes widen. She was awestruck. The roof was littered in crisscrossing lights, and draping down the walls was garland and glass orbs of various sizes and shapes that reflected the light from above. The floor was sprinkled with gold and red dust. At the end of the hall, the door to the great hall was decorated with a giant band of the gods, twisted together with ribbons of gold and blue and various flowers.

"We're almost there," Cadence said, smiling, as she continued to guide Emma forward and through the doors. When she pushed the doors open, the wondrous smells wafted toward her immediately, but it wasn't the smells that distracted her—any other day it would have—it was the state of the great hall. Every single candle in the room had been lit, and just like in the hall outside, the roof had been strung up with lights and hanging garland. Tendrils of tinsel fell here and there, with rings of flower and acorn tied securely around them. The walls had been furnished with all sorts of prayer bands, festive or not, and occupied by festive paintings and orbs.

The tables had been laid at the center of the room with large, red sheets, sprinkled with the same dust, and topped with all sorts of foods. At the end of the room sat a music box, currently playing a soft tune from Jidoor.

Emma's eyes misted with tears and she pulled out of Cadence's hold. The woman paused, knowing, just as Terra entered the hall from the kitchen carrying a tray of sweet bread. Emma looked at Cadence and then her mother, who sat the bread down. "You...you did this f-f-for me?"

Terra approached to take her hands. "I would do anything for you Emma if it would make you happy." Emma took her into a hug and cried. Terra held her tightly. "Oh everything will be well my dear girl, you will see. Come see what we set up for you. Your uncle went out to the seaholds and brought back all your favorite fish, and you wouldn't believe what Cadence convinced her father to do."

"That's right," Cadence giggled. "It took some strong arming, but he caved." she gestured to the trays and bowls on the tables. "My father, as you may or may not know, is actually a very talented chef. I asked him to prepare some dishes for the evening for us, since it wouldn't be right to ask the staff to stay today. He resisted at first because of what we asked, but," Cadence leaned over to take the top off of a bowl and Emma leaned away from her mother to look. Inside the bowl was a delicious looking stew of mushroom, meat and vegetable. "There are others, of course, but we were sure to be insistent that mushroom and meat were prominent on the menu."

Emma rubbed at her eyes and said, "It s-s-smells wonderful."

"Sit, sit," her mother said, pulling a chair out. "Your uncle should be here any moment. I'll go get the drinks." before she left, she kissed her daughter's cheek. When they were alone, Cadence sat with an exhausted sigh.

"We worked quickly for this," she leaned into her chair. "My feet are killing me." she giggled at that.

Emma looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry...you didn't have to."

"We wanted to," she said, smiling. "We love you Emma, more than you will ever know."

The doors burst open then and Sabin came in, puffing a bit. "I'm late, sorry, sorry!" he saw Emma then and gave a wide smile before hurrying over to engulf her in a hug. She squirmed a bit. "My little doe! The mouse of Figaro! My little lioness! I'm so glad you decided to attend with us!"

"Uncle, I can't breathe," she mumbled against his chest, and he sheepishly let her go.

"Sorry," he chuckled. "I'm just so excited you're here."

Emma wondered then just how she had been making the others feel since her attack. Had she been selfish to refuse their company, their pleasantries and attempts? Should she have pushed aside her own fears to try at their attempts? The thoughts made her voice echo angrily in her mind, but it did not stir beyond it. Emma could feel its rising annoyance though.

"Here we are," her mother came back into the room, smiling. "Let us start. Oh, Cadence dear, could you move that over so Emma may reach it from her chair? Thank you dear." Cadence had moved over a bowl of cranberries. Emma could have reached that herself, but she didn't say anything. She wanted it to go well, not just for herself—and starting a scene wouldn't do—but for her mother too. If they felt better helping her do mundane tasks, she would let them.

"Does that m-mean there is t-turkey?"

Terra was about to speak, but Sabin's chuckle cut her off. "There sure is! I wrangled us the best one, little mouse! Your mother cooked it to perfection, too! So moist and juicy!" he looked like he was drooling already. Emma giggled.

"I cooked it the way you liked it, from back at Thamasa," her mother said softly, taking a seat beside her. Cadence seated herself across from them. Sabin was at the end to her right. "I hope it is to your liking."

Emma said, "Y-your food is always g-good, mother."

Terra's eyes misted gently with tears and she reached over to touch her daughter's hand. "I am just glad I can make you happy, dear."

"Alright, alright," her uncle said, reaching over for a turkey leg. "Let's eat already, I'm starved!" Terra gave him a look that very clearly said, that was clear in its meaning, before agreeing to start the supper. She laid a good portion of turkey meat on her daughter's plate, a warm, buttery biscuit, peas and carrots, potatoes and stuffing.

Emma hadn't seen such fine food since her last solstice back in Thamasa. Since arriving in Figaro, the days had been swamped, and though the castle had celebrated around the royal family, they had been too busy. Her father had been dealing with the Veldt contracts and renewing the peace treaties, and her mother had been dealing with the army and populace in his stead. Her brothers were sent in training under delegates, so there had been nothing to do but roam the castle during the solstice.

Of course, she had understood. Her parents were busy, with things that outweighed a silly solstice celebration, so she did not complain, she did not feel left out of anything. She was just glad to be around them. Now though...now she had wished she had that with them. The desire she had harbored so desperately back in Thamasa had begun to root itself back in her, despite the anger she held so tightly for her father that seemed to wain every day.

Around her the conversations grew from small talk to more lively ones, and Emma found herself listening to them with halfhearted attention. A part of her didn't know how to put herself into the conversation, and another piece didn't know what to say to what they were talking about. She felt useless and small. But seeing her mother, and her uncle, and Cadence, made all that worth it.

••••••••••••

Benjamin knew he was being difficult to his mother, to push her feelings aside today of all days while she suffered the unknown for her son and husband, but he could not help what he felt. If he had to look at Emma while he knew everything that had happened was her fault, that it could have been avoided had she just learned to accept their father's decisions, he would not be able to contain his anger.

The rage that burned his heart was hard to believe to have spawned from pity from the night she had been raped, from when he had seen her lying helplessly on that table, beaten like some disobedient dog. When the war had been announced, when he had been turned aside, forgotten, he realized where it all had begun. The anger he had felt then, for her, was so deep it had made him think dark thoughts. He had wanted people to burn. Now he wanted his sister to leave, to return to Thamasa, to never taint his sight again, and the anger that dwelled deep in his heart fed off of the continued delay of her departure.

It is no matter, he thought as he stared out his window into the court yard where festive lights burned brightly against the darkening stone walls and dying growth. Soon enough even mother will know I am right and send her away...they will understand it is the best for us all, even for her. He turned away from the window and went to his dresser, where a line of trophies he had earned from his days in the academy laid in a clean line. Above sat a portrait of the family, missing his sister. He reached out for one of the swordsmanship trophies and didn't realize he was crying until a sob had taken him.

What would he do if his brother was taken from him? His father? Everything he was was thanks to his brother and father, and everything he wanted to be was because of his brother and father. With a shout he threw his hand through the line of trophies, throwing them to the ground with a loud crash. Damn her! He thought, dropping to his knees. He picked up one of the trophies and started into the gold plate where his name had been chiseled and the year he had won it.

His father and mother had cheered for him so strongly, had been so proud, and it was because he had such a good brother to teach him. He couldn't imagine going forward without him, without his father, to be there always, to protect and teach him as they always have. Why couldn't she have just listened? He thought, collecting the trophies as the pain drifted away to a dullness. Why did she have to get everything she ever wanted... He put the trophies back up, lazily, and rubbed the tears from his eyes stubbornly.

He needed to take his mind off of it all, or he would lose his temper again. He took a breath, to take control of the last vestige of anger in him, and collected his sword from the rack on the wall and left his room. He made his way to the sparring room in the northern wing, commissioned several years ago for the princes to use during the harshest of Figaro's seasons, and found that four soldiers were currently using the space. One of them was an officer, and although Benjamin did not know his name, he knew the man served under Hals.

At his approach, the officer noticed him and made a bow. "Your highness, we were not expecting you." the others finally stopped their practice to follow suit. "Shouldn't you be with your family this evening?" a little piece of Ben's anger flared, but he shook his head.

"No, the day is for children. I will leave it to my sister to be pampered as such."

The officer looked at the men briefly. "I see." he cleared his throat. "Would you like to join us, your highness? We are no knights, but our sword arm isn't so lame we can't offer a good session our prince." Benjamin had wanted to be alone, so he declined them politely. Thankfully they took it well. It seemed they would rather spend the day without the pressure of a prince around anyhow, and Benjamin understood that perfectly. He always felt the crown was uncomfortable in situations like this. "Understood, your highness. Is there anything we can do for you then?"

Well, if I cannot use the sparring room, I will see if Hals has anything to keep me busy, he thought. "Yes, there is. Do you know where I might find Hals?"

The officer nodded. "Of course. He's currently in the war room going over supply requests from the south and Roskovo, your highness." Benjamin thanked him and turned to make his way out of the room.

The walk to the war room was quiet, and he had found it ample time to think more on what he could do in the absence of his father and brother, anything to make them proud and to help their nation. Somehow he kept hearing his father chiding him though for disrespect, and Cambyses telling him he had done too much damage to ever make up for it. And he knew why. His sister. He swore under his breath and dispelled the thoughts. No. I will not be swayed. I know what they refuse to see, that she is a disaster for us, be it intentional or not.

When he finally arrived at the war room, he took a moment outside the door to collect himself, and then entered. Hals was at the table going through documents and when he noticed the prince, he covered them and straightened. "Your highness...I wasn't expecting you." he adjusted himself. "Is there something you require?"

"I am here to see if you need any assistance," he said, glancing about. "I know that most of the staff and the military is either preoccupied with other duties or with family for the festival, so I thought perhaps I could lend a hand."

Hals shook his head. "That is considerate of you, my prince, but I have things well in hand. Mayhaps you could visit your mother and sister?"

"I'd rather eat nails," he grumbled under his breath.

"What was that?" Hals asked as he went back to the documents, still not really listening. Benjamin rolled his eyes. Now he was starting to understand why Emma really didn't like Hals' company—and that was saying something. It took a lot for his spoiled, goody-goody of a sister to dislike being around someone. "I'm sorry, but I am very busy here. Could you find someone else to help?"

Benjamin felt a nerve pinch. It was becoming even more obvious why his sister didn't like being around him the more he talked. How had it been so obscure in all his life? Well, he supposed he rarely hung around Hals, especially alone. And what is he reading that is so important he can be short with me? He glanced at the documents quickly. "And why aren't you with any family this festival, Hals?"

The old man looked up at him, with a frown, and leaned away from the table. It was clear from the expression on his face that he was upset. "I haven't a family of my own...your highness." he stressed the that, and Benjamin knew he snapped a nerve. "And to be frank, it is quite rude of you to bring it up when I know you recall it."

Benjamin said, "I meant no disrespect Hals, it was merely a question."

"I'm sure," he said, tone hot. "You are as disrespectful as you are cruel to your sister these days." and that was it. Benjamin would not let him continue without knowing where the lines were between them.

"You forget your place, Hals," he snapped. "I am your prince!"

"These days I question it," he said sternly. "Now if you are through distracting me, I must get back to the task your mother the queen put me to." he went to sorting the documents without waiting for a reply. Benjamin's anger swelled and then burst. He charged forward and slung an arm through the clean stack of documents Hals had already sorted, sending them flying towards the floor. Hals simply looked at him. "Did that make you feel better, my prince?"

"Shut up!"

"No?" he knelt to start collecting the loose papers. "There is more of it on the table, should you feel another attempt might change the outcome."

Benjamin's anger was sizzling. "You don't understand a thing!"

"Perhaps not," he admitted, standing, documents in hand. "I suppose there isn't ground to argue with my prince." Hals sat the documents on the table and adjusted himself to face the prince. "Your guilt will eat you alive though, my prince. You must let it go. For your own good."

"My guilt?" he snarled. "What should I feel guilty for?"

"For how you have treated your sister," he said softly. "You have pinned your torment and your fear on her, even though you know deep down it is wrong to do so, and yet you strike her every time you see her, you spit your venom and you make her feel less than and you make her cry. And for such vicious things out of her control, for things unspeakable done to her. The duty of a man, of a brother, is that of a protector, and you have failed the moment she survived her assault."

"I don't care," he snapped. "It was of her own doing. If she were less spoiled, if she listened to the decisions of her parents without crying and stomping her feet, it wouldn't have happened in the first place. And now because of her, look where we stand as a nation. My brother and father fight a war because of her and you stand here...pushing papers."

Hals sighed. "You would call your sister spoiled?"

"She is," he insisted. "Since the day she arrived in Figaro she has only ever been given everything, when asked or not. It soured an already distasteful behavior. Even father has said she is spoiled."

"Your father is a traditionalist when it comes to parenting, Benjamin," he said. "He always has been, but the truth of the matter is, he regards you and your brother as spoiled, not your sister." that made Ben's eyes widened.

"Do not put words in my father's mouth, such lies!"

"When he returns, feel free to ask him," Hals knelt to retrieve more papers. "I have worked for your father for twenty years, my prince, and before that I had served in the army under General Diyozan who had served your grandfather his entire career. Suffice to say I know your father and his opinions well enough, perhaps not as well as his closest advisor Suon, but well enough."

"Then why would he always say she is spoiled if he never thought it?"

"Are you so oblivious you cannot see the answer?" he asked, pausing his task. "Your sister is peculiar, and you know all the reasons why." he was unsettled by that. "Her focus is like an iron will when she sets it on something, but when she doesn't it is like trying to force a river to flow up stream. Your father is harder on your sister because she's different in a world that doesn't accept it. She's defiant and willful, intelligent and curious, trusting and yet always at odds with everyone around her, always lonely. All of this in a girl, no less, an even stranger and less desirable thing in today's world. Had she been more a male, it would be different. Your father only calls her spoiled because she's rarely at heel to him for her own benefit and because your mother tries her hardest to give her the things she was never granted that you were when you were her age, not because she's pampered like some yammering witless child who can only be controlled when she's granted something she desires."

"Nonsense," he snapped. "You can't twist the meaning of the word to hide what she is. All she has ever done is run around and scream for what she has wanted, and my parents have silenced her by giving in."

Hals finished retrieving the last of the papers and sat them on the table. "If that is how you see it, then tell me...what has she been granted that marks her as such?" Benjamin stammered. "Go on. A life of such spoiling should make it easy for you to mark even a few things, shouldn't it?"

"It's...it's small things, I couldn't keep track!"

"No, now that is nonsense," he said sternly, crossing his arms.

"Since she's arrived here she's been treated that way. You expect me to keep track of every moment she's been pampered?"

"Clearly you have paid it dear attention, so yes I do," he shook his head. "Let me ask you though who is the real spoiled party here; you and your brother, or your sister?" Benjamin could only glare back at him, feeling uneasy at what he was getting at, afraid for some reason he couldn't pin down. A part of him wanted to just leave, but something was keeping him in the room.

Hals spoke after a moment, in a soft tone. "There's no need to let it consume you."

"Let what consume me?" he demanded. "You make less sense the more you talk!"

"Your guilt," Hals said quietly. "You call your sister such heinous things, insist she has been showered with undivided attention and gifts since her birth to her arrival in Figaro, and yet I have seen no evidence to support your assertion or that it would even be the crime you try to make it out to be. I only see guilt in you and your words, and a need to justify your anger and pain, which you direct at an innocent girl so that you have someone to blame for some relief."

"You do nothing but babble, old man!"

"Let me start then by pointing out the clear difference between the three royal children," he spoke over him, loudly, now sounding angry. Benjamin was too shocked to interrupt him. "I have seen in my time here two princes born healthy to the king and queen have the luxury to be raised by their own parents, recognized and celebrated by people of their home nation, to be accepted into a prestigious academy and taught by the world's finest, to make acquaintances and good friends out of them, to spend name days and all holy days of their lives with their family and loved ones, to know no difficulty beyond how they might impress a woman or their parents with their latest feats."

Benjamin stammered out a, "You can't fault us because we were healthy and—"

"In contrast, I witnessed the first daughter born to Figaro in three generations born sickly and strange," he shook his head and Benjamin saw pity in his eyes. "A forgotten princess of Figaro, reared by foreign monarchs across the Sapphire sea because of an illness and peculiarity that we both know no nation would tolerate. This child who has never had a mother or father greet her in the mornings or soothe her when she woke frightened from a nightmare when she was growing up as you two had, forced to attend an academy selected by the very council who detested her at birth as they had detested her mother, where she found neither comfort or friends, only torment and ridicule, like all the other unfortunate children attending there. A child who went name days and holy days wishing not for toys but for her mother and father to be able to stay with her but given letters telling her the crown bid them to stay where they were. And in her letters, did you ever hear your parents read out any anger from your sister? Annoyance? Demands? There was only ever hope for the next time, until there wasn't anything at all from your sister. All while she kept losing pieces of the one thing that no one should ever lose—her memories."

"So let me tell you what I think," he voice had risen even higher and Benjamin could tell his anger was not something to poke any further less it explode. "I think you know her life has been unfair, unfair even before her rape." Benjamin grimaced at that word. "Does that word hurt you to hear, my prince? A shame then, because that is what happened to your sister. Your sister was deceived and then led away from her security detail where she was violently beaten and raped."

"Enough!" Benjamin demanded, feeling sick.

"No, I don't think it is," he continued. "She survived that horrendous ordeal only to find out that her brother regards her with aversion. To know that her father cannot face her and she doesn't even understand why? To know that her eldest brother won't even look her in the eyes from guilt, something even the most oblivious soldier knows now? That her mother overcompensates for the terrible behavior of her other children she's splitting herself into negligence to avoid looking as if she's picking favorites? Can you imagine what that might feel for that poor girl, my prince, to feel as if she has no one left in the world she can turn to, to talk to?" he waited a moment, watching as the prince looked away, and scoffed. "No. I imagine you cannot. After all...she's spoiled."

At once Benjamin had recalled the first memory he had of his sister back at Thamasa, when she was introduced to them officially. She had sent several letters when she could after she learned of them—and Benjamin had never known a six year old's letter could sound like they were written by an adult, minus the childish handwriting—and was so ecstatic when she saw them she ran over to them and hugged them as tightly as she could. They had repaid that immediate affection with a trick over their names that played on her speech impediment. One she felt so shy and embarrassed over she had yet to get over.

Benjamin realized just how far she kept pushing the limits of her affections just for them, over and over again, without hesitation, and felt his chest tighten. Gods, the tears built in his eyes. What...what have I done?

It was if a wall had come down. He stumbled to his knees, tears falling. It was if all the energy in him had been whisked from him all at once. There was nothing left in him but pain and guilt and regret, and fear of the future. There were so many things he had wanted to say—to Hals, to his father and mother, to Cambyses, but most importantly to his sister, but they were scrambled up in his head and he didn't know how to say it, when to, or if he even had the right to after all the pain he had caused.

Hals approached and laid a hand on his shoulder. "It will be alright, Benjamin. A man will always make mistakes, but few of them will acknowledge them and seek to set them straight. You know she will always love you, you need only ask for her forgiveness."

"I don't deserve it," he sobbed. "I don't deserve anything but misery."

"Let your sister be the one to decide that," he lifted the prince to his feet. "Come...you know where she is."

••••••••••••

There was a great comfort in listening to the excited chatter of those around her. It brought her back to when things weren't so chaotic, so confusing, when her biggest issue was trying to figure out why her brothers teased her so much. It was almost...perfect. Forgetting everything else. Except her cousins weren't here, and she wasn't completely sure why her uncle side of the family had declined attending the day with them. She had a feeling they were trying to avoid upsetting her. She knew they meant good and the fact that she found it helpful made her a little guilty, because they should be able to spend the day with their father.

She had stopped eating, which slowly caught the attention of the others. Her mother looked worried when she asked what was wrong. Emma looked down at her hands, resting on her lap. "Why...why aren't you w-with your f-family uncle?"

There was no hesitation to his answer. "I talked to them about it, and they agreed that you needed me more today." she started to cry. "We love you Emma and we only want what's best for you."

I have taken their father away from them. I've been so selfish...

No, her voice said. You have only ever acted to protect us from such dangers. The world means us harm! Go back to our room, where we are safe! Before it is too late!

Enough, she snapped back at her voice. You may be right about the world...but you will never be right about my family!

The voice snarled. Then just you wait. The day will come when you taste your happiness turn to poison in your mouth. And just like that, the voice had left her.

Emma found some courage to look up at her uncle for a split second before glancing away. "Uncle?" he hmm'd. "I k-know we already started, but...may w-we ask them t-to come to dinner?"

Terra's look of surprise quickly turned to that of happiness. "That sounds like a splendid idea, but are you sure Emma? Sabin and his family will not mind if you are uncomfortable around so many people—"

Emma took a deep breath. "They...they are family." Sabin smirked at that. "Family would never hurt family."

Her uncle got up. "Then I'll hurry along and get them." he came over to Emma to give her a tiny hug. "Your cousins will be so excited. They've missed you something fierce."

Cadence laughed. "Well hurry along then Sabin before everything runs cold and we've no supper to eat." the man laughed before he hurried off to the door. When he opened it, there stood Benjamin, hand up, ready to knock. There came a sweeping silence throughout the room for a flat second, but Terra scooted her chair back, creating a loud screeching noise, and stood with a frightfully angry look on her face.

Emma saw him and stumbled up to her feet when her uncle stepped out of the way to let her brother into the great hall. The look on her brother's face was not discernible, and that worried her more than the anger that usually clouded it as of late. Cadence got up, defensively, even as Terra went around the table.

"I thought we came to an understanding, Ben. You need to leave."

Benjamin looked at his mother for a moment before turning his eyes to Emma. She couldn't hold his gaze. The overwhelming guilt of all the pain she had caused him was too much. "I...I just need to talk with you all for a moment, then I will leave, I promise."

Sabin shook his head and laid a hand on his nephew's shoulder. "I'm sorry, but you need to go."

"Please, if I could just have a moment, I'm trying to say that I'm—" he was cut off as a soldier came charging into the room, out of breath. Emma gasped and scrambled out of view behind her mother.

"Your majesty! Urgent news from Roskovo!" Sabin tried to reach the lad in time to stop him from continuing, but it was too late. Catching onto the tone, and the angry glares of his monarch, the lad froze clamped his mouth shut. Benjamin turned around to look at him, completely distracted now. "I...I will come back later."

"No," Benjamin said, sounding as angry as he looked frightened. "What news?"

Terra said, "It is for my ears only Benjamin, for now you must go."

"I won't go until I hear what he has to say," he said loudly, though not rudely. "I have every right to know." their mother's face grew a shade of red that Emma had never seen before.

"Benjamin Cornelius Figaro, you will leave drop it this instant and leave this room now!" Emma knew by the way her mother was deflecting her son from the soldier that was something was wrong. He refused to move. "I said now!"

Emma said it before she could really think on it. "What...what happened in Roskovo?" her voice was barely over a whisper, so it wouldn't have been surprise if they hadn't of heard her, but when her mother and Cadence looked at her, with worried expressions, Emma knew. It wasn't good, whatever it was.

"It is nothing Emma," her mother said, turning to take her daughter's face in her hands. "Let me handle this, please."

"Tell us what happened!" Benjamin shouted. "You can't hide it from us, it is wrong!" he was crying now. "If you do not tell me, I will look for the answers myself and tell her as well!" Terra faced him, her fury and disappointment evident in the stare she gave him. "You give me no choice," he said, letting his tears fall. "Tell us."

Cadence looked to Terra. "I'll take Emma to her room."

Terra stopped her. "No," she said. "She needs to hear it too. Regardless, it will be told to her whether I want her to hear it now or not." she took her daughter's hands and it was then that Emma saw tears in her eyes. "Listen to me...no matter how hard it is to hear what I am about to tell you and your brother, you need to know that everything will be okay. Your father and I will figure it all out."

Frightened, Emma let her mother's hands go. She was finding it extremely difficult to breathe. Her heart was racing so fast it hurt. A thrumming began in her ears. Benjamin was staring, waiting. "We received word several days ago that...that your brother has been captured by Roskovian soldiers." the ringing grew louder and Emma tried desperately to concentrate on her mother's mouth, to hear the words being said. "They have been refusing hostage negotiations but it confirms they need him alive so—" Benjamin ran out of the room then. Sabin hurried after him.

The voice was right. Her happiness, so short lived and sweet, now tasted like poison. The pain in her chest felt like a fire and her ears were aching from the pounding. The room felt like it was spinning and getting smaller and smaller around her. She wasn't even aware that her mother had stopped talking to grab her by the face and ask her something—something she couldn't hear. Away, she thought, I want to go away, please, please, please.

The voice whispered into her mind, let me take you away then.

And as quick as the pain had come, she had crumbled into her mother's arms, unconscious.

When Emma came to, her head was pounding fiercely, and she was in her room. The curtains were drawn almost completely closed, leaving most of the light source to a flicking candle across the room. Her thoughts were foggy at first but as clarity reached her and her memories drifted back to her eldest brother, her grief had come back to her tenfold. Her tears had come slowly at first but the reality of who had captured her brother had set in quickly, and her tears had turned into painful sobs. Benjamin was right. This was all her fault, and now their brother was paying the price for her actions.

What do I do? What do I do? she begged her voice, the gods, anyone. I don't want to lose him. The door to her room opened and her mother came in. Her mother noticed her away and hurried over. "Emma, my sweet girl, oh please, everything will be alright, I promise." she sat on the bed and took her daughter into a hug. Emma couldn't control her grief any longer, and in her mother's arms, feeling safe, the tears had broken free completely. "Your father will save him Emma, he will. Trust him."

"He w-wouldn't be t-there if it wasn't for me," she cried.

Terra pressed her against herself tighter. "No, none of this will ever be your fault. Roskovo was determined to go to war with us Emma, always, you mustn't put this on yourself. Your brother wouldn't want you to."

Emma knew her mother would never admit the truth, but Benjamin had said it enough for it to stick. Emma knew that Benjamin's fury would be worse following this revelation, unbearable, painful. She couldn't even think about being around it, even should she deserve the wrath.

"Ben will n-never forgive me now," she cried. Her mother held her tighter. The uselessness and guilt was too much, and she could do nothing more than cry.

For our sake, the voice said, I will handle him the way we should have from the start.

Emma tried to fight the voice back. No! I don't care what he does or says, I will never hurt him!

That is precisely the problem, the voice was pressing her control from all sides. And that is why I will do what I must. And with a sharp pain, Emma's vision went black.

••••••••••••

When Cadence had left Terra with her daughter, she was left with the unknown. She knew the news of Cambyses was going to devastate the girl—she looked up to her brothers so much—and now she was afraid Emma was going to reverse whatever progress she had made. Terra had little to say on what happened. She was angry, Cadence knew, with herself for keeping it a secret despite her own judgement and with her son for barging in and making a scene despite knowing his sister's sensitivities, and it only made the situation even worse.

Not knowing what to do, and feeling as if trying to talk to Emma right now would be an intrusion between family, Celes had retreated to her family's quarters. Her mother was busy going over naval adjustments on several plans Hals had left her, and her father was going over a few maps, correcting it. He had become something of a cartographer in his years, and the king had relied on him for it. So far her father was annoyed with whoever had drawn up the initial maps and spent hours trying to discern what it meant to redo it. Her brother was nowhere to be seen. They had their heads as far away from the festival celebrations as anyone could.

Her mother noticed her but didn't look up. "Cadence, how did it go?"

Cadence wanted to hide away in her room. On top of everything, of knowing the man she loved was being held captive by savages, she didn't want to deal with how to heal a poor girl who wouldn't have needed it if her brother wasn't such an ass. Her silence was enough of an answer. Locke glanced up. "That bad, eh? Emma not show up?"

"No, that's not it," and by now her tears had started to well up in her eyes. "She...she had finally gotten the courage to leave her room. She...she was happy."

Celes put aside her work. "What happened?" it was clear she was going to go straight over for Terra if need be. Cadence swiped the tears from her eyes.

"Benjamin interrupted us, and...and if that wasn't enough, a soldier came to report to Terra in front of them. Benjamin knew something was wrong and he forced Terra to tell them what was wrong. Emma didn't take it well at all."

Celes was on her feet immediately. "I will go see Terra."

"She's with Emma right now," she said. "And Emma...it looked like she couldn't breathe. It was horrible, mother. I don't think we should interrupt."

"I will not abandon my friend when she is in need," Celes said sternly. "Nor will I abandon her daughter when she is in need."

Locke cut in softly. "I think it is best that we do not in this case, Celes." she looked at him sharply, most shocked to hear that he did not have her side. "Think about it Celes. Terra had made the decision to lie to her daughter and she's trying to deal not only with that decision but her daughter's grief at the realization of what happened to family. Right now what needs to happen is privacy and a chance for Terra to mend whatever she can. When she needs you, she will call for you."

Celes did not argue. She knew the sense in his words. She took her documents and went into their solar, clearly annoyed. Locke sat with a sigh and made a joke about paying for it later, but Cadence wish she could feel something other than the terror and grief in her heart. Split between two people she had grown to love with all her heart.

"What about you kiddo, how are you doing?" her father asked, driving her from her thoughts. She looked at her father and tried to be brave, but it washed away in the light of his comforting presence.

"I miss him," she admitted, and a sob had weakened her voice. "I miss him so much that it hurts...but I can't do anything about it. I can't talk to anyone about it, not to Terra and not to Emma, it would only hurt them."

Locke said, "You get that strength from your mother, certainly not from me." he chuckled softly. "I do not know exactly how you feel, but you must know that you will always have your mother and I, and your brother. And now...a girl who depends on you."

Cadence looked at her father then. "What if I can't help her?"

Locke smirked. "Do you really think that? Cadence, you have done so much for her, for a girl that trusts no one else after her troubles. If you cannot trust in yourself, trust in the fact that Emma has placed her love and trust in you."

Cadence thanked her father with a hug and kissed his cheek. "Thank you father..."

He gave her a half hug. "Anything for my little girl."

Doing as her father had suggested, Cadence had given the Figaro family room. For two days Cadence lingered in their quarters wondering frightfully how it was all going. Locke had come and gone to do his duties, and Celes had continued administrating her duties as commander of the Figaro armed forces. It was on the third day that Celes had announced, after reading a document she didn't like, that she needed to go to the castle and speak with Terra.

Locke argued against it until she gave him a look and told him it was work related above all else. Cadence had never seen her father look the way he had, but after he read the document, he did not argue. Instead he said he would go find Sabin. Cadence didn't know if she could stay behind and wanting to see Emma, she begged her mother if she could go with her. After considering it quietly, her mother agreed to let her come.

When they arrived at the castle, two anxious guards admitted them in. Celes stopped to question them about the queen, but they were unaware of what was happening, only that something was wrong, for the queen was in a sour mood ever since the solstice. They went in search of Terra immediately, and found her in the chapel, praying at the foot of the statue quietly to herself. There wasn't another soul in the chapel, not even a guard.

Celes approached first. "Terra?" she looked up and offered a small smile against an exhausted expression. "What's going on? Where's the queensguard? You know you mustn't leave the perimeter of the castle without them."

Terra sighed and looked at the faceless statue once more before getting to her feet. Even Cadence could see there wasn't much rest in the queen by the way she moved. "I'm safe enough, Celes." there was a tired annoyance to her voice, Cadence thought she heard. "Regardless...there are no enemies in the shadows here for me. They come for my children. They will pay for my sins."

Celes' cool blue eyes narrowed at her. "Terra, I won't hear this from you. Come, we leave this place. I have much to discuss with you."

It took them a few minutes to reach a hall before Terra stopped them. "I have business to attend to Celes. What do you need?"

"I have reports to fill you in on," she said sharply. "And I won't do it here in the hall for anyone to hear. Collect yourself Terra, for gods' sake!" the sharpness in her tone made Terra look at her with a great sadness, but she listened regardless. "I understand that something happened during the solstice Terra, I do, and we will deal with it, but for now we need to get to the solar. Cadence will deal with Emma until we can unite against the issue, do you understand?"

Terra's eyes filled with tears. "And...and if I have already failed?"

Celes took her friend's hand. "Trust me. There is time yet for you to help your daughter, but you must needs listen to me here and now. We have something that presses on us with greater urgency, which could threaten the safety of Figaro. I need you to come with me."

Terra took a deep breath and looked at Cadence, still crying. "Cadence...help her. Please. She's different, angry, and...and...she wants to leave, for Thamasa but she won't even tell me why." Cadence and Celes were surprised to her that. "Worst of all, she won't eat and it has been days, and now she won't..." she stopped herself and quieted for a moment before continuing. The tears were steadily flowing. "Promise me you will help her."

Cadence could tell the queen was terrified, more than she had ever seen her. Whatever Emma was feeling, it convinced Terra it was serious enough to impede the girl's health. Cadence gave her promise. "I will do whatever I have to, Terra. Go, do what you must. I will find you when I am done."

When Celes and Terra were out of sight, Cadence made her way to the princess' wing. As suspected, there weren't any guards patrolling the hall near her door, they were all stationed at the entryways to the wing and looking every bit wary and protective of their princess. Cadence was stopped by a fresh recruit only once, as he was scolded, before she was admitted through.

Outside the princess' room were two carts of untouched food, three days worth of it. It was starting to stink. When Cadence knocked she never received an answer and found that the door wasn't locked. She knew it wasn't like the last time, that if she entered she wouldn't find the girl in the midst of a romantic escapade with a boy she ought not to be, and was horrified that she was wishing for that to be the alternative to the girl just being in that bad of a mood.

Emma was at the end of her bed, furiously trying to get a traveling case to close. The girl's eyes were wild with anger, and darkened with exhaustion and grief. Cadence had never seen it before on the princess, and it terrified her. When the case wouldn't close, Emma began pounding the top with her fists in frustration.

Horrified, Cadence ran over and took Emma by the arms to stop her. "Stop Emma, stop!" yet she kept trying to hit the case. "It's okay...it's okay." but she wouldn't stop, and Cadence found the strength in the girl unreal. "Emma, please! You're hurting yourself!" she wrapped an arm around the girl's waist and pulled her away, and finally Emma stopped, pulled from her fury in an annoyed startle. She yanked free of the woman's grasp and turned to face her, eyes filled to the brim with tears. The girl's hands were red from her tantrum, and her fingers were cut from where she was hitting the lock to the case, yet she paid her injury no attention. It was as if she couldn't feel it. "Gods, look at your hands!" she stole her hands to inspect them, and finally Emma winced at the touch. "Look at what you have done!"

Emma yanked them away and focused her pale eyes on Cadence, eyes now filled with menace. "Why do you care what happens to me?"

That voice, Cadence thought, staring. It didn't sound anything like the girl she had come to love at all. "Why do I care?" she asked. "Because I have come to love you like a sister, Emma, and naturally a sister would hate to see her loved ones in pain. Now you may believe it or not, but that is how I feel and I won't leave here until you stop the nonsense you have put yourself in." that only served to make the girl angrier but as the anger came, it vanished. The angry eyes that had glared were replaced by sorrowful ones so quickly Cadence had trouble trying to keep up with her emotions.

"Nonsense?" she repeated quietly, almost brokenheartedly.

"Yes, nonsense!" she snapped, now annoyed. "You think you are the only one who is feeling hopeless Emma? Alone? Feeling the despair of Cambyses' capture?" Emma's eyes widened. "You aren't. You can seek comfort from that pain with us, you don't have to seclude yourself in here, to feel every prick of this pain alone. You don't have to leave us...you still have people who love you!"

Emma looked into her eyes, at the tears, for a second before looking away. If Cadence didn't know any better, it was as if she was listening to something...

Finally she shook her head slowly. "No. I...I can't stay."

"Why not?" Cadence begged. "Why can't you? I love you Emma, your mother loves you. Isn't that enough?"

"You wouldn't understand," she cried. "No one would."

"Then help me to understand," Cadence said. "I can help." Emma quietly turned away from her. Seeing that it was hopeless to convince the girl to stay, that Benjamin's behavior had solidified the girl's decision, Cadence had only one desire left. "Then please Emma...please take care of yourself. Your mother told me you haven't eaten in days. You know you can't go on like that, you least of all. Please..." and yet the girl did not answer. She wouldn't do it, Cadence knew, there was a pit of darkness in her, a grief she couldn't escape.

And the worse was yet to come, for Cadence had to tell Terra she failed. Frustrated, Cadence ran out of the room, refusing to let the princess see her tears.

••••••••••••

It was an hour or two after noon and Alexander was well into his fifth hour into work. The morning had been tough. Two engines had burst upon ignition, causing a large fire that took hours to put out. Three men had been injured, and two others had to take the day off due to smoke inhalation. Now they were understaffed, and for how long Alexander did not know. It was gnawing at his nerves. His father was already overworked and overworking his staff, though they all knew the importance of the reason why and did not complain, it didn't make it any better. The only benefit to any of it was that the men were being paid handsomely, and while they worked their families were living within castle limits, in style. They never would have afforded such luxury outside of war, when their talents were a uncommon and rarely called upon.

For Alexander the worst of it outside of the work, the exhaustion and the potential injury and being late to see his family, was that it gave him more time during routine checks to think more on the princess. The girl whose smile lit his day, though he wished it hadn't. The last thing he needed was a girl distracting him during work. His father hated that sort of thing, it caused mistakes, and mistakes caused injury or lost of life. Or money.

And Alexander knew that if his friend Robert had been around to learn of any of this, he would never hear the end of it. It was bad enough his brothers were convinced he was love starved. As if. Him, love starved over a simple girl? A girl who spoke softly, who was always critically thinking about something, who had eyes like lavender and the storm raged sea, whose smile was like sunshine? Alexander sighed at the realization she was thoroughly entangled in his head. Gods damn it all, bother someone else today would you... and yet his heart yearned for that smile for another minute longer.

Annoyed enough for the moment that the distraction was taking him from work, he removed his hands from the engine pieces set before him and looked over at his supervisor. "I'm taking my break. If my father comes asking for me, tell him I'm in the the study." the supervisor nodded and sent him away.

Alexander closed the door behind him and collapsed into one of the chairs with an exhausted sigh. Thankfully no one else was in the room, so he could have complete silence to relax in, to try and focus his mind on something other than work and the princess of Figaro who seemed determined to mine up all his time.

I need to do something about that, he thought tiredly, closing his eyes, seeing her face. After everything is said and done, I need to focus her someplace else so that I am forced to forget about her. He knew it would be difficult—that the princess was not someone you could easily forget—but he had to. It wasn't in his plans for anything else, after all. Perhaps some time set aside to find her a good, sturdy fellow her age. He tried to think on such a kid, but he drew a blank each attempt. But surely there a boy out there that could be good for her? And yet in his mind, he wanted to be the one to make her happy, without the ties he associated to the relationship part he dreaded and did not desire.

Gods though how she was pretty and sweet, and yet so stubborn.

Someone knocked on the door, thankfully pulling him from his thoughts. "Who is it?"

An exhausted, worried voice carried through the door. "It is me, Alexander. Can I come in?" immediately he was up to let her in. Whatever reason Cadence had for seeing him during work hours, it couldn't have been good. As soon as he opened the door, she hugged him, crying.

"Hey, hey...easy Cadence...what's wrong? Why are you here?"

"It is Emma," she cried against his chest, and he felt her trembling. "She's not eating or speaking to anyone, and—and now..."

"Wait, wait," he stopped her there. "What happened? Why isn't she eating? Is she sick?" how could everything go so wrong in just a few days?

Cadence then explained to him what had happened during the solstice, and how it affected the girl. Alexander wasn't sure what to make of the comment that Emma was acting so different it was like talking to another person, but he knew Cadence was serious. That the moment she said Terra was frightened, more frightened than ever, he needed to do something. He couldn't though, not without Cadence's consent. He couldn't risk doing something that could tip the girl towards a steeper decline or perhaps do something else that was entirely foolish.

"And you said it has been four days?" he asked again, feeling sick to his stomach. He couldn't imagine seeing her in the state that Cadence describe. Surely though that hearing the news of her brother couldn't, alone, send her to his emotional block? It just didn't make sense.

"I tried to talk to her Alexander, I did, but she was so...angry, so hurt. I promised Terra I would help, but I failed. Please, you have to try. You are the only one she cares to listen to. I don't care at this point how, just help her." the tears in her eyes showed Alexander just how deeply Cadence loved the princess, and it startled him. He never thought the bond was that deep. "Please, I'm begging you Alex, please."

He took her hands and squeezed them. "Cadence, you know you don't have to do that. I would do anything for you and for Emma. I'll do whatever I can to help her, to make her see sense. I promise."

Cadence took him into a hug and sobbed. "Thank you, thank you so much." little did Alexander realize just how desperate she was for help. "Thank you."

Alexander calmed Cadence down and after he was sure she was okay, walked her back to her residence and left her in the care of her father, who was already appraised of the situation it seemed. Alexander then made his way to the inner castle, and prepared a length chiding for the princess. It was important to make sure that Emma understood it was not right to worry her loved ones this way, but he also knew that she had trouble understanding that and needed help with it, so he had to be careful with the wording. It wasn't her fault, after all, that it came as a difficulty to her. No one could be faulted for such a thing.

The admission into the inner castle was more tedious today than it ever was, and he chalked it down to the news of the crowned prince's capture. With the last male heir in Figaro, it meant security had to be tightened. There were dozens of soldiers in every hall, in every room, and constantly inspecting every new visitor and every cart and such. It was hysteria but one that was required. If Figaro was to lose its male heir, it would collapse. No one would follow a queen or her daughter, and you had to be deaf to miss the accusations and smears against the two on the streets. Women were still a thing of necessity for breeding to many, and it showed.

They are acting like Cambyses and Edgar are dead already, he grumbled as he walked down the halls towards the main room. Two soldiers were arguing with a peddler about why he had to turn around, that selling inside the castle was currently prohibited, but the old man wouldn't listen.

Inside the long hall leading to the throne room, he found Terra. She was staring at family portraits with a look of longing. And as he got closer, he realized by the dark rings around her eyes she hadn't had sleep in days. Damn it Emma...you are pushing your mother into this, can't you see that? He approached quietly, as to not startle her.

"Terra?" she turned and offered him a small smile. "I'm sorry...Cadence came to see me earlier. She told me everything. How are you holding up?"

The smile vanished. "As well as you would think, Alex, but I thank you for asking. You are always a sweet one..." she put her eyes back on the portraits, and Alexander followed suit. The picture in question did not have Emma in it. The boys were too young, so it was before her birth, though judging by Terra's appearance in the picture, she was with child. Edgar was standing beside her, stoic as always. "When we had this painted, I was thinking of the future portraits I would get to have." she sighed. "I prayed every night for a girl, for a little joyful spring breeze to grace the castle, and the gods had granted my request." he saw tears in her eyes. "Now I pray to ask them to help her and to ask them why they do so much evil against her..."

"Forget them," he said sharply, catching her eye. "Terra, the ones who did your daughter wrong did so because they could. Because they were twisted. The gods, even if they were real, didn't put them on that path. You think beings of that power would care enough to interfere in a low being's life like that?" she looked alarmed by that. "Evil exists because man was given the right to choose his path, if anything. And now your daughter suffers for it, she always will. What we can do for her is always be there for her, and so far you haven yet to fail that."

"I have. I cannot help her."

"That's bullshit and you know it," he said. "You have only ever been dedicated to your daughter, to the point that your husband glares at you when you spoil her." she smiled a little at that. "See, you know it. I've seen that fool grumble about it, and so has Cadence. You are a wonderful mother Terra. You sacrifice even your own health to help your daughter."

"Then why isn't it enough?" she asked him softly. "Why can't I help her more?"

"Because sometimes she's dealing with things a mother can't help with," he said. "You can only do what you can when you feel you must and give her space when you feel it is right. Now though...now is not the right time for the later. You need to make her listen to you, to put your foot down, and make her eat."

"Oh, Alexander, I have tried, so very hard, but she ignores me. Other times she gets so angry I can scarcely recognize her." she wiped at her eyes. "Now she wants to leave me behind...what more could I do to convince her to listen to me when it has come to this?"

Alexander couldn't believe what he just heard. "Wait...what? What do you mean?"

She looked at him, confused. "Cadence didn't tell you?" he shook his head. "Emma wishes to go back to Thamasa." she started to sob. "My little baby doesn't even feel safe or wanted in her own home and it is all my fault...so how can I call myself a good mother Alexander?" she tried to hide her tears behind her handkerchief.

Alexander couldn't make sense of any of it. Leaving to Thamasa to avoid Benjamin's anger when she still had her mother, uncle and Cadence? And a friend, at least he hoped she thought so, in him? When she stayed against the insults and accusations that she deserved her assault? No. Emma was many things, in truth, but a girl who would act on impulses like that? No, it didn't make sense. She would want to be here for when her eldest brother returned, or to offer help to bring him back should she not. She loved them all that much, Benjamin too, even when he slung his vile words at her.

There must be something else going on, he thought, and was a little frightened by it. What else could make her want to leave the family she only ever wanted to be around? And the idea that there was something else that she was refusing to tell her own mother, and in turn frightening her and making her worry with ill, infuriated Alexander. Never had he known Emma to be selfish before, and the moment she decided to be, it was in the worst way possible.

That fury was building to a point he couldn't control. "Damn it Terra!" she looked at him with wide, frightened eyes. "Why are you just letting her leave? Keep her here! You know she needs to stay with her family!"

Terra tried to explain, the stammers marred by her sobs. "I cannot hold her against her wishes Alexander, if she would feel more comfortable and safe back in Thamasa. Who am I to tell her she can't have that?"

The anger was making his ears ring. "Who are you?!" the guards at the end of the hall turned their heads to look at the shouting, alarmed. "You are that girl's mother! Her queen! Tell the fool she cannot leave!"

"S-she made up her decision," she tried. "If I tell her no, she will hate me and I can't have that. I...I can't lose more of her Alexander."

"For fuck's sake!" he turned and threw his fist through the wooden support alongside the portraits. Terra was so startled, she gave a cry and leapt back, hand on breast. "Emma is a child, Terra! A god damn child! She doesn't know what is good for her! Only you do! And I know you know this is a horrible decision!"

Tears bubbled in her eyes. "Of course I know that, but...but if I tell her no, if I don't...she—she won't love me any more. I could lose my eldest son and Benjamin hates me...I can't lose her too, I can't Alexander."

Alexander took a breath to collect his anger, but it was raging within him like a storm. He understood though that Terra was acting out of a place of fear. She was mistaking Emma's fear and grief as hatred and distrust, and so she didn't understand that her daughter's decisions stemmed from panic of loneliness and fear. That Emma would only ever unconditionally love her family. The source of the problem, it became clear, was Emma. He needed to talk to her, not convince Terra to hold Emma in Figaro against her will. It would solve keeping her in sight and safe, but it wouldn't solve the underlying issue.

"Terra, listen to me..." he reached out to take her hand. "I am sorry for shouting at you, I am just frustrated. I know you love your daughter, but you must believe me. Emma could never hate you, no matter what you did. Some would call it a fault in her, but she could never disregard her family, not even Benjamin. You know it, that is why she never talked foully of him or the like."

Terra sniffled. "She is my sweet little girl..."

"But I cannot allow you to let her move back to Thamasa, when I know you would regret it, not only because you would miss her but because you would realize it is a danger to her safety and to her mental health." she tried to speak, but he cut her off. "And I know...you cannot convince her or get her to talk. That is why I am here. Cadence asked me to talk to her. I would ask you to put your trust in me. I may not be family, but I think she trusts my judgment enough that when I tell she cannot go, she will listen. I will not go to her without your permission though, as I do not intend to tackle this issue very lightly."

Terra looked at him squarely, considering, before relenting and nodding. "You have my permission. Do what you must, just...do not be too hard on her. Her brother has been so cruel to her lately and the recent news of Cambyses has been a crushing blow."

"I will be as furious as I need be, Terra, but I will get your daughter to stay and be healthy, I swear it." he kissed her knuckles. "Now I must ask that you go and rest. I cannot handle this with the idea that you are exhausted and grief stricken."

She smiled at him patiently. "In some ways Alexander, you are more of a dog than Edgar ever was." she shook her head before she gave him a small hug. "Save my daughter." and then she kissed his cheek and walked away with clear weakness but great gratitude and hope.

Alexander left in such a fury he didn't even know when he arrived in the princess' wing. He had never seen the queen like that before, so vulnerable and frightened of what was to come, of losing her daughter for good this time. He wondered as he fought over the desire to burst into the princess' room if the queen was feeling the same things she had the night her daughter had been raped. The uncertainty. The fear. The inability to help. Alexander knew the moment he saw those tears he wasn't going to let Emma have her way, no matter what pain she was in, it was never better to abandon those who loved you.

The fury in him was righteous! Or so he thought. When he reached for the door, everything fell around him when he heard her muffled cries. His anger, his disappointment, flooded away, replaced by pity and something he couldn't pin down. His heart wretched as he pushed the door open and walked in.

Despite what the poor queen had told him, what Cadence had wept in his arms, the girl was not packing for travel. Her room was disorganized in ways he had never seen it, surely, but what he saw was a girl in a distress she couldn't find help for. She sat at the end of her bed, arms wrapped around a beaten pillow, with which she hid her face and her cries in.

Alexander paused just a foot or so away. "Emma," she did not acknowledge him. A piece of him grew annoyed by that. "You can't do this...not every time something or someone hurts you."

"Please," she sobbed. "Just l-l-leave me alone..."

"You think this is the right way to deal with your pain?" he asked, aware of just how angry he sounded. "To run away from those who love you?"

She mumbled. "They have never l-loved me..."

"You don't believe that," he couldn't accept that she did, even if he felt the sadness in her voice, the acceptance of it. "I know you don't. What about your mother? Do you honestly think she has never loved you? If not your brothers or your father she has only ever thought of you every day of your life."

"How do you know that?" she had removed herself from the pillow to look at him, and the tear stricken eyes plagued him with so much pain he couldn't bare it. "You couldn't..."

"I know what I have seen," he insisted. "I have seen a mother love you so much that she neglects herself. I have seen a father that loves you so much that he is overprotective to the point that he can't let you grow. I know they often make mistakes in how they show that love Emma—I know you have grown up without them—but they have only ever done the things they have done because they love you. You cannot imagine the difficult task it is to be a parent, to figure out what is right by you and what is wrong, to know what those decisions could mean later on. They are trying their best."

"It doesn't matter," she wept. "I can't stay...not a-anymore."

"Because of Cambyses' capture?" he asked hotly. "Emma...this isn't your fault! Damn what Benjamin has to say about it! How could this possibly be your fault? You didn't force your brother to go, you didn't force him to do whatever it was he did to get caught! You certainly didn't lead the men who caught him!"

Emma's cries worsened. "You wouldn't understand..."

Alexander knelt and went to take her hand, but decided against it. It didn't seem right, not at that moment. "Please Emma, give me a chance...help me to understand."

"I feel like I'm..." she hesitated. "I'm...not myself." the look on her face told him she was desperate to explain whatever it was she was trying to tell him, to be understood. And frustrated that she was seemingly failing at it. "This...this feeling...I can't..."

"Emma, what feeling?"

It was rare when the princess of Figaro looked at him—or any other, for that matter—so when she found strength to hold his gaze, he found it impossible to look away. "I've been..." the words were difficult, he could tell that, and yet the strain it seemed to put on her seemed unreal. Almost as if it were causing her pain. "...I've been hearing—" she suddenly cried out and leaned forward, pressing her hands against her head.

Frightened Alexander immediately leapt to her side and took her into his arms. "Emma, what's wrong?" she was stiff in his arms for several seconds until at last she seemed to relax into his arms, though she was trembling. "What just happened to you?" he asked, lifting her up to help her get support against the bed.

Her skin was pale and she was still trembling, but it was her wide, fearful eyes that shook him the most. She weakly peeled out of his arms. "It...it was n-nothing."

"That wasn't nothing Emma," he said softly. "You were trying to tell me you felt something, was that it? Are you still in pain?"

"No," she mumbled tearfully, and he reached out again to steady her trembling. "I...I'm just s-scared..."

"Why?"

"I—I f-feel like I'm slipping away...like...I'm not me anymore. That I'll wake up one day and I won't be here."

Alexander took her hand in his and squeezed. "Listen to me Emma, no matter what happens, if you feel lost or if you can't find yourself, then I promise you that I will go and find you." his words had filled her eyes with tears and before he could reject the very intimate move, she was hugging him, her head tucked against his arm and left breast. He felt something he couldn't describe, something he knew was dangerous, not only to the poor girl weeping in his arms, but for his own good too.

Emma Aden Aria Figaro was a girl no one could touch, that no one could ever deserve. She was a polished gem among coal, he knew it, and yet here she was, reaching out to him when she felt she couldn't even do that with her family. He knew the path forward from her, if he let this continue, would be disastrous. That the plunge through the ice would be devastating. A part of himself was screaming to push her away, to tell her to stop, that he didn't like her like that, to press harsh boundaries, and yet a piece of him felt at peace to have her so close to him. To feel the warmth of her in his arms, to know she put her trust in him.

Despite knowing better, he put his arms around her and drew her closer to him, so he could smell the citrus in her hair and the soft scent of honey on her skin. He wanted so terribly to hold her like this forever, to run his hands through her hair and kiss her. A pressing warning echoed in his mind though. Cadence's voice, sharp like a knife, cut through the temptation.

Cadence is right...she's just a kid, lost and confused, he tried to tell himself. A kid, only a kid. Over and over again, to resist giving into his urges, to resist the idea that maybe this once it could be more than whatever he always pursued. That Emma could be more, and that he could give her more than she could ever ask for. No! She's not like that...she's not like how you think. She's...she's a child. Hurt and alone...a child. Just be a friend, that is all. He couldn't take this. He wouldn't risk being around her, not like this. He had to leave.

Abruptly he pushed her aside and got to his feet. "I should leave."

Emma gave him such a confused expression for a moment it seemed like she might cry, but then something clicked and her eyes went wide. He saw horror in her eyes. "I'm...I'm sorry Alex, I just—I just wasn't...I won't do it again, I promise."

"What are you talking about?" he was afraid to ask, but he knew deep inside what she thought. What he had done. "What won't you do again?" he could see the panic fill her expression.

"Touch you." her answer was so soft, so terrified, that he couldn't find the words to reply to her. He had hurt her in trying not to hurt her. Maybe Cadence was right—maybe he was an idiot. Everything he did turned things into a mess, and now he had convinced the princess that her touch had repulsed him. "I j-j-just w-wasn't thinking, and I was t-tired, I pro—" He couldn't let her think that way.

Damn it all, he thought before he went back to her side again giving her only enough to get out a "What—" before he leaned forward to gently grace her lips with his. It lasted only a second or two before he leaned away to look at her eyes. Her eyes were wide and she lifted a hand to her lips. "you...you kissed me?"

The genuine surprise in her voice startled him. He would always be realizing just how far her insecurity went. He offered her a small smile. "I did." and despite what Cadence made him think would happen, the world did not stop—and that only made him want to kiss her again and again.

And now distracted from her earlier problems, her eyes focused on him entirely, such pretty things. And then came that strangeness of hers. "Why?" Her disbelief and distrust in her own worth was going to be the end of her, and himself. Why was she so hard on herself? Surely her experiences in Thamasa did not, solely, create this insecure girl? Was it really that difficult for her to believe that he liked her company, or at the very least found her beautiful?

She asked him again. "Why?" but this time, he leaned forward again to kiss her, to stop her questions. It was longer this time, and it was only when he felt her stiffen slightly that he stopped, afraid he had pushed too far too fast. However, when he looked at her face, he did not see any rejection. What he saw in her eyes was a longing that had been left in a pool of pain for far too long.

He knew though he had to ask her, for the girl she was, for the fear in her, for the pain put on her. He couldn't put himself on her like that without her consent. "Did I push too far?" he asked quietly, taking her hand. He could feel her trembling and feared he had. She shook her head.

"N-no, I...I just..." the blush on her was more than enough of an explanation. She didn't know what to do in a situation like this. His smile grew a bit. How to kiss, is that? He thought as he brought her hand to his lips. He knew asking if that was it would just embarrass her further, so he said nothing as he grazed her knuckles with a kiss.

"Let me show you," he whispered, hoping he sounded soothing, that he gave her comfort. For a moment it seemed she would deny him, but then she nodded, and he wrapped an arm around her to bring her closer to him. She was still stiff in his arms, but he now understood why. It wouldn't matter how long ago her assault was, it would always carry with her. She would always be on edge. He would need to be careful with her, soft and loving, to show her that not all men are like those who had wronged her.

Alexander knew his approach had to be different to whatever Lucas and the others had done to her, to stop her memories from immediately stirring. It didn't take a genius to know that she had her triggers. He didn't know what they did to her, but he hoped he could be soothing and loving despite her horrors. He nuzzled her neck with kisses, as slow as he had mastered through his tumbles with other women. Emma's breathing hitched and he could feel her pulse racing against his lips.

Please gods, do not let me frighten her, please. He hoped that if they were real they'd grant his prayers concerning the girl at the very least. If anyone deserved better, it was her. Slowly he inched his way up to her lips, acutely aware that her breathing was erratic as he lowered her to the floor to continue his administrations. He glanced down and noticed that she was absentmindedly twisting the ends of her shirt. He smirked. Her nervous tweaks were insanely adorable. He took her lips again and hoped it was enough of a distraction so that when he went to lift her shirt up it wouldn't startle her as much.

When she stiffened like a rock beneath him, he meant to stop, to ask if he had pushed too far, but felt her hands hesitantly touch the sides of his torso and grip the fabric of his shirt. She made no other move to turn him aside. Her eyes were squeezed shut though, terrified, and he knew. She was trying so very hard, to push aside her memories, to be in that moment. After a few seconds, she let him go and he went to continue to remove her shirt.

When his fingers brushed the warmth of her flesh, he felt a fire sear through him. Her breath hitched then, but he kept moving his hand up her ribs until he felt swell of her breasts. He leaned down and began kissing his way up from her stomach to her throat. He felt the tightness in his chest restrict further when her voice crept through the quiet of her room.

"A-Alex..." The uncertainty of her voice worried him. Thinking he was moving too fast, he inched his way back to her lips. And then it happened. He felt her lips begin to move, nervously and slowly, against his.

He saw sparks, and it felt as if someone had run a red hot iron down his spine. It was definitely her first kiss. It wasn't sloppy, no it was too delicately taken for that, but entirely inexperienced. It was unsure, slow and afraid, just like her. Her breath smelled and tasted of the red hot candies she loved to eat—often at the annoyance of her mother—and it twisted him into a knot. It was like she was undoing his existence, pulling at exposed tendrils to unravel him. Oh how he would think back to this day for the rest of his life.

He could feel his own heart racing, racing so terribly fast he thought it would give out. He parted from her lips, hoping it would give him some measure of control, and felt her hot breath against his face even as he tried not to look at her. If he did, he would lose himself in those eyes.

He sat up, hoping the distance between them would grant him more control, and she sat up too, following him he knew because she was uncertain. He told himself not to look, that the sight of her would push him back to his unruly displays, but then she displayed that quirkiness of hers. That sweet directness that others had found insulting or strange.

"You taste funny." he chuckled. I must have been good, he thought, willing himself to finally look into her eyes. She faltered and looked down. Otherwise, why let me do this Emma? He reached out to brush hair out of her face before he gently lowered her back to the floor. Her face was flushed now, and he saw tears in the corner of her eyes. He waited, watching her for a moment, before she found her voice again. "Alex?"

You are so beautiful, he thought, and I don't deserve you. And yet to his shame, he drew her to his lips again, letting his hands roam down to her breasts. He kissed her as passionately as he dared to, paying close attention to the way she breathed to guide himself, to know if he pushed too fast, but he only ever flew to her acceptance. He felt her nipples harden in his hands and feeling more of his control slip from him, broke from her lips to take them into his mouth, but stopped when he heard the hard knock on the oaken door that separated her room to the outside.

"Emma? Sweety, I've something to talk with you about, can I come in?" it was Cadence!

It was enough to startle him to his feet like some green boy. He knew if he were caught here like this with the princess it would be the death of him. Emma sat up clumsily, her skin flushed and her breathing ragged. Her eyes were wide and sprinkled with tears, but he hadn't the mind at the moment to pay them his attention. Fear had stolen him.

He didn't have the time to explain to her what they were doing was wrong to her family and friends, that should they be caught he would be punished, so he took her shirt and tossed it at her. He needed to calm the fire burning in him before Cadence decided waiting wasn't in her nature and barged in to see what he had been doing with the poor princess of Figaro.

"D-Did I do s-something wrong?" she asked quietly, trembling. She wasn't dressing, and that wouldn't do. He stole a look at her and swore. Gods was she beautiful.

"Emma, look, we don't have time for this, Cadence is here. Get dressed." he dared no louder a voice than the whisper he managed.

"...w-was I k-kissing w-wrong?"

"Emma?" Cadence called from the hallway. "Come now, I don't want to stand out here forever."

"Emma, please," he pleaded. "Get dressed, before she forces her way in here and sees us!"

Finally she let the tears fall. "I d-don't understand," she whispered. "What did I d-do wrong?"

Horrified that he had frightened her and horrified that the delay would skin him alive, Alex knelt before her and kissed her lips for a second or two. "You did absolutely nothing wrong, Emma. I just need you to get dressed. If Cadence catches us, we will be in trouble. Please, get dress."

He could tell by her expression that she didn't quite understand why they had to keep it a secret from Cadence, but she listened regardless. As she was putting her shirt back on, he caught sight of her breasts and chided himself for thinking one more minute looking—touching—wouldn't hurt. You headless dog! If Cadence catches you, she will skin you alive!

"Okay, that's enough, now I'm worried! Open this door before I get a guard's key!"

Alexander hurriedly brought Emma to her feet. She was still flushed, but he prayed Cadence wouldn't think anything of it. "Listen to me Emma, she cannot know of what we were just doing."

"Why?" she asked as she adjusted her shirt.

"She will not approve, but above all else, she will tell your mother and uncle, and they will disapprove. It will be...considered wrong. We..." he hesitated. "We would get in trouble. You must keep this a secret. If she asks why I was here, tell her a lie."

"A l-lie?" she asked, frightened. "B-b-but I c-can't! Cadence will know, she a-a-always knows."

"You have to lie," he said. "You have to. Just tell her I was here to talk to you about a book or something, anything. If she presses you on it, just ignore her."

"Please Alex," she cried. "Please don't leave me with her, I won't be able to lie, I won't." before he could respond, they heard Cadence return to the door.

"Emma, please, just open the door. Don't make me use this key."

Emma looked at Alexander before going to the door to open it. As soon as she did, Cadence pushed the door open all the way and welcomed herself in. As soon as she saw Alexander standing awkwardly off to the side, her eyes narrowed at him for a flat second before going to Emma. "Why didn't you answer the door Emma? I called you several times."

"I...I was..." she took a breath. "I w-wanted to be alone."

Cadence's cool eyes burned on her for a hot second before going to Alexander. He knew she suspected something, but he hoped she did not know what they had done. "And you? Why are you here still?"

"I don't have to answer that," he snapped. "Emma likes my company, you know."

"Hm, I bet she does," she said, and even he knew his cheeks warmed. He needed to get out of here before something was said or done. Cadence had her ways of unraveling people's secrets. She was a mastermind at it. Even with him. And he feared being around Emma made him too weak to hide his secrets and desires. He wanted her, and it showed in the way he looked at her, especially now. "Now make yourself useful for once and leave."

Alexander passed the princess one look before walking out of the room. Gods, what have I done...

••••••••••••

Emma felt the courage to be alone with the woman leave her as soon as Alexander left her alone. The cracks in the foundation of her began to spread until she feared it could no longer hold up. She knew that if the woman pressed her, no lie would hold before her.

And just as the quiet formed around them again, the young woman's cool, piercing eyes-so much like her mother's-found Emma's and the fear in her heart doubled. Why did he leave me here alone? Why? I can't do this, I can't do this. Emma tried to think about what to say for whenever the woman would question her on Alexander, for she knew it was coming. She thought back to the lies she had told to her guardians back in Thamasa about her bullying at the academy, to hide the bruises or the turmoil in her heart when a professor would call upon her in front of the class to humiliate her like so many others who had stood out as terribly as she, but the lies faltered in her. All she could see were the moments where she messed up the lies, when Relm and Gau figured out her little secrets or when she was successful and it only wrought more pain.

Still, what was any of that to lying to Cadence? The woman seemed to possess eyes that saw through everything. Emma swallowed back a long string of early excuses of why they did what they did—she wasn't even sure, she just knew she didn't want him to get in trouble on her behalf—but the words died off when Cadence looked at her sharply.

"Now I only asked that idiotic lecher to see you to convince you to take care of yourself. Pray tell me he succeeded in convincing you?"

Emma wondered why he had originally visited, especially after so long. "I..."

"If you will not eat for yourself, at least eat for your mother. She has been so dreadfully worried Emma." How could she explain to Cadence that she simply did not feel hungry? There was a pit in her that ate away everything she felt, everything but the pain and self loathing. Yet it was surprising the woman didn't send Alexander here to convince her to stay, or that she wasn't fighting her over it.

"You...you don't care if I leave?"

"Of course I care if you leave, but who am I to argue with you over it? Your mother and I only want what is best for you. If you would feel safer, in any way, back with Relm and Gau, we wouldn't stand in your way. Your mother especially. It hurts her she can't provide you that emotionally support, but she loves you enough to help you find it however she can. For now she's worried sick that you haven't eaten in days Emma, and rightfully. With your condition, you should not be so neglectful."

Emma felt tears in her eyes. "Okay...I'll t-t-try."

Cadence smiled. "That's all we want, is for you to be healthy and happy. I'll bring back something for you to eat." she went for the door, only to stop and look back at her with sharp, curious eyes.

••••••••••••

Emma rubbed at her eyes with her palms. "W-w-what?"

"Something seems...off," she said, staring. "Why exactly didn't you answer the door the first time I called?"

Panic gripped her little heart. "I...I was sleeping."

"With Alexander in the room? Regardless, weren't you two talking?"

"I mean I...we w-were, but I wasn't listening so I...I didn't hear you."

"So you weren't sleeping?"

"T-that was before."

"Before?" she asked, brows arching curiously. "Before what? The talking but after me knocking?"

"Yes..."

A smile crept across Cadence's face and Emma just knew she had failed to displace the woman's interest. "So then by all accounts you should have heard me."

Feeling extremely defensive, and isolated, Emma's anger snapped. "Well I didn't hear you."

The tease faded from Cadence's expression and her eyes drew a bit colder. "Alright, if this is how you wish to play it," she took a moment to collect whatever words she was going to say and then took Emma by the arm and dragged her to a chair to force her into it. "I was going to bring this up gently, because I adore you and I know you have a gentle soul, but perhaps that is what got us in this situation in the first place."

"What are you t-talking about?"

"Emma...I am not a damn fool," she almost snapped. "I know you are lying to me, I knew you would give me lies before you even said anything." her cheeks pinked. "And that's okay, because I know a certain cretin put you up to it. And that's what worries me. Why would that lecherous putz have you lie?"

"I—I—"

"That was rhetorical, Emma, I believe I already know."

"I don't know—know what you are talking about."

"Now, that is precisely what someone would say when they are trying to hide something," she said through a small smile, one that seemed to mock. Emma knew she was going to cry. She had tried to warn Alexander that she couldn't do this, and yet he had left.

"I'm n-not hiding anything," Emma tried to fight back. "Even if-if I w-were hiding something, why would I tell you?"

This time Cadence's patience was not to be tried. "Now you listen to me Emma!" she snapped, and the girl froze. "I have tried to approach this delicately, but I see he has rooted himself into it too thoroughly for you to listen to sense!" she took a breath and crossed her arms. "I knew the moment I opened the door and found him in here. You wouldn't have let me stand outside there like some idiot if he wasn't involved, you are too kind even when you are angry. So you have one last chance to tell me what happened before I take this to your mother, and believe me Emma, you do not want her to find out about this."

Emma stood. "No, you can't! Please Cadence, please! Promise me, please!"

"Gods help me, but I'll do what I must."

"He didn't do anything wrong," she cried, letting her tears flow. "Please Cadence, please, just leave it alone, we stopped!"

"That isn't enough," Cadence snapped. "It is the fact that he put himself on you in the first place. And I knew he did just that the moment I stepped in here, the way he couldn't look you in the eyes and the way you're so flushed and skittish. To think though he would do this to you..."

"He didn't do anything!"

"He didn't do anything?" she asked, eyes narrowing. "What do you take me for Emma? An idiot? I know Alexander. He didn't stop at just kissing you, did he?" at her stammering Cadence rolled her eyes. "This is unacceptable behavior Emma. He should have known better than to touch you like this."

Emma knew the tone. She was threatening something more. Threatening to tell. "Oh please Cadence, please promise...promise you won't say anything!"

"Heavens girl, no need to have a panic attack, it isn't like anyone would blame you. That heathen on the other hand? He has only ever chased skirts and it is high time he has been put in a proper place." little did Emma know the woman was just trying to talk it up out of frustration, and to scare Emma a bit out of ever giving in to Alexander's flirtations and sexual seductions again, but she had taken it to heart. And it broke her. She started to cry.

"I'll d-do anything you want Cadence," she cried. "Just please don't get him in trouble, please!"

"Calm down, calm down," she said, taking the girl by the shoulders to stop her. "At the least Terra would banish him from the castle grounds, and the most Sabin would execute him. You personally have nothing to fear." a sob broke free and the girl covered her eyes, but Cadence chuckled nervously. "Emma, I was just playing around. You know your uncle and mother, would they really do something so drastic? Well, perhaps a banishment may be appropriate..."

"I d-d-don't want him to be p-punished," she cried. "Please...please..."

"Emma, listen to me," she tried to calm the girl. "Emma, please, calm your tears for just a moment...there we go, calm yourself. I just want to talk to you about what happened, that's all."

Emma sniffed and wiped at her nose. "Why do we have to t-talk about it?"

Cadence said, "Because you need to understand that what he has done to you is wrong. That above all else, it isn't fair to you."

"I...I don't understand." The expression the poor girl gave her certainly got that across. There were so many things in the outside world the girl needed to learn and unfortunately love and intimacy would be the hardest one for her now, after her assault. How could Cadence explain to her what was wrong with the two courting without further confusing or hurting her? She didn't want to tell her that Alexander's true intentions were to simply make her feel more secure with herself or that he was a lustful man—and then explain what the hell that meant. If Emma knew that, here and now, it would crush her. And yet, if Cadence let Alexander continue with his debauchery with such an innocent and trusting person like Emma, Cadence knew it would spell disaster for her. It meant needing to tell her sooner rather than later. Whether it hurt her or not.

For now though, the problem that stood between her and the girl was getting Emma to understand why Alexander could not be allowed to do the things he did.

She thought perhaps the best way to approach it was with age. "Emma, dear girl, you...you are still only a child."

"So?" she mumbled.

"He is an adult," she tried, but Emma looked at her like she made no sense. "He's your senior, by several years."

"I know how to count," she snapped. "He's only three years older than me, why is that such a problem?" Emma took to twisting the ends of her shirt when she passed the girl a heated stare. "I just don't understand why it matters. Mother was younger than father, and...and you are older than Camb."

She had a point there, but Cadence knew she couldn't let Emma feel like she won something that wasn't even being debated. "There is a difference Emma. Both your mother and I were older when we got involved with those we loved. We were more mature."

Emma looked so defeated. "But...but Alexander and I...we...we aren't that far apart. Just a few years..."

"That is more than enough for now Emma," she said. "You are still just a child...perhaps when you are older you can pursue relationships, perhaps even with Alexander, but for now you cannot. The age difference is just too much." well, not entirely so, but she needed to give a reason the girl wouldn't argue with. The age seemed like the most likely way she'd convince Emma it was taboo.

"It—it isn't that much of a d-difference," she mumbled tearfully. "W-why does it matter if—if the people l-love each other?"

Cadence was sure she went completely pale. Love? "Oh Emma...dear...no." how could this end up so horribly so fast? Why didn't she stop Alexander when she had the chance? Why did she have to be so stupid?

The princess looked at her, ashamed. "I...I do," she started to twist the ends of her shirt, sniffling. "I'm sorry...I t-tried not to, I d-did, but I can't h-help it..."

If the gods are good, it is only a crush. "You have never felt this kind of thing before, Emma, what you are feeling...it is just a crush, that is all."

Emma's face bunched up, and Cadence knew what was coming. Pure anger. "I know how I feel," she snapped. "I...I've felt a..." she hesitated before lifting her eyes to her, and Cadence felt the menace in them. "You need to g-go, now!"

Cadence refused to move. "We have to discuss this Emma, please! Tell me what he did to you exactly, so that I may talk to him about it—"

Horrified the girl let her go and gaped at her. "He only k-k-kissed me!"

"I don't believe that for a second!" she took Emma by the arm to settle her down, for she started to push at her again. "Settle down, come on, settle down...before I have to guess out loud what you two were doing." that instantly froze the girl. "Good. Now are you going to tell me or do I have to go to ask Alexander?"

Finally having enough, Emma shoved her back and surprised, Cadence took several steps back. "I want you to leave," she cried out. "Now!"

"Emma, please, calm down—"

"Get out!"

Oh...sometimes you are so annoyingly stubborn! Cadence turned on her heels to stomp out of the room, boiling with rage. She turned back to look at the princess just as she neared the door, feeling the anger leaving her just as quickly as it had formed. "Please understand...I'm not trying to hurt you. I just want to talk this over with you, so that you know you aren't alone." and then Emma narrowed her eyes as she obviously tried to control her anger and then she closed the door softly. Cadence knew she was originally going to slam it. Well...better than I expected. She needed to find Alexander and beat the living hell out of him for what he had done.

When she left Emma she wasn't exactly sure where she would find Alexander knowing something serious had just gone on between the two, but she knew he wouldn't be fool enough to stick around the castle. If the queen, or worse Emma's uncle, caught wind of what he had done, he would surely be a pulp of what he once was. Even Terra had her limits, and Sabin had come to love Emma as his own. If he knew she was dishonored, it would make him furious. And then whenever Edgar found out? No. Cadence had to avoid it as long as possible for now, until it was possible to present it to Terra without causing a scene.

As she suspected, he had squared himself as far away from the castle as reasonably possible. In the basement of the outer landing platforms of the castle, where emergency landings took place. He was fiddling with something and it was obvious he wasn't paying attention to it at all. His brows were furrowed and he kept messing it up.

"Somehow, I just knew you would be sulking away in here, and for no good reason mind you."

He ignored her jab. "What do you want, Cadence?"

"I think you know," she said as she walked around the small basement, eying all of the contraptions and tools and oddities, before finding a seat among the overwhelmed chairs. She knocked a tool box aside and sat. "It involves Emma."

He concentrated even harder on his work. "No."

"No? Why, I'm quite sure that it does."

"I won't talk about her, or it."

"So you admit there is an it to discuss?"

He scowled at his work. "I know Emma couldn't keep it quiet, not from a nosy woman like you. The poor girl never stood a chance against you."

"And yet you laid her in the trouble of it all the same?" she asked, annoyed. "You know how she does with secrets, with that sort of emotional turmoil. Why would you do that, above everything else?"

"You could have just left her alone," he grumbled.

"You know I can't," she said, leaning into her chair. "She's easily confused, she's not like your other girls."

"Would you stop that?" he looked at her with sharp, angry eyes. "I know she's nothing like any other girl. I know that better than any of you."

"Then why? Why did you go into that room and do something so monumentally stupid? Especially now?"

Alexander set aside his tools and sighed. "She...she touched me Cadence and thought..." he felt tears in his own eyes. "She thought she did something wrong." Cadence's eyes softened from the anger and annoyance just a bit. "She looked so afraid, like she had done something unspeakable."

"Alexander..."

"I'm sorry, I...I reacted without thinking." he shook his head. "It is over. It won't happen again."

"You really think that?" she asked him softly. "Alex...you have no idea the damage you just did."

"What are you talking about? Despite what you think, nothing happened. We stopped...you interrupted us."

"Oh, excuse me for the inconvenience!" she shouted, standing up. "You idiotic, pompous, no good lecherous dog! If you had just listened to me, if you had just left the poor girl alone, none of this would be happening!"

"Calm down Cadence, it was just a little fooling around, it never ended anyone's world."

"You are an ass!" she shoved him from his chair and he fell hard onto the floor. "She thinks she loves you, you jerk! And thinks you might feel the same way now because of what you just did!" he gaped at her like an idiot. "Oh? The great Alexander, master of the female, is afraid of a fourteen year old girl's feelings? I never thought I would see the day!"

That woke him from his stupor. He shifted himself up. "Shut up Cadence, you don't understand anything!"

"No!" she snapped, poking hard at his chest. "I warned you! I warned you this would happen and you blew it off! Now that poor girl has no idea that the person she loves was making her out to to be some fool. And when she finds out? She's going to be crushed! Because all you can do is think about yourself!"

"I wasn't using her!"

"You were! And you told me you wouldn't ever do more than kiss her, but you lied! You almost had sex with her Alexander! You have gone too far! You can't see her any more!"

"Who are you to tell me who I can and cannot see?" It only took a second for her fury to be seen in her eyes and he knew one more wrong word would end terribly for him, but no matter how furious she had no right keeping him from Emma, or vice-versa, and no one else had the right either. Not even her parents. "I'll seen her when I want—" she slapped him so hard his ears rang. "—what the hell?!"

"You will listen to me," she snapped. "You will not go near her until I say you can or if you are going to admit to her what you were doing. If you even think about going near her without my say so, I will go directly to Terra with this, am I clear?"

She had a feeling she went to far with the threat, but out of the two, Emma needed to be protected. She was fragile. Alexander glared at her before looking away. "Fine."

She couldn't be sure that was the end of it, he didn't seem to be very honest. "I mean it Alexander...stay away from her."

Her threats were beginning to piss him off. He turned to her. "And here I thought we were friends..." he touched his smarting cheek before continuing. "How long have you known me Cadence? Do you really think I would hurt Emma like that?"

"I do, actually, because you have already hurt her," she answered him, crying. "You are my friend Alex, and I love you like a brother, so it hurts to know that you did this to that poor girl. You should have listened to me and now..." she shook her head. "When she knows the truth she will be broken. You don't understand the importance of the feeling she has for you, or thinks she has for you, and you trampled all over it. You lied to her, deceived her, and to her it will be no different than what Lucas did to her."

That was the last straw. To compare him to Luke was too much. "I'm like Luke? You cannot be serious! I would never harm Emma, especially not like that!" her eyes held his, and he faltered. "All...all I was trying to do was...was..." the realization that he had, in fact, acted to deceive her, regardless of whatever intentions he told himself he did it for, hit him. He began to cry. "You're right...you're right..." he was ashamed and covered his eyes. "I'm no better than that filthy rapist!"

Cadence immediately went to take him into a hug. "Alexander, no, no, you are nothing like Lucas. Listen to me, listen..." she smoothed his hair down and made him face her. "You made a mistake, that is all, but you have time to fix it. You have the ability to stop this."

"I took advantage of her," he said. "I knew she liked me and I lied to her. I am no better than her rapist..."

"Enough," she snapped. "Whether or not you did these things, you can stop it here and now. You never meant her harm and that's where the difference lies, Alex."

"What should I do?" he asked. "How do I make this better? Please Cadence, help me, I don't want to hurt her."

"She needs to know the truth before this gets any worse." Cadence had thought of how the confrontation would go between Emma and Alexander, of what the lad would say to her, to justify his actions, or rather explain them. Of what he could say and do to apologize, to atone, but it seemed nothing could ever do. Cadence saw the end results being the same. Emma would be devastated. Heartbroken. Angry.

Suddenly she recalled the way the poor girl lost it on her brother and knew. Alexander could not be the one to tell the girl of his mistakes. She looked at him then. "Alex...I think it is best that I should handle telling her how you really feel."

She knew he understood that she was right, that with what had happened proved it. He nodded after a moment, but she could tell it hurt him to let this go out the way it was going. He felt he had to tell the girl. "Aye...that is probably for the best."

"Will you be okay, Alex?"

He nodded. "Yes, I...I just need to think."

I'm so sorry Alex, I should have been more gentle with my wording, she thought as she hugged him. "I will see you later. Please...don't do anything stupid Alexander." he acknowledged her with a simple nod, so she left him be.

Cadence wasn't sure if leaving Alex to himself was such a wise idea, but she knew he couldn't be the one to tell Emma the truth. If it came from him she wasn't sure how the princess would react. Everything needed to be handled delicately, so that the princess could understand the reasons behind Alex's actions, and hopefully if the gods were good, avoid becoming ballistic. If the poor girl had to experience one more tumble, it would ruin her, Cadence feared.

In the morning, Cadence would just have to confront the day the best she could, and hoped it would be better for Emma than the last.

••••••••••••

It was the crack of dawn when Edgar found himself being interrupted in his pavilion at the crest of the rocky hills. He had woken from nightmares and wishing to distract himself, moved to work immediately. Except the work did not come to him, only worry and guilt. The interruptions this time were of his daughter, as it had been since he had gotten the letter from his wife detailing his daughter's secret desires. It had been plaguing him since. Such a simple request, surely, to write to your daughter, but the words were lost to him every time he tried to find them. Suon tried to assure him that he only need write what was in his heart, but Edgar had too much to say and much of it was something you should not say nor explain over letter.

I've been such a fool to let it go on this long, he thought tiredly as he glanced at the blank pages before, mocking him of his failures towards his daughter. Come now Edgar, you can do this. She's just your daughter.

Suon stared at him from his little table across the pavilion. "Edgar, it has been too long already. The queen will need this letter in haste."

"I know, Suon, I know, but the words escape me." he felt a piercing pain in him. "I wish I could be there, to talk to her. To tell her what was in my heart, to explain to her why I was so foolish..."

"Edgar, my king, you have held levées with high lords and kings of other nations, talked to a diabolical emperor and negotiated with lunatics, do you really think a letter to your daughter is out of reach of accomplishment?"

"Of course not," he grumbled, realizing he looked rather ridiculous now. "I shall get to it then, Suon."

"Good, good." Suon went back to his papers on his little desk, very concentrated on his task. Edgar puffed once more, dipped his quill into the ink and began.

To Emma,

Let me begin this by first telling you my dear girl that this was a terribly difficult letter to write. I have so many things to apologize to you for that I know I cannot set right by itself with this, but all I can do from here is this. I must tell you though, I never intended to harm you, in any such way. If I ever made you feel any less loved or respected than your brothers, it was never my intention. It may be difficult to believe, especially after your assault, but I swear to you Emma my reasons for not seeing you were simply because I was afraid. And yes, that is the truth. I was afraid. I couldn't find the courage any time later to face you, to tell you that everything would be okay, or that I loved you, because I feared that if I did I would lose whatever self control that I had. That I wouldn't be able to express myself to you the way that I wanted to. Cowardly, I know, but the truth nonetheless. I couldn't take away your pain and I knew it was my fault that you went through what you did in the first place, so I couldn't face it. It isn't justifying not seeing you, nothing ever will, it simply explains my severe stupidity. And hopefully helps you to understand that it doesn't mean I do not love you, because I do. I know it is pathetic for a man who has faced death so many times to feel fear, especially for something so ridiculous, but men are strange like that dear. And very stupid. And I will carry that as my shame for the rest of my life, I know it, but know that I love you more than life itself and nothing will ever change that.

As for the prior letter, the one I had left in your room before the dinner. I am sorry I forgot about it. The dinner took over the space in my head and I forgot about it, but I would give whatever I could to go back and reword myself and make you smile. I am sorry I made you cry, my dear, I often think back to it and it piles onto my regrets heavily. I hope you can forgive that as well, though I wouldn't blame you one bit should you hate me for it all.

Lastly, I am aware that your brother has been harassing you severely of late. Your mother has been keeping me updated on the situation. I can say nothing more than I am ashamed when it comes to his behavior and that when I get home, I will deal with him, but beyond that I do have a few suggestions you can try to keep him in line, my dear. Don't let him know I told you, but he always was afraid of fopers, and should that not work...a good kick between the legs might make him stop. And you do have my permission in that regard, my dear. And Emma, I know you were told about your brother. There's no good way to be told, but to be told in the way that you were is one of the worst ways. I promise you though, I will bring Cambyses home. You have nothing to fear. We of the Figaro line are made tough. Just as you are.

Now please behave for your mother and remember to eat right and get your sleep. I would love to hear from you, should you wish to write, and remember Emma; I will always love you. No matter what.

Your father,

Edgar sat on the last line for a few minutes before committing to 'your father' instead of something he felt was a bit cheesy or too official, and then he had Suon read over it, as embarrassing as it was. He did not wish for it to be riddled with writing mistakes or come off as fake, or to seem as if he was just trying to shut her down until he could come back. Suon smiled at the end and handed the letter back.

"I thought he outgrew the foper fear," he laughed. "It will do, Edgar. Shall I prepare a gift with it?"

"I'm not sure," he mumbled, staring at the drying ink. "Would could I even give her from here?"

"You could instruct the carrier to buy whatever it is you desire at South Port before it is delivered."

"I think this will be enough," he looked at Suon. "Have it delivered immediately by hand please when it arrives on Figaro land. I do not want to risk the birds losing it."

"Of course," Suon bowed his head. "Are you heading out to see the scout party again, your grace?"

"I...I just need to know if they recovered anything, Suon." the look Edgar was given was one of pure pity, but what more could Edgar do in his position? He knew his heart of hearts that his son was already on his way to the Roskovo capitol, if not already there, but if there was a chance he was being held nearby until a larger force could come and retrieve them, Edgar needed to find their base.

"Your grace, the tracks led into the mountains—"

"I know that Suon!" he snapped. The man quieted and looked down. Edgar felt childish for the outburst and immediately apologized. "I...I just need to be sure, Suon. If there's a chance he's still out there, within reach..."

Suon reached over to touch his shoulder. "Then we will search under every rock and through every bush if we must my king, and if the rats can't be caught there, we will bring chaos upon their capitol for him."

Edgar thanked his friend and asked to be left alone, for some time to think. Suon nodded, bowed, took the letter and left the pavilion. Edgar sat into his chair with a heavy sat and felt the weight of his grief crashing against him. Between his daughter and his son, the pain was beginning to be too much. He couldn't lose any of them.

I will get him back. I will have my family whole again.

••••••••••••

The councilman was in the middle of a passionate exchange with a woman who owed from various favors when someone banged on the door, loudly. "Councilman!" the hushed whisper came. "Councilman, please! It's urgent!" the woman, desperate not to be caught as she was promised wouldn't happen, curled the blankets up around her, and slipped out of the bed.

"Calm yourself woman, it is one of my spies."

"You said no one would know!"

"What does it matter if my spy knows you whored yourself out to me?" he snapped, and she looked at him with anger and disgust. He turned away and left her be to go answer the door. In came a scrawny lad, clad in the colors of a carrier. In his hands, he carried a bag of letters and scrolls. He was puffing loudly, clearly having nearly killed himself running to get to him so fast. "What are you doing here in the broad daylight, you fool?"

"I made sure no one followed, sir," he managed between breaths. "I carry important information, from the king himself."

"The lion, or the snake?"

"Both," he said, still puffing some. He began to dig through the bag. He revealed to letters. He handed over a small note, simple in all. "His," and the councilman knew just by that whose note this belonged to. The king of Roskovo. "And he recent letter from the king of Figaro." he drew a heftier one out of the bag and carefully deposited it in the councilman's hands. "The instructions of what is to be done has been left, but the haste needs to be quick. The letter is to be delivered today, councilman Brud."

Brud looked the letter over from the Roskovian king. It was short and to the point. Rewrite the letter from Edgar to deal damage, to cause strife between the family. It was easier said than done. Curious, Brud, carefully took a candle and reheated the wax off the Figaro letter to read what was written. As he went on, he began to smile. A letter to the family runt. Now this will be something, he thought. "It will be done. Return here by the afternoon."

The carrier bowed. "I can easily delay until then." he hurried off. Brud went back into his quarters where the woman was still waiting. He looked at her, bored. "You can go now."

"What, is that all? What about my debt?!"

"You think one night covers all of your debt?" he snapped. "Be lucky I don't whore you out to half the council. Get out of my sight." she glared, took her clothes and cleared the room. When she was gone, he cleared his desk and sat aside his tools and got to work.

••••••••••••

A few days had gone by and Emma had kept herself busy in her room by reading and watching the birds in the courtyard garden below her window. It was the only thing she could do to distract herself from her brother and the turmoil of not knowing what to do with her feelings for Alexander, though she desperately wanted to tell him. She knew that Cadence was right, that what she felt needed to be said, and that the courage needed to be summoned, and soon, so she put her books aside and watched the birds soar prettily through the air, contemplating her situation.

I want to see him, she thought as she peeled her eyes away from the birds, overwhelmed with the realization that of everything she feared and everything she desired in her life, the thing above all else was always of Alexander first. In the morning when she woke, in the night when she slept, in the day when she was alone...always of him. She felt ashamed, and she didn't even understand why. She only understood it was because of him. She knew it was time. She got up and went to her desk. If there was ever a time to risk her friendship with Alexander, she supposed today was the best. Any other day she would lose whatever confidence she had built up. She wrote quickly, a request for his company, and then took a deep breath. She nearly crumpled the letter from the anxiousness in her, but stood tall and pressed forward for her door.

The guard outside would surely see the note fly out from under her door and see that it was address to Alexander Gabbiani, but she couldn't be sure he would deliver it without contacting her mother first. Uneasiness bubbled in her heart. If her mother knew she was secretly contacting Alexander, she wasn't sure what would happen. Emma never had any reason to sneakily ask about for him, and although Emma's intentions were not to be sneaky in this sense, she knew that her mother would pester he endlessly on something she herself didn't rightly understand. For now, she needed to talk to Alexander first.

As she reached for the door, it opened and in came her mother, smiling. Startled and afraid she would see the letter, Emma quickly hid it behind her, heart thrumming. "Mother...w-what..."

Her mother closed the door behind her, still smiling. "I'm glad you are up dear, though it is a bit surprising. The evenings usually are your preferred times to rest up."

Emma blushed. The way her mother worded it, it made it sound like she took nap times like a baby. "Did...did you n-need something?"

"Oh, yes! I almost forgot," she displayed something, a little letter with the royal sigil of Figaro sealed to it. Emma had forgotten that she had requested a letter from her mother, and given that it had been some time, she had figured the request was considered too much at an important time or declined altogether. And yet here it was. "This arrived for you about an hour ago. I wasn't sure if I should have delivered it immediately, I was worried you might have been resting."

Emma accepted it with uncertainty. "Would you like me to read it for you?" her mother asked, noticing her hesitation.

"N-no, I'm fine." she turned away from her mother and started to peel the letter open. The letter was a single page, folded neatly. She pressed it open smoothly and read.

To Emma,

It has come to my attention through numerous letters from your mother that you and your brother are in yet another spat, one that I have no doubt you instigated. I did not think my children would be so foolish as to create chaos while I am trying to conduct a rescue operation for their own kin, further distracting me, but I should have suspected the root of all problems to start another in such a harsh time. To free myself from these worries, I will be sending strict instructions to keep you separated from your brother and your mother as much as possible, to avoid pushing him to confrontation. I do not have the time for these petty squabbles of yours, and I had hoped you knew that but I see I misplaced my judgement. If I am made aware that you pushed this, that you disobeyed me, I will have Hals relocate you to East Gate, where your presence will not disturb anyone and where your brother may not reach you with his childish whining.

Do not disobey me. I will no longer tolerate the behavior. Behave yourself, and give your mother some rest. The gods know she deserves and needs it.

Your father,

She stared long and hard at the letters on the letter, the writing that was very much her father's, and yet the words she could not believe. She had never expected such cruel words, though she had always feared them in her nightmares. She had thought the last letter showed she was wrong, that her father did not dislike her, but she was wrong. It was a sick ploy the entire time. She felt the warm tears begin to swell in her eyes. How foolish of her to request a letter from the man who hated her. She crumpled the letter up and threw it to the floor, broken and yet angry. The voice was seething.

Never should have trusted them, only me, she said, quietly, over and over again.

Her mother was alarmed. "Emma, what's wrong?" she knelt to pick up the crumpled letter even as she spoke, letting the secret out. "I thought this is what you wanted? Your father took time to write this and—"

The anger was beginning to spill over. "You think I w-wanted that?!" her mother tried to calm her with a soothing touch, but Emma smacked her hand away. "Get out! Get out now!"

"Emma, please, let me—"

"I said get out!"

Her mother hesitated but turned and quickly left the room. Emma waited only a second before turning to her bed and falling to her knees beside it, to press her face against the quilts to quiet her sobs.

Do you understand now? Her voice asked. We are alone, now and forever. Us against the world.

••••••••••••

Terra hurried from the halls to the solar and closed the door behind her. She smoothed the letter against the nearest table's surface and began to read in her horror the cruel detached words her husband had sent their daughter. The grief clutched her first and then her fury swept through her. How could he do such a thing to her daughter? She would never forgive him. She would make him pay for every word the next time she saw him, for surely this had hurt Emma more having come at her request. Terra called for Sabin and her friends immediately, and she knew her anger could easily be seen. She wasn't trying to hide it.

The moment the burly man walked into the room with the others in tow, all confused as to their summons, Terra was shouting at him and cursing his foolish, cruel brother and the thick headed nature of the Figaro men. Locke went to detach her from Sabin's arms, for she was clawing at him, while Celes tried to calm her down.

Poor Sabin was horrified. "Terra, what in heavens did I do to deserve this?" he asked, rubbing at the scratches, more annoyed than hurt.

"Your brother is such awful person lately, I cannot stand it!"

Sabin's eyes widened, and Celes looked at Terra with alarm. Locke sputtered. No one had ever heard Terra utter cruel things toward her husband before. "Calm down for a minute and explain what this is all about Terra!" Without another sword, she shoved the letter toward him. He fumbled with it for a moment. "What is this?"

"Read it!" she snapped.

Sabin did as he was told, and not more than a few seconds into reading did he look at Terra with wide eyes. "Terra...this...there's no way this is from Edgar!"

Terra said, "There isn't? I explicitly asked him to write to her Sabin! That is his writing!" Celes tore the letter from the man's hands and read it aloud. Locke listened carefully without a word the entire time, but Terra covered her eyes and cried. Sabin tried to comfort her, but she shrugged him away.

Celes said, "It is certainly Edgar's writing." Sabin began to protest, but Celes cut him. "But the words are not his. I'm sure of it. Terra, calm down for just a moment and reread it. Does any of this sound like Edgar at all, regardless of the tone? The words themselves, the phrasing...it is all off."

Locke put in, "I agree. Even if I were to agree that Edgar could write a cruel letter to his own daughter—and I will never believe it—that didn't sound like Edgar whatsoever." he went to Terra's side, and took her hand. "Listen to me Terra, whoever wrote that letter, it is clear what their goal is. Just think about it. But you should know that your husband's wording is far more elegant than that, intelligent even. Trust in your husband Terra, you know he isn't a cruel man."

Terra was defeated, and looked at them pleadingly. "How can I believe it when it is written in his hand?" she asked them and they looked uncomfortable by it. "Tell me...how can I convince my daughter that her father didn't send such a cruel thing even after all their troubles?"

Celes shook her head. "We try our best to convince her, but I feel like we're missing the bigger issue." she looked at them. "Who crafted that forgery and what exactly was their purpose? We need to find it, and alert Edgar to it immediately."

••••••••••••

Cadence had spent the better part of the early day working to help Terra and the kingdom the best that she could. It wasn't grand, her efforts, but she hoped it was enough to relieve Terra of some pressure so she could focus more on her own family and health. When she retired to her residence, she was exhausted, but began supper. She knew her mother and father would b e in worse shape than herself, so she wished to provide for them. And her brother, who worked tirelessly at the academy and training, hoping to be of use. And for what reason? It was obvious to everyone, except the person it concerned.

By the time her parents and brother returned to the residence, the food was done and prepped on the table. Celes looked startled to see it, and then annoyed. She looked at Cadence with that look while her father searched over the food with a starved expression. "Cadence, how many times have I told you that you do not need to do this."

"You and father have been working without much rest since this war began," she said, guiding her mother to a chair, even as she pointed her brother to a spot. He thanked her with a smile before hurrying to his spot. "I do minimal tasks, exhausting certainly, but in comparison to your work? It is a leisurely walk against a marathon. I would gladly do this for you two."

"I don't like you tiring yourself out for our benefit," she said sternly.

"It is so good," her father mumbled over a mouthful of honeyed chicken and potatoes. Her brother was not far after him with similar compliments, though not through rather pigish behavior their mother might follow after with a smack of a spoon.

"Locke, you aren't helping!" she snapped.

"Just sit and relax," Cadence said, guiding her to a seat.

"What of you?" Jacen asked, frowning. "It feels wrong to share in this without."

"I will join you shortly if I can. I have had this worry in me all day. I must see the queen, to ask after Emma."

The room went cold with quiet, and Celes exchanged a quick look with her husband before looking at her daughter. "Cadence, I'm sorry to extend your worry, but you mustn't go over there right now. Emma just received some distressing news."

"What happened?"

Hesitating, Celes said, "Things related to the crown which must not be discussed openly."

Jacen made a face, realizing what she meant. "I get it. Not in front of me." he sighed. "I'll step out."

Cadence tried to stop him, but he lifted a hand. "No, no...it is alright. I understand, I do. I'm not involved in the intricacies of the crown, nor am I old enough to be considered among its politics, or trusted in the princess' difficulties. You three are involved, and mother thinks it is best whatever it is she has to tell you is kept quiet. I will respect that." he took his plate of food. "Good night father, mother." he smiled at Cadence before leaving.

When they were alone, Celes took a sip of the wine laid out for them, to relax herself, and explained the situation. Locke kept insisting that it wasn't Edgar, which Celes was certain of too though not due to any emotionally attachment Cadence was sure. It was never really about that with her mother. She was always about what made sense first above everything else. Of course Cadence knew her mother knew Edgar's character would never allow for such things.

Finally, Cadence sat down, speechless. Of all the things to pile onto the princess, sabotage against her relationship with her father? Could someone really be looking to do something like that? And who, and why? What sort of benefit could they get from it? And then finally she thought of poor Emma, and what she was feeling. Cadence felt so guilty. I pushed her to look for something...if I hadn't, she wouldn't have asked for a letter and this wouldn't have happened.

"I need to go see her," Cadence said quietly.

"We know you do," Locke said, setting aside his fork. "Just not tonight. Tomorrow you can go. Besides, your mother and I would feel better about you getting some rest first anyhow."

"That is true," her mother said. "Rest up and in the morning you can see her, provided her mother says that you may."

Cadence reluctantly did as she was bid, thought it was difficult. The worry kept her awake much of the night, and when sleep finally arrived for it, it was not restful. She knew it was her fault, that whatever this was—be the honest feelings of the king or the meddling of another—it would not have happened had Cadence not interfered.

I'm sorry Emma, she thought. I'm so sorry.

In the morning, Cadence waited for her parents to stir to see if they wished to accompany her, to see Terra, but they had checked in on their quarters to find they had already left. Her brother was nowhere to be seen, so she assumed he already left for his studies. She gathered up her courage, and her wits, and went onward.

The castle guard admitted her immediately, stating her parents already passed through an hour earlier to see the queen. He told her to see them in the solar. Cadence wasn't sure if delaying to see Emma was wise, but if the queen herself felt there was something to be said first, it must be important.

When she arrived, she found the queen, the king's brother and her parents waiting for her. "What is going on?" she asked as she closed the door. "I was just about to see Emma."

Terra gave her a smile. "I love that you are so concerned about my daughter Cadence. It is why I will always trust her with you."

Sabin looked at her with worried, tired eyes. "We called you here because of Emma," he said.

"I was told...the letter." she held back her tears. "It...it was cruel."

"And not my husband," Terra said. "I know this now, but it doesn't matter. The damage has been done. Emma believes it was from her father, and I cannot convince her otherwise. I have tried already and failed."

"So if this isn't about the letter or convincing her it wasn't from her father, what is this about?"

Terra said, "The secret we had you swear to all those years ago." realizing what she meant, Cadence wasn't sure what to say. "The things you were told about Emma...I'm sure Cambyses told you even more than he should have." Cadence felt ashamed, because he had, despite her attempts to decline his information.

"If this is about me keeping the secret...Terra, I swear as I did then. I will never do anything that would harm your daughter or your family."

"We know that," Sabin said, his smile soft, a bit frightened.

""It is time we tell you more," Terra said, gesturing to a seat. "If we do not...I fear we will risk everything, even my daughter." Terra started, albeit quietly, and sadly. "You already know of my heritage, and my children's heritage. You know about Emma's birth." Cadence knew it was a painful time for the queen. For weeks she stayed in and the kingdom feared for the unseen and unnamed princess, and then for weeks after it was fear of their daughter's failing health and the reception of the public. Terra had barely any rest.

"I understand Terra, she's...of esper blood."

"Yes, but...but there's a reason she's so different," she said, and Cadence could see the tears now. "More reasons than her just being sick..."

"For her Sand Fever?"

"Yes, but...but the real reason was because of her blood," she said.

Sabin elaborated. "Emma was born very...special. Her esper blood is strong, but unstable."

"Unstable?"

"It means she cannot transform whenever she wills it," Terra said. "Her emotions, or any form of stress, triggers the transformation."

Cadence always knew the girl was special in her own way, and even that she had been gifted the blood of her mother's powerful esperian bloodline, but she had never been told nor even suspected that the girl's problems had been that she was born unable to control them. She thought the girl was simply sick, sick with Sand Fever. Did that mean she wasn't sick? No, Cadence thought. I have seen her sick when she was a child, she thought, and she could recall the grief and fear in the monarchs' faces that she would perish.

Something occurred to her then. "Could her Sand Fever have done this to her?"

"It is the best answer that we have," Terra said, and the grief Cadence had since back then was back on that face. "My daughter's illness may play some part, or it could be the sole reason, or it could be that she is less of an esperian than I am, or...or even that she came to this world earlier than she should have. I'm not sure why, only that she cannot control it, and that if she loses herself to it, the world will tear her from my arms."

"I don't understand though...how did she not lose control all this time?" she looked at their faces. "If she cannot control her transformation, how did she go through her rape without transforming of all things?"

Terra, disturbed by her blunt words, weakly sought a seat, besieged by grief and guilt. Locke noticed and, feeling just as he always has the protector, rubbed at his neck and jumped in to explain. "Cadence...Emma wasn't sent to the island just for her illness."

"What do you mean?"

"For some time after Kefka was destroyed, we have...well we have known that Gua and Relm were capable of magicks, at least some strange form of it. Even when magic lived, theirs was something else entirely. It didn't die for them, if anything...it thrived."

Cadence could barely believe it. In all the world, two people had been bestowed magic and managed to keep it secret for so long? "How? And...and why did they keep it secret?"

"Why?" her mother asked. "Because for hundreds of years those with power were sought and experimented on, just for the chance to get similar power. When Gua and Relm told us what they could still do, we all decided they needed to keep it a secret. If not for their own good, for the good of the world. If anyone out there with a mind like the Empire heard of their exploits, they would seek them out and start that hunt again. We couldn't have it."

Cadence understood that, but she wanted to believe that the world had changed. That it was better than it was before through the suffering they endured under Kefka and the Empire, but she supposed it was childish to hope so. "Fine...but what does any of this have to do with Emma?"

"Relm's grandfather left her countless literature, thousands of years old," Celes said. "On various subjects of magical topics."

Terra stopped them from going forward by raising a hand. Celes asked her if she was sure, and the queen simply shook her head. "No. I'll never be sure I did the right thing sending her away, but what does it matter now? I cannot change the past." she sighed. "Relm had taken up her grandfather's studies. Gau had joined her, hoping to find out more about his unique abilities. They learned of so much, of Thamasa's ancient ties with the Espers, their people's rich roots with magic, ancient rituals and spells, seals and various other protective enchantments. Through reading, Relm was able to manifest her abilities in a greater fashion. The whole island knows of what she can do, and the whole island would die before they spoke of what she could do, they cherish her that much. Gau was not able to find out why he is able to do what he can do, but he has learned to control it better and learn its limits, and what's more, learn its roots as a cognate to magic itself. I am thankful that they found themselves through the ancient libraries of Thamasa, I am, but I am more thankful for what it gave me and my family years later when my daughter was born."

Terra took a moment to collect herself. "Emma's birth was difficult as you know, and her transformation was slow to revert, and even when it did, she would transform so quickly at a moment's notice when upset. Soon enough Edgar and I had to keep her within castle walls and out of sight, and make sure she wasn't upset whatsoever, in fear she would transform and never return to her human side. You know part of this already. It never occurred to us though that her Sand Fever would drive her into her transformations...and when she got sick, I would have gladly accepted it if she had just lived." Cadence saw that the queen was crying now. "She was dying, I just knew it, it was a punishment for failing at her birth and wishing that she was...was normal, just so the world would leave her be. The gods were angry at me, I knew it, so I told them I would give them anything they desired if they spared her."

Celes walked over to lay a hand on her shoulder. "Terra, listen to me...if there are gods, do you really believe them to be spiteful like that?"

"Vengeful against injustice? Yes!" she snapped. "I had begged for any way to have my daughter back and to test me, they gave me my daughter back from the doors of death, but she was stuck in her transformation. I didn't care though, as I truly never did. I was happy. I love her so much. But weeks went by and then months, and she didn't transform back, and the people once again wondered if she died. I wanted to show her to the world, but Edgar...he...he said they would hate her, fear her...maybe he was right...he is right about so much..." she dried her eyes with her hands. "I was feared back then, after all, so it wasn't something far fetched. It was what started the War of Magi, and the Empire's lust for power. And how could we take that chance with our daughter? Our little girl? She had already lost so much due to the Sand Fever, that she didn't deserve to lose anything else."

Cadence still could not see how this pointed to Thamasa or Relm and Gau, but it was clear that Terra had never stopped torturing herself for her decisions, decisions she very clearly had no choice but to make for the sake of her daughter.

"Terra, by the sound of it, you did only what you had to do. You said it yourself. The world is a dangerous, unforgiving and hateful place. How could you place your daughter in their hands without any evidence they would be accepting? You have told the tale of your journey to queen alone many times, the harshness you endured simply because of your hair...how could you trust the world with your daughter, especially if she were transformed?" Terra looked away. "You may think you did the wrong, or that the gods are disgusted by your actions and are punishing you for it, but they aren't. Emma was sick. Emma was given something the world fears. And you acted to protect her. If anything, the gods would respect you in giving up so much of your daughter just to protect her. To protect the secret."

"You're wrong," she cried. "How can the gods not hate me? I sent my daughter away, to have others seal her magicks away...to...to lie to her every day of her life about who she is and what happened to her? Even when her memories slipped away from her? To tell her she was on that island simply because she was sick, for years and years, when we tested to see if her seals were working enough to bring her to civilizations that couldn't understand her? I deserve the wrath of the gods Cadence...I should have been there with her, but I stayed here to appease the Council and try foolishly to make changes." by now, the queen had broken down completely. Celes rushed to her side immediately, taking her into a soothing hug.

Cadence was shocked to her core. So that was the tie to Thamasa. Relm had been sealing away Emma's magic, her transformation. "Terra, listen to yourself! You did what you had to do...is it painful? Of course, but you had no choice."

"Listen to her, Terra," Locke said. "You need to stop torturing yourself over this. You were given no choice. Thamasa was able to save your daughter, in more ways than one. You made a huge sacrifice in order to give her a chance."

"Then you understand," Sabin said softly. "The importance of sending Emma away, but you need to understand the risks of triggering a transformation."

"I don't understand," she said. "I thought you sealed it?"

"The seals have weakened," Sabin said. "We fear it started sometime after...after her rape, or maybe even some time before. We first noticed the signs then. The anger...the violent outbursts..."

"That has always been Emma, as far as I have known her though," Cadence tried, hoping just maybe they had it wrong.

Terra's softly smiled. "Yes. Emma's temperament has always been...difficult. It is one of the many reasons why I adore her so fiercely, but there is a difference to kicking at her brothers' legs when they pick on her and pummeling them and shredding them with a look in her eye that only displays rage."

Cadence could not argue with that. There was a distance between the two Emmas she saw in those moments of anger. The one that would turn red and shout for her father or mother to help her against her brothers was something so typical of a young girl, of a child, but what Cadence had seen that day in the halls against Benjamin had baffled and frightened her. Well, until now. Now she was afraid. Afraid for Emma.

"I have seen these signs before," Terra said. "I know what it means."

"Then you need to send her back to Thamasa immediately, right?" she asked them, feeling a dread creep into her. So now it was all starting to make sense. The gradual but steady incline in the girl's anger, Terra's continued refusal to push subjects with her beyond a point, and attempts to keep Benjamin away. The girl's magicks were slipping through. What could it mean for the girl if she transformed? If she hurt someone? Cadence knew she couldn't lose the poor girl, she had grown to love her like she was her own flesh and blood. "Well? Are you going to send her back or not?!"

"It is far too dangerous now to send her off. We have no idea whether or not the Roskovian have naval blockades between us, and even should we find a path be found that the scum have not occupied, what if Emma transforms midway? We would have no way of calming her or anything. We would be stuck in the middle of the ocean with an uncontrollable, untrained, angered, powerful esperian child surrounded by witless, frightened crew members."

"So you are you telling me we can do nothing?" she asked, feeling hopeless and terrified. "I don't accept that! What about Setzer's airships? Couldn't you fly her to Thamasa?"

"He has a total of three working aircrafts, two of which have been claimed and stationed by the Figaro Air Force, the last is still under repairs and is his personal airship. The others aren't even created yet." Sabin said gently when he saw that Cadence was crying.

"Then we really do nothing?" she snapped. "how can you be so...so nonchalant about it?! She is your niece!"

Sabin, ever so calm, said, "I fear for this more than you know Cadence, but I know panic solves nothing. Besides, we called you in here because until we figure out how to get her to Thamasa safely, we know a method of keeping her from transforming until then. We need to inform you of it."

"It isn't very accurate," Celes added. "But it is all that we have."

Terra said, "We must not let her get swept away by her emotions."

Startled by that, as she had guessed it earlier and assumed they would not rely on it, Cadence snorted with laughter, causing them to stare at her with annoyance and surprise. "Are you serious?" she asked them. "You are telling me that we have to avoid getting a, what was she again? A fourteen year old girl? Yes, that's right. A fourteen year old girl emotional? Oh, I'm sure that will be plenty easy, especially with how easily she feels things. Let us lock her up in a tower, that should do it. Oh, except...she will feel great sadness from that. That ought to make her transform. So let us think of something else, shall we? How about we pander to her needs? No, except that might make her too happy, and that might make her transform!"

"Cadence!" Celes howled. "Do not get flippant with us!"

"Oh, I'm sorry mother!" she snapped back. "Am I complaining too much to this idiocy?"

"What would you have us do then?" Terra asked her, neither upset or mocking, but desperate. "We cannot take her to the islands yet Cadence, and we know she cannot control it, nor risk the kingdom knowing. Tell me and I will do it."

"You need to take the risk of transporting her to Thamasa, Terra," she said. "You absolutely need to, even if she could transform. Do you not understand that she could hurt herself, or others? Even should she reveal herself to a few people, it is better than accidentally revealing herself to thousands and hurting them. You could deal with a small crew, but a kingdom? Send her to Thamasa before it is too late."

Terra looked at her brother-in-law, considering his opinion. For a moment he did or said nothing, but then he nodded. "I think she's right...we should have done it after her rape, but there was so much going on, and she needed you and Edgar so dearly it was out of the question."

Terra agreed quietly and then said, "Okay...okay. I will send a note to Hals to have him ready a ship for transport and two for escort in the morning. He will need to have time to chart a path, but I will insist its urgency." she paused and then shook her head. "Emma...she's...she's not going to understand."

Cadence knew what she meant. "She had wanted to go anyhow earlier," she said. "If you need an excuse, tell her that Figaro has become too dangerous for her or that her sickness has gotten worse. I have no doubt she will see it as a punishment no matter what, but her safety is more important, right?"

"Of course," Terra said, sniffing. "Of course it is..." she sat up. "I will go speak with her, tell her of her return to Thamasa."

Cadence stopped her. "Might I join you? I wish to see her, to know of how she fares."

Terra smiled at her. "You will always be welcomed at my daughter's side Cadence. I trust you with her wholly."

••••••••••••

They arrived at Emma's room at a leisurely pace, each unwilling to do what was needing to be done, but knowing it had to be done. Cadence knew Terra was a scene away from fleeing, so she kept a hand's distance away, to comfort her. When they were outside her door, they paused. Terra was trembling, and looked at her fearfully.

"I can't do this," she whispered. "I...I can't. Not again."

"Terra, you must," she insisted. "For her own good. I know it is painful, but you must be strong. Do you wish to lose her?" Cadence knew the wording was harsh, but it unfortunately was the only way to make her see this was the only way to save her daughter. Terra sighed and opened the door.

The princess had restored her room to its usual tidy order. The objects and images on the dresser and shelves were meticulously lined up, the bed so perfectly made there wasn't a crease in sight, the floor swept and moped so clean the marble reflected their presence back at them and hanging fresh on the walls were prayer bands, which she made often in her absence from the chapel.

Emma herself was not asleep, nor was she reading quietly on her bed, as she might usually be, instead she was on her balcony, sitting quietly and watching the gardens below. There was a bag of bird seed beside her, some of which had been spilled out. Though she did not move or speak to indicate she had heard them enter, they knew she heard them. She always did, lest she was asleep. Cadence stayed back some as Terra approached. There was still the issue of the false letter under Edgar's name, which Cadence was sure was going to make this even harder.

"Emma my dear," Terra called out softly, as she paused by the arch of the balcony. "Would you please come inside so we could talk?" when she would not answer her, Terra pushed a bit harder. "Please Emma, come inside." Cadence was sure the girl was ignoring her, but after a long consideration it seemed, Emma sighed and lifted herself up. When she neared, Terra took her into her arms and kissed her face all over, which the girl didn't even bother to protest. "Would you sit? We have something to talk about."

Terra waited until Emma sat herself on the edge of her bed before seating herself beside her. "This will be difficult to say, so let me start by telling you that it never was and never will be a punishment. I have never thought you did wrong Emma. I know you feel like your father and I only ever see fault in your actions but you couldn't be more wrong. You are more than perfect in our eyes...it is just we are more frightened than we are proud."

Recognition lit in her eyes. "What did I do wrong?"

Terra shook her head and took her hand. "You didn't do anything, I swear." she squeezed her daughter's hand and Cadence saw the hesitation. No Terra, you must tell her. It is for her own good...do not back down now. Tears slipped from her eyes. "When you were born, it was the happiest moment of my life. I had dreamed of you all of my life and never knew it until I held you in my arms. You were so small and fragile I feared even letting you out of my sight. I wouldn't even let your father or brothers near you without being by, but you were sick. So very sick and..." she took a deep breath. "There was nothing I could do with my love alone then, just as it is now that my love alone cannot protect you."

Emma took her hand away. "I...I don't understand."

"There are dangers here now Emma," she said, her voice raising, becoming stronger. "And I cannot protect you here. And with your illness, the task becomes too much. There is nothing here in Figaro or any soul that could provide assistance should you require it if a blockade goes up. I would have to watch you grow sicker and sicker...and I cannot."

"B-but I'm fine," Emma insisted fervently. "I'm fine!"

"For how long?" she asked, and Emma's eyes started to fill with tears. "For how long until you have another seizure? Until you fall into a coma? Until your fevers return? We have already pushed our luck the last few months without your check ups and—"

"You're s-s-sending me away again," she said, crying.

Terra tried to explain. "It is the only way to keep you safe, Emma."

"I'm safe here," she sniffed. "Please...please, I know I said I w-wanted to leave but...but I don't want to anymore. I don't want to leave."

"Emma, this isn't a punishment."

"It is! I know it is! Father's letter warned me..." she tried to wipe her tears away, to stop herself, but more fled from her. Cadence felt immensely uncomfortable. What could the truth do to the girl? Surely knowing why she had to go would help?

"This isn't about that damnable letter," Terra said, grabbing her daughter by the arms to pull her into a hug. "Even if it should be that your father set aside his affections for you, and I promise you that day will never come, I would never stop loving you. I only mean to protect you now."

"I p-promise I'm okay, I promise!"

"Emma, please, don't make this harder—"

"Please!" she cried, clinging to her mother. "Please! I can't leave, I can't...I don't want to be alone again."

For a long moment Cadence thought Terra would say nothing. She held her daughter, let her cry in her arms, looking as if there was something she wanted to say but knowing she could not. Cadence thought she was going to tell her daughter the truth, but the queen closed her eyes and held her daughter close to her. "I won't leave you again," she said loudly, and Cadence knew by her tone she meant every word of it. Terra was not abandoning her daughter again.

"Terra—" Cadence cut in, trying to reinforce the importance of Thamasa, but the queen continued.

"Emma, you must go back to Thamasa," she brushed tears from her daughter's eyes. "This much is true, but I won't send you off alone again. I will go with you. For however long you must be there, I will be by your side."

The princess' eyes widened and she drew back, startled. "W-What about F-Figaro?"

Terra brushed hair from her daughter's face. "You matter more to me than all else that graces this world, Emma. You always have." Emma hid her face in her mother's bosom, crying. Terra held her tightly, afraid to let go. Cadence looked away from their private moment.

After a long moment, Terra gently held her away and soothed her daughter's tears away. "I must go prepare our departure Emma, it is important we leave immediately to avoid blockades. I need you to pack only the essentials, things you cannot live without. Everything else we can have your uncle ship to Thamasa, do you understand?"

Emma nodded as she rubbed the back of her hand against her nose. Terra kissed her forehead. "Good. If things go well, we should depart in the morning. Cadence?" she looked over at the woman standing rather awkwardly aside. "Would you mind helping her pack? Heavens...I do ask so much of you."

Cadence laughed. "Nonsense, Terra. You ask so very little. I would be happy to help Emma."

Terra gave her daughter a kiss on the cheek once more before departing. Emma immediately sunk into her bed and let her grief go. Cadence wanted to do so much for her, but she knew there was nothing she could do, or say, to help her. Thamasa was a step back for her, she knew it, and going back meant feeling as if she was being put aside again, even should her mother go with her.

"Emma," Cadence said, hoping to stir her softly, to encourage her to start, but the girl only wept. "Please Emma, we do not have much time. If there is anything you wish to pack, tell me..."

Emma peeled herself from her bed to look at Cadence. "I don't want to leave C-Cadence...e-even if I'm sick..."

"You need to," she said, walking over. "You are..." she felt so wrong for the lie. "You are too sick Emma. If you do not do this...just please, help me pack."

"W-Will I get to s-say goodbye to everyone?" she sniffled as she rubbed at her eyes and got off the bed.

"I'm sure you will get your chance to," Cadence muttered. "I wouldn't imagine your mother letting you leave without it."

Emma was quiet for a moment, and then she said, "Will I be able to s-s-say goodbye to Alexander too?" she rubbed at her eyes again as Cadence thought frantically on an answer. Seeing Alexander was exactly the emotional kind of power she needed to avoid right now. "Cadence?" she mumbled, sniffling, even as she dug through her clothes. She found something that made her smile a bit, and held it up. "Do you t-think Alexander w-will like this c-color?"

"Honey, please...you need to stop this."

Confused, Emma looked at her with a frown. "S-Stop what?"

Damn how foolishly enchanted the girl was with Alexander, and how foolishly unaware she was of the idiot's lack of feelings. Feeling grossly pitiful and sad by the display, she wanted to beat the living hell out of Alexander. Damn you Alex...damn you for doing this to her! And now she was frustrated with herself for not stopping what had formed between them before it was too late, and a little angry with herself, Cadence snapped a bit at Emma. "What do you think? Why do you want to see him so bad all of the time?"

Emma was taken aback by the outburst and placed the blouse she had in her hands back down, fumbling over her own words. "I...I..."

"Emma, he's no good for you," she tried, a bit kinder, forgetting the tone, realizing her error and feeling terrible for it. "I'm worried about you. You don't know how these things work, not...not truly."

"You're wrong," she said. "He's kind to me and—and he's always here w-when I need him to be. He d-doesn't force me to talk, he doesn't force me to do things I don't want to do..." she mumbled, and Cadence could neither understand the strength it took for her to admit that or just how powerful it was for someone to be those things to her, or rather just how incredibly important Alexander had become to her.

"Emma, you can't think you like him just because he's kind to you," Cadence knew it would be a harsh reality, but she had to deter the girl. She had no idea what Alexander's true intentions were, or that there was no future between them. That heartbreak needed to be avoided, especially now. "What's more, you can't just like someone because they are nice to you."

"T-That's not w-w-what I said."

"That's what you said, that's what you meant," Cadence insisted. "You listed it as reasons."

"I-I was trying...trying..."

"What?"

"I was trying t-to prove he's...he's not a bad person," she cried. "He's not a bad person."

He may not be a bad person Emma...but you have no idea the lows he has stooped to, she thought pitifully. But I see it will take more to deter her. "Emma, I have known Alexander all his life. I know his person better than you." it was a bit harsh, but it needed to be said. The girl fumbled over some reply, but couldn't get it out. "It is true Alexander is not a bad person, but let me tell you the part of the man he doesn't show to you. I have tried so very hard to shelter you, to keep you from him, to avoid this very thing, but by the gods..." she sighed. "I see I cannot avoid it anymore."

"I don't care about w-what he did before."

"You should," she insisted. "Before you, there was Circe. And before Circe, there was Aspasia and before her there was Adelasia and Morena."

"Shut up!" Emma cried, covering her ears and pressing hard. "Please, just stop!"

"Let's not forget about Nadia and Tatiana. You think you are special to Alexander? He was sweet to Tatiana too, but when he got what he wanted from her, he left her behind in Tzen."

Emma started to cry. "Why are you doing this?" she asked, trembling. "You...you don't think I know I'm—I'm not special? I a-already know I'm not...but when he looks at me...when he's around...I...I don't feel like...like I'm slipping away. Like I mean nothing."

"That's the problem Emma," she snapped. "You are special! And if he doesn't feel like you are special, that you are the only girl he needs, then he is no good for you. I'm trying to make you understand that."

"I'm tired of everyone telling me what to do, what to say, what to feel!" she snapped back, and Cadence recognized that anger immediately.

"That's not what I'm trying to do Emma, I just want you to know—"

"Enough!" she howled. "You don't e-even know how he feels! I don't care what you have to say!"

That was it. It hit the wall. Cadence knew there was only one way to keep Emma from seeing Alexander now, though she knew it was going to destroy her little heart. But if she kept pursuing him she would be crushed, and that emotion might shift her into a frenzy. To know you had been dragged around, made to believe you mattered more than you actually did, was the worst.

Damn you Alexander...damn you for putting me in this position.

"You can't see him anymore," she said finally, sternly. "And...and that's final Emma."

Emma looked at her for the longest moment, trying to understand, until at last she seemed to understand the insinuation. "You...you w-wouldn't..."

"If you refuse to listen, I will have to," Cadence said, watching as Emma's eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry Emma, but you leave me no choice."

With a sudden act of defiance and courage, Emma's eyes narrowed. "Fine. Go tell mother! I don't care anymore! If you don't tell, I still can't see him. If you tell I still can't see him, but when you leave here to tell...I will go to see him!"

"You know what Emma...fine!" she shouted. "I was trying to avoid this...I love you so much I didn't want you to be hurt...but you are so stubborn!" she took a breath. "Alexander doesn't like you!"

Emma's anger had vanished instantly. In place of that anger, her eyes widened and she ran pale. She began to twist her fingers through each other. "That's...that's not..."

"He...he told me himself." after a moment of silence, Cadence knew she had gone about that wrong and tried to reach for the girl, but Emma stepped away, tears in her eyes. "I'm so sorry Emma, I'm so sorry...he didn't mean to mislead you, truly, and what happened between you...that was a mistake, he knows it, and that's why he has been avoiding you, to give you space and to avoid repeating the mistake." Emma looked at her suddenly, and Cadence grimaced. Emma hadn't been aware that it was "avoiding" to begin with. Damn it, she thought. "Please, you have to understand...it doesn't mean he hates you or doesn't wish to be your friend, he just doesn't...love you."

Emma started to cry. "I've been s-such an idiot..."

"No, no, don't say that Emma," Cadence reached for her hand, but the girl stepped back again. "Please, I'm so sorry, I...I was just trying to...I don't know, I thought I could avoid this...I'm so sorry."

"Just go," she said, looking away.

"Emma, let me explain, please."

"I want to be alone, please just go."

Cadence hesitated. "If you want to talk..." but Emma did not look at her, and Cadence knew a piece of the girl had broke. She turned and left the girl alone.

••••••••••••

When Cadence arrived back her family's residence, there was nothing in her heart but turmoil, and regret. There had to have been another way she could have told Emma, but the girl was not letting there be any other way. That fierce emotion in her had already bloomed well beyond adoration. It had blossomed into love. And Cadence couldn't let her tell Alexander and be told the truth about the young man's actions. And yet she still felt horrible. She could have calmed the girl down first, sat her down and talked to her about love and life, and then slowly inched the subject to Alexander and how he had confided in her about his true feelings. But would Emma have taken it any better that the man she had trusted her heart with, after everything, didn't love her simply because the truth had been given to her in sweeter words, and not even from the man himself?

I have messed this up so bad, she thought as she walked through the main room. Her father was scribbling something onto a parchment by the fireplace, distracted. Gods, what have I done...

Noticing her at last, her father looked up. "Cadence, you're back. I thought you would be away longer, to be honest. Where's your mother?"

Cadence was disoriented. "I...I..."

Her father immediately rose. "Cadence, what's wrong?" it was then that she noticed she was crying. "What happened?"

"I've...I've done something horrible, father," she cried. "And Emma...gods..."

He was at her side then, embracing her gently. "It is okay, breathe, breathe. That's it. Now sit down and tell me what happened." when she was seated, he asked her what she meant as he took a seat across from her.

"I can't help Emma father, and today when I tried my hardest to help her avoid something that would hurt her I just ended up causing her the same sort of pain I was trying to make her avoid." she brushed tears away. "I cannot help her or anyone for that matter. I'm useless."

Locke laughed at that. "You are your mother's daughter. If anyone can help anyone, it is you. Besides," he leaned back into his chair. "Think about what you have done and tell me you don't think you can help her. Who else has been able to reach her in this time? To comfort her when she denies all else? To make her see reason, or make her laugh or have some happiness in her dark days?"

Cadence's first thoughts were of Alexander, and it startled her. Every time something happened, it was Alexander Emma sought solace in. Every time she wanted to share something good with another, the first name out of Emma's mouth was Alexander's. The name that brought a smile to her face was the eldest Gabbiani boy's name. And he had become such a positive anchor in her life it seemed unnatural for her, now that Cadence thought on it, not to fall for him.

Why couldn't things have turned out differently? Why couldn't have Alexander also have been a shy, inexperienced boy who had paid her attention, who had stolen hers? Things would be so much simpler if Alexander wasn't such a lecherous hound. With a sigh, she looked at her father. "I'm not the first person she thinks of for comfort father," there was some humor to her voice. He looked at her, confused. "She believes she's fallen in love, and with Alexander Gabbiani of all people."

Locke's eyes widened. "That buffoon? Gods, but he's just another Edgar!"

Cadence laughed. "That's an insult to Edgar, to be honest." she felt so exhausted. "He's not good for her anyhow, even if they had tried."

"Why not?" he asked, and then laughed when she gave him that look. "Well, I mean...okay he's a hound dog, but Edgar was too in much of the same way. Terra had made him into a better man. You didn't see the effect she had on him. He was writing letters to her every week to see how she faired in Mobliz, sending gil and supplies just to have the excuse to keep in contact...love can change a person, Cadence."

"That's the problem," she muttered. "Alexander doesn't love her, and he won't change. Not for anyone."

Locke looked alarmed at that. "He told you this? That he doesn't love her?" she nodded. "I see..." he let the quiet linger for a moment. "The poor girl." he rubbed at his neck. "You know...if you think about it...you'd think he loves her, the way he doted on her all of the time. Except I haven't seen him around much lately, guess he's grown bored. Damn pigs."

Cadence looked at him quickly, as if startled. "What do you mean by 'the way he doted on her'?"

"I thought it was obvious, especially to you since you are always around her and Alexander, but it just seemed like he was constantly making excuses to see her. I mean even Setzer chewed my ear off enough about the lack of work the lad had been doing, demanded I tell Terra to send him away if he came prowling about, but how could I have asked Terra to send away the one thing that was making her daughter happy?"

Making excuses... she had thought of all the times Alexander had excused himself from work, had done the impossible just to please Emma, sometimes even just to catch a momentarily glimpse of her, and something clicked. Not once had she seen him do something like that for another girl. A few flowers and shallow promises were the extent of his romantic displays before, but the extent he went through for Emma had come rushing to her like a tsunami. How could she have not noticed it? The signs were so obvious, often more obvious than they were for Emma!

"Gods," she whispered aloud. Her father arched a brow at her as he reached for an apple on the table. "That fool...he's in love with her."

Locke laughed. "I guess there's something about Terra's genes that tames hound dogs, eh?" he bit into the apple with a smirk.

Cadence rolled her eyes and got to her feet. "I have to see him, he needs to know she's leaving."

"Right now?" he mumbled. "Gonna be impossible, love. He's not here right now. He and his father left for South Figaro to gather more supplies. Celes said they should be back by the morning, though."

Cadence leaned over the table to hug her father and kiss his cheek. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" and then she hurried off to her quarters, leaving her father a bit startled. If she were to confront Alexander on his feelings, she needed to do so very cleanly. He wasn't going to admit it himself, she knew it. It would take some shoving.

---

The end of this chapter remake. I have an announcement to make. As of today, July 26th 2019, I no longer have any beta readers or writers. That has been part of the reason for such huge delays between chapter updates and chapter releases, but another is...well...life. However, I'm trying my best to put more time towards the story. This one took longer because it was...60k. And I had to edit it as well. I have poor eyes! lol if you spot any grammar errors or anything, please, message them to me so that I may edit them. I spent a week going over this thing, and then another after staying away for a week to get a fresh eye, but I just bet I missed some! So, any help is appreciated. :)

Anyhow, thank you so very dearly for reading as always, I love your continued support! It means the world to me! :)