this is me trying
chapter twenty-nine: wedding part 2
tatum
My eyes scan the decorative room filled with people mingling. There are so many people from the reservation here. My family. Seth's family. Our friends.
I allow myself to take it all in as I reflect on a few months ago. When I first arrived back in La Push, I was so lost and so incredibly lonely. I felt that I had no one in my corner. But now I couldn't help the small smile that took over my lips as I watch Seth talking with my parents and Sue.
His eyes catch mine even though I am across the room from him. A megawatt smile takes over his lips when our eyes meet. "I love you." He mouths to me before going back to his conversation with his mom and my parents.
Butterflies flutter around in my stomach at the words. I remember several days ago when the words brought me to tears and not the good kind. But since that night, Seth and his love for me has only continued to grow. I could see it so perfectly through his actions. It only made my feelings for him clearer.
"I wouldn't be surprised if you two were next." I hear Vanessa say, thoroughly snapping me out of my daze.
I look over to my friend and nearly laugh out loud when I see what she is wearing. Vanessa in a dress? I never thought I would see the day. "The next to what?" I question, avoiding the topic of her wearing a dress. I know that it would upset her.
"Get engaged… Get married…" Vanessa says as she motions to Brady and Laura who are dancing on the dance floor.
I open my mouth to say something but I couldn't think of anything to say. "I completely agree." Nessie joins in, resting an arm on my shoulder.
"I haven't even told Seth how I really feel." I whisper, ashamed. My eyes glance over to Seth again, meeting eye contact momentarily, before I look back to my friends.
"Well, there is no better time than the present." Nessie grins as she looks over to Seth who is currently heading our way. I blush as I see the look that Seth is giving me.
"We will leave you two to it." Vanessa laughs as she pulls Nessie away with her.
"What are those two up to?" Seth chuckles as he watches the two head to the dance floor.
I ignore his question and instead take in the sight of my handsome boyfriend. "Do you want to dance?" I ask quietly as a slow song takes over. I want to feel Seth's hands on me. I want to be in Seth's arms. I truly didn't want anything more.
"Of course." Seth answers, taking my hand and intertwining our fingers. He leads up to the dance floor where couples begin slow dancing.
When we reach the dance floor, Seth twirls me around before settling his hands on my waist. I quickly rest my arms on his shoulders. Our eyes meet once again and I feel my breath get taken away. How did I get so lucky? Out of everyone here tonight, Seth is dancing with me. He is my date tonight. My boyfriend.
A smirk toys on Seth's lips before he leans down to press his lips to my forehead. "How did I get so lucky?" He asks, taking the words right out of my mouth. "You are drop dead gorgeous tonight." He says as his fingers brush the silky fabric of the dress at my waist. "I truly can't take my eyes off of you." He whispers in amazement as he takes in my appearance once again. "I can't believe I get to be your date."
A blush settles on my cheeks as I rest a hand on his cheek. "You are more than my date." I remind him. "You are my boyfriend. And I am so lucky to have you."
Seth turns his face to press a kiss into my palm. "I love you so much." Seth says, holding my gaze. His chocolate eyes hold so much sincerity in them. I know with that look that he would do anything for me. Jump in front of a bullet for me. And I would do the same for him. Without any hesitation.
"I am-" I begin my confession but am instantly cut off by a voice on the microphone.
"Okay single ladies! It's time to get on the dance floor for the bouquet toss." The voice says before Beyonce's Single Ladies song blares through the speakers completely ruining the moment between Seth and I.
"You need to get out there." Nessie says, further interrupting the moment by separating me from Seth. "Get out there with Vanessa and catch the damn thing." She teased with a wide grin on her face.
I watch as a group of single women and girls gather on the dance floor behind Laura. In moments Laura throws back her bouquet and it lands in the hands of someone that I didn't recognize. I am somewhat glad that it didn't land in my hands because I didn't want the attention. But part of me is sad that fate didn't choose me.
As I exit the dance floor to find my boyfriend and get back to the moment that we were just having, I run into my mom and Sue. "Sweetheart, you look just darling tonight." My mom says as she wraps me up in her arms. "You need to look at this picture that Sue took of you and Seth dancing." She says motioning for Sue's phone.
And there on Sue's phone is a perfectly captured picture of Seth and I. Our eyes are interlocked and the sexual tension between us is nearly palpable. I look away from the screen, quickly scanning the room for Seth but am unsuccessful. "I need to get a picture of your family!" Sue cheers as she grabs my father's attention who is with Charlie, most likely talking sports.
I settle in between my parents as Sue takes a picture. "Oh Seth, join us!" My mom calls out. I look over to my boyfriend who follows my mother's instructions and settles behind me, wrapping an arm around my waist. My grin widens for the picture being in Seth's arms.
"I think your dad and I are going to head out in a few minutes." My mom says after the pictures. "We are getting too old for all this celebration." She says with a laugh.
"You are not too old." I assure her, clutching Seth's arm. "But I understand." We said quick goodbyes to my parents as well as Sue and Charlie as they are heading out too.
Seth swiftly pulls me back to the dance floor as his friends begin passing around a bottle of fireball. "Your turn, man." Collin slurs, nearly throwing the bottle Seth's way.
Seth gracefully catches the bottle before it falls to the floor and takes a swig of the liquor. "Want some, baby?" Seth asks, holding out the bottle.
I take the bottle from him and take a large swig. I need the liquid encouragement. I cringe as the alcohol burns its way down my throat. Seth chuckles as he passes the bottle off to someone else. He gathers me in his arms and tilts my chin up until my lips connect with his. I barely have time to swallow all of the alcohol before Seth's tongue is in my mouth.
My fingers thread themselves in Seth's thick dark hair as I open my mouth to Seth and his invasive tongue. The sound of the music around us seems to evaporate as I become engrossed with Seth. Seth's grip on my waist tightens possessively and a soft gasp leaves my lips.
The moment is once again ruined as someone bumps into me, splashing liquid all down my dress. I reflexively gasp as my dress is now soaked. "Hey, watch it." Seth growls to a younger teen who I have seen with his group of friends before.
"Hey, Seth. Man, I'm really sorry Tatum, I didn't mean to." The kid slurs before another guy that I barely recognized comes up.
"Clearly, Tyler's had a little too much to drink. I think it's time for me to get you home." The guy says before ushering the kid off the dance floor.
Seth and I look down at my liquid stained dress inspecting the damage. "I'm so so-" Seth starts.
I press a kiss to his lips. "It's okay." I assure him. "It's not going to hurt anything. But I am going to dry off in the bathroom really quickly." I say as I reach up on my tip toes and press a quick kiss to Seth's lips. "I will be right back." I mutter against his lips. With one last kiss, I head towards the bathroom.
As I open the bathroom door, I run into an older lady on her way out and then I am greeted with a familiar face. "Embry?" I laugh. "What are you doing in the women's bathroom?"
Embry just waves me off as he follows the older woman out. "Was that Embry?" Nessie questions confused as I gather some paper towels and begin dabbing at my wet dress.
"I guess so." I chuckle. Nessie grabs some paper towels as well and attempts to help me. "I don't think this is going to come out." I say after a few minutes of trying.
"I can't believe Tyler is so sloppy." Nessie grumbles as frowns. "You still look beautiful." She assures me.
I peek up in the mirror. The stain is definitely noticeable. But I honestly couldn't care. I just wanted to head back out to Seth and enjoy our time here. "Thank you for trying to help me." I smile at my best friend.
"That's what best friends are for." Nessie says as she pulls me in for a hug. "Oh, also. I forgot to ask you. Seth is patrolling tonight, right?" I nod my head as I recall my conversation with Seth last night. "Jake is patrolling with him. So you should come over. We can have a girls night or a slumber party." Nessie's eyes glow with excitement. I couldn't say no to her.
"Sure, I will have Seth drop me off at your place on his way to his shift." I say as we both head out of the bathroom and back to our men.
Seth frowns when he notices my dress. "Is it stained?" He questions.
I nod. "It appears so."
"I'm gonna kill that kid." Seth grumbles under his breath as I take his hands in mine.
"It's just a dress." I giggle as I purposely place his hands on my waist. "It's not going to ruin our night." I pull Seth's face to mine and press our lips together. I pull back and take in the sight of Seth's face. A smile takes over as my thumbs brush Seth's cheeks. "I don't deserve you." I whisper.
Even with the loud blaring music, Seth is still able to hear me. "I don't deserve you." He says with sincere honesty.
Thankfully a slow Taylor Swift song begins to play and Seth swiftly leads in a slow dance, completely blending us in with the other couples. Our intimacy is covered up. Seth twirls me in tune with the song and my back rests against his chest with our arms crossed in front of me. The words of Taylor Swift and the new close contact causes my heart to soar. I am breathless as my emotions crash over me like a strong wave.
I sink further into Seth's chest, soaking in this feeling and enjoying his warmth. I am so in love with this man. The thought brings tears to my eyes.
Seth spins me back around to face him and his face drops when he sees my eyes glossy with tears. Before he even gets a chance to speak, I open my mouth. "I love you." My voice is so vulnerable and shaky. But I have never been so sure of anything in my whole life. "I'm so in love with you." I choke on my tears. "I can't imagine a day without you. And that's so fucking terrifying because I truly can't go on if I lose you. I can't lose you, Seth."
Seth's hands cradle my face. "You aren't going to lose me, baby." His voice is so calming but it doesn't stop the tears.
"You don't know that." I choke out. "I never thought I would lose my brother but I did. I can't lose you, Seth. I can't. I love you so much. You are it for me. You are the only one I will be in love with for the rest of my life."
Seth's forehead presses against mine. "We are in this together." His hot breath fans across my face. "I will fight with every ounce of my being to be with you. Until my dying breath."
His lips consume mine. I forget that we are standing in the middle of a dance floor until Seth pulls away and laughs under his breath. "We should probably head out. Go somewhere more private." The intense look of desire in Seth's eyes makes me weak in my knees.
We don't even bother saying goodbye to anyone as we all but race to Seth's truck. I giggle as Seth picks me up instead of opening the passenger side door like he usually does. "I love you." He grins.
"I love you." I answer.
Seth kisses me passionately, pressing my back against the truck door as I awkwardly wrap my legs around Seth's waist despite my long dress. Seth's fingers brush down the bare exposed skin at my back. I instantly need more. We suddenly have too much clothes on. But I know this isn't the right setting.
"Take me home." I gasp breathlessly as Seth's mouth trails down my neck.
Seth follows my instructions and lifts me into the passenger seat before running over to the driver's side. I giggle like a love sick fool as I kick off my heels that were cutting into my skin and cuddle into Seth's side.
Seth rests his right hand on my covered thigh as I pepper kisses on the side of his face. "You are killing me." Seth's voice is husky. "Your place or mine?" He questions.
"Whatever is closer." I answer impatiently. I move Seth's hand to my bare thigh, wanting to feel his warmth skin to skin. Seth's thumb lightly rubs on the inside of my thigh, causing my core to tighten. "Seth." I choke out as his hand inches its way higher. "Please."
Seth moves his hand up my leg and brushes his fingers against the fabric of my underwear. I reflexively grab his arm and gasp as I sag against him. Seth goes to remove his hand, but I don't release my grip on his forearm. "Are you sure?" Seth's voice is nearly hoarse with desire.
I nod my head, breathless. I feel Seth move my panties to the side before his fingers meet contact with my skin.
Seth groans. "God, baby. You are so wet." He chokes out, stopping at a red light. He leans over and presses his lips to mine. He slips a finger inside me and I gasp into his mouth.
A car honks behind us, snapping us out of our trance. Seth pulls his lips from mine and focuses on the road, but his finger remains in me as he continues his tease.
Gasps slip through my lips as Seth continues to move his finger and rub the bundle of nerves with his thumb. I wither in ecstasy as Seth adds a second finger. I quickly reach my climax, moaning Seth's name as waves of pleasure crash over me.
"Come on, T." Seth whispers as he pulls me across the bench seat of his truck. I still tremble from my orgasm as Seth picks me up and carries me into my house. I hadn't even realized that we made it home.
Seth unlocks the door with ease as I finally get out of my orgasmic haze. I press open mouth kisses along Seth's neck as he continues our journey to my bedroom.
Seth sets me on my soft bed and I look up at my boyfriend with a grin adorning my face. "Tatum, you don't understand how beautiful you are when you come." Seth says as he strips off his jacket and tie.
I lean up on my elbows. "I'm sure not as gorgeous as you." I say as I sit up completely and rise to my feet. I fumble with Seth's belt as Seth's hands go to the back of my dress. Seth's hands slide down the curves of my shoulders, pulling the straps of my dress along with him. I kneel on the ground before Seth as my dress becomes a puddle around me and unzip Seth's dress pants.
I don't know where this boost of confidence comes from, but kneeling in front of Seth in just a pair of panties, I feel on top of the world. And Seth looks at me like I am his entire world.
I refocus my attention on Seth's bulge. Okay, okay. I can do this. It's just a blow job. It seems easy enough. I coach myself.
Seth's hands cup my cheeks, running his thumbs along my cheekbones. "I'm not going to last long." Seth breathes out as I tug his erection out of his boxers. I can do this, I remind myself one last time. I lick my lips before taking him into my mouth. "God, Tatum." Seth groans out, weaving his fingers in my hair. I nearly choke before I pull back. Okay, too much. Let me take this a bit slower.
I twist my hands along his length, not fully grasping how big he is. I sink back down on him, earning a moan from my boyfriend. Unlike what Seth had said, he lasts longer than I thought he would. He comes right on my tongue as I look up at his face through my eyelashes. I must have done something right.
Seth quickly bends down and scoops me up after riding out his high. He playfully throws me onto the bed. He tugs off his shirt and removes his pants before climbing up on the bed after me. I feel like I have too much clothes on with just my panties as I watch Seth's naked form. Seth quickly fixes that as he hooks his fingers on the sides and slides them off. His fingers run along my skin, igniting a fire along my skin.
Seth sits up on his knees and I instantly speak up. "You don't need a condom." I whisper, staring up at him. "I have an IUD… Unless you-"
"Oh thank god." Seth says as he presses his lips to me. "Please tell me if I hurt you." Seth whispers as his hot breath tickles my cheek. "I couldn't bear hurting you."
I hold his eye contact. "Seth, baby. You could never hurt me." I assure him. "I promise."
Seth nods as he lines himself at my entrance. "I love you." Seth mumbles as he slowly sinks in.
I unconsciously dig my nails into Seth's back as Seth continues to slide into me. "Oh fuck, Seth." I gasp out as I feel him completely stretch me.
"Are you okay?" Seth asks, breathless. Concern taking over and overriding his pleasure.
"Yes, god yes." I say, tilting my hips up to him.
Seth fully pushes in and a moan slips through both of our lips. Seth looks down at me, studying me as he brushes back my hair. "No pain?" He asks once again.
"It feels good." I pant out, rocking my hips instinctively. I need him closer, deeper.
"Yeah?" Seth asks huskily. He begins rocking into me at a constant rate. I nod frantically in return, losing my ability to form words. Seth's hand removes one of mine from his back and interlaces our fingers. He peppers my face and neck and any skin that he can reach with open mouth kisses as his rhythm speeds up. I feel myself building up to my peak. "You're my everything, T." Seth whispers against the skin of my cheek.
"Seth." I whimper as I feel my toes curl. My head is fuzzy from all of this pleasure and I can't fully express how I feel.
"I know, baby." Seth whispers. "Come for me. Come with me."
That's all it took for me. Waves of pleasure for the second time tonight come crashing down around me. My body tingles from my head to my toes.
Seth presses his lips to mine, bringing me back to reality. "I love you." He whispers against my lips.
"I love you." I whisper out of breath.
Seth kisses me before slipping out of me. I instantly feel so empty without him. Seth lies beside me and I curl up next to him with my head resting on his chest. His heart beats strong and steady in my ear. Seth's fingers trace up and down my naked back absentmindedly.
I am overcome with emotions as I let the post-sex bliss fall over me. Love being at the forefront. I feel so connected and so so so in love with Seth.
"I wish you didn't have to leave." I mumble after we both catch our breath.
"I would stay here forever with you, T, if I could." Seth responds.
And even though we soon have to get up and put our clothes back on to leave, I am satisfied with Seth's response. I am beyond satisfied with tonight. And I feel on cloud nine.
Someone play About Damn Time by Lizzo! I have a million and one excuses for why it took so long but I am not going to list them. I hope you all enjoy this chapter! Next chapter is where shit hits the fan and I can't wait to post it! Not sure if anyone will still be reading this haha But if you are, let me know what you think! xx M