Chapter 70

October 2nd

I hear the door creak open and I swivel in my chair, straw from my fruity drink still in my mouth. The Chief smiles at me, Mogi trailing behind him. I give a small wave as Matsuda stands to address them.

"Chief! And Mogi too, welcome back. Things are going great here! And thanks to Light and Suzuki, we've determined that Kira maybe connected to the Yotsuba group!" Matsuda moves closer and ushers them to sit but the Chief's shock is written all over his face.

"Yotsuba?!"

"Y-yeah…"

"That must be it, well done." I'm a bit confused and Ryuzaki turns to look at the Chief, interested. "I just heard from the Director that Kira has started bribing politicians." Aizawa stands.

"Bribes? Is he using Yotsubas money?" He can't wrap his head around it but Matsuda accepts the idea immediately.

"Wow all of this must be connected. No wonder why you looked so serious when you came in, Chief!"

Aizawa makes his way over to the Chief, Mogi, and Matsuda while I watch. "That should aid our request to seek applicants to join the investigation, right? Did the Director get approval?" Aizawa asks and it surprises me.

I wasn't even aware we were looking for help.

"No, it's the opposite actually. The police are backing out. They've officially given up." His words shock me, and I rest my drink on my leg. Light jumps from his chair and Matsuda and Aizawa are both equally baffled, but the Chief continues. "I've talked it over with Mogi, and he seems determined to remain here." The mountain of a man nods.

I don't really know much about Mogi other than he's a hard worker and he very rarely speaks…

The Chief gives Aizawa and Matsuda a determined look. "If you want to continue going after Kira…you need to join Mogi and I and resign from the NPA." Both men gasp audibly, and I don't blame them. The Chief goes on. "We're no longer able to seriously work on this case as police officers."

"What do you mean, Chief?" With a family to support Aizawa and him have the most to lose.

"Yeah…aren't we working this case because we're the police?" Matsuda, as usual, asks the obvious question, but also the one everyone's thinking.

I'm safe, Ryuzaki bought my contract from my old boss and he's the one who writes my checks, but the Chief, Matsuda, Aizawa, and Mogi…they're police officers first…Task Force second.

The Chief looks at the floor, frustrated. "It's simple. I was told we would be fired if we continued to work with L. They may have been threatened by Kira, but that's a decision from the top."

"But Chief, do you really intend to quit?" Matsuda's in shock, but a man like the Chief, who respects honor, I don't see him giving up or quitting this case anytime soon.

"Yes, Matsuda. In a few hours I will no longer be the Chief. Each of you has your own life…Take your time to decide. We aren't just risking our lives anymore…"

"Yeah…especially if you have kids…" I know Matsuda's just thinking out loud, but sometimes I wish he wouldn't…Aizawa is visibly shaken by all this news and Matsuda stating the obvious is only making it worse.

"I think you should all go back to the police." Ryuzaki's voice cuts through the tension like a knife. "I was alone when all this started until Suzuki joined me. Then when almost every police officer turned their backs on me, when the threat of losing their lives became reality, it was her who stood beside me. With all of the support you've given me thus far…I think her and I will be able to continue this case by ourselves…and I swear, I'll return to you one day with Kira's head. You've risked your lives…you don't need to give up your livelihood too…" I look at Ryuzaki and sip my drink.

Underneath it all he really cares, doesn't he?

Light rattles the chain. "Don't forget Ryuzaki, because of this-" He moves his hand, rattling the chain once more. "I'll be with you guys too." Ryuzaki nods.

"That's right, you'll be with me until we catch Kira…" He turns around to the others and I notice for the first time that he has a bowl of cherries in front of him, along with his tea and a bowl of sugar cubes. He gives the others a brief look before picking the bowl up and pulling apart another bowl, probably for the seeds.

"Ryuzaki you're the one who said you'd need the help of the police for this case." The Chief seems surprised that Ryuzaki would just dismiss them like that.

"I did, but that's because with you guys, I could maintain a connection to the police. And I figured it would be beneficial to have an organization backing me up. Like during the Sakura T.V. incident…" He picks up twin cherries and puts the whole thing in his mouth. "But if the police have given up and decided not to catch Kira…then forget about it…"

The Chief takes a step forward, ready to plead his case. "It's true that If we quit the police force, we won't be of as much use to you but…what about our feelings? Our duty? We've come this far, risking out lives everyday and you just want us to go back to the police as though our sacrifice has been for nothing? All that time and effort, wasted? Whether we quit the police and pursue Kira or return to them and give up; I think at the very least, after everything we've been through, we deserve to make that decision for ourselves."

Ryuzaki pulls the stem out of his mouth and I'm shocked to see that it's tied. There's an old saying that if you can tie a cherry stem with your tongue that you're a good kisser…now I can say it's true. My face starts to heat up as I recall some of our more passionate moments; Light looks at me and notices Ryuzaki and the cherry stem, looks back at me and raises an eyebrow. I feel my face go a few shades darker. He's a smart kid, I'm sure he knows the old saying too. No one else seems to notice, they're too busy deciding the fate of their jobs, or at least if they do notice, they don't say anything.

"You're right." Ryuzaki sets the stem in the bowl then spits out a seed. "Then please choose." I turn to the Task Force and focus on Aizawa.

He looks conflicted, and that's putting it mildly. I know Mogi and the Chief have already decided to quit the police and I have a feeling that Matsuda will follow, but Aizawa…

"But Chief…Frankly if we quit the force, then we're unemployed…even if we do catch Kira, what about the future?" Aizawa clearly doesn't know what to do.

"As Matsuda said…you and I have families…I just don't know if I can sacrifice them for…" He trails off and the Chief scoffs.

"The future, huh? I haven't really thought about it…after we catch Kira…" He pauses for a moment then smiles at his team. "Well, when the time comes, I guess I'll have to dust off my resume." They stare at him and I sip my drink, emptying it, my straw making a sound in protest.

Matsuda's the first to break the silence, no surprise. "Alright! I've made up my mind! I'm gonna quit the police and go after Kira with you Chief!" He looks back at me then to them and makes hand gestures as he talks. "We finally have a lead thanks to Light and Suzuki, and if I leave, I might not see Suzuki ever again. I don't wanna quit now while we have a chance, I wanna see this through and when this is all over, we can go out for drinks like real friends do. I also still have my job as Misa-Misa's manager, so it's not like I'll really be unemployed. I only got this job thanks to connections anyway, my dad will be disappointed, but who cares as long as we catch Kira. Besides it would be pathetic to quit before we do-" I slam my empty cup on the desk and quickly uncross my legs jolting forward.

"Matsuda!" The Chief and I yell his name in unison.

"Matsuda, watch your mouth." The Chief scolds him and he looks confused, but you can actually see the moment he realizes what he's done, then he just looks like a sad puppy.

"Aizawa…I didn't mean…I'm sorry…" He tries to make it better but Aizawa looks at the floor and I can see the wheels turning. He takes a moment before turning to Ryuzaki who is still tying cherry stems.

Is he trying to tease me or just playing with his food?

"Ryuzaki…" Aizawa starts but is unsure of himself. "How about I return to the police but help you out in my free time. On my days off I could-"

"No good." Ryuzaki interrupts him. "Not only will you be fired anyway if they find out you're working with me, but if you decide to go back please don't return. With the current situation, I have to assume the higher ups have been bribed and anyone with the police is the enemy…" He ties another stem and glances at me, making me fidget in my chair.

"Come on…Whether I'm here or with the police, you know I'd never reveal our secrets…" He pauses looking down. He wants to help so badly, but it's looking like that won't be possible. "No…you're right. The others would only see me as L's spy…But what if I did go back…wouldn't it benefit you to have someone there monitoring their movements?"

Ryuzaki shakes his head and picks up his teacup. "Nobody is stopping you from returning to the police and going after Kira on your own time. If there's something you want to tell us, you can call Chief Yagami whenever you want but know that you'll be going at it with your own information. We'll never share any with you or the police." Ryuzaki's a bit cold, but he's being honest. Aizawa has to choose for himself…

It's strange though…I'm on Ryuzaki's payroll…so why can't the others be too? He spent enough money on this damn building, I'm sure there's more where that came from…enough for a few simple paychecks at least.

"Yeah…guess you're right…" Aizawa sighs.

"I have nothing against a detective risking his life to chase after Kira…but I can't see it as a correct decision to lose your job and cause your family to suffer because of it…Dying in the line of duty is heroic, but dying while unemployed is just stupid."

A little harsh but okay…

"Ryuzaki's right." The Chief puts a hand on Aizawa's shoulder. "Nobody will blame you for quitting now, Aizawa."

"Yeah, we won't think of you as a traitor." I roll my eyes at Matsuda. Hopeless…

"But Chief…you have a family too…"

"Aizawa, it's not the same…My son was suspected of being Kira and placed in confinement because of what Kira did. You saw what happened, I can't turn my back now…"

"I actually haven't given up on the theory that Light is the first Kira…" Ryuzaki adds this, but is ignored, and the Chief continues.

"My kids are grown…but yours still need their father…"

Aizawa tries to hold himself together but is slowly slipping. "It's not fair…It's not fair, damnit! I want to keep going…I've come this far, prepared to die at any moment…and if I quit now how will I ever be able to face Ukita?" He takes a ragged breath, losing control. "Damnit! Why the hell can't a detective on the police force go after a criminal!?" He turns his back to hide his face as he tries to pull himself together.

"Ryuzaki…" I turn my head to the computer as Watari's voice comes through.

He must have been listening…

"What is it Watari?" Ryuzaki sets his cup down.

"In the beginning you had me make preparations so that everyone on the task force and their families would be financially secure no matter what happened, including if they were fired from the police force…Why are you not mentioning that?" My heart drops and my eyes slide over to Aizawa as I prepare for him to snap.

Ryuzaki…was testing them…

"Who asked you Watari?" Like a spoiled child Ryuzaki basically tells him to be quiet.

"Oh, sorry; I just couldn't bear to hear it anymore…"

You and me both Watari…but I didn't know about that…

"Whoa! So, we've already been taken care of financially?" Matsuda becomes excited again. "This is great Aizawa! As long as you don't mind giving up the title of detective you can keep working with us!"

Aizawa doesn't say anything for a minute and his back is turned so I can't see what he's doing, but I can guess. When it comes to Ryuzaki, he has a short fuse…I don't know if he doesn't like him or just doesn't like the way he works, but this…this isn't gonna end well.

"Ryuzaki…" Aizawa's tone is calm and collected, but underneath I can hear the anger and I can see the way his fists are clenched.

Oh yeah…this isn't gonna end well.

"Yes?"

"You were watching to see which I'd choose, weren't you? You were testing me!" Aizawa turns back angerly, disgust written across his face in a sneer. The Chief is the first to try to calm him down.

"No, of course not Aizawa. Ryuzaki just doesn't like to reveal stuff like that. He probably wanted it to be your choice, and then after he would have offered the financial assistance." The Chief tries and fails to calm him down so Matsuda adds his two cents.

"Yeah, you know Ryuzaki is weird like that sometimes. He doesn't reveal things until the last minute."

"No…" Ryuzaki's voice shuts us up, we just stare. "I was testing him. I wanted to see which he'd choose…" The room becomes deathly quiet and I look back and forth between Aizawa and Ryuzaki, waiting for Aizawa to burst.

How could Ryuzaki do this? He knows how much this case means to Aizawa-no, to the whole team…And to test their loyalty after all we've been through…is just not nice…

"Alright! I've decided! I'm quitting here and returning to the NPA!" Aizawa finally snaps, but he doesn't move from his spot. I thought he might at least try to punch Ryuzaki…a lesser man would have…I might have even slapped him, if he pulled that stunt on me.

"Aizawa…" Matsuda takes a step forward, but Aizawa counters it with a step back.

"No! I couldn't decide immediately like you guys and I was leaning toward going back to the force…"

"But Aizawa…" Matsuda tries again, but it only makes him angry.

"No! I'm quitting! This just made everything crystal clear. I don't like Ryuzaki and I don't like the way he works." Aizawa turns and starts to stomp off. I want to help; I want to do something. We can't lose another member, not now.

"That's unfortunate, because I like you Aizawa…" Ryuzaki dumps oil on the fire and I glare at him as Aizawa turns around to yell at him one more time, not that Ryuzaki would see it, he's still facing the computer.

"I also hate how you always have to have the last word!" He storms off and in a split-second decision, I chase after him. As I run out the door, I hear Ryuzaki say 'take care', as if he really does have to have the last word.

"Aizawa wait!" I finally catch up with him and grab his arm, but he promptly shakes me off.

"No, Suzuki! I made up my mind!"

"But Aizawa-"

"No! You may not see it, but your boyfriends a total dick!" He continues to walk toward the elevators, but I stand there for a minute stunned by his anger. I shake my head and continue to follow him, telling myself he's not mad at me, but mad at Ryuzaki.

"Yeah, well, that may be, but we still need you Aizawa. Please stay…" We stop when we come to the elevator and he sighs, and for a moment I think he just might stay.

"I…I just can't" He sticks his hands in his pockets and looks at the ground. "My job as a police officer was hard enough on my family…but this one-" He scoffs as he looks up at the ceiling. "this one feels like it's twice as hard…I'm never home anymore, and it's starting to put a strain on my marriage…All I wanted to do was bring Ukita's killer to justice, but…" He looks back down.

"You can't risk your family anymore…" He looks at me sullen.

"You're boyfriend might be a right asshole, but I've spent enough time here…I have a young daughter who's always asking Mommy when Daddy will be home and a baby who probably doesn't even know my face…The Chief was right…my kids need me…" I look at him, he's heartbroken, but trying so desperately to make the right decision.

"Then go."

He looks up at me confused. "What?"

"If you're leaving to protect your family and not because you hate Ryuzaki; then go." He stares at me dumbfounded. "You don't have to feel like you're picking sides…or like you've failed Ukita…I'll still be here, the Chief, Mogi, and Matsuda will still be here; and we won't stop until we catch Kira, no matter how many there turn out to be. It was wrong of Ryuzaki to do what he did and I don't blame you for being upset, but if you're looking for peace, for a way to leave this place on good terms…for permission…you've got it…so go." His confusion melts into a grin and he puts a hand on my shoulder.

"Thank you, Suzuki…I still don't like the way Ryuzaki does things, but I know I can put my faith in you." He takes his hand away and for a split second I feel like a bastard because I know who Ukita's killer is…and we may never catch her.

"You're welcome, Aizawa…" My guilt over Ukita's death comes back around to rear its ugly head, but I do my best to bury it.

Aizawa hits the down arrow on the elevator. "You're a good kid Suzuki…smart too…Don't let any of this bullshit change that…don't let the darkness snuff out that light you've got…"

Oh, if you only knew…

The elevator dings as the doors open up. "I won't…Take care of yourself Aizawa…" He smiles as the doors close and for a second, I find myself thinking that this might be the last time I'll ever see him…

. . .

I walk back to the surveillance room feeling like there's a cloud over my head. We've just lost another member and it sucks. I open the door to the room, and everyone looks, once they see I'm alone they sigh and turn back. Matsuda, ever the silence breaker, is the first to ask the most glaring question.

"You couldn't convince him to stay?" I shake my head 'no' and head toward my pile of stuff on the table next to Ryuzaki. He doesn't realize what he's done, or maybe he does, who knows…

I quietly gather my things; files, laptop, empty drink, and whatever else, and put it all under my left arm, holding the empty drink in my left hand. Ryuzaki's ignoring me as he looks at something on the computer. Looking down at him causes irritation and anger to bubble up. Without thinking my hand jolts out and smacks him in the back of the head, like swatting a fly. It get's his attention and he looks up at me shocked with large confused eyes. Everyone else just stares, I've never hit Ryuzaki before, I've never needed to, and I don't know why I've done it now. There's only one word I can think to say to sum up everything I'm feeling.

"Idiot…"

I take my crap and head up the glass stairs next to Light, I head towards the elevators up there so I can go to my floor to work on my files…I've had enough of losing teammates and for the moment, I just want to be alone…

We've done it everyone, we've hit another miles stone. 70 chapters, can you believe it? I sure as hell can't. Thank you all for keeping up with me and reading this long. So i want to talk about the next chapter. i'm currently writing the first draft, but i'll warn you now, it'll be a tear jerker so get your tissues ready. I know i like to give you an emotional roller coaster but it seems to keep you interested. i'm not gonna tell you exactly what happens you'll just have to wait and see ;)

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Reviews -

Little Sunflower - Chapter 69 - I hope I don't annoy you with all my comments man. just want to support my favourite writer. I love you're writing so much so and please. don't worry take your time. don't let anyone moan at you for not bringing new chapters. take care of yourself. we can wait. I am sure. Please also stay as safe as possible. I care about you.

A - Oh god no, you don't annoy me at all. I get so excited when i get reviews it's not even funny. You all literally make my day. If i read a review i just start smiling and pull out my notebook and start writing. So keep em coming. If you really want to help you can always tell me what you like, what you want to see more of. I'm flying blind and just trying to write the story but i also like to add things that you like. If you want more fluff tell me, if you want another NSFW chapter, tell me lol. I'm here to tell their story, but i'm also an entertainer. If the past few chapters felt boring (which i get, it's mostly dialogue and the yotsuba arc is boring as hell) then tell me what you want to see to fix it. if i don't know then i cant change it yknow. I very very much appreciate your support. 3 I'm trying to stay safe, i mostly go to work and home, in this time of insaneness that we're living in. Its hard to wrap my head around the face that we're living in an event that might be in a history book some day, it's nuts. Awe thank you.

Alright, that's all for now so i'll keep working on 71. You'll love it, you'll cry, you might hate me for a minute, but don't read it at work cause you might cry, lol jk do whatever you want, but i'm aiming for tears. 3 see ya as soon as i can.