Elizabeth sat cross legged in the middle of the queen bed, plaid pyjama bottoms sitting neatly under her small bump and her sweatshirt stretched over it. Becoming a mother had always been something that sat quite far back in Elizabeth's mind, it being a possibility one day if the opportunity presented itself. But now that she had been pushed head first into the reality — She realised just how much she'd always wanted it.
The pregnancy had certainly come as quite a shock. Her cycle had been a bit hit and miss for a while and out in Baghdad, she had better things to do with her time than keep track of it. When she finally realised that she hadn't had a period for a while, she put it down to the stress of what had happened with Private Lawrence and of course Henry leaving. She had been under a lot of emotional upheaval and it was bound to have an effect on her body.
She'd paid Dr Curtis a visit when, what she thought was a stomach bug hadn't eased and she was vomiting quite frequently. The initial diagnosis was gastroenteritis, but when her fatigue increased and her bra actually hurt her breasts rather than supported them, the doctor had thrust a pregnancy test at her.
It had been a rather awkward and uncomfortable conversation, being asked about the frequency of her sex life. She had spent the whole time Henry was in Baghdad trying desperately to hide their relationship and to actually have to admit that she'd had intimate relations with him was a little embarrassing to say the least — Especially when the test came back very positive indeed.
Once it was confirmed, she'd spoken to Conrad, who had been far more understanding that she could have possibly hoped for, and got herself on the next flight home. It wasn't what she'd planned or the way she wanted to do things, but being forced to slow down and put her personal life before her career had come at just the right time. As soon as she'd wrapped her head around the news herself and knew that everything was progressing as it should — That's when she'd jumped in her car and made her way to Charlottesville to speak to Henry.
Elizabeth was perusing the room service menu when she heard a gentle knock. She climbed off the bed and opened the door, and just as she'd suspected, Henry was standing there, slight confusion still etched across his face but at least he had some colour back in his cheeks and he was willing to talk.
"You'd better come in." She moved away from the door and climbed back onto the bed. She had a feeling this was going to be a rather intense conversation so she may as well get comfortable. "I'm sorry I just dumped all that on you earlier Henry — It must have been quite a shock! Are you doing okay?"
Every time Henry thought he had Elizabeth figured out, she went and changed the narrative and surprised him all over again. She'd been dealing with this news all on her own for god knows how long — And yet here she was, more concerned about him.
"To be honest Elizabeth, I have so many questions flying around in my head right now that I don't even know where to start."
Elizabeth shrugged and offered him a warm smile "Take all the time you need — I'll tell you anything you want to know."
Henry threw his coat on the chair and perched on the edge of the bed, not quite sure where his words would come from "When I woke up that morning in my apartment and the only trace of you— of us—was a letter you'd left behind, It honestly felt like you'd taken my heart with you."
Elizabeth opened her mouth to speak, but Henry continued immediately.
"Seeing you again in Baghdad felt like we'd been given another chance — Like divine intervention was at play. But it still didn't work and I had to train myself not to think about you — Not to miss you or want you because it was consuming me in a way I wasn't sure I would ever recover from."
"Henry — I'm sorry—"
Henry shook his head at her "Just listen — Now you're here and we've made this little person together — Do you ever get the feeling that the universe is trying to tell us something Elizabeth? That there is this story already written that we know nothing about?"
Elizabeth pondered Henry's words "When my parents died, I lost all the faith I'd ever had in the world being a good place. How could there possibly be any righteous forces at work that would allow innocent parents to be taken away from their equally innocent children — My life was just a callous, empty expanse of nothingness that I had to endure day after day —"
Her eyes moved down to her tiny bump and then back to Henry and she smiled "But then those same forces brought you into my life Henry. And as much as I've tried to run away and fight it — We always seem to gravitate back towards each other. I think this has been fate's plan all along and I'm just beginning to see the possibilities of allowing myself to embrace it."
"You've been through so much Elizabeth — I can't even begin to imagine what that must have done to you. But all you're achieving by closing yourself off is more emptiness and solitude. Why do it to yourself? Do you think you need to be punished in some way? I don't get it"
"It wasn't my choice to be this way. I didn't set out to hurt you. I tried to tell you where my heart was and not pretend that I felt nothing but every time I got close, all I could do was run — I was hurting too Henry."
"And now? After everything we've been through over the past year— What does that mean for us? How do you really feel about me?"
"I love you." Her words were simple but it was something she wished she'd said a long time ago.
"I don't want to be a consolation prize because you're having my baby. I will always be here for you and our child but —"
Henry clasped his hands together and looked down at the floor "— I can't go through this process of you changing your mind and running every time you get spooked, not again! I just can't do it."
"You think I'm just saying it because I'm pregnant? I told you Henry — I am fully prepared to do this alone, I've been that way most of my life so it doesn't scare me. I haven't asked you for anything and we'll be just fine without you if that's what you decide. I don't say those words easily and when I do, I mean them. I'm in love with you Henry."
"Your actions have always spoken far louder than your words Elizabeth. I want to trust you — God I want to believe what you're saying to me but I'm concerned it's just your uncertainty talking. I'm settled, I have a girlfriend…." Henry suddenly stood up "Shit! I was supposed to meet Stacey for dinner…" He looked at his watch "…An hour ago."
Elizabeth's face fell and her eyes were stinging with tears threatening to fall "You should go."
Henry turned to look at her "Elizabeth…"
She shook her head "No Henry! You've just said it yourself, you have a girlfriend. I don't fit into your life anymore and I shouldn't expect to. You deserve all the happiness in the world and I hope Stacey gives you that."
Henry tried to reach for her but she moved off the bed and walked to the door "You need to leave now."
"Just hang on a minute! You need to give me time to work this out. I didn't think I would ever see you again Elizabeth and I sure as hell wasn't expecting you to be knocked up."
Elizabeth's face went from sad to furious in an instant "Knocked up? What a charming way to put it. I seem to recall you having a fairly big part in that Henry."
"I'm sorry…. You're right! This is all just so…"
"Fucked Up? I'm well aware. Now I'd really like you to leave. I'm tired and you need to go and grovel to your girlfriend."
"I don't care about her right now…"
Elizabeth huffed a sarcastic laugh "That's not exactly a good basis for a lasting relationship."
"Well, you'd know." Henry's mouth just kept saying things he didn't mean and the more he let his frustration run away with him, the more he was hurting Elizabeth.
Tears were now streaming down her face "Get out."
"Elizabeth - I didn't mean that."
She opened the door "I said get out."
"We can't just leave things like this. You're having our baby."
"Really Henry? And here I was thinking I'd just gotten fat. I have asked you to leave — Please do so."
Henry couldn't bear to see her crying and the thought of leaving her in that state, especially now he knew she was pregnant was not something he was ok with. But he knew he needed to sort his own head out before they could talk about this calmly and rationally.
"And what happens then? I walk out and you run away again leaving me with no way of contacting you, no idea where you are - And it's not just you this time Elizabeth. You said you thought I should know about this baby - well, now I do. I just need some time to figure things out."
Elizabeth wiped her cheeks with her sleeves "I have no intention of messing up your life Henry. If I'd have known you were involved with someone, I never would have come here. It was stupid of me to think…"
"To think what?"
"It doesn't matter. You need to live your life and be happy." She wrapped her arms around herself "I'm exhausted Henry and I just want to crawl into bed. I really need you to go."
"And how do I contact you? We have so much to talk about Elizabeth. You cannot just walk away again and leave me with nothing."
Elizabeth grabbed a pen and wrote her address and phone number down on the note pad, tore it off and handed it to Henry. "Here! This is my new number and this is my address - I can't run from you there, can I?!"
Henry looked at it and then back at her "Am I supposed to believe this is genuine? This could literally be anywhere. You're pretty good at disappearing when you want to."
"Why would I come here and tell you about this baby If I was just going to take off and never see you again? What would be the point Henry?"
"I guess I'll have to trust you." Henry stepped out into the hallway and then turned to look at her "It really is good to see you Elizabeth - I will be in touch! And please - Don't run."
"It's good to see you too Henry. I'll speak to you soon."
Elizabeth shut the door on Henry and on all hope of any kind of future with him.