I want to clarify that Azula is 18 in my story. Mai and Ty Lee as well, but this is because I made Zuko 20 so if Azula would be 14 – or Mai – then their past together wouldn't add up because Zuko would be six years older than her. And also, I like an adult Azula more because she is already haunting and terrifying when she is only 14, let alone when she is a full-grown woman.
Chapter 13 – Azula
Not long after that, they were found by the workers of the spa. A kind woman greeted them and took them under her care, having known Iroh from back in the days. They had lived in separate rooms and Milah kept mostly to herself, conflicted and at war with her mind and heart. Both wanted different things, confusing her, and making it hard for her to be around the reason why she was feeling down. So she mostly avoided Zuko and spent time with Iroh, who she loved dearly.
It wasn't until a beautiful day announced itself in the morning, sun high up in the sky, warming the air, that she saw him for the first time in days. The birds were singing in the trees and the flowers were moving with the soft breeze. He was leaning against a tree with a straw hat on to protect his face from the burning sun, looking particularly glum. Iroh was getting a massage, having a content smile on his face.
Zuko didn't notice the woman that stood in the shadows, watching him with doubt on her face. He also didn't notice that she walked away from him instead of at him. All he was noticing was his own self-pity and shame that seemed greater today than it was any other day. And of course, he knew why. It was the anniversary of his banishment.
However, Milah didn't know this. If she did, maybe she would have taken the small walk over to him instead of going to the little pond she spent much time at, feeding the turtle-ducks that were present there. A mother with her three little ducklings was always there, waiting for her to come along and give them some bread she would take from breakfast. And so she was there once again, feeding the four little creatures.
Meanwhile, Zuko had left his uncle after he made an insensitive remark about his banishment. He didn't even know what his destination was when he walked over a little pathway that led towards a lush part of the spa.
Milah heard footsteps behind her and when she turned around to face the intruder, she came face to face with Prince Zuko, the one she had been trying to avoid. His eyes were sad with bags hanging underneath them, indicating he hadn't been sleeping well. The straw hat was removed from his head, revealing his traditional ponytail.
Feeling washed over both of them, ones they both had tried to suppress so badly. And now, it was all for nothing. It was silent for a couple of moments, both of them staring deeply into each other's eyes, fighting the urge to reach out and kiss the other.
Because Milah wanted to kiss him so badly, it was out of this world. She wanted to kiss away the worries he was visibly harbouring just to fuel him with her love.
''So…'' Zuko said first, pink covering his cheeks. Milah was startled by the sound of his voice, having not heard it for such a long time and also by the course of her previous thoughts.
''So…'' she retorted, not knowing what to say. ''Are you okay?'' She eventually settled with.
He made his way over to her and sat down in front of the pond she was at, noticing the turtle-ducks that brought up happy memories, slightly washing away his sour mood.
''Not really,'' he finally whispered honestly. She was happy he had opened his door for her at that moment. She could tell he needed a friend right now, so that was what she would be now, forgetting why she was ignoring him in the first place.
''Why?'' she asked him softly, sitting down beside him. They both watched the ducklings washing.
''It's been seven years since my father banished me, on this day,'' he told her while fiddling with his fingers. She took one then on her own. He visibly relaxed. ''I'm nothing to him. Seven years. Who banishes his son for seven years?'' She could feel him struggling, making her chest contract from his hurt. She wished she could take it away from him. She couldn't possibly comprehend how it must be feeling.
''I'm worthless,'' he finally settled with, taking his hand from her. She shook her head quickly and grabbed his cheek with her freed hand to turn his head towards her. His eyes were glossy, but he wasn't crying. He never cried.
''Don't say that,'' she whispered encouragingly. His hand clasped over her own on his cheek and he closed his eyes, savouring the feeling of being close to her after so many days without having been. ''You are not worthless. You are Zuko, Prince of the Fire Nation, and the strongest Firebender I have ever met. You are caring, compassionate and strong.'' She sat up on her knees beside him, towering over him. ''You hear me?''
''You really think so?'' he asked her with an insecure voice. She nodded vigorously.
''Listen, you could've killed or tortured me, or worse when I was you prisoner. But you didn't. Don't you think I don't know that? And sure, you can be an asshole sometimes, but behind all that, I see a worthy man. You are worth it, Zuko,'' she continued and touched his forehead with hers, cupping his other cheek as well. He opened his eyes then and was met with the blue eyes he had grown to love so much.
''Thank you, Milah,'' he whispered and inhaled her scent after, trying to imprint the moment onto his brain.
''Anytime, my Prince,'' she jokingly said, wanting to back away to make some space between them once more, but he held her back by cupping her cheeks as well.
''Just a moment longer,'' he hoarsely whispered, wanting to continue this moment forever. ''Please,'' he added after noticing her hesitation. And finally, she relaxed into him, sitting beside him and laid her head on his shoulder, draping one leg over his. Their hands found each other as well, holding on to one another and him caressing the back of hers with his fingers. A content sigh escaped her lips, one which he heard and relaxed with as well. This was how he wanted it, with her by his side for now and always, even if it wasn't possible and his father wouldn't allow it. He didn't want to care about that anymore.
And so they stayed like this for a while, him being comforted by her and Milah feeling whole for the first time in weeks again. They both knew it was forbidden, but it wasn't relevant. Together, they watched the turtle-duck mother care for her ducklings. It was well past noon when the comfortable silence between them was broken.
''I wish we could stay like this forever,'' Milah whispered into the air, not knowing if Zuko would hear. But he heard.
''Me too,'' he answered softly, caressing the back of her hand still.
''So why don't we?'' she hesitantly continued, knowing she wouldn't like the answer she knew she would get. He stopped his gentle touch for a moment, but continued fairly quickly, sighing.
''You know why,'' he sighed. She did as well, moving away from him. As long as he would give her that answer, she wouldn't be anything to him. No matter how strong her feelings for him were.
''I'm sorry,'' he continued, wanting to pull her back into his embrace. He turned to face her, seeing the disappointment and sadness in her blue eyes, ones he adored.
''It was a stupid question, so don't be,'' she managed to bring out of her mouth, not knowing if her voice would be trembling or not. Luckily, she was strong, so she hid her emotions well.
''It wasn't. Maybe someday…'' he dared to say, not wanting to promise her anything, but wanting to make it true one day, in the near future. ''We can…'' but he didn't finish.
She stood up when he didn't continue his sentence, wanting to get away from the man that managed to make her do irrational and irresponsible things, although their closeness for the past hours had helped her mood drastically. She felt lighter, somehow, like a weight had lifted from her shoulders.
She needed him, she realised, to function, maybe, or something else. She just needed him around her, the foolish Prince of the Fire Nation, with the scar on his face which she thought was beautiful now. It completed him.
He stood up as well, towering over her. His face was one of regret and an emotion she couldn't comprehend, one which she could read from his face quite often when he would look to her. One she harboured on her face as well when she would look at him.
Milah was the first one to walk away from the little pond, making way towards her room to search for a good book in the bookcase which was in her chambers, thankfully.
Zuko made his way towards his room as well, walking some spaces behind the girl he couldn't keep his eyes off, the girl that managed to drive him crazy with every move she made and every word she said. He met up with his uncle when he neared his sleeping area and together they continued their paths, wanting to get some tea.
Milah was reading her book in a quiet spot – not at the pond, she would avoid that spot after the moment she had shared with Zuko – underneath a cherry blossom tree, enjoying the sounds of the chirping birds and the rustling of the leaves. The sun was already setting when she heard footsteps for the first time. She looked up, expecting to find either Zuko, Iroh or one of the spa's employees, but it was a girl around her age, dressed in a fancy Fire Nation attire with the same eyes as Zuko and Iroh. She wore a red crown on her top knot, making her recognisable as someone of nobility.
She was walking from Zuko's room, making it obvious that she was related to them in some way. In what way, she didn't know. She didn't know much about Zuko's family or past, only about the event that resulted in his scar – a story which Iroh had told her once so she had some more insight about why he could be the way he was sometimes.
Milah was still eyeing the mystery girl when suddenly, she turned her eyes and looked straight at the Water Tribe girl. Milah gulped visibly, not knowing if she should greet her or something, but luckily, the Fire Nation girl kept walking after a moment, her eyes facing front again. She had been terrifyingly beautiful, her eyes golden and haunting, an emotionless expression present in them. The way she walked was with such elegance and dominance that even the birds had stopped singing for a moment, everyone around her intrigued with the girl.
''Milah!'' Iroh suddenly came running, shouting at her, a couple of minutes after she had seen the girl. ''Did she see you?''
''You mean that Fire Nation girl?'' she asked him, standing up so she could face him properly. ''Yes, she saw me, why?''
''That was Azula, Zuko's little sister,'' he answered her. ''I'm surprised she didn't acknowledge you.'' Milah's heart was thumping.
''Why would she?'' she hurriedly asked, taking a step closer to Iroh, holding her book tightly to her chest.
''Well…'' he started, but didn't finish. ''Why don't we discuss this over dinner?'' Milah hesitated but complied anyway. Together, they walked towards the dining area, where Zuko was already sitting rather excitedly. She sat down opposite him and Iroh.
''So, does anyone want to tell me what happened?'' she started, wanting to get the elephant out of the room.
''My sister, Azula… she told me that my father wants me home again,'' Zuko started softly, his eyes almost glowing with happiness. ''He regrets his banishment.''
She didn't know what to say for a moment, not understanding what will happen. ''So… now what? You're going to leave?'' she eventually started. ''Leave… me?'' came out almost as a whisper. His eyes widened and he quickly shook his head.
''No! That's the thing, he has invited you as his guest,'' he assured her hurriedly. ''He has heard of your aid during my escape from the Water Tribe and wants to thank you, Azula says. Can you believe it?'' With this he took her hand, his face saying it all, he wanted to convince his father for them to be together like they had said to each other through the many shared looks and gentle touches.
She took one look at Iroh when he said this and had all the confirmation she needed. The old man shook his head slightly, his eyes sad. He didn't believe a single word of what Azula had said, apparently, and Milah knew it was kind of unbelievable. No way that the Fire Lord would invite a Waterbender to his home, no matter allow his son to be with one.
But upon seeing Zuko's face again, the hopeful look and the twinkle in his eyes, she couldn't help but go with the lie his sister had woven for him. ''That's wonderful news!'' she answered him with equal enthusiasm. ''But, Zuko… do you really think that your father wants me, a Waterbender, in his home? Do you think it'll be safe?'' His face fell for a moment and he retracted his hand, eyes casting down to his untouched food.
''I don't know,'' he answered truthfully. ''Maybe not.'' Iroh put an encouraging hand on his shoulder.
''Maybe it's best if Milah stays here,'' Iroh tried to reason with his nephew. ''We don't want her to be in danger, right? And let's be honest, your father doesn't like Waterbenders, does he?'' The Fire Nation Prince shook his head, knowing that was the truth.
''No, he doesn't,'' he whispered. ''But… what then? I'll just never see you again?'' Blue met with gold across the table, grieve and sadness being exchanged. It was then that he stood up, walking away from the table. Milah followed him quickly, saying a quick goodbye to Iroh.
''Zuko!'' she shouted after him once they reached the little path that led to the sleeping quarters. ''Wait!'' His pace was quick, so she had to run after him to catch up. But he didn't stop until he had reached his own room. The night was dark, she noticed. It was clouded and the moon was only half visible.
''Don't bother,'' he told her when he saw her standing in his door opening. He was sitting on his windowsill, staring at the barely visible stars above. ''I don't want to talk right now.''
''Don't be like that,'' she scolded him. ''You're not a child, so don't act like one. We can talk about this.'' He hmphed, still not turning around to face her. She made her way over to him and climbed up the windowsill so she could sit next to him. Their legs touched, electricity sparking where they touched.
He finally turned around then, facing her at last. Her eyes were clouded with heartache, he could see, making his own hurt as well. She reached out for his hand, taking it in her own.
''I don't want to leave you either,'' she whispered at him. The only thing that could be heard besides their own breathing was the fire crackling in the little hearth behind them.
''Then don't leave me,'' he whispered back, his other hand cupping her cheek. She closed her eyes when he said that.
''I can't go with you to the Fire Nation, Zuko,'' she told him more harshly. ''Please, can't you see that?'' He shook his head in denial.
''I'll protect you, I promise,'' he tried to persuade her. ''You'll be safe with me.'' Milah shook her hand, taking his cheeks as well with both her hands.
''Zuko, I won't come between you and your father. Think of this as a fresh start. You'll be off to your home and I'll look for my family. That'll be good, trust me,'' she tried to reason with him once more. They were close, too close, but she didn't care.
''I don't want to lose you,'' he whispered hoarsely. ''I can't.''
''You won't. I'll never forget you. And who knows… maybe one day, when the war is over, we can see each other again,'' she took the final step. He sighed, his breath tickling her. She smiled at him, knowing she had won this battle.
''I'll never forget you,'' he whispered then started leaning in. She closed her own eyes, ready to finally get the kiss she had dreamed about so often. His scent almost drowned her. She swooned over the intimacy they engaged in. It was amazing.
But when his lips softly grazed hers, igniting fireworks in her stomach and chest, a cough came from behind them, ruining their first kiss.
Well, it wasn't really a kiss. It was barely a peck, seeing their lips hardly touched each other. But still, it was more than she had ever done with a man, and frankly, she couldn't wait until she could kiss him for real.
''Prince Zuko, we should pack,'' Iroh startled them both. They had already sprung apart from each other, leaving both of them cold and alone.
''Yeah… I should go. I'll see you both in the morning,'' she whispered, sliding off the windowsill. She gave Zuko one last smile, but it didn't reach her eyes.
He didn't try to stop her and watched her leave the room after saying goodbye to Iroh. He knew she needed some time alone after the words they had said to each other or after the kiss they had almost shared. He was angry at his uncle that he had ruined the beautiful moment he had waited for such a long time.
When Milah was back in her room, she laid down on her bed instantly, not bothering to pack her belongings. The only thing that belonged to her was on her neck; the necklace that Zuko had given her months ago. Tears formed in her eyes, sadness sweeping over her. The loss of Zuko affected her more than it should.
But, on the other hand, she would get to see her family again once she found them. She would have to go around and ask people whether they had seen the Avatar and his friends. Maybe she would even get some help on the way. Who knew?
And with that thought, she fell asleep, dreaming of lightning and the bluest fire she had ever laid eyes on. The next morning, she woke up by a knocking on the door. It was Zuko, telling her that he would be leaving soon. So she quickly freshened herself by taking a quick bath, bending the water out of her hair, and putting on the fresh set of clothes the owner of the spa had kindly left for her on her nightstand. It consisted of a brown skirt that reached below her knees, a dark green oversized shirt that could be tucked away in her shirt and a pair of comfortable sandals that were conveniently her size. The owner said it had belonged to someone that had forgotten it in one of the drawers and never came back to collect it, so it would be hers now. She was grateful, seeing she didn't have any money on her so she couldn't go to the market to get her a new outfit. Also, this way she could blend in with the Earth Kingdom citizens. She already stood up because of her tanned skin and blue eyes.
Once she was done, she walked out of the door and to the exit of the spa. Zuko was leaning against the gate, holding his bag over his shoulder, looking towards the ship that was in the port.
''Hey,'' she greeted him. He turned around to face her and she could see he hadn't had much sleep. She frowned when she didn't see his uncle anywhere. ''Where's Iroh?''
''He isn't coming, I think,'' he replied with a hint of guilt in his voice. ''We had an argument last night.''
''That's not right,'' she criticized him. ''You shouldn't leave without him.'' He gave her an annoyed look.
''It doesn't matter. He doesn't want to come anyway,'' he dismissed the subject and took a step closer to her after. ''I'll miss you.'' She gave him a little smile.
''I'll miss you too. But you should go now, or maybe she'll come up and see me with you,'' she tried to get him to leave quickly. Her voice was already almost trembling and tears were threatening to spill once again. She didn't want him to see her like that.
''Okay. And I promise, once it's possible, I'll look for you and you can finally come and see my home,'' he assured her. She nodded quickly, biting her lips to hide her quirking lips. He wrapped his arms around her then and pulled her close, wanting to savour this last moment with her. And with a last kiss on the cheek, he turned around to leave.
She watched him go with anguish. She was sobbing quietly, already feeling her heart break. He had promised her that he wouldn't leave her on the shores of the Water Tribe, but she knew it was unfair to hold him on his promise. And besides, once he would figure out that his sister was lying, maybe then his views on his father and his Nation would change. Maybe then he would choose to follow the light instead of the darkness.
Her crying was cut off by sudden footsteps. It was Iroh, running downhill, with a wild look in his eyes.
''Milah! Has he already left?'' he asked her hurriedly.
''Yes, he has. Please tell me you're going with him?'' she begged him. He nodded with a grin.
''Of course, I won't let my stubborn nephew deal with his sister alone, right?'' She nodded with a smile as well, gave him a tight hug, and watched the old man leave as well.
This was her cue to leave as well. She would go towards the kitchen first to grab some food and water before she would leave, thinking it would be wise to have some for the first few days on her journey.
Meanwhile, Iroh had caught up with his nephew, glad that he was able to before he had reached the ship. Zuko's heart was aching, calling out for the girl he had left and probably wouldn't see again. The girl he wanted so badly to be by his side forever.
''Brother! Uncle! Welcome! I'm so glad you decided to come,'' Azula exclaimed. ''But… where's the girl?'' Zuko looked unsure to his uncle, not knowing what lie they would tell her.
''She fell ill last night, so she wasn't well enough to travel. Very contagious!'' Iroh told Azula smoothly, but her eyes were narrowed in suspicion. Zuko commented on that to make it sound more believable.
''Yes! She had red spots all over her face. Very nasty. So she'll be travelling to the Fire Nation herself when she's all better,'' the Prince added. Azula sighed and rolled her eyes.
''Fine,'' she closed the subject, but secretly, she would send a vessel out with a few guards once they left the harbour. That way they could catch her before she could get too far. The captain spoke up.
''Are we ready to depart, Your Highness?'' he asked her. Azula gave everyone a sickly sweet smile.
''Set our course for home, captain,'' she told him. A feeling of home-sickness filled his senses mixed with happiness.
''Home,'' he whispered to himself, wistfully.
Up the mountain, Milah gave the ship one last look. She could barely make out the figures of Iroh and Zuko. They walked up the ramp, making Milah's heart ache one more time, but a sudden movement stopped the ache. Out of nowhere, Iroh started to attack the others on the ramp. His fire was so powerful that it was clear as day, even from where she stood. Zuko was walking up the ramp towards his sister and quickly pushed the two guards blocking his way away with his own Firebending.
Milah was starting to panic. What now? Should she go down to help them? Or should she stay here, watch what happens and hope they will come out okay, waiting for them?
She decided to stay and watch, hoping with all her heart that they would come out unharmed, without being taken by Azula's guards. Iroh was swiftly fighting off all the guards and tossing them into the ocean. On the ship, Zuko was fighting Azula with a strength that amazed her. But Azula was good. Too good. She stepped out of his way and dodged his attacks that reminded her of Aang. She was anticipating his attacks before he had even made them.
And then, all of a sudden, they stopped fighting. It looked like she had grabbed his arm, but then she pushed him away with a powerful blue fire blast, shocking her. Zuko was eyeing her from the ground when she started waving with her arms in a calm and collected way – one that reminded Milah very much of Waterbending – creating lightning.
Milah had never seen anything like it. It was amazing and terrifying, just like Azula was in essence. It was clear as day upon only taking one look at her. She was not to be trifled with.
But Iroh had taken her hand before she could cast the lightning at Zuko, redirecting it towards the very mountain she was standing on top of. Luckily, it was far off to the side she was standing, or otherwise, a possible landslide would take her down towards the rocky shore, killing her. He had pushed her out of the way, into the water, and she saw them moving down the ramp, running upwards towards the way which they came.
Milah was ready. She would meet them on the road, she decided and waited patiently. Finally, after five minutes, they appeared.
''Milah!'' Zuko shouted and took her hand to drag her along with him. Together, they ran for their lives. ''Quickly!''
Iroh was surprisingly fast, she noticed, for an old man. He didn't seem to be having any trouble running up the mountain and continuing running for a good ten minutes after. They ran through the forest, strayed from the path until they reached a stream that led them downhill. They followed it until finally, they couldn't anymore, wanting to get some time to breathe. All of them collapsed on the ground.
''I think we're safe here,'' Iroh panted and Milah agreed.
Zuko stood up beside her then, taking a small dagger from his bag. Iroh eyed him suspiciously as well but understood what he was about to do. Zuko sat down by the river bank and cut off his ponytail then, leaving him almost bald. Iroh took the dagger from him after and cut off his own bun as well.
Milah stood up as well, taking the dagger from Iroh. She reached behind her, taking her long locks and put the knife against them.
''No!'' Zuko yelled then and took the dagger from her hand quickly. ''Don't. Your hair is too beautiful.'' And with that, he went through it with his hand.
''Okay,'' she agreed softly, giving him an assuring smile. ''But I will have to cut it sometime. It's getting too long.'' Indeed it was. It almost reached her butt.
The three of them stood up, watching the river for a little while. Milah stood in the middle and took the advantage of it, taking Zuko's hand with her right one and Iroh's with her left one.
''It'll be alright,'' she tried to be optimistic. ''I promise.''
And hopefully, she could hold up to that promise.
Thank you Vosck! Are you happy that she hasn't cut her hair? I wasn't planning to when I started writing this story, I like that Zuko likes her hair, so :)