A/N: I know it's been long, but I hope this makes up for it, because… this chapter has 9500 words! I mean, can anyone even believe that?! I know I can't. I have worked my ASS of last night. I suddenly had so many ideas running around in my head that I knew I had just HAD to put it on paper immediately, even if I should've been studying for my retake exam (which is next Thursday, fuck me). And by the way, just a little heads up, things WILL get steamy at the end of this chapter. I have never really written a scene like this before, so I will welcome all of your feedback! Let me know what you think of this chapter.
Chapter 22 – Ba Sing Se: The Beginning of the End
''…so, I was buying some fresh vegetables from the market. Apparently, there is a new cabbage stand that's become the most popular on the eastern side,'' a blue-eyed woman with curly brown hair was talking to a man that was nodding off to the story he was being told. The sky was dark and full of stars, signalling it as nighttime. ''But then, out of nowhere, a rabaroo hopped in and destroyed all of his merch! I was lucky I got out of that place on time because I heard that some of the places around there were destroyed beyond repair.''
''M-hm, yeah,'' Bohai answered her story with a far-away voice, letting her know that his head was somewhere else.
''Yeah and Lee and I finally shagged last night,'' she added with amusement.
''Yeah, that's cool,'' he answered again, nodding but still zoned out. Milah knew it was time then and put her hand on his arm, stopping him effectively from walking on.
''Bohai, what's going on?'' she asked him. ''I've known you for more than a week now and I've never seen you this distracted. What's on your mind?''
He had a troubled look on his face. ''It's nothing, really. Nothing you need to worry about.''
Milah smiled at him. ''You know you can tell me anything, right? You listen to me with all of my relationship drama with Lee. The least I can do for you is return that feat.'' And man, did she have drama with Zuko. He and Iroh had taken up a job at a local tea shop while she had been offered a job at Yin's mother's fruit selling shop. Honestly, that woman loved the Earth King as if he were her own husband, but who was she to judge?
He laughed at that, shaking his head. ''You're right. So, Yin and I have been together for several years now and in two months she'll be eighteen, the age where she can move out and get her own apartment in the city. But it can be expensive and since I have a rather large one, I was wondering whether I should ask her to move in with me.''
''Bohai! That's such a wonderful idea!'' Milah exclaimed and clapped in her hands from excitement. ''She'll say yes, for sure. I know how much you love each other.''
The man before her blushed before looking at the ground, bending a loose piece of rock before him to his hand just to swing it around in his hands. It was still strange for the Waterbender to be friends with an Earthbender, especially because she knew that Earthbending was strictly forbidden in many of the Fire Nation oppressed towns throughout the Kingdom.
''You know, I never got to ask you, are you a bender?'' he asked out of nowhere as if reading her thoughts. Redness threatened to creep up on her neck.
''N-no, I'm not,'' she stumbled over her words, suddenly aware of all the water molecules floating around her in the air. ''Why do you ask?''
Bohai stared at her for a moment, looking as though he was trying to see into her soul to get the answers to the difficult questions he was asking. ''You have such distinct features. Blue eyes, tanned skin, curly hair… it's almost as if you're Water Tribe.''
She was silent for a moment before answering. ''What's the policy in Ba Sing Se if you're another bender?''
''Well, to be fair, Airbenders are extinct and Firebenders… well we all know about Firebenders,'' he chuckled, still throwing the rock around in his hands. Milah chuckled along, albeit nervously. ''So the only other benders beside Earthbenders that could be here are Waterbenders.'' He stared at her again with a mischievous glint in his eyes. ''Are you a Waterbender, dear Kya?''
But before she could answer him, they had finally arrived at the tea shop where Iroh and Zuko were currently working. She opened the door to the shop, effectively ending their conversation. The inside of the place was comfortingly warm, driving the chilling cold away that settled in the streets of Ba Sing Se nearly every evening. Every table contained a candle and a little vase filled with some flowers from her boss' teashop, giving the place somewhat of a homey atmosphere. The place was filled with guards, locals and a single girl with black hair wearing green robes sitting in a corner, quietly sipping her tea while occasionally gazing over her cup at the frowning man wearing his usual working attire. A man that caused an eruption of butterflies in a certain woman's stomach.
''That conversation is not over yet,'' Bohai whispered beside her, taking a seat near the window. Milah followed him quietly, trying to catch the Prince's eyes just so she could gaze into the golden embers that set her whole mind and body on fire.
''It is, though,'' she answered him when she finally took her seat opposite of him. The Earthbender simply laughed at her, shaking his head for the second time that evening. From the corner of her eye, she could see Iroh making his way over to their table.
''Kya, how nice it is to see you,'' the old man greeted the pair with a cheerful voice. ''How was your day at the shop?''
''It was fine. Not as busy as other days, but it was okay,'' she answered him with her usual smile plastered on her face. Meanwhile, she spotted Zuko busying himself with pouring in some new tea in the cup of the girl that had been sitting alone. And then he finally turned around, facing the woman carrying the blue eyes he had been yearning to see all day. His heart stumbled in its pace and fluttered with an emotion he so desperately wanted to give to her but was too scared to admit.
Milah tentatively raised a hand to give him some sort of greeting when he noticed who was sitting opposite of her. The fluttering was replaced by a hurt weighing heavy on his stomach. His growing smile grew into a frown deeper than the one before, causing Milah to drop the smile he wanted to see on her face all day every day, making him hate himself a bit more than he already did.
That night, when Milah had already gone to bed and was fast asleep, seeing she had to work early again the next morning, Zuko entered their room to ready himself to bed, knowing that he had to get up somewhat early as well, seeing he had the opening shift at the shop. But before he would lay down in their bed, he gazed at his Waterbender for a little while longer. Although could he still call her his Waterbender? From where he could see it, she had moved on with Bohai here, in Ba Sing Se. It was clear as day to him. All they did was hang out and drink together in front of him as if she was taunting him with her new relationship. Had they kissed? Had she given herself to him completely? Had she-
''Zuko?'' a whisper beckoned him from the dark. Milah had sat up and was gazing at him in confusion. ''What are you doing?''
He was silent for a moment, not knowing what to answer. For some reason, it didn't seem appropriate to lie in a bed with a woman who was now with another man. His heart hurt and struggled to ignore the rational part of his brain, but it was in vain. His mouth had already opened and was moving at its own accord. ''I'm going to take the couch. See you in the morning.''
Milah frowned, confused by his words and why he didn't want to lie with her anymore. ''Why?''
Zuko simply shook his head, running a hand through his long hair before walking over to his side of the bed. He grabbed his pillow with more force than necessary, making her wince as if she had done something to offend him.
''Zu-'' she whispered after him, but he had already closed the door behind him. Silence ensued in the darkness that now surrounded Milah alone. The left side of the bed felt cold and unfamiliar to the touch now she knew that she wouldn't wake up in his arms anymore in the morning. Wetness dripped down her cheek and with that, she knew that tomorrow, she would confess to him.
Tomorrow, she would finally, finally, take the jump into the deep and tell him, once more, that she still loved him. Even after all he had put her through, she still loved him.
The next morning, Milah woke up in a surprisingly good mood. After all, today, it was all or nothing. And she had convinced herself not to care if he still didn't feel the same. She was certain that he felt the same – there were too many signs – but the reason why he hadn't told her yet was that he was scared. She was tired of waiting and was ready to take the manner into her own hands.
Her work day went by slow, her nerves and anticipation making the time move at a slower pace than usual. Butterflies had been attacking her insides all day, making her clumsy in her work. She had already knocked over a crate filled with oranges earning her a stern look from Mrs Yin senior, Yin's mom.
But when the sun finally started to set, Milah knew it was time to go home. Time to tell a man who was so certain he was unloved and unworthy, that he was loved and worthy. And so much more.
Meanwhile, Zuko had been having a hard day at the tea shop. Customers seemed more rude and unforgiving than usual. Although it could have something to do with Zuko's mood that was even more sour than usual. His uncle had been staring at him funnily all day as well, setting him off more than once. And to top it all off, a young woman robe had been sitting at a table in the corner for more than an hour, occasionally watching him and getting on his nerves.
It was afternoon when Zuko caught the woman staring again which made him wonder if they had been compromised. He decided it to be wise to tell his uncle, who always seemed to know what to do in those types of situations. Luckily, Iroh had been stocking up the supplies so he could warn him without being overheard by the other man sitting at a table nearby, looking glum.
''Uncle, we have a problem,'' he softly said to Iroh, who climbed down the ladder to investigate what was wrong. ''One of the customers is on to us. Don't look now but there is a girl over there at the corner table. She knows we're Fire Nation.'' Iroh looked back, making Zuko grind his teeth with annoyance. His uncle certainly knew how to attract anyone's attention. ''Didn't I say don't look?!"
Iroh had a mischievous look on his face. ''You're right, Zuko. I've seen that girl in here quite a lot. Seems to me she has quite a little crush on you,'' he told his nephew, wanting to know what his reaction would be. He was well aware of his nephew's feelings for Milah, but maybe he needed to have a little nudge in the right direction. The direction that would point towards confession instead of denial and ignorance.
Zuko was shocked for a moment, not knowing what to do with such information. His immediate thoughts went to Milah, at how his love for her was probably too great for him that he could never love anyone else but her.
But hadn't she moved on? Hadn't she been parading under his nose with Bohai, that stupid Earthbender? If she had moved on, who was he to stop himself from trying to move on from her? Although it would probably be in vain – he knew that in his heart – but he could try, at least. Maybe his heart would learn to heal from the shards it was currently residing in.
Zuko looked at his uncle then, wanting to have the answer to his questions. But he was too scared to admit it to his uncle. To admit his feelings out loud would make them real and he wasn't ready for his feelings to be real yet. Not when Milah had crushed his heart underneath her boot after he had done the same to her on the very night she had admitted her love for him.
The stupidity in me is truly unrivalled, he thought to himself.
''Uncle, I…'' he started, but trailed off after he saw the girl making her way over to them.
Iroh had seen the turmoil inside Zuko's eyes – the eyes that reflected his inner conflict so well – and knew what to do. Knew what nudge he would give for him to finally find the courage to be honest to Milah and, most of all, himself.
''Thank you for the tea,'' the woman told Zuko, sliding coins inside his palm. Zuko merely looked flustered. ''What's your name?''
She had dark chocolate brown eyes and a kind smile. Her long, dark hair was sitting in braids draped over her shoulders. She was pretty, easy to look at, but not overly beautiful, like Mil-
No, stop, he scolded himself inside his head, focussing on her question instead without wanting to be rude. ''My name's Lee. My uncle and I just moved here.''
''Hi Lee, my name's Jin. Thank you and… well, I was wondering if you would like to go out sometime,'' Jin asked the stunned man in front of her, who didn't know what to think of the woman in front of him.
The Prince was going to decline the offer because he wasn't ready at all to go on a date with another woman. No, first he and his heart had to heal. That he needed to do on his own. But before he could do so, his uncle answered for him, giving him an instant headache and second-hand embarrassment. He was 20 years old for Christ's sake! Surely that meant he could accept and decline date offers on his own, right?
''He'd love to!'' Iroh quickly jumped in the conversation, cutting off whatever Zuko was about to say.
Jin's smile seemed to widen some more. ''Great. I'll meet you in front of the shop at sundown.''
After Jin left, Zuko turned to his uncle, giving him a glare that made the old man cringe a little, but still a little sparkle in his eyes told Zuko that Iroh had some ulterior motive for his action, making Zuko wonder whether he had missed something.
Milah had arrived at the tea shop at dusk, a determined step in her walk. She knew what she was about to do and felt overly confident all of a sudden. Nothing could stop her now. After tonight, she would scream from every roof in Ba Sing Se how much she was in love with Zuko. After tonight, their life together could finally begin. She had been fantasising about it all day and could already see their future together.
A movement from the window of the tea shop made Milah slow down all of a sudden, recognising the woman that was making her way towards the counter where Zuko and Iroh were in conversation. She had been coming over to the tea shop frequently, noticing the same braids and familiar robes she was wearing. Coldness suddenly spread over her entire body, her instincts warning her not to go inside but to walk around the building to the nearest window that had a clear view of the two men – hiding her effectively while she could still overhear their conversation.
She made it quick work, crouching underneath the window and straining her ears to catch the conversation. She could hear the woman's voice, noticing the sweetness and innocence with the way she spoke and when she dared peek an eye through the slits of the window, she could see the beauty radiate from her.
What could also be seen was the way Zuko was staring at her like he saw a Goddess for the first time. His mouth was hanging slightly open and his eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. It would've been hilarious if it wasn't for what would come next out of Jin's mouth – Milah had caught her name in the meantime.
''…was wondering if you would like to go out sometime.''
The coldness that had spread over her body intensified in a split second, her heart almost bursting out of her chest. He'll say no, she repeated to herself in her head for what seemed like an hour before finally, an answer came. An answer that caused her to feel betrayed by the person she had always trusted the most. The person who had always been there for her, always, and she always confided in.
Iroh had betrayed her upon saying those three cursed words.
''He'd love to!''
And when Zuko didn't contradict this, letting the woman confirm their date and walk away, Milah let herself drop to the damp ground, from the earlier rain that day, in defeat. The inevitable had happened. Zuko had moved on. He had moved on.
The man she loved more than anyone else in the world, more than even her own family, had moved on.
She stood up, numbness filling her entire being, blocking out all emotions – the only positive thing happening right now – and walked away from the tea shop to make her way to her home. The home that, as she walked through the front door, now felt empty and dark. Once, it had filled her with hopes and dreams for the future. The future she had hoped she would share with Zuko someday.
Her eyes began to burn and her throat started to close up, signalling to her that the numbness was almost replaced by the immense grieve she should be feeling.
Iroh had told Zuko to quit earlier than usual in the tea shop so he could prepare for his date with Jin, although he wasn't looking forward to it. Secretly, he had been worrying about the little Waterbender who hadn't come by the tea shop yet. Normally, she would drink a cup before leaving for home. He wondered if something had happened, but didn't think too much of it when he stepped inside the home that was still engulfed in darkness. As quickly as he could, he changed his attire in his room and grabbed the pot of grease that would hopefully make his hair stay in one place – it was growing so long now that at some times, he probably looked more like a dishevelled fire ferret than anything. He exited the house again fairly quickly, making his way over to the tea shop again so his uncle could do his hair.
Never noticing the blue-eyed woman sitting on the roof above him, gazing out onto the street and the man holding her heart, watching his every move as she would continue to do so the whole night. When she had entered her home, she realised she didn't want to be at the place where she had envisioned so many dreams, a place which now caused her to hurt. And she had been hurt too many fucking times. This would be her last night in Ba Sing Se, she decided for herself. After this, she would leave. There was nothing for her here anymore.
And so she had found some solace on the roof, the closest she could be to the moon. She could see the other streets as well, several figures walking home after a long day of hard work. A dog barked somewhere in the far distance while a cat owl was meow-hooting every now and then. She could see the creature sitting on top of the roof opposite of her, staring at her with its big, green, almost luminous eyes.
It flew away when suddenly, a door closed. It wasn't like it closed with a bang, no, the streets had just been quiet for a moment. The dog had stopped barking for a moment, there weren't any people chatting and no guards were patrolling any nearby streets; it had been silent.
But not anymore. When Milah looked towards the source of the sudden sound, she suddenly wished she hadn't. Zuko had exited the shop – changed his attire as well, he wasn't wearing his usual outfit but had donned a fine suit instead, which she guessed Iroh had bought for him – and was looking around him as if searching for Jin.
And there she was, coming from around the corner. She wore a green dress, highlighting her womanly curves while her hair was put in a casual updo. She looked amazing, intensifying Milah's insecurity and confirming Zuko's interest in Jin instead of her.
She almost couldn't bear looking at them but decided to watch them anyway. She wanted to know what would happen. She wanted to have that confirmation all night, just so she could leave Ba Sing Se without any doubt left in her heart. She wanted Zuko to deliver the final blow to her heart so that maybe her own could let him go finally. Eventually.
''Hey,'' she heard Jin greet Zuko. Their voices echoed loudly in the street. She was still walking up to him when he turned around to greet her. ''Well, look at you. You look so cute.'' And with that, she ruffled his hair. In turn, Milah could see him stop her from doing so, having an annoyed look in his eyes. It satisfied her for a bit.
''It took my uncle ten minutes to do my hair,'' he scolded her at which she grabbed his arm to drag him away.
Milah watched them walk off, not keeping her eyes off of them for a single moment. She stood up from her place on the roof and took a leap onto the next roof, and the next, and the next, until eventually, she neared the bustling part of the city where she could still spot the two. She had her arms wrapped around Zuko still, making her stomach churn with jealousy. They took place at a restaurant. Luckily for her, they had grabbed a table that could be seen well from her point of view.
She could see them making conversation, although she couldn't hear them this time. They were too far away and there was a lot of noise around her coming from other people.
It became boring after a while. Nothing exciting happened. Zuko could be seen giving short answers, like yes or no, and he barely looked her in the eye. Milah wondered why he wasn't making any effort with the girl. He had agreed to the date, the least he could do was make it pleasant. Especially since this didn't confirm anything for her. Instead, this made her doubt even greater. Because why would he even go on this date?
When Milah had turned over to lay on her back for a while, looking up at the clear, starry night, she was startled by a loud yell made by a voice she'd recognise anywhere.
''She's not my girlfriend!''
The whole place quieted for a moment before picking up their conversations again. Milah swallowed, her eyes trained on the golden ones that burned with such ferocity it almost scared her, after sitting up to see why he would scream that to someone. A waiter could be seen walking away from the pair; he had probably asked something that had set him off.
It made her sigh. He could be such a drama queen, and she knew it, but still, it felt good to hear him say that to her. Because no, she wasn't his girlfriend.
They were talking for a while again before Jin's eyes lit up. The girl grabbed a few plates and cups from all around them and pushed them in his hands as if he needed something with them. Zuko looked awkward for a moment, but eventually, for some reason, he threw them up in the air causing them to break apart all over him, resulting in him sitting there with various pieces of food sprawled over his hair, face and clothes. She couldn't help but burst out laughing, wondering why the hell he had done that. Broken pieces of plates and cups were now laying around their table.
But her laughter quickly disappeared when she leaned over to grab his hand and tug him along with her to some other place. She readied herself to follow them again, careful to stay out of their line of sight and hopped from roof to roof until finally, they had reached their destination. It was quiet here, making her somewhat relieved because now she could pick up their conversation again, although she was pretty far away from them so their voices were mostly muffled.
''I can't believe it! They aren't lit,'' Milah could vaguely hear Jin say, her mood visibly transforming from happy to sad. Zuko was looking at her with an expression she couldn't decipher from this angle.
''Close your eyes, and don't peek,'' he said to her.
And then he did something that Milah almost didn't want to believe he would do for another girl. Confirming the one thing she had been seeking for to be confirmed this very evening. He was lighting up all the lanterns around the fountain with his firebending, bringing not only himself, but his uncle as well, in danger should any of the guards or others be nearby.
Although she had to admit, the fountain was beautiful. The lights were reflected by the water, creating a glow around the square that she would certainly remember. The lights in the pool looked like stars, creating a dreamy atmosphere all around them.
It was the most romantic place she had ever seen, and Zuko was here, with another woman.
Milah was distracted for a moment, not knowing if staying here would really be her best option now. Maybe it was best if she would just go because from the looks of it, Zuko was about to kiss Jin-
Zuko was about to kiss Jin. Or the other way around. It wasn't exactly clear from her perspective. All she could see was them holding hands and facing the other, leaning into each other. Milah wanted to close her eyes, she really did, only she couldn't bring herself. She had tosee it. Had to see Zuko kiss someone else.
Although it didn't happen. Zuko had offered her something which she accepted, and from what she could make out of their conversation it was apparently a coupon for a cup of tea which Milah knew had to come from Iroh. Only the old man could come up with something like that.
But Milah was alarmed again when she saw Jin reach up again, holding his face. He rarely let anyone touch him, but here this girl – who he only just met like, 5 seconds ago – was touching him like they had known each other for years. Like he didn't mind her touching him.
When will you finally fucking get it you stupid penguin, he doesn't love you, he never has and he never will, her subconscious scolded her, making her tear up for a moment.
But the thing that made her crack, the thing that made her heart stop before bursting out in a million pieces, making it difficult for her to breathe, the thing that broke her at that very moment, didn't come until after Jin had taken Zuko's cheek with her hand. No, after Jin had done this, she had stepped up to him and pressed those delicate, rosy, plump lips of hers against his. And when she had done that, Milah had held her breath, willing Zuko to step away from the girl, and he had done so. He had stepped away, but only before pressing his lips against hers once more.
And that's when she knew.
The only time Zuko hadn't been lying to Milah was on that night when he left her. On the night when he told her he hadn't loved her, ever. Her mind hadn't lied to her either; it had been telling her the right thing all along. No, Zuko had lied to her on all other occasions. Every conversation they had had about their feelings for each other, like the one by the turtle duck pond, or the fight in the middle of the night in the middle of the forest, where he had so clearly suggested his feelings for her. But it was clear now. As clear as day.
He hadn't loved her. Ever.
She turned away when she saw his lips touch hers, rolling over from her stomach to her back. Tears were rolling down her cheeks and quiet sobs were escaping her lips. Her body broke down at that moment. She didn't move either. She couldn't. It was physically impossible for her to move when there wasn't any purpose anymore.
But you do have a purpose. You can get out of here, find Katara. Find Sokka. Help the Avatar win this war. That can be your purpose, the little voice inside her head whispered. Yes, it could be her new purpose.
Zuko was running home, trying to clear his mind from the thoughts running through it.
What the actual fuck had he been thinking.
Why in hell's name had he kissed her back?! Why did he do that? He could only imagine Milah's face when she would find out he had kissed another woman, although it had barely been a peck. It was still enough to have guilt gnawing at his insides, his dinner threatening to come out at any time.
When he arrived back at the house, his uncle was busy cutting his little bonsai trees in the windowsill, his eyes twinkling with knowledge. ''How was your night, Prince Zuko?''
He didn't answer him, still mad at his uncle for accepting the date without his consent, and opened the door to his room before shutting it rather harshly. Regret immediately filled his stomach, making him open the door and answer his uncle shortly.
''It was nice,'' Zuko told him and closed the door after, turning around to face Milah inside their room.
She wasn't there.
This made Zuko frown. Certainly, she should've been back by now, especially since her shifts always ended earlier than his ones did. He remembered her not coming to the tea shop either today, although he didn't worry about it then. Maybe she had to work overtime then, but now, it was almost midnight, so it was strange that she wasn't here.
He exited his room again, facing his uncle. ''Have you seen Milah?''
His uncle's face went from possessed by mysterious knowledge to one of great worry. ''No, I haven't seen her since…'' he drifted off.
''Since when?'' Zuko pressed on, already walking to the door that would lead him outside.
''Zuko, I… there's something you should know,'' Iroh tentatively began, stroking his beard thoughtfully. ''When you left for your date with Jin, I watched you go away from the window. At the same time, I saw Milah following you. She was jumping over the rooftops. I don't know what you've done during your date, but…''
Iroh saw his nephew going through emotional turmoil. Anger, worry, sadness, guilt, all passed through his eyes at the same time.
''You mean to tell me that Milah saw me kissing that girl. Milah saw me kissing… fuck.'' He never swore in front of his uncle, but this was different. He had never felt like he did at this moment. Shame was filling up his being, shame that seemed even greater than the shame he had experienced 7 years ago, on the day his father had scarred him for life. And that was saying a lot.
''Zuko, she'll be back, trust m-''
The door opened suddenly, breaking off what Iroh was about to say. In came Milah, her eyes puffy and red, her hair dishevelled and tangled, but still looking as beautiful as ever in Zuko's eyes. It wasn't hard to guess that whatever she had seen hadn't been good.
It was silent in the apartment. If someone would've dropped a pin, one could've heard it fall on the ground. Zuko and Iroh were looking at Milah like deer caught in headlights, not really knowing what to do. Iroh usually knew what to say in these kinds of moments, but right now he was thinking that maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to let Zuko go on a date. He thought it would let Zuko realise that he had to come clean about his feelings, but he hadn't for a single moment thought about what it would do to Milah.
Milah was staring at the floor, not daring to look up at the two men penetrating her soul with their stares. Her heart was too broken for anything at the moment. She wasn't sure she could handle any more. She had found the strength after a time while she was up on that roof, staring at the crescent moon. It had given her strength, somewhat, so she found herself standing up and making her way back to the apartment eventually. Her only intention there was to pack her things and leave Iroh and Zuko for good. And so she did. She would.
But there she stood, too cowardly to look them in the eye, and her strength was slowly leaving her body once more. And she knew that before it had left her body completely, she would have to blurt it out to them. And so she did.
''I'm leaving,'' she told them with a hoarse voice, still facing the floor. ''I'm going to pack my things and leave. Tonight.'' And with that, she turned away, opened the door to her room and started packing a bag with her sparse belongings.
Zuko went after her in a frenzy. She couldn't leave. She simply couldn't. She couldn't leave him. Without her, he would be lost. She was his everything. Everything. He heard his uncle say he was heading out for a bit – something about having to clear his mind – and left the apartment. What he didn't see was the sad glint in his uncle's eyes or the look on his face that would tell Zuko that despite everything his uncle said, Iroh wasn't all-knowing.
''Milah,'' he called out to her after closing the door behind him. ''Milah, please.'' He didn't know what to say, only that she had to stop packing her bags and let him explain what had happened.
''Fuck you, Zuko,'' she softly cursed him while grabbing some clothes from the closet. Tears were threatening to leave her eyes again.
''Fuck,'' he whispered, striding over to her before grabbing her arm and effectively stopping her from packing any more clothes.
Milah pushed him away harshly, making him stumble back. ''Don't fucking touch me, you sick bastard!'' she screamed at him, tears now definitely leaving her eyes. ''I hate you!''
Zuko's own eyes started to burn upon seeing her this devastated. ''No, Milah,'' he replied with a husky voice. ''Please don't say that.''
She laughed at that, sobs still coming from her mouth at the same time. ''What? That I hate you? Well here I go again, I fucking hate you!'' She turned around then, grabbing her hair as if she wanted to pull it out of her skull. She started crying loudly, her whole body shaking. It was an effort to stay on her feet.
''Milah!'' he yelled at her then, wanting for her to snap out of the state she was in right now. ''Stop this. Please just stop this.'' He dared walk up to her again, grabbing her hands so she would stop ruining her beautiful hair. For some reason, she let him.
''I d-don't-'' she stopped, a sob and hiccup leaving her mouth. ''I c-can't. I want t-to leave, Zuko, p-please just let m-me leave.'' She crumbled to the ground, her hands still clasped in Zuko's warm ones. Zuko sank to the ground with her, taking her whole being in his arms, wrapping them around her middle while one hand held her head to his chest, tucked underneath his chin.
''My Milah,'' he whispered, his throat closing up while his eyes burned. He knew what he had to do, even if it terrified him to do so. He knew she needed to hear it. He had to come clean now. It might be his only chance to do so if she truly desired to leave that night.
And so he grabbed her cheeks with a delicate touch, one he didn't know he possessed and tilled her head up so their eyes would meet. And when gold met blue, he spoke the words he had been dying to say.
''I love you,'' he started, his heart stuttering in his chest, ''and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And maybe you don't believe it, maybe I'm too late, but I have loved you ever since you sang that beautiful song on my ship more than 6 months ago. And I have never stopped loving you.''
The two of them stared in each other's eyes for a moment, complete silence engulfing them, before Milah's face finally broke and she, again, started crying.
Zuko was confused. Why would she start crying again? Was that an indication that maybe she doesn't love him at all?
No, that doesn't make sense, his inner voice told him, to which he agreed. But why in hell-
''You don't even know…'' Milah started suddenly, placing her own hands atop his which were still holding her cheeks. ''You don't even know for how long I have longed to hear you say those words. You don't even…'' And she stopped again, taking his hands from her cheeks so she could stand up from their embrace on the floor.
''Milah, are you…'' he started to ask, ''I mean, are you… do you… do you feel the same?'' Finally, he dared to ask her, afraid of the answer he might get. Milah was turned away from him, facing her bag packed with clothes. He held his breath, preparing himself for the situation in which Milah would leave him. He wouldn't blame her, certainly not, not after all he had put her through.
''You…'' she started, startling him after it had been silent for a long moment. ''You… love me?''
''Milah,'' he softly called out to her, walking up to her, pressing his front to her back. He grabbed her loosely hanging hand, wanting to feel the softness of her slender fingers. ''I love you. I love you more than anything or anyone in the whole world.'' And with that, he felt her giving his hand a little squeeze, and whether she had done this knowingly or unknowingly, it didn't matter, not to his stuttering heart nor his fluttering stomach.
''Say that again,'' she whispered, a sigh escaping her mouth after she felt his hot lips touching her earlobe.
''I love you, Milah.'' And with that, he turned her around swiftly before grabbing her head and kissing her finally. She eagerly returned the kiss, her previous anger and grief that had filled her being only moments ago long disappeared. The love that Zuko had admitted he felt for her had filled her up instead.
Milah's hands found their way to his clad chest, wanting to feel his hard muscles underneath the stupid piece of clothing he wore. They wandered up, towards his face, caressing his beautiful scar and trading her fingers through his soft hair.
Zuko took his hands from her face, wrapping them around her middle instead, feeling up the small of her waist and back, not daring to explore further than that yet. He still didn't know if she was still mad at him, or if she was feeling any other emotion that could turn around the moment they were having now.
All thoughts flew through his head when he felt her tongue tentatively touching his lips. He complied immediately, earning her a grunt escaping his throat. All his blood suddenly rushed downstairs, making him swoon for a moment.
Milah tugged at the knots of his shirt, wanting to take his clothes off faster than a rabaroo could hop. He reacted immediately, ripping off the buttons and shrugging off the jacket before pulling his undershirt over his head as well, exposing his naked upper body to her hungry eyes and hands. But Milah didn't have much time to gaze upon his naked glory because she was pulled into the kiss again. She didn't mind, though, because now she was finally able to let her hands wander over his muscled abdomen and arms, having found their home again at last.
Zuko tugged at the robes keeping Milah's dress together, thinking it was fair for her to lose some clothing as well. Luckily, she complied, letting it slide off her shoulders once the knot had come loose. She was in her underwear, making Zuko's pants strain almost painfully. His member had become rock-hard upon seeing the lust in her eyes, her swollen and red lips, her dishevelled hair not from outside, but from his own hands.
They kissed again, a moan escaping Milah's lips when Zuko lifted her to put her on the windowsill. She could feel his erection pressing against her core, making her own throb with anticipation. Her heart was almost beating out of her chest because of what she hoped would happen tonight. Of what she had dreamed about for months.
Zuko's hands were caressing her thighs, squeezing them every now and then which caused her to clench them, signalling to him that she was just as aroused as he was. But still he didn't dare slip his fingers underneath the cloth concealing the private part of her body. But, God, did he want to rip away the one thing that hid her from him.
His cock throbbed painfully, making him grunt against her lips. ''God, you're so fucking beautiful.''
''I love you,'' Milah moaned in their kiss, making him grab her cheeks so he could deepen their kiss some more.
''I love you,'' he whispered after breaking their kiss for a small moment, gazing into her wild, big, blue eyes.
The kiss ensued, but Milah had enough of Zuko's delicate behaviour with her. She wanted, no, needed more from him. She wanted him to make her his. Forever. And she wanted it to happen here, in their home, where their life together could begin.
''Zuko,'' she murmured against his lips, her hands wandering lower and lower until they reached his pants where she hooked her fingers underneath it so she could pull all of him against all of her. ''Show me.''
''Show what?'' he asked her obliviously, genuinely not getting her point.
She broke off the kiss for a moment, wanting to look into his burning eyes while she would say it. ''I want you to show me… how it's done.''
He still looked confused. ''What do you mean?''
Milah let out a little laugh, letting her forehead fall against his naked chest before looking back up. ''I mean, I want you to show me how it is done, Zuko.'' She let her right-hand rise so she could caress his scar again. His confused look turned into one of desire upon his understanding, and she could feel his cock twitch against her leg.
''Are you sure?'' he huskily asked her, pressing his nose against her delicate cheek before kissing it.
''I've never been more sure about anything in my life,'' she answered him with a soft but strong voice, tilting her head so he would have more access to her neck. He gladly took the opportunity to worship the slender skin, kissing and sucking on the right parts, making her gasp and moan in pleasure. In the meantime, her hands found the strings holding his pants together and made it quick work to untie the knots. When she had loosened the piece of clothing, she hopped off the windowsill so she could tug them down for him. He stepped out of them, his hard member now clearly visible through his underwear. With big eyes, she stared down at the thick length of it, gulping when thinking about how that was going to fit inside of her. But she knew he would be gentle with her, so fear wasn't present in her mind at the moment.
She started their kiss again, pressing her hands against his chest so his knees would buckle against the bed, making him fall upon his back. She climbed on top of him, hesitantly putting her core over his crotch, making him moan quietly. His hands were harshly grabbing her thighs and slowly moving upwards until they almost touched her own member. A sigh escaped her lips.
Zuko had enough of the vanilla situation and decided to take the matter into his own hands, flipping them over so he was now resting between her legs, pushing his length against her lady parts, making her moan out once more. And when he rocked into her, she ran her nails over his back with painful pleasure.
''Zuko,'' she moaned against his lips, her head falling back when he rocked into her once more, hitting the right spot.
He reached up with one hand, squeezing one of her breasts while he continued to rock into her. ''Take it off,'' she whispered against his lips. He paused then, looking into her eyes, trying to search for any doubt. ''You can take it off if you'd like.'' There was hesitation on her face now, but it wasn't because she didn't want to take it off. No, it was because he was taking so long with answering her.
''Milah, I… are you absolutely sure you want to do this tonight?'' he asked her one more time, needing her consent once more. She nodded eagerly.
''Unless… you don't want to?''
''My Milah, you don't even know how badly I want to do this,'' he assured her, ''I just want to make sure that you want this too.''
She nodded slowly, her eyes telling him that she was truthful and without any hesitations. He flipped them over again, his body sitting up and holding her close to him with his hands pressed against her back. He kept looking in her eyes when his hands wandered to the clasp of her chest binding, and when it fell loose between them, he kept looking, even when he felt her peaked nipple graze his chest, causing a shudder to go through him. She didn't seem shy, no, in fact, she left his lap so she could pull her last piece of clothing down, stepping out of it and standing in front of Zuko in all her nakedness.
Zuko had dreamed about Milah so many times before, but when she showed herself to him with such confidence, nothing could have prepared him. She was like a goddess, her round and full breasts topped with a small, rosy nipple, inviting him to worship, and her womanly hips, her muscled arms and legs, she was like a gift sent from heaven.
''Milah, I know this is going to sound cliché, but you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen,'' he whispered, standing up to kiss her once more before deciding to return the favour, stepping out of his underwear as well. His cock sprang out, hard and ready to go. Unlike Zuko, Milah was openly staring at his member, making him shift on his feet for a moment.
''Zuko, I…'' she started suddenly, wrapping her arms around herself. ''How's it going to fit? I've read about it in books, but still, will it hurt much? Will it-''
He shushed her by kissing her once more, taking her cheeks with his hands. ''Listen, if you don't want to do it, just say so, because it will probably hurt. And don't worry whether it will fit or it won't; it'll fit.'' Her eyes were still determined, her hands placed upon his sides. ''We'll go slow, trust me, my little Waterbender.''
She puffed out a laugh with that, shaking her head at his new nickname for her. ''I trust you, my Prince.''
He groaned upon hearing her call him that. ''I love it when you call me that.''
''You know, I'm actually something of a princess myself,'' she retorted, giving him a little kiss on his mouth.
''I know. You're my Waterbending Princess.''
And then they were kissing again. Zuko grabbed her under her soft bottom so he could lift her up and onto the bed, onto the position they had been in just a moment ago. Her hands were again exploring his naked body, groping his bottom, when he broke off their kiss and made a path down from her chin, to her neck, to the upper part of her breast until he finally wrapped his lips around her pink nipple, sucking on the tender flesh.
A pang of pleasure shot through Milah's body when Zuko began attacking her nipple with his skilled tongue. His other hand had found its way to her other boob, squeezing and rolling her nipple between his thumb and finger, making her grind her lady parts against Zuko's bare cock. This earned her another groan from the Prince who now switched boobs, kissing, sucking and licking the other one just as proficient as he had the other. And his right hand now caressed her inner thigh, moving it closer towards the exposed part of her member until he had reached the slick part of her, making him groan out in ecstasy upon feeling her already wet and ready for him. But he knew he couldn't yet start. First, he had to do something else.
Milah was still gasping out his name in small whispers when suddenly, she felt his fingers rubbing a part of her she didn't even know existed. It was like he was firebending straight into her core, a loud moan escaping her mouth when he sped up his pace. In return, he left her breasts only to slide himself off the bed, kneeling in front of her while he put her legs on his shoulders, his eyes meeting hers once before he devoured her pussy like it was his last meal before he would die.
''Zuko, I-'' she pulled at his hair, trying to prepare herself for the feeling that was building up inside of her stomach. Sweat formed on every part of her body, her mouth open in a silent cry. Stars were dancing in front of her eyes.
And then the feeling exploded, fire spreading over her whole being, clouding her every sense and thought. She squealed in delight, gripping the bed sheets and Zuko's hair with her hands like they were her only lifeline at the moment.
The Prince went back up again, loving the sight of her when she had just cum by his hand, or in this case, tongue.
''That was amazing,'' she whispered, taking his cheek with her hand again. He simply smiled at her.
''I'm glad you liked it,'' he answered dryly, earning him an eye-roll.
''They didn't mention this in any of the books,'' she mentioned truthfully while still recovering from her peak.
''I bet they didn't.''
And with that, she pressed her lips against his again, still feeling his hardened manhood pressing against her entrance. It twitched upon feeling the warm and wet parts of her slit, wanting to break that barrier so badly it almost hurt.
''Zuko I'm ready,'' she whispered against his lips, still writhing underneath him waiting for the moment to happen. He nodded against her lips, caressing her hot body once more before grabbing his length and coating the top of it with her juices. She groaned against his lips, spreading her legs even wider so he could have better excess. And then, when he deemed the time right, he slowly thrust his cock inside of her.
Zuko hadn't lied when he said it would hurt. Her muscles were straining against his thick length.
''I'm sorry,'' he whispered against her cheek, his breath coming out in short puffs. ''I'll stop if you want me to.''
''No,'' she managed to get out. ''Please, continue.''
And so he did. He entered her further until he had filled her completely. She bit down on his shoulder to keep from crying out, but when he pulled back slowly and thrust in once more, it hurt a bit less. And it kept hurting less the more he moved as slow as he could.
It was difficult for him to be patient, he knew that, but for her, he would keep the agonisingly slow pace until she was ready for more. And thankfully, after a couple of strokes, her face changed from one of pain to one of pleasure, indicating that he could speed up a little.
And then, finally, he was thrusting in her at a normal pace, willing his constraint to hold while he held off his orgasm. He wanted this to last forever, but he knew he couldn't, not when Milah was still gasping and moaning his name like he was everything to her. Which, when he thought about it, was true. He was everything to her where she was everything to him.
He flipped them over then, letting her sit on top so she could set the pace for a moment. It didn't take long for her to figure out the right movement, moving up and down with such expertise that he almost began questioning her virginity, although he knew she hadn't been with another man but him.
And when Zuko could almost feel his own orgasm come to the surface, he flipped them over again, putting her legs over his shoulders so all of him filled all of her.
Milah's body was trembling with an upcoming orgasm when Zuko thrust his cock inside of her from that angle, hitting places deep inside her core. And then, she came for the second time that night, Zuko cumming shortly after, his groan shaking her to her bones and heart. She felt his seed spilling inside of her, his manhood pulsing from its frenzy.
Milah slid her legs off his shoulders, laying them to rest upon the bed. Her body was slumped from exhaustion, the adrenaline leaving her body slowly. ''That was amazing.''
''So you've said,'' Zuko answered, laying himself beside her while his arm was draped around her stomach. He was gazing at her with eyes that she now knew held love for her. ''I love you.''
''I love you,'' she said back, pressing a small kiss to his nose. A small smile left his lips, his eyes closing for a moment but opening again fairly soon.
''Before we're going to sleep,'' he started suddenly, standing up in all his naked glory. ''You have to clean up.'' And with that, he walked off to their bathroom. She got to admire his naked butt this way, so she didn't complain. However, there was no way she was going to walk over to him right now. No, the bed was far too comfortable.
Luckily, Zuko had brought a wet towel with him with which he cleaned her thighs and upper parts of her womanhood with such expertise that she wondered with how many women he had been with before her. If maybe she wasn't the only one to which he had said ''I love you''-
No, don't think like that, her inner self scolded her and she knew she was being ridiculous. If Zuko told her he loved her, then he loved her. It was as simple as that.
''Thank you,'' she told him, stretching out after he was done. She didn't notice him standing at the edge of the bed, staring at her naked body as if he hadn't ever seen a woman's naked body before, his crotch hardening once more.
He cleared his throat, willing his erection to leave, and answered huskily, ''don't mention it.'' He climbed over her then, wanting to kiss those inviting lips one more time before scooping her up and laying her down under the covers, sensing how tired she was from her first time. He had learned that it was normal for women to feel like that, so he willed himself to remain calm when she pressed her bare butt against his already aching cock once he had laid down beside her. He wrapped his right arm over her waist, her cold hands gripping his warm one.
''Goodnight, Zuko,'' she whispered against his palm.
''Goodnight, Milah,'' he whispered back, ''I love you.''
''I love you.''
And with that, they fell asleep, content smiles on their faces.
All was well.