Author's Note: I have been wanting to update this for a while now because I knew what was going to happen but I just didn't have the time! Oh well. I think I made good on my promise to update between May and June so you gotta give me some credit!
TO RECAP: it is March of 2016. The last chapter took place on Thursday, March 17th and Kisame treated Itachi to French fries dipped in chocolate frosties/milkshakes. Spring break was 2 weeks prior and this chapter takes place on Tuesday, March 22nd and extends through Friday, March 26th. Easter Sunday is that weekend.
Happy Reading! I hope you enjoy!
ATTN: ABSOLUTE ANARCHY: *said over a loudspeaker* I want to point out that you were "curious as to what could be bothering Kisame so badly. He's not the type to get ruffled up so easily." Remember that chapter? Itachi wanted to study a week in advance and Kisame said that he had something planned. I don't blame you if you forgotten where we're at in the story but a quick re-cap would be to read over your previous reviews ~ ;)
ATTN: THESLYMISTRESS: You are officially 3 chapters behind and your shout-outs have been revoked until further notice! ;P
ITACHI WOULD HAVE MUCH PREFERRED to have Deidara snap at him as opposed to this. He wasn't hissing at him or saying anything sarcastic but he could definitely hear the hurt in Deidara's voice when he spoke of the events that transpired last month. Every bit of new information was like a punch to the gut as if Itachi wasn't feeling bad enough for his attitude regarding the blond.
He knew he should apologize. Say something at least but he wasn't expecting the conversation to end up like this. He was at a loss of words. What did you say in response to something like that?
"Gotta go. My interview's in less than an hour and I wanna get there early for sign-in." Deidara announced, rising to his feet.
"Good luck." Itachi called after him.
But the door to their room shut before Itachi could hear Deidara's reply.
If he replied at all.
-8-8-8-
Almost five minutes passed since Deidara left the room for his interview and Itachi hadn't moved from his position. "I got the rejection letter on Valentine's Day, yeah. I was kinda bummed out about it but there's nothing that chocolate can't fix, right?" The revelation echoed in Itachi's head. Deidara was already having a crappy day and Itachi only added fuel to the fire.
He had sincerely intended to try to remedy their strained relationship by the end of the school year. To part ways on decent terms. He just wasn't sure how. And now he felt at an even greater loss than he did before. How could he remedy things if a sense of guilt silenced his voice when he moved to open it? Just thinking about Deidara's words sparked a small pain in his chest.
As much as it bothered him, there was nothing to be done at the present moment in time. Deidara was gone and Itachi didn't know where to start the next time he talked to him, much less apologized for an event that happened over a month ago.
"You know you can ask or tell me anything right?"
Maybe Kisame could help him tackle this. The athlete was sure to have better people skills than he did and Itachi was finally starting to warm up to him. Asking him how to approach this would probably be the smartest idea if he was serious about fixing things between him and his roommate. And he was.
Speaking of Kisame, Itachi wondered what he had planned this weekend that wouldn't allow him to meet with Itachi to complete his statistics homework ahead of time. They'd still get it done before it was due on Thursday; two days prior wasn't exactly "last minute" even if Itachi could never wait to do an assignment that late if it could be helped. The swimming season was over he thought, so there couldn't have been a competition this weekend. In addition, he'd like to think that Kisame would've invited him to watch if it was his last competition of the season. Or maybe he had plans to meet with the person he had feelings for.
Itachi wouldn't know how something like that could span the entire weekend because he'd never tried to win someone's affections before.
Whatever the reason, Kisame would most likely share with him the details the next time they got together. And if he didn't Itachi wouldn't press him for any.
-8-8-8-
He was going to tutor him in statistics. Nothing more, nothing less.
At least, that's what he told himself as he quickly stalked across campus to meet Kisame at his apartment to tutor him. It wasn't anything different from what they've been doing. He meets Kisame at his apartment. He helps him understand concepts he didn't understand in class. They practice a little. Kisame finishes his homework ahead of its due date. Itachi leaves. Simple.
But today Itachi was planning to ask the upperclassman how to initiate a conversation with Deidara. And just the thought of opening up and asking for advice rattled him to the core.
He tightly wrapped his arms around his torso to keep from shaking and grinded his teeth together. The temperature plummeted twenty degrees on Sunday and persisted. Although he threw on a warm coat the open area between buildings acted like a wind tunnel, more so as he passed by narrow openings where the wind would barrel towards him and stop him dead in his tracks. His bangs would no doubt appear as if he'd woken up after a rough night of partying which Kisame would bring up the moment he saw him which would not ease his anxiety in the slightest. At least he could pin his uneasiness on the weather conditions if Kisame picked up on his shaky demeanor.
"Whoa, your hair!" Kisame greeted him when he reached University Hall.
He wasted no time pushing past the older man to reach the warmth of the lobby. "I know."
"Is it bad out there?"
Itachi put his hands to his burning cheeks. "It's windy yes, and the temperatures are below freezing."
Kisame looked at him with wide eyes and a gaping smile then through the double doors to the outside. "Who wears a skirt in this weather?!" He said of someone braving the cold in the quad. "Slut." He muttered and turned to where Itachi was waiting. "Damn if I knew it was going to be that bad I would've trekked over to your place instead! I'm sorry!"
Itachi ran a hand through his hair to untangle the knots the wind created. "It's fine." And it was. The reason Itachi agreed to meet at Kisame's place was because Kisame claimed he could concentrate better and because there was no chance of Deidara walking in and jumping to conclusions if they studied in Itachi's room.
"Next time, maybe." Kisame said and turned to the stairs. "Some light exercise will get the blood circulating." He laughed.
Itachi shook his head. He didn't mind taking the stairs as Kisame's apartment was only on the third floor. A little exercise wouldn't kill him as Kisame mentioned.
"Hey, before we go in, I just want to warn you—"
Sentences that start that way are never a good sign and immediately Itachi was preparing for the worst.
"—that my roommates are there." He finished.
Athletes. Itachi assumed.
"I meant to text you but I thought they'd leave before we met up, you know?"
He was apologizing. Rowdy athletes.
Kisame extended his hand to clasp the door knob but did not open it. From the inside Itachi could hear someone laughing. "They shouldn't bother us. We can study in my bedroom if you want. It'll be quieter there."
Quieter. Loud, rambunctious, young adults with the maturity of a child. Before today he'd never thought about what Kisame's roommates would be like because he never envisioned meeting them. There was a possibility that the men just beyond the door were simply enjoying themselves and were as loud and boisterous as Kisame was but Itachi doubted that. Kisame's precautionary warning raised red flags as Itachi prepared himself for the worst.
Kisame pushed the door open and urged Itachi to enter first so he could close it behind them. Immediately Itachi picked out Kisame's roommates, one of which was tall and muscular with short hair and a steely eyed gaze and the other was more ragged looking if his short bushy beard and his oversized untucked button up shirt was anything to go by. Itachi was by no means an expert on contemporary fashion but he was fairly certain that the latter did not hold his appearance in high regard.
"That your new boyfriend, Kisame?" The ragged one barked in their direction.
The taller roommate smirked behind him, holding a can of beer in his hands.
Kisame returned the smirk and extended his arm to flip them off. "Fuck you, Jinpachi!"
Whether Jinpachi and the taller man standing beside him knew of Kisame's sexual orientation, Itachi did not know. Either way, their exchange appeared to be good natured fun. The kind of good natured fun shared between athletes that is mainly comprised of throwing insults and trying to out-do one another.
"Kisame."
Kisame halted in his tracks to turn to the voice calling his name.
The taller of the two roommates stood at the fridge with an opened beer can in hand and brought his arm back to toss it to him. "Have a beer with us."
It was no surprise that Kisame caught the pass with ease. "No thanks." He said and passed it back to the taller of the two.
"What's the matter with you?" Jinpachi accused from across the room.
"I have homework to do." He replied.
The taller man narrowed his eyes. "That didn't seem to stop you on Friday."
Kisame didn't miss a beat. "That was when I still had time to complete my statistics homework. I'm running out of time now." He said and turned to leave.
"Suit yourself." The taller one called after him.
Kisame didn't say anything back and opened the door to his bedroom for Itachi to follow him inside.
"What was that all about?" Itachi asked. He could easily piece together the bits and pieces of information he overheard just now to figure it out but wanted to hear the full story from Kisame in case there was something he was missing.
The older student slowly crossed the room to take a seat on the unmade bedspread before beginning his story. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this for a while." He sighed and looked up to meet Itachi's eyes. "Remember how I told you I couldn't study last weekend because I had something I needed to do instead?"
Itachi nodded. "Yes."
"Yeah. Well. Friday was my twenty-first birthday and I planned to spend the weekend out getting drunk with my friends."
Itachi hoped that wasn't the case. But he wasn't surprised. He knew that the upperclassman was twenty-years old and would eventually turn old enough to legally purchase and consume alcohol and alcoholic beverages.
"I didn't want to tell you because of…you know…" He stammered. "I know how you feel about drinking and I didn't want to jeopardize what we had going you know?"
"What we had going?" Itachi asked, just barely above a whisper. He didn't intend to voice his thoughts but it was too late to take it back now.
Kisame's eyes widened slightly and he averted his gaze to the closed door behind Itachi instead. "You know. I think you and I had a good thing going here. You help me pass classes you've already taken and I repay you with trips to get French fries dipped in chocolate frosties." He said.
Itachi wasn't aware that Kisame intended to pay him in disgusting food pairings for his time and efforts tutoring him. Beyond that, he was hoping Kisame would talk on behalf of their friendship instead of their weekly tutoring sessions. To Itachi, it sounded as though Kisame only valued his presence for his tutoring skills. Not because of any particular trait of bond the two shared.
"I didn't want you to think badly of me if you knew I went out to get shit-face wasted the moment I turned twenty-one." Kisame continued. "And I promise I'm not going to overdo it or anything like that. I swear."
"How can you be so sure?" Itachi asked. Again, he didn't mean to speak what was on his mind but he couldn't help it. How could someone like Kisame, someone who was likely to be easily swayed by the pressure put upon him from his friends and fellow teammates, not to drink to excess and get seriously injured in the process? Or worse, seriously injure someone else?
"Just trust me." He said. He was staring straight into Itachi's eyes now with an iron resolve. "Trust me and I'll prove to you that I won't do anything stupid under the influence."
Itachi inhaled. He wanted to trust Kisame. From the bottom of his heart he wanted to put his trust in this man. To know that he wouldn't do the things Shisui had done when he was alive. And to know that his death wouldn't be tethered to anything alcohol related. But he hadn't fully recovered from the death of his cousin just yet. The pain was still raw every time he thought of his bubbly demeanor and comforting smile. Although he did well to push the last memories he and Shisui shared together, any mention of drinking and alcohol brought everything back to the surface again.
Kisame rose to his feet and walked a few steps so that he was standing in front of Itachi. He stood so close that it was almost uncomfortable and Itachi had to crane his neck slightly to meet his eyes. "Trust me. That's all I ask. Just, trust me."
"Okay." He said.
The upperclassman exhaled in relief. "I won't let you down, I promise."
Itachi wanted to believe him. He wanted to forget everything he'd overheard ten minutes ago when they ran into Kisame's roommates. And more than anything, he wanted to let go of all the pain he still held from Shisui's death.
But he couldn't. And if it meant telling Kisame what he wanted to hear so they could get on with their work today, then so be it.
-8-8-8-
"Are you sure you're okay with us inviting Shisui's parents over, Itachi?" Mikoto asked over dinner Friday night.
"That's fine." He murmured. She had asked him the same question the night before over dinner and his answer remained unchanged since then. If he was being honest with himself, it wasn't fine. He didn't want to see his father's dark curly hair or his mother's warm smile. It would dredge up too many painful memories. But what was he supposed to tell his mother? "No, I don't want them over because I'm not over Shisui's death yet?"
Shisui was Kagami and Megumi's only child. To spend Easter without him would no doubt be hard on them. Harder than it would be for Itachi to see their faces after so long. Surely Mikoto had already extended an offer and was expecting them to show up on their doorstep on Sunday. If Itachi said no, she'd have to call them back and retract her proposal. So he pretended that everything would be fine even though he wasn't quite sure if he could handle this right now. Not with everything else that was currently happening in his life back at school.
He still hadn't figured out how to make amends with Deidara after so long and now he was expected to remain friends with another potential at-risk alcoholic who would die the moment Itachi fully let his guard down around him. And he couldn't bear to lose another friend that way.
"At least sit with us through dinner and you can go up to your room if you like afterwards, okay honey?" Mikoto asked.
She had the best of intentions and while it still wasn't ideal, it made the arrangement seem more manageable to him. "Thanks."
Mikoto smiled and returned her gaze to her dinner plate. "Are you still tutoring that classmate of yours?" Itachi nodded. "How's that going?"
He waited to finish chewing the rice in his mouth and answered "It's going well." The sudden change in topic was to serve as a distraction, Itachi knew.
"What's this man's major?" Their father asked him.
"Physical education." Fugaku Uchiha liked short answers that were straight to the point. If he wanted clarification he would ask for it.
"Physical education," he repeated. After a moment of thought he nodded. "You said you shared a class with this man?"
"Yes. Introduction to Philosophy."
Another nod. A nod was neither a good sign nor a bad sign. It only signified that Fugaku had processed the information he had been given and had come to a conclusion regarding it. "And you tutored him then as well?"
"I did. Yes."
"Hm." A contemplative grunt this time as he sliced the meat off the pork chop bone before him. "Does he play in any sports on campus?"
It was Itachi's turn to nod this time. "He's a part of the swim team, yes."
A nod coupled with another grunt. "I see. Reminds me of my days on the football team." He smiled fondly, a rarity. "Your mother used to help me study back when we were still dating. Do you remember those days, Mikoto?"
Mikoto blushed and playfully batted her husband in the arm. "How could I ever forget?"
"Can I be done now?" Sasuke interrupted.
"Yes, you can go." Fugaku permitted. "I remember those days like it was yesterday. You had those acid washed jeans and hoop earrings. Wore your hair in a high pony-tail too."
"That was the style back then!" She cried.
"If anyone needs me, I'll be upstairs!" Sasuke called over his shoulder from the kitchen.
But neither Mikoto nor Fugaku acknowledge him. They were too busy reminiscing about the "good old days" and fashion styles and musical bands in their prime.
Itachi didn't particularly care if he overheard any of their conversation while he finished his own meal. They spent little time talking about the early days of their relationship and focused more on the passing of time. A small part of him, however, wished that they would have spoken more about what it was like to fall in love with one another and if it was as smooth and idyllic as they made it out to be.
-8-8-8-
"I know that something happened between you and Deidara." Sasuke began.
There was no way around it anymore. Every time Itachi came home for any amount of time, Sasuke made certain to question his every relationship at college. It didn't matter if Itachi waited until he was ready to go to bed to escape the criticism and questions from his younger sibling because Sasuke didn't care if Itachi wanted to talk about it or not. And the more often it happened, the harder it became to come up with plausible lies that would satisfy Sasuke.
"He made a move on you, didn't he?" Sasuke asked when Itachi refused to answer. He had tried ignoring him before too and it never worked. Sasuke would find new questions to ask of him until he couldn't stand it anymore.
"Sasuke what are you hoping to gain from asking me about this?" Itachi finally asked. "You do this every time I come home. You always ask if Deidara and I have 'hooked up yet' or if we've 'kissed.' What are you expecting me to say?"
Sasuke wasn't oblivious to Itachi's increasing frustration. He was aware that his older brother was getting annoyed with him. He just didn't care and persisted. "Because I saw the way he looked at you the day we helped you move your stuff down there. He likes you."
This was growing out of control. He needed to put a stop to this now or Sasuke would never quit. "That may be but that doesn't mean he'll be 'putting any moves on me' any time soon."
"What happened? Did you say something to him?"
"I simply told him that I was not interested in people who are the same gender as I am." Itachi offered.
"So you told him you're straight basically?"
Itachi sighed and stalked the length of the room to where his book bag sat at the foot of his bed. "Sure." If he didn't say something, Sasuke would only continue to nag him until he did.
"What did he do to you?" Sasuke asked.
"Nothing." He lied and pulled out the novel he was currently reading from his book bag. He had tried this tactic before: pretend to be engrossed in something and hope that he'll take the hint. The success rate was still low. "I simply put a stop to any feelings he might have had for me before he could say or do anything. That's all." He shrugged.
Unlike their father, Sasuke didn't nod in understanding or grunt when given new information to process. He simply stared at the object of his interest and quietly scrutinized them, much like Itachi and their mother did. When he reached a satisfying conclusion, he would either walk away or pose a new question. "So what's up between you and that athlete guy?"
If it wasn't one thing, it was another. "Nothing. Sasuke." Itachi said. "And why must you assume that everyone I come into contact with has some hidden agenda?"
Sasuke's eyes widened in offense. "I'm not assuming that he has a hidden agenda. I wanted to know what happened between you guys between spring break and now."
"What makes you think that?" Itachi asked. He was curious to know how his younger brother managed to pick up on something so minute and what evidence he had to back up his claim.
"The other week when you brought him up at dinner with mom you made it sound like you guys were friends. Now you sound like you can't stand the guy. What happened?"
He could spare to indulge Sasuke in the truth, he decided. "He and I don't share the same ideals."
"Like…what?"
He was hoping he wouldn't have to explain himself but apparently all of Sasuke's friends were too busy to text him and Itachi's relationships was the next most entertaining thing. "I wanted him to get a head start on his homework last week but he preferred to spend the weekend getting drunk with friends."
"So?" Sasuke asked. "Not everyone is a total nerd like you, Itachi. I don't blame him for wanting to have fun over the weekend instead of being cooped up in the library doing math drills or whatever it is you do with him."
Unbelievable. "Sasuke." Itachi said.
"What?" He was oblivious.
"You realize that Shisui's idea of 'fun' was going out drinking with friends and look what happened."
Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Shisui died because a drunk driver crossed over into his lane when he was on his way to a party. He didn't die of alcohol poisoning, Itachi." He said matter-of-factly.
"Do you realize how often Shisui drank?"
"No and I don't care! Alcohol didn't kill him and you're acting like it's the root of all evil!"
"Mom could have died because of dad's reckless behavior under the influence! Shisui could have been the drunk driver who swerved into the wrong lane! You're lucky to have been born without any complications because of the accident that mom was in!"
"And that's the thing!" Sasuke cried and quickly turned his head to the closed door. "That's the thing!" He hissed, softer now that his parents could overhear and demand to know what the siblings were arguing over so late at night. "Dad got help and doesn't drink anymore; mom's alive; and I'm alive and I wasn't born without any complications. It sucks that Shisui died the way he did and I hope Danzo whatever his name was who killed him rots in jail for taking him away from us but life goes on! If you wanna be friends with an athlete, be friends with an athlete! But just because the man drinks doesn't mean he's going to end up dead in a ditch somewhere because of it! God!"
"You don't know that!" Itachi shot back.
"And you don't either which is why it's stupid to assume that you can't be friends just because he likes to go out drinking with his friends! A lot of people drink and they don't all end up dead or in car accidents or anything like that!" He fumed. "Everybody makes mistakes; nobody's perfect. Not even you, Itachi."
Although he was only thirteen years old, Sasuke spoke like a mature adult and made some valid points. Conclusions Itachi would have reached if his judgement wasn't clouded with feelings of guilt and unresolved trauma from thirteen years ago when Sasuke was born. Hearing Sasuke's words made Itachi realize just how foolish he sounded and how stubborn he'd been. It was preposterous to assume that Kisame wouldn't drink or that he would go down the same road as Shisui when he was still alive. Even though Shisui wasn't driving under the influence when he died, Itachi worried that he would have eventually been in Danzo Shimura's shoes. That he would kill somebody's cousin, or friend because he was too drunk to drive and too stubborn to admit it. And even though Itachi couldn't change the past, he could prevent himself from going through the same thing with Kisame by not allowing himself to grow so close to him.
"Itachi," Sasuke spoke, bringing Itachi back to reality, "if Shisui could hear you right now, what do you think he'd say?"
"Don't isolate yourself, Itachi. Don't assume that everyone's going to make the same mistakes that I made. Because if you do, you're going to lead a very lonely, miserable life." Is what Shisui would say. He might not have possessed the best judgment in the months prior to his death, but when it came to Itachi, he always knew the right words to say.
Itachi released a shaky breath. When had he strayed so far? And what was he planning to accomplish by isolating those around him just because they liked to consume alcoholic beverages?
First Deidara, whom he'd unjustly hurt with his words, and now Kisame, the person who seemed to understand him the best since Shisui's death, the person he was planning to push out of his life?
"I know it's been hard for you since he died," Sasuke suddenly appeared by his side and wrapped an arm around his older brother's shoulders, "but you can't distance yourself from everyone because of what happened to him when he was alive or what happened between mom and dad thirteen years ago! You gotta let go and move on with your life."
"I know…" He whispered. And he did. He now knew what he needed to do to remedy things and the first step was to learn how to be more open with those around him.
"And if you ever forget that, just ask yourself what Shisui would say if he were here. Okay?"
"I will." He smiled and looked up to meet his younger brother's eyes.
"Good." Sasuke smiled in returned and leaned forward to embrace his older brother. "And Itachi?"
"Yes, Sasuke?"
"I don't think Deidara was really your type."
"What?"
Sasuke smirked. "You say you told him you weren't homosexual, which, by the way, is more offensive than saying 'gay'"
"Make your point."
"But anyways, you say you told him you weren't into him and I don't doubt that. He didn't look like he was your type."
"What are you getting at?"
"But I wouldn't write off that athlete you've been talking about. Even if nothing ever happens between you two, at least try to remain friends, alright?"
"Yeah."
With a final pat on the back, Sasuke rose to his feet and pulled his cellphone from the pocket of his sweat pants. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight, Itachi." He called over his shoulder and exited the room.
Unlike their father, Itachi did not nod in understanding or grunt when presented with new information. Like his mother and Sasuke, he liked to sit back and quietly analyze the situation at hand until he came to his own conclusion. Unlike his mother and brother, however, he liked to respond with a noncommittal "yeah" if only to stall for more time and appease the person he was speaking to.
"But I wouldn't write off that athlete you've been talking about. Even if nothing ever happens between you two, at least try to remain friends, alright?"
What was he insinuating just now? That he was homosexual—gay and had feelings for Kisame? That Kisame was more of his "type" as opposed to Deidara?
What did he even think Itachi's type was and on what basis?
Long after Sasuke had left the room, Itachi lay awake staring at the ceiling, trying to determine the underlying message in his little brother's words.
It wasn't entirely impossible. Kisame was attracted to both men and women. But he had mentioned the other day when they went out that he had his eye on someone who didn't know it yet.
It would be stupid to exercise the notion of a possible romance with Kisame if he had his eyes on someone else. In addition to that, Itachi wasn't gay. That much was for certain.
I'm anxious to hear what y'all's opinions of this turn of events will be lol. I can't say I know exactly how the next chapter will pan out or when I'll get around to updating it...I have a bit of a busy summer and many things to do before the semester resumes in late August. I had plans for some of the upcoming events in the story but after reading some of the reviews you have been leaving (not that they're bad reviews! I really appreciate them!) I'm wondering if I should tweak my story line a little bit...I'll reveal why closer to the end which is fast approaching! The story has to get through the end of March, all of April and the beginning of May before the school year ends for Itachi, Kisame, Deidara and Sasori! It'll be here before you know it!
Until next time,
Itachi's Husband
*SHOUT OUTS*
****To Absolute Anarchy: In your last review, you asked if Kisame was suggesting what you think he's suggesting. I suppose this time you'll ask me if Sasuke's suggesting what you think he's suggesting! And I know I mentioned storm but I think this chapter was more of a flash flood. You know, where it rains a shit-ton and the creeks overflow and it downpours for like 20 minutes and stops? #FlashFlood And at least Sasori wasn't being a dick again! :D That's something!