See you Later, Eren Chapter 10
Title: The Second Battle of Trost
WOOOP WE GOT IT ON SUNDAY FRIENDS. Granted, it is late Sunday, but that's as good as I expected it. For those who want me to address the new guidebook, I'll say this: it's very nice, reaffirming so much EM. It, along with absolutely no mention of the added pages, makes everything far more confusing, but it is what it is I suppose.
Anyways, this is a big milestone. Chapter 10! And, we just hit 100K words! Not much else to say, so I hope you enjoy! -Y
Response to Byakko- 179: Thank you very much! I've always loved the concept of time travel fics, so it means a lot to know you hold mine as one of your favorites. I hope this chapter satisfies some of your questions! I have also heard about that High School Castes AU theory, and I very much want to believe it and will probably do so until the pages are or are not shown in the anime, just for the sake of my mental health. As for how likely it is, I'm not sure and I honestly don't care, imma believe it. Thank you so much for the kind review!
Response to r3wr1t3r: There's not much I can say about your thoughts on the added pages other than the fact that I completely agree with you! I've written and seen so many essays on twitter and reddit on why these are such bad additions, and I completely empathize with the way this has diminished the story for you. I've gotten a lot of messages saying that my fanfic is their last hope with this and while it is scary to be placed on this pedestal to an extent, I completely understand these thoughts. For me, this story is also my salvation. It's a way to conclude the story in a more satisfying manner, and I hope if gives you solace that I'm not going for anything too ambitious with this fic, I simply want to see these characters happy, so that is what you will get in the end haha. I honestly don't think even the added pages could stop me from loving EM, because at the end of the day I can just pretend they never happened and that's relatively easy for me. I can't imagine how hard it is for others. As for the review, thank you so much for your thoughts! You checking every Sunday makes me sad that I've disappointed you with my lack of updates, but also so happy that I have such dedicated readers as you! I'm glad you liked all the dynamics and new moments shown in this chapter, and yes! You were right, RBA have changed course and many questions remain as to the how and the why, and hopefully you'll gain some more insight with this chapter, so enjoy!
Response to UnbredEel0: Well, Ackermans and their abilities/significance clearly aren't a thing the Scouts are aware of, so that excuse is about as believable as anything else from their perspective. Also, I appreciate your advice! It feels like I can keep this weekly schedule going for the foreseeable future, but we'll see how easy or hard it gets way down the line, as I am very far from being finished with the story.
Response to SpiralNemesis: Thank you so much for the review! I'm thankful that you reminded me how you were too busy actually reading the story to critique some of the minutia of the writing, as I tend to write as if every reader is going to pay attention to those little things, and I get stressed as a result. Words like yours remind me to take a step back and chill out a little haha. I love your description of "the singularity," and I think it is rather apt. Compared to the chapters we've been getting, the result of our characters' choices are beginning to come to a head. I hope you enjoy!
Response to kaffeenator666: Oh boy long review = long response. It's good to have you back with the great review! I was quite surprised to hear that you actually liked the 8 pages, though it seems like it's less out of a belief that the pages were actually good in any substantial way, and more because it's humorous to see a story that was already destroyed by 139 to you be further demolished. As far as Armin being successful, to me the question was never really about whether it was the most realistic thing in the world for him to succeed in peace negotiations, what mattered was the message I was left with. Either a hopeful ending or a hopeless ending could have been good, but the ending of 139 pretty much gave a moral of "human conflict will never end, but we can always strive for a better future for future generations" and in those added pages, that was thrown away. I didn't really view it as a binary. Armin might have achieved world peace, Paradis might have been completely destroyed, but I thought it was more likely to be somewhere in the middle, such is the way of life. The important part is the fact that he is trying, and the conclusion of his endeavors being left up in the air is what makes the theme so powerful to me, which was why I didn't like these pages lol. Disregarding my feelings, I think we can all say that at least Yams shouldn't have spent so much time wanking Armin if he was going to completely fail. I disagree that thematic questions remained unclear, and that unresolved elements of the story was the vibe Yams was going for, but debating themes is probably too arbitrary for us to get into. As for the Jean and Mikasa marriage, it seems we completely agree on how dumb it is, you just like it because it's simply so absurd and nothing matters anymore, which I can respect haha. I wonder how the 139 Eren breakdown feels dumb to you, as to me it was a powerful, if awkwardly written, scene. But with knowing the added pages it just seems all the more pathetic. Although, I'll have to hard disagree with the "asian pussy" thing. This was about his love for Mikasa and how he refused to involve her in his genocidal plans in any capacity so as to absolve her of the terrible guilt and sin of such an act. This isn't about being horny my guy. Though if that's how I interpreted it, I'd think it was a bad scene too. He was stuck between an impossible decision of having her live a long and happy life thanks to the Rumbling or confessing and being with her for the short time he had left, only for her and his other friends to be bombed. Turns out they were bombed anyways but I'm disregarding that. This wasn't just about "why didn't Eren just get some cooch lmao," and I thought that was pretty clear. We can agree that Yams is not good at romance, though. I bought the "2000 year love" vibe but it could have been done far better, no denying that. I find it strange that you say the 8 pages somehow elucidate what was so bad about 139 to begin with. If that were the case, wouldn't it double down on the themes established in that final chapter? Instead, it reverses and demolishes them, making nothing at all worth it. Coming from a perspective that enjoyed 139, perhaps I'm just not in a place where I can understand, but I appreciate your thoughts! It's very interesting hearing from a "Yeagerist" as, believe it or not, they're not the type I surround myself with haha. I feel like I have a greater understanding of your perspective on the matter.
Also, I've seen the romance guide and interview. Not the most appetizing stuff, no doubt about that. It's just so contradictory I don't know what to think. Anyways, yep haha, Mikasa's plan is pretty dumb, she even acknowledged as much in the chapter. I won't say much as to RBA's plans, but you'll be getting some insight soon. Mikasa's thoughts towards her love are a tricky thing to write. I feel that on some level she feels like she's handling a building that's one brick away from collapse, and anything she does could indirectly result in everything falling apart. Though things seem to be changing at a faster pace than she expected. You're right in saying this is the fork way, this is what determines how successful Mikasa truly was in maintaining the past and how difficult her task will be in securing the future. Overall, thank you for your thoughts both on the pages and on my story. I argued with you a bit and would be happy to know what you thought, but a part of me is happy that Yams is finally done fucking with this story so I can write this in peace. I hope you enjoy this next chapter!
Response to dareaderreads: Oh my god, how do we operate on the exact same wavelength haha! Accepting it as non canon has been my strategy and though on some days it's difficult, most of the time I can love EM just as much as I used to. I would love to see the anime fix a lot of the pacing and execution issues with 139, but my main stress is whether they will adapt the added pages at all. Them not being addressed in any capacity through interviews and the guidebook makes things confusing. Thank you so much for your thoughts on the chapter as well! I'm glad I was able to capture the essence of Mikasa's anxiety for you, as it is the main emotional hook that I've tried to bring people in with these first chapters, though that will begin to change. I'm happy you picked up on Mikasa's overconfidence as well. I mostly based that element of her character off of the one scene after Eren's "death" in Trost where she says "I'm strong, stronger than all of you." It hints at her security in her own strength while also being a situation where she's extremely distraught due to Eren's death. I interpreted it that in situations where Eren is involved and Mikasa is emotional, she's inclined to over-rely on her strength and her confidence in that strength to compensate for her weakening emotions, which was a character flaw I didn't really see solved in the manga so I wanted to address and use it here. Overall, I hope you enjoy this newest chapter!
No. Nonononono.
That's not Bertholdt. That's not the Colossal Titan.
Mikasa's eyes widen, her heart stops.
Eren gasps as the situation hits him. The Armored Titan is back.
"That's..." Connie lets out.
And they remain in stunned silence, watching the Titan's soulless orange eyes glow back at them from afar. Time goes on forever, and everything seems to freeze.
Until the pieces of armor that surround the shins come flying off. The Titan bends its knees for a single second, then breaks into a sprint. No... a charge. The wall they stand atop rattles with the thundering boom of Reiner's rapid footsteps. Each mighty crash into the green earth is like a hammer pounding on her own mind, pounding with the weight of the situation, and with each thud it dawns on her.
Reiner is coming to the gate.
Mikasa forces her feet forward, attaching the blades to her hilt and letting gravity pull her downwards. She hears Eren yell "Mikasa!" but it only pushes her further, reminds her of what is being threatened at this very moment. And strength flows through her.
The wind pulls at her hair and she feels her stomach rise, but it wakes her up, it tells her that yes, this is indeed happening. She's releasing the gas, slowing her descent as she runs down the side of the wall, and Reiner is already close to her. He's moving fast, but she has no time to think. Hooking into the shoulder, she propels herself at him with great inertia, aiming her blades at the crevice of exposed flesh that sits on his shoulder. He's right up to her. She swings, she cuts, and in an instant she's behind him, ignored as if she was a bug.
There's blood on her blades, but that's right. What's one cut to the side of the neck going to do?
Unabated, she lets her weight get pulled back, still attached to the fifteen meter battering ram. He's just barely moving slower than her gas, so she slowly but surely catches up to him, but it's not enough time. Before she can take another swing, he's right at the gate. It's right in his face and he's moving his shoulder in front of him, preparing for the direct hit.
"Stop-"
A terrible crack erupts in the air as the titan's speed continues, his movement continues, and the gate in front of him retreats inwardly, like solid walls aren't supposed to do. He is an unstoppable force, and it folds like paper, millions of fissures forming around the point of impact and expanding impossibly fast, eventually becoming part of the massive hole as...
Mikasa unhooks, sticking to the outer wall and gazing at Reiner's work. The gate has fallen.
The gate has fallen...
Mikasa's heart tumbles, it falls down to her stomach at terminal velocity. The gate has actually fallen. Not only that, but Bertholdt is still alive, Reiner's still alive, Annie's still alive. The all too familiar spark of electricity courses through her blood, shoots into every muscle and bone, and a thick, angry scowl forms on her face as she jumps, aligning her hooks on either side of the breach and shooting herself forward like a slingshot.
Reiner stands there kneeling, shrugging off the rubble that lays on his shoulders and in his hair. Hundreds of screams fill the city as people are scrambling to escape the shadow of the monster, and he begins to walk, not all that concerned with crushing anyone. The titans will do that for him.
She rockets towards him, releasing gas to hasten her descent as she aims at the gap in armor behind his knees. That's right, the knees, she thinks. Armor of antiquity, weak points, she can do this. Mikasa gives another deep swipe at the exposed left leg, flying through the space between his legs. But nothing. She turns around and sees him gazing right at her. Before he can try so much as a swing, she's soaring to a nearby building.
Nothing nothing nothing!
Her heart is giving thousands of beats per moment, yet it's sinking further and further. Reiner turns to face her, lifting his arm and hurling it towards her. It's far too slow, Mikasa dodging it easily, but it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. She can't kill him.
"Thunder spears... there are no thunder spears"
She flies towards him again, slicing the area under the arms. Once. Twice. Three times. Though he certainly reacts, it isn't enough to hinder his movements at all, there's too much armor. She remembers that the only reasons she was able to cripple him the last time she fought him like this was because Eren broke off a lot of the protective plating.
Yet, he's slow, too slow to even graze Mikasa. All they can do is trade ineffective blows, and it's not long before they both realize that.
"If I can cut him enough. He'll fall, he'll fall!" she insists to herself. Swinging low to nip at his exposed shin, her blades snap off from the use. It doesn't matter, she thinks, she has spares. "But what good are they doing?"
The Armored Titan seems to understand that this exchange is an exercise in futility, as he turns around, ignoring her, and walks over to the flimsy wooden barricades, only a few of which remain standing after his frontal assault. Landing on a chimney, Mikasa feels her blood push her towards him, every bone in her body insisting that she barrel at him with all her extraordinary strength, but her mind, the tactical side that always tries to make the best decision, halts her.
"What can you do? He doesn't react to your attacks. You're wasting gas, you're wasting blades, you're wasting strength, you're wasting time."
"I can kill Reiner."
"No, you can't."
She grips her hilt with fervent power, nearly breaking with the force of her hand, just like she broke her knife... that day. The day he saved her. She trembles in anger, in anxiousness, but she's powerless to the situation before her. That day, she could drive a dull knife right through the backside of a fully grown man. Even if it was impossible, she did it. But she can't do a damn thing. Armor is stronger than bone.
Why... what did she do? How did this happen? She was supposed to kill the Colossal Titan, but the Armored Titan is the only one in sight.
"Think, Mikasa. Think like Armin... they changed this. They did something different than last time. Why? Why?!"
She jumps from to rooftop to rooftop, keeping a solid set of eyes on Reiner as he pushes the barricades into the trenches. "If they didn't use Bertholdt, is it because they thought Reiner was the safer option? What would they have to worry about? Is it Ymir? Is it me?" Her eyes widen as a sickeningly dreadful thought latches onto her mind.
"Did they know...?"
They knew. They had to have.
"No... no... they-"
Eren.
Eren's in danger.
Mikasa's heart stops, and she's shooting through the air. She backflips, anchoring herself on Reiner's arm as she spirals around, cutting him with each twirl of her body. He tries to squish her like a mosquito, but she evades.
"How much does he know?" she ponders. Another dodge. "Does he know that I'm from the future?" Slice. "Does he know about Eren? About himself?" Slice. "Or does he just know I planned to kill him?"
He turns abruptly, in the direction of the rest of the city, and begins to trot. The shift knocks Mikasa off balance, and she tumbles downwards, catching herself before she lands on the ground. She gasps, realizing that he's no longer paying any heed to her. "Why? What's their plan? Use Bertholdt to destroy the inner gate?"
No. She-
The looming shadow of a titan's hand hovers over her, and in less than a second she dodges it's crushing swipe. The beast is grinning impossibly wide at her, but instead of killing it, she gives chase to Reiner.
"How did he know?"
"How did he know!?"
She rises, then plummets, the velocity taking her straight back to him. She feels her conviction, her confusion, her rage, all bubble up at once as she twirls and gives another slash at his neck.
"How..."
A long slash.
"Answer me..."
She slings around to the back of his neck, giving it a wide berth before cracking towards him like a whip.
"REEIINERRR!"
He turns his head, jutting his arms suddenly at her string. A split second too late, she notices, managing to unhook one of her grapples before he waves, cutting the other one at the wire. With that, she's crippled, hurdling to the ground, but slowing her descent with a well timed puff of gas as she shields her face from colliding with the stone walkway. She feels the wetness of blood somewhere on her head, but she has no mind for it, not with adrenaline and fear and fury coursing through her.
She turns, planting her hands on the ground to support her back as she stares up at the giant. Her body prepares itself for a sudden jump, ready to dodge Reiner's imminent attack. But it never comes. He doesn't try to squash her like the ladybug she is. He continues his movements forward, into the heart of the city.
She hurriedly stands, dusting the rocks and dirt off her bruised hands, but she notices the dangling wire that protrudes out of her harness. Cut off, unable to be retracted or shot out, unable to be commanded.
"You can't even chase him now. You failed."
"No... this... This can't be happening."
A loud stomp vibrates through her bones, and she turns around to see titans, a crowd of them, all wreaking havoc on the city around her. Screams pierce the air, buildings crumble and die, as do the ones who couldn't run fast enough. She failed.
Mikasa launches her remaining hook into the side of a sturdy building. She tries to adjust course with her gas, but with only one rope she falls too far to the right, and she grunts, slamming into the stone wall, but remaining. As she witnesses the devastation before her, only one thought flashes through her mind.
"I was supposed to stop this."
She wipes the blood from her forehead, wincing as her hand smooths over the cut.
"How did they know? Did Ymir tell them? What would she have to gain from doing that? I don't..." her mind buzzes in puzzlement, gauging whether the titans also know the future, or Ymir has something to do with it. "If Reiner and Annie knew the future, why would they wait? Why not kill Eren the second they get the chance? And why would they be interested in breaking the gate down? It doesn't make sense."
She begins to talk aloud. "If Ymir told them... but she wouldn't do that. Her priority is Historia! Then how did they know?!" She uses a puff of gas to allow herself to stand atop the building.
"They have the same goals as they did before... to breach Trost. So they don't know about the future or Eren, but, why are they doing things differently? The only thing that's changed is-..."
Her eyes widen.
Mikasa.
"Was I...?" she places a hand on her head, face stricken in self-inflicted horror. "Is it because I didn't trust them? Were they suspicious? Was Reiner their contingency?"
"It makes sense... the warriors know that both Bertholdt and Reiner are viable options. The only thing Reiner would be safe from that Bertholdt isn't is... me."
Nononono
She slams the side of her fist into the chimney that protrudes from the roof, with such a force that it chips off some of the surrounding stone. "You idiot! You stupid, stupid idiot! Eren is in danger! He could turn into a titan and it's your fault! You couldn't be bothered, you were too suspicious, you cared about Eren too much and... and now..."
Mikasa clasps a hand over her mouth, and tears swell behind her eyes. The rumbling, it's going to happen now, all because she wasn't herself enough. Eren will transform, he will seal the gate, he will join the Scouts and retake Shiganshina, he will learn the truth and leave her forever...
"What have I done..." her voice comes out in a choked whisper, eyes pleading to the black void of fate to make it stop.
Make it stop.
"All teams report to headquarters! The Armored Titan has broken the gate!"
"You've got to be shitting me."
All day. The entire, goddamn day, Ymir thought about what was about to happen. She kept an eye on Krista the whole time, just in case, but it was hard enough to answer her when she asked such questions as "Why are you sticking with me all day?" or "It's okay, Ymir, I can do this one myself" without being enclosed and attacked from all sides, attacked by the sheer pandemonium that was her mind. Mikasa's plan was batshit crazy, no doubt about it, and now there's definitive proof. That idiot. She really expected it to work?
Though, Ymir's no better. She rationalized it to herself, said that the shifters couldn't possibly know, that Mikasa is the strongest human being she's ever met, and that if anyone could do it, it was her. She may not be outmatched, but she could certainly be outplayed, it seems. They both could.
"The Armored Titan? Mikasa can't do a thing against that, if he really is coated in armor like they say. He's not threatened by anything Paradis could throw at him, besides another titan... me."
Her squad runs across the top of the wall in such an orderly manner, it makes her want to laugh. "You're all dead. You're all going to die, what's the point of this military structure, it'll fall apart within an hour."
She supposes she really should be thankful that she isn't terribly affected by this new development. Many will die, Mikasa might be dead already, and if what she said about Trost is true, Eren, and likely most if not all of the 104th, will die as well. A part of her has to admit, the thought of Mikasa being dead does fill her with a bit of sadness, and she can only guess that once the shock and adrenaline of the whole situation goes away, it will only hurt more. That girl was her most trusted ally, and one of her closest friends. But there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it now.
Her and Krista, they can run away, if worse comes to worst. Krista may not be the biggest fan of it, but she'll have to deal with it. If everyone dies and things go to utter shit, she'll reveal herself as a titan and ensure Krista's safety. That comes first, before she even thinks about fighting Reiner, she has to keep Krista safe.
"What the hell are you on about, Ymir? You idiot, you're gonna run straight into the same trap that cost you your life in Marley? Live only for yourself. What do you have to gain by risking your life for her?" she catches herself.
She knows the underground well, she can leave the Military and escape there-
"So you'll abandon Mikasa's plan? She trusted you with her life."
"Her mistake."
"Seriously? That's what all of this amounted to? If you didn't care at all, why did you join the Military? Why did you decide to help Mikasa?"
She glances to her left, at the considerably shorter blonde figure running beside her. She wears a great amount of worry on her face as she follows their squad, but Ymir bites back a snarl at the sight. Krista was never much of an actor, and Ymir knows that the blonde is probably going to try and take this as her opportunity to "prove herself," to validate her existence through self sacrifice, as if it was anyone else's goddamn job to do something like that.
She won't let her do that. Everything else be damned.
"You wanted... to become friends with me?" Krista's words at the mountain crash into her mind, and she sighs.
"Shit..." Ymir mutters.
"Huh? Ymir, are you okay?" Krista asks, a truly concerned look on her face.
"You can take a guess if you want..."
"Now isn't the time for sarcasm!"
"There's no better time for s-"
"Troops! To reach HQ, we'll cut through the market. Engage your ODM gear!" the shaky voice of their superior calls out.
The zipping sound is sudden and loud as the many cadets hook onto the buildings, and then a dozen puffs of gas shoot from behind them. As Ymir flies through the market, she keeps a fair distance behind Krista, ready to barrel into her should something come and threaten her life. Sure, it's a blatant risk to her own life, and the titans haven't even reached this area of town yet, but she's acting entirely on impulses at this point.
However, it isn't long before a figure standing on a nearby rooftop catches Ymir's eye. Upon recognizing it, she's flushed with an unearthed relief, followed by confusion, and then a clarity and indignation. Of course, that figure is Mikasa.
She shoots to the left, plotting a direct course to the building as she hears Krista's confused voice call out to her. And then another, separate puff of gas. She's following her.
As she approaches, she can make out the raven haired girl's face more definitively. Her eyes are slant, hinting at a deep exhaustion, and the dirt and blood on her face do much to corroborate that. Clearly, she's just made it out of some sort of battle, but seeing how titan blood evaporates, it's clear that she's cut her own forehead somewhere along the way.
Things have not gone well.
Landing on the roof, Ymir gives her a penetrating glare, which Mikasa doesn't even react to. So, as Krista lands to Ymir's side, the thud of her feet landing on the tiled roof ringing throughout the air, the freckled girl looks at the gaping hole that sits at the apex of the wall, where the entrance once was.
Krista gasps. "Mikasa, are you okay? You're bleeding!" she runs up to the girl, holding one of her arms. Mikasa places a hand on hers, nodding. "I'm fine."
The blonde lets out a light sound of worry, not believing Mikasa's unimpressive response, but before she can say anything else, Ymir raises her voice.
"I take it this wasn't part of the plan."
Mikasa glances at her. "They must have known about me."
"What? What do you mean 'known about you?'" Krista asks. She's ignored.
"Clearly. So plan B won't work, either."
Krista blinks. "Plan B-"
"No. I searched all around. There's no trace of any of them. The element of surprise is gone."
"Shit..."
"Ymir, Mikasa! What are you talking about?"
Ymir sighs, turning to Krista. "We'll tell you once all this is over with, but not right now." A lie, most likely. "Well, Mikasa, what's your plan. Do you even have one?"
Mikasa maintains her glare, causing Ymir to let out a morbid chuckle.
"We should have finished this years ago, idiot."
Mikasa doesn't respond nor react. It's clear that Ymir's words aren't helping, but she can't resist. Things have gone so, so horribly wrong and Ymir was right the whole time. She wants to laugh. Laugh it off and say "your loss, Mikasa" but she can't. She promised to help. She promised to help her friend and Krista would be in even more danger if they abandoned it all now.
Really, how was Mikasa supposed to expect Reiner would crash through instead of Bertholdt? That means they really did suspect she knew something, which Ymir wouldn't have guessed herself in a hundred years without her telling her directly, which she did. It would take someone extremely clever to even notice Mikasa's behavior, let alone take it to this extreme. Those warriors are smart, but are they that smart? A small sliver of compassion broods within Ymir, but she's far too angry to say anything about it now. She knows the only reason Mikasa didn't kill them was... well, she doesn't know. There's too much she's keeping from the brunette.
"There's no point in regretting it now. We have new priorities."
"Maybe you do," she mutters, turning around to lean her head on the chimney. Ymir knows Eren is Mikasa's priority. It always has been and it always will be.
"Ymir, please. People are going to die."
She rubs her eyes. "I'll try to bite off his armor. It's the best we got at this point." She sees Krista's face contort in utter perplexity. Mikasa shakes her head.
"He cut off my wire, so I couldn't chase him. I don't know where he is right now. And, if they know about me, they could know about you, too. It'd be suicide."
Ymir scoffs. "At this point, the only thing that wouldn't be suicide is running away-"
"If they break the inner gate, Wall Rose will fall, and we'd be doomed."
"Are you talking about the titans?" Krista finally pipes up. Mikasa gives her a nod in return.
"So what? Play things out like you did last time? What makes you think it'll go any differently?"
Mikasa is about to respond when a fourth clunk echoes on the roof. It's one of their superiors, a thick frown, halfway between worry and annoyance, on his face. "You three, report to HQ immediately! That's an order!" Begrudgingly, Ymir, Mikasa, and Krista follow him.
"I'll look for the other two. Bertholdt and Annie have to be somewhere. Do whatever it is you plan to do, I don't give a shit anymore, just remember what you promised me," Ymir says while they're in the air, which Mikasa nods to.
"This is either the best decision I've ever made, or the worst mistake of my life" she remembers saying to herself a year ago.
"Looks like it's the latter..." the wind is too loud for anyone to hear her.
"You trainees have all passed the final training exercise, and now are full-fledged soldiers. We expect great things from you!" An instructor shouts at the frantic scene of trainees running around from place to place like ants about to be stepped on. No one seems to listen, least of all Eren, who's just arrived with Mina, Thomas, Samuel, Sasha, and Connie. They said their brief farewells as they went to get fully geared up and situated with their squads, awaiting orders, but right now Eren is still looking for his best friend.
This is it. Now is finally their chance to fight back against the titans. The Armored Titan running through was certainly the last thing he expected, but a part of him is glad that it happened, as now he'll finally get to use his training. Upon realizing these thoughts, he quickly shuts them down, recognizing that many people will die, many who are about as capable of fighting back as he was three years ago. They're helpless, but at least this time it's different. This time, they'll defend Trost and they'll win, even without the Scouts here to help.
He scurries from corridor to corridor, searching for his friend as he shifts between the many moving bodies of his fellow trainees. He thinks about how they all came here in a hurry, how in a matter of half an hour or so, the headquarters went from lightly occupied by mostly instructors and officers to every soldier in and around Trost, which was quite a bit of people due to the graduation of the 104th taking place here. If Eren didn't know any better, he'd say this was more than just a big coincidence, that the titans somehow knew there'd be so many cadets here, so as to maximize the casualties. In fact, thinking about it now, it was strange that the Armored Titan appeared out of nowhere...
Then again, maybe it didn't. He scrunches his eyebrows in annoyance, frustrated at himself that, at the time, he was too focused on what Mikasa was doing, too fixed on her face when she turned around to look at him, that he didn't even notice exactly how the Armored Titan appeared there. He could have sworn there was some bright yellow flash, and if the titan really had just waltzed out of the woods that were kilometers away from the wall, they surely would have noticed before it broke out into a sprint. But thanks to his stupidity, he'll never know for sure. The others didn't seem to be paying that much attention either, but who would?
Mikasa... she was paying attention. At least it looked that way, now that Eren thinks about it.
As he makes it to the gas dispensary, where many soldiers are working on assembly for the gas tanks, Eren darts his head around the area, no one with the signature blond hair in sight. He sighs. Armin is short, so even picking him out amidst a sea of people is a challenging task. He sees someone with a similar height, momentarily perking up, but realizes it's simply Hannah, the lit torch on a nearby wall casting just the right amount of light on her hair to make it seem the right color.
She's currently being held by Franz, and she rattles in his embrace. He doesn't look to be in the most stable of moods either, but he appears to be consoling her nonetheless. Eren can't stop a scowl from forming on his face. "Now is not the time to be like that! Titans are invading while you two hug and kiss," he thinks to himself, only not saying it aloud because they're too far away to possibly hear him and Armin would tell him to keep it to himself.
For some reason, though, he can't stop staring at them. Even though they face real danger, possibly death, they look... comforted, in a strange way. Like if this was their last moment, they'd be happy, because at least they got to embrace one last time.
One last time...
Eren's eyes widen. Where is Mikasa? The thought just popped into his head, but he hasn't seen her since she jumped off the wall to engage in battle against the Armored Titan. He wanted to join her in the fight, but Sasha stopped him, saying that it was too dangerous. He was about to protest at the time, but before he had the chance, the gate was busted open, and him and his friends all tumbled to the ground due to the vibrations it caused.
And after that, she made chase, and was lost in the frenzy. Eren was too focused on coming to the realization that titans were invading again to think about it, simply trusting that Mikasa was skilled enough to, if not defeat the Armored Titan outright, at least escape when the situation got bad. But now... she's still not here. She's been gone for thirty minutes and she's not back. And he's looking for Armin?!
He feels his heart rate escalate, pounding against his chest despite the fierce resistance from his mind. "She's fine, she's Mikasa! She can handle a titan or two, easily."
But tell that to his heart. Now he's darting his head around, searching for a whole new figure. This one just as tall as him, but somehow so small. She's so small and fragile, no one knows it except him, and for some damn reason that's all he can think about as he questions if she's actually okay. Her night black hair, her unusually pale skin, he'd see it from a million miles away but he can't find a thing. She's not here.
"It's okay, she's in another room, you just have to look."
But, because the world is funny sometimes, as he turns around to go right back from where he came, he sees Armin. He's kneeled by the wall, fruitlessly trying to connect a tank of gas to a nozzle. Both items shake in either hand, and watching the pieces barely connect, only to fly apart with an involuntary shake is almost frustrating to Eren. He kneels down with him, laying a hand on his shoulder to both support his friend and steady his movements.
"Armin..." even the words seem to scare him. His face is fixed unnaturally upon the metal contraptions in his hands, practically starting at the reflection that mocks him, showing him just how frightened he is. After no response, Eren raises his voice, worry coming in thicker than he had intended.
"Are you okay, Armin?"
"I-I'm fine." His voice is strained, strangled by the air. "I'll get over it soon enough. B-But we're in bad shape."
Eren hears steps behind him, but he's too focused on listening to his best friend.
"We currently don't have the means to quickly patch an eight-meter hole... we never even managed to dig up that big rock near the front gate! Since we can't seal the hole, we'll have to abandon the town. A-And it's only a matter of time before they breach Wall Rose! Besides, they can wipe out humanity whenever they want, anyway! What's the p-"
Eren interrupts his growing tangent, seeing no end. He grabs his hand roughly, yelling "Armin!" and shocking him out of his rambling.
"Calm down... Remember, things are different now. Humanity won't be defeated by the Titans anymore!" he shakes Armin to silence.
After a moment of irregular breaths from the boy, he speaks up in a whisper. "I'm sorry... I'm alright..."
Eren's not convinced. Who would be? He's ready to fill Armin with more words, to give him the hope that courses through him, but he's interrupted by a voice he didn't realize he was so desperate to hear.
"Armin, Eren..."
"Mikasa!" he says as he turns around, shock and relief filling his voice. Armin looks behind him as well, but doesn't get up to move. Eren grabs her arms, and she lets him. "Are you okay? You ran after the Armored Titan and didn't come back."
"I'm okay, Eren. I-"
He stops her, running a finger across her forehead where dried blood and a stinging cut now sit. "You hit your head! Are you okay to..." he trails off, fighting his inner self. "Of course she's okay to fight, it's just a scratch, Eren. Now, of all times, is not the time to worry so much about her!" he mentally berates himself at even considering the notion that Mikasa stay out of the fight because of a head cut. She's the most capable warrior he knows, but at the same time he wishes she could just sit it all out. No, actually he doesn't wish that. Well, he's going back and forth on it. But he knows what's best, in the end.
He just can't help it.
"Eren, really. It's just a cut. We'll be getting a lot of those." She gives him a steady yet reassuring look, and Eren is quick to acquiesce.
"Right. You're right. Are you fully equipped?"
"I just refilled my gas. I would have been here sooner, but the Armored Titan cut one of my wires with its hardened skin."
Eren widens his eyes, shocked at the idea that it's smart enough to realize the importance of wires and cut it off.
"That means... it not only knew the gates are the weak point of the walls, but that wires are vital for our transportation..." Armin lets out, finally standing, albeit very unsteadily.
"The captain has summoned us to the courtyard, we're about to be sent out," Mikasa says.
Eren speaks up. "Let's go, then." He places a hand on Armin, and the blond boy tries at determined nod, though it's clear he's trying to convince himself as much as he is Eren and Mikasa.
They walk through the corridors, a bit less crowded now that the captain has congregated them all into one place, but still busy enough for the clamor of metal and the voices of many worried soldiers to be heard.
"E-Eren, Mikasa... I've been thinking about what's going to happen and... I'm asking you not to risk your lives for me."
Eren's breath hitches, and Mikasa appears to have a similar reaction to his words, grabbing his arm and letting out "Armin."
Armin looks unsettled, more than he was earlier, as he forms his words. "I mean, if I'm in trouble, help me out. This mostly goes for you Eren, since we'll be in the same squad. I only mean, if you have to sacrifice your life to save me, don't."
Now it's Mikasa's turn to look extremely unsettled. Eren, of course, is disturbed by this conversation too, but he doesn't pay it as much mind, knowing that Armin's always been one to undervalue himself. He's not going to actually heed whatever his friend has to say, because he knows it comes from a place of fear and self-loathing.
"Armin, we're going to help you out. No matter what it takes. We promised to see the outside world together, didn't we?" he reminds him.
"We did, but... I don't know what will happen after today. I don't know if I'll die, but... I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen. I wish I did."
Eren sighs, but Mikasa takes ahold of Armin's hand. "You don't know what's going to happen. None of us do. But you won't die."
"How can you be so sure?"
Mikasa lets go of Armin's hand, looking back ahead of her and stepping through the large doors. Eren keeps his eyes fixed on the scene before him, unsure of what Mikasa means by her words. Armin, for once, looks just as confused as him.
"We're here," she says.
The courtyard is filled with people, all maintaining their salutes and wearing their signature cadet uniform. Another similarity: they are all afraid. Even the captain.
"Just follow your training! Split into groups! Under the Garrison's orders, you will resupply combatants, relay orders, and kill titans! Garrison intercept forces will form the vanguard! Trainees, led by the supply team, will compromise the middle guard! The Garrison's elite forces will form the rearguard! Also, messengers report that the advance team has been neutralized."
Eren's eyes widen. "Already? Neutralized?"
"The outer gate has been compromised, and titans have entered the city. In other words, the Colossal Titan may appear at any time to destroy the inner gate, and the Armored Titan is still at large, unlocated at this time!
"You're kidding..." Eren hears the stressed voice of Thomas let out.
"If we lose Rose, too..." another boy says.
"Silence! As we speak, the vanguard is engaging them. We have but one objective in this fight: to defend Wall Rose with our lives until the evacuation is complete!"
This speech doesn't exactly inspire confidence. Not that Eren needs it, but he can see many of his comrades' faces fall. To be safe, the captain finishes it off.
"Also, as you are all surely aware, desertion in the face of the enemy is punishable by death. Mark this well, and fight to your last dying breath! Dismissed!"
"Yes, sir!" the crowd, not filled with any hope or conviction, overcompensates in the form of their salute, shouting it to the top of their lungs. And suddenly, they're running. In every conceivable direction, cadets are running and chaos ensues.
Eren paces to where his gear is stationed, lost in thought as he does so. He can hear the people he grew up with, fought with, and suffered with, screaming and vomiting and whispering "no... no... no..." under their breaths. Many collapse from the dread, and it makes Eren sick. This is what the titans do to people, this is what the possibility of death does to people. Eren understands, but he cannot empathize. As a soldier, it's his job to make it so this doesn't happen to any helpless civilian ever again. And one day, not even soldiers will have to feel this fear. They'll be free. He'll attack as much as he has to until he never has to see so many fearful for their lives again. That is what he wants, that is free-
Eren rams into Jean with a thud, and they both grunt, looking up to see who they've knocked themselves into in their stupor.
Jean's surprised face quickly fades into a frown, and he moves him with his arm. "You're in the way."
Eren frowns back, turning around. "Don't tell me Jean's crippled by fear, too."
"Hey, Jean... What's wrong?" he asks.
"'What's wrong?' Unlike you, I don't have a death wish!" he grabs Eren by the collar, shouting. He finds himself letting it happen, hearing what Jean has to say.
"Since you wanted to join the Survey Corps, I'm sure you're ready to become titan food anytime! But I was going to the interior tomorrow!"
"Calm down!"
"I'm supposed to stay calm and die?"
"No!" he gets back his footing and pushes Jean into a pillar. "Don't forget those three years of hell we endured!"
Jean gasps, his face taken aback.
Eren continues. "In the past three years, we almost died so many times... Some of us really did die. Some ran, and some were kicked out. But we made it! Didn't we? So we can make it through today!"
There's silence around the courtyard.
"You'll survive today, and go to the interior tomorrow, right?" he finally lets the tall boy go, but he's stunned into place for a second. He eventually gains his bearings, cursing under his breath. He turns around the pillar and walks away, ushering Daz to move up with him.
Eren lets out a breath, attempting to control himself, and wondering whether Armin would have said he made the situation better or worse. However, a sound he's heard a thousand times comes up from near him.
"Eren..." Mikasa calls. Eren turns his head.
"I'm going to be placed in the rearguard. Where will your squad be deployed?"
He furrows his brows. "What? What does it matter to you?"
"When the fighting gets fierce, things will fall apart, I'll find you."
Eren frowns. "Seriously, you're going to abandon your comrades for me? I don't need protection, Mikasa. This isn't the time to worry about that!"
And he should know, he's spent all day doing the same thing.
"Don't start this. Things will become chaotic. I need to know where you are."
"Mikasa, you're the one who shouldn't be thinking about this. Humanity is the priority, not me!"
She frowns, making that damned face she always makes when it looks like she's in a whole different world, like she knows something he doesn't. "I'm not going to argue. If you won't tell me where you're stationed, I'll ask Armin."
"Why are you doing this? What's the point-"
"Trainee Ackerman..." the imposing voice of one of the elite Garrison members cuts through from behind them. "You're being specifically moved to the rearguard."
"Wait... she didn't know beforehand? Then how-"
"Yes, sir. I'll meet up with you at the front."
"We're being deployed in two minutes, make it quick," he says as he walks away.
Once they're alone again, Eren sighs, resisting the urge to punch the wall. "Mikasa... don't you freak out, too."
"I'm not freaking out."
"Humanity is in danger of being wiped out! What you want doesn't matter!" he shouts.
She's silent. Her head cast down, not in shame, but in deliberation. Eren figures he doesn't have time to deal with a cryptic Mikasa, moving to meet up with his squad, but a hand stops him.
"I won't let you die, Eren."
He feels the wind sweep into his hair, and he yanks his hand back. She lets him walk away.
"I'm not going to die. I can't die here."
He knows Mikasa will follow. She'll follow him anywhere.
Which is why he cannot die.
For she may follow him there, too.
It appears not even sleep could shake off Armin's headache. It hurts with a certain sickening feeling as he stares at the buildings ahead. The sun is bright in the sky, despite the numerous clouds, and once again he finds himself wondering what it is the birds see when they fly over the wall.
"Hey, Armin, isn't this a great chance?" his best friend's voice is heard.
He turns his head to see him looking at the clouds as well, a smile on his face. "If we're successful here, before even joining the Survey Corps, we'll definitely rise quickly through the ranks."
Armin feels a part of himself taken aback by Eren's confidence. Here Armin stands, his gear still just as heavy as the last time he wore it, himself feeling just as mortal as he always has, and Eren wears a smile, exuding and inspiring hope with every breath. He always seemed so immortal to the small boy, even when Eren was being beat up by bullies, his conviction never died.
With his best friend, Armin could conquer the world. For a moment, his headache disappears. "Yeah, you're right."
"Just to be clear," Mina interrupts the two, "a lot of people want to join the Survey Corps this time around."
"You got the best of me earlier, Eren, but not anymore," Thomas says with a smile.
"You think so, Thomas?" Eren responds.
"Let's see who can kill more titans."
"Then don't pad your numbers..."
"Team 34, advance! Support the vanguard!"
"This is it..." Armin thinks.
"Okay, let's go!"
They all let out a roar of triumph, a roar of perseverance and hope, a roar that says to the titans: it's time to fight back!
And despite himself, Armin is zipping across the buildings with the same speed as the rest of his comrades. It's strange, really. He can't shake the feeling that things are about to get challenging, yet he feels reassured. He will survive, in whatever form he may take. He may come out hardened by the struggle, by the death, but so will they all.
No one knows what the future holds.
No one.
There you have it! Not my longest one, to be sure, but let me know what you thought! How was the action? It was my first time writing something like that, so I'd be happy to know how I can improve, as it certainly won't be the last action scene. Also, if you're keeping track of the timeline, you'd know that things are about to get verry action packed, and you'll see the bulk of it next chapter. So please leave a review and have a nice day! -Y