Chapter 45: Nightmares

The warmth of his body presses against her. They kiss deeply as Rose sticks her hand up against the window in the heat of passion. Jack's coat on top of both of them. Both of their hearts are beating wildly. They want each other, forever and ever. Their moments of pure bliss make them want to shout to the world about their feelings of love and passion. They eventually lay against each other to rest for a moment.

"You're trembling," Rose whispers.

"It's okay, I'm alright," Jack breathes. He lays his head against her chest. "I can hear your heart beating."

Rose suddenly notices that the temperature in the Renault is dropping. She shivers hard, she can see their breaths now. She tries to get closer to Jack, but his body temperature was dropping. He was very cold.

A sudden noise interrupts their bliss. It's sounds like gunshots mixed with metal being ripped open. Rose sits up in the back seat and peers through the foggy window. To her horror, giant waves of water are rushing at them in their sanctuary.

The car is suddenly knocked to the side, spilling both of them against the window, shattering the glass in the process. Cold water sprays onto their naked bodies and both of them freeze up from the shock. The water begins to mix with their blood.

"Rose!" Jack hollers.

Rose tries to regain her balance, but she's in too much pain. She gasps when she sees Jack covered in cuts bleeding from his head and all over his body. He's so pale now that the blood is very noticeable. The water is filling the car quickly. They are both torn from trying to stop the bleeding or escape the flooding waters that are freezing both of them. Jack is trying to find a way out, climbing over the driver's seat to open the door before the car fills with water. Rose slips continuously, trying to help Jack, holding onto him, but he's so cold that it scares her.

There are distant rumbles and more cracking against the metal of the hull.

Rose screams as another wave washes over both of them, forcing them both under water. The both struggle, in a tangled mess, to find air. Rose shuts her eyes, her body completely numb from the cold and the red of their blood mixing together.

When she opens her eyes again, there are screams of all the desperate souls trying to survive in the icy cold water. They are above the surface, but the Titanic is not. She's floating on the door, with Jack clinging to her, promising to never let go. The sounds of the others around them echo in her head and any tears that Rose sheds are frozen to her face.

As the noises quiet down, both Rose and Jack cling to each other. Jack barely conscious. Rose remembers that this is about the time that the boat shows up to rescue them, but instead, there is no light, no voice calling out for anyone who is alive, just the lapping of the water and Rose's struggling breaths.

"Jack," Rose whispers. "Jack!"

Jack doesn't respond.

"Jack please," Rose begs.

Rose's heart begins to sink. The boat never came so Jack has now died. She tries to cry, but her body is burning from the pain of losing him. He's so cold now and pale, void of all life. She'd never see those blue eyes again or hear his laugh. She feels little hope and it is only a matter of time before she joins the dead floating around her…

All of sudden there's a jolt from below, perhaps the darkness has come to claim them. Rose feels Jack's hand slip through hers and Jack's face disappears beneath the icy water...into the darkness.

Rose sits up in bed. She's panting hard and sweating. She immediately turns to her side and her heart soars. Jack lays next to her, sleeping peacefully, warm and alive. Rose realizes that she's also been crying as she wipes tears from her eyes. The covers around them are rumpled beyond belief and despite everything, Jack remains unconscious.

She's so distressed that she has to get up. She can't sleep anymore. The images of Jack so pale and lifeless, along with the screams of all those who died that night still echo in her ears. She is haunted by everything that happened that night and she can't stand laying there any longer. She reaches for the crutch that Peter had used while recovering from his injury and she props herself up

Rose limps down the stairs to the kitchen, to her surprise a light is on and she smells something cooking. Rose comes around the corner to find Emma sitting at the table reading some papers. She also has a steaming mug of either coffee or tea or some kind of hot beverage.

"Can't sleep either huh?" Emma asks, hardly looking up from the papers.

"Not really," Rose says as she hobbles to a chair.

"Would you like some warm milk?" Emma asks. "My mom used to always make that for me when I couldn't sleep."

"If it's not too much trouble," Rose shrugs.

"It's never too much trouble Rose, especially with your ankle," Emma says.

Emma goes to the kettle and pours in some more milk before putting it on the stove.

"What part of the journey did you dream about?" Emma asks.

"What?" Rose says.

"What part of Titanic did you dream about?" Emma clarifies.

"Jack and I in the cargo hold where we uh…" Rose turns red, realizing that she never shared what happened to her and Jack after the wedding ceremony.

Emma smiles, "Made love?"

"How did you?" Rose gasps.

"It's not that hard to figure out due to the fact that you're about a month into your pregnancy and you and Jack only just reunited a week ago, so I assumed that something happened when we weren't around."

Rose flushes even redder. "It's not my proudest moment…"

"But it should be Rose, it's the most intimate time two people can have in their lives and it is often how a couple expresses their love for one another. Plus, you're carrying new life in a time of death, but what happened in the dream?" Emma asks, taking the kettle off as it begins to whistle.

"Well, we were… kissing and then the cargo hold and car suddenly got very cold that we could see our breaths. I was shivering and Jack was so cold. Water suddenly started pouring into the hold and we were trapped. I tried to hang onto Jack, but he was so cold and pale that he looked like a corpse. Then we were clinging to that door in the ocean. There was no boat and people were screaming and drowning next to us. And then Jack's hands slipped from mine and he sank into the dark depths of the ocean…"

Rose is shaking and tears are on the edges of her eyes now. Emma goes and grabs a blanket from the living room and puts it over Rose's shoulders and serves her the milk. She then sits down next to her.

"I wish I could tell you that it was just a dream and it didn't actually happen," Emma says in a soft voice. "But then I'd be lying"

"What do you mean?" Rose asks, taking a sip of the milk. The warmth of the beverage soothes Rose just a little bit, but not a lot.

"Well, the nights leading up to the disaster I was having bad dreams."

"What kind of dreams?" Rose asks.

"Sinking ship dreams," Emma replies, she too shudders. "It started the night before we boarded and I had this awful nightmare that I was swimming in the cold water, clinging to wreckage and watched a brightly lit ship slowly slip under the surface. When the power was cut on board, the ship broke in half and slowly slipped beneath the waves."

Rose shudders. Emma's dream eerily matched what actually happened to her and the Titanic. She and Jack were there, clinging to the stern as the ship broke in two before their very eyes.

"I thought it was just my brain stressing out by the fact that my parents were gone and I had a lot to deal with back at home, but when I got on board, they just kept getting worse."

Emma takes a sip of her drink to soothe her nerves.

"I had another dream that Peter, Sybil and I were out on the ship, under hundreds of stars. Peter told me I was beautiful and then all of a sudden a massive storm arose. All the lights on the ship went out and Peter vanished from my sight. I tried to find Sybil and I watched as she crawled to the edge of the ship and was swallowed up by the water. I could only hear her screams and then a massive wave showed me my reflection, but the face was demonic and it kept laughing. I went under the water and I couldn't break the surface. I watched the ship go down and break in two. I couldn't breathe and I was pulled down by the suction of the ship."

Rose puts her hand on her mouth, still very shocked by all this, it was as if Emma could see the future.

"Every single night I was on Titanic; I had dreams of the ship going down. I felt helpless. I knew that dreams often have meanings, but if I told anyone, they'd think I was crazy. Another dream I had almost come true when I was thrown deeper into the ship, while the passageway was filling with water, but unlike the nightmare, I managed to escape…"

Rose reaches over and pats Emma sympathetically.

"I knew something bad would happen. The dreams just kept getting worse. I couldn't explain it away any longer to stress or grief. I had that gut feeling that disaster would follow us and…I was right."

Emma takes a sip of her milk again. Rose does the same.

"I still have them now; tonight's was when I was under the lifeboat and the dark water eventually swallowed me up and drowned me."

Emma wipes some tears from her eyes. The fear she felt then is the same as the fear she feels now.

"I know that not everything in the nightmares came true, but they still haunt you. I actually feel…guilty. It's as if I could've done something to stop the disaster. If I had said something, not as many people would've died."

Rose shakes her head. "There's nothing you could've done Emma. None of us could've prevented what happened. It was… a series of mistakes…mistakes that had consequences…"

"To put it lightly," Emma groans. "At least we're all here, we survived and we're together."

The girls sit in silence for awhile, letting their milk get cold as they listen to the sounds of the night. Both are shaken from their nightmares and the disaster in general. They think about how lucky they are and that if one of any of their circumstances had been different, they would've likely perished and none of them would be here, in a warm home, safe and sound.

"I like to think that these dreams are our minds ways of working through the tragedy and guilt of surviving," Emma says softly. "We re-live the moments and wonder what might've been…"

Rose nods. "Just memories that we can never forget,"

"Right," Emma says. "And I think the only way to get passed these memories is to create new ones, happier ones. We do have a lot to look forward to." Emma reaches over and pats Rose's stomach. "You guys have a baby on the way, Sybil will be walking soon, Little Thomas will be turning four in a month or so, Peter and I getting married,"

"MARRIED" Rose gasps, she nearly drops her mug on the table.

"Peter and I have been talking about it and we think it'd be best if we got re-married. We never really signed a license and most of the witnesses are gone… so we'd like to have a sort of do-over, reaffirm our vows and be 'officially' married in the eyes of the law. This will be good for the company and Sybil will grow up in a secure family."

Rose's eyes go wide but then she smiles. "When are you going to do it?"

"We haven't planned that far ahead yet," Emma says. "What about you and Jack?"

Rose swallows. "W-well, we haven't really thought about…marriage. I mean we've only known each other for so long and Jack doesn't have a steady job or…"

"It's okay," Emma interrupts. "I was just asking because I see the way you two look at each other, that's real love, it reminds me of Peter and me, or my parents. It's the kind of love that is pure and should be celebrated."

Rose nods, tears in her eyes. She really did want to marry Jack…someday, but they could take their time. Her previous engagement to Cal was so fast and so superficial, she wanted to embrace every moment she had with Jack, make each one count. Of course, she didn't want their baby to be born out of wedlock either, but they still had a few months to decide.

"I'm sure it will happen…" Emma says. "When you're both ready."

Rose smiles again and then yawns. Emma does the same.

"I think it's time to hit the hay," Emma says. "I want to get as much sleep as possibly before Sybil wakes me up for food and plus I've got a meeting tomorrow at the office."

"It never ceases to amaze me that you own and run a company," Rose shakes her head in disbelief. "You're a role model to women everywhere."

"It certainly wasn't by choice," Emma says. "But I'm glad I'm respecting my father's wishes."

Rose smiles and both girls put their mugs in the sink before heading back upstairs. They hug once before going into their separate rooms.

"Good night Rose," Emma whispers.

"Good night Emma," Rose replies.

"Have pleasant dreams."

Rose limps back to the bed and curls up next to Jack, wrapping her arms around his sleeping form. She shuts her eyes and thinks about what it would be like to marry Jack. Be Mrs. Dawson and raise a family with him.

She falls into a happy sleep.