Chapter 56: Try Again

Rose comes down to the kitchen for breakfast with a letter in her hand.

"What do you have there?" Peter asks, putting Sybil into her highchair.

"A letter for my mother," Rose says quietly, keeping her eyes down at the piece of paper.

Jack stands up immediately and puts his arms around Rose. He kisses her neck.

"Really?" Emma says, stirring the eggs in the skillet.

Rose nods. "I decided both of you were right. I thought long and hard about everything and decided to write to her to tell her I'm okay. My mother never did anything life threatening to us and the worst thing she did was forbid Jack and me to be together. It's not like she can't do anything to us now." Rose looks down at the diamond ring on her finger that clasps her growing baby bump. "And if what the private investigator told us is true and she really does miss me, I think it's best that I at least let her know I'm okay."

Emma smiles warmly and serves the table scrambled eggs. She's happy that Rose is taking action, burying at least part of the hatchet. Emma was never going to have a mother again, neither was Jack, so they were going to have to make the best with those they had left. No family was ever going to be perfect and it was clear to all of them, minus the baby, that Ruth DeWitt Bukater had good, but misguided intentions for her daughter.

"I don't doubt that she'll put up a fight, trying to convince me to come home and marry Cal, but she doesn't have power over me anymore," Rose says as she grabs Jack's hand tightly. "Over us."

"I've been thinking about that actually," Emma says, pouring some warm milk for her sister. "And I think the best way to ensure she doesn't have power over you is to get married really soon."

Jack chokes on his eggs, Rose drops her fork onto her plate and Peter practically sprays his juice across the table.

"What?" Rose gasps.

"Well, you two are engaged now, but it's technically not legally binding yet. Someone could still do something to prevent you two from being together, so my idea is that we do a double wedding soon, for Peter and I to be 'officially' married and for you guys to finally start your lives together and prevent your mother or anyone else from keeping you apart."

Rose looks over at Jack and then down at her engagement ring. She and Jack had just gotten engaged and were simply enjoying the fact that they were together again. It had only been two months since the disaster and more than a month since she and Jack had been reunited, Rose just wanted to spend some time with her beloved artist and celebrate the things that life had to offer them. She wasn't even thinking about marriage yet, despite just recently being engaged, she just wanted to take it one day at a time. At the same time, Emma did have a point. If she and Jack got married soon, then there was nothing that either her mother or Cal could do to keep them apart. Plus, their unborn child wouldn't be considered a bastard, despite being conceived out of wedlock, and their lives could truly start, they could buy a house and move to wherever they wanted, maybe to Chippewa Falls, Jack's hometown or even Europe. It's something that Rose had always dreamed of; being Mrs. Rose Dawson, raising their child and living a comfortable life, maybe being able to get a career as an actress someday and the first step to that was to be pronounced man and wife.

"I'm not saying it has to be tomorrow at the courthouse, maybe a nice fall wedding or something quaint like that. Nothing too extravagant, but a small ceremony where you can celebrate your love for one another and finally be together forever and always."

Rose smiles when she hears the family vow said out loud. It was exactly the way she and Jack felt about each other, likewise for Emma and Peter. The couples' love was strong and it kept them together, overcoming obstacles and reassuring one another that they could do anything, that their love would survive no matter what. It felt right to be united in God's eyes and affirm their love for one another as a couple

Jack bites his lip hard. It seemed a little rushed to even be suggesting marriage so soon after they got engaged, but he loved Rose and he would do whatever it took to make her happy. He did like Emma's reasoning; it was a foolproof way to ensure that he and Rose could not be broken up again, he would take it in a heartbeat

"I'll let you guys think about it, but if you want that letter delivered Rose, I still have the private investigator's business card. He can tell your mother to come alone and I'll have the courts serve Cal with the restraining orders on Monday," Emma adds.

Rose manages a small smile, feeling relief that Cal wouldn't come near any of them ever again, the man was dangerous and he needed to be stopped from pursuing her any further.

"Okay," Rose says, handing over the blank envelope. She left no return address and it simply had Ruth DeWitt Bukater on the front of it.

"You sure you want to do this?" Jack asks gently.

Rose swallows and nods.

"It's time to move on with my life, with or without my mother."

…

The private investigator was examining a new case file for a missing steel worker in New Jersey when his phone rings. He blows out a ring of smoke before picking up the ear piece.

"Hello?" he says.

"Hello, this is Emma Carson from the law firm."

"Oh yes, the young lawyer who beat me at my own game, how can I forget, how may I help you?"

"I've been talking to Rose DeWitt Bukater and she's taken some time and thought over getting into contact with her mother, Ruth DeWitt Bukater. I have a letter with me from Rose to Ruth that she would like you to deliver to her mother and her mother only. Rose wants to put her mother's mind at ease so that she can move on with her life and call off the search. In that letter, there is also an ultimatum for Mrs. Bukater, if she is willing to separate from Mr. Hockley, then she is certainly welcome back into her daughter's life. We were hoping that you might be our messenger for the time being, just until Rose can establish a form of communication with her mother that will not be given to Caledon. That would be the full extent of your services."

The private investigator takes a long drag of his cigar as he considered the offer. He would like to have Mr. Hockley and Mrs. DeWitt Bukater off his caseload, there weren't the worst clients that he'd ever had, but they were pretty difficult to handle. He had been a messenger before, mostly between a widow and her husband's sons when it came to negotiating the last will and testament of the deceased. Normally, the messenger job fell to lawyers, however, Mr. Hockley and Mrs. Bukater said they didn't want the publicity for the case and he definitely did not want to hand the case over to Ms. Carson's law firm or any other for that matter.

"I think that would be appropriate," he says.

"Thank you, sir, I'll have Jack Dawson deliver the letter soon because as I understand you work in the same police station."

"That would seem to be the case," the PI grins. "Goodbye Ms. Carson, I hope not to hear from you again…"

"Thank you and good luck," Emma says.

"Indeed," the private investigator says before hanging up the phone.

…

"Sally," Ruth says from the living room of Cal's two storey New York apartment. "Could you please bring me a glass of water?"

"Of course ma' me," the lady's maid says.

The maid vanishes into the rather large kitchen and thinks about her mistress' current predicament. The many calls to the police station had turned up very little in the past few weeks of Ruth's daughter and Sally knew that things were not getting any better. She's very worried about the woman she works for. Mrs. Bukater hardly left the large apartment, except to sit on the balcony in the sunshine to cry or to take the time to herself. Mr. Hockley was hardly any help at all since he put in long hours at his steel company, leaving the poor, aging woman to her own devices. Sally hated to see her mistress in such distress, Sally, of course, was not a mother herself, but she couldn't imagine losing a child, never to be seen again. Ruth ate very little and would only drink water, it was also a challenge for the woman to sleep. Often times Sally would hear Mrs. DeWitt Bukater calling out for her daughter in the night. It saddened the lady's maid a lot, she just wished that the police would do something to end this poor woman's suffering.

Ruth sat by the open window to cool down from the unbearably hot day, she fans herself with a few sheets of paper and continues to stare out at the busy streets of New York below her. The woman never had the energy to do anything else. Once Rose was reported missing, Ruth's entire world collapsed around her. Many worries ran through her head, including that if Rose could not be found, this would be the end of their first-class life and their good family name would be dragged through the mud. She kept insisting to anyone who would listen that her daughter had been kidnapped and couldn't imagine what kind of torture her own flesh and blood was enduring. Perhaps she had been hit by a car, perhaps she was dead in a ditch somewhere, perhaps she was a prostitute on the streets, sold there by her captor. All these horrible scenarios ran through the poor woman's head which caused her to lay awake at night, crying and calling for her only child. She did consider the possibility that Rose had run off, but it seemed so unlikely, Rose's behavior had improved so much in the month leading up to her disappearance that Ruth had hoped that her daughter had finally seen the light and was willing to do what was best for her family. Guilt was her most prominent emotions. If only she hadn't been so hard on Rose, insisting that she watch what she ate and she'd stop complaining about Hockley. Her daughter had been behaving so well that Ruth felt she shouldn't have pushed her daughter so hard. The first-class woman blamed herself immensely.

When the maid brings the water, Ruth sips it quietly and stares out at the city landscape, wondering where her daughter was.

The telephone in the apartment rang shrilly, echoing into the room.

"Please answer that Sally, it's probably one of Mr. Hockley's business associates."

Ruth had long given up on the police force and the private investigator that they had hired to find Rose. Clearly, none of them cared enough to even attempt to find her only child and it angered her immensely.

"Yes ma 'me," the maid says and picks up the telephone.

"Hello?"

Ruth sighs and turns her attention back to the window.

"Oh, Mrs. Bukater?" Sally calls after hearing the good news, hardly able to contain her excitement. "It's the investigator man, he has some good news."

Ruth's heart soars with excitement and hope as she stands up with more energy than she's had in a quite some time. She rushes over to the phone and fumbles in excitement to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"Hello Mrs. Bukater, I have good news about your daughter's disappearance."

"You have found her, oh thank the lord!" Ruth is now crying in joy.

"Yes I have and I have a message from her."

"You do?! That's wonderful! Is she with you, please put her on the phone!"

"She's not with me Mrs. Bukater, she is in New York at this moment and…" the PI pauses. "I think it would be best that you come to my office so I can explain and please come alone, per her request and do NOT tell Mr. Hockley about this."

Ruth is puzzled by this request, surely her daughter would want to see Caledon wouldn't she? Why wasn't she at the office? Perhaps Rose was being brought to the station as they were speaking. Ruth could hardly contain her joy; her daughter had been found at last!

"I will be right there," the woman says before hanging up the phone.

Ruth then immediately rushes to find her hat.

"Quickly Sally, I must meet the investigator at his office, I assume that Rose is being brought there as we speak!" Tears are running down the mother's face. She has the maid fix her hair and hat before grabbing her pocketbook and leaving the apartment.

…

Ruth rushes into the police station, past the many officers and convicted criminals surrounding her on her way to the third floor. She didn't even seem to notice anyone as she rushed down the hall. She didn't even bother to knock before bursting into the investigator's room.

"Where is she?" Ruth cries out. She looks around the room frantically in search of her daughter's red hair. Her heart sinks when she doesn't see Rose. She can feel tears welling up in her eyes.

"Hello Mrs. Bukater, please take a seat so I can explain everything." The man sits behind his desk, smoke billowing around his face as per usual, pouring himself a glass of whiskey

Ruth grabs a handkerchief and slowly sits down in the same chair that she'd sat in before when begging for the man's help. Ruth's mind is buzzing with questions and they all want to come out in a jumble of accusations and confused cries, but a small part of herself tells her to stay quiet and listen to what the man had to say.

"As you know, from the beginning I assumed that your daughter may have run away from home, but why that was was still a bit unclear to you. I learned from your interviews that Rose had not been happy with her life at all and had attempted to run away on multiple occasions onboard the Titanic, correct?"

Ruth nods slowly, tears pouring from her eyes in grief and confusion.

"Well as I did some digging I discovered that your daughter had made some friends on the ship, friends whom she idolized and wanted to be like. She had also fallen for a boy yes?"

"Yes, a third class boy named…Jason…or…Joel…or…"

"Jack Dawson," the investigator corrects.

"Yes, but he didn't survive the sinking. Mr. Hockley checked the list of survivors and had seen a man buried at sea."

"I know he did, he told me so himself, but looks can be deceiving I'm afraid Mrs. Bukater. I did some research on her friends and found out that they had survived the sinking. I had to cover all possible leads Mrs. Bukater and so I went to question your daughter's friends and I found through a sheer series of unusual coincidences, Mr. Dawson, the friends and your daughter reunited."

Ruth sniffles a bit. She wants to ask so many questions at once, but all she can muster is a single strangled sob.

"And?" Ruth says quietly.

"And your daughter asked me to give you this, it should explain the rest."

The investigator hands over the envelope with Ruth's name on it.

"I will allow you some time alone to read it, I have to meet with the police chief privately. If you will excuse me."

The investigator then gets up and leaves the room with a fresh cigar in hand.

Ruth stares down at the envelope in her shaking hands. She wants more than anything to rip it open, but something is stopping her. Perhaps it is the fear of what she will find inside. A message from her daughter that she no longer loves her mother and has moved halfway across the world to escape. It became clear to Ruth that her daughter had run away and evidently did not want to be found. It broke Ruth's heart into a million pieces and yet, Rose did care enough to at least write to her mother, end her suffering of wonder and worry.

With shaky hands, Ruth opens the envelope. She recognized her daughter's handwriting.

Dear Mother,

I've decided to write to you because I've heard that you are worried sick about me and staying in New York with my former fiancé. I cannot admit that I feel guilty about your current situation, but after much persuading, I've decided to write you this letter to let you know that I am okay. What happens next will be entirely up to you.

I would like to let you know that I am never coming home to Philadelphia. I hated that life and I never want to go back to it. I hated it so much that I attempted to end my life the night I met Mr. Dawson and invited him to the first class dinner. I feel that you should know the truth about how much my life had been ruined by your pressures and society. I also want you to know that I am never going to marry that bastard Cal Hockley and here is why.

The man does not treat me like a human being, but merely a possession and I certainly deserve far more than that. That man also has a short fuse and is abusive. I'll have you know that the bruise that appeared on my face the night of the sinking was put there by that awful man you wanted me to marry. I also want to let you know that the night the ship was going down, Hockley and his manservant abducted my friend's innocent sister in an attempt to lure us out of hiding. Once we fell for the trap, he threatened me with a knife and then shot my friend's new husband out of anger. He then proceeded to frame Mr. Dawson for the crime and stealing the Heart of the Ocean, which in turn, had him locked below decks while the ship was sinking. That is where I went when I left you at the lifeboats. I felt no remorse for leaving you there to ponder what you had done to drive your daughter away to rescue the man she truly loved. I did manage to save Mr. Dawson, but I could not part with him on the ship. Caledon discovered this and shot at us while chasing us into the sinking ship. I feel that you must know the truth so you realize how truly evil the man you are staying with is and I would fear for my life if I were you.

I wanted to let you know that I knew you were the one who told Mr. Hockley that I would be in New York for the dinner, but I actually want to thank you. If Mr. Hockley had not accompanied me, then I wouldn't have run from the dinner and been reunited with the love of my life. I also managed to find my friends again, my true friends, whom love and care about me much more than you ever did. All of us escaped that night and I've been staying with them ever since. I'm not going to tell you their names or where I'm staying in case that you insist on telling Caledon about my whereabouts. I hate the man and I fear for mine and my real fiancé's life.

I am going to marry Jack Dawson and there is absolutely nothing on this earth that will make you change my mind. We are going to live a happy and quiet life together, go wherever the wind takes us and raise our child. I am also carrying his child. You may call me a whore, a slut or whatever you'd like, but I simply do not care any longer. Your opinion does not matter to me. I am in charge of my own destiny.

Lastly, I've written this letter with an ultimatum for you and only you. Jack and I have discussed in detail about allowing you into our lives. I, of course, have refused outright, but my friends and fiancé have convinced me to consider allowing you into our lives again. They reason that you will be the only grandparent to our unborn child as Jack has lost both his parents in a fire, something you would have known if you had taken the time to get to know him properly.

If you choose to get in contact with me again, here are the conditions; you are to leave Caledon and never tell him that you know where I am. My friends, who are lawyers, have filed restraining orders against him to protect themselves, their young child, Jack, myself and our unborn child. If you tell Mr. Hockley anything, this will be the last time you will ever hear from me. You must end the engagement and even if that means you must sell our possessions and become a seamstress, so be it, but I will never have contact with him again. You have probably figured out that I could care less about the money and rather live among people who love me. Another condition is, you must treat Jack Dawson and my friends with the utmost respect, no matter what you may think of them. They have given me the love and respect I deserve, something you never gave me at all. A third condition is that you must call off this search for me, I am safe far away from the life I've lived. You must also not interfere with my life at all, you cannot tell me how to live my life or how to raise my child, you've had so much control over me for so long, I am taking it back.

If you can agree to these conditions, you can talk to the private investigator and we can arrange to meet at a separate location. If all goes well, I may begin to trust you again and you may be allowed into my life again.

If this is our last communication, then thank you for being my mother, despite how poor at that job you may have been, and wish you the best in all your future endeavors. If not, I hope that we may connect and meet to talk about the future and perhaps try again.

Sincerely,

Rose Dawson