We haven't had Bernadetta in a while haven't we? How could I neglect one of the best girls ever? And also who started this whole thing.
This is gonna be another heavy depressed chapter like Chapter 30. So fair warning. These are just so interesting to write.
Enjoy
The Monastery...Was quiet...Empty.
Only what remained of the Black Eagle class and the rest of the Golden Deer class were present at the Monastery. Having come together for the same reason.
It was the date they promised to see each other again. The promise they made five years ago.
Only...The Professor wasn't here...
She didn't want to think about his death. She had hoped deep down that he had survived that fall. And was now simply waiting at the Monastery for them. Or trying to find them...Or...Something...
It was just so unfair.
Why did this happen to her? What had she done to deserve this? She did exactly what she was told to do, stay in her room, be a nice submissive girl. Or maybe it was because she went out of her room. Maybe this was her punishment for thinking something was going to be different this time. This was her punishment for trying to get close to someone. She should have learned her lesson from before.
She had wandered off from everyone. Wanting to get away from everyone. The smiles, she could tell they were fake. Forced. Why were they pretending that nothing had happened. Their Professor was dead.
She suddenly found herself in front of the Professor's dorm. She wasn't quite sure why she was here. But she couldn't bring herself to move away, her body resisted her will and before she knew it she was opening the door and stepping into the room. Shutting the door behind her. But this was a grave mistake.
She fell to her knees, tears welling in her eyes.
"Why...Why did you take him from me..." She sniffed, trying to wipe the tears from her eyes but the tears didn't stop. The more she wiped the worse it became until eventually she couldn't handle it anymore and she bawled like a child.
"Why!? He was all I had!" She leaned her head against the Professor bed, his smell still lingering. She found some comfort in it, even if it was small. She climbed onto his bed and wrapped herself in its blankets. Like this, it was like the Professor was hugging her. It was like he never left.
In here, in his room. She was practically surrounded by him. She made up her mind. To hell with everything. The War. Edelgard. The Church. Even her...Friends...
All that mattered was right now. Being inside the Professor's room was all she ever needed right now. It was all she ever wanted. She would spend the rest of her days here. For she was afraid that if she left, the Professor's smell would disappear. And she would be alone again. She moved off the bed, the blankets wrapped around her and she locked the door. No one would have the key. Only Seteh had the master key. And he was long gone. She sat in the middle of the room, wrapped in the Professor's blankets.
"What shall we talk about today, Professor?" She muttered. Awaiting a response. But nothing came.
And nothing would.
It had been three days since Bernadetta locked herself in the Professor's room. Dorothea noticed her walking away from the group and curiously followed her. Seeing her entering the Professor's room. She tried the door but found it locked. Figuring Bernadetta just needed some alone time she left it.
But no one had seen her since then.
The Black Eagles and Golden Deer class tried to talk to her through the door. But never got a response.
And she still had to be there, Dorothea would always leave food in front of the door for her and a few hours later when she would come buy to check the plate would be empty, or half-empty.
"I think I'm going to go looking for the Professor again today." Claude spoke up. Pulling Dorothea from her thoughts.
Lysithea, Lorenz, Dorothea, Ferdinand and Claude were all sitting in the cafeteria. A few of them knew how to cook and did their best to make everyone breakfeast.
"You think you'll find anything?" Lysithea asked. Claude didnt't say anything. Finishing his breakfeast.
"What makes you think the Professor's alive anyway?" Lorenz added. Dorothea jumped to her feet, slamming the table.
"What makes you think he's dead?!" Lorenz had some nerve. Ferdinand put a hand on Dorothea's back.
"Calm down, Dorothea...I'm sure he didn't mean anything bad." She looked at Ferdinand before glaring back at Lorenz. Sitting back down at the table.
"He has a point though...I'm not sure what I'm expecting to find...But I just want something." Claude looked at everyone at the table. "I have to know what happened to the Professor."
"Just try not to draw too much attention to yourself. I don't think Edelgard will be so merciful if she were to invade the Monastery again..." Lorenz sighed.
"How has Bernadetta been?" Lysithea asked, turning to Dorothea. Who's heart sunk upon hearing her name. She wasn't sure herself.
"I don't know...I'm going to bring her breakfeast right now. Did you wanna come?"
Lysithea shook her head quickly. "N-No...Thank you for the offer though..." The white-haired mage returned to poking at her food. Seems even she was scared of learning the truth of whatever happened to Bernadetta.
Dorothea nodded and and stood up, grabbing the spare plate and walking outside of the Cafeteria. Saying goodbye to everyone. She walked across the barren courtyard, some of the doors to the dorms half-open, broken or closed. She wondered how many items her classmates had to leave behind due to the invasion. She was afraid to open any of the doors other then her own. She felt as it were like disturbing a grave.
She reached the door to what was once the Professor's room. Raising her hand and knocking on the door. Receiving no response as usual.
"Bernie~ I brought you breakfeast...Please be sure to eat..." She tried to say in a cheery tone. But she couldn't even convince herself.
She heard nothing from behind the door. Sighing and setting the plate down next to it.
"I'll leave the plate here. I'll see ya at lunch then..." She turned around and walked down the steps. Half expecting the door to fly open and Bernadetta to rush out hugging her.
But no such thing happened.
Five weeks had passed since they all met up. And things had taken a turn for the worse. As Dorothea was afraid it would.
It started off subtle, she came by one day to notice that Bernadetta had not touched her breakfeast. Taking the still full plate and setting lunch down in its place. When she returned later Bernadetta did not eat her lunch, and same with her dinner.
This wasn't unusual, sometimes Bernadetta refused to eat at all some days. But this repeated several days in a row. And Dorothea began to worry.
She tasked Ferdinand and Claude with finding the master key Seteh had to the dorms so she could get inside. She was fine giving Bernadetta her privacy, but now she was endangering her own health. And Dorothea wasn't going to let another one of her friends die.
Not when she can prevent it.
"Claude, have you found it yet?" Dorothea would ask. But Claude would only shake his head.
"I'm sorry, Dorothea. But my priorities are elsewhere. I have to focus on keeping everyone safe."
"But what about Berine!?"
"I don't have time to worry about her, I'm sorry. We have to focus on things right now."
Claude didn't understand how dangerous Bernadetta's situation was. And he didn't want to find out afraid he'll lose all hope, just like her.
A few days later and Bernadetta stopped drinking water. She remembered the Professor teaching them that one could only last four days without water. She was running out of time.
Finally, Ferdinand found the key and he and Dorothea rushed to the Professor's dorm room.
"Hurry unlock it!" Dorothea pleaded, Ferdinand fumbled with the key, before finally sliding it in place and unlocking it. He threw open the door, and they both were met with a horrid sight.
The curtains had been shut tight. The only light being the light tunneling through the doorway, dust particles floated in the air. Clothes were strewn around the room, presumably the Professor's.
Curled into a fetal position in the middle of the room, clutching a bundle of clothes to her, was Bernadetta. Her eyes we're dull and lifeless. Her figure now a sickly thin. The only indication that she was even alive was her struggled, raspy breathing.
Her clothes hung loosely from her malnourished body. Her once smooth hair was now back to it originally messy hairstyle. Except this time it was messier. Her petrifying gaze slowly moved to look at them, and her eyes widened in horror.
"You...What are you doing here..." Bernadetta muttered.
"B-Bernie...We're here to help..." Dorothea approached her purple-haired friend. But Bernadetta scrambled to her feet, pulling a dagger out and pointing it at Dorothea.
"Get out..."
Dorothea blinked. "W-Wha..."
"Get out! Get out now!"
Dorothea's eyes began to burn as she tried to hold back tears. "B-Bernie its me...It's Dorothea..."
"I don't care! Leave me alone!" Bernadetta's thin arm holding the dagger was shaking, scared.
Ferdinand entered the room, holding his hands up and cautiously approaching Bernadetta. Her eyes glanced at him and she pointed the dagger at him.
"It's okay Bernadetta. We're not here to hurt you. We're going to help you." Ferdinand slowly drew closer, and Dorothea took another step, only for Bernadetta to notice. She glanced between the two, then held the dagger to her wrist.
"Stay back!" She barked. Dorothea's eyes widened at the threat.
"B-Bernie please don't..."
"Then leave me alone! Get out! I don't care about anything! Just let me die!" Tears we're streaming down Bernadetta's face now. The tip of the dagger was already digging into her skin and blood dripped from her wrist and onto the wooden floor.
Ferdinand turned to leave, grabbing Dorothea's shoulder.
"Dorothea...We should leave..." The brunette turned to her noble friend.
"B-but..."
"Dorothea..."
The songtress gave one last look at her reclusive friend. Who glared back at them with a crazed look in her eyes.
Dorothea could only back out of the room, she was afraid she'd hurt her friend. But she was powerless to do anything.
What would the Professor do, she wondered. If only he were here. He could surely save Bernadetta from this dark pit of despair.
Dorothea fell to her knees as her and Ferdinand walked out of the Professor's room. Bernadetta swiftly shutting the door behind them.
Tears begin to stream down her cheeks as she hugged herself. "PLease Professor...Come back to us..."
Weeks had passed since they entered Bernadetta's room. Dorothea kept bringing her food. And Bernadetta eventually started drinking water again. But she barely ate anything. She didn't dare open the door again. She was afraid of what she'd find.
The others had completely given up. Refusing to waste anytime trying help her. But she understood. There was a war going on after all and they had make sure the Empire didn't notice them. There was no way they could survive another direct attack.
She was used to the bell waking her up. But the bell no longer run, yet her body still woke up right when the bell did. She pulled herself out of bed, getting dressed for the day.
She wasn't sure how much longer she could stand this. Some of the others were talking about returning home, and she was thinking about herself. Even if it meant having to fight for Edelgard. It had to be better then this...
She opened her door, it was raining heavily, heavy ran drops pattering against the roof.
The heavy and frequent rain drops obscured her vision. But she could swear she saw a figure standing on the dock at the fishing pond.
She was curious as to who was dumb enough to be standing out in the middle of the rain. She stepped into the endless downpour. Not caring if she got wet, it was the least of her problems. She approached the figure, who turned upon sensing her presence. And her eyes widened.
The Professor was standing there, staring back at her with that same clueless look on his face. He offered her a slight smile. And that was all it took for Dorothea to break down crying. She ran into his opened arms. Not sure what was her tears and what was the rain. She clutched him tightly, burying her face into his chest.
She suddenly pushed away from him and looked up at him.
"Bernadetta! S-She's..." She was silenced when the Professor patted her head.
"Its fine...I understand. Claude told me..."
"C-Claude?" The Professor nodded. Dorothea would have to talk to the cunning man later. She released the Professor from her embrace, letting him walk towards his room, Dorothea swiftly following close behind him.
She handed him the master key Ferdinand got and he unlocked it. Opening the door, letting what little light was in the sky to shine in. Revealing the deteriorated form of Bernadetta. She had grown even skinnier since Dorothea last saw her. Her hair more akin to a birds next with knots in it. Bernadetta was sitting in the middle of the room, wearing one of the Professor's cloaks and holding her knees close to her chest with her back towards the door.
When she heard it open she slowly turned her head around to look at them, her eyes still dark and dull.
Her eyes widened upon seeing the two, her gaze locked onto the Professor. She shakily got to her feet, the Professor's spare cloak hanging loosely from her thin body. The Professor stepped forward, not caring that he was dripping wet from the rain.
Bernadetta pulled out a dagger again.
"You...Y-You aren't real..."
The Professor, frowned, but he kept taking slow steps towards her, and Bernadetta kept backing up until she hit the wall.
"P-Please...Leave me alone...Stop taunting me!" She cried out, tears streaming down her face.
The Professor remained silent, inching his way closer to her. She held the dagger to her wrist again. Dorothea choked back, tears, she could barely watch.
The Professor's eyes narrowed and he took a quick step towards her, grabbing her wrist and holding them above her head. Causing her to drop the dagger. She struggled in his grip.
"No! Get off me! You're dead! You aren't real!" Her crying became more frantic, shutting her eyes tight and shaking her head side to side.
The Professor released her wrist and hugged her tight to his body. She struggled at first, trying to push him off her, but her flailing slowed down to an eventual stop.
"P-Professor?"
The Professor smiled. "I'm here Bernadetta."
"Y-You're not a ghost?"
The Professor shook his head.
"You're real...You're alive. Professor!" She begin to bawl like a child, hugging the Professor tight, and Dorothea couldn't hold back her tears anymore. Her knees giving out and she let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. She sobbed quietly. The Professor turning towards her and opening an arm, inviting her into the embrace. She smiled and took it. The Professor hugging both of them tightly.
Bernadetta's recovery was not easy. Some of the food she tried to eat she would simply vomit back up, having to small bits a few days at a time to ease her body back into eating.
She stuck close to the Professor. Literally. Always holding his hand or clinging to his arm. She refused to give him any space. Not that The Professor minded.
The only time she did agree to leave his side was when it was time to go to bed.
But even then she would frequently find herself wandering to his room late at night.
A knock on the door made him look up from his book. He set it down on his end table got out of the bed. Setting his glasses down next to the book.
He opened the door, not surprised to see Bernadetta clutching her pillow. Looking up at him.
It had been a few weeks since he returned and she was already looking remarkably better. Some of her weight had returned and her hair, while still a slight mess, was not as bad as it was before.
"P-Professor..."
"You want to sleep with me, I'm guessing."
Bernadetta nodded quickly. Then blushed. Byleth smiled. Stepping aside and letting her in. Shutting the door behind her. She climbed into his bed, setting her pillow down next to his. Byleth climbed into bed with her. Pulling the covers over both of them. She avoided looking at him. Before her gaze finally met his. Surprised to see he was already sleep. She scooted closer to him. Wrapping an arm around him and hugging him tight, resting her head on his chest and smiling.
"Welcome back, Professor..."
Sorry for the late upload. I've been playing Persona 5 Royal plus work has been having me work early and late so I haven't had a lot of down time. Technically.
This kinda followed the same format as the Constance one which I hope doesn't bother any of you. I find it fun trying to figure out how these girls would react to a sudden and severe bout of Depression. Constance's was kinda a shot in the dark but I spent time thinking about Bernadetta and this was the result. Shutting her self in and not caring if she starved seemed to match her mental state. I wonder what I should do for the others because I plan on making more these for the other girls.
However, we are slowly but surely approaching chapter 50, I planned to have this go to chapter 100 but seeing as how things have died down and I'm slowly burning out I find chapter 50 to be a more reachable goal.
I don't want this fanfic to end trust me, but I don't wanna keep going on hiatus's for an unknown period of time, not knowing if I'll ever come back and I don't want to keep the few of you who are still reading this waiting so.
I'll put a poll on my profile page. Please vote on it and let me know what I should do.
Until next time.