I own nothing, not Naruto and not the Total Drama Series
**Camera Static**
"There was once a man with a dream." A monotone voice speaks, the camera panning towards him quickly, revealing a strangely dressed man. He wore a weighted and pocket covered olive green vest over a long sleeved black shirt and long black pants, tied to his ankles over a pair of durable open toed shoes with strips of bandages. His face, what little could be seen behind the face mask covering the entire lower half of his face and plain black headband tilted down to cover his left eye, was focused intently downwards at the little orange book in his hand rather than at the camera, his gravity defying grey hair throwing even more shadow over his dark visible eye that was trailing across the pages in front of him.
"He wanted to make a reality show on an island where he tortured a bunch of teenagers legally." The man continued, once again not looking up from his book and his voice not straying from an even deadpan.
"Until an intern suggested that instead of just regular teens, they track down a bunch of ninja kids and throw them together instead, promoting more violence and drama than before, for amusement of course. And so the network tossed that other Mc-something guy to the curb and began the search."
Finally looking up from his book, the grey haired man cheekily gave a curved smile with his one visible eye. "My name is Kakashi Hatake and I'm the host of the newest and most ninja reality show ever, welcome, to TOTAL NINJA ISLAND!"
**Camera Static**
"Here on this island, we've invited the 24 most advanced and studied ninja teens from across the country, and promised a chance to test their skills. Of course, we forgot to mention that it involves staying at an old run down summer camp and the 'challenges' they'll be put through may or may not have been directly ripped and slightly changed from what that first guy pitched."
Kakashi giggled as he waited in front of an old dock, the faint sound of a boat engine slowly coming into focus.
"And here comes our first competitor, let's see what we've got."
Stepping off the boat was a brown haired girl wearing a white qipao top with dark red accents that matched her the baggy dark red harem style pants she wore. Slung tightly across her lower back was a sling style bag that was shaped similarly to an oversized scroll. Her hair was styled in short bangs that rested just above her brown eyes, but was mostly pulled up in a pair of buns that bore a striking resemblance to panda ears. Aside from her scroll shaped bag, she had a large duffel sticking out at several unnatural angles easily carried in one hand.
"Welcome Tenten, to Total Ninja Island!" Kakashi greeted with fake cheer and an eye smile.
"TV lied?" Tenten said dryly, looking at Kakashi and then at the rest of the camp behind him, old rundown cabins and no sign of modern comforts staring back at her.
"Of course, now if you could just wait in line for the rest of the campers to arrive, I'm sure many will have more humorous reactions than yours." Tenten just rolled her eyes and trudged to where Kakashi gestured, fingering her scroll bag with one hand as she did so.
The next boat came in and dropped off its passenger, a blue haired boy with goggle style glasses in a vertically striped blue-grey turtleneck and desert camo cargo pants held down at the ankle similar to Kakashi's own. He also wore a pair of tight over ear headphones and when he opened his mouth to greet Kakashi, revealed sharp shark-like teeth.
"H-hello. Nice to be here." He greeted, shifting slightly with his suitcase that had a large handle sticking out of the top.
"Chojuro, good to have you, but if you could clear the way, we've got 22 more little ninjas on the way and no time to lose."
Chojuro nodded and moved next to Tenten, who was eyeing the handle in his bag appraisingly.
"Next up, because there are shockingly few ninja people still around in the 21st century , we found some siblings, welcome Temari, Kankuro, and Gaara!"
The new three stepping off the boat were dressed far more oddly than the two before them. The most normal of the three was Temari, the lone girl of the three. Her sandy blonde hair was pulled back in four tuft ponytails and she wore black ninja dress, slit for maneuverability and tied around her center with a red sash, a large fan strapped across her back.
Gaara, the youngest of the three, had blood red hair and a red kanji tattoo on his brow. His clothing was a simple red overcoat, buttoned to cover his torso over tan cargo pants. His only luggage was the large terracotta gourd he carried on his back, unlike the other two that both had duffel bags. He had deep bags under his sea green eyes, dark enough to resemble a raccoon's mask.
Kankuro was wearing a black cat onesie and purple makeup on his face.
"Welcome welcome, quick question before the next group though, Kankuro, you weren't just wearing that ridiculous thing for the audition video?" Kakashi asked while snickering.
"It's a traditional assassin garb with warpaint!" Kankuro loudly protested while Temari rolled her eyes at her brother.
"Yes, that's exactly why I've caught you stealing my purple eyeliner before, for war." Kankuro gave a squawk of protest but was cut off by Gaara.
"You choose what you wear, deal with it." His voice was dry like sandpaper and bore only a hint of teasing.
"Your brother's right, you know." Tenten added her two cents. "If you wanna go out in your pajamas, that's entirely up to you."
Kankuro grumbled but was cut off from saying anything as Temari grabbed his ear and yanked him towards Tenten and a chuckling Chojuro, Gaara silently following them.
"And to continue the family theme, a pair of cousins are next, welcome Neji and Hinata!"
The next two off the boat were obviously family by their identical eyes, pale eyes that made them appear to be blind, although both could clearly see just fine. The boy, Neji, was wearing a white gi with a brown covering around his waist, reaching down to his knees. He also wore a white headband over his forehead similar to Kakashi's, although his wasn't tilted over an eye, rather it held back his long brown hair that reached back to his hips. His expression was blank for the most part, but he did send the occasional side eye glare at his female cousin.
That aside, he very much fit in the pretty boy category, and both Temari and Tenten were giving him appreciative glances.
Hinata wore a baggy purple sweatshirt with white accents on the sleeves and baggy ninja pants. Unlike her cousin, her long indigo hair fell backwards naturally in a straight sheet, stopping only a few inches higher than Neji's. Unlike Neji's stone cold demeanor, Hinata was almost curling in on herself, her posture hunched and nervous.
"As fate has decreed." Neji said as he strode past Kakashi, not returning the jaunty wave the man gave him."
"Rude." Kakashi said as he shared a small wave with Hinata who ducked her head and darted to the others as the sound of the next approaching boat could be heard.
"Alright, time for the one with the most unusual hair that we could find, Sakura!"
Kakashi was correct in his analysis, for the next contestant ninja had bright bubblegum pink hair falling over her shoulders to the center of her back over a sleeveless red shirt and pink ninja shorts. Aside from that, her most noticeable feature was a slightly oversized forehead.
"Cha." She scoffed at Kakashi's introduction of her. "I'm here to win so don't forget it, Shannaro."
"Mah mah, if you say so Sakura." Kakashi dismissed her with a wave of his hand, the other twitching towards the pocket in his vest where he stored his precious orange reading material.
"Talk all you want, but I'm gonna be the one who wins this thing." Kankuro gloated to Sakura, who gave him one look before replying.
"Said the crossdressing catman."
Kankuro squawked again and had to be held back by his siblings from taking a swing at Sakura who just brushed past him to stand near Neji and Chojuro, who were both silently observing each arrival with a keen eye.
"Coming up on the halfway point here." Kakashi continued, "They aren't a direct family, but they were raised like that, the three childhood friends, Ino, Choji, and Shikamaru!"
Like the sibling set earlier, three people laden with bags stepped off the boat next. The first was decidedly more...porky...than the rest of the ninja competitors. He wore a green light jacket over a cream shirt with a large red kanji for food on it and a white scarf around his neck, with light brown hair sticking up at all angles form his head in a scattered mess.
The second looked like he was half asleep and had his black hair tied up in a high straight ponytail, almost like a pineapple. He also had a pair of simple stud earrings in his ears made of a dull silver. Other than that he was dressed extremely similar to Kakashi himself. Long black shirt and pants covered by a thick green vest.
The lone girl of the trio had long blonde hair tied back, with just enough bangs to cover one of her pale green eyes. Her clothing amounted to barely more than a two piece swimsuit in a dark purple, emphasizing her assets and a pair of fishnet leggings up just past her knees.
"Come on you two, enough putzing around, I've got a competition to win and I won't have the two of you dragging me around." Ino marched her two friends forward and both carried all the bags of the group while Ino carried nothing herself.
"Troublesome." Shikamaru muttered, a hand twitching towards a pocket on his vert while Choji pulled a bag of chips out from somewhere on his person and started munching.
"Win, dressed like a skank, good luck with that." Sakura scoffed, immediately drawing her into Ino's focus.
"And you think you will with a forehead like that, I'm afraid all that thing's good for is cheap advertisement."
Both girls slammed their heads against each other, growling slightly and glaring until the 12th competitor drew both their attention.
He was wearing a high collared dark grey shirt that was open in the front, revealing a portion of his toned torso with a red and white fan logo on its back. His black ninja pants were largely covered by a purple waist covering that was held to his body by a large purple knotted rope that also held a straight sword to his side. His hair was a shaggy and unstyled black like his eyes, but seemed to fall perfectly around his face and spike backwards at just the right angle.
"Welcome Sasuke, hope your journey was a safe one." Kakashi greeted as Ino and Sakura's eyes were popping out of their skulls.
"Hn." Was Sasuke's only response as he wordlessly rolled his suitcase towards the line of contestants.
""DIBS!"" Ino and Sakura yelled simultaneously, then turning and glaring at each other once again, threats and insults muttered at one another under their breath.
"As amusing as this is, I think someone needs to break them up." Tenten said dryly, arms crossed over her chest as a flick of her wrist sent a kunai knife flying between the fighting girls.
Both were trained enough to jump backwards and avoid it, but then turned their glares at the bun haired girl.
"She is right you know, times a ticking and the next group is here!" Kakashi interrupted any escalation of the argument by pointing at the next boat, also carrying three people on it.
"Is he just having us arrive in groups to save money, I wanted to introduce myself without lumpy and lazy dragging me down." Ino muttered to herself.
The new trio were a diverse group. The lone boy had dark skin and a shock short white blonde hair. He had a lollipop in his mouth and his dark eyes were flitting across the group in front of him rapidly. He wore a grey hoodie with a white handled sword sheathed over his shoulder and simple black ninja pants.
The other two were both female, and vastly different from one another. The first had dark skin like the boy, but long crimson hair rather than blonde covered partly by a white head scarf. She wore a torn olive green sleeveless battle shirt and black battle skirt, a sword similar to her male companion's slung over the opposite shoulder.
The last had drastically pale skin, a yellow-blonde bob cut, and cold blue eyes that scanned everyone carefully. The dark grey battle kimono that ended just above her knees struggled to….contain all of her, not that she seemed to mind the stray eyes that were coming her way from the boys assembled, all except the stoic trio, Neji, Gaara, and Sasuke. Like her other two companions, she also had a white handled sword, perched on her shapely hips rather than over her shoulder like her companions.
"Oh no." The boy started, his teeth clenching around his candy. "So many competitors, and they all look so strong. What if they just stomp us? We'd bring shame to sensei! And then he'd be really mad! And he'd start to up our training! And he'd probably force us to start rapping like he does!"
"Shut up Omoi!" The redhead slammed a fist into the boy's, Omoi's, head. "The last thing we need is you projecting right now!"
"Karui, Omoi, neither of you are staying very cool right now." The last member of the trio told them, giving them a soft, but still cold, glare.
"Yes Samui." Both replied, making it very clear who the leader of the group was.
"Hmmmm." Kakashi pondered as the trio lined up with the others, everyone sizing each other up still, a tension starting to build as more young ninjas joined the lineup. "The more I see of the contestants, the more I realize that the audition videos were a lot more real and a lot less staged than I thought they were."
"Next up, from some training dungeon and looks like he's never been in direct sunlight before now, Sai!"
Kakashi's explanation could not have been more spot on. The next ninja contestant had skin so pale it was almost translucent. His hair was inky black and cut short, but with bangs still framing his face. He wore all black, making him appear even more pale than he already seemed, and while the black ninja pants were normal, the tight ninja top he wore ended just above his lowest ribs, exposing his entire cut abdomen to everyone. Any appeal this might have had however, when one looked at his face. Eyes dead of almost all emotion and a crepey smile stretched across his face.
"Hello everyone." Sai greeted, raising a hand in greeting, tilting his head as his creepy smile grew larger. "I hope we all become friends in this competition."
As he fell into line with everyone else, the rest of them all took a small step away from him, and he kept smiling, taking no note of this.
"Oooook then." Kakashi said, hand once again twitching towards his book. "Next up, the last of the groups, the cousins Karin and Naruto!"
The female cousin had hair even more red than Karui's burnt red and Gaara's crimson, matched by her bright red eyes that were trailing up and down the row of ninjas already assembled before focusing in on Sasuke.
"DIBS!" She shouted, pointing at him with a look of triumph on her face as her purple coat shifted in her action, doing little to cover the short black hot pants she was wearing, leaving her legs more covered by her legging than the pants themselves.
""I ALREADY CALLED DIBS!"" Ino and Sakura both shouted back at her, storming forward and the three got into a three way galring match before Karin's cousin interrupted them.
His hair was a sunlight golden blonde and he had three whisker-like marks across each cheek, just below his shining blue eyes. He wore a two piece bright orange jumpsuit with black accents on the shoulders. Back in the line of ninjas, Hinata almost swooned at seeing him, only just able to hide her reaction from her cousin, but blushing deeply all the same.
"No point in fighting yet Dattebayo." Naruto said, "And there's no point in focusing on that Teme, he looks like he's got a stick shoved so far up his ass all he can taste is wood."
"SHUT UP NARUTO!" All three girls yelled at him and Sasuke gave him a harsh glare.
"Dobe." He spat out at the smiling blonde, speaking for the first time since he arrived on the island.
"Hehehe." Kakashi giggled at the arguments and rivalries already forming in front of him.
"Next up, close runner up for strangest hair, only beaten by the bubblegum princess," Here Sakura turned away from glaring at Naruto to glare at Kakashi.
Once again, Kakashi was not wrong, as the newcomer had bright mint green hair, held in a simple bob cut by a long hair piece the same shade of orange as her eyes. She wore a two piece outfit like Ino, but hers was clearly meant for maneuverability rather than seduction. All white except for a red x across the top half, the white arm sleeves and skirt complimented her tan skin well.
"Hi everyone, my name's Fu, I hope we can all get along!" Fu greeted everyone, getting excited waving and smiles from Naruto and Choji, but most of the others were just observing her carefully.
"Alright, in line with you." Kakashi shooed her away, where she moved next to Gaara and gave him a cheerful smile and wave, which Gaara returned with a raised hand in greeting, his lips never twitching from their resting position.
"Next up, showing less of his face than me, Shino!" The boy stepping silently off the boat was dressed in all olive green and black, the hooded overcoat he wore covering all of his hair and the high collared black shirt covering the entirety of his lower face. He also wore a black headband like Kakashi and Neji covering his forehead and a pair of sunglasses over the entirety of his eyes.
He simply nodded silently in greeting to everyone before falling in line, getting more than a few creeped out looks.
"Creep." Kankuro muttered under his breath, earning him a slap from his sister and several critical glances sent his way.
"Down to the last 4, let's get these ninjas on the island so things can really heat up, introducing Lee!"
The next contestant wore a white and blue training gi, his shiny black hair falling in short ruffles around his head. What stood out most however, was his MASSIVE eyebrows.
"YOSH!" He shouted in greeting. "It is a pleasure to meet everyone here, may we compete well." He told everyone with a smile.
"Oh boy, I feel like I'm going to regret letting you on." Kakashi muttered to himself, shooing Lee towards the line up.
Upon seeing Sakura, Lee seemed to blitz across the dock, appearing in front of her on one knee and holding her hand in his two.
"Fair maiden, I have never seen one as attractive as you, do me the honor of going on a date and I'll protect you with my life!"
"All your's forehead!" Ino laughed at Sakura whose own eyebrows were twitching at the thing in front of her.
"Not a chance freak!" She shouted at him, yanking her hand out of his grip harshly.
"YOSH!" Lee shot back to his feet with a determined look on his face. "Then I shall just have to win this competition to prove myself to you!"
"NOT ON YOUR LIFE!" Sakura yelled and stomped away from him and the cackling Ino, making her way towards Sasuke and fluttering her eyes at him, which was completely ignored.
"And while that's been happening, our next contestant has arrived." Kakashi noted, pointing over his shoulder with a thumb at the girl who had just arrived. She had extremely short black hair, barely falling over her ears, and faint pink eyes. She wore a brown armored vest over a light red short jumpsuit, fishnet leggings starting exactly where the jumpsuit ended. The jumpsuit itself had only one sleeve, covering her whole left arm while the right exposed an impressive musculature. Her right leg on the other hand had a dark red mantle around it, giving her whole look an asymmetrical bend.
"Name's Kurotsuchi." She greeted blandly, simple but not overly so. With that said she fell in, not showing any interest in what was happening before she arrived, coming to a rest next to the Samui-Omoi-Karui trio.
The next competitor was already disembarking when Kurotsuchi got in line. Wearing a turquoise blue and white lined outer jacket, and an olive-green/brown turtleneck and skirt, with a matching scarf holding the ensemble together at the waist. The new ninja had long hair pulled up in a covered bun, leaving two strands of long brown hair to frame their delicate facial features.
"This Is Haku everyone, say hi!" Kakashi said, earning a wave and coy smile from Haku.
"One question for you Haku, and I'm sure it was a small oversight, but you forgot to fill out the gender portion of your application form, so if you could just check the box that applies that'd be great!" Kakashi said, holding out Haku's mostly completed application form to them.
"Of course Kakashi." Haku replied in a gentle voice that was completely androgynous. A quick motion later, Haku handed the form back to Kakashi who eyed it carefully before turning back to Haku.
"You checked both male and female this time. How am I supposed to know what cabin to house you in?" This time there was noticeable strain in Kakashi's voice.
"I'm sure you'll figure something out Kakashi." Haku dismissed him before sashaying into the lineup, ignoring the looks they were getting from both the girls and boys already assembled.
"And now for our final competitor, Kiba." Kakashi announced, crumpling up the paper he was holding and tossing it over his shoulder and somehow making it into a garbage can randomly placed behind him, leaving those who noticed goggling at the feat, although that wasn't as many as it could have been based on the newest arrival's entrance.
"WAAHOOOOO!" A messy brown haired boy with red fang like tattoos on his cheeks leapt off the boat, a cocky smirk covering his face. He wore dark ninja pants and a leather jacket zipped over a barely visible mesh top.
"Look no further for your champion, last to arrive and last to leave, I've got this in the bag!" Kiba cheered, strutting up the dock.
"Big talk now, but we'll see what you've got Dattebayo." Naruto challenged, a similar smirk covering his face.
"Yosh, a challenge like that cannot go unanswered, I shall face you head on." Lee exclaimed, clenching his fist and matching glares with Kiba and Naruto.
"Fate has already decreed I am to be the winner, not some deadlast squad of idiots." Neji weighed in, staring down the trio and looking down his nose at them. Hinata gave a soft 'eep' as Neji turned the full weight of his glare at Naruto, who shrugged it off effortlessly.
Even the stoic and broody Sasuke was throwing his weight in the competitive spirit of things, not speaking but taking small steps forward to let the loud four know that he too accepted the challenge.
"Mah mah, save the competitiveness for the actual competition." Kakashi scolded them, loosely waving a hand back and forth as if clearing away a bad smell. "For now let's take a commemorative photo, to frame the moment."
After several minutes of people shuffling, the group of 24 young ninjas were aligned on the dock, making a wide variety of faces at Kakashi and the camera, ranging from scowls to Sai's demented creey smile.
"Say 'ninja'!" Kakashi asked cheerily, making a hand motion behind his back to signal his surprise for the teens.
"Nin-"
The dull response was cut off by the flash of the camera and the collapse of the dock beneath them, sending all 24 unexpecting teens into the water below while Kakashi gave a giggle at the site.
"Oh, what a fun show this will be." He said, eye smiling at the camera with a thumbs up, completely ignoring the cursing teens behind him promising bodily harm.
**Camera Static**
Is starting a new story when I have so many unfinished smart...no. No it isn't. Do I feel bad for not posting anything in so long and just wanna get something out there, yes. Been on a Total Drama binge for the past month, I blame my real life friends for running a survival style game within our friend group, and while I've read planty of Naruto added to the normal cast of Total Drama fics, shout out to What a Dramatic Life for being a great read, I didn't find one where it was ALL Naruto characters...so I made one.
General summary is that no one has chakra, they're all just normal humans with ninja training of the modern era. Are my personal biases going to play a part in how the story goes. Yes, that's my job as an author of fanfiction, to let my opinion influence the story in a new angle. Am I going to bash characters...well I'm going to try not to. At the very least the plan is to do everyone justice, but some characters just won't get much screen time, or get lost in the dialogue of the more popular/vocal ones. I'm going to try and post weekly, for as long as I can at least, but I am still working on my own original novel, which is actually almost done and onto the editing process, and college life is a thing, but hopefully I can finish at least season 1 of TD before my inspiration for the story fails me.
So happy reading and sending thoughts of hope to Ukraine -Centurion Africanus