The Hofstadter Marriage

Chapter one – the wedding

Leonard

Penny and I got married yesterday. Yes I know total shock to both of us. But now I'm alone in my apartment with Sheldon in the next room while Penny is in her room, in her apartment. It's my fault. I completely fucked up. Not today, years ago, when I was at the north sea I kissed someone that was not Penny. Her name was Mandy, and I still see her at work. Penny wasn't happy about that either. Which I can't blame her. Penny said she was okay with it, so we still got married.

It was such a lovely service, just me and her in Vegas, I had written vowels pretty much as soon as we got engaged. But, as usual, she stole the show with lyrics from 'You've got a Friend in me' from Toy Story she came up with it there and then. She always knows exactly what to say to make me laugh, or cry. This is my favourite song from my favourite movie. Then it all went wrong again. We were kissing, getting ready to consummate the marriage, I wanted her and she wanted me, we were so close to being together for the first time as man and wife and then it just stopped, she looked away and asked me all these questions about what happened with Mandy.

I'm so sorry that it happened, I felt guilty as soon as it happened, I feel guilty every time I see her, I don't see her socially, only at work. I don't want to see her socially or at work. I really don't think Mandy ever thinks about it, I don't really think about it. I just wanted Penny to know everything, so we can start this marriage with a clean slate, I didn't want this to happen. I love her so much but I think she may never forgive me. I think I may have ruined my marriage before its even started. I really hope this isn't the case. I want to hold her, to be with her, to make love to her. But I've ruined it. I don't know what to do or say. I still have hope…

Our babies will be smart and beautiful.

Penny

I can't believe this. Leonard cheated on me when he was in the north sea. He kissed some other girl called Mandy. I hate her, I've never met her but I hate her. Leonard was supposed to be my man, he was the one I trusted no end, trusted with my life, trusted to be there for me every time, trusted with anything, literally anything. I told him about my many pregnancy scares over the years. I told him when my exes cheated on me. I told him how Kurt used to abuse me and hurt me and use me, I'd never even told my Dad that. Now the person I thought I could trust the most has betrayed me and he chooses our wedding day to tell me.

Oh, yes, I hadn't said that had I? tonight we got married in Vegas. I was so excited, so looking forward to it. Eloping with the man I've wanted for nine years, even though I didn't admit it to myself, and now I find out he has been kissing someone else. I told him I wanted him to keep his mouth off other women, he promised that the only thing allowed to touch his mouth now was me and food. He promised it meant nothing, but I can't get it out of my head. We did get married, I told him I could get past it. I hope I can get past it. He had some beautiful vowels written, and all I could think of was some stupid lyrics from Toy Story. I know its his favourite movie, and his favourite song from that movie, but it just seemed so stupid. I don't know what to think now. I want to be married to him, but part of me wonders if he still wants to be married to me.

I love him, I want him, I need him. I need to sort this out with him, I don't want to finish this marriage before its really started. I need to get over this and consummate this marriage and spend my life with him. I'm sure I can, I need to call Mom, and maybe Lisa too, they'll know what to think, what to do, what to say.0