Summary: Aragorn spends time with Alida and Leonid. Eldarion comes to a startling revelation. Rated T by Caitie and Savannah
(Words written in bold are spoken in Elvish)
Year 21
The morning sun was glinting off the dew, covering every leaf and petal in the garden with crystals. Aragorn closed his eyes and remembered many, many moons ago before Eowyn and even Legolas, when he had been just a young man growing up in this city. His mind harkened back to when he was just younger than Eldarion, when he had not yet left to join thee Dunedain. He remembered a night, it must have been the summer solstice he thought to himself, when Arwen had worn small crystals strung through the lengths of her dark hair. He could still see her smile from that night in his mind when they had danced together under the stars. Even as a young man Arwen had treated him as an equal, a friend, his cousin so far removed and yet more like a sister to him. Elrond, the only father he had ever known, had been her father; and her twin brothers, the closest things to siblings he had ever known. They had been separated by so many years, not sharing a childhood, that they were not close like Eowyn and Eomer had been, but they were family still. Their love for each other only growing more and more with the years they spent together.
She felt close to him now, back in his homeland, wandering the gardens Arwen used to grace. Her loss tightened his heart as it did every time he thought of her. But in Imladris, her spirit didn't feel so far away. As if the space between his world and wherever she was, was somehow closer. He had felt her call and wondered if it was the same call Eowyn had heard, kike a wishing for a home he had not yet been to. As he rounded a bend, the stone statue of her figure emerged before him.
"Arwen," Aragorn said under his breath, looking up at her gentle face. He said it like a prayer, one he had prayer so many times before. But now his prayer had changed, he no longer wished for someone to be kept on this earth with him. Now, he wished only to be taken away from it, to rejoin those he had lost.
A smile cracked across his face as he looked at Legolas' stone form towering over him. If he could see him now, praying to their statues as if they were benevolent gods, he would laugh and tell Aragorn that his mind had finally gone. As he looked up at their faces his mind did slip, but into a memory, as if he were dreaming as he stood in the garden.
He saw them riding together, Arwen turning in her saddle to smile back at Legolas. He saw Legolas in battle, the way his body moved with a fluid grace that was his alone, his twin blade singing as they moved through the air like he danced more than fought. He heard the clink of metal on metal and saw Arwen join Legolas in his dream; their bodies moving together like they were made of the same matter, cut from the same cloth, two pieces of one whole.
Aragorn turned his head and watched as they crashed into the grass at the foot of the statue, rolling through the grass, blades singing once more. Strike for strike, they were dancing with one another to music no one else heard. He turned and watched them, his hands clasped behind his back, smile spreading across his face. Arwen knocked Legolas' feet out from under him with a movement so far it was only a blur to Aragorn's eyes, she pinned him down in the grass. She looked up at him and as their eyes connected the dream melted away. Dark hair dissolved to copper and it was Alida looking back at him, Leonid pinned under her.
Alida smiled back at him a little embarrassed and let go of Leonid's arms. He sat up, knocking her off his lap and turned to follow her eyes. "King Elessar," Leonid said, climbing to his feet, bowing his head slightly.
Aragorn smiled, "Please, call me Aragorn," he said, although he had already told both twins to call him by his name and not his title on many occasions before. "Or Estel," he smiled, glancing back at the statue. "That was the name your grandfather gave me before I learned of my true parentage.
Leonid bowed his head again.
"Estel," Alida smiled, cocking her head to the side. "Hope?"
"It was a lot of pressure for a two-year old." Aragorn winked, walking to the stone bench as sitting down. "Do you two often try to kill each other for sport?" He asked.
Alida smiled at Leonid out of the corner of her eye. "We are always trying to find who is the better fighter."
"So far we haven't been able to determine a winner," Leonid finished, cross his arms over his chest. His arms flexing with the movement in a way that made Aragorn wonder if he did it on purpose he smiled, seeing the boy's father in his posture and inherent confidence.
"I do not remember the white city," Alida said softly, moving closer to Aragorn almost hesitantly, but the smile he gave her melted any hesitation away. He looked at her with the same love in his eyes that she saw when he looked at Eldarion and Awena, like she could never do anything to lessen his love for her. He looked at her like he knew every part of her and loved every single piece. She smiled back, wondering if his smile was one of a father, if her own father would have smiled at her like she was incapable of doing wrong.
"I came here to sit with your parents awhile," Aragorn said, his eyes shifting back to the stone. "I was remembering how they used to fight when you two came along. You move like them," he said.
"Really?" Alida asked, sitting next to Aragorn. Leonid moved to stand behind her, his hand landing on her shoulder.
Aragorn nodded, turning to look at the siblings. "No one could move as they did. They made everything seem effortless. You remind me of them so much," he said, smiling sadly. He touched Alida's cheek softly.
"I would like to hear about them," Leonid said. "We only hear stories from our uncles."
"We want to know about the time you spent with them," Alida finished. "If you have the time," she added.
Aragorn smiled, even the way they spoke seemed to be connected. "As me anything," he said. "There is nothing I would rather do than share my memories with you. I have so many," he said, glancing at the sky as if he could see them there, like the clouds were brush strokes telling the stories of his life.
Aragorn smiled as he spoke, staring at the statues of the people he had known as well as he knew himself. He told them about their times laughing by a fire, how they had grown together, cried and bled together. He told them how everything Legolas had ever done had been for Arwen, how the world faded until she was the only thing he wanted to look at. How Arwen seemed incomplete without him by her side. He told them that they were each other's life, their love.
Alida's eyes dropped when he spoke and he noticed how she was smiling to herself. He remembered how when she was a little girl, she had watched Eomer's wedding, her face aglow. Aragorn had caught her staring when he touched Eowyn. A girl in love with love. He smiled as her face seemed to light up at her parent's love story, and he prayed that his son would give her the love she deserved.
Leonid had moved to sit in the grass as he listened, his arms resting on his knees. His face held a faraway look and his eyes were hard with emotions held just behind them. "Were you there?" he said, his voice hardly more than a whisper.
Alida turned to him but he didn't meet her eyes. "Where, Leonid?" She asked.
But Leonid looked up at Aragorn and the older man nodded. "Yes," Aragorn said slowly. "I was there for both."
Alida looked between them.
"You saw them die?" Leonid asked.
Aragorn shook his head; he rubbed his thumb over his palm as his mind went back to those days. Days he would never be able to forget, memories he hated. "War isn't like that," he said softly. "You cannot see everything like a hawk flying overhead. You only see what is directly in front of you; the sword trying to stab or the spear trying to pierce or the arrows in the air. Everything is blood and mud and chaos."
Alida closed her eyes at his words, it was hard to imagine this loving man cutting through armies. But she had watched him fight with Eldarion and she understood why men had followed him into battle.
"But I was there when Eomer took your father from your mother's arms," Aragorn said. He bent his back leaning his elbows on his knees as he spoke, as if the weight of his words pressed down on him physically. "A part of me changed that day in a way I can never get back to. Watching them carry him away as I held her, trying to hold her heart together. But she broke in front of my eyes."
Alida felt tears spring into her eyes and when she looked at Leonid she saw his jaw flex with emotion.
Aragorn took in a shuddering breath, the emotions he had felt on that day on the stairs of Minis Tirith came flooding back to him. The exhaustion he felt in his bones, the blood that coated his skin; and then when he had seen her, the drop of his heart. When he saw her dark hair on the white steps and the crimson blood that was pooled under her, it felt like he had been sliced open and his organ had fallen out of him. He had lost his sense of hearing, only the sound of his heart pounding in his ears, and his sight had blurred by hot tears until he only saw colors. He had held her in his arms then and known that she was broken beyond repair, and he could nothing to put her back together. He had failed. Failed to comfort her, failed to protect her, failed to bring her back to her children. And as he looked at them now, he felt his failure again.
"Your parents loved you," Aragorn said and hoped his voice held the conviction of the truth he knew with every fiber of his being. "They did everything to protect you and give you this life." Aragorn looked up at Leonid and watched the emotions move across his face, the sadness and the loss and then anger, he understood them all.
"I wish they would have given up less," Leonid said coldly. "And come back to us."
Alida blinked and the tears in her eyes fell onto the fabric of her dress, feathering out along the sheer fabric.
"I wish that too," Aragorn said, surprising them both. "I had no children," he said softly. "It should have been me."
Alida shook her head, drawing her knees up to her chest and holding them tight. Without Aragorn there would be no Eldarion, she thought. But she saw Leonid's face and she kept her thoughts to herself.
"I am sorry," Aragorn said. "I'm sorry that I couldn't bring your parents back to you. I'm sorry that you had to grow up without them."
Alida wanted to open her mouth, to tell him that it wasn't his fault, that he had done everything he could, but again the look on her brother's face silenced her.
There was a long pause and then Leonid spoke. "Thank you," he said. "Most people remember their sacrifice, but not our loss," he said and he met Aragorn's eyes.
Alida shifted and laid her hand on Aragorn's. "Thank you for telling us about them. I do not imagine it was easy for you."
Aragorn smiled at Alida and squeezed her hand. "I'm glad to have time with you," he said. "I wish there was not such a great distance between us. I count you both as family and it pains me to be away from you."
Alida nodded and Leonid bowed his head once more. "Perhaps it doesn't have to be this way," Alida said softly.
Leonid looked up at her.
Aragorn smiled and stood, offering his hand to Leonid, pulling the boy to his feet. Then turned back to Alida, offering his hand and took it standing. Together the three walked under the shadow of the stone statue.
..::..
"Perhaps it doesn't have to be?" Leonid's voice echoed down the hall after his sister. "What does that mean?" He called after Alida as she retreated to her suite.
"Nothing," Alida said with a sigh, her hand coming to rest on the brass handle of her door. She looked over her shoulder at Leonid who stopped just a mere foot from her, clearly waiting for Alida to open the door for the both, unwilling to let her retreat to privacy. She pushed open the door with an exasperated shove. "I meant only that perhaps things would change. Perhaps we could travel south and visit for a season." Leonid closed the door with a bang behind them and Alida gracefully lowered herself onto her favorite chaise lounge, picking up her earlier discarded book and setting it open on her lap.
"So you mean to visit?" Leonid asked, his tone implying that he still did not believe her.
"There's a whole world out there, Laio." Alida looked up as Leonid threw himself onto the foot of her chaise. He picked up her legs and settled them over his lap so he could lean further into the seat. "Don't you want to see it? You heard Aragorn when he spoke of everything he had seen, and the adventures he had with mother and father."
"Then let us see it!" Leonid said, his voice raising with his temper. "You know I want to see the world, Lida. Don't pretend that you do not know that." He twisted to look at her. "But why south? Why not west towards the Shire, or even east to Mirkwood. Imagine the trees and we would be with more of our kind. Wood Elves, just like father. There is nothing in the south for us. The south took them from us. It took father and mother and it will take you from me as well."
Alida could see the fire in his eyes and could hear the struggle to keep from shouting. "The south did not take them," she said, her voice just barely above a whisper, a tone she knew would calm his soul. "War took them."
"War in the south!" Leonid said, this time failing to keep his temper in check and shouting at her. He stood suddenly, tossing Alida's legs to the side as he rose. He strode angrily over to the balcony and threw the glass doors open, letting in a cool breeze. He turned back to her, a fire still blazing in his deep blue eyes. "You're doing this for him! You're willing to give up this place, your home, your family for him!" He gestured to the valley and then stormed through the open door disappearing onto the balcony.
With a sigh, Alida closed the book and set it back on the velvet cushion she rested on. She knew where this outburst was coming from, knew it had been coming for weeks now, since the day after the solstice festival. She knew this was jut his concern coming out, not real frustration or anger with her. She rose and quietly padded her way towards him. His back was towards her, his arms resting on the banister as he stared blindly at the forest and river below them. She wrapped her arms around him and pressed herself against his back, locking her arms around his abdomen. She rested her cheek on his back, and felt the tension hardening his body.
"I'm not giving them up for him," Alida whispered. "Nor am I giving you up, Laio. Eldarion could never take your place in my heart." She felt his body soften, and a hand came to rest on where her arms overlapped across his abdomen. "You are and always will be a piece of me. You are the mountain that keeps me grounded. You are my home, more than this place will ever be; you, Leonid, are my home."
They stood in silence for moment, not needing words to communicate how they felt towards each other. "There are no forests in Gondor," Leonid said with sigh, his voice soft and quiet. Alida knew this was a voice no one but her ever heard.
"No," she said with a soft, sad laugh. "No, there is not. But I do believe there is one tree."
A laugh escaped from Leonid, short and rough, knowing he had lost this battle with his twin.
"Besides," Alida said again, releasing her brother only to shift to stand beside him. She grabbed his arm and curled it around her shoulders as she leaned into him. His arm tightened around her in a familiar and protective way that she would always treasure. "I believe you may have missed it, but I had intended for you to come with me."
"There would be no stopping me," Leonid said, pressing his lips to the top of her head.
..::..
Eldarion walked with his head down, one hand rubbing the palm of the other absentmindedly. He smiled to himself, unable to keep his expression neutral as he thought of Alida. He wondered if he would be able to focus on writing letter when he had found such better things to do with his hands.
"What has you smiling like a fool?" A voice said, snapping Eldarion out of his thoughts. His feet slowed at the venom dripping from the words and his eyes found Leonid lounging languidly by the window. The male Elf was laying sideways in a large chair, one leg draped over an arm, his back resting on the other. The light shone through his hair, lighting it to flame so much like his sister's. But where Alida's felt like a warmth Eldarion wanted to bathe in, Leonid's hair looked like a fire that would burn. The Elf's head turned painfully slowly to look at Eldarion, his blue eyes piercing. He was stunningly beautiful, cut as sharply as a blade, and just as cold and unforgiving. Eldarion had never seen him in the library before, and he had a thought that Leonid had come knowing Eldarion would be there. He quickly dismissed it, why would the prince of Elves wish to find him?
"So Prince?" Leonid said, as if he had heard Eldarion's thoughts.
Eldarion lifted his chin slightly, remembering they were both princes. "I did not realize that smiling was outlawed here," he said. "Or is it just you that it offends?" He asked, the smile in question long since dropped from his lips.
Leonid slid from the chair to stand, closing the gap between them. "Only when the reason for that smile is my sister, and that smile is on the face of one so below her it makes me laugh to think he believes he has a chance." Leonid looked down at Eldarion, tilting his chin ever so slightly in a way some might have attributed to his grandfather Thranduil. "Soon enough you will leave and go back to your country, your life will be so short it will end before my sister can think to miss you. You will be but a momentary blip, a mistake of her youth easily forgotten."
Eldarion swallowed but before he could open his mouth to reply Leonid had smiled down at him cruelly and turned. He watched him move towards the door, then took a breath and called after him. "What have I done to earn your hate?" He asked, opening his palms and holding them out in Leonid's direction. "You love Awena and yet treat me as if I am an enemy at your doorstep. Our parents were like siblings to each other. Should we not love each other as family?"
Leonid took a step back. "Do not speak of my parents," he growled.
"I love your sister," Eldarion said, and it felt as if he had taken his heart still beating out of his chest and held it before Leonid, like a book open to his deepest secrets.
"You do not even know sister," Leonid spat. "And you do not love her. You are infatuated by her, there is a different and believe me I know it." He stepped in closer to Eldarion as he spoke, looking with disdain at Eldarion's offered palms. "It is only I who loves my sister," he said.
Eldarion looked down at his hands and let them fall back to his sides, shaking his head.
Leonid scoffed at him, watching him shrink before his eyes. He turned and walked towards the door, anger burning inside him.
"I have only wished to love you as my brother," Eldarion said softly.
Leonid paused for a breath in the doorway, then left without looking back.
..::..
Soft morning light filtered through the vines, growing over the windows, illuminating the room of white stone. All around Eldarion papers and books lay scattered, their dark ink contrasting the white all around him, a mirror to the dark clothing he wore. Alida watched him for a moment, glancing to the mural painted in dark colors behind him. She smiled at the way the light played in his golden hair, so different from her ancestors.
"Working on your letters, pupil?" She said, stepping out in the room. But she wasn't met with his smile, instead his brows were knit together, his blue eyes dark and shadowed like an ocean storm. "So, it's going well then," she said with a smirk, clearing a place to sit beside him.
Eldarion knew it was bit the work that had him so upset, and yet he pushed all of his anger and hurt into them, trying to block Leonid's words from his mind. It is only out of love for his sister, Eldarion tried to tell himself but he didn't know how love could fuel hate.
"I just can't understand why in some cases words are used in past tense, but in others the same words are present," he mumbled, deep creases forming on his forehead.
Alida smiled softly, taking the papers from him slowly. "Have you heard of artistic expression?" She said, drawing his eyes up to her own. "Poetry?" Again, she was met not with the smile she wanted, but a face of frustration. "Eldarion," she said moving the book from his hands, letting her fingers brush his hands softly.
Eldarion looked into her eyes and began to forget what had been troubling him. His eyes worked over her face feature by feature, her deep eyes framed by soft lashes, the light pink of her cheeks and finally landing on her mouth. Forgetting his earlier work, he studied the curve of her lips, watched as they parted slight as she took a breath to speak.
"Eldarion," she said again, drawing his eyes back up to hers. "Why are you so troubled?" Alida asked, tipping her head to the side, her hands lifting to his face. She worked her fingers over the creases in his face, smoothing them with her touch. "Even storm clouds blow over to reveal the sun," she said softly, letting her hands drift to his cheeks.
Eldarion's hands lifted slowly to cup her own, holding them close, closing his eyes at their velvet feel on his skin. When he opened them again Alida was closer to him, her leg brushing his own. Eldarion watched in wonder as she smiled, leaning in close, then touched their lips together. She smiled like lilies, he thought to himself just as he tipped over the edge into their kiss, his mouth working over hers. She opened her mouth for him as his hands traded placed with her, touching her face so gently. He gasped into their kiss as her hands landed on his chest, sending a jolt through him. Then as quickly as it began Alida had pulled away from him, she stood over him, her hands on his shoulders.
"See," Alida said. Her smiled radiated light over him. "The world is not only grey and sadness."
Eldarion's head swam, his eyes filled with tears as he looked up at her, the light filtering through her hair, turning it to fire. Then she was gone and he was left seeing stars, realizing he had been holding his breath, scared even a breath might disturb the perfection before him. He leaned back, slowly letting his head rest on the arm of the low bench he sat on. He asked himself if he had dreamed what had just happened or if Alida was an angel from some other realm. She was too beautiful, too kind, and too wise to be of this world, he thought to himself. And yet, she had smiled at him, touched him, even kissed him. He sucked in air, letting it out in a shaking breath and closed his eyes, trying the memorize the smell, the feel of her and, and the honest taste of her lips. If it was a dream, he thought to himself, it was a good dream.
..::..
Golden light filtered through the drooping boughs of the great willow tree. The midday sun shone brightly down on the valley of Imladris, bathing everything in a warm glow. The valley was vibrant with life, animals scurrying from bush to bush; birds flitting in a flash of color through the trees, the babbling of the river that wended its way through the valley floor, the chirping of birds, and the soft voice of Eldarion as he read in Elvish.
Eldarion stopped his reading, waiting to hear Alida protest, but she said nothing. Closing the leather tome, he looked down at the auburn-haired head that rested in his lap, her eyes closed and her breathing even; she had fallen asleep. Eldarion smiled as he took in Alida's sleeping face. The sunlight glittered on her skin and her eyelashes were the color of copper in the light. He ran a hand through her long hair, twisting the curls through his fingers contentedly.
He felt a pinch in his chest, not the usual tightening he felt when she smiled at him. This feeling was pain as he realized that his time here with her was coming to its end. In a few weeks they would be returning to Gondor, and though he usually loved his home, he found that he didn't want to leave. Eldarion's brow furrowed at the thought, a month left with Alida. Would she come home with him? Would she want that and could he even ask that of her? Her whole family was here. Would he return to see her? What if this was all they had, this together and nothing more? His heart ached and he ushed the thoughts from his head, refusing to think of the future for fear of ruining the present.
Alida stirred and Eldarion felt his blood flow south as her head gently rolled across his lap, a need rising in him.
"You stopped reading," Alida said lightly.
Eldarion looked to her face and the sleep in her eyes caused his heart to stir. Her eyes looked almost seductive under her heavy-lidded gaze and he again felt his body react to it.
Alida rose a hand to curl behind his neck and she pulled his lips to her as she rose, claiming his mouth in a slow tender kiss. She pulled away, but only just, and their breath mingled between them as she ran a thumb across his lips. "I like listening to the sound of your voice," she said, a lazy smile on her lips.
"And I like kissing you," Eldarion said, his voice dropping into a husky tone as he succumbed to her. She smiled at him, her eyes alight with a blue fire and his lips claimed hers. His body ached for her and he let it control him, pulling her ever closer as his lips hungrily met hers. She met his passion eagerly, fisting her hands in the fabric of his shirt.
Alida shifted until she was straddling Eldarion's lap, the fabric of her yellow dress pooling around them as she settled above him. A moan escaped her lips as she felt the proof of his arousal against her core and Eldarion felt himself harden even more. He groaned at the contact, wanting nothing more than to be as close to Alida as possible, especially as she rocked her hips against his. His arms wrapped around her body, hands roaming across her back. He could feel the laces of her dress down her spine and for a moment he thought of pulling them loose.
A rustle in the brush broke the kiss, both Alida and Eldarion pulling apart and searching for the sound. Alida found it first, her keen eyes spying the source of the noise across the river, just outside the curtain of the willow's branches. She smiled and pressed a finger to Eldarion's lips as she opened his mouth to ask her what she saw. She lifted her other hand and pointed to the spot, mouthing the word "quiet" as her hand left his lips. Eldarion peered around her, his arms still holding her against him, his body still aching for hers; and he spied a stag bending its neck to drink from the river. Neither of them moved as they watched the deer, so oblivious of their presence.
Alida turned and smiled brightly back at Eldarion, twinning her arms around his neck. She looked deep into his eyes and Eldarion felt like he could get lost in her deep blue depths. He once again felt that pain and fear for the future. He wasn't sure if he would be able to go back to who he was before coming here and being with her. Alida, seeming to be able to read his mind, stroked his cheek tenderly. He nudged his cheek into her palm, savoring her gentle touch. "Don't think about the future," she said, her voice low. "Stay with me in the present." She kissed his other cheek and then his forehead, the feel of lips lingering on his skin. Her words echoed through his mind, "stay with me in the present, stay with me."
..::..
The early morning sun shone through the leaves above Eldarion, weaving them into beautiful lacelike patterns. He took a long deep breath, tilting his head back, letting the dappled light warm his skin. In his mind's eye he pictured Alida's smile, the warmth he felt when she looked at him was so similar to the warmth of the sun. He felt the corners of his mouth turn upward at the thought of her, a feeling of bone deep contentment settling over him. He realized he had never felt like this before, giddy and drunk on the love of her; so happy he couldn't even remember the feelings of inexplicable sadness and despair that had plagued him so often in the past.
Eldarion dropped his head, but couldn't banish the smile on his face as he walked through the long grass deeper into the forest. He moved branches aside as he went, the loose white shirt he wore fluttering around hm in the warm breeze. It was so early and yet it was already warm, a thin layer of sweat covering his skin.
Eldarion's mind wandered as he walked, he knew it was too early for Alida to be awake and he pictured her laying in her bed, her face innocent and open in sleep. He wondered what it would be like to wake up with her body next to his, he would trail his fingertips over her perfect skin, tracing the curve of her shoulders and the dip of her back. He felt a blush creep up his cheeks as he imagined pulling the sheets back and touching every inch of her skin. He knew that he could never grow tired of exploring her, that every day he would worship every square inch of her. He could barely understand how every part of her body ignited him, that only her fingers on the spine of a book or the light playing through her hair was enough to drive him mad. The glimpse of her bare feet from under her dress had his heart racing and the arch of her collarbone took his breath away. Then his mind reminded him of what he had seen the day before, the curve of her bare breast and his insides throbbed. He thought of the warmth Alida pressed against him, he ached at the memory of that feeling and how close his hand had been to touching her. He imagined what it would be like to stroke the most silken parts of her, to touch and taste her core.
Swallowing hard, Eldarion looked around the clearing he had found himself in, so lost in his thought that he was actually lost as well. The shirt he wore clung to his skin, sticky with sweat; he longer for the touch of the cool breeze he had felt earlier. He pulled the shirt over his head, running the fabric over his face once and he then hung it over a low branch in the sun to dry. As he stood in the clearing, a cool wind filtered through the trees, sending the leaves to rustling and cool his bare skin. It was like Alida had heard his wish for her touch and sent the wind in her place.
As he sat down in the long grass Eldarion chuckled to himself, perhaps he was giving her too much credit. But if one day he found out Alida was the goddess of the woods, somehow trapped in an Elven body, he wouldn't be shocked. He'd build temp0les and devote his life to her worship. Awena could rule Gondor, because he would spend his life barefoot in the trees to be near Alida.
..::..
Awena sat curled up on a small couch, her knees brought up to her chest, resting a glass of cold tear on their tips. She smiled thankfully as her father filled the glass to the brim once more then sat next to her drinking his own glass of the honeyed mixture.
"You look tired, Awena," Aragorn said, smiling softly at his daughter. "Did you go on an extensive tour of the taverns with Leonid last night?"
Awena's eyes widened and she hid momentarily behind the rim of her glass, startled at her father's accuracy.
Aragorn chuckled to himself, it wasn't often that Awena reminded him of her mother, it was Eldarion who held her spirit inside him. But now, as she smiled apologetically at him, he saw Eowyn in her face. He reached forward and tucked her hair behind her ear, letting his thumb run over her cheekbone tenderly. He tried to memorize the look of her for a moment, of how open her face always was and how she looked at him like he was everything in the world to her. Awena smiled and shifted to lean her back into his chest.
"I may have drank more than a fair portion of Elvish wine last night," she confessed. "Leonid is a terrible influence on me."
Aragorn laughed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "You need no influence to be bad, Awena," he said, kissing the top of her hair. "You have been spending a lot of time with Leonid though," he continued. "You two make a good pair."
Awena spun in her father's arms. "Father! He is my friend!" She exclaimed. "Nothing more."
Aragorn shook his head. "I know, I mean nothing more than you're a good team for finding trouble." He was happy she had found such a good friend in the child of Legolas and Arwen. Even though she had never known them, it seemed only right that his children would be knit together at least in part with the children of his best friends. They were more than that, his brother and sister. His heart ached thinking of them in this place and again he found himself wishing they could be here with him once more, if only to see their children becoming so close.
Awena shook her head, slightly exasperated and nestled back into his chest. "I'm not the child you should worry about."
Aragorn raised an eyebrow. "No?" he asked. "Are you sure about that, my wild child? You haven't been throwing yourself off of waterfalls?"
Awena chose to ignore his comment, shifting back to look at her father. "I mean between your two children, who has been spending a lot of time with a certain someone of the opposite gender?"
"Alida and Eldarion," Aragorn said. "Those two were written in the stars I think."
Awena rolled her eyes. "They certainly seem to think so," she said, wrinkling her nose. "They spend every waking moment together. That's the real reason I spend so much time with Leonid. Because my own brother has abandoned me, and if you asked him, Leonid would say the same thing about Alida."
Aragorn smiled at her; in some ways she was still such a child. She was still so soft, not hardened at all by the world
..::..
Eldarion opened the pages of the well-worn book. He had brought it along when he had thought he would spend most of his time alone and reading. But this was the first time he had found time to read, and even as he scanned the words that he knew almost by heart, his mind wandered from the beautiful Luthien to Alida. He couldn't help but compare himself to Beren, hopelessly in love with the immortal Elven lady. He smiled as he read and imagined himself having the epic adventures of Beren like he had always done when he was a small boy reading the story. He lost himself in the love story in a way he had never understood before then.
The sun was high in the sky as he reached the end of the book, but Eldarion didn't notice as the hours drifted by, his eyes flying over the words, his heart rate rising with every page. Where before the book had brought him peace and hours to forget who he was and live through the words, now they made his stomach turn and a cold sweat had broken over his skin. As he reached the end of the book, he didn't see Luthien's life draining away, but instead it was Alida he saw, a book falling from her hands, her lips gone pale. Eldarion swallowed the lump in his throat, his fingertips brushing the page, dreading the words even as he read them. Before he had loved the tragedy, had dreamt of a love so strong they would be willing to die for one another. But now, as he read the words, they took on a different meaning. He knew beyond a doubt that he would lay down his life for Alida, he would die a thousand times over to protect her; but he was mortal, he was cursed just as Beren had been to love one whose life would be many times over as longer as his.
As he read the last lines of the book and Eldarion watched Alida die in his mind's eye in Luthien's place he felt his heart breaking. Tears streaked over his cheeks and he felt like he couldn't take a breath. Wet spots appeared on the page s as he read the final lines, he couldn't bare the thought of Alida's life ending like a rose cut while it was still a bud, never given the chance to fully bloom. He felt robbed, like love had been a dream of happiness dangled in front of him. When he left Gondor, he felt like he had jut learned to live with his sadness, to hold it inside him like a weight forever in his chest, but one he could still live with. But when he had arrived in Rivendell, had breathed the air of this place, had laid eyes on Alida, it had been lifted. When he had felt her love like warmth settle over his body, it had left him completely.
Eldarion thought of Alida in his arms, their foreheads touching and how she had never been so happy. How he wished he could find the words to tell her that he thought it wasn't even possible to be as happy with her That she was the one who had taken that weight from his chest and set him free. But now the sadness came crashing down on his again, so heavy he thought it would crush him.
Eldarion felt the book slip from his hands and the world seemed to tip for a moment. Then he was running, his feet flying through the underbrush, his arms pumping as he sprinted back in the direction of the hall. He had thought he had lost himself in the forest, but his feet seemed to carry him back of their own accord as he ran, his shirt and book forgotten in the glen.
..::..
Awena had just left her father alone in their chambers with a stack of letters from their homeland when she met Leonid in the hall. He was dipping his head to a beautiful Elven maiden, the state of her dress and hair a suggestion as to why Leonid was not in his wing of the hall or why he seemed to just be getting out of bed in the middle of the day.
"Are you trying to make me jealous?" Awena asked.
Leonid spun slowly on his heel, yawning and stretching is arms over his head. "Why do you seem to think everything is about you princess?" He said, walking aimlessly in her direction. "I've been bedding Inithel long before you arrived in this city?"
"And she happens to live in the guest chambers of the Lord of Rivendell?" Awena asked, crossing her arms.
"No," Leonid answered, towering over Awena, "She works in this area. Did you think your bed magically made itself every morning? It's how we met actually. You become well acquainted with the woman who tidies your room every day, it's very intimate. It only seemed natural that she enjoys my bed before she cleaned it. Plus, she has access to every room in this place and I have been with her in almost every one of them."
Awena rolled her eyes, shaking her head. "You're sleeping with your servant?" She asked.
"Don't be rude, Awena. Inithel is no servant." Leonid spun on his heel once again and began walking to the bend in the hall. Awena followed beside him, her legs moving so much faster to keep up with his long stride. "So, little legs," Leonid began to say when a blonde blur came around the corner and slammed into his chest, knowing his breath out in a huff.
Eldarion's eyes met Awena's for a moment and she took in a sharp breath. He was shirtless, his chest heaving, his eyes were red and Awena could see where hot tears had cut tracks on his cheeks. "Eldarion?" She asked, her voice laced with worry.
Leonid cut her off. "Where is my sister?" He asked, his voice dark.
Eldarion didn't answer. "Is it true?" He asked, his voice husky with emotion, his hands balled into tight fists by his side.
"Is what true?" Leonid asked, narrowing his eyes and drawing himself up to his full height to stand over Eldarion.
"Is it true that if Alida gives up her immortality that she will die?" Eldarion almost screamed.
Leonid didn't answer, a muscle in his jaw ticking.
"Is it true?" Eldarion yelled, his hand fluing up, his palms connecting with Leonid's chest, shoving the other man back half a step.
Leonid's expression darkened. "Yes," he said flatly.
Eldarion let out a strangled sound and pushed his way between the two figures, running down the hall. Worry clawed its way up Awena's spine. She knew her brother's soft heart all too well, and to see him so distressed made her heart ache for him.
"Does your brother not grasp the meaning of mortality?" Leonid said, crossing his arms over his chest and watching as Eldarion ran full tilt down the hall.
Awena was in no mood now for Leonid's smart replies and she balled her fist, hitting him as hard as he could. Leonid cursed at the sharp pain in his arm and turned back to Awena. "Do not speak about my brother like he knows nothing," she growled, her grey eyes hard as ice. She took a step forward to follow him down the hall, but Leonid caught her arm, holding her back. She fought to get away firm him, but he held her tight, his fingers wrapped all the way around her thin arm.
"Wait, Awena," he said. "He is upset. Let him speak to your father."
Awena tugged away from him again but Leonid caught her other arm, holding her still.
"There is nothing you can do for him now," Leonid said gently. "Let him ask for your father's help then you can go to him."
Finally, Awena stopped struggling and looked up at Leonid. "He's my brother," she said, her eye brows knitting together and her voice cracking with sadness.
Leonid nodded. He understood the way it felt to be so close that he felt the pain of a sibling as if it were his own.
"Will she really die if they lay together?" Awena asked, looking up at hi with huge eyes. "Eldarion… He's never… He's never been with anyone," she stammered. "Would their union kill her? Is his mortality really so toxic to her?"
Leonid smiled softly, his grip relaxing on her arms, but he did not let go. Awena was never this vulnerable, she played at innocence well, but she was strong. Leonid knew in that moment that if he were her enemy, Eldarion would be the weakness in her carefully crafted shield. She would do anything to spare him pain. He realized her carefree playfulness had been crafted as a way to ease Eldarion's sadness, she had always been there to lift his spirits. He brushed his thumb over the skin of her arm once, understanding that he was Alida's protector as Awena was Eldarion's, and she would guard him with her very life.
"Eldarion would not kill Alida," Leonid answered softly. "They could lay together and Alida would continue to live on in immortality."
Awena shook her head, not understanding.
"What I fear is that my sister could not lay with Eldarion and not give him everything. She would not be able to give her body without giving her heart and soul as well. She would give up her immortality to be with him, to live a mortal life like yours."
Awena's face crinkled with emotion. "And that would be so terrible?" Awena said softly. "Is my life so short and meaningless to you?" She tried to hold back her emotions, but a single tear slipped from her eye as she came to the conclusion that Leonid say her as a momentary playing, a blip of amusement in his never-ending lifetime.
"Awena," Leonid said, his shoulders softening and he moved one hand to brush the tear away with the back of his fingers. "Your life is not meaningless to me," he said, his voice full of conviction. Awena looked up at him, her face looking like a small child waiting for reassurance. He nodded and smiled at her, his demeanor uncharacteristically gentle. "I fear watching my sister die long before me," he said almost under his breath, his eyes darting away from Awena's. "I would be so alone in this world without her."
Awena lifted her hand and laid it over his heart, knowing how hard it was for him to voice his fears.
"But it's not only that," he breathed. "When the life of the Eldar leaves us, it is dangerous. Elves become sick and only the strong can keep their mortal life as their immortal one leaves them."
Awena blinked. "Alida is strong," she answered softly.
Leonid nodded and let his arms slip from Awena's arms, straightening back up. "But maybe now you can understand that I do not hate your brother," he said, looking away. "What I hate is the thought of losing my sister."
..::..
Aragorn looked up from his letter as Eldarion crashed through the doors, his bare chest heaving, his face shattered by grief. "Eldarion," he said, standing and moving around the desk. Eldarion stopped, the heels of his palms coming to his brow, his back bent as tears streaked his cheeks. "My son," Aragorn said, reaching for Eldarion as he sank to the bench near the desk.
Eldarion's body shook with a silent sob, his lips pulled back over gritted teeth. Worry pricked at Aragorn's heart as he sat next to him on the bench, his hand landing on Eldarion's damp bare back. Eldarion had always carried the world on his shoulders, his emotions always near the surface; but now he cried like his world had been ripped away from him. Eldarion's entire body shook, his hands slipping to grab fistfuls of his hair, pulling on his blonde curls so tightly, it was a miracle they didn't rip.
"Eldarion," Aragorn soothed, trying to meet the boy's eyes. "My son," he said again, his heart breaking for him as he watched him cry. Aragorn pulled him to his chest and he fell into his father's arms, his body shaking.
"Alida," Eldarion choked out.
Aragorn sighed and pulled Eldarion into an embrace, holding the back of his son's head tohis shoulder like he had done so many times when he was small. "I'm sorry, Eldarion," Aragorn said. "I should have spoken with you sooner. I thought you understood the sacrifice she would have to make."
Eldarion pulled away, looking at his father. "I cannot ask her to make that sacrifice," he said, his voice so broken. Aragorn had to blink back his own emotions. "I will not ask her to risk her life for me," he said, his voice hardening with resolve.
Aragorn reached his hand to touch Eldarion's cheek, wanting to wipe away the tears that pained him so much. "She loves you, Eldarion," he said. "I have seen it in her eyes with every look she gives you.
Eldarion swallowed hard, looking down. "I love her as well, Father. I love her more than my own life, but I will not let her give up her immortality. I will not let her risk her life for someone as unworthy as I am."
"Eldarion," Aragorn said softly, lifting his son's chin to meet his eyes, as blue as the evening skies. He looked at him wondering how he had ever come to think of himself as unworthy of love when Aragorn and his mother and even his younger sister had given it to him with no question. "You will be king," he said, stroking his thumb over his son's jaw lovingly. "You are worthy of her as your queen, not because of your birthright, but because you are kind and loving. And I know you would cherish her above all else. You are a man I am proud to call my son." Aragorn adjusted his grip so he held his son's face in both of his hands. "But do not become so arrogant to think you can make this choice for her. Do not disrespect a gift so precious and one she is willing to give."
Eldarion pulled away from his grasp, groaning under his breath as if the pain in his heart was physically breaking it. "It is not arrogance, Father," he said, standing and backing away slowly. "It is from my love that I must leave her. I cannot, I will not ask her to make that choice for me."
"Eldarion," Aragorn said, standing, his hand outstretched.
"If I must be a king," Eldarion said coldly. "Then find me a wife in Gondor. I will bear children wither so that your line may be continued, Father. But do not ask me to love her, for I will leave my heart here when we depart. That is my gift that I give willingly, but I cannot take hers for I will not be the one to end a life so beautiful."
Aragorn's hand dropped slowly as he watched his son retreat away from him and deeper into himself, closing all the door to reason for fear of letting in another drop of pain.
At his father's silence, Eldarion turned and fled in the direction of his bedroom. When he reached the room, he slid the lock closed and went to the window, closing the heavy curtain one by one, the bright sun blinding. He slipped onto his bed, closing his eye he wrapped his arms around himself and wished for one terrible second that they had never come to this place of eternal life and beauty and that he had stayed in the cold stone city of his people, where his heart had been heavy with loneliness. But better it be heavy than shattered into jagged tearing pieces.
..::..
The afternoon was cooler than it had been the last few days, the storm of the night before had blown over but left behind some of its cool air. Eldarion tried to retrace the path he had taken the day before when he had lost himself in the beauty of the woods, his mind too full of Alida to care where his feet took him. Now his mind was just a full, but where before he had been full to bursting with love, now he felt followed out and empty. Perhaps it had something to do with his lack of supper the night before or breakfast that morning or even lunch. He couldn't eat, could barely wet his mouth with water, let alone eat a meal. He had told Awena to lie however she saw fit, make some excuse for him. He could not face Alida, he could not see her smile or feel her touch under the table. He was still too soft, too willing to cave into his selfishness. He knew that one kiss would crumple his resolve and he could not do that. He had to steel himself, go back to the hardened boy he had been before he opened his heart to her.
Finally, he caught a glimpse of white hanging in the trees and recognized the place he had hung his shirt, Now, it hung limp in the tree, its hem dripping with rain water. Eldarion took it down from the tree, beginning to squeeze out the water, the drops rolling over his hands like the unshed tears that were behind his eyes. He thought of the feeling of Alida's hands on his bare chest and the pressure of her chest on his and she screamed, whipping the ball of fabric as far as he could into the underbrush.
Eldarion stood in the clearing, his chest heaving with emotion when his eye caught on the book left abandoned in the grass. He stooped to pick up, its spine swollen with water and the ink on the pages running into blue clouds on the page. Eldarion's heart sank, the book he had loved since boyhood was ruined, his own stupidity to blame. Could he have not picked it up before he ran? He cursed himself and laid the book back down in the grass, then cursed himself again. How many times had he read that story and yet he had forgotten Luthien's sacrifice? He had been blinded by his love for Alida that he had forgotten the ending of their story was already written, the mortal man and the Elven princess. Fitting, he thought, that the book should stay here rotting until it became a part of this place. All his boyish dreams buried where they died.
Eldarion stood and began to walk once more, again he did not care where his feet took him, he wanted only to waste away the day so that he could find his bed again. When he thought the sun had shifted in its place in the sky, he began in the direction he thought would lead him back, but his feet led him to the shores of a slowly moving stream. He looked up at the sky and breathed a heavy sigh, there had been no stream on his way from the hall. He followed its bank, his head downcast, his body heavy until he reached a small stone bridge. He stood at its foot, lost in a memory of a night where he had sat next to Alida on a bridge just like this one. When he had felt like he was floating, carried along by her beauty and summer's night. He closed his eyes and tear a tear trail the length of his nose.
"Eldarion," he heard her voice call and he opened his eyes, expecting to find himself in a dream once more. "Eldarion," Alida said again, her voice laced with worry and he saw her standing on the other side of the bridge.
Alida took a step forward and then another, her heart pulling her forward without thought. She had missed Eldarion the night before and had wished to bring him to her grandfather's lookout, she had imagined them watching the storm crash around them, holding onto one another. She wanted to run to him now, to throw herself into him and let his strong arms catch her, but something about him held her back, her steps slow and warry.
"Alida," Eldarion breathed out, like her name was both a curse and a blessing. He moved forward in a run and they met at the top of the bridge.
"Eldarion," she said, laying both of her hands on his shoulder, her fingers brushing over his neck lovingly. Alida's brows knit together in worry. He looked pale, the golden hue to his skin gone and where her hands drifted down his body, he felt hollow, his skin pulled tight over muscle. "Are you well?" She asked, looking up at him.
Eldarion closed his eyes. "No," he said under his breath, stilling her hands as they brushed over his chest and down to his stomach. He caught him in his own and held them tight. He brought them to his mouth, kissing her knuckles. He had meant to stop her hands, meant to kiss them in a gesture of respect. But the feel of her skin still drove him mad and so he held them tight, turning them over in his own to kiss her palms.
"What troubles you?" She asked, taking a step closer so their bodies brushed together. Alida wanted to take him in her arms, hold him close and make him forget whatever sorrow he had, but again something in her held her back.
Eldarion opened his eyes and ever so slowly dropped her hands, his fingers brushing her to the very last m second, the end of their contact feeling like parts of him were taking their last breaths.
"What has happened?" Alida asked, her brow knitting together. "Where have you been? Is there news from your homeland?" But even as she asked, she knew that Aragorn had been at dinner the night before and had eaten with them again today, and even if he had been quiet, he had said nothing of trouble from Gondor.
Eldarion shook his head. He searched his mind for the right word and could not find them. "My heart is yours," he said softly. "It will forever belong to you."
Alida smiled and touched his cheeks. "As is mine yours."
But Eldarion shook his head, taking her hand away from him. "No," he said, as if the word itself would break him. "No, Alida, you must not give it to me."
Alida looked up at him and found tears pooling in his eyes.
"I cannot take it from you," Eldarion breathed, the tears slipping down his cheeks. "I cannot take your immortal life."
Alida's brows drew together. "What are you talking about, Eldarion?" She said, fear clawing its way up her spine, dread pooling in her stomach.
"I cannot ask you to come back to Gondor with me," Eldarion said slowly, like every word cut a knife deeper into his flesh. "I cannot ask you to give up your life here with your people and most of all I cannot ask you to give up your immortality, to risk yourself. Not for me." As he spoke, his eyes drifted from hers and in his mind he vowed never to meet their crystal beauty again. Eldarion knew if he found sadness there, sadness he had placed there, it would break him.
"You didn't ask," Alida said, dipping her chin to try to meet his eyes. "I gave." He turned his face away from hers, tears dripping off his jaw. "I gave my heart freely to you, Eldarion, and I would give my life to be with you no matter the length." She paused, gathering the courage to speak the words she had not told him yet, but knew with every fiber of her being "I love you," she said, her voice shaking with emotion and conviction. "I love you and I want to spend my days beside you. I want to wake up with you next to me and go to sleep every night in your arms. I want to stand beside you as you become the king you were born to be, and give you children, watch them grow together. I want to close my eyes for the last time and your face be the last thing I see." She laced her hands on his wet cheeks and forced him to look at her. "I want your life and your love and I want to give you mine. I am in love with you, Eldarion. nothing else matters to me."
Eldarion met her pleading eyes and everything in him broke, shattering into pieces. He touched her forehead with his own, letting his hands find her waist for one last time, pulling her close and breathing in her scent. His head slipped to her shoulder and he held her as tightly to him as he could, his body communicating the goodbye he could not form with words. He lifted his eyes to look into hers and she smiled at him through tear-stained cheeks, running her hands through his hair. His closed and forgot himself for a moment, let the hardness of his heart melt away and touched their lips. He groaned as his knees buckled, bending to pull her into him like he was trying to consume her with his kiss, she tasted like heaven. Then he forced himself to pull away from her, immediately cold without her touch and ran his thumb his over her lower lip as if he could erase his taste from her lips. Restore her to how she could have been before they had ever met.
"I love you, Alida. I will always love you," he breathed, taking another step back, letting the distance grow like a slowly opening wound between them. "I love you and I will not lose you," he said finally.
"Lose me," Alida repeated, her voice broken, tears streaming down her cheeks, his lips red from their kiss. "By leaving you are losing me. How can you not see that?" She said, her words coming like gasps of pain.
Eldarion said nothing, only stared at her as emotion boiled and roll off of her in waves; hurt and anger and the overwhelming feeling of her heart breaking.
"Do you think you are so noble?" She said under her breath. "You think yourself so selfless for taking yourself away from me before I can give myself." She looked up at him and Eldarion thought he might drown under the weight her eyes. "You are an arrogant princeling, Eldarion," she said, her voice low and authoritative. "Thank you think you can take this choice from me. My love was a gift that I gave you freely, it can be taken away just as freely," she said softly. She turned, knowing her words were a lie, that she could never take her heart back. She walked away, never turning back to look at the boy she loved more than life that her chest was empty and her heart was with him, beating bloody in his hands.
..::..
Awena cracked open the door if her brother's room, it creaked as it swung open slowly. Eldarion lay on his side on top of the blankets, it was late but he was still in his clothes from the day. "Eldarion," she whispered, but he did not reply.
The moonlight glinted off his eyes but he made no move as Awena walked towards him.
"The sun was hot today," she said quietly, sitting on the edge of his bed. "Did you see it?"
Eldarion shook his head slightly.
Awena stared at her older brother, wondering how she could heal his broken heart like she had done so many times before with a joke or a playful game, but she knew this time was different. He would have to heal his own heart. "Tomorrow, will you go riding with me?" She asked, but Eldarion didn't answer. "I have barely ridden Fola since we got here."
Eldarion closed his eyes and thought of his sister's mare, given to her by their uncle and named for the horse they mother rode into battle, Windfola. He tried to remember his mother's smile, but all he could see was the golden hazy warmth of her long hair. His eyes squeezed shut harder as his memory flashed, the blood dripping from its tips as his father held her dying. He would never let that happen to Alida; he wouldn't hold her at all if it would spare him from holding her lifeless body.
"Elly," he heard Awena say and then he felt the mattress shift under him and Awena's arms wrap around him from behind, her body cuddling close to his back. "I'm worried about you," she said, her breath warm in between his shoulder blades. He wanted to answer, to tell his sister everything would be fine, but his throat felt like sandpaper and he was afraid that if he opened his mouth only tears would come. So instead, he took her hand from around his waist and tucked her arm under his to hold her hand close to his chest. "Eldarion," she said quietly. "Sadness is a sickness too. I don't want to watch you fade away into it." She sounded so small as she spoke, her voice quiet and high like a child's. Eldarion rolled over to face her, still holding her hand between them on the bed. "Please come riding with me," she said. "Just you and I."
Eldarion closed his eyes and nodded. "Alright," he said. "Tomorrow morning we will go riding." He opened his eyes and saw Awena smiling. His lips moved in reply, but even he knew it was more a grimace than a smile. He squeezed her hand and rolled back onto his side facing away from her, his arms wrapped around himself like he was trying to keep from breaking apart.
Awena tucked herself into his back, her arms joining his. "You are not alone, Eldarion," she said into his neck and held him tight until she heard his breath grow slow and heavy with sleep,
..::..
The moon lit Imladris in a pale silver glow, the white stone of the buildings seeming to reflect the light of the moon back into the city. The night air was deceptively cool for how warm the day had been, a precursor to the approaching autumn season. A breeze rustled the leaves the trees, it seemed to carry Leonid as he walked through the abandoned gardens, guiding him to whom he searched for.
At dinner his sister and Eldarion had both been noticeably absent and he felt a pull in his chest and knew in his heart what had happened. Leonid had seen Eldarion the other day, had seen the panic in his eyes and heard in his voice when he realized the sacrifice Alida would have to make to be with him. He knew it was a matter of time before he ended things, he knew there was no ignoring or accepting that fact for Eldarion. A piece of him had wanted to warn Alida, to prevent her from enduring that pain, but every time he had opened his mouth and tried, he stopped himself. After dinner he had searched the forest for her, had made the two-mile trek to her willow tree only to find she was not there. He had scoured her other hiding places, their grandfather's lookout, their mother's library; he had even gone to the stables to make sure Isilme was still here. His sister's white mare was there however, her coat silver in the moonlight, so his sister must be as well.
A breeze had reached him then as Leonid was leaving the stable, and when it touched his skin, he knew it was sent by his parents. The moonlight lit a path and the breeze carried him forward, he trusted it implicitly to bring him to Alida.
Leonid took long strides through the garden, knowing now exactly where she was hiding. He strode through the walls of greenery into a private garden, and immediately he saw her. Her lilac-colored dress was stark against the deep green grass she sat upon; her skirt haphazardly wound about her legs. She looked up at him, her eyes dry, not a tear in sight. "I knew you would come," she whispered and her voice broke his heart. To anyone else Alida would look fine, unaffected by the day's events; but Leonid saw the hollowness in her eyes where usually they twinkled with life, Leonid alone could hear the sadness in her tone.
Taking the last few steps that separated him from his sister, Leonid sat down gracelessly beside his twin. She looked forward, her eyes not meeting his, as she pulled a bottle of liquor that had been hiding under the layers of her skirts. She passed it to him wordlessly, looking up to the statue of their parents. He took the bottle from her with a chuckle. "I see you're prepared," he said. He looked up to his parents and raised the bottle in salute before ripping the cork out with his teeth and then taking three large gulps.
Alida turned to him finally and Leonid's heart clenched at the sight. Her eyes were glossed over with tears she would not let fall. For as long as he could remember Alida had always been like that, never one to shed a tear from sadness or pain, the tears were always trapped just behind her lids. "You know you can cry," Leonid whispered to her as he set the bottle down on the bench behind him. "You know it's safe with me."
Alida shook her head and pursed her lips together. "What did I do?" she asked.
"Nothing," Leonid said firmly, instantly putting his arms around his sister and pulling her close. "There is nothing you could have done to change his mind," he said, running his hand down her silken hair.
Alida's shoulder shook and she took in a shaky breath. He felt her body relax into his, and knew she was opening a door that was rarely opened. He felt her tears seep through his shirt and he murmured to her as she let all of the sadness escape. His sister was always so reserved, so careful with her emotions. He had known since Eldarion set eyes on her when they arrived that it would end this way. He had known, nothing good will come of this, only sadness. How he wished he could have been wrong.
"He's not deserving of you," he whispered into his sister's hair. "Not if he thinks he can live without you."