You will get your precious Eva back but Chuck, I am abandoning you!

The ghost, that's what is remained of the Blair that Chuck knew. Her voice, her face, her laughter seems like a thing of the old life, where he felt happy. He always knew Blair was one of the cruel one, he didn't knew her cruelty ran so deep, and yet he is the reason she ran away. He tried everything, every resource he had, his people, they did everything to find her but came out with nothing, he was left with the conclusion that she just dissolved into thin air. As if she was the fragment of his imagination. A beautiful mirage he built to feel loved. However all the pictures they clicked proved him otherwise; he actually fucked up and let the love of his life walk away. He felt utterly alone even in the presence of Nate or even Serena who begrudgingly used to spent time with him.

"Why are you even here?" he asked, a drink in his hand at 9 in the morning.

"Why? Should I walk out of your life too?" Serena lashed out at him without thinking twice. Her words pierced him like knife and he was ready to gulp down the scotch only for it to get snatched by her. She chugged it down as if drinking water and that's when he saw her, really saw her eyes. She may be angry with him but just like him, she is utterly alone as well.

"We sure are some sibling" he said pouring himself another shot of scotch.

"Whatever Chuck, I am out of here" was the only words he heard when she made a way towards the lift and disappeared. If only he knew this was the last time he will ever be able to talk to Serena, that she will just shut him off like he used to do all the time. Until now he wasn't aware how much Serena meant to him. She was probably the only person aside from Nate he confided in when it came to his feelings for Blair, the very first person who encouraged him to talk to the love of his life.

It was probably past 12 when his elevator dinged again and he waited for Nate to show his face but what he heard was the click of heels, he may be drunk to his last breathe by now but he knows what is going around him and he damn well heard the heels.

"Blair" he whispered. He expected to see her, sauntering in like she own the damn place, but she does own the place didn't she. Everything within his apartment is what she made of it. If the apartment has his favorite painting then it very well does contain the curtain of her choice or the cloth that Chuck usually wear.

His lips tugged up only to see not brunette but blonde goddess in his apartment.

"Eva?" he was confused. What was she doing here, that too with 2 suitcases? Everything was becoming so confusing and his head was spinning crazy, that's when he felt her touch him.

"Oh Chuck" she took his face into her hand and kissed his lips softly, it felt wrong but he let her.

"What are you doing here?" he asked confused and scared to hear her.

"Blair came to find me, persuaded me Chuck, I didn't knew you loved me this much" she kissed his lips again, this time he responded and kissed her back, she isn't Blair his mind screamed and before he could register anything he felt his head hit the pillow and he was drifting towards a sleep.

"Please let me dream about Blair" he wished and that's when he heard her, saw her, he could touch her. She was spread over his couch, just his shirt on.

While she was flipping pages of a fashion magazine with one hand, her other hand was buried in his hair, massaging the scalp with her nails. His eyes were fixated on her, etching all her beauty in his mind, he was aware he was dreaming, the only place he will get any love from her was when he closes his eyes and let his subconscious take over.

The 2 years since Blair walked away passed by achingly slow as well as freaking fast. By now, Eva adored a beautiful stone on her ring finger, drinking champagne while laughing with Lily. She had a big smile on her face as Lily lifted her hand to admire the ring.

"What a beautiful sight!" Serena said coming to his side, she had malice in her voice and he knew the reason. Ever since the return of Eva, Serena has hardly said a word to him and kept her distance.

"I hate him Nate" he once heard her say. "He drove Blair away, and here he is flaunting that.. that thing" he walked away without hearing another word.

"I thought you won't come" he said without giving her a glance, he was still looking at Eva, waiting for the butterflies, one of god's creature that Blair loved make their way, none did but her name sure made elephant dance on his heart.

"You thought right" she didn't give any other explanation on the matter and they both stood in silent.

The silent with Serena was beautiful, he felt peaceful. Her absence and silence were driving him crazy, after losing Blair, losing Serena will be hard to handle. But he doesn't know how to express what he feels. He don't know how to say the words that need to be uttered, don't know how to tell her how sorry he is for the absence of Blair and that he needs her in his life.

Eva was chatting away with Lily almost animatedly and he could see her bouncing with excitement when lily whispered something into her ear and laughed a little making Eva laugh as well.

This life Chuck has is the best life, he is surrounded by loved ones, and yet he feels incomplete, there are fragments of him missing, lost forever, never to be seen again, for somebody who could buy all the glitz and glamour he feels the hole that Eva can't fulfill no matter how hard she try and how sincerely he wish she could.

"I am going to Paris" Serena whispered beside him, and he knew what it was all about, he wanted to ask if he can join her, wanted to ask he she heard from Blair, there were thousand question running through his brain but none came out of his mouth. "Oh" his reply fell out of his mouth and stayed beside him, stinging him, vision blurred he felt a burning sensation in his mouth and his hand caught another glass of scotch from a waiter who was passing by.

"Oh" he felt his lips move and that was it.

"When she comes back" Serena started and Chuck can't help but admire her determination for the use of 'when' instead of 'if', "you better not try to mess with her" she looked at him now, really looked at him and made sure the message was loud and clear and just like that she was gone, gone away leaving the party, gone for days without a word, just like that.

As I was writing the pros and cons of continuing the blog after the adieu of my favorite, Blair Waldorf, one of you naughty sent me a pic of her getting into a town car with a minion? And here I thought this summer will be a walk through a memory lane of being grounded. Make sure to put on your sun screen people, I have a hunch it will be a burn to some. Till next time..

XOXO

Gossip Girl

After a year and 17 days I am back and yes it will be a long shot fanfic. Hope I'll be able to give you readers what you deserve. Ill update chapter every week on Monday so look forward to it. Reviews are always welcomed and criticism is a path to growth. Do share what you think, guys.. I'll be waiting.