The next day, instead of going out, Elizabeth wanted to prepare the house for the ball this evening. She wanted everything to be pink, bright, and cute. So she supervised, making sure that everything was to her liking.

Ciel used that opportunity to sneak out to the garden. Unfortunately, Sebastian had been roped into helping, so he was busy. Thus, Ciel was left alone. As he walked, he saw Soma and Maria, happily talking and seemingly oblivious to his presence. Agni was told to help out too, so they were only with Anna.

Ciel watched them and felt a pang of jealousy at the display. Here they were, having fun together, free to show off their love to the world, while he had to hide his love, had to sneak around to spend time with his demon. He wondered if there would come a time when he and Sebastian would be able to walk side by side, holding hands, without any fear of being judged.

"Young Master?"

Ciel turned around to see his butler standing behind him. "What is it?"

"Would you like to have some tea, my lord?" Sebastian asked.

"No, it's fine." Ciel declined.

"Is everything alright, sir?" Sebastian asked. Ciel rarely said no to tea, so he knew that something was troubling the young earl.

"Yes. It's just..." Ciel couldn't help but look at the other couple again. "I envy them." He admitted. "They're so happy. And everyone can see it, plain as day, while we..." He trailed off and looked down at his own hands. He wanted to reach for his butler's hand, but they were out in the open and someone could see them.

"You could have that too." Sebastian said. "Marry her and you can have that."

"Don't be daft." Ciel said and turned to him. "Tell me, will you really accept it if I were to marry her?"

"No." Sebastian said. "But if it is necessary, if you wish it... For your sake, I will."

"Then for my sake, and yours too, don't ever let me." Ciel said. "That is an order."

Sebastian bowed and placed his hand on his chest. "Yes, my lord."

"I would rather love you in the dark than pretending to love someone else in the light." Ciel said, looking into Sebastian's eyes, wanting him to see that he spoke nothing but the truth.

Sebastian opened his mouth to say something, but before he could, a loud and shrilly voice interrupted him, calling Ciel's name.

"Ciel! Ciel, where are you?!"

Ciel groaned in frustration and a few seconds later, Elizabeth found them.

"Oh, there you are!" Elizabeth said brightly. "Come on! Let's have some tea! Soma and Maria are waiting for us!" She took his arm and pulled him with her, chattering about how excited she was about this evening.

Ciel glanced back and saw Sebastian following them at a respectable distance, his face a mask of indifference.

"What the hell is that thing?!" Ciel asked in horror upon seeing the item held in Sebastian's hand.

"This is apparently the matching cravat that Lady Elizabeth got you." Sebastian looked at his master and back at the item. He sighed. "I am afraid this one is not going to be pleasant, my lord."

"You don't say!" Ciel glared at the item. "I think she knows."

"Beg you pardon?"

"I think she knows about us and she's doing this to humiliate me." Ciel said. "Why else would she get that... that... monstrosity?!"

"Because it matches her ribbon, I believe." Sebastian said. He walked to the wardrobe to see if there was anything that would match the cravat without turning Ciel into a walking fashion disaster that would surely ruin the Phantomhive name and his own reputation as one hell of a butler.

"It's fucking pink, Sebastian!" Ciel exclaimed.

"Language, Young Master." Sebastian chided him. He pulled out a set of black suit. It didn't really match, but at least, Ciel's name wouldn't be ruined.

"Can I not wear it at all?" Ciel asked.

"That would certainly upset the lady." Sebastian said. He quickly changed Ciel clothes and fixed the cravat on him.

Ciel looked at his reflection. He was wearing white shirt, black waistcoat, black suit and trousers, and the blasted pink cravat. "I look utterly ridiculous."

"Nonsense. I will never let you walk out looking ridiculous. It will ruin my reputation."

Ciel laughed. "That's all you care about, isn't it? Your reputation. And your schedule."

"Someone has to. Otherwise, you would have stayed in bed all day and nothing would ever get done. And I do have a reputation to keep, sir." Sebastian said, grinning widely.

Ciel snorted. "Let me guess, as one hell of a butler."

"Ah, the young master knows me so well." Sebastian said. "Now, it is time. You cannot hide in here forever."

"I suppose not." Ciel sighed and they left the bedroom.

"Ciel!" Elizabeth greeted her fiancé when she saw him. "Oh, you look great! You'd look cuter with a red suit though..."

Ciel would rather hang himself than wearing red suit and pink cravat.

"My apologies, my lady, but the young master does not have any red suit available." Sebastian said apologetically. "But I believe that the cravat that my lady has chosen for him makes up for it."

Elizabeth nodded in agreement. "Yes, it does, Sebastian. Never mind that. It's fine! Come on, Ciel!"

They made their way to the ballroom and soon, the party started.

Ciel, despite his great reluctance, was forced to dance with Elizabeth. It was a disaster. Despite all of those dance lessons, Ciel was awkward and he moved stiffly. Not to mention he had to be extra mindful of his steps. His usual dance partner didn't mind if he stepped on his foot (although he would get a light scolding), but he doubted that Elizabeth would be okay with being stepped on. When the music finally stopped, Ciel let out a sigh of relief.

"Not a word." Ciel warned Sebastian when he joined the butler at the side.

Sebastian merely smirked and Ciel glared at him as he accepted the glass of champagne from his butler.

For the next couple of hours, Elizabeth dragged him away a few times, but he managed to get away and go back to his butler's side.

"Lord Phantomhive, congratulations!" Lord Harrington said.

Ciel was confused. "For what, exactly?"

"For your upcoming wedding, of course. Lady Midford said that you are getting married next year." Lord Harrington said, smiling widely.

Ciel was shocked. And then he was angry, but he forced himself to smile. "Thank you."

"I look forward to the wedding." Lord Harrington smiled and then he left.

Ciel was fuming. "Come." He hissed before walking away. He slipped out of the ballroom and stalked upstairs. He knew it wasn't proper, but he was too angry to care. They reached his bedroom and closed the door behind them.

The moment the door closed, Ciel turned around and practically threw himself at his butler, lips seeking his. He kissed the demon greedily and pushed the taller man backwards, pressing him against the door.

"I want you..." Ciel said in between kisses. His hands moved to pull at Sebastian's tie.

"We cannot, sir..." Sebastian took hold of Ciel's hands to stop him.

"Don't care. Want you..." Ciel insisted, his kisses becoming more demanding.

Sebastian grabbed his master's shoulders and held him at arm's length. Ciel struggled, but he was no match for the demon. "Young Master, I know you are upset, but this is not the time nor the place to be reckless."

"I'm not upset! I just want you! Now!" Ciel growled.

"If you cannot control yourself, I will have to leave." Sebastian said firmly.

"I can order you!" Ciel snapped, still trying his best to free himself.

"And I thought you told me that you will never make me do something that I do not want when it comes to our relationship?" Sebastian countered, his voice calm and even.

That snapped Ciel out of his state and he immediately stopped struggling. He closed his eyes, breathing heavily.

Sebastian let him go.

Ciel started pacing. "I'm going to end this. Now."

"This is not the time. You have to tread carefully." Sebastian said. "The Midfords are distinguished family ranked above your own. Not to mention, they are your family. If you make rash decision, there will be a high price to pay."

Ciel pulled angrily at the cravat and threw it on the floor. "I'm done with this game."

"And this will end. But you have to be patient and wait for the right opportunity." Sebastian said and approached Ciel.

Ciel took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. "I just..." He wrapped his arms around Sebastian's waist and rested his forehead on Sebastian's chest. "I just want to be with you. Just like them. Just like everyone else."

"You are with me, Young Master. Always." Sebastian wrapped his own arms around his mate and pulled him close.

"Always." Ciel repeated, his voice muffled by the material of Sebastian's coat. "I don't want to go back down there."

"Very well. I shall draw you a bath and then you can read. Is that alright?"

Ciel nodded.

Soon, Ciel was bathed and dressed in his pajamas. He climbed into the big bed.

"Lay with me." He patted the space beside him.

"Young Master..."

"We're not going to do anything." Ciel said. "I just want to spend some time with you."

Sebastian took off his shoes and coat before getting into bed. Ciel moved to snuggle up to him and he wrapped his arms around his master.

"You do realize that it is highly inappropriate for you to take off like so?" Sebastian said.

"Yes, I know. I'll feign illness tomorrow." Ciel said. "Don't fret. I'll not ruin your reputation. I'll paint a picture of a perfect butler of you, taking care of me when I'm suddenly feeling faint."

Sebastian chuckled.

"I can't wait to go home..." Ciel said. "Can't wait to sleep in my own bed with you. And to not have so many servants around."

"Some peace and quiet is in order, yes. Although with those four, there is no such thing. Mr. Tanaka is not included of course."

"They're definitely not quiet, but it's different." Ciel said. "It's home."

"Yes, it is." Sebastian agreed.

"Maybe if I can feign illness bad enough, then we can go home tomorrow."

"Or Lady Elizabeth would insist on taking care of you herself." Sebastian said.

Ciel shook his head. "That would be dreadful."

"At the end of the day, she does care for you." Sebastian reminded him.

"I know and I care about her too, I do. Just like I care for Edward, Aunt Francis and Aunt An. They're family, nothing more, nothing less." Ciel had calmed down considerably and had made a decision. "I'm going to talk to her and get this over with. No game, no trick, nothing of the sort. Just plain old talk."

"Perhaps that would be the best course of action." Sebastian said. "You two are no longer children and you should treat this like adults."

"Yes. I'll talk to her tomorrow then." Ciel said. "Pack up and make the necessary preparation. She wouldn't want me here afterwards."

"Yes, my lord."

"Ciel, what happened?" Elizabeth asked. "You just... disappeared last night and when I went to check on you, Sebastian said you had fallen asleep."

"I apologize, Elizabeth. I wasn't feeling well and I decided to retire early. I didn't want to worry you." Ciel said. He did fall asleep quite early last night.

"Oh, are you alright?" Elizabeth asked worriedly.

"Yes, I'm feeling much better this morning." Ciel said. "Elizabeth, there's something that I want to talk to you about."

"What is it?" Elizabeth asked.

"Can we talk in private?" Ciel asked. "Just the two of us."

"Okay." Elizabeth nodded in agreement and they went to the drawing room. They sat down across from each other and for a few seconds, the room was silent.

"Elizabeth, I want to tell you something, but I need you to listen to me first without interrupting me or jumping into your own conclusion. Can you do that for me?"

Elizabeth looked at him curiously. "What is it?"

"Can you do that for me?" Ciel repeated his question.

"Yes, fine. I won't interrupt you." Elizabeth nodded.

"Thank you." Ciel said. "Elizabeth, we grew up together, we played together, we were best friends, and I'm grateful that I have you in my life. I know that you care for me and I want you to know that I care for you too. I want you to be happy, I want you to live your best life. I want the best for you."

Elizabeth smiled widely, thinking that Ciel was finally going to ask her to marry him. She opened her mouth, but then quickly remembered that she wasn't supposed to interrupt him, so she closed it again.

"You deserve nothing less than the best. You deserve someone who can love you just as much as you love them, someone who will make you happy, who will be there for you when you need them, who will support you, and who will stay with you through it all." Ciel continued. "But that person is not me."

Ciel paused and watched the different emotions playing across Elizabeth's face, happiness morphed into surprise, before she looked at him with confusion.

"What are you talking about?" Elizabeth asked with a frown, forgetting her promise of not interrupting him.

"I cannot return your affection. I cannot be the person who will make you happy."

Elizabeth didn't even know how she was feeling, how she was supposed to feel. She just stared at him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you, but I cannot marry you, Elizabeth."

"Why not?!" Elizabeth got to her feet then, "Ciel, what are you saying?! This is... You don't mean it! Please tell me you don't mean it!"

"I'm sorry." Ciel said. "I will take full responsibility for this, but I cannot go on with our engagement."

Elizabeth was angry now. "I won't let you! You're my fiancé! We are going to get married!"

"I can't marry you, Elizabeth." Ciel said again.

"Why not?!" Elizabeth asked. "Is... Is there someone else?"

"No." Ciel lied. "This is how I've been feeling for a long time now. I thought, if we give it a try, then perhaps it would work out, but it's not going to work. I don't wish to hurt you anymore. Please understand."

"But you said we were best friends! We played together, we grew up together! We were promised to each other since we were children!" Elizabeth cried, her tears streaming down her cheeks.

"We did, we were. But I'm no longer that child. I've changed, we both have. Whatever feelings that I had back then, I no longer have them now. I don't know what else I can say to you. I just hope that you'll understand and one day, you'll find it in your heart to forgive me. I meant what I said earlier. I want you to be happy, but I won't be able to give you what you need, what you want. I'm sorry." Ciel said. "I know you're upset and angry right now and you don't want to see me, so I'll leave."

Ciel got to his feet and started walking away. But Elizabeth grabbed his arm, turned him around and kissed him, or at least, tried to.

Quicker than her, Ciel pulled his arm back and took a few steps away, out of her reach.

"Ciel, please... What do you want me to do? Whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. Don't do this..." Elizabeth said pleadingly.

"I'm sorry." Ciel said. "I know I've hurt you. I really am sorry, Elizabeth."

Ciel left the room and made his way to the front door. Elizabeth went after him, but he didn't stop. He opened the front door and saw a carriage already waiting for him and Sebastian was standing by the carriage door.

Ciel descended the steps and got into the carriage. He looked back briefly and saw Elizabeth standing at the top of the steps, crying, but she didn't pursue him further.

Sebastian climbed into the carriage and closed the door before knocking on the roof. The carriage started moving, heading to the train station. Sebastian moved to wrap Ciel's coat around him, then he sat back in his seat.

"Are you alright, my lord?" Sebastian asked after a few minutes of silence.

"Yes." Ciel nodded and gestured for him to move to sit beside him. The butler complied and Ciel leaned against him, resting his head on his demon's shoulder. They stayed like that throughout the ride to the train station. One seeking solace from the other, who readily gave the comfort that his mate needed. They didn't speak, didn't make any sound. They didn't need to.