Chapter 3

Leon met us directly as we walked through the door, triggering a silent sigh on my part. As much as I wished to simply retire to a hot meal, steaming bath and warm bed with my beloved, my duty to the kingdom came first. I hoped that Merlin, at least, would find his way to Gaius for some well-deserved rest and home comforts.

"My Lord, thank the gods you've returned. I'm sure there's quite a story to be told." Leon read me well, taking in the state of my apparel.

"Yes but it'll have to wait for another time. Tell me how Camelot fares."

We stepped into the nearest chamber and Leon and Guinevere dove into the matters of the kingdom's well-being. After hearing their report, I looked at the two of them, my strong queen and my well-chosen first knight.

"Thank you," I said. "Thank you for caring for Camelot so ably in my absence."

Leon nodded, "Until tomorrow, Sire."

I caught his arm. "Leon, one more thing. Quietly, please. Send for Lord Geoffrey to meet me in my chambers in an hour." He nodded.

"Come, Arthur," Guinevere murmured, "It's time to take your rest."

As we walked along the corridors, content in each other's silence, every well-known tapestry, each familiar chink in the mortared walls seemed to emphasize a feeling of deep relief that had been building ever since I'd spied the white towers from the forested track. It was the feeling of home. I'd been so sure I'd never see it again. Never see my beloved again. I felt close to tears.

"I'll call for a bath and a meal.." Guinevere broke off as we stepped past the guards stationed outside my rooms.

There, already waiting in my chambers, were a hot meal, a full steaming bath, and the bed with its covers pulled down invitingly. The portion sizes and plated delicacies on the table gave the definite impression of "reward". So, Merlin hadn't gone straight to Gaius, after all. The thought irked me at the same time as it warmed me. I pulled my wife into my arms and held her. Just held her.

She loved me in silence until I broke it.

"You know. You know about our sorcerer."

She pulled back to meet my eyes.

"I do know," she confirmed.

"How?"

"I stood beside Gaius as we watched him throw down lightning at the height of the battle. The look on Gaius' face and a few words were enough of a clue. I pondered it for a while then, suddenly, it became obvious."

She studied me. "How are you?"

I knew what she meant. How was I handling the revelation that turned my relationship with my closest friend on its head? I took stock of myself.

"Fine. I think." It was impossible not to grimace. "I'm over the shock, the anger and the chagrin and am progressing swiftly toward exasperation. Guinevere, I don't know what to do, only I know I've got to do something. I'm determined to do something! I cannot yet see the way forward but I know things must change. It's not right! Guinevere.." Speaking past the tightness in my throat became almost too difficult. "He's carried an impossibly heavy burden for so many years. He's been so alone."

She tugged me over to the teeming plate and pushed me into my chair. "Eat, bathe, rest. We'll talk more later."

"Perhaps bathe, eat, rest would be a better order." I laughed at her delicately wrinkled nose and headed for the tub. The bath was heavenly. I think the cold of near death finally left my bones. The meal with my wife was also incredibly restorative. I'd just finished when a knock came at my door.

Lord Geoffrey, bless his stuffy old hide, looked much as he ever had. Bushy eyebrows partially concealing a mischievous cleverness, I'd noted on occasion.

"You wished to speak with me, your Majesty?"

"Yes, thank you. I find myself in need of information."

"Information, Sire?"

"Yes. In preparation for the council tomorrow. I know records are kept for all trial verdicts and executions. I want you to bring all those relating to magic and be prepared to read them forth at the meeting tomorrow."

He looked uneasy. "That's a great many records, Sire, thousands, in fact. How far back would you wish me to go?"

"Just the last ten years."

"Yes, Sire."

"Thank you. I trust this request will be kept confidential until tomorrow?"

"Of course, Sire," he replied in a businesslike way.

"Good night, then, Geoffrey."

"Good night, your Highness."

Guinevere reached across the table and stroked my arm. "You're preparing something."

"Mmmhmm. I must go carefully. Change must come slowly and logically. If they know Merlin's secret, they'll never accept what I am about to do. And they will never accept him."

"And how will he feel about it?"

"He understands. He's the one who reminded me of how delicate the process will have to be. He's already told me that he wishes to remain in the shadows, damn him. And he's right! That's what's so galling about it."

I loved the playful twinkle in her eyes. "He's really not an idiot, Arthur. Don't sound so shocked."

"I know. He never was one no matter how convincing he was at playing the fool. D'you know, he told me, 'Might is no reason to honor a man or to put him in a position of influence'. He's right about that but he's wrong if he thinks that's why I wish to honor him. It has nothing to do with his magic! It's the goodness of his heart and his ..his ..innate nobility.." I must have taken complete leave of my senses to utter such sentiments aloud. "-Don't ever tell him I said that!"

She laughed but I felt my secret was safe.

"His common sense and bouts of wisdom have influenced my thinking for the better and I wish for that good influence to affect others on the council."

"If you want them to take note of anything he contributes, then you must first show them that you respect him."

"Yes, but I can't shower him with gifts. How would it look if I suddenly promoted him, ennobled him and put him on the council? They'd never accept him. And as soon as knowledge of his magic came to light, people would claim that he'd enchanted me. They'd be after his blood! Perhaps his magic would be free but he would live suspected and rejected by all but his closest friends. It would be all about the magic. Guinevere, if he isn't free to be himself anymore or if he has to hide, then, in my effort to reward him, I'll have done more harm than good. I want people to respect him for more than his magic."

"That shouldn't be too hard for a man of your station to accomplish, Arthur. You are king. When you accord someone respect, others follow suit."

"I hope it will be that simple." Why did I suddenly start tearing up! I must have been bloody exhausted.

She smiled charmingly. "I guess this means that you won't be calling him an idiot and berating him in public anymore." She took my hand and pulled me up from my chair.

"No, ..I mean yes, you're right ..no I won't.. I mean.. " I couldn't even think straight anymore and must have admitted it aloud.

"There's no more need for that tonight." She tugged me into bed and there was no more thinking until the morning.