Chapter 2: Preamble
Satan does not know how humans work.
In hindsight, Satan realized he really hadn't made the best plan.
First and foremost: he'd made the mistake of assuming that the True Cross Order wouldn't send someone to find Yuri and finish the job as soon as possible. He thought he'd left their little shithole of an organization in a state of absolute chaos after the hell (ha!) he'd unleashed and that they'd be stuck scrubbing the bloodstains out of the walls for weeks. At least enough time for the demons he'd gathered under his natural thrall to whisk away him and Yukio to be cared for until he adjusted to his new body and could steal enough books on parenting to somehow figure out how to take care of a baby. The fact that he was technically a baby himself wasn't even a factor; he was the strongest demon in existence, he could handle anything!
Yet apparently the Exorcists had decided that the bloodstains and burn marks could wait until after they'd taken down the entire cause for the incident. Satan supposed it made sense to prioritize killing someone the devil favored over interior decorating. But he thought they had more common sense than that though: blood was an absolute nightmare to get out if you waited until it dried. It was why he burned anything that got bloody, or dirty in general, and was in no way due to him being a pyromaniac. Just because he liked watching things burn didn't mean he had a problem, and there wasn't anyone (left) alive who would (dare) say otherwise. His fire was pretty, who wouldn't want to watch it?
So when he'd heard enough gunshots and arias motor-mouthed to belong to an entire Exorcist squadron, Satan had panicked and decided that plans were for losers and leapt up and whisked Yukio off into the woods!
…Or would have, if he wasn't in an infant's body. It wasn't a matter of Satan's will not being strong enough, it was simple physically impossible for him to move. Or speak. Or even make sounds beyond some gurgle-spiting noise that left Satan disgusted with himself. So Satan admitted that, when it came to making plans, he left something to be desired. Like the simple knowledge that yes, a newborn was exactly as squishy as it looked and had the approximate muscular build of a vaguely human-shaped marshmallow.
That still didn't mean he could set literally everything that wasn't Yuri or Yukio on fire if need be.
It turned out that the bastard who'd arrested Yuri, Shiro, was actually quite soft. Satan had smiled when the man had begun to draw his sword, for deep within the demon a tight ball of all-consuming fire roared, growing stronger by the second and ready to burst free. He'd turn the man to ash in seconds, and if Samael was too slow to get out of the way in time, well, that wasn't Satan's problem. Except the sword was abruptly sheathed and the resolve drained from Shiro.
The flames buried in Satan's chest sputtered and died to a dull flicker the longer the conversation went on. So even Samael had no idea what had truly happened?
Interesting.