13

The blonde aimlessly strolled, not that he was careless, but hobbling along because he had no direction to go except away from that place. He'd fallen already a few times, stumbling down a long, really clean, black paved road, on the side curb of it, one that he'd never been on before; lined with huge bushy trees lit every 100 feet by street lamps. He was heading South from the Grand Suites, that he did know at least, but at a crawling pace.

He had never been this utterly shocked!

Bakugo Katsuki wasn't scared in any sort of way, but what he'd just witnessed was something he'd never before: Full silvery eyes, like spherical moons, no centers. Then Kasaya's irises fluctuated like a cyborg after he snapped him out of a demonic, murderous state.

It reminded him of a machine calibrating, data processing, like something inside him was crossing wires, short circuiting.

He was bewildered because he swore; his roommate was going to slice his brother's neck wide open, in the coldest blood, right at his feet! And it suddenly... did not happen.

Never had Bakugo felt so confused by another living person!

Tonight shook his foundation, because after what he witnessed… why wouldn't anyone else feel the same? Anyone would haul out!

But after this crazy evening, he wanted truths, unlike any other soul, he wanted those damn secrets. He still found himself rambling on inside himself, wanted to grasp all that Kasaya was. it pissed him off, because it was no longer want.

It was a need.

And now, more than any other time before, did he know… there were secrets there. Hidden, dark ones. The type of ones he liked to hear to dish on.

Again, a string was over his head with a mouse attached on the end, for him to bat it in the corner, but with a vicious, hungry need surfacing, Bakugo found himself not a cat anymore, he was an African Lion, staring red-eyed at a hunk of flesh.

"Shit!" He slowed. "STOP! STOP! STOP!" He yelled out to his wobbly body.

He slowed in the lapse of darkness between two street lights, his form doing the first thing it could think of doing; plopping itself down on the ground in a lazy sitting posture. His fingers went into the grass; no doubt he'd have to put extra soap in the wash to get the grass stains out of his dress pants now.

He was running. He knew he was.

He had to stop.

His fight or flight had got the best of him in this twisted, screwed up game he was allowing. He recognized it and had grown mad at himself.

Bakugo never ran!

Bakugo never stopped getting what he wanted!

What he needed.

He still had those blue poker chips, tinkered with them in his fingertips.

"GOD DAMNIT!" He screamed and slammed a fist into the ground; some fire came out of his palm and with high impact, blew a small crater into the side of the road right by him. High velocity. It was unstable because he was still somewhat under the influence.

He jumped away from his own power, and fell to the side, dirt falling down on him like rain, into his spiky hair, over his face, left ear ringing. Coughing.

'Shit!' He really shouldn't use it right now! He almost injured himself with his own quirk! How stupid of story that'd be! Walking into the main med-bay on UA! How ridiculous! Injured by his own power!

He wasn't flighty like this when he was fighting, when he was feeling strong, using his quirk to blow the crap out of stuff. He was balls to the wall, loud, screaming, a terrorizing sight, which he loved.

But in everyday life, he was the opposite. Erratic as hell. He just wanted everyone to piss off, to leave him alone, to not be involved in anything, or dragged into anything, to not be touched, to not be even looked at, to not be stood close to. He escaped out of situations as quick as possible or else he'd start a wicked screaming match!

He loathed how even though he was pulled into this situation, and even after seeing what he saw, that he was still interested in that blue-headed moron.

Something was wrong with him, with Satoko Kasaya, and it was illusive.

"Tha'hell is wrong with me!?" He grumbled. Lying back on the grass, now completely covered in dirt.

Similarly, he had problems. Emotional ones though. He fucking knew he did, at least he had some wisdom that he did, unlike idiots who rumbled around through life making unconscious decisions because they were either unaware of their own issues, or just ignorant.

Kasaya obviously had issues with his quirk too though, whatever it was.

Bakugo pondered. He didn't have major back-breaking problems with his explosions. He never had, they'd always been healthy and kept getting stronger as he was gained age, but he figured someday he'd reach a plateau where they'd taper off, unless he pushed himself physically each and every day, which he was already doing.

His only issue was that he was loosing his hearing. His explosions usually got too loud, and it'd leave him in a weird state, where everything was ringing for awhile, he'd looked it up, it was like a bad shell shock.

He hadn't told anyone.

But what the hell was Blue Bun's quirk anyway? He'd never got that out of him, he figured he would of figured it out by now. After encountering what he saw this eve, Bakugo guessed that it probably was something 'mental'.

Swiftly, a flash of heat came to his face as it made sense: That essay was about him! Kasaya had written a paper about himself!

Bakugo's eyes flashed back and forth watching a plane flash overhead.

The piece of material, it was brilliant what he'd penned. Eloquent, it captured Bakugo's whole attention, and raptured it so deeply, that he wrote the entire rest of it out, to study his work, to spy on B Class, yes, but to look for clues in a field of navy that laid strung out all over the couch in the lounge, cussing.

Bakugo smirked in the grass remembering how many times he'd said the F word.

But, because of doing that, getting territorially selfish over the paper stack, he'd gotten a grasp on some of his internal characteristics. Because of that choice that he made, Suki had gleaned that even though blank-looking mostly, the man who lived on the other half of the room they shared was incredibly passionate, or at least had the ability to be.

The reason this essay in particular though was so adamantly written, was because it was about a subject that was close to him. It made so much sense now.

What other reason had he (other than a decent grade) to write and research it as affectionately, except if it applied somehow to himself?

After seeing those irises move like a robot, Bakugo processed easily that the quirk Saya possessed was a mental one.

He put two and two together. The erratic eyes and the paper.

The subject was written investigative, like Kasaya was searching, quietly skimming for control patterns and congnitive adaptions on his own, comparing, contrasting, like Kasaya was desperate? Determined for resolution.

Bakugo sat up. "Dipshit." It came out calm.

That spelled it: His roommate probably has little or no control over his quirk! Whatsoever!

Bakugo irritably pulled a whole handful of grass out and squeezed it in his hand, then threw it on the road.

Tonight's event, him almost murdering his brother; it would have been a Class A sentence, years in prison! But Suki, all he, himself could mutter out was just... 'Dipshit'? That was it? How was he so easily dismissing it?

Bakugo squinted. He was madder at himself for storming off than he was at his roommate! Shouldn't it be the other way around?

He slapped the dirt off of his dress pants while still sitting. He wasn't pissed at Kasaya. Rather, surprised and tiffed off with himself. Bakugo let his deep cinnamon eyes scan the orange sky, as he'd watched the other one do earlier on the balcony.

He'd said his name. "KASAYA!" He'd screamed.

It was the first time he called him by that, by his actual name, then the guy snapped his head up suddenly and stared at him, to drop the sword on the ground, to fall heavily to the floor, like he'd been shot.

He wasn't like Deku had been.

Not at all.

That was one reason why Bakugo was surprised, astonished. He had gotten so used to Deku's musings as a child, had had so much exposure to that, that automatically in adult life, he assumed all people like Deku (with no quirks), were all the similar: Crying little whimpy babies.

Kasaya most likely was almost quirkless with no control, like Deku had been.

But what attracted Bakugo to it, was that it was a silent struggle. That was what was different. He'd never experienced someone like that before, that held that type of regard to their own personal problems. Hell, he hadn't even got a vibe that Kasaya had problems up until now, that was how silent he kept it.

The long-haired peer didn't go around belly-aching, whining, muttering all over the place. He didn't constantly bring it up, over and over and over again in conversation, like how Deku had, just to set to mourning.

What was bad was that since Bakugo had such a strong quirk from the start, it was impossible not to pick on Deku about it. The crying around he did made it so easy! He'd even pushed him up against a wall once and almost hit the shit out of him for getting too personal, asking questions about relationships with girls and such, which grossed him out! Women were so disgusting to him!

It was like Deku constantly was in his face, wanting to know everything about him, even wrote weird journals studying him! That was why he'd pushed him up against that wall that one time, other than him getting sick of the crying crap, was because he was tired of being looked at like a damn lab rat for observation!

Stop recording everything I do! Every response I have! It was downright sickening!

That was because when they were kids, since Deku didn't have a quirk at the time, Deku wanted to be him. But now that he has a quirk, he was using those old journals to study and become more intelligent about quirk differentiations. It was like he turned his once shitty life situation, into a profit, monopolizing on all the writing he did when he was younger.

It was sort of unfair. Bakugo swore to the Gods he would be #1, not that idiot!

The much younger Bakugo, as the leader of his little band of boy scouts, felt like he was worshipped by Deku when he was little. It put him so high up on a pedestal. Like a god. But now he and Deku were rivals, through and through.

Kasaya didn't do that; there was no pedestal, no looking up, and no rivalry.

Kasaya fought his own battles. His didn't go around following him. He didn't follow anyone actually. There was no one. No visitors. No friends. Except his brother.

Bakugo got the aura that the younger Satoko didn't even get along with their father by how his voice had fallen in the room about Hisashi even mentioning him earlier in the day, but even with Hisashi, Kasaya would push him off him after a while, start cussing at him to let go, like the affection was too much for him to handle.

The long blue-headed teen was just a figment in the background, like a passerby, quietly losing his shit, and not telling anyone about it.

His brother obviously the only one that knew with how he'd grabbed him up on the floor.

"Well now, tha'makes two." Bakugo noticed, he 'saw'. He fathomed that Hisashi was unable to stop him; he was practically powerless to him. Kasaya's sword skill alone was far too advanced compared to the elder. 'Shit.' Bakugo swallowed slow. But he's stopped him, stopped him by saying his name.

Something struck him: Kasaya was dangerous. That must be why the younger was so silent about what was going on with him. No mentioning. Nothing.

He was unlike Deku completely.

Deku wouldn't hurt a damn fly, even with a quirk now, he made good judgement calls, which Bakugo at least admitted. Deku wouldn't massacre, commit homicide, exterminate. That was a line they had to walk with heroism. They couldn't kill the villains, but rather their jobs were to capture them for police sentencing.

Kasaya was rogue. A problem.

And what was crazy, was that Kasaya knew that!

Bakugo knew that he knew that about himself, knew that Kasaya knew that he was dangerous, because as soon as he yelled his name, 'KASAYA!', the injured man had a moment where it dawned what he was doing, and he suddenly stopped, and instantly slammed into the ground.

Was he failing at finding ways to manage himself and his quirk?

That would suck Bakugo figured.

He chewed a hangnail off his finger, it tasted like dirt.

That'd suck really hard actually, even after all the work he was putting in, especially with that paper.

'Damn.' Bakugo spat it on the ground, had to get that nasty taste out of his mouth. He felt slightly like throwing up, but didn't want to.

He got it. He got that. Maybe he was trying to find ways to help himself first before trying to reach out to others? That just spelled trust issues.

Bakugo scoffed out, trust issues was his thing. Reaching that point where you know you need help (he hated asking, hated it all), but not trusting anyone enough to be able to do so, so understandable.

It was the worst feeling.

"Fuckin' sucks." He whispered. He was just speaking to himself, considering standing.

Katsuki felt on numerous occasions that he should go to see a psychologist. But did he resort to that help? No. He was too prideful. He didn't want anyone around him to know. He didn't want to be looked upon as this broken thing that needed to be put back together, he didn't want the sympathy, nor the attention that would cause.

So, like a cracked pieces of glass, he kept putting layers of tape over the chasms to hold it together. But once a piece cracked, even after a fix, the window, it'd never be the same, removing it out and putting in a new pane, practically impossible.

Bakugo knew he was stuck just living his life, without an escape. "Jus'like you hn?" He sneered.

Kasaya was stuck living with some huge shithole problems, whatever they were. It was obvious. Clear.

Bakugo felt something in his gut swirl, they were kind of the same.

'...?' He had no words to that new deduction. He just moved his mind away from it, fast.

Wholly, Bakugo didn't think that his roommate was 'bad'. He'd seen him in such a light tonight earlier on the couch lounger at the restaurant patio that it was relaxing sitting around with him, not really talking about anything, doing absolutely nothing important, having a smoke, some drinks.

Bakugo understood why his father had enjoyed tobacco now.

He himself was unsure of it, had gave Saya a shrug back on his simple, plain, uncaring question. He'd even let the fool question him some! A gift he never let anyone get away with! But, it was Kasaya that made the room's atmosphere that they lived in so peaceful! It was that uncaring nature that he shed off!

That he already openly admitted to himself, that he knew, that he accepted, because that is the truth. Kasaya was peaceful aura, like an aroma of soothing incense. And that, Bakugo wasn't willing to let end so easily, and that was selfish, and Bakugo knew it. This new version of Kasaya, threatened Bakugo's environment and that made him NOT HAPPY.

They didn't really know each other, Bakugo had no idea who the younger Satoko really was, but he at least had been around him enough to understand his ambience was not evil. The long-haired guy, suddenly a monster, a horrible creature, bi-polar, at the turn of a switch, was NOT him.

Bakugo chuckled though, at his greed, but also because yet again, Kasaya was like himself, like how so many people described Bakugo Katsuki to others: Bi-Polar.

His head popping itup again, to be not ignored: The similarities he was beginning to find! 'Fuck!'

That was why he was laughing in the elevator at the restaurant. He'd overheard those damn people at that table! Cuffs. Muzzle.

'You bet! Assholes!' They had no clue what was going on in his head at that tournament, how shitty he felt for simply being handed that medal and not actually earning it, all they were just spectators.

Like all the rich, silk-suited twits tonight clapping at the berserk turn of events.

Everyone was just so stupid! Why couldn't people just understand?

At that moment a car headlight suddenly appeared over the ridge and was approaching. He looked. A limo.

"Well shit." Bakugo mumbled. He bet knew who it was.

The black long car pulled up, and stopped right in front of him, the side door opened. Sure enough. Hisashi swung his legs out, dressed back into half a uniform.

Bakugo and him just stared at each other.

"What?" Bakugo got up the balls to spit it out to the soldier.

"Need a ride?"

"Fine." Katsuki stood then, off balance, slapping more dirt off his pants, but not caring much. He didn't actually want to accept the ride, but he wasn't confident that he'd wouldn't be able to get back on his own. He'd actually been contemplating walking back to the Grand Suites and waiting on the Satokos.

The limo really was perfect and not perfect in timing with what he'd been mulling around with in his head. He didn't want to think anymore about how him and Kasaya were akin.

He got in, noticing immediately that Kasaya was dressed back in his black tank, uniform pants, and shoes, but he was asleep, or passed out rather, laying length wise on one of the long bench seats inside, his lids closed, a blanket semi tossed over him. A huge amount of gauze was on his shoulder, taped down perfectly. The medic had done a decent job.

"Hey I…"

"Don't talk t'me!" Bakugo snapped at the soldier, red eyes furious. What and idiot! Trying to already start smoothing the situation over! Did he understand that he was almost the cause of his own death! Somehow, Bakugo knew that Hisashi understood that, especially as a man of uniform.

The car began to move after the door shut.

He just kept focusing at Kasaya, he looked worthless lying there like that, all shattered to pieces on the inside after what he almost did, he assumed, appendages slack like he was a damaged toy.

The older honored it. The ride was silent for some time. Completely dark in the inside of the thing, no interior lights on.

But Hisashi noticed something, he couldn't help it: The roommate kept inspecting, eyeing his younger brother.

There still might be hope. Hisashi felt that he'd ruined it though. Any chance that his brother had at a friend, he'd possibly destroyed. How he could be so concerned for his younger brother still, more so than his own life that he just almost lost, was hard even for himself to fathom, because impossibly deep was his brotherly love for him.

What occured was a HUGE accident on his part, cutting his younger brother, slashing him only a tiny bit, not deep even, or long, but it was enough to wake a sleeping giant: the mind, Diasuta, that had been controlled for so long by another person (still was without the drink numbing that LOVE emotion), by a will not of Kasaya's own, that if it's deepest parts awakened, would trigger and run rampant. A piranha.

Truly the phrase 'like it has a mind of its own' was Kasaya's brain. It was a mind of its own.

Because Kasaya had no control.

Sure, Kasaya could call on the name Diasuta for his Level 2 and 3, but it would just control him instead. Diasuta was too powerful, and with Kasaya having no will what so ever to use it, he was powerless to it.

The form he knew as his brother; the conscious side was Kasaya, the subconscious was all ruled by King Diasuta.

Ashley had wrecked his subconscious up so bad. Fucked it up hard.

His younger brother's brain, it was something he couldn't grasp. He had no idea how to help. His quirk was nothing but a simple one, how his younger brother got born with so much power was unbelievable to him. He just took it as luck of the draw really.

But even after that major upset, Hisashi could tell as he watched Bakugo, that his eyes would look everywhere, then they'd slowly start to trail back over to Kasaya, then back off, then back over. Like he kept checking in on him. The military student seen what he felt was 'concern' on the blonde's face. Or maybe it was confusion? His younger brother's roommate's eyebrows seemed like they were questioning.

And suddenly a voice spoke: "There better not be a problem!" It was a shout, but it was lowered. Huffed. Obviously slightly quiet in lue of a sleeping person. "I WILL NOT live…" It was choosing its words, and got more hushed. "With a fuckin'..."

Hisashi cleared his throat. "He's fine." He cut him off, he wouldn't allow someone to label or even speak of his brother as exactly what that Bakugo was getting ready to say!

"I DIDN'T ASK IF HE WAS FINE! I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!" Suddenly Bakugo was arguing. He was first most concerned about his own well-being. But did he care… about the other? His head turned at that to look out the window instead of at a sleeping body.

He cared because Kasaya made the room nice that was all! He didn't want that somehow ruined by all this garbage. He looked back over. 'Surely.' Bakugo's skimmed him down. Surely. He was okay though.

"There are complications."

"NO SHIT." Bakugo yelled as quiet as possible. (Bakugo yelling quietly was actually quite difficult for him.)

"Look. I want what I said to you earlier to still stand." Hisashi pushed. It might of been a positive thing at least in one respect that he's accidentally cut him. Now Hisashi knew, Kasaya was failing miserably at figuring out how to control himself, his brain, which pretty much meant his life was not getting any better, and that he was just as messed up as he always had been.

It struck utter fear in Hisashi, a fear that he welcomed. Because he would rather know that he was failing, and be afraid and worried, than for Kasaya (like always) to not say a damn thing to him, to one day snap and fall off the deep end.

"I don't owe you shit after tonight!" The voice grumbled, cracked, a rude tongue click.

"If you don't want people getting hurt then you'll give it a listen." Hisashi was on edge. He was back on this. Had to be! Diasuta had triggered so easily. He hated that he had to ask a bit of this on someone else.

Kasaya was Hisashi's responsibility.

Bakugo let a strong puff of air right out of his nose. How shitty! As a Hero Class participant, it was his job to prick ears up at the fact that people could/might get hurt or die. He felt trapped in this! What utter bullshit!

"What!?" He irritably rambled. For some reason he wasn't as mad at the older brother either, not as much as he had gotten at four-eyed Iida, or at other random people, which was also surprising. He had been lightly entertaining before that perhaps the solider wasn't as formal as he put on. Now he really knew, he wasn't.

He was watching him with his mask off now.

And Bakugo would rather like to just see people with their masks off, than having them up front lying to him about who they were, like so many other farm animal commoners that surrounded him. Bakugo was honest with who he was, why couldn't any other assholes be like that? All sugar-coating shit, and making themselves seem cool and great, but actually incredibly ugly on the inside.

People consistently are liars.

"I live on the military base, and I can't watch him."

"He's not MY FUCKIN' responsibility!"

"I know." Hisashi didn't shout back. "He's mine." Hisashi scanned his brother, then to Bakugo who looked away, not meeting eyes, the blonde now showing utter disrespect towards him. "If he does anything odd, don't do anything, just tell me."

"What?" Bakugo learched his eyes over.

"Here's my number." He tossed his phone over, and it landed on Bakugo's lap, precise.

Bakugo pulled his phone out of his dress pant pocket. "Just so were clear fucker." He looked at Hisashi. The formalities were completely out of the basket now. He did not care if the man was Kasaya's brother, did not care if he was a soldier, and did not care if he was decorated.

Hisashi actually smirked at the total flippancy. It didn't boil his blood; instead it reminded him of his filthy mouthed comrades at the base.

"I don't speak for him." His words laced with a deep growl, theatening. "It's my duty to serve. I'm Hero Class at UA. Y'got that dip shit?" Swells of pride formed in his voice. He was #1! He'd be the pride of the school!

Hisashi nodded.

"The only reason I'm fuckin' lettin' this shit slide is because of my eventual job! Other than that, your ass would be laid out!" He started punching Hisashi's number into his phone. "Don't you fuckin' dare think of using me either, or I'll fuckin' kill you and actually follow through!"

Hisashi crossed his arms, he betted on that. It sounded like an empty threat. Bakugo was powerful, and an asshole, as he'd heard from his brother via texts. He was seeing that full force now, for sure. He'd get along swimmingly with the others on base, easily. Hisashi couldn't help thinking that way, he had an uncanny ability to be positive, especially when Kasaya never was.

The phone landed back into the lounge seat he was sitting on, it had been rashly tossed.

"That sense of 'serving', you and I have in common." That duty to his countrymen, that attitude like a drill sergeant. Bakugo again, would make a good soldier. A strong, able one, Hisashi thought.

"Shut up asshole! We are NOT alike. Don't involve me in anything else!"

"No, we really aren't alike." Hisashi. They weren't. They really weren't personally. He'd sacrifice it all for Kasaya. Bakugo only cared if something was in it for him.

Some more time passed in silence. And Bakugo couldn't keep his mind from running all over the damn place. Mainly he kept thinking about what he'd figured out so far. He was painting not just blue, but red on the portrait now. Two opposing and very different colors. Kasaya a paint bucket of screwed up.

Selfishly Bakugo needed. "What's his problem anyway?" Suki suddenly barked out. This older was prone to chat, unlike the other. If he wanted then... why not use the one that would at least open his mouth?

Bakugo said loud and perfectly clear he wouldn't be used. But he wasn't against using the soldier on the other hand, for an information grill.

Hisashi was falling asleep, that stirred him inside the moving limo. He yawned. "He probably won't tell you. I know Kasaya doesn't talk a lot."

"Im not fuckin' askin' him, I'm asking you."

"What does it matter hm?" Hisashi rubbed his eyes. "You'one of 'em or not?"

"One of who? The fuck are you talkin' about? I'm concerned about being stabbed in my sleep asshole."

'Oh.' Hisashi got it. So, yes, he was just concerned about himself and that was it. Maybe he was wrong on thinking he gave even a slight bit of a damn. Bakugo was selfish truly, but he understood one had to be concerned for himself. He shared a room with him. Therefore, Hisashi, couldn't be mad, but he was slightly hurt. He didn't know why he's allowed his mind to think so softly, that Bakugo cared or was concerned in regards to his brother.

"Never mind." The soldier's head lulled to the side and swallowed. "Saya's had a rough past. Screwed him up."

"Hn." He remembered hearing him cussing that witch out on the phone, what a victory! No shit! If that was a part of it, hell he'd won there. He gave him that.

"He won't hurt anyone, as long as he doesn't get hurt physically. You don't wanna wake shit up on accident like I did." His speech was flat, he was hurt for his brother, at himself for thinking what he'd been thinking previously. Tt was like he felt all the feelings that Kasaya never felt.

"Wake up what?" Bakugo pushed, voice dark, red eyes blazing in the blackness of the limo.

"His mind."

"Hah?"

"His brain." He got down to a whisper, and he came over to sit by Bakugo. "The subconscious."

Bakugo groaned from not having space now.

"You asked for your personal safety, I understand that." Hisashi really did. He'd almost died back there, that was not a joke. "I'll fill you in on a few things, but as far as anything personal, that's not my place."

"Good." Bakugo huffed. "Because I don't wanna hear that shit."