Hey folks! Girl meets girl – for both the first and the millionth time. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 7 – Second first, first Second

With Théa's help, it took Bo only two weeks to travel to Ithaka, where she inconspicuously used her powers of persuasion on all the right people to get her registered in the middle of the semester, and snatch a job in a small café near campus. The logistics had kept her busy and up until now, she hadn't even seen Lauren, but now that she was settled in a comfortable apartment in the vicinity of both her new workplace and the university, she was good to go.

At least rationally.

But the truth was, she was scared. Terrified, really. The euphoria of being back in a time, where her beloved wife was alive, had by now subsided and made way for fear and doubt…

How was she supposed to, just like that, make Lauren fall in love with her again – and without using her powers, because that would give away, what she was? What if she did something stupid, because she already was in love with her? After all, people did weird things all the time when they were in love, right? How in the world was she supposed to hide that from Lauren? How was she supposed to hide from the love of her life, that she knew her better than anyone ever had… possibly with the exception of Théa?

Lauren's mother did her best to encourage Bo, but the succubus couldn't shake the fear of saying something wrong during their first meeting and screwing everything up forever. She knew how irrational that was – it sounded stupid even in her own head.

But the bad feeling wouldn't go away.

On the bright side, at least her hunger wasn't an issue. Right after her arrival and the incident with Henry, she'd been worried that her younger body would make her somehow fall back into old habits. But to her delight, her control never once slipped, which proved that Théa's previous assessment of Bo's mind being way stronger than her body had been true.

Consequentially, since her arrival, Bo had made it a habit of feeding from random people in passing. She would seek out secluded corners, "accidentally" touch someone's hand to give them a quick thralling pulse, drag some chi from them and instantly make them forget what had transpired. Sometimes, she even went succu-Queen and sucked the chi from several people at once… which was convenient, but also harder to cover up with thralls. It only worked when all participants were in close proximity, so she mostly stuck to solitary individuals. It was the easiest way to satisfy her most basic hunger and she didn't want to waste her precious time here on coming up with complex feeding techniques.

Plus, the only person's chi she truly wanted was Lauren's anyway. Her Queen craved the blonde, and so did Bo. She had no choice but to suck it up and get it over with. The only question was, how.

XXX

Lauren was standing in the small apartment she shared with her roommate, inspecting herself in the mirror and pulling a comically pained face.

"Do I really have to go, Em?", she cried in a whiny voice. "You know I don't like these stupid parties. What if a bunch of gross frat boys try to touch me? I could spend tonight studying… In fact, there's this article on validation of reliable reference genes for breast cancer research I've been dying to––" She interrupted herself when she spotted her friend's expression. Emily's eyebrows were raised and her stance did not allow any protest. Lauren exhaled wearily and slumped her shoulders. "Aw, man!"

The other woman patted her on the back. "You promised you'd go to this one with me", she reminded Lauren. "Besides, I busted my arse finding a really good party even you will enjoy."

"Even I, eh? Thanks…"

"You know, what I mean." She gently slapped her shoulder. "I swear, there shall be plenty of nerds and no frat dorks whatsoever. Trust me, you'll be fine. Besides, you need this, Lo. You never go out and let off some steam. It's not right. You can't study all the time. You need something to take your mind off all that sometimes… or someone, in the shape of me."

Emily grinned, and Lauren couldn't help but mirror her expression. She was grateful that she had her roommate – after all, she could've ended up with a person she didn't click with at all. Instead, she'd scored Emily*, a bubbly young woman, whose hair was sometimes green, sometimes blue, and who – unlike Lauren – enjoyed wearing extremely colourful clothing. On top of all that, she was crazy smart – just like Lauren, who was currently pursuing a degree in biomedical engineering on top of the medical degree she'd finished last year.

Emily was a tech nerd and their apartment was filled to the brim with the gimmicks and gadgets she was currently tinkering with. Lauren didn't mind the mess too much, so long as the girl kept her stuff out of her room, which was her holy sanctuary. Ever since Emily, an undergrad student, had moved in with Lauren, the two of them had shared a silent agreement that study time was not to be interrupted. And while her earlier statement may have seemed like the opposite, but Emily was just as eager to study and learn as Lauren. Only that she somehow managed to have some fun on the side – a trait that, in all honesty, the blonde was a little envious of.

"You're right", she sighed, finally giving in. "It might not seem that way sometimes, but I am grateful that you drag me out every now and then. So… thank you."

Emily's grin widened. "You're very welcome. Now, c'mon, you look great. Let's go."

Smiling, Lauren took the offered hand and let her friend drag her away. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. And even if it was, there was always that article she could look forward to reading later tonight…

XXX

Bo was pacing back and forth in her apartment, huffing and puffing. She was nervous. So nervous. Tonight was the night. She'd made all the plans and taken all the precautions, but no matter how much she fought it, the crippling fear of doing something wrong remained. Eventually, it had become so bad that she and Théa had argued about it.

Actually, no, that wasn't entirely true. Bo had argued. Théa had been her ever-gentle, ever-constructive, ever-infuriating self.

And ever-correct. Which was why, in the end, Bo had relented. Her state would likely not improve, if she left it any longer, plus, there was this pretty persistent side of her, who yearned to see Lauren again. Bo's Queen positively demanded to get to her soulmate at this point, and that was something the brunette had to be careful with. After all, she didn't want to go full succubus mode as soon as she saw her. Because if that happened, she'd give away what she was at the first chance, and she definitely wanted to avoid having to thrall Lauren like she'd done the very first time they'd met 12 years ago… or… in six years. Bo sighed. Man, time travel was confusing.

At least, she was alone for once. Théa had retreated to her own place – wherever that was, the succubus had no clue – and left Bo to get ready. Over the last weeks, they'd spent so much time together that it was good for the both of them to get some space.

Taking a deep breath, Bo abruptly stopped pacing and positioned herself in front of the full-body mirror hanging in her bedroom. She'd gone through a lot of effort searching for this outfit… the very one she'd worn the first time she'd met Lauren in their old timeline. Well, not the very one, of course, but one that came close, nonetheless. She wanted to do this right, after all, and restarting at the original beginning seemed like a good idea.

Over the past few days, she'd spent most of her free-time scanning the parameters of campus and town, scouting out places to conveniently feed, and finding out, where Lauren lived. Due to her immense fear of screwing up the second she saw her, she'd avoided the blonde at all cost. But with the help of her PI skills, she'd found out that Lauren had a roommate, who she was close friends with, and who'd managed to convince her to go to a party tonight.

The very party, where Bo planned to see Lauren again for the first time since her demise. It was eight o'clock already and she knew she should leave soon. If only she wasn't so damn jittery. Wiping her sweaty hands on her pants for the hundredth time, she took a deep breath and exhaled again.

"You can do this", she told her reflection. "You can do this, you can do this, you can do this."

She tried for a confident smile and let her eyes flash blue for a second. There. That was so much better. Of course she could do this. She was the goddamn Dark Queen – there was nothing she couldn't do. She'd travelled through time, for crying out loud! And why? To see the love of her life again. Whom she'd thought lost forever. This was the chance of a lifetime, and she would not screw it up! She straightened her jacket and gave herself another once-over. Then, she grabbed her keys and left the apartment.

Ithaca was a small town, mostly inhabited by university students, so she didn't have to walk far from her place to the party location. It was a medium-sized hall on campus – one of many, built and equipped for the purpose of entertaining the many young people living here. All kinds of events were held here, and tonight, the room was occupied by a party hosted by the local math club.

Bo could only hope she wouldn't stand out like a sore thumb in the midst of all the nerds… her outfit was sexy, but not too sexy, she thought. Entering the place though, she quickly realised that her worries had been unnecessary. Not a single person was giving her any attention whatsoever – it was almost offensive, how little these people cared about a fricking real-life succubus breaching their realm. All her life, she was so used to turning all kinds of heads whenever she stepped into any room that for a hot minute, she was gobsmacked at the blatant display of nerd ignorance. Until she reminded herself, why she was here and that this was actually to her benefit.

Keeping her head low, she looked around the room. She was sure Lauren must be here, as about an hour ago, she'd intercepted a text message, in which the blonde's roommate had informed a mutual friend of their departure. Bo hated violating their privacy like that, but it had been the most convenient way to quickly identify a good place for her second first encounter with Lauren.

Bo forced herself to look calm to not raise any suspicion, but her heart was racing. The more time passed, the more nervous she got. She'd walked around and scanned the room twice by now, but there was no Lauren. She was about to throw in the towel and postpone this to a later date, when she spotted an inconspicuous door hidden behind a half-closed curtain that had escaped her attention before.

"Aha!", she hummed under her breath and headed for the adjoining room.

Passing through the door, she quickly took in her surroundings. This room was smaller and darker than the first one, which gave it a cosier atmosphere. The music coming from the speakers was a different style and not as loud as next door, and there were a lot more people here, by comparison. Only a few of them were dancing though – instead, they were huddled together in small clusters, engaged in animated conversations and heated discussions. Some people were standing very close together, talking more quietly, while others were excitedly waving around their arms to get their point across.

Bo smirked. Oh yes, this definitely looked like a place, where Lauren would have fun. Keeping a low profile like before, she walked from group to group, stopping for a while to scan the place from all angles and then hurrying along, before someone could ask her to solve a complex math problem or something. She didn't want to disappoint anyone, after all. Losing herself in thoughts of a weird yet funny scenario, where she'd cause a ruckus because someone exposed her as a non-nerd, her eyes drifted through the room on autopilot… when suddenly, it happened.

She saw her face. And she saw her eyes. And she died. And she was reborn.**

"Lauren…", she breathed. She couldn't stop herself. It was as if all life had drained from her at once, only to be replaced with new air, new soul, new… everything. Her arms were uselessly hanging at her sides, and she lost control of her face. Completely unaware of the world around her, she gawked at the blonde like she was the first human being she'd ever seen. And the most beautiful. Because she was.

This was Lauren. Really Lauren. Her Lauren. The blonde was fully focused on a conversation with her friend with the colourful hair, which was a good thing, because Bo couldn't divert her eyes. She stared at her, drinking in this image of utter perfection in front of her, an indescribable feeling of elation taking possession of her heart, washing over her like a tsunami. She felt like falling and unthinkingly held onto a table standing next to her, never deflecting her gaze. She just… Couldn't. Look. Away.

Lauren was wearing washed-out blue jeans and a white button-down shirt, and her blonde mane was bound in a ponytail. Her hair was longer and a lighter shade than Bo had ever seen on her, and she was even slimmer than when they'd first met. Her face was so young… different, yet the same.

She was everything. Still, and again, everything.

Bo felt like running to her, falling into her arms, holding her close and never letting go ever again. Her heart leapt in her chest, butterflies erupted in her stomach, and she was overcome by the familiar fierce desire to protect her.

She was about to throw all caution to the wind and start walking, her body urging her towards the blonde, as if it had a life of its own, when out of the blue, the doctor looked directly at her.

XXX

Lauren was having a great time, and nobody was more surprised about it than her. She and Emily had arrived about an hour ago, met up with some people from their courses, got some drinks from the makeshift bar and retreated to this secondary room, which, according to the others, was a lot more fun than the larger one. Lauren agreed. They'd talked and laughed and enjoyed their drinks, and no "gross frat boys" were to be seen anywhere. The blonde wished all parties could be like this, where nobody tried to touch her or enter her personal space at all, for that matter. And where nobody pressed her to consume loads of alcohol. She didn't despise the stuff, but she never drank a lot. She just didn't like being drunk, because she hated being out of control. Besides, there were so much better – and cheaper – ways to have fun, and none of them benefitted from massive hangovers or temporarily forgetting her own bloody name.

For example, reading that interesting article she'd mentioned to Emily before they'd left the apartment. Or listening to her friend's excited explanations of her latest invention, like she was doing right now. The young woman was in the middle of debating out loud, which type of resistor would fit best for her newest gimmick, when something caught Lauren's eye.

Or rather, someone. A woman, who was standing at the other end of the room.

Under normal circumstances, Lauren wouldn't have given any stranger a second glance, but she could've sworn that for a moment, the woman's dark eyes had flashed a bright blue. A reflection, surely… right? The room was dim and filled with all kinds of colourful flashing lights, so it must've been a weird optical illusion.

Though it had looked pretty real. The scientist in her was intrigued, to put it mildly. But there was something else besides that. The second Lauren spotted the blue hue, the other woman seemed startled, lowering her gaze, like she'd been caught doing something forbidden. And then, she ran off without giving her another look.

It wasn't like Lauren to lose focus, but this stranger had her stunned for a second. And not just because of her weird behaviour – she'd clearly been staring at Lauren when the blonde had caught her eye… and nobody did that, ever. Especially not someone like her. Someone so…

"Hey! Earth to Lo!", Emily called out, ripping Lauren from her thoughts.

"Hm, what?", she replied, focusing back on her friend.

"I was just telling you about my conductor plate dilemma, when you zoned out. What's going on?"

"I saw someone…" Lauren's voice sounded like her mind was somewhere far away.

"Oh, really? Who? Someone we know?", Emily replied, curiously turning around, straining her neck to check who Lauren was talking about.

"No, I… maybe? I only got a quick glance. She looked at me, and then she left." She paused, a little confused at her own reaction to this stranger. "She was… beautiful."

Emily smirked knowingly. "Ohhh, I see", she drawled. "Well then, what are you waiting for? Go after her."

Lauren bit her lip. Emily could tell she felt bad about abandoning her, but in all honesty, she couldn't remember ever seeing Lauren this flustered about another human being. It would be good for her to meet someone, who had the potential of being more than just friends. Besides, she was curious, who'd managed to lure her friend from her shell with just a look, so, with a dismissive gesture, she stepped aside, giving Lauren space to move past.

"I'm a big girl, Lo", she said. "Drop me a text, if you need to find me later. Go, get your mysterious Cinderella."

Lauren flashed her an ironic grin, but didn't resist, when she gave her an encouraging push.

"Remember to drop her off before midnight though, and see if you find a glass shoe!", the young woman called after her, making Lauren snort, before she disappeared in the crowd.

XXX

Bo could've kicked herself. All these weeks of careful preparation, all the painful postponing and the waiting… ruined by one moment of complete loss of control? It'd been a while, but she felt like she needed to have a serious chat with her inner Queen. How on earth could she have been so careless, when there was so much at stake?

She inhaled deeply, trying to calm her nerves. No, this couldn't be it. It was just a glitch, nothing to worry about. She needed to get her shit together and try again. Besides, who knew if Lauren had even seen her eyes shift? This place wasn't exactly brightly lit, and lights were flashing constantly. Plus, Bo had lowered her gaze and run off as soon as she'd noticed, so maybe…

She straightened her back, about to go look for the blonde, hoping that her weird demeanour hadn't totally creeped her out, when she felt a tentative touch of fingertips on her shoulder. She didn't need to turn around to know that it was Lauren; her Queen could sense her, and once again, the impressions raining down on her robbed her of all thought.

She just stood there, gobsmacked, staring at her beautiful wife, who didn't know her anymore… yet.

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Unaware of the stranger's inner turmoil, Lauren gave her a hesitant smile. She didn't know, what to make of the other woman's behaviour, who looked like she'd seen a ghost. But for some reason, Lauren felt drawn to her. Which scared her a little. Or more like, a lot… She had no idea, who this person was, after all, and Lauren had a past. A terrible, shameful past full of pain and remorse, that could catch up with her at any moment. Over the years, she'd tried her best to push it all away and not think about it anymore – one of the two main reasons, why she'd never told a single soul. The other reason was to protect herself and her friends. The fewer people knew about her part in the death of those innocent people, the better.

Back when the tragedy had happened, she hadn't thought twice about leaving it all behind. And she didn't regret running away anymore… at least not often. But that didn't change the fact that she had to be careful. And seeking out weirdly-behaving strangers at a random party was not being careful. But there was something about this beautiful brunette. Maybe it was time to take a leap of faith and, if necessary, face the consequences. Maybe she was tired of running. Plus, if this was a mistake, it certainly didn't feel like one. Lauren was a scientist through and through, and when it came to her studies and research, she rarely went with her gut. But here, it felt like the right thing to do. So, without thinking about it much more, she cautiously reached out her hand.

"Hi, um… I know this is going to sound corny, but have we met before?", she asked.

Bo swallowed. Her entire concentration was split between stopping herself from kissing Lauren's lips, which were dangerously close to her own, and desperately trying to keep her Queen in check and her eyes from shifting. She was incapable of answering, so instead, she just stared at her wide-eyed.

Lauren awkwardly lowered her hand, her forehead creased in a frown. At this point, she was pretty sure that the other woman wasn't a government employee, sent here to throw her into jail, but she was acting so strangely that she was beginning to wonder, whether she'd made the right decision following her, or if she'd just offered her hand to a crazy person.

"Sorry, never mind", she said.

Lauren turned around, and time seemed to slow down. Just a second ago, Bo had observed her wife's beautiful features, trying to re-engrave them in her brain, when suddenly, they were gone again. Watching the blonde's face disappear from her field of view snapped Bo out of her stunned state. In a flash, she reached out to grab her wrist.

"No, wait", she said in an almost panicked tone, and Lauren turned back around. To Bo's immense relief, she didn't look appalled… just profoundly confused.

"I'm sorry, I was… never mind", she said, shaking her head, inwardly chuckling at her own speechlessness. "Bo… I'm Bo", she added, and, because she clearly didn't remember how to form full sentences anymore, opted for the easy way out and gave Lauren a smile.

Instantly, the blonde was enthralled. The awkwardness from before dissipated, and once more, she felt like she knew this woman somehow.

"Lauren", she answered with a smile of her own, her eyes repeatedly flickering to the other woman's lips.

Bo took a deep, calming breath and let go of the blonde's wrist. Then, she raised her hand to reach out to Lauren.

"Can we start again, please?", she asked with a shy smile. "Hi, my name is Bo Dennis. It's very nice to meet you."

Lauren beamed at her. "Hi, I'm Lauren Lewis, and the pleasure is all mine." She took her hand and shook it slowly.

Her gentle touch stunned Bo into silence once more. It took all her might to refrain herself from pulsing Lauren. Basking in the feeling of the blonde's warm skin against hers, she found herself lost in those dark amber eyes. Her smile widened, and a little sigh escaped her mouth, as she finally grasped the miracle of Lauren coming back to life… in a manner of speaking.

Lauren, in turn, had her own confusion to deal with. She'd been reluctant to let go of the beautiful brunette's hand anyway, and now that she caught her gaze, she wasn't sure she could. This was beyond weird. Bo was looking at her with such intensity that Lauren should have heard all kinds of alarm bells go off. She should have felt the urge to run and never look back. After her escape from her previous life, fleeing from even the slightest indication of danger had become second nature to her. But this stranger's eyes were so full of open kindness, such disarming veracity, that Lauren stayed rooted on the spot.

However, despite her amazement at Bo's demeanour – or was it because of it? – she was the first to regain her voice. Maybe it was the ever-curious scientist within her, who desperately wanted to get to the bottom of what was happening. She'd come to this random party expecting to have a good time with her friends, talking about nerdy stuff and maybe even dance a little if she felt like it. But suddenly, the evening had taken a turn somehow. She didn't even know this woman, but there was something… there.

"Should we go back out?", she asked, pointing behind her, a slight frown on her face, that gave away her continued astonishment.

For about the hundredth time tonight, Bo had to free herself of the spell Lauren had put on her. She felt like she was waking up from a trance. Blinking a few times, she focused her eyes downwards, examining their still-adjoined hands with fascination, and swallowed hard, before letting go. The sudden lack of contact was a blessing for her foggy mind, because it gave her the chance of forming words again. But at the same time, she missed it the second it was gone.

"Right. Good idea", she answered and followed the blonde into the crowded room, where Lauren stopped at a free-standing high table.

"So, Bo…", she began, leaning forward slightly to prop her forearms on the white tablecloth. "What are you doing here in Ithaca? I've never seen you in any of my courses."

Bo took a deep breath, grateful that she could always rely on Lauren's curiosity, as it took her mind off the shameful blackouts from moments ago. The immediate shock of seeing her dead lover miraculously coming back to life was slowly waning. Which was a relief, because it gave her the presence of mind to slip back into her usual, more confident self.

"That's because I'm probably not in any of them", she replied with a smirk. Lauren raised her eyebrows, and Bo laughed. "My Major's Communication. I'm usually over at Mann."

"Oh", Lauren said, surprised. Mann Library was where the Arts and Science Department was located. Interesting. And so was the change in the other woman's demeanour. All of a sudden, Bo seemed more relaxed… poised, even. But the warm, open sparkle in her eyes was still there. Which made her even more beautiful.

Lauren cleared her throat. "Then what are you doing here at this ultra-nerdy party?", she joked to distract herself from any inappropriate thoughts. She may have made the decision to make an exception for Bo and let her caution slip a little, but that didn't mean she had to jump into a sexual adventure with this woman without second thought – no matter how attractive she found her. It simply wasn't her style.

Bo sensed her caution, and she didn't blame her for it. She'd never learned much about Lauren's past, because they'd never really talked about it in their time. All Bo had ever managed to coax from her wife was that she and her brother had been environmentalists and political activists in their youth, and that one of their protests had gone terribly wrong. It had been an accident, and Lauren hadn't even been present at the time, but she'd been the one who'd built the pipe bombs that were supposed to go off in an unpopulated area with the aim of destroying an unfinished oil pipeline to stall a government project that, in the long run, would have annihilated most of the area's wildlife.

Unfortunately, the building site hadn't been abandoned at all, and eleven innocent workers had lost their lives. It was a tragedy, and listening to her wife talk about it as tears of guilt streamed down her face had broken Bo's heart. Up until that point, she hadn't thought anybody could really grasp what she herself had gone through, running all her life, leaving a trail of dead bodies behind, but hearing Lauren's story had changed that. In a strange way, it had caused Bo to feel even more connected to her than before.

But right here, right now, things were very different, because at this point in time, Lauren was still a fugitive. And as shitty as the fae had treated the doctor all her life, working for the Ash had no doubt protected her from potential human prosecutors.

"I saw a posting on the bulletin board in the café, where I work in between courses and studying", she answered and then leaned closer, lowering her voice, like she was about to tell Lauren a secret. "Frankly, our parties are always the same and kind of boring. So, I thought I'd try a different turf." In reality, Bo had no clue, what her department's parties were like. She'd attended only a handful since arriving and only ever for low-key feeding. She'd never stuck around, because she wanted to avoid making too many contacts in this timeline. But it seemed like she'd said the right thing, because Lauren was grinning.

"Aha!" she snickered. "So, what's your verdict? Are you happy with your little field test?", she asked with an ironic undertone, rolling her eyes at the almost palpable nerdiness wafting through the entire room.

"Very", Bo replied with a lopsided smile. For a split-second, her eyes wandered to Lauren's lips, but she quickly looked back up, hoping that the blonde hadn't noticed her greedy stare.

Of course, Lauren had noticed, but once more, she found that the other woman's gaze didn't disturb her. It was so honest and true. And every time, she looked at her, Bo's eyes seemed to sparkle, even in this dimly lit party location.

"So, um…", Bo said, trying to steer the conversation back to safer waters. "Did you come here alone?" Of course, she already knew the answer, but it was the first thing that came to mind.

"No, I didn't." Lauren smiled again. "My friends are right over there, actually." She pointed to another table across the room. "But…"

Bo looked back at her. "But…?"

"I don't think I want to go back yet. We could… talk for a bit?" Suddenly, she was hesitant. Her own clumsy attempt to keep Bo to herself for just a little longer surprised her. She could only hope that the brunette didn't take her for the desperate type.

"I'd love that", she replied, and Lauren visibly relaxed.

After that, conversation flowed easily, their previous awkwardness quickly gone and forgotten. They talked and talked, and time flew by. Bo carefully avoided asking Lauren about her past and family, and the blonde unwittingly did the same for Bo. Which the succubus was equally grateful for, because it spared her the pain of possibly having to lie to her about who and what she was.

But even though they danced around the more sensitive topics, Bo learned a lot about her wife – things she didn't know beforehand. For example, that Lauren had already finished her medical degree at another university last year and had come to Ithaca to add a second because she "felt like it". Her major here was biomedical engineering, and although Bo was well aware that her wife was a certified genius, her intellect and passion for medicine continued to floor her.

They never ended up re-joining Lauren's friends at the opposite end of the room. About an hour ago, Emily had sent her a text informing her that she was leaving and telling her to "better have some fun ;)". Lauren had smiled at the message and put her phone away to go back to chatting with her new acquaintance. It was easy to talk to Bo, and sometimes, she found herself zoning out, just listening to her voice and looking at her exceptionally beautiful smile. Whenever Bo showed her enchanting dimples, Lauren couldn't help but smile back, and by the end of the night, she was sure that she wanted to see her again.

All night, she'd analysed back and forth in her head, weighing up the pros and cons and thinking through all kinds of possible scenarios from best to worst. But she'd always ended up with the same result. No matter how much danger she was potentially putting herself into, she had this feeling deep in her gut that it was the right thing to do. Besides, the more she'd see Bo, the better she'd get to know her, and in her opinion, that was a massive pro.

Still, she'd only just met her. So, after Bo had gallantly dropped her off at her dorm, she kept her distance, even though she really wanted to kiss her goodbye – if even on the cheek. Instead, she pulled herself together, reminding herself of her own fugitive status once more, and gave her a friendly hug, making it clear that she wanted to go slow. Which, to her relief, Bo seemed to understand.

Side by side and chatting away, they'd walked the short distance from the party location back to Lauren's apartment. The entire time, Bo was hoping that the blonde didn't sense her inner turmoil. Over the course of the evening, she'd watched her aura spike and drop over and over again like a rollercoaster, which had made the constant urge to touch her incredibly hard to resist. Honestly, she'd only been able to suppress her succubus, because she was scared shitless.

The shock over her repeated loss of self-control earlier on was still fresh, and she'd been beyond relieved, when the blonde didn't make an effort to try and kiss her goodbye. Because, while her blackouts had proven that she desperately needed to work on getting her Queen under control, they'd also reminded her of Théa's rule number three: No telling Lauren about the fae, in order to not change the future any more than she already had. She did understand Théa's reasoning, but also feared that this part in particular would be harder to master than all the other rules.

Bo sighed, lost in thought as she walked back to her apartment alone, hands buried in the pockets of her leather jacket. How on earth was she going to keep this a secret? Her Queen was so powerful that she physically felt her desire. She demanded of Bo to reunite with her believed-to-be-lost partner. And honestly, Bo agreed – which didn't exactly facilitate her situation.

With a frustrated huff, she kicked a pebble off the sidewalk and thought of the future – their old future, before her wife's untimely death. From the moment she'd entered her life, Bo had felt a connection to the human doctor. Right from the start, she knew she was special, and even though they'd both made mistakes, they'd pulled through in the end. They'd worked on their relationship, ploughed through their issues and fears, and stood side by side for better or worse. And it had all started on that fateful day, when they'd sat on the hood of the Camaro, and Lauren had suggested they give it another try.

Dagny had just been born, Tamsin had died in the process, and Kenzi had left for what would turn out to be years. And even though they'd finally managed to banish Hades to Tartarus, the path of resistance had been painful and long. Bo had lost both Trick and Aife… and Hale. And all that because of a handful of self-absorbed uber-creatures and their never-ending petty power games.

Stupid fae. Stupid, stupid… Oh…

Bo stopped dead in her tracks, holding onto a random lamp post. Out of nowhere, she felt dizzy, when the sudden realisation of a terrible truth overcame her – a fact that, up until a second ago, she'd never faced… because it was too painful: Everything bad that had ever happened to Lauren, had happened because of the fae. It had started back when the Ash betrayed her by cursing Nadia and luring the genius doctor into slavery. And it had ended with the deaths of almost everyone Bo – and Lauren – had ever cared about. She'd never given it a second thought, because as long as the doctor had been around, they'd found comfort in each other. But now…

No matter, how much she twisted and turned it – ultimately, it had been the fae, who had ended Lauren's life.

It was them. Always them. It was all their fault… those spiteful, hateful creatures with powers greater than any living being should ever possess. And even though Bo knew deep in her heart that she was nothing like those stuck-up arseholes, it didn't change the fact, that she was fae, too. And her Queen was dangerous – that much had been clear since the day she'd killed the Lich and scared the living daylights out of Lauren and herself.

For a millisecond, Bo considered severing all ties to the doctor right this instant – turning her back, before it was too late. But that idea was discarded as quickly as it had appeared. For one, because she couldn't bear the thought of never seeing her again. But also, because staying away from her now didn't mean that Lauren would never meet the fae. In fact, the opposite was way more likely. A few months from now, she'd meet Nadia, and they'd go to the Congo, Lauren would meet the Ash, and everything would start anew. There was no way in hell Bo would let all that happen again.

Taking a deep breath, she straightened her back, her heart filled with a new, fierce resolve. She would hold true to the promise she'd given Théa and go even further… by completely shielding Lauren from the fae – all fae, forever, if necessary. She'd keep her own genus a secret, never use her powers in her presence and reconquer Lauren's heart. And then, they'd get married again and live a quiet life somewhere far, far away.

It was a solid plan… but also a painful one, Bo realised, a sudden stab of regret piercing her soul. Going through with it would mean that she'd never see Dyson again, never meet Trick or Tamsin or anyone else she'd grown to care for in her old future. The realisation made her heart ache. But it was also her heart, that ultimately gave her no choice. Because if staying away from them was what it would take to save her beloved wife's life in the long run, Bo was willing to do it. All her life since meeting Lauren, her love for the doctor had been the one ever-present constant she could always count on. It had been her love that had brought her here in the first place, and her love was what she would use to shield Lauren from any and all possible danger.

Exhaling a deep breath in a puff, she started walking with determination. For the first time since arriving in this timeline, she felt like she had a goal – something solid that she could work with. Now, she just had to figure out how.

* Whoever can tell me, which show I borrowed Emily from gets a virtual cookie ;)

** Quoted from Rachel Anton's X-Files story "Eleventh Hour". More than twenty years later, this line still deeply resonates with me. It is so harmonious and perfectly fitting for the situation. I love it, and in a way, this very line is the reason I ever started writing this story. I hope it resonates with you as well.