One shot 3

Death's point of view and his relationship with Vida, and his general pov.

Warning: Contains angst and some mentions of murder and death(nothing gory), sensitive themes, and some suggestive themes(but nothing explicit)

Death didn't exactly remember when he came into consciousness, he knew he probably existed around the same time as Vida. Just like her, he was just there with no explanation as to how or why. Lobo knew the darkness just like Vida did, he remembered it just empty with no meaning. He hated the darkness, he hated how he even had the passion to hate in the first place. Death recalled wanting to scream and beg for something, anything, to just help him. But he couldn't, he didn't have a body or voice. His mind was like a sad pile of goo, only ever capable of awareness. It was agonizing, why did he feel it? Why…WHY?!

He shouted within the world that is muted.

His words were silent, yet weeping.

His world was dark and silence was his only muse.

What did he do to deserve such torment?

That's when it happened, the darkness was no more. Everything exploded in light and beauty. It shocked him at first. It happened too quickly and ended so fast that he couldn't process it. Then there it was…the universe…

It was beautiful, and it was powerful.

Who did this? Who fabricated the universe.

That's when he sensed her

—-

She was beautiful, and she was EVERYWHERE. Oh the sounds the universe made and lights that glowed when she moved. The stars grew more powerful every time she spoke. The way she expanded the universe and constructed it into her own image. She was an anomaly that was yet to be understood by him. He was infatuated. But why did she do this? And how? He had questions, so many of them. Did she create him too? With didn't she speak to him when he was constantly trying to call someone but didn't have a voice? Why did she let him suffer?

Honestly, he was scared to ask.

Fear was not something he was familiar with at the time. Yes he felt frustration, hate, and agonizing sadness. But fear? It was not something he knew of until now. Maybe the universe triggered these new emotions to make him endure more pain. Was there any other positive emotion other than the infatuation he felt for this powerful and cosmic being? He wouldn't know, he figured that this was just how things were. It's possible that he was just meant to suffer. And was forever committed to negative emotions that will eventually drive him mad. Now, he didn't want to just fall into self pity again. That wouldn't do anything for him. Now that he was free from the darkness, he refused to just float around the universe and do nothing. He wanted to explore and discover the secrets of its individuality. This new being…she was far beyond his comprehension. How could he ever go up to her and reveal himself? He didn't even have a physical frame! Would she brush him off or ignore him? He wasn't sure if he had the mental stability to handle such rejection. He was alone already, he didn't need to feel more detached from the new world than he already did.

So he decided to stay silent and not contact her. He would watch from the corners of the universe and keep to himself. How could he introduce himself to something beyond him? He decided this would be for the best, and if he was alone now it's something that he was used to.

He would be alone for the rest of eternity.

All the vivid colors in the universe were blurring now

The blue and whites were disorienting and once again silence was his only muse.

If he had the capability to cry he would just do that right now.

—-

He slowly was losing his mind.

He felt these emotions of madness bubble up in him. The colors were blurring once again, the blue looked green and the red looked more yellow. He continued restlessly and desperately tried managing his emotions. Everytime he felt negative emotions he seen colors, its like his consciousness was fucking with him and he didn't know why. He wanted to ask her, but he always felt fear or anxiety bubble up in him. Everytime he felt fear he saw purple. Same with other negative emotions.

When he felt anxiety he saw gray.

When he felt the silence again he saw white.

When felt sadness he saw blue.

When he felt all three of these the colors blurred.
But the one emotion that always got to him and mostly felt was hatred. And when he felt hatred he saw only one color.

RED

Now Ironically, it's the same color he sees whenever he thinks about Her. It was a blurring of these emotions that weirded him out the most. One minute he desired to hear what her voice was like, craving to learn what she planned to do in the future. The next he hated her, jealous or her power, that she probably wouldn't even like him. He was so small compared to her. Why would she ever like what he was? Was he banned from beauty? Was it forbidden to be so obsessed with something beyond his grasp? Was he forever forbidden from her? It certainly felt that way.

The red was drowning him. It felt like he was only ever seeing red whenever he thought of her. He was descending into nothing but madness at this point.

Eventually he had enough, enough of his loneliness, of his self hatred. He decided to do something about it.

So he left the small corners of the universe and decided to explore the galaxies. When he did that he looked at her stars.

Those stars angered him. They existed for so long yet they did nothing but mock him. That's when he realized…

If he could not create. Could he be destroyed?

…..

He never considered it. If he was banned from feeling anything but agony then maybe this was what he was made for. This was his destiny.

His colors were blurring into more red now. From hot bright red to soft pink.

It is drowning him now, drowning his perception of thought and logic. But why try managing emotions? Why not let them express themself? If he did that he would be able to find out who he really is. Perhaps this was it, destroying everything she created. Maybe it was petty and unnecessary. But he didn't care. Why stay innocent….

The high he felt at the thought of burning all these stupid stars. It was addictive and delicious.

He would destroy everything she created.

She approached him after that. He should have known better if he was going to be honest. Of course she would notice his destruction. How foolish was he?

That's when he seen her up close

Oohh god she was beautiful. So, soo… Beautiful…

He couldn't quite describe her appearance, she was as enormous as a galaxy and almost looked like various stars. Like a huge ball of light, and it looked like a ball that glowed colors he's never seen before. She was everything he never imagined. And he was terrified.

Now that she faced him personally. He wanted nothing more than to shrivel up and hide. It's not like he was scared that she would do something to him, but rather it was more like what she would think about him. So he could only do what what he instincts were telling him

He asked her a question.

After that they both came to terms on what they are. They both decided to continue on with what they were continued to create more existence and he killed it when their time was up. He didn't regret any of it honestly, nothing at all. This is who he was. The only thing he was capable of doing. He would just have to accept it. Eventually he and her wanted new identities. Like names. He decided to name her.

"Life" he whispered to her like it was a forbidden word. Not like a curse word, but simply because it's the only name that fits her so well. The name was a light as a feather yet it felt so heavy saying it out loud. He wanted nothing more than to accept it as her name. Please…please….

"It's beautiful, I will treasure this name for as long as I exist." happiness, he felt happiness. Life. His beautiful life…

"And I will call you death!" She chipped.

Oh.

Now he felt nothing but ecstasy.

Earth was created hundreds of years ago.

Both life decided she wanted to create beings such as mortals. At first he was skeptical, why create creatures with such short life spans? But then he eventually became accustomed to the idea.
Everything was fine after that. His job was simple, after he guarded souls he left them to the afterlife. It was simple. It was fine.

Life said she wanted to look like the mortals

—-

It felt strange, having a body.

Especially one that looked like a wolf.
Now, it's not to say that he didn't like the idea of being a wolf. It's just the implications of it that was strange. Being an anthropomorphic canine meant his specific diet would be flesh. He wondered if he needed food to begin with. Death was literally an entity.

Right now he was in a grass field on earth, both life and death wanted to test these new bodies out. Their sensations felt strange but they got used to them.

Right now he sat next to Vida(her alternate name) at the edge of a lake. They both enjoyed the new sensations that the weather gave them. Like the nice cool wind that flew through his fur or the beautiful colors he saw with his new eyes.

This time they didn't blur together.

Vida spoke up in a hesitant tone which was rare. Which meant that she was about to ask him a new and unfamiliar question. It couldn't be anything that he wasn't able to answer.

"My death, do you know about love?" Okay well he wasn't expecting THAT. His red eyes widened in shock and his head twisted to hers. Love….? Death was vaguely aware of it, mortals loved each other all the time.

"I…yes, but I'm not really familiar with the subject. The mortals loved each other all the time." he mumbled. Vida giggled and grabbed his hand, he choked.

"Yeah, mortals are strange like that, holding on eachother so desperately. Not knowing that they can't hold on forever. But…"

She clenched onto his hand tightly. He gulped, feeling butterflies in his stomach. Why did he feel this way?

"While the life I gave them is very short and they will eventually die… the love they feel for each other won't." Lobo blinked, what was she getting at? It's not that they can feel love. Why should he care? They are concepts with bodies and could never feel such a thing.
She continued,
"And…Doesn't that make love immortal in itself?"

He was speechless, well…she wasn't wrong. Finally he spoke, his voice trembling for reasons he did not understand.

"W-why are you telling me this?" Vida looked up at him, her cross shaped pupils staring right into him. Her face looked soft, her beautiful turquoise colored hair flowed in the wind. Her human-like features made her look soft, like he could run his claws through her delicate sheep coat. It was almost addictive to look at her, the same infatuation he felt when he first sensed her in the universe was now coming back. But there was something else, he felt deeper and strong.

The red was back. He was seeing red now. It was like he was swimming in more red. His breath became frantic and his heart was pounding in his chest. What was this?

Her voice soft, " Do you think we can love each other my Death?"

Before he could speak her lips reached his.

The red took over.

After that he was awkward, like really awkward. He didn't know what she just did or why he enjoyed it but he wasn't sure if that was even okay. For basically millions of years now Death has worshiped Life with every fiber of his existence. But that wasn't the same thing as love. He couldn't love her like the mortals loved each other. Love made them weak.
Love was the reason they were clingy towards each other and why they refused to let eachother go when separated permanently. He separated them permanently. Death did this to many, he was clearly not made for love. He destroyed love. He destroyed it everyday.
Even if Vida says that love is immortal, he still can never see himself loving. He didn't deserve that kind of affection. Worshiping Vida was not the same thing.
Death can only be associated with suffering. So no he can't love.

…Then why did he want her everyday?

Theoretically he was not made to love, and neither was she. Vida spent her everyday creating souls and sending them into the mortal realm. Why does she think that she even had the time for that? A romantic relationship. Why did she have to be so naive?
Then again, this was Vida, she was always naive. And he wouldn't want her to change any other way.

This body didn't help either. For some reason he felt more.

It can only be described as lust. Lust, yes that was probably it.
Lust was not love, he couldn't possibly be in love. Nope.
It's just lust.
And he could accept that.
At least lust didn't equal him, possibly hurting Vida. He could never…never…..

The red didn't leave him though, it only increased.

It's been three hundred years since he last saw Vida, He's been purposely avoiding her. Ever since that kiss he didn't have the courage to look her in the face anymore. It was just like his time as a little black blob in space, too afraid to face her so he hides. He felt like a coward.

At this point he could be considered one. And he hated that. Most importantly he hated himself. All he's been doing these past decades was focusing on his job, reaping souls and letting them pass in the afterlife. It didn't matter what mortal it was, he came for all. He knew more mortals than they knew themselves. Children were usually his least favorite victims. The despair in their eyes and the lack of understanding they had over what happened to them.

He is usually avoiding children for this very reason.

Death was resilient when it came to his job and the routine of collecting souls. The mortals sometimes associated him with Satan or some religious entity that could be heinous. That wasn't true however, true he could be blood thirsty and even sadistic. But death was usually like that towards mortals that didn't appreciate their lives. The arrogant ones that thought mortality was to be taken lightly. The ones that think that they were better than life. Better than Vida herself…

It pissed Him off and he showed them no mercy.

Honestly he should stop thinking about Vida, it would do him no good.

Right now he was trying to focus on his next job, specifically one that involved an old woman that lived in a small cottage in the woods. He was currently waiting outside the cottage. The smoke was coming out of the chimney. He decided to enter the home.

He did it quietly and persistently.

His favorite souls to reap were usually the older. They didn't look at him in despair or hate. Like he was being cruel by taking them away to the afterlife. Like he actually liked seeing them cry and beg, the despair in their eyes. The elder looked at him like an old friend. With open arms and ready to leave the mortal realm and pass on. He found it…comforting in a way. It helped feel less like a monster.

So he continued on the house, the wolf hoped. That this woman didn't make this difficult. Every time he revealed himself to a human they always had a different reaction. So he calm and entered the room where the old lady was resting.

She was on her bed, not asleep. Rather she was reading a book, a fairytale book to be specific. She noticed him immediately, her eyes widened. He was now standing over her bed. It was very awkward, she just stared at him. He didn't smell fear, but rather confusion.

"Who are you?"

"The grim reaper…" Her eyes widened. She immediately got out of bed and stood up. She looked no older than 85 and was very frail. He can see why now it was almost her time up.

"Oh dear….but I'm not ready!" what? What the fuck?

What did she mean she was not ready? Honestly he was getting sick of mortals telling him that. Why was it hard for them to come to terms with him as a concept? He came for all, and spared none. He was getting tired of this shit.

"I don't know what to tell you…" he began. "I'm Death, straight up. I'm getting tired of you people telling me you're not ready. I know I'm a monster, I know that you all look at me like I'm the one being cruel. But get this through your head, I come for all and spare no one!" he fumed, his claws digging into his skull.

The old lady was silent, the wolf mentally cursed himself. Great, now he let his emotions get the better of him. When did he become so weak? The older woman spoke up.

"...It sounds like you're stressed…how about we have a cup of tea? If this is my last night of living I would like to be relaxed while I die. But also I can tell that you're upset." Wait what? His red eyes looked at her skeptically.

"This will do nothing to spare you-"

"I know"

"If you're trying to distract me, that won't work either."

"...I know"

" Are you aware of what you're offering here? I'm literally Death. The personification of Death. And you're offering me tea…."

She sighed "I know…"

Well this was strange, he wondered if this mortal had hit her head or her offering tea was just her way of coping over the idea of him taking her soul soon. Either way it didn't make this any less awkward. Y'know what? What would having tea do to him? Nothing, he knew it was probably foolish but he didn't care anymore. He hadn't had anyone to talk to in three hundred years…..

"I accept your offer."

He was immediately regretting accepting this offer. Turns out the older lady had cats and they were all currently staring at him in curiosity. His appearance as a wolf is certainly jarring. Death glared at the little gato's and they all ran out the room.

The old lady came to sit in a wooden chair right next to him, and she handed him a tea cup. She got comfortable, humming to herself as she drank the hot liquid.

He stared at the hot liquid, the strange scent from it made him feel disgusted. But part of him didn't want to be rude. So he sipped a bit of it, only to cringe at the sourness in it. Why was it awful?

"It's lemon." the older woman confirmed.

Oh well that explained it. He groaned, setting the tea cup on the table while sitting on the table. The two stayed silent before the lady killed it.

" I don't really have many regrets…." she started, his ears perked up at that. "I think I lived a simple but eventful life. I didn't have many friends when I was younger but I was content." Her facial expression turned sad. "But…" He listened, it was rare that mortals say that they didn't have regrets. So he was genuinely curious.

"I have one regret…" She set her tea on the table. She looked him in the eyes, with no fear, just sadness. " When I was in my late 30's, I fell in love…so deeply in love." He frowned "It was a woman around my age, she was someone I treasured and trusted with my soul. She made me feel alive, for the most part our relationship was healthy and we were inseparable." She was shaking now, she looked away from the wolf. She almost looked ashamed to look him in the face.

"What happened then?" he asked.

"Our interests and dreams were different, we were both so different. And I….I was scared…I felt like I didn't deserve her…So I ran…"

Oh.

His face softened, and he gave her a sympathetic look. Despite her sadness, the old lady still continued to speak.

"I was a coward…and for the next few decades I was too scared to go back to her." she wiped
her tears and quivered. "That is my only regret." the wolf huffed, thinking about what she just said to him.

"What about you? Have you ever been in love?"

Death narrowed his eyes to the old woman. And simply said "No."

He can never love. Death couldn't love something so much beyond his understanding. And love only leads to pain and heartbreak. Something he'd like to avoid for himself. This woman's backstory is a good example as to why love was bad to begin with….

"You're lying."

Death stood up, his height towering over her. She continued to talk.

"Your death right? Why would you feel the need to lie to me? I'm just a puny mortal to you and you even go and take souls everyday. So tell me, who are they? Are they the reason why you're stressed?" THIS LITTLE-

She was right though, Death HATED that she was right. He had nothing to hide from this woman and it wouldn't lead to consequences if he told her the truth. Again, he hasn't talked to anyone in three centuries. Motherfucking- He stepped away and walked to the window, he looked at the moon that was shining through the glass. The same moon vida created, he remembers her voice, it was smooth like butter.

"Death, do you think the wolves on earth will like the moon? How would you feel if I make it red once a year? Just for you, I know red is your favorite color."

"I can't love her." he painfully whispered.

The older woman didn't move and she only listened.

"She deserves better than me, and part of me wonders if I can even give her what she wants. I've done nothing but ignore her for the last three hundred years because I'm a coward. I fear the idea of loving her because I can hurt her. I know I can, I'm the embodiment of destruction and hate. What could she possibly see in something like me?"

"Does she love you?"

The wolf was silent before he exhaled "Yes…"

"Then talk to her. I made a mistake in the past, and It's something I regret everyday. I never went to my lover to talk about it because I was too scared of losing her. If I learned anything in this life it's that regret is one of the worst feelings anyone can experience."

The wolf turned his head to the lady, his face contorted.

"So…please….Don't leave her."

….

The wolf took the old lady's soul that night, but her words were forever engraved in his head. So probably for eternity .

He told Vida to meet him near the same lake where she kissed him. He sat near the same spot too, looking out in the wide open of nature. Death was calm right now. He could do this. He wouldn't run anymore, he would confront her and try to talk things out. Like where their relationship stood and discuss his actual feelings towards her. He can do this. He can-

"Murete?"

He snapped his head towards the voice and he was immediately terrified. She was now wearing a beautiful outfit, her hair nicely curled and her outfit flowing though the nice wind. Vida honestly looked better than last time he'd seen her. He gulped. She walked over and sat right next to him, simply smiling at him. Lobo felt like he was going to have a stroke.

"So, how-"

"I'm sorry"

She blinked, and chuckled out "Death, It's fine, I understand that-

"No it's not fine." He stressed, his ears were back and his shoulders were sagged. He basically looked like a sad puppy right now, like a dog waiting for punishment after he was caught doing something wrong. "I left you, I left you without telling you anything, and I purposely avoided you Vida, I'm a fool. I was scared of my own feelings and I was scared of your own affection."

"Muerte…it's only been three centuries. You needing your own time to yourself is fine. It was unexpected, yes, but I wasn't angry with you when you did."

"It shouldn't have done it to begin with. My intentions weren't exceptional and in the end I intentionally left you-
Vida hugged Lobo.

The wolf froze, not in fear, but just froze.

" I'm just glad you're okay my muerte~" He shivered at the word "my". Oh god Oh god Oh god-
His cheeks flushed and his heart was once again hammering in his chest.

The sheep let go of him and he shriveled up in embarrassment. He had rubbed the back of his neck and avoided her gaze.
Muerte looked adorable.

"I still love you. Mi amor~"

He finally felt like he was gonna have another stroke. The red was coming back, it was intoxicating. The colors were blurring but this time only in red. Oh god this feeling again-

"I-I…." Well it was good that she wasn't mad at him then.

"Do you want to see the new home I made for myself? We can go there and "talk" …" She gave him a wink and giggled.

what.?

He was going to have an aneurysm with this woman.

—-

He shouted within the world that is muted.

She shouted back.

His words were silent, yet weeping.

She will be there to comfort him.

His world was dark and silence was his only muse.

There was no more silence and she was his only muse.

What did he do to deserve her?