AN: Another update! This is another tease, but I think the next chapter more than earns the rating. Enjoy!

Tara was sitting on the couch when Mac walked in.

She'd gone back to Gemma after Chibs had disappeared, and helped clean up the aftermath of the carnival. When Chibs hadn't returned that night, Mac had gone home. A few days had gone by before he'd called to tell her all about the rapist. He'd signed off by saying he'd been gone for a least another few days. With some effort, Mac had squashed her disappointment.

"Wine?" she asked Tara, noting the dead look on her friend's face. Tara nodded.

"What's up?" Mac said, grabbing a bottle and two glasses.

"Kohn's back." Tara said tonelessly. "And I might still be in love with Jax."

Only quick reflexes stopped Mac from spilling the wine everywhere.

"Well." she said, handing a glass to her friend. "Start drinking. You've certainly got better reason than I do."

"What's your reason?"

"Chibs and the guys will be gone for another few days."

"And?"

"And I want him here so we can fuck until next week."

Tara's eyes narrowed.

"Lucky bitch."

Mac snorted.

"So, elaborate." she said, sitting down.

"Well, Kohn left flower petals on my car."

"Creep. How do you know it was him?"

Tara sighed.

"He also sent me a photo of Jax and some blonde in bed. He cornered me, made it clear that both gifts were from him, and that I should never go back to Jax."

"Let me guess, he suggested himself as a suitable alternative?"

"Yep. But that's not all. Abel pulled through, which is great. But Jax and I had a moment when I filled him in. Then earlier today, Gemma came by to offer me a gun with the serial number filed off for my protection."

Mac smirked.

"So, you've got a stalker ex-boyfriend, another ex-boyfriend who might not be an ex, and a crazy possible future mother-in-law."

Tara nodded bleakly.

"Let's start with Kohn." Mac continued. "Gemma's got the right idea - carry that gun everywhere. No exceptions. We'll go to a range soon, too. You have to practice. Shooting it needs to be instinct when you need it most."

"I know how to shoot." Tara replied. "But you're right, we should go to a range. I'll carry it."

"Good. I also think you should tell everyone about the restraining order - Hale, Jax, Gemma, the club, everyone at work. Anyone who might see him near you, and could use it against him. I'm serious about this. I can offer some level of protection, but you have to be proactive. He's just a stalker with power right now, but we've both seen how it can get really bad, fast."

Tara nodded again.

"Now, tell me about Jax."

"I honestly don't know what to say." Tara said, grimacing. "He has a newborn son, his baby momma is an addict, his mother is a nightmare, and he has more girls after him than a fucking rockstar. How do I fit in?"

Mac considered.

"I think you're the one that got away."

Tara bit her lip.

"Seriously, I don't think he's ever stopped loving you. Can you honestly say that you've ever stopped loving him?"

Silence.

"That's what I thought." Mac said decisively. "Now, Gemma is the definition of an overprotective, overwhelming mother. But she thinks she'd protecting her family, which isn't just her job as a mother, but also her job as Clay's old lady. And she takes it seriously. Not only did you break Jax's heart, but you left her club behind. You hit her where it hurts, twice."

"I think it's going to take more than a few months for that wound to heal. And you're going to have to prove it, words won't be enough. But Tara, god, before you even try, you have to be sure. You left him and the club once. If you do it again, hurt him again, no one's going to forgive you. But more importantly, why the hell would you put yourself through that again for anything less than total certainty?"

"You're right." Tara said quietly.

"I've been afraid of Gemma for a long time. And I know I hurt her just as much as Jax when I left. You know, I never really left Jax, though. I left the club - I had to - and Jax is SOA to his very core. I'm honestly not sure what hurt him more - leaving him, or leaving his club. I didn't mean to tear up old wounds by coming back. I thought I'd left my feelings for him behind, but obviously I was wrong. But… if there's a way, any way Jax and I could make it work, I'd try. Despite the club."

Mac shook her head.

"But that's just it, Tara. It can't be 'despite the club.' There's no keeping your life separate from it, if you're Jax's old lady. It comes with him, and I honestly think that's what has Gemma worked up the most. That if you make a life with Jax, he will always be caught in some tug-of-war between you and the club. Gemma doesn't want to for him, and neither should you. He'd been incredibly unhappy."

"You know what I do, and somehow, you seem to have reconciled with it. I mean, realistically, the club isn't any worse than me. If you want Jax, you have to find a way to reconcile yourself with the club, too. It can't been this thing on the periphery that you ignore. It's his family, and if you're with him, it's yours."

"I know, I know." Tara said. "He and the club have always been this package deal. I know the rules, I know what it means to be an old lady. I've even got the tattoo, for Christ's sake. I just need time."

Mac shrugged.

"Everybody needs time." she said. "Jax needs time to deal with his newborn kid. Gemma needs time to deal with the past slapping her in the face. If you need time, take it. But be sure - can you live with the club in your life for the rest of it?"

"But what about the blonde?" Tara asked quietly.

Mac rolled her eyes.

"She's just a croweater, Tara." Mac said. "Come on, you know it doesn't mean anything. You don't have a leg to stand on, there, either. It's not like you and Jax are back together. Yet."

Tara sighed.

"I know, it just… bugs me."

"That probably means something."

Tara hummed.

"Nothing good." she joked, smiling now.

"You're the best, you know." she said, looking at Mac. "Keeping my head on straight."

Mac chuckled.

"You never told me, by the way."

"What?"

"How Chibs turned you around. Last we spoke, you didn't want a relationship."

Mac grimaced.

"It's really a long story."

"Well, we've got plenty of time, and plenty of wine."

Mac eyed Tara carefully. After telling Chibs about Peter, there'd been an almost cathartic sense of relief. She knew that continuing to talk about it would be beneficial, and Tara did deserve to know.

But was she ready to hear it? Tara was so hesitant when it came to the barest truths about the club - a story like Mac's could send her running away. But then again, maybe it was a good test. Maybe it would be a good way to check her reaction before sliding back in to the world of the Sons.

Mac nodded.

"What I'm about to say never leaves this room." she began. "It's me, Peter, and Chibs that know the whole story. And I will understand if, after I'm done, you would like me to leave."

Tara's brow furrowed, but Mac ignored it, and launched into her story. It was easier to tell the second time around, easier to get through the rough parts without the emotion that had choked her up the first time. She gave Tara every detail, and every benefit of the doubt. But there had been no need to worry. The doctor had a streak of compassion in her a mile wide.

Tara took her hand halfway through, and did not let go.

"And so I was - I mean, I am worried that Peter's look for a way back into my life." Mac finished. "And with Chibs, it's personal enough that Peter won't be able to help but go after him. It's likely just a matter of time."

"That monster." Tara whispered. "How can someone be so cruel?"

"I don't think I'll never understand it." Mac sighed. "But it was Chibs that put my head on straight. Even still, there's blood on my hands, too. My original intention was still to kill another."

"Your intent wasn't malicious towards innocent people!" Tara cried. "You were following the orders of someone you trusted, someone you loved. That makes you human. You're loyal and kind and an amazing friend. You have an enormous capacity to love, and the strongest moral center of anyone I've ever known. You were deceived. And who doesn't have skeletons in their closet?"

Mac smiled softly.

"Thank you." she said, throwing back the last of her wine.

"You know, that's what Gemma and Jax are looking for." Mac added. "That acceptance. You have this awesome way of seeing the best in people. When that's freely given, it's a priceless gift. You should give them a chance."

Tara nodded.

"You know, I never found out what happened to that poor girl from the carnival. She's recovering nicely, by the way."

Mac grinned.

"Oh." she said. "Well, as sick as it sounds, it was the carnival clown that attacked her."

Tara's lip curled.

"Yeah. But Chibs called earlier today and told me that the girls' dad, Oswald, had Clay track him down, since the police are pretty useless around here. The Sons found him, cut off his balls, and mailed them to Oswald."

Mac watched humor chase revulsion across her friend's face, before Tara finally settled on disgusted laughter.

"Jesus." she choked out.

Mac nodded in agreement.

"You know what though," Tara said, "every now and then, those guys do it right."

—

By the time Friday afternoon rolled around, Mac was jumpy and wired.

The several days that Chibs had mentioned had come and gone, and there was still no word from the guys. She would've been concerned that something had gone down, but word would somehow have gotten to her. Someone would've let her know if Chibs wasn't okay.

Still, when her phone buzzed, Mac reached for it eagerly.

"Hey Gemma."

"Hey Mac. How are you?"

"No complaints. Everything's okay?"

"Yeah, just fine. I'm just called to invite you to my fundraiser tonight. Thought you might like a night out."

"Sure, Gemma. When and where?"

"Actually, there pretty limited parking, so I'll have the prospect come pick you up." Gemma replied. "5:30pm okay?"

"Sounds good."

"Oh, and by the way, I think the guys will be around tonight. I've threatened Clay with physical harm if they don't show up."

Mac laughed.

"Looking forward to it. Thanks for inviting me."

Excitement lit a fire in Mac's stomach, and all of a sudden, 5:30pm couldn't come soon enough.

True to Gemma's word, the prospect rolled up in a pickup not until her own that evening.

"Hey Sack!"

"Hi Mac!"

The prospect was an easy kid to like. He was kind of like a puppy dog, and he and Mac had developed something of a friendship during her time in Charming. It helped that both she and Chibs genuinely liked the kid.

"What's new, prospect?" she asked, slamming the door behind herself.

Half-Sack filled her in on some clubhouse drama, and Mac learned that the guys were training him to fight. This piqued her curiosity, and brought up memories of her own training.

"How good are you?"

Half-Sack shrugged.

"I'm small, so I'm not very strong. But I am fast. I hit well, I think, and I don't go down easily. Why?"

"I can help you out." Mac replied. "Most of the guys are way bigger than you - you need someone small to learn how to fight small. And I had the best teachers."

Half-Sack looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"I don't know if Chibs would like that very much."

Mac laughed.

"I honestly think Chibs would find it a turn on." she said. "When do you train next?"

"There isn't really a schedule. They just drag me out to the ring some mornings, but things have been crazy for a little while. Just come over when the guys roll out of bed one morning."

He waggled his eyebrows, sliding into a parking space.

"Just follow Chibs."

Mac rolled her eyes, climbing out of the cab and slamming the door.

"You guys all have your minds in the fucking gutter." she said.

"Ya cannae blame us, darlin'." said a familiar Scottish brogue. "No' when there's lassies like you runnin' around."

Chibs.

He was a sight for sore eyes, but looked whole and healthy. He sauntered towards her, wrapping his arms around her before kissing her with a week's worth of pent-up desire. His hands ran everywhere, reveling in the heat of her underneath him, the physical feel of the body of the woman who'd kept him up every night, hands on himself as he tried to stave off the all-consuming desire.

I've been gone too long.

They might've stayed like that all night, but they were interrupted by a slow clapping. Chibs pulled back slowly, nipping at Mac's lower lip. She turned, and noticed that the clapping was coming from none other than Tara.

"Quite a welcome." Tara said, smirking.

"What're you doing here?" Mac asked, ignoring the jibe.

Tara shrugged.

"Supporting the community." she said.

Mac saw right through that. No doubt Jax would be around here, somewhere.

Chibs reached for Mac again, who danced out of his reach.

"Hey, I thought we were here to support the community!"

Chibs narrowed his eyes.

"Mackenzie."

His voice was low enough that Tara couldn't hear him, and filled with heat.

Oh yes. Yes, please.

"Mac!"

A look of pure, absolute frustration crossed Chibs' face. Mac swore under her breath, and turned to greet Gemma.

"Hey Gemma."

"I'm so glad you made it!"

The biker queen looped an arm through Mac's, and she was forced to wave goodbye to Chibs as she was dragged away.

—

Gemma kept her busy up though the end of dinner.

The frustration seemed to build exponentially as time wore on, and she knew Chibs felt similarly, though he was occupied with club business. Eventually, the guys found their way back to Gemma's tent.

Jesus, he looks edible.

Chibs had situated himself up against a tree, doing nothing more than staring at her. Mac felt herself flushing. She had the distinct feeling that she was being toyed with, like a predator playing with it's food.

Tara nudged her.

"Go." she said. "I'll cover for you."

Mac gave her friend a grateful smile before turning back to Chibs, who motioned with his head towards the building that the tents were lined up against. She slipped out, following him around the back, and then he was on her.

Chibs wasted no time, caging her against the wall, invading her personal space, and latching onto her neck.

Mac whimpered, and the sound went straight to his cock.

Do that again, lovely girl.

He teased her, kissing everywhere except where she wanted him most. It was lighthearted enough that Mac knew they wouldn't be able to leave, yet. But that didn't stop her from running her hands everywhere - under his kutte, through his hair, over his dick, hard in his jeans.

"Fuck, Mackenzie." Chibs growled against her neck.

Mac pulled back enough to plant her hands on his chest. She shoved him, hard, and while Chibs was strong, he shifted back just enough. Mac grabbed his kutte and reversed their positions, taking the opportunity to kiss him full on the mouth, teasing be damned.

Chibs smiled under her lips. Bastard.

"Filip." she murmured. "We need to find a less public place. Now."

Chibs pulled back, nodding. But Mac could see it in his eyes.

"Can't yet, darlin'." he said.

Mac swore.

"Which absolute asshole do I have to kill to get you to myself?" she growled, frustrated beyond belief.

"In this case, one that deserves it."

His voice was dark, and Mac sighed, realizing that, whatever it was, it was serious.

"Go." she said, backing away from him. "Come over tonight, when you're free. Tara has the night shift, and I'll wait up for you."

Chibs nodded. Mac blew him a kiss, still backing away.

"You've left me waiting long enough, Filip. Left me wanting, alone with nothing but my hands."

Sure that he would find her later, Mac turned, and sauntered off to find the prospect for a ride home.

Chibs swore, but stayed leaning against the wall, cursing Kyle, himself, and every god he could think of. But he could survive a few more hours.