AN: Cue the dramaaaaa and angst. Couldn't be all happy all the way through. Enjoy!
The wind was loud in her ears, the roar of the bikes echoing off the barren rock around them.
Seated on the back of Chibs' bike, and pressed as close to him as possible, Mac savored the adrenaline coursing through her system.
The club was on their way to the Irish for what was technically a charity ride, but was really a gun run. Mac had come along at Cameron's request - she wasn't happy about it, but Clay was in no position to refuse.
She was also intensely curious, after their last conversation. If it really was Peter behind all of this, the manipulations would continue. Half of her wanted to see Cameron again, only to know for sure if the message had been from Peter in the first place.
Chibs hadn't reacted well when he'd heard. Mac had not been a fan of the way his eyes had narrowed when Clay relayed Cameron's request. As if it was a personal insult to him, rather than just a curiosity. For a moment, Mac had been offended, until it had clicked.
The Sons' partners weren't just IRA members, they were Jimmy O's IRA members.
It explained almost everything, and Mac's fury at Clay had skyrocketed when she realized that not only had the Sons forced Chibs to interact with Jimmy O' for all these years, but they'd also forced him to play nice. One of the reasons Chibs couldn't go after Kerrianne and Fiona was because it would disrupt the relationship the Sons had with the Irish, and Chibs couldn't be certain that his brothers would back him up.
The thought pissed her off enough that by the time she swung off Chibs' bike, she'd worked up quite a bit of anger.
They were ushered into the back room, and greeted by Cameron and a younger man he introduced as his son. Mac stood back, loitering behind the pack of Sons as they greeted the IRA representatives. She kept on eye on Chibs - who was looking more and more like a caged animal the longer they were in the room - and the other on the Irish, who she didn't trust for a moment.
"Jimmy O', some o' the bosses migh' be comin' stateside."
What?
Cameron sighed when everyone turned to Chibs, who stiffened noticeably.
"Tiocfaidh ár lá." Chibs said.
Their day will come.
The Irish Nationalist slogan meant many different things to many different people. But the way Chibs said it, Mac knew he wasn't talking about England or Ireland. He was talking about Jimmy O', and all those that had wronged him and his family.
It didn't stop the nerves in her chest from twanging, reignited by the phrase that Peter had used so often.
Once Cameron was finished, he motioned to Edmund, leaving his son to explain the details of the gun-running operation. The Sons converged on the table in front, while Cameron walked over to Mac instead. Mac didn't miss the way Chibs' eyes narrowed at them, but she just shook her head lightly.
"Hello, Mackenzie." Cameron greeted.
Mac gave him a nod.
"Thanks for comin'."
"Didn't have much of a choice." Mac said.
Cameron winced.
"Sorry ta drag ya up here, lass. I hav' another message from one of ma bosses. He's very interested in ya."
His eyes were curious, and Mac tried her best to play it off as confusion.
"Well, it's jus' another phrase." Cameron continued. "You're familiar with it: tiocfaidh ár lá."
And there was the proof Mac had been looking for.
Somehow, Peter had integrated himself with the Irish bosses, realized Mac was connected to the Sons, realized the Sons were connected to the Irish, and built enough power to reach out and terrorize her.
Her spine stiffened.
"Why is he so interested in ya?" Cameron asked.
Mac shrugged.
"I have no idea." Mac said. "How can I, when you can't even tell me who he is?"
"I didn't…"
"Honestly, I have no previous connection to the IRA, or Ireland, for that matter. Perhaps your boss has me mixed up with someone else."
"I suppose." Cameron said, but Mac knew he hadn't bought it.
"So, your injury's healing okay? Mac asked, changing the subject.
Cameron laughed.
"Oh, ya, the doc did an excellent job on me. My arse is as good as new."
Mac snorted.
"She'll be pleased to hear it." Mac said, secretly thinking that Tara would rather forget all about that night.
She and Cameron exchanged a few more pleasantries before he left to join the Sons. Mac slipped outside and took a seat near Chibs' bike, her back to the building. The position allowed her to watch the road from both sides.
Now that she was positive Cameron's messages were coming from Peter, she had to figure out what to do about it.
What could she do about it?
She'd made no progress on that question by the time the guys reappeared, loaded down with rolls of blankets. Chibs joined her, tying his own to the back of his bike.
"Wha' did Cameron want?" he asked immediately.
Mac just shook her head. At the very least, she'd decided to play it off to Chibs until she could figure out how to handle it.
"To flirt." she teased, using Chibs' mistrust to distract him.
His eyes narrowed.
"Bloody mick." he growled.
Mac took his face in her hands.
"Hey." she said softly. "You've got absolutely nothing to worry about, Filip."
Chibs' eyes softened.
"Mac!"
It was Half-Sack that had yelled for her, waiting in the driver's seat of a pickup.
"Duty calls." Mac said, standing.
She was parting ways with the Sons here, on a job that was going to take her out of Charming for at least the next few weeks. Half-Sack had been assigned to drop her off on the way back. It worked well, since Mac didn't want a vehicle with her anyways.
Chibs swept her up in a hug and a kiss, the passion that they'd started with still going strong. Mac's heart seized, unhappy with the thought of not seeing him for weeks, even moreso after Cameron's message.
When they pareted, she brushed his scars with her thumbs.
"Be safe, Filip." she said, meaning the words in more ways than he could guess.
"And you, luv'."
—
Mac walked into the motel room just as one of her phones rang.
Not the one she was using for the job, not the prepaid she used for contracts, but the personal number she'd given to everyone in Charming.
Odd.
She'd given everyone fair warning, asking that they limit contact as much as possible. So far, they'd listened.
Of course, that meant it was probably important. Mac checked the caller ID, and flipped the phone open.
"Hey Tara, what's up?"
"Mac." Tara's voice was tight, and Mac was immediately on alert.
"What's wrong?"
"It's Chibs." Adrenaline tipped into Mac's bloodstream.
"Tara, what the fuck happened?"
"There was… there was an explosion."
Mac struggled for breath.
"Tara, oh god, Tara, is he…"
She couldn't say it, couldn't speak it into existance.
"No, Kenzie, he's alive." Tara said, words rushing out now. "I'm sorry, no, he's alive, just in critical condition. He was working on a van that exploded, and he got blown back, landed on his head. They have him in a coma right now, to help him heal."
The doctor paused.
"Mac, if you can, now would be a good time to come back. If he stabilizes, he'll be fine. But if he doesn't…"
Mac knew what that meant. She swore violently.
"I… I can't fucking leave, Tara." she said.
It was the truth. She was neck deep in a mission, and leaving right then would probably get her and a few other operatives killed, not to mention piss off some very powerful people.
But the pull to return to Charming as soon as possible was undeniable. For a second, Mac took a step back.
That type of emotional connection, that wasn't her. She didn't get attached. Work always came first.
Of course, that made it very clear.
This was Filip.
The one person on this earth who knew her completely, inside and out, better than anyone. Who wasn't just with her for the good things, but also for the bad. He was her partner, her lover, her confidante. Her outlaw.
And she was in love with him.
Fuck. Shit. Shit timing, Mackenzie.
Tara misinterpreted her silence.
"Mac, it's okay. He would understand."
"It's not fucking okay." Mac said bitterly. "But there's nothing for it. Look, I don't have much time. I need you to do some things for me - do you have a pen?"
Tara made an affirmative noise.
"I'm going to give you my account information. It'll be more than enough for his medical expenses. I pay for everything. If the moron puts up a fight - because he probably will - just tell him I said to shut up. Ready?"
Mac recited the information.
"What else?" Tara asked.
"Just… please keep me updated. You can call this number. I can't answer very often, but leave a message. Be as detailed as you can. Please, Tara, I need to know everything."
"Of course, Kenzie."
"I'll be back as soon as I can."
When they hung up, Mac sat heavily on the bed, holding her head in her hands. Wondering when she'd let Chibs in as far as she had.
In love.
If she was being honest, it had been coming for a while. Mac may not have recognized them, since the feelings were so different from when she'd been with Peter, but there was no doubt they were there, and strong.
The realization made it near impossible not to drive straight back to Charming, and hold vigil with Tara.
But the mission was far from over.
As if to remind her, that phone rang next.
Mac sighed, swallowed the lump in her throat, and switched back to work mode.
—
Hey Kenzie, its Tara. Hope you're okay. I just wanted to call with an update.
Chibs is a lot better. He stabilized shortly after our phone call, and has been recovering steadily since. He's not completely out of the woods, and he definitely looks like a guy who just got blown up, but he's better. I'm fairly confident he'll recover nicely.
Unfortunately, the news is not so good for the rest of them. Some misguided intention led them to shoot up a church fundraiser - I don't have any more details than that. Idiots. The whole group of them ended up in prison, so it's been a rough few days. We're not really sure where it goes from here.
Clay and Gemma made up a few days ago, which has helped a bit. Jax and Clay had an actual physical fight over something, which was terrible, but seems to have released some tension Jax was carrying around. They seemed better afterwards, though I know Jax is still struggling to convince Clay that the club needs to head in a safer direction.
I ended up talking to Gemma about JT's manuscript, too. I don't really know what she thinks, though if I had to guess, I'd say she's pissed that JT is still interfering in her life. I'm not sure. Sometimes I wonder if she didn't meddle… well, that's a conversation for in person, I think. Jax is going to eventually have to face her. She'll require just as much convincing as Clay, if not more.
Anyways, with so few of us left at the garage, everyone's just doing their best to hold the club together.
Stay safe, and come back as soon as you can.
—
Mackenzie, it's Gemma. Hope you're okay.
Look, I know Tara's been keepin' you updated, but I wanted you to know about… about Chibs' wife. Fiona. She's back, and no one's really sure why. Just showed up out of the blue to see Chibs in the hospital. She's a conniving bitch, in my book, and I'm pretty sure she's angling to get him back. Just felt like you should know.
Also, if she's back, Jimmy O's not far behind. Jesus knows what'll happen if he goes at it with Chibs again, especially if Fiona's in the States. Just… come back as soon as you can. I'm doing my best to keep everything togther, but we could use you, Mac.
—
Chibs was worried.
Mac had been gone for too long, longer than she'd originally anticipated. And she hadn't responded to anyone's messages or calls since his accident. She hadn't come to see him, hadn't asked about him, and still wasn't back. Not even today, when he was eagerly anticipating his freedom.
She's on a job, mate. Chill out.
He had a sneaking suspicion that Mac had been paying his medical bills, too. But when asked, Tara would only say "It's covered, Chibs, don't worry about it."
But if that was Mac's doing, why hadn't she called?
And then there was Fiona, who'd picked the worst goddamn time in the world to come back. And where Fiona went, Jimmy O' was, as well. Chibs was also certain that both Gemma and Tara had called to let Mac know, which frustrated him. A voicemail message was not how Chibs had wanted Mac to hear about Fiona.
Fuck.
When they wheeled him out, Chibs greeted his brothers joyfully. They shepherded him back to the clubhouse, though the following part ended abruptly when Jimmy O' finally made his presence know.
Bastard.
His visit was short. There was a man with him that Chibs didn't recognize. He didn't have any sort of accent for Chibs to recognize, either. He was tall, cruelly handsom, and kept looking at Chibs like he knew him, which made Chibs wildly uncomfortable.
Jimmy O' made sure to notice, though, and introduced the man as Murphy before antagonizing Chibs about Fi and Kerrianne, and leaving with his thugs.
The whole thing left Chibs breathing hard, swearing certain revenge.
—
Kenzie, it's Tara.
Happy got your signal; thanks for letting us know you're okay. I would so love to talk to you right now.
Things aren't great in Charming right now. Chibs is worried about you. He's almost completely recovered by now, but Fiona is still here. And Jimmy O' showed up, along with a pack of scary Irish guys. Did you know all this stuff about Chibs' past? Jimmy sounds like a major asshole.
Separately, and I'm not even sure I should be telling you this, but… well… I saw Fiona kiss Chibs. I don't… I'm not sure what the context was, you understand, but I saw what I saw, and you deserve to know what you're coming home to.
I'm so sorry, Mac. Be safe, and hurry home.
—
Mac swore, slamming the phone shut.
The mission had gone FUBAR after her original phone call with Tara, leaving Mac unable to respond to any messages, much less call. They were getting through it, but it had been frustratingly slow, forcing Mac to stay away from Charming for much longer than she'd originally intended.
At the literal worst time possible.
And Charming appeared to be FUBARed as well. Chibs' accident had shaken her, and Mac was still haunted by guilt over the fact that she hadn't made it back during his recovery, or even gotten to call. In the meantime, the rest of the club had gotten themselves in serious trouble, right when Tara and Gemma really needed them.
On top of it was the information she was trying not to think about.
Fiona and Jimmy O's arrival.
Chibs and Fiona's reunion.
Her body alternated between too hot and too cold, unsure of what to feel - fear, devastation, fury? Sorrow? Some kind of savage rage that rippled through her when she thought of Chibs and Fiona, together?
It Chibs had lied to her all those times he'd sworn that he and Fiona were over…
None of those thoughts were helpful in the moment, so Mac found herself shutting them out, boxing them away until she had the bandwidth to actually consider that she'd fallen for him, only to have him run right back into his estranged wife's arms.
Back to work, Mac.
—
A few days later, Mac was free.
The job had ended in quite a bit of chaos, leaving her with a few wounds and a lot of exhaustion, but it was finished. Mac had left for Charming the minute she could, and had never felt so happy to be driving back into that little town. But when she pulled into TM, searching avidly for Chibs, she found the place empty.
Weird.
The guys could've been out on club business, but the clubhouse was empty. No girls, no hangarounds, no one.
Shrugging it off, Mac drove to Jax's house next, looking for the prince or Tara, wondering what the hell was going on.
The first warning that something was off was the slightly ajar front door.
It creaked open when she pushed it, her other hand on her gun.
Mac stifled a gasp.
In front of her, Cameron stood with Abel in his arms, holding a large kitchen knife to the child's head. In front of him, Tara had collapsed on the floor, sobbing. Between then stood Half-Sack, doing everything he could to deescalate the situation.
At the sight of the knife to Abel's head, Mac reacted instinctively. She ran at them, marking the exact moment that Cameron noticed her. He switched tagets with the knife, instead shoving it towards Half-Sack in an attempt to eliminate at least one of them.
But Mac was faster. She slammed into the prospect, shoving him out of the way. At the same time, her fist met Cameron's face.
If she'd been a moment later, Cameron's knife would've buried itself in Kip's stomach.
As it was, Half-Sack went flying, head hitting the table, and collapsed on the floor. Mac took a good slice from the knife, though nothing life-threatening. Tara, her medical training kicking it over the shock, crawled to the prospect. Mac turned to Cameron, who had a bright red mark on his face, and had turned the now bloody knife back on Abel.
"A son for a son." he said, and dropped the knife.
Mac didn't have time to be confused, as Cameron grabbed the front of her shirt and yanked her to him, Abel's warm body squished between them.
"You." Cameron said, gazing at her. "But for ma boss, your friend, you'd be mine."
What the fuck?
He kissed her hard, and Mac's entire body recoiled.
She shoved him away, trying simultaneously to grab Abel.
Get off me, you rat bastard.
When Cameron pulled back, Mac spat in his face, but he kept a hand on her shirt.
"Fuck off." she said. Cameron just grinned.
"Your friend will see you soon, Mackenzie." he said. "And then maybe he'll let me have a turn, too."
He shoved her back with all his strength. Mac stumbled, and her head hit the wall with a crack.
Everything went dark.
—
Mac felt herself being rocked awake.
The throbbing pains in her head and side were the next thing she felt, and they woke her up enough for her to groan.
"Mac?" That was Tara's voice.
Mac groaned again.
"Oh, thank god." Tara said.
Mac opened her eyes, and found herself in the back of a van. Tara sat next to her, Half-Sack in the passenger seat. Opie was driving.
"What? What the fuck?" Mac asked, mind unbelievably fuzzy.
"Do you remember what happened?" Tara asked urgently. "Cameron took Abel, and you and Half-Sack got knocked out."
Mac nodded, and immediately regretted it.
But it had all come back. She sat up, gasping, ignoring the increased pounding in her head.
"Abel!"
"We're on our way to the docks." Tara replied. "Cameron's got a boat there - the guys are trying to catch him first."
Mac thought Tara seemed remarkably put together given what had just happened. Her hands were covered in blood, and Mac followed the trail to Half-Sack's head and her own knife wound.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't do much for it. I've been trying to help Kip."
Mac just shook her head.
"How is he?"
"He'll be fine. Head wounds always bleed a lot. He'll probably have a concussion, and so will you. That was quite a hit you took, as well. Not to mention that this will need stitches."
She motioned towards the slice on Mac's waist.
Mac looked down, examining it for herself. It was a fairly deep slice, and exceedingly painful given it's location. Her shirt was torn where the knife had passed through, so she finished the job and used the strip of fabric to hold pressure over the wound. Trying to stop the bleeding, though her entire left side was already covered in blood.
She sat up, trying to force the fog from her brain and prepare herself for what came next.
But they were too late.
—
Mac, Tara, Opie, and Half-Sack came sprinting down the docks just as Jax sank to his knees, yelling his grief to the air.
Cameron was watching from the deck of a boat, chugging away, just out of reach. Tara stumbled beside her, and Mac grabbed her friend's arm. She felt the loss herself, like a punch to the gut. They came to a stop in front of the guys, Mac supporting Tara's weight while keeping her other hand on her knife wound.
Jax stood, rushing to Tara.
"Tara, what the hell happened?" he asked wildly. "Why is my son gone?"
He was in shock, Mac noticed. Terrified and in shock. Not thinking clearly at all. Tara must've noticed as well, because she took him off to the side to talk quietly.
Chibs was devastated.
Jax's son, gone. At the hands of the IRA. The same bastards that had ruined his life were now fucking with Jax.
Goddamn bloody micks.
When Tara, Mac, Opie, and Half-Sack had come running down the dock, Chibs had a brief moment of joy that was swamped by an unexpected - and strong - spike of raw fury.
He didn't notice the awkward way Mac was holding her side, didn't notice the exhaustion in her eyes, didn't notice the devastation on her face. Instead, he watched as Tara took Jax aside, listening to their conversation, his vision tinged slightly red.
"…Mac showed up… Cameron shoved Kip… then kissed her, told her her IRA friend would see her again soon, whoever that is…"
Chibs' fury increased, and he suddenly understood it.
Mac had missed his accident, and the long recovery that had followed. She hadn't shown up at all for him while he'd been in the hosptial. Hadn't even called, couldn't even find a moment to pick up the phone.
And now Cameron? The prick that Chibs knew had been flirting with Mac for a while. But how could Mac return those affections, how could she do that to him?
Now, she'd gotten the prospect injured, Abel kidnapped, and was still somehow planning to meet up with Cameron? Who else could the "friend" be?
When Mac stepped forward to embrace him, Chibs stepped back.
A wary look crossed her face.
"Where the hell have ya been?" her growled, incredibly angry.
Mac felt her hackles raise.
He's angry with me?
"Oh a job, Filip. You know that."
"Really?" he asked acidly.
The venom his voice had gotten the attention of their entire group.
"Or have ya been helpin' the Irish behind our backs?"
Mac recoiled.
"What are you talking about?"
"See, it kind of looks like this, luv'." he said, the endearment mocking.
Anger fired in Mac's stomach.
"It looks like you and Cameron were together. I always knew he was flirtin' with ya. Tha' night at the clubhouse, all those requests ta talk ta ya. But I never thought ya'd return it. It looks like ya left at an opportune time ta help the Irish fuck everythin' up. Why didn' ya come back when I go' blown the fuck up? Did ya ever care?"
But the last sentence, Chibs was yelling.
"I was on a job, Filip."
Mac did not yell.
"Yeah, sure." Chibs said sarcastically. "Ya sure ya weren't help' out ma replacement? Cameron? Ya sure moved on fast. Tell me tha' isn'a how Half-Sack ended up injured tonight. Tell me tha's no' how Jax's son ended up in Cameron's hands! He kissed ya tonight! I jus' heard Tara tell jix! And your next move is ta wha', go find 'im in Ireland? Start a happy family with the IRA?"
Mac wasn't sure whether she hated the anger or disgust in his voice more. How had this happened? What had inspired Chibs' mistrust?
She chose her words carefully.
"Whether you believe me or not, I was on a job. Just after your accident, it went FUBARed. I was forced to go radio silent, Filip. I would've been killed for violating it. You don't think it destroyed me not to come back? Not to even call? You don't think I felt every inch of that guilt?"
Mac shook her head.
"Of course I cared. Tara and Gemma left me as much information as they could. I paid your medical bills. I thought of you every free moment I had. I was panicked and scared and afraid. I wanted nothing more than to run back to you, but I simply fucking couldn't."
She paused.
"I have to say, though, Filip. Those voicemails that they left me? Lots of information. I heard all about your happy reunion with Fiona. Guess you reconnected while I was away. Does this happen every time I leave, Chibs? Do you reconnect with some croweater?"
Mac's acerbic voice was all the more powerful for how quiet it still was. For the first time, Chibs was faced with the full, terrifying weight of her disdain. Her intense judgement - and he was found wanting - came with a warrent that she was willing and able to execute with force.
She would leave him, if she wanted to.
"Still don't believe me?" Mac asked.
She pulled out the letter she'd gotten from Happy, who'd reached out to her after Tara had begged him to check on Mac.
"This is from Happy. He was worried about me after I had to cut communication. You want proof I was working? Here."
Mac dropped it at Chibs' feet.
"Need more?"
Mac turned and lifted her shirt, showing the entire group a neatly stitched wound across her back from a gunshot she'd taken the day before.
"Another lovely scar to add to my collection, courtesy of my target."
She dropped her shirt.
"You basterd, Filip. I was on a motherfucking job. I thought you could accept that. I accepted you for who you are. I believed you. I trusted you. Obviously, that was a mistake."
Mac straightened her spine against the grief.
"I'm not working for the Irish, either. I got sliced knocking Kip out of the way. It was bad luck that I shoved him into a table. Cameron grabbed me and kissed me against my will. Was Fiona kissing you against yours?"
She laughed, and the sound was like breaking glass.
"And when he was done, he threw me against a wall and knocked me out. That's how he was able to get away with Abel. It took Tara to wake me up, at least partially because I'd lost a fair amount of blood by then."
Mac lifted the hand that was still applying pressure to her knife would, showing it to the group. They didn't miss the red that had stained up and down her entire side.
"I didn't help Cameron take Abel. He told me "A son for a son." Maybe you can tell me what that means. I didn't plot with him, didn't plan for any of this to happen. If you'd listened to everything that Tara said before attacking me, perhaps you might've known."
Mac tilted her head, and Chibs felt something sever between them.
"You cherrypicked the parts that made you the most upset. But what exactly is it that you're mad at me for, Filip? Because from where I'm standing, you're the one kissing your wife."
He opened his mouth, but Mac cut him off with a snarl.
"I'm not fucking finished. I wouldn't cheat on you, you fucking idiot. I'm in love with you. But I cannot believe, after every secret we've shared, that you honestly believe I would betray you with a member of the IRA. And you know what else?"
"Tiocfaidh ár lá."
Chibs recoiled.
"That's what Cameron's message was, on the day of the charity run. I told you that Peter used to say that all the time. That friend Cameron mentioned to me today? It's fucking Peter. I warned you that he would try to ruin me, ruin anyone I'm close to. I wouldn't be surprised if he's been working with Jimmy O' for a while, now."
She sighed. Mac turned around, facing the rest of the guys, deciding to finish her story once and for all.
"Peter Murphy was a fellow government employee. We worked together, and started dating. He was a controlling, abusive bastard. The worst of it… he used me to kill and woman and her daughter. I didn't know until it was too late. And believe me, I have never fucking forgotten. I ran from him as soon as I could, but it's only ever been a matter of time before he caught me."
"He's the Irish friend. He's working with Jimmy O', I'm sure of it. I have no idea what his plans for the Sons are, but they almost definitely result in pain. I'll understand if all of this is too much, if you all never want anything to do with me again. What I did was heinous, and I can never make up for that. But you need to know who is working with Jimmy. Peter is careful, clever, smart, and cautious. Do not underestimate him."
She turned back to Chibs.
"I didn't want to believe it, but it's the only thing that makes sense. And I would never go back to him. God, Filip, I don't even understand how you can accuse me of this shit. Helping to kidnap Abel? Or helping the Irish? Sleeping with someone else?"
"Jesus, that makes you the biggest fucking hypocrite, too. Reconnecting with Fiona after assuring me, promising me, that you didn't love her anymore? That she was only your wife in name? Fuck off."
Mac turned now to Jax.
"I have… no words. I'm so sorry that I couldn't do more to save Abel. I'm so sorry that I failed when he needed me the most."
Finally, she turned to the group at large.
"And I'm sorry that I brought you into this with Peter. It's going to get worse before it gets better. Now, I'm going to take Kip and myself to the ER, and then I'm going to go home. I just… I need to go. I'm sorry, so sorry that I failed you all."
Mac walked away, leaving Chibs with a look on his face that made her entire body throb with grief. She was flanked by Tara and Gemma, both of whom glared at Chibs as they walked by.
And though Mac didn't see it, Chibs was now the focus of his brothers' anger. The thundercloud in his mind had collapsed, leaving dust in it's wake. It was gone.
Mac was right.
Fiona.
Stahl.
Jimmy.
Chibs' concern for his life, for his family's life, had twisted him up and resulted in this. The guilt came, thick and oily.
Mac had been on a job. Of course she had. She'd been honest with him from the beginning. And after everything she'd done to prove herself, he'd accused her of cheating, of betrayal of the very worst sort.
And she'd looked at him like he was a stranger. He'd sadness for all of a moment before that mask had come down, erasing all of the Mackenzie that he knew, and replacing her with someone brutal and hard.
Chibs would've run after her, tried to erase that look. But for the wall of Sons blocking his way.
I'm in love with you.
He'd honestly wondered if he'd ever get to hear her say those words. What a gift they would've been - were. But one he couldn't appreciate, not now that he'd fucked it all up.
Maybe the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he'd just ripped her heart out and set it on fire.
—