Author's Note: TW for references to self-harm and trauma, dissasociation.
I made up some potions!
Also, so sorry for the long wait! I (finally) got a job I applied for so I'll be teaching Young 5s/Developmental Kindergarten! I have been trying to get things ready as school starts in a week and I have to move everything into my classroom (and the other teacher didn't move her stuff out so there's a lot of that). Plus, the writer's block was hugeee in this chapter. It's a bit of a filler, but with some good stuff, especially at the end. I'm wrapping this story up and only plan on 4 more chapters at the most. However, I do plan on writing a sequel! So anything that wasn't tied up will be addressed. I love you all so much and your comments never fail to bring a smile to my face. You're the best. You are loved!
Guest Reviews:
Urgwaew: I am SO glad you liked it! And haha, this part in your review "Also, they look like a continuation of your naming once-appearing-'characters' after HP actors - I think I recall Remus having a session with Tom Felton once." YES! Nice catch! I am so glad you found the scene as they walked to Dumbledore's office funny. I had fun writing it, too. I'm also glad you liked the line about 'making the marauders look like saints' line. Maybe I'll write a one-shot about Remus encouraging Harry to seek extra help because it would be funny! I could NEVER kill Sirius! Ever! I love him so much! Besides, I see any form of entertainment (books, tv show, movie, play, etc) as exactly that, entertainment. I (personally) don't know why so many things need to be so sad! I want tog et away from life when I engage in entertainment, not mirror it! Anyway, you're amazing and so are your reviews (and so is your writing! SO GOOD!) to anyone reading this, I highly recommend you read and review Urgwaew's work! You are so loved!
Chapter summary: The adults come up with an action plan to help Harry. Remus checks in with Harry about how he's doing. Harry talks to Albus.
Previous chapter summary: Harry has the nightmare/vision from Voldemort where he sees Sirius being tortured in the Hall of Prophecies in the ministry. He wakes up his friends to get his godfather. Harry finds out that Sirius was/is alive. The adults help Harry deal with the aftereffects of Voldemort breaking into his mind.
Harry was given a strong dreamless sleep that night (guarantees 8 hours of sleep, but highly addictive and difficult to brew) as well as a potion that would act as a temporary barrier for his mind (again, difficult to brew and can only be used with the dreamless sleep Harry took). This allowed Harry to be put to sleep because there is no way he would've slept otherwise. It also allowed the adults to take a moment to talk.
"He's asleep," Sirius whispered, coming out from Harry's room.
Albus, Minerva, Snape, and Remus were all in the sitting room in the Marauder Quarters.
"He may have the potion tonight, but it will not be there tomorrow."
"He needed a good night of sleep," Remus pointed out.
Albus stepped in. "He did. I'm glad he has these potions tonight, thank you again, Severus, for making them. We also need to talk about a long-term solution."
The adults nodded and Severus spoke up. "His Occlumency lessons need to be a priority. He has to block his mind."
Albus nodded. "You're right. Until we take care of the Horcrux, Harry will have a connection with Tom."
"And how do we do that?" Sirius asked, hoping Albus had an answer.
Unfortunately, Albus did not. He sighed and said, "I've been talking to Poppy about any sort of removal. I've talked to Gringotts about Goblin magic and I've contacted dark magic healers across the globe. I haven't been able to find a solution. I do, however, have an idea about what we can do in the meantime."
Sirius nodded because Albus had explained this to him while Remus was with Harry.
"This is what I was talking about, Remus. Listen to him," Sirius said, nudging his husband.
Remus nodded and looked attentively at Albus.
"Tom has Horcruxes. For him to die, the Horcruxes need to be destroyed. A long, long time ago I had thought that Harry would destroy the Horcruxes."
Sirius hadn't heard that part originally. He stood up and pointed at the headmaster. "OVER MY DEA-"
'Sirius, that is no longer the case," Albus interjected, urging him to sit back down.
"That is an adult task for wizards who are much older and wiser. Merlin, even muggles know that the brain isn't developed until 25 or 26. That isn't a task for anyone under the age of thirty! In addition, even if Harry was 30, he isn't mentally or emotionally healthy enough for that."
Albus nodded with a small smile. "Thank you, Healer Lupin. I of course want what is best for Harry and I also want these Horcruxes destroyed. Tom will become weaker with each one destroyed. I believe that it will become more difficult for Tom to invade Harry's mind as we destroy them."
"So, let's destroy them," Sirius said matter-of-factly. "Where are they?"
Albus shook his head. "We don't know."
Sirius leaned back and rubbed his face. "It's better if you lead with that, Albus."
Minerva chuckled at Sirius' comment, but quickly stifled herself.
Ignoring the comment, Albus continued. "I have ideas and we will talk more about them at another time. When we do go looking for them, we will take turns. This is too much for any one person to do. And no one will go alone."
The adults nodded. This was a lot of important information.
"Good," Albus said, content with what he said. "I do believe Severus wanted to talk more about Harry's Occlumency."
Severus gave a sharp nod regarding the headmaster. "Yes. As I've said, we need to make sure Harry's barriers are up. He needs more training. We've worked hard, but he's not there yet."
"Should he take additional lessons?" Minerva asked.
"Hmm," Dumbledore thought. "That might be a good idea. I think I can provide him with some supplemental lessons, as well as Sirius and Remus. I believe you already do some private lessons with Harry, don't you, Minerva?" Albus' eyes were twinkling.
Minerva was able to give Albus a millisecond of a scathing glare that no one would notice except him (that nosy man), but she said, "I am giving him private lessons, yes. He is doing well."
"What is it for?" Sirius asked.
Minerva opened her mouth to come up with an excuse, but Albus intervened. "Private Transfiguration lessons. She cleared it by me. Harry's been working a bit above fifth-year level and she wanted to continue to challenge him while also spending time with him."
Remus smiled at Minerva and patted her hand. "Thanks for taking him under your wing. He does love his grandmother."
"And I love him. Now, back to Occlumency," Minerva said, getting everyone back on track.
"Yes, well I believe the supplemental lessons will be helpful. What about OWLs?" Severus asked.
Remus nodded. "You have a point. OWLs are approaching and we've got to make sure Harry's not too overwhelmed. His mental health is fragile enough as it is. I do not want to add more pressure than we have to."
Albus nodded and everyone was silent, thinking.
"He could postpone some of his OWLs until the summer? He could take his Potions, Transfiguration, and History OWLs after the term is over. Severus, Sirius, and I can all monitor him as we know the situation," Minerva suggested.
Dumbledore hummed, stroking his beard. "That might just work. Severus, how do you feel about it?"
"Seeing him multiple times a week for Occlumency is enough for me. I am fine with that arrangement."
"Of course, I'll do anything to support my son," Sirius said, not even waiting to be asked.
"Then we can go forward with that plan. I will inform the ministry and considering all three of you are licensed and on board with the plan, there should be no issue."
The adults continued to talk about Harry and their concerns and plans for another hour until Remus caught Sirius stifling a yawn.
"Is there anything else we need to talk about right at this moment? I know we have some very important things to discuss, but Sirius and I must also get some rest as it was a long day and will be a long weekend," Remus said.
"Of course. Nothing else at this time, thank you, gentlemen," Albus said, standing up with Severus as they went to leave.
"If you need anything at all, please get me. I will check in tomorrow, alright?" Minerva said, looking between Sirius and Remus.
"We will, Mum. Thank you," Remus said, kissing her on the cheek.
Once everyone was gone, Remus turned to Sirius. "We've got to take care of ourselves, too."
Sirius nodded. "You're right. I know that was important information, but you're absolutely right."
"Speak up when you need it, okay?" Remus asked softly.
"You too," Sirius pointed out with a raised eyebrow.
Remus nodded and hugged Sirius.
"Now," Remus said when they pulled away. "We need to get to bed. Are both of us sleeping in Harry's room tonight?"
"I don't think either of us wants to be without him," Sirius pointed out.
"True," Remus replied. "Let's get ready and head in there."
Remus and Sirius both got ready for bed before going to Harry's room. They each took a side and curled up near their son. They were here and weren't going to let anything happen to him.
When Harry awoke the next morning, Padfoot was still snoozing next to him. Harry couldn't help but smile because he had actually gotten a good night's sleep in who knows how long. Harry sat up and Padfoot lifted his head and popped into Sirius when he saw that Harry was awake.
"Harry! Good morning, Pup! How're you feeling?"
"I feel good. I got to sleep, Dadfoot," Harry replied, smiling.
Sirius beamed and said, "That's brilliant! I'm so happy for you!"
"Where's Moony Da?" Harry asked, looking around.
"Probably making breakfast. Want to go to the kitchen with me?"
Harry nodded and Sirius helped Harry off his bed and to the kitchen.
"Good morning, Harry! How'd you sleep?" Remus asked when he saw his son and husband join him in the kitchen.
"I slept good, Moony Da," Harry replied with a smile.
"That's fantastic!" Remus replied, grinning. "Sit down. I've made some pancakes," Remus set down a plate in front of Sirius and Harry.
"I suppose I can't take those potions again tonight?" Harry asked weakly, spearing a piece of pancake and dipping it in syrup.
Sirius looked at Remus and Remus gave Harry a sympathetic look as he shut off the stove and joined him at the table.
"I'm sorry, Love. They are both difficult and rare potions and highly addictive. We had to fight to get you them last night. I insisted you get a decent night of sleep."
Harry had expected that answer and smiled gratefully at Remus. "Thanks, Moony Da."
"Anything for you, Cub," Remus said, sipping his tea.
Harry smiled gratefully and took a bite of breakfast before asking, "What're we going to do today?"
"Well," Remus began, "you and I are going to chat and-" Harry cut Remus off.
"Again!? Merlin, an evil wizard breaks into my mind and sends me a vision of my father dying and you think I need therapy?!"
Remus managed to stifle a chuckle (years of being a teacher will help you keep a straight face) and raised his eyebrow at Harry's sass.
Harry ducked his head at his father and quietly take another bite of his breakfast.
"As I was saying," Remus said, still raising an eyebrow at Harry, "We're going to check in and Madame Pomfrey wants to check you out-"
Harry interrupted again but from actual indignation this time, not just sass. "Aunt Poppy?! Why? I'm healthy!" Harry insisted, standing up.
"Harry James, sit," Sirius said sternly.
Harry knew to obey that voice and sat down glumly.
Sirius continued in his stern tone. "Aunt Poppy wants to make sure you're healthy. Besides, you had an enhanced dreamless sleep last night and she wants to make sure you are okay."
Harry shrugged. He didn't agree with it but somewhat understood what Sirius was saying.
"Now, let Moony Da finish what he was saying. You know better than to interrupt like that," Sirius chided.
"Sirius," Remus said lightly, putting a hand on his husband.
Harry looked down, chastised. "No, Moony Da. He's right. 'M sorry."
Remus studied Harry for a long moment and gave an approving nod. "I forgive you. May I continue?"
Harry nodded.
"Alright. We're chatting and then you're seeing Aunt Poppy. After that, you're going to have some lunch and then rest. You'll study until dinner and then we'll chat about what next week looks like and then it's off to bed."
Harry nodded. He didn't like the schedule, but he'd talk to Remus more about it in session.
"Eat up," Remus reminded him.
Harry had zoned out, lost in his thoughts. He nodded again and took some bites of his breakfast.
"So, Sirius, how are your classes right now?" Remus asked, bringing the conversation back to everyday topics.
"Good. My poor seventh years, though," Sirius said, launching into a story.
Harry half-listened and half zoned out. He was doing alright, he just had a lot on his mind. Remus seemed to notice this and when Harry was done eating, Sirius cleaned up while Remus ushered Harry to his office.
Once Remus shut the door, he began speaking. "What's going on in your head, Cub? You became quiet during breakfast. Are you okay?"
Harry gave Remus a small smile and nodded. "Yeah. Uh, I keep zoning out. Could I use a weighted blanket?"
Remus was pleasantly surprised at the request. Harry hadn't asked to use any sort of manipulative, object, or strategy before except fidgets. My, how his cub had grown.
"Of course!" Remus assured him, getting up to grab a weighted blanket for Harry.
Harry gave Remus an appreciative smile when he put the blanket on him. He allowed himself to gather his thoughts and come back to reality before speaking.
"When Dadfoot told me to stop interrupting, it was nice. I mean, I don't like getting in trouble of course, but it was normal. That was something he'd say to me on any normal day. It was nice to have something so normal said. I don't have much normal in my life anymore."
Remus hummed and nodded. "That sounds uncomfortable."
"Yeah," Harry nodded. "I know my life is kinda wild, but I appreciate the normalcy."
Remus smiled and nodded and Harry added, "And no, Moony Da, that doesn't mean I want to be in trouble more often."
Remus chuckled and shook his head. "I don't plan on it."
Harry grabbed a fidget and played with it for a while.
"How are you feeling this morning?" Remus asked gently.
Harry shrugged. "I mean, I got a good night of sleep, and that seems to help. I feel better than I did yesterday.
"That's good," Remus praised, giving Harry an encouraging smile.
"Yeah," Harry replied, giving him a half smile. "I still have to remind myself that you and my friends and Dadfoot are all okay. I also don't like to think about my mind being vulnerable to Voldemort. It really freaks me out."
"It's a lot. We've had some conversations about what we're thinking about. Would you like to hear about them?"
"Yes, please," Harry said.
Remus nodded and got comfortable in his seat. "Alright. So, we've talked about protecting your mind and increased Occlumency lessons. However, in addition to the ones with Professor Snape, you'll also have sessions with Professor Dumbledore, Dadfoot, and myself."
Harry felt nervous about everything Remus just said, but couldn't help but ask, "What do you mean, you?"
Remus smiled. "I may not have the art of Occlumency down pat, but as a mind healer, I was taught how to form a shield and block my mind. I also was taught how to clear my mind and that is something we can work on together."
Harry nodded and then looked away nervously. "What about Professor Dumbledore?"
"Are you asking about what he's going to do?" Remus asked, clarifying.
Harry nodded.
"Well, I think he's going to test your walls and give your more tips on Occlumency, but I can't be completely sure."
Harry nodded again and looked away.
Remus allowed Harry to think for a few moments before bringing him back by gently saying, "Harry? Harry? What're you thinking about?"
Harry sighed and wrung his hands together before grabbing the fidget that he previously set down.
"I don't know if I want Dumbledore in my mind. I mean, I didn't want Snape in my mind, but I felt like there was nothing to lose. I thought he hated me. I mean, I know now that he doesn't, but I believed that if Snape saw anything there was no way that he could think any less of me. Dumbledore, on the other hand, he's my granddad. And I'm still working on forgiving him. It's a lot."
Remus nodded. "Yeah, that is overwhelming. I completely understand why you'd feel that way."
Harry nodded now.
"Can I say something?"
"Of course," Harry replied.
"What do you think could help you in this situation? Your feelings are valid and real. I also don't want your thoughts to lead you down any dark path. What do you think could help?"
Harry huffed. "I dunno!"
Remus leaned back and allowed Harry to think and calm down. Harry sighed and grumbled, "I guess you're thinking of talking to Grandad."
"Well, I think that would be a positive and helpful action. There are other things, too."
"Really?" Harry asked, his head popping up.
"Of course. You can communicate with him in other ways, like a letter. You can also refuse lessons from him. I'm not going to make you attend extra lessons if you don't feel safe. You can also practice mindfulness strategies."
"You wouldn't make me go?"
"Of course not. Harry, I want you to know that you are safe, loved, and important. If you truly didn't feel safe taking extra lessons, I wouldn't make you. None of it would be productive. We changed your lessons with Professor Snape after the first time so you would know that you are safe. Your safety is one of the most important things to us."
"Thanks, Moony Da," Harry said gratefully. He paused before asking, "Moony Da, what do you think I should do?"
"I'm not going to tell you how you should handle the situation, Harry," Remus reminded him.
Harry bit his tongue in frustration at the therapist-y answer and reworded his question. "Will you walk me through what talking to Granddad might sound like?"
Remus smiled at Harry's question and said, "Of course. So, you would tell Professor Dumbledore that you'd like to speak to him. You would tell him that you are worried about any memories he'd see, or anything else on your mind."
Remus paused to look at Harry who nodded to show he was following what he was saying.
"I am not Professor Dumbledore so I can't speak for him, but I can assure you that he would take your concerns seriously and talk to you about them. He would not do anything you aren't comfortable with. He loves you, Harry. He wants what's best for you, even if it is a bit jumbled sometimes."
Harry nodded. He let what Remus said sit with him for a minute before saying, "I feel better after hearing you say that. I think I must've known that deep down, but it feels good to hear you say that."
"Of course. I'm so glad to hear that," Remus said, smiling.
Remus and Harry continued to talk for the rest of their hour session until they wrapped up and Remus brought Harry to the hospital wing.
"I still don't like that I have to do this," Harry grumbled.
"I never liked going to the hospital wing, either. Sorry, Cub," Remus said.
"You could just let me skip it!?" Harry asked hopefully.
"Ha! Aunt Poppy would hunt us down and stick us both in a bed."
Harry groaned, knowing it was true, and sooner rather than later they ended up in the wing.
"Professor Lupin! Mr. Potter! I'm glad you're here!" Poppy said, bustling over to them.
Remus half dragged Harry to meet the mediwitch and she put her hands on her hips seeing Harry's face.
"Now, I'm not about to pull out your toes. Why the long face?"
"I'm healthy, Aunt Poppy. I don't need to be here!" Harry insisted in a hushed voice.
Poppy's face softened at the term of endearment and put her hand on Harry's shoulder. "I think I'll be the judge of that, hm? I'm glad you're here for a check-in."
Harry sighed and nodded.
"Now, to your bed. I'll be there in a moment."
Harry shuffled over to his bed and Remus stayed behind him to make sure he wouldn't leave.
With a wave of Remus' wand, the dividers came around Harry's bed. "Nothing's going to hurt," Remus assured Harry.
"I still don't like it. And I could've done this on my own!" Harry insisted, pouting.
"You would've come here by yourself?" Remus asked with a raised eyebrow.
Harry suddenly found his nails very interesting.
Not long after, someone slipped through the dividers. "Hey, Harry."
"Draco! I didn't know you were here today," Harry commented, sitting up on the bed.
"Yeah, I like it."
Harry looked at Remus and blushed. "I know my dad is here. It's kinda weird."
Draco waved it off. "Harry, if I was in your shoes Snape wouldn't let me out of his sight. You know I don't care."
Harry felt a bit better with that reassurance.
"Now, Madame Pomfrey said I could start your checks. She said I can do your magic levels and a basic diagnostic."
"Go ahead," Harry confirmed.
"Alright. It should just tingle a bit," Draco warned him. Once Harry nodded, Draco waved his wand, focusing, and cast a spell on Harry. A parchment and quill started taking notes. "Okay, and now the magic level," Draco said, biting his lip in concentration. A different parchment appeared now and wrote something down.
"Bugger! It was supposed to be on the same one!" Draco said, crossing his arms.
Madame Pomfrey slipped through the dividers now.
"You're doing rather well, Draco. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. Here, don't forget to do this wand movement," Madame Pomfrey explained, showing him. "This connects the two spells."
"Ah, I forgot that," Draco admitted, practicing in the air.
"You did both the tests and that's the important thing. Be proud of yourself," she encouraged him before doing a couple of spells herself and taking a look at the parchment.
"Well, you seemed to have handled the potions well. I'm glad you got some sleep," Poppy said, giving Harry an approving smile as she looked up from the parchment.
"Hmm, your magic levels do seem to be a bit low from the excitement yesterday."
Remus stood up and looked at the parchment that Poppy was holding.
Harry groaned and Remus looked up to give him a reassuring smile before looking back down again.
"Alright, Harry," Poppy said eventually, rolling the parchment up. "Good news, you're going to live."
"Goody," Harry said dryly, completely forgetting his company.
Poppy, Remus, and Draco all looked at him in concern and Harry quickly backpedaled. "It was a joke. Now, what did the parchment say?"
Poppy eyed him a moment longer before saying, "Well, your magic levels are low, like I said before. No magic today. You should be okay for lessons tomorrow. No Occlumency or any other major magic until Wednesday, alright?"
Harry nodded.
"You're good to go then. Remus knows what to do. Don't hesitate to get me if you need anything, alright?"
"Alright, thanks, Aunt Poppy. Thanks, Draco."
"Anytime, Love."
Draco waved and Poppy bustled away to see another patient as Remus helped Harry out of the bed and back to their quarters.
"I won't take your wand, but I don't want you using magic today, okay?"
"Yes, Sir. I understand," Harry nodded.
"Should I ask about the joke you made?" Remus asked lightly.
Harry groaned. "Moony Da! It was a joke!"
Remus cast a silencing charm around them as they walked. "I know humor is a coping mechanism and Sirius and I did and still do use it as well. Just know that you're not alone and to reach out for anything you need. We love you, Harry."
Remus knew that Harry was stable currently and he didn't want to push too much because it would make Harry too uncomfortable. Besides, they finished their therapy session for the day.
"I love you too, Moony Da. I'm doing alright, really. I'm not stellar, but I'm not really sad or hurt either. I'm just taking it one day at a time."
"And that's all you can do right now. I am so proud of you."
"Thanks, Moony Da."
They arrived at the Marauder Quarters shortly and Remus brought Harry to his bed.
"Rest up, Cub. I'll see you later." Remus kissed Harry on his forehead before leaving and shutting the door to update Sirius on what Poppy said.
Harry had a mellow rest of his day. Like any student when they're under magic restrictions, Poppy let the professors know about Harry's restrictions. Because of this, Harry was excused from Potions. Sometimes he didn't have to use magic to make the potions, but Harry had a feeling this potion could've triggered him as well based on Snape's reaction. Either way, Harry found himself on Monday morning walking to the Headmaster's office. The gargoyle immediately let Harry in when he approached and Harry knocked on Dumbledore's door.
"Come in, Harry," Albus said from the other side.
Harry swore that there must be some sort of magical security camera because Dumbledore always seemed to know who was entering his office.
"Hi, Professor," Harry said as he shyly walked in and shut the door behind him.
"Good morning, Mr. Potter. I thought you had potions right now?" Albus asked.
"I normally do, but Snape excused me," Harry explained as he walked over to say hi to Fawkes who greeted him affectionately.
"Professor Snape, Harry, and I'm glad about that. I heard you had some magic restrictions."
"No major magic Aunt Poppy said," Harry said as he went to a comfortable seat.
"Yes, so no Occlumency sessions right now," Albus replied.
Harry shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "I wanted to talk to you about that if it's okay, Grandad? Just a check-in?"
"Of course. What's on your mind?" Albus asked, leaning forward in his seat.
Harry took a deep breath, summoning all his courage, before speaking. "I am a bit worried about my occlumency lessons with you. I trust you, of course, but I know that when Sn- er, Professor Snape does them he sometimes sees a memory. I don't want you to think less of me if you see one."
"Harry, I would never!" Albus insisted, standing up and going to sit by his grandson. "Harry, you mean the world to me. I can't think of anyone else I care more about."
"Really?" Harry asked, his eyes glistening with tears.
"Truly. Nothing I could see would make me think less of you. Nothing I see could make me change my love for you."
"I just don't want to lose my grandda," Harry whispered.
Albus squeezed Harry's hands and said, "May I show you a treasured memory of mine?"
Harry nodded.
Albus got up and went to his vials of memories. He placed it in the Pensieve and held Harry's hand as they dove in.
Once Harry was back on his feet, he saw the walls of Hogwarts. Quickly he saw five-year-old Harry James Potter walking to dinner with his godparents.
"Merlin, I was so little!" Harry gasped.
Albus chuckled and smiled at his past and present grandson.
"Daddies, why is Gwanda talking to another kid?" Harry asked. Albus was about 15 feet ahead of them walking and talking to a student.
"Well, Prongslet, Granddad is the headmaster here, you know that. He has lots of students to help teach and look after," Remus explained.
"But I'm his gwandson," Harry pointed out.
"Yes you are," Sirius said, smiling. "He still has students to help."
Harry furrowed his eyebrows. He let go of his parent's hands and scurried forward to his grandfather. He slipped his small hand in Albus' and turned to the student.
"Dis is my gwanda," Harry said proudly.
"Cool," the student replied, giving Harry a small smile. They were a Ravenclaw.
Albus chuckled and patted Harry's head.
"As I was saying, Professor. I just-" the student began again before Harry piped up.
"He's MY gwanda!"
Sirius had gotten to Harry now and promptly scooped him up with an apologetic smile to the student and Albus and carried him to the Great Hall.
"Hey!" Harry pouted, lightly fighting against his godfather.
"Harry, please don't kick me. It hurts," Sirius chastised gently.
"Oh. Sowwy, Dadfoot," Harry said, stopping immediately.
Sirius bit back a sigh. They were still working on trying to figure out the discipline while being aware of Harry's past abuse and trauma.
Remus gently took Harry from Sirius and said, "You're not in trouble, Harry. We just wanted to remind you not to kick because it hurts."
"Okay," Harry said quietly, feeling a bit better.
"I'm sure Granddad would love to talk to you after dinner, Harry," Sirius said, trying to cheer his son up.
"Weally?" Harry said.
It's been a year and the speech impediment Harry still melts Sirius' heart.
"Really."
Harry perked up now and stayed in Remus' arms until they got to the Great Hall where he proudly sat in between his two uncles. Harry, however, crawled over Sirius and then Minerva when Albus sat down.
"Hi, Gwandda," Harry said, plopping himself on his lap.
"Hello, Harry," Albus said, his eyes twinkling.
"I missed you! THIS much!" Harry said, extending his arms.
"That's quite a lot," Albus replied, smiling.
"A WHOLE lot!" Harry exclaimed.
"I am here now, sweet boy. Would you like to eat dinner with me?"
"Yes, Sir!" Harry replied.
"Ask your godparents," Albus reminded.
Harry looked over at Remus and Sirius who were watching Harry. "Dadfoot? Moony Da? Can I eat with Gwanda? Pwease!"
"Of course, Love," Remus replied after a nod from Sirius.
Harry's chair was magically moved next to Albus'.
"Your grandmother does expect a bit of love, however," Minerva chimed in.
Harry grinned and gave Minerva a giant kiss on her cheek as Albus stood up and walked to the podium to speak to the students.
"Good evening, Hogwarts students. I hope you had another wonderful day."
Harry stood up now and walked over to Albus, slipping his hand in his.
The Hufflepuffs were cooing with delight.
Albus looked down at his grandson who smile proudly up at him.
"Is there anything you wish to add, Mr. Potter?"
Harry looked bravely (while still nervous) out at everyone. "Dis my gwanda. I wuv him."
That's it, it's official. Several Hufflepuffs practically died with the cuteness overload.
There were several chuckles and 'oos' and 'ahhs' from both the staff and students.
"I love you too, Harry. And with that, tuck in!" Albus said, food appearing at his words.
Albus brought Harry back to the head table and ate with him as Harry talked about his day.
The memory slowly faded and Harry and Albus found themselves back in the present.
"I'm sorry I interrupted dinner," Harry said, blushing.
"Harry, my boy, that wasn't the point of the memory," Albus said, leading Harry back to his seat. "I just wanted to show you how much I love you. Five-year-old Harry rather bravely told the whole school that I was his grandfather and that he loved me. You wanted everyone to know. Harry, I am always going to be that proud grandfather. Nothing will ever change that."
Harry gave him a small smile and a nod. "Okay, but with Professor Snape we made a rule that anything he sees can't get me in trouble. Can that still be the deal here?"
Albus paused and Harry quickly added, "No Grandda, that doesn't include hurting myself or others. It's like pranks or being out after curfew."
"My grandson out after curfew? I'm shocked!" Albus said in faux surprise, his blue eyes twinkling.
Harry rolled his eyes and said, "Grandad!"
Albus chuckled and nodded. "Of course, Harry. These aren't to find mistakes, they're to protect you. I want you to feel safe with me."
Albus paused and took a deep breath. "I know I still have to earn some trust back, and I understand that. I'm hoping this will help."
Harry nodded. Dumbledore was right and he wasn't going to deny it. "Okay, Grandda."
"Splendid! Now, it's been quite a while since we have been able to catch up. Tell me all about you! Any new Hogwarts gossip?"
Harry laughed but grinned. Now that sounded like his grandfather.
"C'mon, Granddad, you know gossip goes with tea."
"How silly of me," Albus said before getting a house elf to bring tea and some scones.
While it's true that their relationship wasn't where it once was, it was getting better and that is something both Albus and Harry were okay with. It's all getting better.
Alternatives to harming yourself:
1. Talk to someone you care about and/or trust
2. Exercise
3. Get outside and get some fresh air
4. Have a warm beverage
5. Write something down
6. Go to therapy/ contact your therapist
7. Be with your pet or another animal
8. Take a nap
9. Play or fiddle with a fidget
10. Do something artistic (draw, paint, use clay, play-doh, fingerpaint, etc)
11. Play a game
12. Bake or cook something you like to eat
13. Mindfulness, breathing exercises, meditation (variety of strategies including naming something of each color of the rainbow, 5, 4, 3, 2,1 with your senses, box breathing, rainbow breathing, 5 finger breathing, etc)
14. Listen to music
15. Ice cubes (hold them, put them where you want to harm yourself)