Regina's view

I'm taking Henry to Emma's apartment right now, since girls' night out isn't happening tonight, he asked me if I could take him. I'm surprised Emma cancelled the evening without giving a reason. It's just not like her and I've been worried since Kathrin told me about it. What might be going on at Emma's? Has something happened? What if she is not well? A thousand questions like that are buzzing through my head and I'm getting increasingly restless. Fortunately, we'll be there soon, so I can ask Emma and make sure everything is okay. I hope everything is all right. Henry doesn't know what's wrong with her either, which worries me even more because Emma usually tells him when something is wrong.

Completely lost in my thoughts, I didn't notice that we had arrived at Emma's, only when Henry let go of my hand to unlock the door, I noticed it.

We go inside and I look around, but can't see her anywhere. My gaze lingers on two pieces of paper and I walk up to them. One is addressed to me and I hesitantly take it in my hand. An uneasy feeling comes over me and I suspect that something is very wrong. While I open the note, Henry takes the other note in his hand, apparently it is addressed to him. But I ignore Henry for the moment and begin to read.

Regina,

By the time you read this, I'll be gone. I'm sorry, but I had to leave. I met my biological parents today, they wanted to talk to me, but since I didn't want to talk to them, they gave me a letter. I read it, it is cruel what it says. I understand now why they gave me away, but it hurts like hell and I have to get out of here for now. It has all become too much for me and I need time to clear my head, to be able to breathe properly again. Don't worry I will be back and I will be fine. You won't be able to reach me as I will be turning off my cell phone after I cancel tonight. I am so sorry, please take care of you and Henry, it is not easy for me to leave you guys behind for a while, you have to believe me. I have never found it so hard to leave. I miss you guys already, but I can't help it... Please forgive me for having to leave.

Love Emma..

Two arms close around me and I notice that I have started to cry. I put my arms around Henry and pull him closer to me. He has also started to cry and I gently stroke his head.

All will be well, my darling, Emma will come back and she will take good care of herself. I whisper to him, but I also want to convince myself. Because I think that Emma should not be alone now, she could fall back into her old behavior and hide again, close herself off. I am so worried about her.

Why didn't she take us with her, we could have helped her, we could have been there for her and supported her"? Sobs Henry. A little perplexed about what to say to him, I pull him to the sofa and take him in my arms again.

You know, sometimes adults need to be alone so they can think and have peace. This has nothing to do with you or us, Emma needs to get clarity in her emotional chaos without worrying that she might burden one of us with it..." I try to explain to him, although I can't quite understand it myself yet.

But then she could have taken you with her, you could have given her space and you could have dealt with it. I could have stayed with Granny and Ruby." Henry is right, I would have been there for her without crushing her, because I know the feeling myself and understand that she needs time.

"You're right honey, maybe Emma just had too many thoughts in her head so she didn't think of that possibility." I try to reassure him. To be honest, it wouldn't reassure me.

"At least if we knew where she was..." Henry mumbles to himself.

A thought occurs to me. A while ago, Emma told me about a cottage by the sea, where she often retreated when everything became too much for her. Maybe she is on her way there, then I could keep her company.

I think I know where Emma is going, if you want, I'll follow her and keep an eye on her? I suggest to Henry. He lifts his head and smiles at me.

,Would you really do that mom?" I can hear hope and relief in his voice.

Of course, sweetheart, I want to help Emma too and I worry when she is alone." I say without hesitation.

He beams at me and throws himself into my arms.

Thanks, Mom." I stroke his back until he breaks away from me and stands up.

"I'm going to go pack a few things so you can leave soon." He calls out to me as he walks into his room. I take a deep breath and hope that I am right in my assumption and Emma is really on her way there. If I don't find her there, I'll just look for her. I have to find her, I will be there for her and hold her when she falls.

After a short time, Henry is standing in front of the apartment door with a packed bag, ready to finally go. I get up and we leave Emma's apartment. Henry takes my hand and walks a little faster. He pulls me behind him, with us almost running. This brings us to Ruby's place after only a few minutes and I quickly talk to her and Granny.

"And it's really okay for you guys to take care of Henry?" I assure myself once again after I have told them what happened.

Of course, you have to follow Emma, she needs you now and we are happy to look after Henry". Granny confirms to me while Ruby is with Henry. I nod and then make my way to my place to pack a bag myself. After that's done too, I get in my car and drive off. Tonight I should arrive at the cabin and hopefully find Emma there.

The drive feels so interminably long, probably because I can't wait to finally arrive. I have to convince myself that Emma is doing well so far, before that I won't find any peace. What on earth did her parents tell her that she had to leave town? Did they say such bad things to her again? Why did you show up at all? What did the letter say? I hope Emma doesn't do anything rash... I step on the gas even more, the sooner I arrive the better. Even though it's important to drive carefully, I just can't take that into consideration right now. Emma is more important now, she is always more important. That I worry so much is perhaps unfounded, after all I know that she can take care of herself, but I love her so damn much and I'm not with her now, when she needs me the most. And I should have been with her. If I hadn't just left earlier, I would have been with her when her parents were there, I could have caught her and been a support for her. But no, I just had to leave, coward that I am. Why had I been such an idiot? Why had I just left? I should have been there. But I wasn't and I can't change it anymore. Accordingly, the most important thing now is to find Emma and be there for her. I won't tell her about my feelings for her, because that would be the worst possible time, but I will hold her when she falls and help her get up again.

Finally I can see the hut, I must have been lost in my thoughts for a long time. I don't see Emma's yellow beetle, but there is light burning in the hut, so hope is not completely lost. My heart racing like crazy, I get out of the car and slowly walk towards the hut. What if I hurt her by just coming? What if she flees from me? What if something happened to her? What if I can't help her? What if she's not there at all?

I stand in front of the door, the questions won't let me go and with a heavy heart I overcome myself to get answers to my questions and knock on the door.

Silence. Nothing happens. I knock on the door again. Still no reaction.

Emma? It's me, Regina, please open the door." I try, after three more knocks have brought nothing. Now I hear footsteps coming closer. The door opens and in front of me is indeed Emma, or rather a pale, tearful person who has lost all strength of expression. Without saying a word, I pull her into my arms and just hold her tight, letting her feel that I am there now. Again and again I stroke her back until she slowly relaxes a little.

After what seems like an eternity, I break away from her slightly, take her hand and walk into the cabin. I close the door and pull her, similar to Henry earlier, next to me on the couch, into another hug. She breaks free of it, rests her head on my lap, and closes her eyes. Gently, I run my hand through her hair, over and over, until I think she has fallen asleep. Tomorrow I will talk to her about everything, but for today she clearly needs rest and so I decide to let her sleep and look around a bit in the small room. On the wall, in front of the dark gray corner sofa, is a dark brown sideboard, above which hangs a cabinet in the same color on the right side. Right next to it is a TV and to the left of the TV is another matching cabinet. On each of the cabinets is a potted plant, which bring color into the otherwise dark furnished room. On the wall, on the left side next to the sofa, is a black dining table with four equally black chairs. To the side, in front of the sofa, is a coffee table that is just as black as the chairs. All in all, it's a really dark room, so even the photos on the gray walls don't help.

Since I can't be bothered with the interior of the room any further, I put one arm under Emma's knee, the other around her torso, and lift her up. I carry her into the adjoining room and lay her on the bed. I only knew it was the bedroom because the door was open and I could see which room it was. I walk around the bed, lie down with Emma and pull her into my arms. Automatically she lays her head on my chest. I hope she can sleep well tonight, I will stay with her in any case. Once again I will not leave her alone. With this thought, I also fall into a dreamless sleep.