Regina's view

I open my eyes, feel for Emma with my hand, and startle when I realize that she is no longer lying next to me. I immediately jump up and look for her.

Crap. She is nowhere to be seen, neither in the living room nor in the kitchen. She wouldn't have run away again, would she? I probably would have run away again, too... Damn it, what do I do now?

I just shouldn't have fallen asleep, then she wouldn't have gotten away unnoticed. Angry at myself, I go into the bathroom and continue to think.

The fact that I had fallen asleep and that Emma was able to leave because of it doesn't matter now, but I'm going to look for her until I find her. Before I go to look for Emma, I get into the shower, feel the much too warm water on my skin and try to wash away all negative feelings. There's no point in going now if I'm still so upset myself and can't think straight.

What is going on in Emma's head that she constantly has to sort everything out with herself? I am there for her. Yesterday, when I arrived here, it seemed to have helped her. At least I was able to calm her down. Then why did she leave?

I know that if I'm honest with myself, I'm no better, but it's not about me now, it's about Emma. I would like to help her so much, but I just don't know how to. I also don't know what Emma's parents have written to her, so I don't know what exactly is going on. It doesn't really matter what they wrote, because Emma is obviously not well and that's all I need to know to be there for her. Now I just have to think of a way to help her. But first and foremost, I need to find her. I wonder if that will be so easy. Emma is good at hiding, I'm sure I won't find her this time if she doesn't want to be found... But I will not give up at all, even if it takes weeks to find her. My thoughts just won't stop circling, the negative feelings won't wash off... This shower just doesn't help, I can't switch off or sort out my thoughts, I just worry too much for that...

Emma's view

Even though I wanted to be alone, I am incredibly grateful to Regina for following me around yesterday. I had completely forgotten that I told Regina about this place, otherwise I probably wouldn't have driven here. The fact that she can still remember it, especially where exactly this place is, means a lot to me. I spent many days here, whenever everything had become too much for me, this little house had been my place of retreat. When I arrived here yesterday, I remembered the many days I had spent here in complete solitude, as if it were only yesterday... Many tears I had shed here, many hours I had spent enjoying the peace and quiet I had always felt here.

And although I have been here so many times, I have never felt as comfortable as I did this morning, lying in your arms.

I must have fallen asleep on the couch and then she must have carried me into the bedroom, I can't explain it any other way. Anyway, it felt so damn good next to her, lying in her arms, breathing in her scent and hearing her breathing. All this caused me mixed feelings. On the one hand, I wanted to stay here with Regina, but on the other hand, I wanted to be alone, so I thought about leaving. However, knowing Regina, that wouldn't do much good. I'm sure she would keep looking for me until she found me again. Then I might as well stay here and save myself the trip. I then carefully disengaged myself from her arms so as not to wake her, got up and went to the kitchen. Once there, I put on a cup of coffee. When the coffee had been ready I had drunk a cup of it and then made me on the way to the shopping, because there was nothing edible here in the cottage and I had not made it yesterday. Fortunately, the supermarket was not far away and I could walk there comfortably. A little walk would certainly do me good and so I could still think a little.

How had it all come to this? I don't understand how my parents could have thrown me off track like that. They left such deep wounds in me and tore them all open again with their sudden appearance. They pulled the ground out from under my feet, took away my stability and my family. Of course only metaphorically, because Regina, Henry, Ruby and Granny will always be my family, but they made me leave my family, so they took them from me. They made my heart bleed, my soul split, and made my life a constant escape. I am always running away from my feelings, I have built a meter high wall around my heart, in which there are cracks now. Painful cracks, which were hewn in with emotional violence. Not positive cracks, which I allowed voluntarily to let Regina and the others into my heart.

Arrived at the supermarket, I get everything necessary and then buy rolls for breakfast.

On the way back, I continue to think. It has been incredibly sweet of Regina to drive after me. Having her near me helps me not to completely fall into my former behavior. She gives me back some of the hold that my "parents" took away from me. She is my rock, my air to m breathe... She is the love of my life. How I would like to tell her, but since I know that she is in love with someone else, even if I don't know who, I keep my feelings to myself. But she doesn't make it easy for me, she is always there for me, always knows how to calm me down, touches me again and again, looks me long and intensely in the eyes and always smiles at me so lovingly... Well, maybe she doesn't make it so hard for me on purpose, but nevertheless she does... With her kind, just everything about her, makes it almost impossible for me to control myself.

Now I'm back in front of the cottage, take another deep breath, then go inside and put the groceries in the kitchen. I hear the shower, so Regina is already up. While she is still showering, I set the table and cook myself a cocoa, on which I of course spray cream and sprinkle cinnamon over it.

A little later I hear Regina coming out of the bathroom and turn in her direction.

Holy shit. Regina stands in front of me, covered only with a towel. I feel the heat rising in my head and my cheeks turn red as I let my gaze wander up and down her body. From her, through the wetness, black hair, on her somewhat pale skin, her chocolate brown eyes, her red adorned lips, her slightly protruding collarbones, her cleavage to her long perfect legs...

In my abdomen everything is contracting and the only thing in my head now is the desire to pull her to me, kiss her and let my hands wander on her body. All worries, doubts and fears are gone. What counts in this moment is the intensity between us. I look into her eyes, where you could already call it staring. I try hard to control myself, but it's damn hard for me.

Regina's view

I get out of the shower, wrap the towel around my body and go to the kitchen. Once there, I get a fright that after a second turns into indescribable relief and then turns into discomfort. Emma has not run away again, she is standing right in front of me and I am completely naked except for the towel around my body. Emma examines me from top to bottom and turns red in the face. She is certainly very uncomfortable, like me, only that I wish I could pull her to me and kiss her. We stare into each other's eyes, I can't interpret her look and I lose myself in her eyes. Her golden-green, beautiful eyes, which are especially emphasized by her blond, slightly curly hair that reaches to her shoulder blade.

I don't know how much time has passed in the meantime, I am still lost in her eyes and a wishful thinking is already playing in my head again.

I should turn around and put something on and yet I don't. No, instead I move slowly towards Emma. I could still stop myself, I could still stop it, but I don't want to. I've been fighting my feelings for too long. Granted, the timing is about the worst I could have chosen, but I don't care right now. Emma is still looking at me as she walks towards me as well. We're standing directly across from each other now, our bodies almost touching, but only almost. I put my hand to her cheek and move my head a little closer to her, so that our lips almost touch, but only almost. I look into her eyes one last time before I gather my courage to bridge the last distance between us and my lips gently touch hers. The kiss feels better than in my other imaginings. In addition to the incredible tingling sensation that travels over my lips, the tugging in my abdomen, the acceleration of my heartbeat and the fireworks of feelings inside me, an incredible warmth spreads through me, it's almost as if the kiss were real. If I didn't know better, I would even claim that the kiss, which has now lasted several minutes and is becoming more intense, is real. Emma puts her hand in my neck and pulls me a little closer to her, even though I thought it was impossible. She strokes with her tongue demanding over my lower lip and I grant her the entrance. It is pure madness, even if it is not real...