"If you need someone to count on

When you're down

And all your other friends you've lost

Count me found"

-Gary Lewis and the Playboys, Count Me In

Robin stared intently at the clock in the Calculus classroom.

3 minutes and 36 seconds until the end of the school week, and, more importantly, until her forum on the Vietnam War.

She had never felt this anxious while at school before. Sure, lunch period always made her feel uncomfortable, what with all of the noise and feeling like everyone noticed that she was sitting alone, and she despised having to sit in classrooms with a bunch of ignorant, arrogant fools. But being at school usually made her feel confident about her abilities. This was a whole different ball game.

2 minutes and 17 seconds.

Robin had been waiting for the end of the school day since it first started. She could hardly concentrate in any of her classes, only raising her hand a few times when she was sure of the answer. She could barely remember what topics were covered, a first for her. Really, the only thing she could remember about the day was passing Teddy Duchamp in the hallway, and the only reason she could remember it was because he had greeted her so loudly and enthusiastically that she dropped all of her books in surprise. He didn't stop walking and talking with his friends to help her pick them up though. Maybe he hadn't noticed?

1 minute and 8 seconds.

The anticipation of starting the forum—and if anyone would show up—was practically gnawing at her insides. Would anyone show up? Would anyone care? She didn't want to get her hopes up, especially after the lack of interest that was shown when she announced it in home room, but she couldn't help but be cautiously optimistic. She was eager to talk about the war and why it was so wrong. Robin desperately wanted someone else to agree with her, to see what she saw. She wanted someone else to care about people on both sides being murdered in the most merciless and brutal of ways.

She felt a small lump rise in her throat at the thought and quickly swallowed it.

5...

4...

3...

2...

1…

DRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIINNNGGGGG!

Robin quickly stuffed her books into her backpack and practically fled the classroom. The next step was fighting against the tidal wave of students rushing towards the exit. She wriggled her way through a pack of rabid football players, dodged around members of the debate team, and almost got hit by an incoming tuba while passing the marching band.

Just as she was about to reach her final destination of her homeroom, she felt someone take a hold of her arm.

Robin came face to face with Diane, who was smiling brightly at her. Her brown eyes, however, betrayed her true emotion: they were wide and refused to make contact with Robin's green ones.

"Hi, Robin!" Diane exclaimed, "I'm so glad I found you!"

Robin raised an eyebrow while pulling her left arm from Diane's grip.

"Oh, are you?"

"Yes," Diane answered, her voice quiet, "I really am."

"What, you need help with some homework or something?" Robin asked shortly.

Diane was intelligent, but she sometimes struggled with schoolwork. Robin could remember sitting down with her many times second semester freshman year in Diane's living room and attempting to help her with geometry. One time, the two of them burst into fits of laughter when Diane declared, "Geometry is just like a circle—it's pointless ." This had led to them firing geometry puns back and forth at each other, including Robin's own lewd one: "What do you call a horny rectangle? An erect angle."

Robin felt a pang of nostalgia at the memory. She remembered when she was more carefree and not so hardened. She also hadn't laughed like that in over 2 years.

"No, I don't need any help," Diane responded adamantly, "I'm doing well so far—"

"After the first week of school," Robin pointed out, rolling her eyes.

"Actually, I was wondering if maybe we could… hang out? Maybe?" Diane asked hopefully, ignoring Robin's comment, "Maybe now, today?"

Robin stared at her in shock, but she could feel her body start to slightly shake, a hollow pit was suddenly carved into her stomach that wasn't there before. Anxiety internally consumed her, but it was the familiar feeling of frustration that overtook her.

"Seriously? Why in the world would you want to hang out with me after all this time?" Robin questioned cruelly, "And why would you when you're so much more popular than me?"

Diane looked at her forlornly, her dark brown eyes filled with sadness. The expression on her face made Robin feel even more anxious—and it made her feel like a shitty person.

"How can you even say that?" Diane whispered, but it felt like her voice was ringing in Robin's ears, "You were my best friend, Robin. I—I miss you, I'd love to spend more time with you before you leave—"

"Were being the operative word," Robin couldn't help but snap, her fingers touching the bump in her nose, "And what good would hanging out do now?"

"Because I miss you, and I know you'll probably end up at Stanford, just like you always wanted," Diane pointed out, irritation seeping into her voice, "And it was you who decided to not be friends anymore, not me."

The pit in Robin's stomach grew deeper. She knew that what Diane said was ultimately the truth. But she knew that owning up to that would lead to her having to explain why she stopped being her friend. And that was far too painful for her.

Robin closed her eyes briefly before reopening them.

"Okay Diane, let's hang out," Robin said sarcastically, "But wait—I have my forum now, so I can't today. What about tomorrow night?"

Diane's face faltered.

"Well, I already have plans tomorrow, there's a 'Start of the Year' party that Sue is throwing—"

"Yeah, that's what I thought," Robin retorted, rolling her eyes, "Too busy with your parties. And I'm sure orders to be there came from on high, your Majesty Martha, not like you can refuse that."

Robin knew as soon as the words left her mouth, she got what she wanted: Diane looked enraged.

While Diane certainly continued to be part of Martha Whittaker's so-called "popular" group, Robin knew that the idea that Diane wasn't her own person who made her own decisions was nothing short of vexing to her. Not to mention, she knew that this went deeper for Diane than Martha: she had an overbearing father and a mother who wanted her to follow in her footsteps and become a housewife. Though Diane had never really known what she wanted to do with her life or had any clear direction, as long as Robin knew her, it had been her direction.

"I can't believe you'd say that!" Diane exclaimed, incensed, "All just because you're jealous that you haven't been to a party since you were 15!"

Robin had to admit that that one stung a bit. Sure, it was her choice to stop going to parties, but it also hurt, just slightly, that she never got invited to them anymore.

"That's not why I said—"

"You know what, Robin? Just forget it," Diane cut her off angrily, although Robin could see tears beginning to well in her eyes, "Why did I even think that you'd want to be friends again?"

Before Robin could say anything, Diane stormed away towards the school's exit. She watched as Diane's dark blonde hair whipped in the wind from the open door and then disappeared.

Robin closed her eyes and leaned her head against the wall, lightly fingering her deviated septum. She could feel the guilt creeping in, and in that moment she felt remorseful for rebuffing Diane. Deep down, Robin knew that Diane had good intentions and was attempting to reach out, but too much time had passed. While she might have been confused at first when Robin stopped speaking to her, her former friend had been able to move on to socialize with Martha's group and various other girls fairly quickly. Besides, Robin needed to look out for herself. She'd get hurt eventually. But even when Martha started to treat Robin like shit in the 6th grade, Diane was always still there for her.

Moments of childhood and early adolescent friendship between them flashed through her mind. The two of them playing jumprope, the two of them gorging on sundaes from the ice cream parlor until they wanted to gag, the two of them braiding each other's hair while arguing if Rick Nelson or Bobby Rydell was cuter, the two of them going to their first party with alcohol freshman year. Diane always encouraging Robin to break out of her shell and socialize. Robin always encouraging Diane that she could do whatever and be whoever she wanted. Robin missed Diane, she really did. But she reminded herself that she did what she had to in order to protect herself.

She took a deep breath to collect herself. She couldn't let this thing with Diane derail the forum. She had been anticipating it all week, and the moment was finally here. People could be waiting for her.

Robin took another deep breath and walked through the open entrance to her homeroom.

The first thing she noticed was that the classroom was arranged differently: instead of facing the blackboard, several desks were pushed together and were facing each other.

The next thing Robin noticed was that there was only one person waiting for her. They locked eyes.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" she couldn't help but exclaim, exasperated.

"Hello to you too, Robin," Christopher Chambers greeted sardonically, "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?"