"We gotta get out of this place

If it's the last thing we ever do

We gotta get out of this place

'Cause girl, there's a better life for me and you"

-The Animals, "We Gotta Get out of This Place"

Robin eyed Chris warily as they stepped out of the school and into the warmth of the sun. To meet up with her for the forum, to give her his bag of chips, and to help her pick up her pencils, those were all one thing. To walk her home, on the other hand?

"Which way to your place?" Chris asked once they reached the sidewalk.

"This way," Robin answered, turning left, "I'm about a mile from here, on Stanton Road."

Chris's face lit up.

"You're right by Middle Rock Park then, huh? Man, I love that place."

Robin gave him a confused look.

"You do?"

"Well, what's not to like?" Chris replied, "It's probably the nicest spot in town."

He made a fair point. Middle Rock Park was a couple blocks from her house. It was the biggest green space in Castle Rock town limits, which wasn't saying much, but it did have a few lush Oregon white oak trees and park benches. Her parents used to take there when she was little, her father pushing her higher and higher on the lone swing set as her mother would smile at them. She was deemed too small for the swing by her parents when she was a toddler, but when her father returned from the Korean War, they took her to the park all the time. Before Vietnam. She touched her fingers to her deviated septum.

"What's wrong?"

Chris's voice startled her out of her thoughts. She glanced up at him, and he was looking at her with concern in his blue eyes.

"Nothing."

It came out much more forceful than she had intended: her tone betrayed her.

"The park means something to you," Chris replied softly but definitively.

He gave her a knowing look. There was a sincerity in his eyes that made her not want to lie to him again.

"Yeah," Robin admitted quietly, "Yeah, it does."

"You can tell me about it, you know."

"Chris, I don't want to talk about it, okay?" Robin sighed.

His eyes bore into her.

"You sure? I think you wanna talk about it, you just don't know it yet."

"I said I didn't want to talk about it, didn't I?" Robin snapped, "I think I would know better than you about what I want."

Again, her anger didn't make him run away or yell back at her. Instead, Chris just shrugged his shoulders.

"Maybe. Maybe not."

And again, he gave her a cryptic reply. They walked for a few moments in silence as she tried to decipher what he meant.

"You know, you have a tell."

"A what?" Robin asked, taken aback by the sudden change in conversation.

"A tell," Chris answered, "Like in poker. You ever played before?"

Robin shook her head.

"I'll teach you sometime. Anyway, in poker, you're trying to keep people from knowing your hand, no matter what it is. A tell is something you do that sort of gives your hand away."

Robin gave him a sarcastic smile.

"So what's my tell, then?"

"You touch your nose," Chris said, "Whenever something's bothering you. Not like 'mad-bothering you,' but when you're upset."

He was right: it was a subconscious habit that she picked up a long time ago. She felt a flicker of irritation, but more than that, Robin was amazed by how much Chris seemed to notice. She smiled with embarrassment.

"Yeah, I guess I do that," Robin admitted, "Very astute, Chambers. I guess I would be a terrible poker player."

"Yeah," Chris nodded and grinned at her, "Yeah, you would be terrible. Godawful, even."

"Well jeez, there's a line between honesty and cruelty, you know," Robin quipped with a laugh.

Chris chuckled.

"That's fair. Well stick with me, and we'll make a card player out of you yet."

"That sounds…fun."

The word felt unfamiliar rolling off of her tongue. Come to think of it, when was the last time she had fun?

Chris gave her an amused smile.

"You're saying it like you're scared of it."

"I'm not scared of it," Robin clarified, running her hand through her hair, "I just—I don't know. I'm just trying to get out of here. I don't have time for it."

"Well, a little fun never hurt anybody," Chris reasoned, "But I get it. I gotta get outta here too."

Robin glanced at him.

"And go where?"

He sighed, but determination was blazing in his eyes.

"Anywhere."

Robin remembered the conversation she overheard between Chris and Mrs. Bradbury about in-state colleges. She could hear Mrs. Bradbury's words in her ears: "You'll have a better chance of getting in, and you may actually be able to go."

"Chris, why does Mrs. Bradbury want you to only apply to state schools?"

"I figured you heard that," Chris said with a wry smile, "And because. Even if my grades are good enough to get in, who's to say I could go to any of those out of state schools?"

"But your grades are good enough to get in," Robin interjected, "They are more than good enough."

He looked almost confused by the compliment.

"Thanks. But at least with the in-state schools, I can feel more sure about going. I have to go to college, and I'm going to go."

Robin knew right away Chris was talking about money, even though he wasn't spelling it out. She had always been so concerned about beating him out academically that she had never stopped to think that he may not be able to go to college at all, let alone a prestigious one, because he couldn't pay for it.

She realized with a sinking feeling that Chris Chambers was so desperate and determined to leave Castle Rock that he didn't care where he went. He just cared about being guaranteed a way out. The injustice of it all made her feel sick.

"That's so not fair!" Robin couldn't help but blurt out.

Chris gave her a look of surprise and confusion.

"You should be able to apply to any school you want to, no matter how much it costs!" Robin explained with indignation, "Where you go to college shouldn't be based on how much money you have! Money shouldn't be limiting your choices!"

"Well, it does," Chris said stiffly, "That's reality."

"But that's not Mrs. Bradbury's choice to make, that's yours! You could at least apply to wherever you wanted to go and see what happens and what you can afford!"

Chris ran a hand through his hair. He looked embarrassed.

"It's not that simple, Robin."

Robin sighed.

"I'm sure it's not simple. I'm sure it's really hard and complicated and…I don't know. But it just doesn't seem fair."

Chris gave her a wry smile.

"Life usually isn't."

"I'm well aware of that," she snapped back, "But it should be. And you should be applying to any college you want to. You could probably even get some scholarships for a few out of state schools, you'd just have to send in paperwork."

Chris rubbed the back of his neck. The look of embarrassment was back.

"Scholarships? I don't know."

"It's not free money, if that's what you're worried about," Robin explained hurriedly, "You work for it with your grades and your test scores."

The idea of earning scholarship money instead of it being given to him seemed to sit better with Chris. He tilted his head with thought.

"Yeah, maybe so. But why does it matter to you where I apply?"

Robin wasn't expecting that question, and she didn't really have an answer except for the indignation she could feel pulsing through her.

"I don't know. I just think that Mrs. Bradbury making that decision for you is wrong. And it's not fair that you should be limited by money when that's not your fault," she answered carefully, looking down at her feet as she walked.

Chris stopped. Robin took a few steps before noticing this, and she turned around to face him. His eyes were unreadable, but the intensity with which he stared at her made her stomach drop.

"Thanks Robin," he said hesitantly, "I'll think about it."

It was like a flashback: she saw herself at 12 years old trying to convince Chris of his better nature and to put the milk money back. "I'll think about it. I promise," he had said. Were her words at all helpful to him?

She looked him in the eye.

"If you really want to get out of Castle Rock like you said, then go all the way. Get out of this shithole and see other states. Shoot, go see the world if you can."

"Trust me, I will," Chris said with determination, "Wherever I'm going, all I know is that I won't be here."

Robin gave him a small smile.

"This isn't easy for me to say, but…you're the other best student at school," she admitted, "Our GPAs are almost the same. I can't have my competition settling for less than what he deserves."

Chris grinned at her.

"Robin, there is no competition…I'm just better than you."

Robin and Chris looked at each other and started laughing.

"You wish you were better than me, Chris Chambers!"

Chris gave her a lopsided smile.

"There's that complete and total honesty again."

"Maybe so," Robin said coyly.

"Well, what about you then?" Chris asked curiously, "Where are you trying to go?"

Robin suddenly had the feeling that she didn't want to tell him, but she didn't know why. Wouldn't he find out eventually along with the rest of Castle Rock?

"Stanford. I'm going to—trying to go to Stanford," she corrected herself.

Chris glanced at her approvingly.

"California, huh?"

Robin nodded.

"Absolutely. It's supposed to be gorgeous out there, and San Francisco seems to have people there who care about what's going on in this country, in the world," Robin said earnestly.

"Yeah," Chris agreed, "I've heard great things about it."

"It's supposed to be a place where people actually care about each other," Robin continued.

"A novel thought," Chris remarked with a grin.

"Seriously though, Chris, it kind of is a novel thought. Everybody in Castle Rock sucks. Nobody cares about anything or anyone but themselves."

"Castle Rock is a shithole, definitely. But that's not true."

Robin looked at him, flabbergasted.

"How can you say that? Everybody here has been so awful!" she exclaimed incredulously, "This whole town is crawling with assholes!"

"I know it is," Chris said with conviction, "But that doesn't mean every single person you come across is one."

His tone filled her with guilt.

"I—I know," Robin stammered in reply.

He had her stumped. It was true: while she thought of most people in Castle Rock as ignorant and sometimes downright malicious, not everybody was so terrible. Wasn't Chris proving that to her now? And she couldn't help but think of Teddy Duchamp, the boy who practically screamed across the cafeteria to ask her to sit with him. The boy who, for whatever reason, sung her praises and thought her using him for her college application was "hot shit."

It was as if Chris could read her thoughts.

"You say everyone in Castle Rock is an asshole, but I saw you sitting with Teddy Duchamp yesterday, in the cafeteria"—Chris gave her a sideways glance— "What's that about?"

"I tutor him in Biology," Robin answered simply.

"And he hasn't run you off yet?" Chris asked sardonically.

"No, he hasn't," Robin replied, and then quickly added, "He's not that bad, you know."

"Hmm."

Robin remembered how Teddy spoke so harshly about Chris, and she wondered if Chris had any idea how Teddy felt about him now. With his instincts, she figured he must.

"You two had a falling out?"

Chris raised an eyebrow. "No, not really. We just drifted apart, I guess. Why?"

Why was she asking him this?

"I don't know," Robin admitted, shrugging her shoulders, "I just remember you guys used to hang out all the time when we were younger. And I don't know—you seemed upset or angry or something when you asked me about him."

A few moments of silence passed with Robin staring at him. As usual, his expression was hard to read.

"I'm not angry," Chris said finally, "I've just heard the stories about how he is now, and I just—I want you to be careful."

"I think I can handle Teddy Duchamp," Robin scoffed, "But thank you for your concern."

"Fine," Chris responded calmly, but he threw her another sideways glance, "But like I said. Just be careful."

"Fine, whatever, I'll be careful. But like I said, he's not that bad," Robin said defensively.

Chris didn't reply, so the two of them continued to walk in silence as they crossed the street. Why was she so defensive of Teddy? Robin looked up at the street sign. They were at the intersection of Washington and Birch: just two blocks away from Middle Rock Park.

"Did you two have a falling out?" Chris asked suddenly.

Robin gave him a puzzled look. "Who?"

"You and Diane McDonald."

Anxiety hit her in the stomach, and she internally panicked.

"Oh," Robin attempted to reply nonchalantly, "That…she was always just more popular than me and had her friends. Martha Whittaker, Suzanne Prewitt, that whole gang. She just went with them instead."

Chris blinked at her. "You know what that sounds like to me?"

Robin looked at him expectantly. "What?"

"A bunch of bullshit."

"Excuse me?!" Robin exclaimed, taken aback and furious, "What do you know about me and Diane?!"

"I know you two used to be best friends all throughout elementary and junior high, all the way up to sophomore year," Chris answered steadily, "And I know she's been nothing but nice to you this year, but you're downright mean to her."

"Well maybe it's with good reason," Robin argued.

Chris gave her a withering look.

"I think whatever reason you have, it's not a good one. If you believe so much in things being fair, you'd treat her a damn sight better."

Robin's mouth opened and closed. She already felt guilty enough with the way she had been treating Diane. She let his words wash over her, and she realized that maybe she was being hypocritical in not being nice to Diane when really, she didn't do anything wrong. But the idea of being close to her again turned her stomach into knots, and as they walked by Middle Rock Park, the knots became tighter. She touched her hand to her nose.

"I think I can make it home from here, it's only another block," Robin said, putting agitation into her voice, "You can go now."

"Robin," Chris sighed, "C'mon. Stop trying to get people to leave you alone."

She froze, and he stopped right beside her. She learned that getting angry turned people away, so she kept doing it. But what she didn't know was that someone else was going to see through it. She had no idea if the fact that Chris knew she was trying to ward people away made her feel understood or absolutely terrified. She just knew her attempts at getting angry with Chris always backfired.

Robin looked back up at him.

"Fine, walk me the one block to my house," she said, rolling her eyes.

Chris grinned at her. "I'm gonna. I'm not gonna tell you I'll do something and then not follow through with it."

Robin smiled softly at his words as they continued walking. "I'll be holding you to that, Chambers."

"I would expect you to."

After a minute or two of silence, they came upon Robin's house and stopped out front. Robin had never considered her house to be extraordinary; it certainly didn't look like any of the houses from The View. She noticed Chris gazing up at her two-story home with a look of quiet wonderment.

"Nice place," Chris remarked wistfully.

The tone in his voice struck a chord with her.

"Thank you," Robin replied sincerely, "And thanks for walking me home."

Chris smiled at her. "Thanks for letting me. I better get going, I'm meeting up with Gordie later."

"Have fun."

"You should come sometime," Chris told her.

Robin gave him a small smile back. "Maybe."

"Hey, that's improvement, I'll take it," Chris chuckled, "I'll see you."

"See you."

She watched Chris walk back the way they came, and with an equal mixture of indignation, panic, and admiration, Robin realized Chris Chambers made her care about him.