Kate's POV
I opened my eyes as I felt myself wake up. The alarm going off from my phone didn't help my nerves. I reached down off the couch and quickly pressed off. I then looked up to see if Rick was still asleep. Last night after grieving together all day in the living room, we had finally laid down, resting our heads next to each others as we fell asleep. The house seemed to grow more and more depressing as the sun went down, turning the living room darker and darker. I wanted to turn on a light once the sunset had illuminated the room somewhat yellow, but my headache wanted it dark. The whole time me and Rick just sat holding each other as the room completely went dark. Still though we could just barely see and eventually laid down on the couch until we were finally out. Rick had seemed to be waiting for someone, as if his parents and Angel were just out and he was waiting for them to come home. They never did though.
"Are you going?" Rick asked. I looked around the room to see that it was a blue tint to it, due to the sunrise. I sighed.
"Yeah… are you sure you don't wanna come?" I asked.
"Yeah…" Rick said. I sighed again and gave his cheek a kiss.
"I'll be right back" I said before standing up. I stretched and then made my way upstairs to brush my teeth and pee. I could have just used the downstairs bathroom but I didn't have my toothbrush down there so I had to make do. I stepped past the bloody clothes again and did my thing. When I was done though I picked the clothes up and put them in the hamper at the end of the hall. As I stepped out of the bathroom though I stopped, getting a glimpse into Angel's room. It seemed so haunted and empty as I stared into it. I shook my head and dropped the clothes off. As I shook my head I realized that I still had an awful headache. I popped two more headache meds in my mouth and then made my way downstairs where Rick had from the looks of it fallen asleep again. Again I sighed and walked out the door, making sure to grab the picture on the way out.
The only car I saw in our usual parking spot was Humphrey's as I pulled in. He was leaning against the trunk as I parked. I turned the car off and hopped out, walking around the back and meeting him.
"No Shaky?" I asked surprised. Humphrey shrugged sadly.
"He said that he might show up, but I don't know… where's Rick?" Humphrey asked.
"He said that he didn't want to come, the last thing he wanted was for people to surround him and apologize" I explained. Humphrey sighed and looked into his hand. It was a photo of him, Angel, and Lilly. From this distance I couldn't tell where they were, but they were happy together and that was all that mattered at the time.
"What did you bring?" Humphrey asked. I held up the photo that Rick picked out yesterday. "Can I see?" He asked. I extended my arm to him.
"Yeah" I said. Humphrey took the photo and studied it.
"It's gonna be so much different without her," Humphrey said as he looked. He then handed it back to me. I accepted it and then studied the expression on his face.
"Where did you stay last night?" I asked.
"I went home, your mom said that I should go home and tell my mother. I assume that she took care of Lilly once I left" Humphrey explained.
"How did your mom take it?" I asked.
"She cried… I comforted her for about an hour before she went out back to smoke and then I went upstairs and… finally had a good cry myself" Humphrey explained. I took a step to Humphrey and wrapped my arms around him. He hugged me back and sniffed as he tried to hold himself together.
"You're not staying here are you?" I asked.
"No… no, no I'm going home after this… you?" Humphrey asked.
"No… I gotta get back to Rick" I said. I broke the hug and brushed Humphrey's face as a tear fell down his cheek. He wiped it and then completely stood up off his car.
"Seeing this locker isn't gonna be an easy task you know" he said. I nodded as I turned to the school.
"Yeah, I know" I said, just before the school bell rang. The school busses started to let kids off then and others began walking to the building. "Let's just… get this over with" I added. Me and Humphrey made our way over, but only made it just past the busses as we were stopped by Salty. He ran over to talk with us, desperately trying to get an answer.
"Kate, Humphrey! What happened?" he asked, his voice getting quieter as he finally reached us. We kept on walking as we talked.
"We still don't know, as far as we can tell the car that they were driving in just lost control" I explained.
"But… is there gonna be a-"
"Yeah but… we don't know when… Rick's still waiting for that call" I said.
"Is that for her locker?" Salty asked. I looked at the photo in my hand, and then ahead again.
"Yeah. for her locker," I answered.
"We were just gonna drop these off and go, why are you here anyway?" Humphrey asked Salty.
"My parents wanted to keep me home but I needed to take the chance to come and talk with you guys. I didn't hear anything about Rick though, is he alright?" Salty asked.
"Physically, yes" I answered. We were now in the building, and had begun making our way over to her locker. Just one problem. I had no clue where it was.
"Uh, do you two know where her locker is?" I asked.
"Yeah, this way," Humphrey answered, taking a left. Me and Salty followed him before resuming our talk. "You could have just texted us you know" Humphrey added.
"Well it just seemed like more of something you say in person is all" Salty explained.
"Well if you want I can take you home after this. You shouldn't be here right now" Humphrey offered.
"If you wouldn't mind," Salty said. The three of us turned the corner and then stopped as we noticed that just down the hall was a small but very noticeable collection of candles, and other things. As we got closer we noticed the other items. Two teddy bears, a picture from the year book of Angel, and others surrounding it, the three of us simply stared at the locker without saying a word. I then noticed a roll of tape on the floor, just behind one of the candles. I leaned over to pick it up, and tore off a piece, handing it to Humphrey and forming it into a roll. I put it on the back of the picture and then put the picture on the locker, just above the yearbook photo. Humphrey placed his just to the left of mine, before placing the tape back behind the candle.
"Did any of you guys ever think that we would be seeing this?" Salty asked. Humphrey shook his head.
"No… never" Humphrey answered. I felt two light taps on my shoulder, making me turn around to see Winter. She had her text books in her hand but looked saddened as she looked at me.
"Kate, I didn't expect to see you here so soon, '' she said.
"Oh well I'm only dropping this off and then… I gotta get back" I explained.
"I'm so sorry, me and the other have tried reaching out to you, has everything been alright?" Winter asked. I shook my head.
"I've been taking care of Rick" I answered.
"Oh my God, poor thing. How is he?" Winter asked. By now I had gotten this question so many times. I should get used to it, I was only gonna get it more and more.
"He's…" I went to say but stopped.
"What?" Winter asked, before realizing that I was looking behind her. She turned around to see that Rick was here, and he was walking over to us. I walked over and met him halfway.
"What are you doing here?" I asked. He looked like a wreck, hair and fur was messy, bags under his eyes. Not to mention he looked as though he had been crying which was obvious.
"I… I needed to- to see you" Rick said. Humphrey and Salty now turned as well, recognizing the voice. Humphrey's eyes widened before he practically ran over to Rick.
"Rick, buddy… I…" Humphrey started but didn't finish. He and Rick only made eye contact before Humphrey threw his arms around him. Rick hugged him back, making me realize that Rick didn't put on a jacket. Spring was right around the corner, yes but… it was still cold out. Rick didn't care I guess. "I'm so sorry about Angel'' Humphrey said as he kept hugging Rick. From the sounds of it he was crying now. Very lightly however.
"What are you doing here?" Salty asked. Humphrey broke the hug and took a step back. Rick looked over at me again. Winter looked as though she wanted to say something but couldn't, she was waiting for Rick to speak first.
"The funeral is tomorrow morning," Rick said. I felt a wave of sadness and heaviness, making me walk over and hug him. He hugged me back tightly for a minute before speaking again. "Is that it?" he asked. I broke the hug and turned around to look where he was staring. It was the locker.
"You don't have to go over there if you don't want to," Humphrey said.
"No I… I should'' Rick said, taking a walk over there. The group followed him and then stopped once they reached the locker. We just waited for Rick to give some type of response. He took a shaky deep breath and then turned to leave. When he did though he came face to face with…
"Garth?" Humphrey said. Rick took a step back from nearly bumping into Garth. Cando stood right behind him.
"Sorry… hey Rick '' Garth said. Rick looked down at Garth's hand to see that he had a flower and quickly put two and two together.
"What the hell are you doing with that?" Rick growled.
"Hey calm down, I'm just… just paying my respects" Garth replied.
"Why?" I asked, making Garth turn his attention to me.
"Man you didn't give a shit about her" Humphrey added, grabbing Garth's attention from me.
"Come on man, I don't know why you wanted to do this dumb shit anyway. I told you it was a waste of time, '' Cando added.
"Go" Rick said, motioning with his head to his left. Garth sighed and looked a bit annoyed now.
"Look man, I just wanted to leave this here and be on my way. Why are you being like this?" Garth asked. Rick at first looked a bit blank, but his expression turned furious as he crept closer.
"Because it's YOU" he said disgustedly. Garth winced.
"Have you been drinking?" he asked.
"None of your Goddamn business" Rick answered.
"Look dude, I get that you don't trust me or anything, I'm not asking you too. But please, just let me put this there?" Garth asked, holding up the flower.
"Garth, why do you care so much dude?" Cando asked. Garth ignored him.
"When my mom died a few years back, it was the same thing. Angel she… she died in a car crash right? My mom went the same way" Garth explained. I looked over at Humphrey who looked back at me, we didn't know what to make of this.
"I don't care, if your father raised you and you came out like this, then it's a damn shame that you lost her when you clearly needed her the most '' Rick spat. Garth lowered the flower.
"Listen… I know your not in a good place right now, but don't fucking talk about my parents, especially my mother that way" Garth said.
"Garth I… I don't know why you care so much but maybe come back-" I started to recommend but Rick cut me off.
"No, fuck him. I don't want his shit here" he said.
"Come on Garth, let's go" Cando said, trying to pull him away but Garth pushed him off lightly. Cando groaned and began walking away.
"Why do you care like that Rick? Its not her grave, it's just a locker. And by the end of the week it will be someone else's" Garth explained.
"If you want to get to this locker you'll have to stab me again" Rick said. I saw Winter tense up out of the corner of my eye. I guess this was my responsibility.
"Rick, you shouldn't be here anyway, let's just get you home" I suggested.
"No. I want this asshole gone, away from my sister's locker" Rick said.
"Whatever man, you're being a fucking asshole" Garth said as he began to walk away.
"I have to be when it come's to you and your fucking family" Rick spat. Garth turned around again.
"What did I fucking say?" he yelled.
"Hey come on dude, just take a step back" Humphrey said, putting his hand out. Garth smacked it away though.
"What did I just say?" Garth repeated.
"Your family has defended you to get you out of a well deserved punishment, tormented my family, and assaulted my sister. Fuck your fucking family" Rick said, getting close. Enough was enough for Garth. The next thing I knew Garth had punched Rick in the face and Rick was down on his knee.
"Stop! Stop!" Winter yelled. Rick went to look up at Garth but was punched again. "Stop!" Winter yelled again. By now the whole school surrounded us. Humphrey actually took me by surprise though when he came up from behind Garth and grabbed his arms to hold him back.
"That's enough man, stop it" Humphrey said as he struggled. I quickly knelt by Rick as he held his face with his left hand.
"Are you okay?" I asked. Rick looked at his hand and studied the little bit of blood on it before wincing in anger. He ignored my question, standing up to take a swing at Garth which knocked him out of Humphrey's grasp, and made him fall on his hands and knees. Rick then ran up and kicked him in the stomach, making Garth roll over on his back. He continued by grabbing Garth by the collar of his shirt and punching him repeatedly. One, two, three times before Humphrey went to grab his attention.
"Rick… Rick!" Humphrey yelled before grabbing Rick and pulling him off of Garth.
"LET GO OF ME! LET GO OF ME!" Rick yelled repeatedly.
"No!" Humphrey yelled back, leaving me to cover my muzzle in shock. Garth rolled over and began to get up, spitting blood on the floor.
"You… are fucking insane" Garth panted. Rick breathed angrily before shaking Humphrey off and going for seconds. I had enough though and threw myself in front of him.
"That's enough Rick, come on" I growled. I spun him around, grabbed his wrist and then basically dragged him out of the school. Humphrey, Salty, and Winter stayed behind to presumably make sure that nothing was messed up. We walked outside and marched over to the cars where sure enough, Rick's truck was parked. "I cant fucking believe you. Why would you start with him?" I asked angrily as I swung Rick against his truck. "He just wanted to pay his respects" I added.
"No, fuck him. He didn't want to pay respects, since when does he care about anybody but himself" Rick growled.
"Rick! Did you not hear him? He lost his mother the same way, he knew your pain, he tried to pay his respects and actually… he's been different towards you…" I explained.
"You don't think that him just changing like that is suspicious at all?" Rick asked.
"I Never said it wasn't. But that in there. That did not have to be a fight. It happened because of you! That back there wasn't you. That back there is not the wolf that I fell in love with!" I yelled. Rick's expression softened, but not because I was getting through to him at all.
"What am I gonna lose you to?" he asked. I paused for a second before groaning.
"Get back home, I'll be right behind you just… get back home" I said, pointing towards the road. Rick said nothing and silently climbed in his truck, turned it on, and then pulled off. I scoffed as I got in my own car. I don't even know how he just beat Garth, he hasn't slept or eaten anything in almost three days… he needs to eat something. I just… I'll pick him something up. I pulled out my phone and began to message Angel.
"Hey, your brother just flipped out and beat on Garth again. I'm gonna pick him something up to eat. Do you want anything?" I typed. I went to press send but as my finger now hovered over the button I stopped. I now just sat in the driver's seat of my car in silence as I looked down at my phone. Why was I… Angel isn't here anymore she's gone… was I so caught up in what just happened? Was I not used to this yet? Or did I just forget? I looked at the last message I sent the last time we texted. "Anytime you want to hang out just let me know okay? I love you too" the text read. I teared up as I read the text until I found myself crying. I wasn't trying to hold it in anymore, I was just crying.
"Kate?" I heard to the left of me. I turned to see that not only did I have the car door open, but Humphrey and Salty were now standing there.
"I… I want Angel back" I sobbed.
"Salty, why don't you wait by my car?" Humphrey asked, turning to him. Salty looked at him, and then to me before walking over to Humphrey's car. Humphrey then walked fully over to me and knelt by the open car door. "We all want her back Kate. we just… we have to get through this though" Humphrey explained.
"I-I know. But I'm just… I'm going about this so wrong" I cried.
"What do you mean?" Humphrey asked.
"R-Rick… I just yelled at him and… I made him feel alone, a-and s-s-sad. I talked to him like he was a stupid mutt" I sobbed. Humphrey looked away from me as if he didn't know what to say. He didn't even bother trying to tell me that I wasn't in the wrong. Good.
"Kate, you have been taking care of him. Sure maybe you had a moment of weakness. But you're still standing strong" Humphrey said. I kept crying as I looked at him.
"I… I have to get back" I said, reaching for the door.
"Wait" Humphrey said, stopping me. "Keep me updated okay? Let me know if you two need anything"
"I will '' I said. Humphrey stepped back, now allowing me to shut the door. I turned my car on and began driving off. I thought again whether or not I should stop and get something. But it was seven thirty in the morning. No one was really open anyway. Right now I needed to get back to Rick and make sure he was okay. I stopped the car just before I got on the main road and wiped my eyes. Now I was good to go. I began driving as fast as I could and made my way back to Rick's house. Again I parked behind his truck and stepped out. I made my way up the steps and tried the door only to realize that it was locked. I sighed and knocked, waiting for an answer. There was none. I knocked again, before ringing the doorbell. I heard shuffling on the other side before finally the door opened up. Rick looked through the crack at me, tears staining his face as his ears were flat.
"Can I come in?" I asked. Rick stepped aside and allowed me to enter. I did. Rick shut the door behind me, and then walked over to the living room. I followed him where he sat down on the couch again and was drinking more alcohol from the cabinet upstairs. I sighed. "Rick, you shouldn't be drinking that," I said.
"I thought you were leaving me, '' Rick said. I felt a small heart ache, even though he clearly wasn't all there right now. I sighed and took the bottle from him.
"No, I would never leave you" I said as soothingly as I could.
"Hey, give me back my booze" he said, reaching for the bottle.
"No. Rick you shouldn't… look at you. Do you think that this is what Angel would want?" I asked. Rick growled.
"What do you… stop talking about her like you knew her like that. Angel isn't even here anymore. She's dead" Rick stumbled, reaching for the bottle again. There's no way that he just started drinking. He must have started when I left this morning. I'm a fucking idiot for leaving him.
"Rick stop" I said as I moved the bottle out of his reach. "What do you mean to stop acting like I knew her like that?" I asked.
"You're just… you're talking like you knew her for sixteen years, that's all" Rick said. This enraged me, making me lose just a bit of myself. I slapped him across the face, making the room feel even more heavy than it already was. Rick stared up at me, with a tear in his eye. I now felt extremely guilty, realizing what I just did. We stared at each other for a long, long time. Until finally Rick reached for the bottle once more, did he even realize what just happened?
"Rick no!" I yelled, moving the bottle yet again.
"But… you don't love me anymore," Rick muttered. I burst into tears again and hugged him tightly. Rick stumbled back into the couch as I cried.
"No… I'll always love you… I'm so sorry" I cried. It hadn't even been three minutes and I regretted what I had just done. Hell, I regretted it the second I did it. Me and Rick had never fought before right now, but this…
"I-Im sorry too Kate" Rick said, beginning to sob himself.
"No… we cant let this tear us apart like this… we have to get through it, we can't…" I started but just ended up with me crying. Rick simply held me as I cried. I just felt so bad… I felt really, really bad. This wasn't us. We loved each other, but now it just seemed like… "we can't let this tear us apart" I repeated. Rick continued holding me, before finally planting a soft kiss on my neck. He kissed my neck only because of how far my muzzle was on his shoulder.
"I… I won't let anything come between us Kate, I promise… I'm sorry. Just please don't leave me. Pleeaase don't leave me Kate" Rick sobbed.
"I'll never leave you Rick I promise… I know you would never hurt me" I said, remembering me saying the exact same thing when he took my virginity. I trusted him, even in this state. But everything building up… we needed to use this to bring us closer, not to tear us apart. I wasn't gonna let that happen.
"I love you Kate" Rick said, pulling me in even tighter.
"I love you too" I sobbed. Rick loosened his grip for a second, allowing me to slide out of his grasp. I grabbed his hands though and sat on the ottoman across from him as we now sat across from each other. His hands trembled and just as they had for the past few days, they felt extremely weak as they shook. "Rick… you need to eat something" I said. Rick shook his head.
"No… I cant" he said.
"Please… you have to. At least do it for me" I begged. Rick simply shook his head again. I sighed and then pulled his hands close to me to pull him into another hug. Rick shook in my arms as I held him, before laying him down on the couch. As I now looked down at him he looked as though he was gonna pass out. That alcohol was gonna knock him out. I felt another wave of guilt as I rubbed his cheek. The one that I just slapped. I can't believe I hit him, the love of my life. What is wrong with me? I found myself disgusted. Rick just lost his entire family and was going through God only knows what, and he made one drunkenly smart comment and I slapped him for it… never again. My God never again, that wasn't me… I would never… I began tearing up again as Rick fell out. "Sleep well" I teared up, giving his cheek a soft kiss. Hopefully he was so drunk that he wouldn't even remember this. I didn't take Rick as a drinker, but I guess he wasn't… then again that wasn't me five minutes ago either. But that wasn't me…
I stood up and walked over to the dining room to call my mom. I needed her advice right now. I dialed her up and put the phone to my ear as I listened to the dial tone. She picked up only after two rings.
"Hello?" she said.
"Hey mom, can we talk?" I asked.
"Of course sweetie of course, is everything alright?" mom asked.
"No mom no, everything is not alright. We went to the school today and Rick and Garth got in another fight. Garth was trying to leave something at Angel's locker but Rick didn't want him too" I explained.
"Why not?" mom asked.
"Because it was Garth," I said.
"Okay, is that all?" mom asked. I sniffed before continuing.
"No, I got mad at Rick and yelled at him to go home. And then if that wasn't bad enough I fucking hit him" I cried.
"You… you hit Rick?" mom asked.
"Uh-huh" I sobbed.
"Rick?" Mom asked, surprised.
"Yes!" I answered.
"Why? Why would you hit him? What happened?" mom asked. I sobbed as I looked over at the poor wolf asleep on the couch.
"He was drunk again, he must have drank when I left, and then I was talking to him about Angel and he got mad with me, he said that I barely even knew her… so I… so I slapped him. I don't know what I was thinking, I held him right after, apologizing to him but… I still feel awful" I explained.
"Where is he now?" mom asked.
"Sleeping" I said.
"Kate, you know how much he loves you. Why would you ever in a million years-"
"I WOULDN'T! I mean… mom it's so hard" I cried. Mom stayed silent for a moment before I called to her. "Mom?" I called.
"Why don't you two just come here? I've been telling you this from the start, just come here and let me take care of you two" mom said.
"No, Rick said that he doesn't want to leave here" I answered. Mom sighed.
"He may have said that but you don't know it… at least do this" mom began. "Poor that alcohol down the drain, he doesn't need it. I never thought that he would stoop to such a level but after what happened I can't even blame him. Just get rid of it and don't leave his side and believe me you will be more than enough to comfort him if he loves you like I know he does" mom explained. I nodded.
"Poor it down the drain? Alright… I'll do that" I said.
"Okay, do it now. I'll message you later okay?" mom said.
"Alright. I love you mom" I said.
"I love you too honey. And listen, I know you blame yourself. But remember that your going through it too. I know you two would never hurt each other" mom said.
"Thanks mom… oh mom" I said.
"Yeah?" mom answered.
"The… the funeral is tomorrow" I said.
"What time? And where?" mom asked.
"I don't know… when Rick wakes up I'll ask" I said.
"Okay… I love you" mom replied.
"I love you too… bye" I said. I heard the three boops as mom hung up the call and sighed, taking another look at Rick. I had to get rid of the fucking booze. I spent the next half hour walking up and down the stairs, clearing out the liquor cabinet in Rick's parents room, pouring it down the kitchen sink, and then putting the bottles in a trash bag, before throwing the bag outside. Once all was said and done I took my position on the couch, laying on the other end and resting my head next to Rick's as we now both lay on the L shaped couch. It wasn't long before I too fell asleep next to him.
When I woke up Rick was still there, except he was awake. I groaned as I turned on my stomach to face him.
"Hey" I said, scratching behind his ear.
"Hey," Rick replied. He turned to face me but I could just barely see him because of the darkness of the room.
"You okay?" I asked.
"No… my head is killing me" Rick replied.
"Hmm" I hummed in a kind of aww-like sound, and kissed his head. In the darkness I could see Rick's eyes close as he relaxed. I then put my forehead on his and sighed.
"Remember we used to do this a lot? What happened?" Rick asked. I giggled lightly.
"We moved onto bigger and better things," I said. I lifted my head up and looked at him. He smiled lightly as he looked up at me.
"I'm sorry about how I've been lately," Rick said.
"Oh Rick… don't apologize, this isn't easy on any of us but you… I can't imagine how you feel" I replied. Rick reached up and rubbed behind my ear, making me exhale and nuzzle his hand. I felt as if his touch hadn't died down, I still loved it. "I Wish I could make this all go away" I added. Rick sighed.
"You're doing your best," he replied.
"My best sucks," I said back. Rick chuckled. I never thought that I would hear that chuckle again.
"Your best is just fine," he said. We got lost in each other's eyes for a moment, before I leaned down to meet his lips. Rick relaxed and accepted my kiss, letting my tongue in his mouth as I licked around. I closed my eyes blissfully as I licked. Myself and Rick moaned as we made out gently on the couch until Rick groaned, looking to his left to break the kiss.
"Sorry" I said. I got away from him and sat up, feeling ashamed of myself once again. It's like all I could ever think of was sex. I'm so fucking disgusting, my behavior today was just… sick. It wasn't right.
"Kate?" Rick said. I turned around to look down at him again.
"Yeah?" I said.
"Could you… bring me some headache pills… maybe a bottle of water?" Rick asked.
"Of course Rick, of course, '' I said. Immediately I got up and turned the living room light on, making Rick wince and shut his eyes. "Sorry" I apologized.
"It's okay, keep it on," Rick said. I ran upstairs and grabbed the bottle, and then ran back downstairs and across the dining room to get to the kitchen. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and then went back to Rick. he sat up and accepted both pills and the water bottle. He swallowed them and then drank just over half of the bottle.
"You're probably dehydrated," I suggested.
"Maybe" Rick said, checking his phone. He then sighed sadly as he rested back into the couch.
"What?" I asked.
"The funeral… it won't be long" Rick said. I looked at my phone to see that we had slept until ten o'clock. I had also missed a message from mom reminding me to ask her about the funeral, as well as asking me how everything was going.
"When is the funeral?" I asked.
"Eight. If you're telling the others then it's the cemetery just off the parkway" Rick explained. I nodded and messaged my mom as well as the group chat. Hopefully everybody would be there. Once that was over I put my phone down and turned to Rick again.
"Hey… do you remember earlier? Anything?" I asked. Rick sighed.
"Yeah… I remember what happened with Garth, I remember driving home and… drinking…" Rick explained.
"Are you mad at me?" I asked.
"No… no Kate I could never be mad at you. I love you, plus I deserved it" Rick said. I wonder if he was talking about the yelling, or if he even remembered the slap. I really wish that I didn't.
"Rick… you don't deserve any of this… no one does. I just want to get through this, and tomorrow… tomorrow is gonna be hard, you know that right?" I asked. Rick looked away from me and down at the couch. He did this for a while before finally replying.
"Yeah… yeah I know… I just… I want my sister back… my Parents… I want them back, I never even got to say goodbye" Rick said, beginning to cry again. So many tears, I don't know how any of us had anything left. I got up and moved closer to him, laying him down on the couch again where I ran my hand down his soft face to calm him.
"Shhh, I know…" I cooed.
"She… she must have been so scared" Rick went on. I just kept rubbing him.
"Shhh. I'm here… I'll take care of you… I won't leave you either I promise" I said softly.
"I love you," Rick sobbed.
"I love you too, just relax okay? I'm here" I said. Rick hugged me as best as he could as he cried softly. I didn't deserve him, after the shit I pulled today he deserves someone better. Not me, I was just a rude, horny tramp. But I couldn't think about these things and feel sorry for myself. I had to be there for him, the sad part was just that he probably felt as though I was his best option. I wasn't. In fact I felt as though I was extremely far from it. But I loved him and right now I wanted nothing more than to be with him, to be close with him, to care for him like he did me. I felt as though that if I were in his shoes, he wouldn't have taken way better care of me than I was doing with him. We stayed here for the better part of three hours, before simply laying on the couch again and relaxing. As best as we could anyway. We didn't fall asleep, we just laid there on the couch, our heads next to each others again, this time though we held hands. We never let go even after hours until the sun came up and it was time to go. This is gonna hurt…
The morning spring air was cool, and the sun which had just come up was casting that early morning orange light as the smell of morning dew filled the air. Its all I smelled the whole way there as we made our way to the cemetery. We were silent the whole way there, not saying a thing to each other. When we finally did pull in we saw other cars there already including my mothers. The others were hearses which had already put the coffins where they needed to be. We stepped out once the car was parked and crept closer to the scene. As we did however the sound of cars coming close grabbed our attention. Me and Rick turned to see Humphrey's car as well as Shaky's.
They stepped out, showing that not only was Humphrey in the car, but his mother was as well. I turned to my mothers car to see my mom, dad, and sister stepping out. I turned to Rick again who still had his eye on the coffins. The others walked over to us, mom getting the first opportunity to try and say something. She didn't get far until she simply pulled Rick into a hug. She cried as she rocked him from side to side, not managing to get a word out. Rick eventually did hug her back, and when they broke it the others were there to take their turn.
Humphrey stood back trying to hold himself together, as Lilly was already crying. Throwing her arms around Rick and hugging him as well. The next one was Shaky, who had stepped to Rick and looked as if he wanted to say something. But it just led to another hug. Finally, even my dad gave Rick a hug. Telling him that he was sorry and that he had a place if he needed it. When he broke his embrace I held my hand out to Rick, offering guidance in what would be the hardest part of our lives. Rick accepted it and together as a group we made our way over to the coffins which were all ready to be lowered. The most disturbing part was the slightly smaller one in the center of the three. Not that it wasn't already obvious with the gravestones just in the back of the coffins.
Rick seemed to take a single step from the group as he looked down at them. Looking left, right, and then at the center again. We said our goodbyes, it was hard but we did it… some of us couldn't hold it together but in the end it was done. There was only one thing left to do… just before the coffins were lowered after the prayer was said, Rick took something out of his pocket that glistened in the morning sun. It took me a second to realize that it was Angel's locket. I thought of its meaning again and almost broke down. Rick's lip quivered for a moment before he tossed the locket down on top of his sister's coffin. It was only right after that they started to be lowered, slowly giving us the time and emotion to say goodbye all over again.
Lilly broke down, almost kneeling over to cry, making RIck pull her in to cry with her. I turned to Humphrey who was watching from about four feet away, trying to hold it together, and Shaky who stood right next to me, crying silently. I took the moment to pull him into a one arm hug, and watched as finally all three were lowered and it was time to go…
We love you Angel. Wherever you are please don't forget that.