When another ripple was finally felt against his hand he smiled and pressed a kiss to the soft skin of her belly.
"Hello little one, My name is Severus and I'm going to be your Daddy"
And Hermione wept.
If she'd thought Severus had been protective before, she'd been entirely wrong. If she wasn't so amused by it , it would have been intensely annoying. He was almost overbearing in his protectiveness, and Hermione secretly thought to herself that if he'd been allowed to wrap her in cotton wool, he literally would've done. As it was, every time they went out he insisted that she "insulate" herself with the thickest clothing she owned, even though it was barely cold enough to require a coat at all
Instead of calling him out on it, Hermione pretended she didn't notice when he cast subtle wards and protection spells behind her back as she walked about the house. Whatever made him happy.
They had managed to explain to both Rose and Scorpius that Hermione was expecting a baby, and it had gone as well as it could have done really…explaining such a thing to two toddlers, though there had been a few horrifying minutes of backtracking when both children had thought Hermione had actually eaten a baby for it to get into her tummy, but once that little misunderstanding was cleared up, much to Severus's combined horror and amusement, both children were happily back to their crafts, each now intent on making 'gifts' for the baby.
It took an extremely long day and most of the night to put their modified plan into words and then onto paper. They were both so organised, that having to change their well made plans irked the pair of them, but it was only when in the middle of something that was more than a heated conversation but not yet quite an argument, that Severus sat down beside her mid-tirade, and rested his hand upon her barely there bump and rubbed soothing circles, an unconscious gesture that he did so without even pausing in his diatribe or ceasing the gesticulation of his other hand he was using to emphasise his point. The tenderness of the unconscious gesture melted away almost all of the anxiety she was holding and she found herself capitulating instantly, while smiling at him fondly. She should perhaps be concerned by the fact that she had no idea what she'd just agreed to, but in that moment she couldn't find it in herself to care. Instead, she grabbed him by the front of the shirt and pulled him into a kiss that left their toes curling.
"Take me to bed Severus"
He looked at her in one of those moments of boyish confusion that never ceased to amuse her in this taciturn man.
"We're already in bed"
Laughing fondly and kissing him once more, so his fragile ego knew she was laughing with him and not at him, she spoke into the kiss.
"And whatever will you do with me , now that you've got me here? Wicked man"
The confusion was gone, replaced by a sinful smirk that made her knickers wet as he prowled over her like a big cat, using his much larger frame to pin her to the bed before his eyes widened and he lifted his weight from her.
"It won't-"
"It will not hurt the baby" she assured him, correctly guessing the reason for his reticence and hooking her legs around his waist to pull him back down to her.
They could both feel her bump between them, but it wasn't hindering them just yet.
"You best make the best of my tits in this position Severus, in a few weeks you'll only be able fo fuck me from behind "
He responded as he always did when she was so forward, his cheeks instantly alighted with a bashful blush but it didn't stop him from doing exactly as she asked with gusto and she felt his cock twitch between her thighs even as he groaned and ripped her top from her body.
Since she'd discovered he had enough upper arm strength from the defined shoulder muscles built over years of lifting heavy cauldrons and many hours of brewing and duelling, that he was strong enough to literally rip the clothes from her body, it was an act she'd begged of him so often that he now did it unthinkingly. So when she told him to make the best of her tits he'd simply torn her shirt apart like it was made of paper and fell upon her breasts. Thankfully he was considerate enough to fix her clothes with a quick reparo when their lovemaking was done, otherwise she wouldn't have much of a wardrobe left. She didn't mind though, in fact she'd often thought she wouldn't have been surprised if she felt her ovaries physically wake up at the sight of him doing something so domestic as repairing clothes.
It didn't take long of his attention at her breast for her to be writhing and soaking beneath him. When she arched into him, he slipped down her body and her knickers were subject to the same treatment and he pulled the scant cloth away as though it offended him and promptly buried his face between her thighs.
And Merlin but he was so good at this. Not only was he extremely talented and had the determination to see it through, but one of the most erotic things about it was he seemed to enjoy himself as much, if not more so than she did, each time he performed this act for her.
As it was, he was buried between her thighs, all sharp angles and sharper tongue and she was arching below him like a bowstring pulled taught. Thankful for the sound dampening wards around the room, as she was certain by now she would have woken the street, let alone the children.
It excited him to no end, her arousal, and he seemed intent on always wringing as much pleasure from her as he could before he got his own end.
He moaned into her cunt, his tongue and actions not shy at all, even though she knew if she looked at him now he'd blush and hide his eyes with his hair. Instead, she made sure to let him know through her actions, how much she enjoyed this…enjoyed him. She arched and pressed into him, moaned, writhed and even screamed, holding nothing back as he quickly pleasured her until she reached her peak, the damn inside her bursting as sensation flooded her limbs and she was left sweating and swearing on the bed. It was at this point he'd hover over her, still hesitant, he'd never once penetrated her without asking first, no matter how many times she'd assured him that he needn't ask for permission every time they made love. By now though, she knew this hesitation was deep rooted and instead of calling him out on it, she simply pulled him down on top of her and smiled when he reached down with a hand to guide himself inside, after fumbling for a moment.
She kissed him then, when his body was covering hers from head to toe, and though he was as hard as she'd ever seen him, and had pleasured her with a heated furiosity, when he entered her he'd sighed into her kiss and set up a slow and leisurely pace that was quickly stoking the embers of her arousal to a pleasant burn once more.
Mostly their couplings, though filled with emotion, were fast and frenzied as they chased their release together, both of them in their own way trying to ensure he reached his peak within her.
Now however, that urgency seemed to have seeped out of him and he raised himself on his arms above her.
He was thrusting leisurely, but shallowly, not quite using the full length of his cock and she wondered why, in the moments when she was able to form a cognizant thought at least. Though as the minutes ticked by and he carried on fucking her leisurely, unhurried and eyes fixated on watching her pleasure, she finally allowed herself to relax into it and as time went on she was soon clawing at his back and begging him to thrust just a little deeper so she could finish.
After a moment's hesitation, he did so, and though something felt a little different she was hurtled into pleasure just the same. Moments after she released around him, he reached down between them and withdrew for just a moment, before thrusting back into her quickly and deeply and finding his own release and emptying himself within her moments later with a deep moan that made her shiver.
Both still panting, he quickly tried to stash something in his bedside drawer, but Hermione caught his wrist before he could.
"What's this?"
She had a good idea, in fact she was certain, the second he'd tried to hide it. But she wanted him to talk to her about it, and not try and hide it away. She was curious how he'd come to make that decision frankly, with how shy he was, as absurd as it was to think of him in those terms.
True enough, his face alighted with a blush, but she cupped his cheek gently and waited, not pushing him any further.
"I'm not mad Severus, just taken a little by surprise as I wasn't expecting it"
His face dropped for a moment then, as a sudden realisation came across his face. "I shouldn't have done anything new without asking, I'm sor-"
She stopped him with a kiss. "I would appreciate a heads up in future if you want to introduce any toys into the bedroom, but it was lovely as always Severus and I don't mind, truly. I just want to know your thoughts on this, and why you think you need it? I enjoy our time together, and you've never left me wanting, so what made you buy a cock ring? "
His blush darkened at her using the term, and she had to fight the urge not to giggle at the look on his face, but it would certainly not have helped in this moment, so she held her amusement back just the same.
"I was tired of our couplings being so quick…I don't intended to use it every time, it would not do to become reliant on it, but after everything that's happened lately, everything you've done for me, everything you've given me, I increasingly felt the need to truly make love to you…without the rush"
Warm affection flooded her then, and she pulled him into her embrace and kissed him slowly and thoroughly, leaving no doubts in his mind of her feelings towards him.
"I love you, and thank you for being so thoughtful, but you know I'm happy with our sex life, you please me like no other lover ever has, and I don't want you feeling like you need to do this for my sake? I hope our trip to the store the other day, didn't give you any wrong impressions, because that wasn't my intention at all"
Returning the kiss leisurely, he pulled her until she was pillowed on his chest. "I know witch, I know you would never ask this of me, but would it be selfish to say that I did this for me and not for you? Because I wanted to give you that, to do that for you?"
Smiling, she pressed a kiss to his pectoral and ran lazy circles with her hand on his belly.
"No, not at all. I understand Severus, truly I do. But what made you think of that in the first place?"
He seemed to ponder his answer before speaking, and answered quietly.
"I didn't have that solution in mind.. I had nothing specific in mind, per say. But after we visited the store, I went back alone. I wanted to see if the muggles had a solution, that the wizarding world did not"
~ O ~
He walked into the muggle adult store, and tried his best not to be shocked at what he saw, and even had to employ occlumency at one point because he simply couldn't believe the array of…things… that were on display.
When Hermione had said she'd wanted to buy an adult toy, he'd initially been a bit upset, but he'd allowed her to explain, before his thoughts could overcome him and he was glad he had. It wasn't that she didn't want to be intimate with him, but that she wanted to keep being intimate with him even when her advanced pregnancy would prevent them from coupling in the usual way, and she'd rather purchase something now before she needed it, but while they were still living on the muggle side, before their move to the cottage. As she didn't fany travelling to muggle london whilst 7 or 8 months pregnant. So with that thought in mind he'd accompanied her into town for some shopping and other tasks, while Arthur happily watched the children. He had entered the store , but had waited for her in the reception area, not going behind the beaded curtain so to speak, into the age-restricted back room. He'd been afraid she might find a fancy toy that left him lacking in comparison but his fears of inadequacy were put to rest when instead of some impressive fake, she'd returned with a small vibrating bullet that fit in the palm of his hand and intrigued him immensely and a kit to make a latex replica of his own… well. He'd blushed when he read the box , but still managed to arch an eyebrow at her. She'd given him a cheeky smile and patted his crotch fondly, which made him cough then smile in amusement. Still , it made him strut a bit on the way home, that over a store full of options she'd still chosen him.
Growing up in the 70s his sex education had been somewhat…lacking, and it wasn't until he was well into his twenties that he found out women actually masturbated too. Combine that with his general lack of partners, his past trauma and spending most of his adult life in a boarding school, it was fair to say that his knowledge of muggle sexscapades was pretty poor. He knew adult shops and toys existed, but had little knowledge on what was available, other than the fact that women often used phallus shaped toys to pleasure themselves…when he entered the adult store himself for the first time, he wasn't quite expecting…this.
If there was one thing he'd not been self conscious about in his life, it was the size of his appendage, but staring at some of the giant phalluses on the shelf in horror, along with others shaped like fists and cones he thought to himself that they surely must be display models because he was sorely lacking in comparison, and staring at in combined horror and fascination at a phallus that was made of bright red material and easily the length of his arm and girth of his thigh… no one could fit that…anywhere, surely?
"Are you interested ? They're 10% off today" The owner of the shop, he presumed, approached him.
Jumping back from the giant phallus as though burned, his eyes widened in shock that the item was indeed for sale, and the man thought he was a genuine buyer for it, before he sputtered out an indignant reply, face flaming.
"Good gods no, this is my first time in one of these establishments and I just … couldn't believe that such a thing existed and was… wanted?"
After a moment's pause he looked at the man in horror. "Do I look like a man who'd want something like… that?"
He had nothing against homosexual men, or the LGBTQ community, and had counselled a number of students who were struggling with their orientation and gender identity, however the past trauma with his father had cut him deep. His father frequently called him a sissy boy and had mocked his long hair, and though he had no problem with the idea of being gay, it was the fact that he'd grown up feeling dirty, as though he were stained and marked by the abuse he'd received. He felt so out of place and wrongfooted , that the man's question had brought up old fears and insecurities that he was somehow marked by the experience and people could see it on his face.
"I'm sorry, I meant no offence but.." he'd quickly added with another glance at the monstrous toy , when noticing the man's pride tattoo and the ring on his the man seemed to understand his reaction, and smiled softly, as though he truly did understand.
"My bad, and it's all good, I didn't mean to presume, just caught you looking at it. It takes all sorts you know? I mean this type of toy has a very small market, and in fairness yeah it's usually guys, but there are plenty of guys who don't use toys at all. Funnily enough the last one of these sold to a real sweet redheaded lady, she was literally 5ft tall and 50 years old and was thrilled with it,though I'd say of all the biggest ones sold, half go for gag gifts or pranks on coworkers and the like, so it's always worth an ask if there's a chance for a sale, nothing personal at all"
Taking a breath of relief he nodded in thanks and understanding. Before arching his eyebrow at the mention of gag gifts. He knew what Hooch was getting for Christmas at the very least, the flying instructor would definitely see the funny side of… it.
"So since this is your first time here, is there any way I can help you? Or are you just here to browse?"
He felt his face flame and though every instinct told him to bolt out the door, he steeled himself with occlumency instead, before regarding the man before him. He scanned the surface of his thoughts, not enough to be intrusive, or blur personal lines, but just enough to get a feel of who the man was as a person. His main fear being that the man only cared about pushing a sale, and would say or do anything to get him to empty his purse. Though he was surprised when he skimmed the surface of his mind that he sensed a genuine warmth about him, along with fleeting concern and empathy for Severus's own well being, after his reaction earlier. All round he was as they would say, a 'good guy'. So Severus decided to be honest with him.
Before he could speak though, something seemed to click in the man's mind, he felt the residual feeling of a thought coming together before the man smiled at him and clapped him on the arm.
"I was about to grab my lunch break , so why don't I flip the sign to closed to give us some privacy and we'll have a cuppa and a chat where we won't be disturbed" .
Sighing in relief he nodded and thanked the man for the offer. It was bad enough the thought of having to discuss his inadequacies with someone else, but the thought of doing so in front of the 24" King Kong Kock next to him, where anyone could just walk in and see and hear them, was mortifying. When the man offered to speak privately, he grasped the offer like a lifeline.
Thankfully the staff room was rather bland and generic in comparison to the rest of the store, and it was no different, he imagined at least, than the staff room of any basic retail store. The man made them both a cup of tea, and grabbed himself a sandwich, offering Severus one out of politeness though he declined. The man sat drinking his brew and eating his sandwich while he introduced himself properly as Devon, and his relaxed and easy manner put Severus at ease, and he was grateful to this muggle for going out of the way to help a stranger.
"I am engaged to be married. My fiance, and my stepchildren of course, they are everything to me. I have a lot of…trauma in my past and my bedroom performance with my fiance is somewhat…unreliable. She says she is happy, and I believe her to be sincere but I would like to be able to offer her …more. I wondered if you had anything to remedy the situation.. Temporarily at least"
Devon nodded along and when he finished speaking he took a sip of his tea.
"There are a number of possibilities for sure, but I want to make sure we're on the same page. Firstly can you get an erection?"
Face flaming at the man's bluntness, he was at least thankful for the clinical and impersonal way he spoke. If the man had asked him about his 'boner' or some other genital related slang, he'd have bolted. As it was, he nodded but before he could continue to speak Devon raised a hand to stop him.
"Let me get these out of the way first. Can you or do you ejaculate?"
Again he nodded. "I appreciate you wished me to wait, though this is pertinent to your last question, I can ejaculate but due to an infection in my… youth… I am sterile"
Devon nodded, and continued. "Any pain when you get an erection, or orgasm. Either in your penis itself, testicles or prostate?"
Shaking his head in the negative, he did his best to give all of his attention to his tea cup.
"Last question. Other than the infection you mentioned already, have you had any past or current serious injuries to your genitals? By that I don't mean just getting a football in the balls," Here he gave a smirk that made Severus chuckle. "But rather anything that would be considered a serious injury. Anything that caused you to urinate blood, or altered the shape of your shaft when erect, testicular torsion, anything like that?"
"I suffered some…physical trauma in the war… but nothing as you described that caused genital bleeding or permanent change"
Nodding, Devon spoke once more. "Thank you for answering honestly. I get that these questions are pretty personal, but the reason for asking them is because first and foremost I am not a doctor. I wanted to rule out as many potential medical reasons for your situation before I agreed to speak to you further about potential solutions for this. I am not qualified to , nor am I going to attempt to give anyone medical advice or a reason not to go to the doctor when it's needed. But you seem the honest sort, and I'm confident you're being truthful with me, if not a little guarded"
Sitting back he cocked his head as though assessing before motioning for Severus to speak. "So tell me what you feel the problem is, and what sort of solution you're hoping for"
Taking a deep breath, Severus spoke. Though couldn't meet the man's eyes as he did so.
" Because of my past occupation , I have not had many partners. My role and history prevented such, so I am not that experienced in the physical side of things and before I began the relationship with my fiance, I had honestly thought that because of the amount of injuries I'd sustained that the physical function was lost to me. Self-pleasure was the last thing on my mind, and the longer I went without any bodily reactions… I assumed that it was simply no longer a part of my life. Then my fiance entered my life and that all changed"
He couldn't help but smile softly to himself, and he heard the warmth in Devons reply.
"You found the one?"
He nodded in agreement. "She is everything to me"
Devon made a gesture for him to carry on, so he did.
"My fiance is younger, 18 years or thereabouts. But I swear she's more mature than I am. I still don't know exactly what endeared her to me, I'm a caustic and miserable bastard at the best of times and I certainly don't have the looks, but she loves me all the same, unbelievable though that may be. I'd say we have an adequate bedroom life…but my performance is somewhat lacking."
Devon didn't interrupt him and for that he was thankful, just nodded and moved his hand in a " go on" gesture.
"At first my nerves got the better of me, sometimes I couldn't get an erection at all, or I'd lose it quickly. We have worked on it together though and hopefully that is a problem of the past. The issue now though is that I have so little experience, and she is so very…wonderful, that I have little self control"
"So you'd say your issue wasn't actually getting or maintaining an erection, but premature ejaculation?"
He was certain he was blushing to his roots, but he nodded along all the same.
"Indeed"
Cocking his head in an assessing way , he finally spoke and his words were calm and guarded.
"I could talk to you about performance enhancers and numbing lube and various other things, but I'll be honest for the most part they're a gimmick and rely heavily on the placebo affect. No, I think a cock ring would work best for you, short term, it is as simple as it sounds, a ring that goes around the base of the shaft and testicles and the mild pressure helps to restrict blood flow helping you maintain an erection and hold off ejaculation. Though these aren't something that should be relied upon long term, or for every situation, but I think if occasionally you just want that little bit longer, I think they're the best solution. I can tell you're a smart man, and though the name is rather gauche It's a physical or mechanical solution as it were, rather than a chemical one, which I think you'd appreciate?"
Nodding in relief he let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. "Yes, thank you. How do I go about purchasing one of these, and do they come with instructions?"
With an easy smile Devon continued. "I'll demonstrate how they work on one of our models, and then we just need to get you the right fit"
He must have seen the sudden fear and dismay in his gaze because he was suddenly serious when he spoke. "You check the sizes yourself, I don't need to touch or see you, I don't even need to be in the same room, and you don't need to "try before you buy" I just ask that you be honest. It's important we get the right fit for you, too big and it won't work but if you go too small it can cause issues… Not making any assumptions but most guys can judge pretty well with their hands, what size they are, know what I'm saying?"
He did indeed. He wasn't a lonely and hormonal teenager anymore, but he was certainly familiar with his own anatomy enough to get the right size.
"Before we go grab your stuff, Feel free not to answer me, but this past trauma and injuries you spoke of, were you a soldier? You mentioned the war earlier."
Did he? He hadn't realised he'd let that slip, but before he could reach for his wand to obliviate the man, he realised that the muggles had been busy with their own conflicts, and while Severus had assumed he'd almost let slip about the wizarding war, this muggle problem assumed he'd been speaking about something to do with the middle east.
" Yes… I was a soldier"
"I ask not just because you mentioned the war, but I'd already thought as much. My husband was in the army. And you remind me of him. How you walk, you mannerisms. I don't mean to offend but you walk into a room and check every corner as though you expect someone to be lying in wait, and for the longest time he did the same. He was captured, they did stuff to him that he didn't think he'd survive and I didn't think I'd get him back. You don't seem like you were frontline though?"
"Intelligence… I was a spy, a double agent."
It was the truth, after all .
"You were tortured?"
He sniffed, but answered.
"Yes."
"I get the feeling a lot of your trauma was from before then though."
"Yes"
"Your childhood?"
He didn't answer, but his look of warning said it all. Devon didn't press any further, instead he grabbed a notepad and pen and wrote him a name and number down.
"Do what you want with this, throw it in my face if you like, and I apologise for presuming. But my Husband, we had a lot of the same issues you're speaking of when he came back from the war. That and more besides. He was angry, and a lot of that anger turned inward. I've heard it said that sex is 90% mental and I believe it. You might be surprised how much just having someone to talk through things with, can make a difference. She's good, and she's experienced with soldiers and what they've been through."
His first instinct was to snarl, sneer and spit out a caustic response. Put up all the defences he'd built but then he thought of Hermione, of Rose and Scorpius and the child that now sat in Hermione's womb. He thought of who he'd been for years, and who he desperately wanted to be. So he took the note.
"Thank You, I shall give it some thought"
"My husband was raped." Devon said bluntly and it made him startle. "Things got messy over there, war, violence… it gets in people's heads and messes them up until they don't know what's up and what's down. And he was just an ordinary soldier, one of thousands and it changed him. What you were doing, spying, being a double agent? I can't begin to imagine how hard that must be, the toll it would take. What you did, it might have felt dirty being all messed up in there but you probably saved countless lives doing it and even if you don't feel like it you are allowed to be happy. The world owes that to you, no matter what you've done in the past…you deserve your happiness, get me?"
He'd never heard it put so bluntly, but he felt Devon's words, really felt them. And for perhaps the first time he truly believed it.
" I will reach out to her. Thank You."
"Right, now let's find you something. You don't seem like the glitter jelly and bells and whistles type, but there are some that have an extra slot for a bullet if you want to give you girl a little extra thrill"
Caught off-guard he barked out a laugh at the idea of him owning anything made out of sparkly glitter jelly, and followed Devon back into the store.
-O-
The one he'd chosen was plain black, and did indeed have a part to add a small vibrating piece to it if Hermione liked the idea.
"Devon seemed really nice, I actually started crying in his store when I went in because of my stupid hormones and he was so nice. Perhaps we should invite him and his husband out for coffee sometime, like a double date sort of thing? He'd said they only recently moved the shop into the area and they didn't know anyone local. It would be nice to have some friends on the other side of diagon alley, like a fresh start you know?"
He did, and the idea of having muggle friends who had no idea about voldemort, or their own personal history appealed. "I shall consider it" He said it in an overly bland manner which made her laugh, but the truth was he actually would give it serious consideration.
Because he was looking forward to the future, for the first time in his life.