Ch 3 - In the Middle of War

James imagined Teresa's terror when she would be awakened by someone else but him in the very yearly morning only to find out that it would not for a job, but to be loaded into the Torrez Cleaning Services white van, most likely manhandled and bound.

The brothers were one of Camila's side contacts that he hated the most. They were rude and rudimentary; neither of them could speak English well, and in even Spanish they couldn't come up with a sentence longer than a few words.

The girl would be terrified, she'd walk out of the warehouse quietly, expecting to see him for instructions, then maybe she's inquire about his whereabouts with the stone face which hid her fear and doubt, until she'd realize she was being betrayed and sacrificed by the Mother Savior, who not only had never been a real savior to anyone, but had repeatedly told Teresa that they were her new family: the family that would protect her!

The thought of Teresa's fighting and trying to kick her way out made his stomach squeeze to the point of him having to force his breathing to calm down. His mind though wouldn't listen, and he fought back the questions accosting him: Would she feel the light was out? Would she think about him? Would she curse why she was born to be betrayed again and again? Would they be on time intersecting the Torrez van before it crossed the border? Would the plan work? Would all get out unharmed?

The shot he executed hit the van's tire and made the vehicle swivel in the side ditch and come to a winding halt. His man Ronnie had driven his truck in front of the van for the last 5 minutes after cutting in front of them at the last intersection of the last small border town at a lower speed. This had made the van slow down enough to ensure the driver of the van won't lose control once his tire gave out.

What followed was quick and painless. The Torrez brothers got out from both sides of the van, cursing and fuming, which allowed James to quickly shoot each one with a dud bullet loaded with a drug that would ensure they were out for about an hour. Ronnie backed up, got out of his truck and before James had had the time to come down from his hiding place to the north side of the road, he had recovered Teresa from the back. She was gagged and her hands were tied. Ronnie was undoing both as James came down from his elevated hiding position running and peeling off the balaclava off his head. Teresa's eyes opened wide as she stared at him trying to gulp air and not choke now that the gag was out.

"I'm outta here, Sarge! Talk later!" Ronnie jogged in the direction of his truck and sped out in a cloud of smoke as they both stared after him.

"Come with me!" James said and turned to run in the direction of his car, which was hidden behind his hiding spot, Teresa following closely at his feet.

He drove for about 30 minutes taking country roads and putting as much distance as he could between the main road to Mexico and them. When they passed a few farms and finally got into a small village, he pulled over on the main square.

The bus stop was right there, one bus with people on board was idling and one was parked, as the two drivers were finishing their smokes.

James finally took a longer look at Teresa's disheveled state and scared face. She hadn't spoken at all, but her breathing had calmed down. She held onto the door handle with white fingers and stared back.

"You're free to go!', James said to Teresa and she almost jerked at the sound of his voice and the meaning of his words. He was still looking intently at her as she realized he was serious.

"It was a jail break," he said shaking his head. His eyes opened wide at her as if questioning her difficulty to comprehend what he had said.

"I have nowhere to go," she said softly and to his surprise she continued without him asking anything: "My friend Brenda and her son are…also in Dallas…and escaped after me…I can't just leave on my own…besides I have no money and will end up on a dark street...yeah, not dead, but same fate whether in Culiacan or Dallas." She looked at her feet and removed hair from her face.

James needed a second to process the fact that Teresa had shared something with him about herself, then his mind assimilated the harshness of what she had said, and it gave him an unpleasant jolt.

"I hate this life!" he grumbled. "You're right, let's get out!" and he sped down as if someone was chasing him.

It was a very decent motel, Teresa reasoned. It looked like he didn't like crappy and dingy. Still a motel, but a high end one, if such a thing existed. He had paid at the reception and gotten one room. Maybe they knew him as the man behind the counter didn't look suspiciously at the roll of cash James took out and then put back in his pocket.

When he waited for her to enter the room so that he could take a last look around before going in himself, she noticed his face was grim and he sported a deep wrinkle between his eyebrows. He wasn't even trying to conceal his facial expression unlike other times.

She sat on the chair in front of the little writing desk and asked as he walked to the bar and got himself a bottle of water: "Who was this man? He called you 'Sarge.'"

"Just someone I know and trust," he said and finished the small bottle.

"Are you army buddies?...Did you serve?" Teresa knew 'Sarge' to be an abbreviation for a military rank.

"Yes", the curt answer was accompanied by a drag of his hand over his face and Teresa knew that he was not interested in answering her questions, but she couldn't believe he had broken her out of Camila's men and had left them unconscious, but alive, on the side of the road.

"You engaged your army buddy to break me free from Camila?' she said more to herself: "What would she did to you?" Teresa wasn't sure why this came out, but she had been certain James would not go against La Jefa ever.

He started pacing around the room: "Remains to be seen...keeping in mind that I'm the usual subject of her dirty kill orders." His tone spoke volumes and so she probed further.

"You did this all for me?" It looked like there wasn't anything for her to lose by asking questions!

"And for me!" he stopped pacing and looked at her: "It wasn't right…what she was doing to you...after what you did for her business these last two weeks. Her effing problem is with her asshole of a husband…and it is her problem, not yours or mine!"

Teresa stared at him pensively and he wondered what deep thoughts were clouding her forehead. That he was different? That he was good person? Even if she really thought that she definitely would come short of telling him!

"Help me help you, Teresa!" he said eagerly gesturing at her with is hand. "Why did Camila want you so close? And now suddenly gave up on you? What have you got up your sleeve?"

Teresa looked like she knew this man was the closest to an ally she had, but she only squeezed her eyes in an effort to control her emotions.

"What's the matter?" He was still looking intently at her.

"I'm just so afraid...not to make a mistake," her voice faltered.

"What mistake?" James pushed, hand scrunching his facial hair out of nervousness.

"To tell you", she looked visibly upset at having had to say this after what he had just done for her. "I'm sorry", she went on. "You risked so much for me…I should feel okay to tell you, just that…"

"In this biz trust is tough to give", he interrupted. "I know that...but you can trust me!"

She exhaled deep: "I need to do this my way." He had heard curt ambiguous answers from her many times before and wasn't a fan of them.

"Why your way?" he said.

"It's my ticket out," another short answer, damn it!

"I see," he didn't see…not really but had no idea how to help someone who didn't want to be helped despite their whole appearance screaming they needed his help.

So, he verbalized the spiteful remark that came to his tongue: "I thought some time ago when you said you couldn't become like me…that your only option would be to run!"

She looked at him with pain in her eyes: "You would chase me...Camila would make you…she told me herself I should not think about running….She made you tell me as well…Remember?"

He remembered very well. He remembered with crystal clarity every conversation they had had and every instruction Camila had given him regarding her!

"True!" he admitted: "But even if that happens, it doesn't mean I would hurt you or drag you back by force!"

Teresa took a bottle of water herself and while opening it said: "You mean that?"

He caught his tone on time and softened it: "I'm not a monster, Teresa!

It hurt him so much that she could believe that he'd hurt her after having worked together almost daily. But it hurt him even more that he cared what she thought, which in his mind translated into weakness. And James viewed himself as anything but weak. He also viewed himself as intelligent enough to realize when a weakness was threatening him and to eliminate it; and in both these instances he had failed to do what he thought he should.

"So, are you going to tell me anything that may help me…help us get in front of this?" he repeated.

She drank again and then looked him straight in the eyes: "My boyfriend left me a notebook with details of Epifanio's operation ….for me to use as a bargaining chip…for my life… if he gets killed…he and his cousin Chino…they both were killed as they…were stealing." She was looking at her hands now, both folded guiltily in her lap.

James's forehead wrinkled: "Stealing from Epifanio Vargas?"

She nodded and avoided his eyes.

"And his plan ...didn't quite...work for you...I gather?" he surmised and sat on the bed opposite her.

"No...didn't give me the position he thought it would." She mumbled. Guero's plan had been nothing but dumb and it hurt her to think it, but she had admitted it to herself already.

"Hmm," James made a face: "Such info is leverage in the hands of someone who can defend themselves...not that you didn't survive so far," he almost smiled at her: "But the notebook puts you in more danger than you not having it…"

She only nodded.

"I'm sure he meant for the best…" he seemed to be looking for something nice to say and was finding it difficult.

"Maybe," was all she said. She looked uncertain if she believed it herself.

"I never met him...your man", James took a deep breath. What an idiot! was the actual thought crossing his mind: "I've worked for Camila only ...but truth be told...it's a very risky plan...to put your woman in the cross hairs of the cartel by giving her this info…it's like putting a target on her back!" His tone had gone up a notch and she felt he was working himself up as the thoughts were coming to his head.

"It's a dumb plan…you can say it!" Teresa said with a sigh: "You'd never...put your girlfriend in such a position?" she wasn't sure where this had come from and even seemed uncomfortable having said it.

He wrinkled his eyebrows at her: "Kim isn't responsible for any of the shit I am involved in...and I hide her pretty well...only a snitch could divulge info about my family!" he said and she noticed his choice of words. He had said 'family' without any hesitation, and she had to admit it stung a little.

His voice brought her back to the present: "But no, I won't!...Whoever wants to harm me, would have to seriously look to find her...and I would always protect her...I do have enemies but they're not the people I work for...if you know what I mean!"

"I know...you don't steal from your boss...I know...you can say it!" She seemed more relaxed saying the truths out loud, he noticed.

"I'm sorry you're put in this position…so what's in this book?" James had to get back on track. Time was ticking, he needed a plan for dealing with Epifanio who would be expecting the Torrez brothers' delivery.

"I only read parts of it…before I had to run", she started hesitantly.

"Where is it?", he asked.

"In Mexico…hidden". One more puzzle!

"Do you remember anything?' James probed.

"I do", the answer was to the point and surprised him.

"Really?" he inched forward.

"Yes…I actually am very good at math and…I remember things fast…not like a photographic memory…like you see on the movies," the last words made him smile and she smiled hesitantly back.

"So, what do you remember?" he nudged.

"Epifanio has six warehouses in Northern Mexico…I know the places…he uses two banks to launder money, I remember the account numbers, but the amounts were in the ranges of $5mln per month, which makes me think there's a lot of cash stashed somewhere else and not laundered." She finished and waited.

"And you remember the addresses and the account numbers! Wow! I'm impressed!" he was and he didn't hide it.

She shook her head: "This is not a lot…there's many more numbers and notes in this book…some of which I couldn't make any sense…I remember his lieutenants, I mean most likely that's them….they go by code names …and his unprocessed coke deliveries arrive Saturday evenings at the warehouses, they use a transportation company owned by a numbered company out of Nogales."

"That's more than enough", James said and got up. "You'll need to jot it down for me …as I'm not as good as you at remembering", he said.

She smiled and took the writing pad from the table and the pen from the drawer and started writing what she had been able to cram in her head before she had been discovered. Once finished, she looked up and asked: "What're you going to do?"

He folded the paper and put in the inner pocked of his leather jacket: "I have to think about it, but in general terms: extort Epifanio!" he said with an even tone.

"Can I come too?" she said as it was clear he would be heading to Mexico. She wasn't sure why she had said it. Maybe it had to do with her idea that he could and would protect her too!

His answer and stare came back fast: "No! Why would I undo what I did today? You got caught in the war between Epifanio and Camila, none of it is your fault, but they used you as pawn to get advantage over each other".

Teresa knew all that but somehow it felt wrong that he'd jump in the fire for her: "Listen James!' she started and he turned back to her as he had already been on his way out: "I am very grateful for what you did….but this is a dangerous thing trying to extort Epifanio…to save me…and I should be dead, by all accounts …and I'm not!", her tone sounded dead resigned and gave him goosebumps.

He needed to tell her it would be okay and that she should not feel any guilt over his choice to get into a situation: "I know it's dangerous…but I work for Camila and as much as they are 'at war', they're still a family…he won't jump to kill me without thinking twice!" James said and waited.

As she didn't say anything, he added: "See, his thing is 'control'…he wants Camila back by his side, all loving and caring…he doesn't want to further deepen the rift between them…or at least I think so!"

His mind was churning as he stepped out of the door and lit a smoke. He had just lit a second one and was deep in thoughts, when the door slightly opened and she stepped out next to him, looking scared and subdued, her loose wild hair circling her pale face.

"Can you give me one?" she said softly.

"What?" He didn't understand.

"A cigarette", she said.

"Oh…you wanna bum off a cigarette…sure", he took the pack out of his jacket and after she put the cigarette in her mouth, he lit it for her in silence.

She sensed he needed silence to think and didn't say anything while he reinforced the decision, he had made when she had told him about the book: the decision not to play her or mislead her but to let her choose. He needed to play Epifanio and Camila to save the girl and his boss's business. Anything less was too risky for his own position, especially in light of the fact that he was actually trying to save the Vargas family from mutual destruction.

He turned to Teresa and said: "Epifanio is just a typical man...vain and self-centered…typical testosterone infused brain and behavior!"

He could hear her take a sharp breath in: "Aren't all men like that?"

"Are we?" he wondered if she really believed it, so he challenged her with an expression that contained both a hue of humor and of displeasure.

"Well…in my experience, yes!…You're different?" This was a 'funny' conversation, James thought.

It took him a few seconds to figure out his answer: "I'm still a man...but…I don't necessarily need to be on top...like Epifanio...and don't take stupid risks or make dumb schemes like your boyfriend …and no such obsession ...like the one to be on top, can make me lose sight of what actually matters!"

"Which is?" She wasn't letting go!

"I can still be in the right spot and get what I want, which is to win the war, even if a lose the battle!" and after peeling off a few $100 bills from the roll that he took out and handing them to her, he turned on his heel and walked towards his parked sedan without looking back. She stared behind him catching herself think about the clear sparkle in his eyes that had made their familiar light whiskey color look black. And she couldn't help but wonder if he was talking only about business or about something else!