At the end of Transfiguration class a scant two weeks before Christmas, and only one week before the train back to Kings Cross, McGonagall finally bothered to get around to telling her students that there was going to be a Yule Ball for the TriWizard Tournament instead of the normal Christmas Feast on Christmas evening.

And as everyone headed out of the classroom when the bell rang just as she finished up explaining what the Yule Ball was, she called Fitz over to her desk before FitzSimmons could make it out of the classroom. Professor McGonagall briefly glanced at Simmons when she stuck by her husband's side as always, but apparently the deputy headmistress had finally given up on ever trying to speak to Harry Potter alone, as the older woman didn't say anything about the biochemist's presence.

But once the last of the other students had left the classroom, she did say, "Potter, the champions and their partners open the ball."

"Open…how?" Fitz replied, as nowhere in her spiel about the event had she mentioned anything about anything being opened, so he legitimately had no clue what on earth she was talking about.

But apparently expecting Harry Potter to be able to read her mind, or else already know the enigmatic inner machinations of this event's mind that he had never been told about before five minutes earlier, and therefore never heard of before five minute earlier, McGonagall answered irritably, "The dance, Potter. It is traditional. You are a Hogwarts champion, and you will do what is expected of you as a representative of the school. So make sure you get yourself a partner, Potter."

Fitz thought about just nodding his acknowledgement and walking out — obviously he already had his partner, and not just for the Yule Ball but for life itself — but then he had a better idea. So he quickly turned to his wife and grabbed her face, planting his lips down hard on hers and beginning to snog her passionately. Simmons immediately got her husband's message and began snogging him back just as hard, using lots and lots of tongue to make sure that McGonagall couldn't possibly miss that 'Harry Potter' had himself a partner already, thank you very much.

Only an awkward cough from their stern teacher finally broke them apart, both FitzSimmonses panting slightly, and Simmons giving her husband one last quick peck on the lips for good measure. Then they turned as one and walked out of the classroom without ever looking back over at Professor McGonagall, who had gone rather flushed and certainly flustered at having to watch who she thought were a fifteen and fourteen year old practically make out right in front of her, but part of her was secretly quite pleased that that was one thing that she didn't have to worry over about the upcoming ball, whether Potter would find a partner or not in the absolute minimum amount of time that she had given him to do so.

~FS~

Over the next few days a few brave girls looked in the direction of Fitz, but considering the fact that there was always a girl right beside him, and had been as long as he had been at the school, none of them tried approaching him.

FitzSimmons weren't to completely avoid anyone talking to them about the Yule Ball, however, as during the final Care of Magical Creatures class of the term, Hagrid brought it up. But not before he lamented his interview with Ms Skeeter a few days before to them first.

"She didn' seem very int'rested in magical creatures, ter tell yeh the truth," he told them quietly during class as they prepared food for the skrewts that still hadn't been shot or collected by the Ministry yet. "She jus' wanted me ter talk about you, Harry. Well, I told her we'd been friends since I went ter fetch yeh from the Dursleys. 'Never had to tell him off in four years?' she asked. 'Never played you up in lessons, has he?' I told her no, an she didn' seem happy at all. Yeh'd think she wanted me to say yeh were horrible, Harry."

"Makes sense," Simmons answered with a thoughtful nod. "Her first article right after Harry's name came out was all about how great of a hero Harry Potter is, so now that she's set him up on a pedestal, it's time to bring him crashing to the ground in a scathing review about how terrible he really is. That's what sells newspapers, which is how she makes a living. Well, she sells articles to the newspaper, but she can only sell if they see that her articles are making people buy the newspaper. She needs strong emotional response from the newspaper-buying sheeple, and no better way to do that than to swing their emotions from one extreme to the other. And if she successfully figures out how to do that, at the end of the year right before the final task she'll probably try to portray him as the broken hero who has had to struggle through lots of heartbreak just to get where he is. Back, and forth, and back, and forth — it's all about emotional manipulation, facts are irrelevant."

Hagrid just kind of stared at her and Fitz in shock for several seconds, both at her for her scathing opinion of Ms Skeeter and the newspaper industrial complex (and media, period) at large, and at Fitz for acting like he didn't care two knuts what the woman wrote about him in the Daily Prophet, before finally changing the subject entirely and saying, "Excited fer the Yule Ball, Harry? Though' I might look in on it, too. Should be a good do, I reckon. You'll be openin the dancin', won yeh, Harry? Who're you takin'?"

Once again Fitz decided to take the visual response as opposed to a verbal one, and leaned over to his wife and kissed her. As there was the entire rest of the class around this time, even if they weren't all directly paying attention to what Harry Potter was doing at the moment, he didn't start snogging Jemma as passionately as they had in Professor McGonagall's classroom the week before when first told about the existence of the ball, but he did kiss her strongly enough to leave Hagrid with no doubt as to whom he was taking to the Yule Ball the following week.

After staring at a fourteen year old Harry Potter in shock for several seconds, by the time FitzSimmons broke apart Hagrid had collected himself, and smiled at them saying, "Well, good fer yeh, Harry. You two'll be th' bes' couple there."

~FS~

Christmas morning FitzSimmons found three presents sitting at the foot of their bed.

They quickly shuffled down the bed and began opening them, wondering who had sent them presents this year. Straight away they noticed that Hagrid was back after a one year hiatus, probably because Harry Potter's name had come out of the goblet and as the youngest contestant Hagrid felt bad for him, or possibly because they had talked with him off and on during class about the tournament and the Yule Ball coming up that night enough that he thought that they were friends with him and sent Harry a Christmas present for that reason. Though if that were true, why he hadn't sent Hermione a present as well was beyond FitzSimmons' heads. But either way, or for some third reason that they didn't guess off the tops of their heads, he had sent Harry a large box full of wizarding sweets from Honeydukes.

The next present they opened reminded them of their Firebolt broomstick from the year before, as this one also had no label saying who had sent it to Harry. It appeared to be a penknife that was supposed to be able to open any lock and undo any knot, so they set it to the side to give to the professors to check over for curses once again, as there was no way in hell that they were about to accept an anonymous gift without taking any safety precautions at all. But if it did check out, it seemed like something useful to keep in their every day carry collection along with their wands and when possible Harry Potter's invisibility cloak, in case they ever ran across a situation where they needed it.

And finally, there was yet again a package from the redheads' mother, which as soon as they realized was in fact from her yet again, before they even saw what was in it, they immediately tossed to the side to throw in some fire in some little used section of the castle, seriously troubled by the fact that she kept sending Harry a present every year despite not knowing him, especially now that Ronald wasn't even talking to them anymore, like he had been the three previous years when his mum had sent them, and only them — her own family not included, they assumed and sure as hell hoped that she sent her own kids presents as well — a present.

But speaking of Ronald Weasley, for the first time ever he hadn't sent them a present. Not that they were particularly surprised, assuming that it was because he was still busy hating them, first for Harry's name having come out of the Goblet and believing Fitz to be a liar when Fitz said that he hadn't entered himself, and more recently for not trying in the first task since his name had come out of the goblet and he had the opportunity to compete. Nor did they care, in fact the were rather more relieved than otherwise, as it was always weird receiving a gift from him since they never got him anything, never having been friends with him, mere acquaintances at their absolute best points.

Finished with their yearly presents opening (or tossing to the side to incinerate later), FitzSimmons directed their attentions to each other, 'opening' their gifts from one another, ie their bodies in unrestrained passion. And once they were finally all orgasmed out for the time being they headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast to refuel, so that they could then get out to play in the freshly fallen snow as soon as possible. After that they spent the entire day alternating between playing outside in the snow and playing inside in their bed, finding time once in the middle to insert lunch into their very busy schedule, so that they would continue to have the energy necessary for the other two strenuous physical activities that they were filling their Christmas day with.

A little while before the Yule Ball was set to start that evening, long after the sun had set and their activities had been restricted to strictly indoors, FitzSimmons donned their formal clothes that they had got over the summer. For upon reading on their booklists that they needed 'dress robes', they had gone to the clothes store in the Montana magical town on the day that they went to pick up their new books, wondering if the wizarding world actually had a fashion sense after all that they kept very well hidden on a day-to-day basis, just to discover that 'dress robes' were nothing more than slightly fancier, colored robes. So rather than buy robes when they never wore any in the castle to start with, and wanting something actually fancy if there was going to be a fancy get-together (as dress robes certainly seemed to be wizarding world's grievously failed attempt at fancy clothes), after they had finished up getting everything magical that they needed, they'd had the Knight Bus drop them off at a normal clothes store within walking distance of their safehouse so that they could buy real nice clothes.

And so now on Christmas evening as Fitz put on his formal bounty-hunter ensemble since there was no way that either of them were having him dress up in a suit and look like Leopold if they could at all help it, Simmons slipped into her emerald-green strapless black-tie gala dress that was guaranteed to make jaws drop, especially as they weren't completely sure that half of the castle had never even seen a hint of cleavage before, let alone what Jemma was currently showing.

Walking up to the common room twenty minutes before the Yule Ball was supposed to open in the Great Hall, FitzSimmons immediately saw jaws start dropping to the floor as they walked through on their way to the portrait hole. But they ignored everyone's gawking looks and headed downstairs, where they could make even more people stare at them as they waited for this thing to get started. And make people stare they did, turning every head already in the entrance hall when they arrived, and drawing every new head that arrived towards them as they hung out in the corner since the doors to the Great Hall weren't open yet, standing together with their arms loosely wrapped around each other's waists talking quietly.

Five minutes before time they saw Ron walk down the grand staircase alone, having either opted to come alone, or else unable to fine anyone who would come with him — which was actually the case, as the only person whom he had asked, the only person good enough looking and with a centered enough nose for him, was Fleur Delacour, and she had just stared at him until he had run away. But FitzSimmons didn't know this, nor did they care whether he had chosen to come alone or if it had been chosen for him by his attitude and reputation, and were instead distracted by his dress robes. They looked like something from the end of the nineteenth century, though which end was still up for debate. And unlike most of the dress robes that everyone else was wearing, they looked more like a dress than slightly fancier robes, and the edges were all frayed like he had taken the Severing Charm to them for some reason that was now severed off, but had done a very bad job of it.

But FitzSimmons hadn't just spotted Ron, he had also spotted them, and especially Simmons' strapless, low-cut, (rather Slytherin) green dress, and immediately strode over to them.

"What the hell is that?!" he shouted as soon as he was close enough, pointing at Simmons' dress.

"It's common for Balls in the normal world," Fitz answered. "And to be quite honest, dress robes seemed extremely boring for something that's supposed to be nice, so we went with something nice instead of them. And boy, was that a smart decision — is everyone here going to a Christmas party, or class?"

Fortunately anything that Ron might have been about to retort was prevented by Professor McGonagall calling out at that moment from near the doors, "Champions over here, please!"

"Well, that's us," Fitz said, before removing his arm from around his wife's waist to hold it out by his side for her to loop her arm through, and together they set off across the entrance hall to join the three champions and their own dates.

Less fortunately, however, Ron wasn't the only person there who didn't seem to appreciate FitzSimmons' choice of formal wear, for as soon as they arrived at the doors into the Great Hall, McGonagall took one gaping look at both of them (though a split second longer at Simmons and her plunging décolletage), and angrily shouted, "What are you two wearing?!"

"Remember that whole debacle first year where we refused to wear robes and you took somewhere around a hundred completely meaningless points away from us?" Simmons answered coolly. "Yeah, well, we're not about to change that and start wearing robes now. Especially at something that is supposed to be fancy and formal, not drab, boring, and look like everyone is just going to class on a mundane Monday morning. So we chose something appropriately fancy for a ball, which is this — anyone from the real world would recognize it immediately, and be envious, not angry. So unless you want to be late starting this ball, I suggest you move right along with whatever you're supposed to be doing instead of picking a fight you can't win — and that includes literal fights, as I can still whip your arse while dressed like this, and yes, I do have my wand with me like every moment of every day since I'm not stupid, so I'll happily take you on physically or magically even in this dress."

Apparently deciding that starting the Yule Ball was more important than trying to make two students who had never followed her clothing rules and had complete immunity change out of the non-approved clothes that they were wearing (if whatever that was that Granger was flaunting her body in could even be called 'clothes', it looked more like an undergarment or sleep clothes of some strange muggle kind), into approved robes that she had a strong suspicion they didn't even own any of, Professor McGonagall relented and told FitzSimmons and three champions and their dates to stand off to the side while she opened the doors and everyone else walked past them into the Great Hall and took their seats.

Once everyone was inside and seated she finally had the champions enter one after the other with their partner, and walk straight up the middle of the hall between all of the medium-sized round tables that everyone was seated at, up to a slightly larger round table at the very head of the Great Hall where the three headmasters and other appropriate adults were already seated. At a distance FitzSimmons assumed that it was the five judges who were seated at the table that they were heading for, but as they got up close both of them realized that Mr Crouch wasn't there, and instead Percy Weasley was taking up the fifth spot for some reason. And as the eight champions and partners made it right up to the table Weasley pulled out the chair next to him with a very pointed look at Fitz, so FitzSimmons quickly slipped into two seats on the completely opposite side of the table, having no interest in being around any Weasleys, especially one who so clearly wanted Harry Potter to sit next to him. Weasley scowled very reminiscent of his younger brother Ron, but as Krum and his date sat down next to Weasley a moment later, the redhead had to school his features again and pretend that he was interested in the Bulgarian quidditch star who had been chosen as the most worthy to represent Durmstrang in the TriWizard Tournament.

Meanwhile on the opposite side of the table, FitzSimmons were whispering to each other wondering where the fifth judge, Mr Crouch was, or if he had simply not been interested in coming to a Yule Ball that had nothing to actually do with the tournament and so had sent an underling in his place so that he could do something more enjoyable with his Christmas evening. They hoped that the older man wasn't injured or sick as they wished that upon no one, and that he simply had better things to do with his time and the authority to do them, but it didn't really matter either way, it was what it was, and they didn't care about the tournament anyway, not that this was actually a part of the tournament and needed any of the judges to begin with.

During supper FitzSimmons contentedly talked amongst themselves for the most part, but spent a while talking with Fleur as well who had sat down next to them since they were the only two people in the castle who weren't affected by her allure. Then an hour later when supper was all finished Dumbledore stood up and waved all of the tables to the side, and the band came out to start the opening song. FitzSimmons and the other three pairs took to the dance floor as the Weird Sisters began playing, waltzing to the slow, mournful tune that was being played.

It had been a long time since FitzSimmons had been to any kind of formal dance, and it felt nice to be able to show off with everyone staring at them, Simmons' dress twirling around her calves as Fitz spun her around with a precision that could only come from twenty years by each others' sides. But the opening song had to end sooner or later, and as the band struck up a merrier, faster beat other couples began joining the champions on the floor, and soon FitzSimmons were just one of a hundred pairs swaying in time with the rhythm.

The science duo danced for over an hour before finally drifting off to the side to catch their breaths and grab a couple of Butterbeers. Seeing people drifting out of the Great Hall into the entrance hall, they remembered the garden outside that they had seen through the doors whenever the Beauxbatons and Durmstrang students had come inside before the Yule Ball had started, and went to explore. Stepping out through the great oak doors they discovered that the courtyard had been transformed into a beautiful rose garden, complete with hundreds of living fairies lighting it up with their twinkling lights. FitzSimmons set off through the winding paths, wandering their way towards a fountain that they could hear hidden somewhere in the midst of the conjured garden, enjoying the magical warmth that kept the cold and snow that they had played in all day at bay. After about ten minutes of meandering they found the fountain glistening in the moonlight, the water cascading down from the statue of Father Christmas in middle, catching the light and sparkling like diamonds in the still night air.

Fitz spun Simmons around to face him and kissed her lovingly, Jemma's arms quickly wrapping around his neck to pull herself flush against him as she kissed back. They leisurely snogged for a long while, losing track of time under the stars, until a couple of playful cat-calls made them break apart. They looked over to find a small group of their fellow fourth year Gryffindors gathered watching them, Lavender and Parvati of whom looked the most likely culprits for interrupting their 'moment'.

"Don't you guys have dates of your own to bother?" Fitz called out without any bite. "Hermione and I were having a moment."

"About a ten minute moment, and who knows how long you were kissing before we even saw you," Sally-Anne smirked back. "But we saw Snape wandering through the garden cursing kissing couples apart as we came out, so when we saw you we figured we should give you a heads up."

"After watching us for ten minutes?" Simmons questioned teasingly.

"Yeah, well, we were still running interference for you two had he swept through during that time," Lavender defended.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Simmons laughed as she removed her hands from around her husband's neck and grabbed his hand and pulled him over to where the others were standing ten yards away where the rose bushes ended and the open area for the fountain began. "Like we need interference for Snape. I would say thanks for the thought, but I know you were watching just to watch. And yes, sorry ladies, Harry Potter is already taken."

"Also, sorry ladies, but Hermione Granger is taken as well," Fitz smirked as soon as she was finished, earning him a slap to the chest by the back of his wife's hand.

"Seriously, though, we'll go snog somewhere else for a while so that the next couple can have the romantic fountain, but good evening to you all," Simmons said.

But it turned out that they wouldn't be finding a nice shrubbery to snog behind or patch of grass to watch the stars from quite yet, as Sally-Anne said, "I really love your dress, Hermione," and they spent the next fifteen minutes talking dresses and Fitz's outfit.

But eventually FitzSimmons did get on their way again, where they found some grass up against the castle wall to sit on and watch the stars and talk, until the bell high above them rang out that it was one hour until midnight, and therefore one hour until the end of the ball and everyone turned back into pumpkins. At which point they headed back inside to get in a few more dances before they left the party a bit early so that they could avoid all of the crowds heading back to their respective common rooms, especially the Gryffindors to Gryffindor Tower, and slip down to their dorm room before anyone else made it back up there.

However, no sooner had they entered the Great Hall than Mr Bagman bounced over to them and cheerfully said to Fitz, "Harry! Wonder if I could have a quick, private word with you? You couldn't give us a moment, could you?" he finished to Simmons.

"No, but we'll go talk with you," Simmons answered.

Apparently agreeable enough with this, Mr Bagman led them away from the door towards one of the corners of the Great Hall, near where Dumbledore had moved some of the tables to earlier in the evening right before the dancing began.

Once they were away from the crowds, Mr Bagman turned to Fitz and asked in a lowered voice, "I wanted to ask you, how are you getting on with your golden egg?"

"Haven't made any progress whatsoever," Fitz answered honestly, neglecting to mention that it might have had something to do with the fact that they hadn't laid eyes on their egg since the night of the first task when he had given them said egg.

But Mr Bagman had wanted to help Harry Potter before the first task the same as Hagrid and Professor Moody had, so if he wanted to help Harry Potter again for the second task, Fitz, and he knew Simmons as well, were happy to find out just how much Mr Bagman was willing to tell them in hopes of figuring out why exactly everyone was trying to help Harry Potter win — because it certainly wasn't trying to help the contestant who had been enslaved in the tournament survive, as if that had been the case, either one of the judges would have told Fitz exactly what every task was and what he needed to know to survive each task (after all, only teachers weren't allowed to give help, there was nothing stated about judges not being able to help), or the judges would have immediately called the first task for FitzSimmons as soon as they started dancing instead of actually trying to get the egg. But the adults hadn't done either of those things, instead Hagrid, Professor Moody, and Judge Bagman had all tried giving Harry Potter hints on how to do well in the task, which meant that they clearly wanted him to win, not simply survive. That or they were all complete morons, but FitzSimmons were trying to give them the benefit of the doubt.

"Oh — well, if you want any help at all, a prod in the right direction...I've taken a liking to you...well, just say the word, Harry," Mr Bagman replied.

"Sure," Fitz answered. "I don't think we'll ever solve it before the second task on our own."

The evening after the second task was over, sure, but definitely not before.

Mr Bagman had a practically gleeful look on his boyish face as he leaned in and said in a hushed voice, "You have to listen to it underwater, Harry. Find somewhere that you can open it underwater, and it'll all become clear."

"Thank you, Mr Bagman, kind sir," Simmons replied. "We will definitely do that." Just as soon as the second task is over and it doesn't matter anymore.

Mr Bagman nodded with a bright smile before bouncing off towards the crowds again, FitzSimmons following along at a slower pace, headed towards the dance floor to get in a few more dances before they needed to head back up to their dorm before the crowds.

All the while, unseen by any of them — not that FitzSimmons would have cared, or even thought twice about it if they had noticed him — Professor Moody sat lurking at one of the tables near where Mr Bagman had led FitzSimmons to talk to Fitz, eavesdropping on their conversation. And as they all headed back towards the festivities, he smiled to himself — Harry Potter would be properly prepared for this next task, and be able to make up a lot of the ground that he had lost not trying in the first task.

On the first day of the new term FitzSimmons trudged with the rest of the Gryffindors through waist-deep-to-a-first-year snow from Herbology class in the greenhouses down to Hagrid's hut for Care of Magical Creatures class.

But instead of Hagrid standing outside of his hut eagerly awaiting them to try something new with the blast-ended skrewts, they found an old witch standing in front of his door.

Who as the Gryffindors were still struggling through the snow to get to her, barked at them, "Hurry up, now, the bell rang five minutes ago."

Not about to put up with attitude from a substitute in the kind of weather that they were having to trudge through to manage to get to class at all, Simmons raised an eyebrow at this unpleasant sounding woman, before deliberately looking around them. Once she had made a complete three-sixty, taking in all of the half of the class that wasn't even there at all yet and nowhere in sight, she said pointedly to no one in particular, but definitely to the woman, "Huh — I don't see a single Slytherin here yet, only Gryffindors."

And then she turned right back around towards the castle and walked away, Fitz following in her literal footsteps that she made through the thick snow.

It was several seconds, but only maybe twenty feet later when they heard the woman bark, "Ten points for talking back to a professor, and get back here this moment, or it will be detention or both of you!"

"Maybe we'll make it in five minutes!" Fitz shouted back over his shoulder, hoping that she would get the reference to her own accusation that they had all intentionally been five minutes late from their previous class, rather than getting there as fast as humanly possible through the crystalized water vapor lying stacked high on the frozen ground.

As they continued trudging back up to the castle the woman shouted after them, "Get back here this instant! I'm not joking about giving you both detention, even if you are a champion in the tournament, Potter!", but FitzSimmons ignored her and continued slowly trudging their way back up to the castle.

A minute later they met Malfoy and the rest of the Slytherins finally coming down through the snow towards them, headed for Hagrid's hut far more than just five minutes late.

Seeing them walking in the wrong direction, Malfoy looked at them in confusion and asked with significantly less than his normal amount of derisive sneering, "Where are you going?"

"Professor Hagrid's not here today, and the substitute is a complete arsehole, so we're leaving," Fitz answered bluntly. "We'll try again next Creatures class and see if either Hagrid is back, or this woman has whipped her arse into shape and lost her attitude problem."

"Oh, I don't think he'll be back," Malfoy sneered, back to his normal self now that they were back in territory where he had the upper hand. "No, he's just too ashamed to show his big, ugly face."

"Is this going to be like with Mr Black last year where you act like you know something that we don't but refuse to ever tell us, or do you actually have something to say this time?" Simmons asked boredly, rolling her eyes at him.

Malfoy reached into his robes with a smirk and pulled out a clipping from the morning's Daily Prophet. "There you go — hate to break it to you, Potter, Granger…."

"Now why don't I believe that?" Simmons rolled her eyes yet again as she took the article from him and opened it up so that she and her husband could read it together.

The picture at the top of the article had been shot in such a way to intentionally make Hagrid look extremely shifty, like a tabloid instead of a reputable news source, but that was nothing compared to the actual article itself. According to it, Hagrid had mysterious powers over Dumbledore that had not only led to him getting the gamekeeper position after he had been expelled for unspecified crimes in his third year, but also getting his position as teacher of the Care of Magical Creatures class the year before; he was alarmingly large and ferocious-looking, was using his position as professor to terrorize students, and had allowed multiple students to be attacked by magical creatures in his class (disappointingly, though, despite starting out the first paragraph of the article by making Professor Moody sound dangerous, it didn't mention a single thing about Snape actually abusing students and poisoning them in his classes); the skrewts were in fact illegal crossbreeds, though nothing was mentioned about the appropriate department sweeping in past or future and removing them from the school; Hagrid was half-giant and half-human, and the insanely dangerous and blood-thirsty giant half was for all intents and purposes all that he had inherited, not any of the caring, reasoning, loving human half; his giant mother worked for Voldemort; and Dumbledore needed to terrorize all of the students in the castle just like this article would do, by telling them that Hagrid was going murder all of them and eat them in their sleep, or something like that — 'Dumbledore surely has a duty to ensure that the students are warned about the dangers of associating with part-giants'.

"I didn't know Hagrid had been expelled," Fitz commented conversationally as he read through the article. "But how did he become a professor then if he never even graduated school himself?"

"Maybe there's a test you can take in the wizarding world like there is in most countries to give you an equivalency of graduating secondary school or high school or whatever the country calls it, and he did that, and then Dumbledore counted his years as gamekeeper as practical experience or something," Simmons answered. "I don't know, it never made sense last year that he was made a teacher, and a year and a half of his classes have only made it seem more like he shouldn't have been appointed. Now, there are of course geniuses who have dropped out of school to do incredible things, but Bill Gates quitting Harvard, Hagrid is not."

When they made it a few lines further on to the part where Malfoy had told Ms Skeeter that he had been attacked by a hippogriff (true, but he had been saved from any injury at all by Fitz, who wasn't mentioned as having been actually scratched), that Crabbe had been bitten by a flobberworm (lie — they had no teeth), and that everyone hated Hagrid (another blatant lie), Fitz looked over at Malfoy and asked rhetorically, "Do you get off on lying?", earning him a slap from his wife.

But then she almost immediately after that hummed thoughtfully, "So they are illegal — we had our strong suspicions that they must be, and reported them to Dumbledore and McGonagall as likely being so, but there was still always the slim chance that he had permission, and for some reason just didn't want to tell anyone that. And manticores are highly dangerous and firecrabs can take care of themselves, so it's little surprise that their ungodly offspring would be those things Hagrid has us raising. But that raises the very interesting questions of how he managed to actually pull it off — like where did he get an illegal manticore, and where did he keep it long enough to breed that no one knew? And why did they look more like shell-less lobsters when they were young than either cubs or baby crabs. Now, it'd obviously have to be a male manticore and female firecrab, unless he artificially inseminated a female manticore, though —"

"Hermione!" Fitz cut in sharply before his wife could get too technical and detailed about husbandry in front of fourteen year olds. "I'm sure Malfoy has no interest in how they were created — or anyone besides yourself, for that matter."

"Right — of course," Simmons muttered apologetically, before looking back down at the article that she was holding. "So what's next in this steaming pile of garbage?"

"Well, this definitely isn't a mix between out of context information and straight up slander, but it turns out that Hagrid's only half-giant — you thought that he was simply a small giant," Fitz said.

"I said that he could be a small giant," Simmons huffed in reply. "I didn't know for sure what he was, and it was our first ever day in the magical world. He could have just been a really, really, really big man, for all I knew — descended from Goliath's much stronger, more muscular, taller, older brother or something, I don't know! You can't expect me to instantly have all of the answers without all the facts!"

"Coulson does, on a daily basis," Fitz replied, before saying, "I wonder if Hagrid's mum really did serve Voldemort back in the day, or if Skeeter's just talking out her arse?"

"Oh, I'd automatically assume she's talking out of her arse based on the three times she's tried to talk to you, and her entire article about you despite not being able to talk to you a single time," Simmons answered. "But that doesn't mean it couldn't still be true — even a broken analog clock is right once or twice a day. But even if it is true, you're not your father, and Daisy is neither of her parents, so it's no grounds to claim that Hagrid is the same as his mum, especially based on the non-existent, and greatly exaggerated for what even does exist, evidence about Hagrid's supposed 'inheritance of her brutal nature,' as I believe the article says."

"And speaking of inheritance of character, are there any other half-giants in this world to have established the precedent that half-giants are normally dangerous to associate with, or is she establishing that precedent out of her arse here in this article? Because I can't recall having ever read about any other half-giants, though based on this article they may just all be keeping it secret from people like Skeeter and everyone who blindly believes her. Also, if Hagrid came to school here for over two years, and immediately became the gamekeeper after he was expelled, and has presumably never once in all of that time harmed a single student, what exactly is Dumbledore supposed to be warning us about?"

"Oh, Harry, you can't think of it logically like that — you have to think of it purely emotionally!" Simmons replied with mock passion, gripping her chest as she spoke. "Ms Skeeter just told us that his mother was a blood-thirsty, Voldemort-serving, terrorist of a giant, and that he inherited all of that from her! He's a menace, one lab experiment away from ravaging the castle and killing half of the population!" Then she dropped back to a completely unamused, dry voice and finished, "You know, like that."

"Oh, right…" Fitz nodded. "The brainless sheeple method of reading and watching the news. Of course, how could I possibly forget? Yeah, sorry, I don't know how to turn my brain off enough to believe this article."

"Yes, well, unfortunately most people are, however high their IQs may be — thinking is a lost art in the normal world, and based on this article I seriously doubt that it's any different in the wizarding world," Simmons replied sadly. Handing the article back to Malfoy, she said, "You might be right about Hagrid not returning, if this heap of steaming slander ran him away. And who knows, that witch down there might actually be a good professor for the subject, we have no clue. But you'll have to tell us at supper tonight as we won't have any chance of finding out ourselves until next class, and even that depends on whether she's had an attitude adjustment between now and then. But in the meantime, Harry and I need to get up to the library so that we can study magical creatures that aren't illegal crossbreeds, since we still have to pass our final exams at the end of the year regardless of who is and isn't teaching the class and what they're teaching. So goodbye."

And with that she pushed on past where Malfoy and the rest of the fourth year Slytherins were staring at the Shield scientists in shock for everything that had just occurred, and especially at Harry Potter not angrily defending the half-giant or raging at Malfoy for lying about injuries sustained in the class, Fitz instead following right behind his wife in the trough that she was making through the thick snow.

~FS~

By the time the next Care of Magical Creatures class came around the snow had melted into a walkable slush, and FitzSimmons and the rest of the Gryffindors were physically able to make it down to Hagrid's hut from their previous class before the bell rang.

And as the witch (who was still substituting for Hagrid, just as Malfoy had predicted) found nothing new to berate Gryffindor for, FitzSimmons stayed to find out what kind of teacher she was now that she seemed to have her attitude problem sorted out. As it turned out she was actually quite capable, and had found a unicorn for them to study instead of the quite dangerous illegal crossbreeds. There was nearly an incident when she tried to clothesline Fitz as he went to approach the unicorn, claiming that unicorns were sexist (or else she was) and only liked women, but Fitz had been trained by Daisy for far too long to actually get hit, and easily blocked her assault and pushed on past her to approach the unicorn, who showed absolutely no problem with the engineer, which was of little surprise to FitzSimmons as never once in their extensive readings had they ever come across anything saying that unicorns only accepted a woman's touch, or would attack men (enemy soldiers in battle obviously being a completely different situation).

Other than that, however, the witch — whom they eventually discovered's name was Grubbly-Plank, because apparently the two worst ever surnamed people decided to get married and hyphenate their names into the even worse 'Grubbly-Plank' and then have a kid they had passed it on to — taught a good lesson, quite educated about at least unicorns, and seeming like she had teaching experience before. Making FitzSimmons wonder if she was one of those 'many better-qualified candidates' that Hagrid had been hired 'over the heads of' as Ms Skeeter had written in her article that Malfoy had shown them the previous Care class period. And so, over the next couple of weeks they continued attending class, wondering if she had permanently replaced Hagrid or if he would eventually stop putting all of his self-worth into a stupid newspaper article and get back to doing his job.

Both of his jobs, as they didn't even see him wandering about the grounds doing his job of gamekeeper during all of that time, either. In fact, they didn't even see him in the Great Hall eating up at the staff table at any point, nor did they see him anywhere in Hogsmeade halfway through January when they joined the rest of the castle third year and aboves heading to Hogsmeade to spend a day outside of the castle grounds.

It was a cold and slushy day, but FitzSimmons bundled up sufficiently enough that it wasn't really too bad, and at least they weren't looking for a secret base that only Coulson believed was there because of coordinates on his badge from Fury. They did however look through all of the shops in Hogsmeade, losing track of time and not making it to the Three Broomsticks for 'lunch' until after 1500, by which point there were only a few people still milling about, nursing their butterbeers as they avoided the weather outside.

At one point during their wanderings before going to eat themselves they had seen Mr Bagman exit the Three Broomsticks with a bevy of unpleasant-looking dwarves following close behind him, but as they were across the street and several buildings down, he had simply waved enthusiastically at Fitz and given him a questioning thumbs-up sign, which Fitz had immediately returned, assuming that he was asking if his clue about the egg had been helpful, and FitzSimmons didn't want to have to actually talk to him and come up with some excuse for why they hadn't tried it yet. But upon Fitz's returned thumbs-up Mr Bagman had smiled even more brightly, before hurrying off to wherever he had been heading, seeming quite pleased with his helping of Harry Potter. And FitzSimmons ducked into the owl post office, pleased themselves with avoiding an actual conversation with the judge.

When they stepped back out five minutes later, as there really wasn't much to look at in the post office, they saw Ms Skeeter heading into the Three Broomsticks with her photographer, whispering something urgently to him, though with as far away as they were FitzSimmons had no clue what it was about. Nor did they really care, as she wasn't trying to talk to Harry Potter, which was mostly all they cared about. And by the time they did make it to the Three Broomsticks to eat a few hours later, she had already left and they hadn't run across her anywhere else in town either, much to their relief.

After eating they headed straight back to the castle, as sunset in January that far north in Scotland was just after 1600, and they didn't want to have to be walking back in the dark any more than they could help.

~FS~

The following morning FitzSimmons saw Hagrid at the staff table again for the first time since Skeeter's article in the Daily Prophet had come out two weeks before.

And the morning after that he was back to teaching his class as well as fulfilling his gamekeeper duties around the grounds. He did continue Professor Grubby-Plank's lessons on unicorns, however, instead of bringing the two remaining blast-ended skrewts back out to terrorize, and on the Monday two days before the second task he had found two foals in all of their pure gold young unicorn glory to bring to class for them.

But as everyone moved in to pet the babies, Hagrid pulled Fitz and by extension Simmons off to the side a little, where he muttered quietly, "You okay, Harry?"

"Uh, yeah — why wouldn't I be?" Fitz asked in confusion. "I like unicorns — beautiful, majestic, powerful, deadly creatures. I'd love to own one, or two, one for each of us."

"No, no, about th' second task in a couple days," Hagrid said.

"Why would I be nervous about that?" Fitz asked in even greater confusion.

"Tha's the spirit, Harry," Hagrid said cheerfully. "Yeh're goin' ter be fine. In fact, yeh're goin' ter win this one, I know it. I can feel it. Yeh're goin' ter win, Harry. I assume yeh got yer clue all worked out, after all, haven' yeh?"

"Oh, yeah, all worked out, of course," Fitz answered enthusiastically. "We know exactly what we're going to do for the second task on Wednesday."

The first half was a complete lie, of course, but despite their interest in how much help the adults would give Harry Potter to win this tournament, he didn't feel it in his and Simmons' best interest in this particular case to let Hagrid know that they didn't know a single thing about the second task. Hagrid would blab about it to one of the professors, who then might call Fitz into their office to yell at him for completely wasting three months not solving the clue, and he didn't want to have to deal with that, just for the teacher to completely ignore him and Simmons telling said professor that they weren't trying to win the tournament to begin with. It might not happen, maybe even probably wouldn't happen, but he didn't want to deal with it if it did happen, which it definitely could. The second half of what Fitz told Hagrid was of course entirely true, though — they knew exactly what they were going to be doing, and that was absolutely nothing.

"See there? What'd I tell yeh — yeh're goin' ter win," Hagrid smiled cheerfully.

~FS~

As it turned out, though FitzSimmons obviously never knew it, Fitz's concern that Hagrid would go talk to the other professors was entirely founded.

For that very evening at supper he excitedly bragged to Professor McGonagall sitting beside him about how Harry Potter had his clue all figured out this time and was so ready for the second task after a less than ideal performance in the first task. Which Professor McGonagall was extremely pleased to hear, even if she didn't outwardly show it with any more than a tight smile. But she was nowhere near as pleased to hear the joyful news as the professor sitting on the other side of her, Professor Moody.

He had been happy to overhear Mr Bagman tell Harry how to figure out the clue at the Yule Ball, but since then he hadn't seen or heard anything about Harry doing any research into surviving in the Black Lake for an hour, and so had started becoming nervous again — he absolutely could not have a repeat of the disastrous first task. But apparently Harry and Granger had been researching when he wasn't watching, or else already knew a spell to enable Harry to breathe underwater — something that he wouldn't doubt in the least with how insanely smart the two of them were — and were completely prepared for conquering the second task like nobody's business and gaining back as many points as possible on the competition.