Curative
By Kaimaler
So yeah, this is a lotta fun to come back and write!
WHOA GUYS I'M ALIVE
Due to the sheer amount of reviews since the last update, I attempted to answer them all; however, they are all down below the chapter, so it's easier to just go ahead and read the chapter.
Also, because it's been so long since the last update, I have to try and reply to all reviews I've received since the last update, but I may have missed some people...
If I have, I apologize. If you have any questions, you can write a review about it or send me a PM with whatever you want to ask/say to me, I will do my best to respond quickly. :3
Days began to slow down, the quiet life suiting her group. They were content on the farm, happy to cook, clean, and help out any way they could; knowing that this was Hershel's land and he was quite keen on kicking them off of it. Lately, after all the fuss with the barn, with Beth's collapse, and Sophia's recovery going by, it seemed that clearing them off his land was no longer on his priority list.
In fact, it appeared to have changed his mind. At least to some degree. She hadn't spoken to him as of late, mainly because she kept with Daryl, rarely ever going far enough outside his range, unless she was checking on Sophia or some other small tasks set out for her in the day. Hershel was a kind man, he was simply very innocent of his surroundings.
It felt strange to think a man of that age and wisdom could be so easily fooled by what was happening around him. He'd lived through many a disease striking the country, none of them were of this magnitude and all wearing off shortly after they begun. So he was obviously believing that the same would happen again, that a cure for it was simple and would be carried out to the survivors of this illness sooner or later... He knew nothing of the outside world, nothing about survival or the walkers and what they truly were.
Laura knew about what happened in the bar that night Shane opened the barn, she knew in more detail as Glenn had told her event by event what really went on. She still fully believed that Rick did right, she would've done the same if she had the nerves; she knew she wouldn't be fast enough, not with any weapon to beat two armed people in a quick draw scenario. They were lucky that Rick had such familiarity with a gun and bad situations like that.
The prisoner they brought back with them was another story, Glenn said he was scared enough by the tenseness with the two men in the bar, knowing that others were coming for them and opened fire on them. When the walkers were gathering around as they heard the gunshots, one of the people firing at them had tried to jump back into their car and escape, fell on a spiked fence in between two nearby buildings.
Rick felt powerfully compelled to save the boy, he felt that leaving him was something quite cruel and inhumane. Which is probably right, Laura thought so at least, but risking so many lives for someone who wanted to kill you... She wasn't so sure about that.
Regardless, Rick did what he thought he could do to help. So he forced the boy's leg off the fence and carried him back to their car, which they escaped in with him blindfolded.
Not that he needed it, he was in so much pain he had passed out most of the ride. Glenn was tasked with holding the gun on him while Rick raced back to the farm.
Laura hadn't seen the boy or heard much about him. Daryl was suspicious in this way, he was extremely adamant about keeping her away from the shed he was locked in. From what she'd gathered around from Glenn and Andrea, Daryl took the job to get information out of the boy, Randall and ever since he, as they put it, found out enough about Randall and his group, Daryl made sure that she was no one near Randall.
Anyone she asked avoids speaking about it, like it was some big secret and she wasn't to know about it. Glenn didn't want to say anything, he just glanced towards Daryl, who was near at the time, and told her he didn't know much other than Randall's going to be released, according to Rick's plans.
Laura gave up asking about it for a while, trying was just proving useless anyways. So instead she filled her time with hunting lessons, tracking, and generally helping around the farm. Lori and her had gotten a little closer, enough to where Lori was comfortable around her without even considering her appearance and history. Laura was happy about that, about being able to befriend Rick's wife to such a degree that they could interact with no concerns or fears.
This eventually built up to Laura being around Carl, as Carl was usually around Lori or Carol.
She knew, at first, Lori was a little tense about it, just out of instinct and not real concern. After a few moments, she just didn't even really notice Laura anymore when she was around Carl, in fact, she asked that if she could keep Carl with her when Lori had too much work piled up. She wasn't watching Carl for long, as Lori just needed a few moments to clear up some jobs around the farm.
Daryl didn't usually stick too close to her and she didn't stay with him at all times. Many times during that last few days, Daryl went out without Laura and Laura went to do what she could at the farm.
Most people weren't that busy, since it was so quiet around, the work leftover from the last few events was finally being finished up and it was getting quieter and more relaxed around camp... as much as it could be with the undead roving in the woods.
Laura didn't have too much she could do anymore, other than helping Sophia and learning how to hunt. She went on watch a lot during the nights now. Daryl didn't particularly like it but she was the best to be kept up there. Without feeling tired and being able to see at night, having Laura on watch was safer then having anyone else up on the RV.
Rick would try to keep on Daryl's good side, so he wouldn't have her on watch all the time, just for a large part of the night and sometimes not at all. Laura didn't mind being on watch, it gave her something to do. She wouldn't say anything, but while she did enjoy being around the person she cared about personally, it was rather boring to just sit somewhere and do nothing, just waiting for that person to wake up so she could actually do something.
So she convinced Daryl to let it go more and more, allowing her longer times on watch and more often. Not that she disliked being with him even while he was sleeping, she knew that having anyone alive in this situation was extremely lucky, but she just didn't want to waste time doing nothing when she could be helping; she knew she was a part of the group now, felt it without a doubt with what's happened in the last few weeks.
She progressively wanted more freedom, knowing that she could wander the world relatively freely, but felt compelled to remain where she was because of the people she's come to want in her life, want them safely around her. She couldn't ever do much for them, but whatever she had she'd give them.
At this point, she was finishing up with her last tracking lesson for the day, it was more of a "how to gut and skin" lesson, but it didn't start as such.
She was approaching the farmhouse in search of someone, preferably Rick who could tell her what she could do to help more so than anyone else around. However, as she took the first step onto the porch, Hershel had exited the farmhouse and came face to face with her.
She was still a little nervous around the Greene's, given they didn't know much about her condition or her history like the rest of the group did. Laura just paused and gave a cautious smile.
"Hey Hershel, how're you?" She attempted pleasantries, hoping that the older man wasn't too distraught with her. "I'm fine, Beth is doing better today as well." He was wiping his hands off with a little towel he kept in his pocket. Hershel looked out behind Laura at the group, who were working hard to earn keep. "It looks like your folks have really picked up around here. They're really helping out around here."
Laura turned around to see them all scattered about, each one trying to do their jobs right. "Yeah, it's been great. I'm really happy we found your farm. It is harsh out there, sometimes it gets really bad and we were certainly in a dark spot when we ran into you."
"So I hear," Hershel tucked the cloth back into his pocket, then gestured to the two deck chairs. Laura nodded and took a seat, Hershel not far behind her. "We never really had a chance to discuss about what happened with that little girl." He caught sight of Sophia playing with Carl, she was sensitive and a little slow behind Carl, but she was doing better than she had been.
"Ah right, you did want to talk about that, didn't you?" Laura winced, she only was able to give the Greene's a very glossed over explanation, as it was tense and everyone was tired from previous exertions.
"I would like to know some things, a few points that have eluded me that I would prefer be answered, if you can give them." He was trying to be polite about it, but she suspected that due to him letting them stay on his farm so far, that he was far more expectant to get answers.
Laura took a deep breath. "If I can I will definitely answer."
"First of all, how were you able to bring that little girl back?" He appeared to be in thought himself, less focused on Laura and more of the meaning of it all. "Before, I would have assumed you had medicine to cure this disease, but now... I realize what it really is and am caught between the answer being a cure or something else I do not understand or know of."
She tilted her head a little. "Well, I am not really able to cure the disease, as I mentioned earlier. This only uses the infection that already is established in a human host and allows for sentient thought and action again. I can do this through my unique situation." She sighed, Hershel finally turned to look at her directly. "I was really alive and human before the outbreak happened. I was bitten and infected, but before I... died from it, I went to my father, who, at that time, was an ex-scientist for the CDC and had medical training."
Hershel seemed to take this in, "Why didn't you go to the hospital or the authorities. That's usually what everyone does in an emergency."
"I wasn't exactly normal I guess, I panicked and took the most familiar source. I know it probably wasn't the best idea I've ever had, as he was not a good father to me." She shrugged nonchalantly, "I didn't want to run to the cops or the hospital, I was just scared. Someone tried to eat me and I wasn't in my right mind for making a good decision."
She took a moment, remembering her frantic thoughts after she escaped her infected neighbor. "Depending on your perspective I guess, it was either the right choice or the wrong one. He took me in and used me to find a cure." Hershel looked a little confused, but didn't speak up. "Subjected to various uncomfortable and painful tests, the suffering of dying from the infection was enough to make me happy to be dead. I woke up sometime later though and was like I am now, relatively alive. My heart beats, my blood flows through me, and I can think for myself, but I'm not really alive completely. My heart beat is so slow any doctor would say I was well and gone. I don't heal very well because my blood flow is so bad. I also don't really look very alive."
He nodded, glancing down a moment. "You are alive though and was able to give that little girl a second chance." He leaned forward to her a bit, trying to convince her of what he sees. "That's a chance she never would have had if you were not here to give it."
Laura cracked a smile. "I suppose, but I know now the full extent of the effects. I don't know what's gonna happen to her or if it'll even help her very much in the end..." She gave a defeated sigh, "Living like this isn't exactly easy or painless."
Hershel seemed interested, "What changes that little girl from being who she was before this? Aside from her rare experience and knowledge of it."
"Like what I said at the table. Our senses are heightened. We feel more, we're weakened, but somehow more resilient because the damage doesn't stop us so much as act as a small inconvenience." She rubbed a hand over her neck where a rather large and darkened bruise was. She had collected so many that she'd grown so accustomed to her black, blue, and purple skin that she forgot what she looked like before it all. "My injuries will not heal fast, they will last a very long time, unlike you, yours heal normally of course. Sophia will feel them, if she scrapes her knee, it will scar. If she cuts herself on a thorn, it will scar. If she breaks a bone, it can take a very, very abnormally long time to heal and it will take even longer to stop hurting."
He leaned back into the rocking chair, thinking on his next words. "... Those in the barn, the ones we kept. My son, my wife..." Laura spared him a saddened look, "I remember what you said, about having seen them in hopes to help them like Sophia. I want to know a little more about that, for closure, if you will humor me." Hershel was being kinder now, perhaps at first believing he had to be more forceful to get an answer, but now could see that Laura was willing to talk and give him what he needed.
"I did, Rick actually came and asked me to specifically." Hershel looked back up to her upon hearing Rick's involvement. "He really did want to help, to make things better and try to keep everyone safe at the same time. Y'know what they say, if you try to please everyone, you'll end up helping no one." He almost grinned at that. The weight of the conversation kept any real enjoyment out of it though. "I did look though, I didn't see Sophia in the barn when I first checked in though. She is small and I didn't go on the barn floor to look around..." Laura furrowed her brow, she hadn't seen Sophia in the barn at all, she was most likely under the platform she was standing on. "... The body decay's with no blood flow, it dies and, um... returns to the soil, if you will. Those wa-" She paused, glancing quickly to Hershel, "Those people were too far in the stages of deposition for me to help them. The injuries they suffered from were not curable by a medicine or a pill. If any of them had a chance to survive beyond where they were at that moment... they'd need extensive surgery and constant doctoral supervision... even then..."
"I understand, I just had to be sure." Hershel took a deep breath in and out. "I didn't want to leave any stone, as it goes. I figured that would be more than enough reason to just be glad that they're in a better place now, that they won't see the world in this state."
Laura bit her lip, feeling sorry over what happened at the barn. "Yeah, I suppose so." She wasn't really religious, she wasn't much of anything except for a doctor. No point in saying anything about it though, it doesn't matter in the slightest. "I so wish I could've done something more to help, I don't know what, just something... I don't know the extent I can do yet, but I intend to find out some day."
"I think that would be very helpful." Hershel offered her some comfort, placing a hand on her shoulder as he stood. "You've done quite an amazing feat the last few days, helping in the ways you have, no matter how small or how large." He looked out again to see the group doing chores, Glenn gathering harvesting all sorts of fruits and vegetables with Maggie. Lori and Carol cleaning everyone's clothing. Dale on watch, Andrea keeping the weapons in working condition. T-Dog and Rick off over looking a map of the farm, planning out the camp assortment for better protection and quicker response for walker attacks.
It was all just jumbled up work, Laura dabbled in curing a child, watching another child, being posted on night watch, doing various domestic jobs, practicing hunting and feeding the group, and having her medical skill on call. She did her runs with Glenn in town and reduced the risk of walker attacks when in a small group. She smiled rather brightly, "I can be useful, at least, sometimes."
"You've done a lot around here." Hershel returned her smile, albeit not as beaming as hers was. "Perhaps you can come around more often and let everyone know you're still out here. You disappear so often, I hear people wondering where you went."
Laura chuckled, "Well, I'm usually with Daryl, you won't see him a lot around as he prefers to be alone, or, at least with me nearby." He nodded at that, "I see, we would still like to see more of you. What you did for that little girl was nothing short of a miracle, when I even questioned my faith."
She felt a little flustered, "That's really kind of you to say."
"Are you a religious woman, Laura?" She looked up quickly, knowing he was and she wasn't... She didn't want anything to really part them in this walker infested world, let alone religion. "I'm not particularly, sir."
He didn't seem phased at all, Laura mused that he must be used to the idea of the survivors not being very god-fearing when their world was a constant place of terror. "I understand, this world is very challenging. However, I always seem to find something to remind me of my faith, something to solidify it for me. Whether it be that little girl playing out there, that knowing what this world has come to, that my daughters are still here with me."
She grinned, Hershel was very dedicated, but even he wasn't so stalwart. "From our perspective, you were very lucky. Having some family left when so many don't have anyone."
"And that makes me even more thankful that I am here with my family." Hershel took one last look around, "I need to go see Rick about some things, I suppose we'll see each other around soon." He turned and left her on the porch, like he said, he went straight to Rick, who caught sight of him and greeted him with a handshake.
Laura stood, a little too fast, her aching joints from her fall in the woods were still noticeable. It wasn't hindering, just a little sore. She shook it off and continued on her way into the farmhouse. In the back of her mind, she felt strange entering, almost like she was an intruder. She remembered all the things she worried about before, her appearance, her history, hoping that people would give her the benefit of the doubt.
Some part of her still felt like a walker entering someone's home in search for food, she still held her hunger in her, the aching need to eat at all times, but it was so dull that she didn't even have to ignore it, it just seemed to come and go.
"I haven't left yet." Laura groaned, rolling her eyes shut. The Voice was getting louder in her head, more frequent, and it's words felt more than just words now. She would be lying if she said that she didn't feel like the Voice was actually becoming part of her consciousness.
I figured as much, but I wasn't thinking about you anyways. She continued on, trying to find something to do helpful around the house. Anything to get her mind off of the Voice that decided to appear again.
"I want to help you, to give you a better life. This circular existence you lead now is pointless and dull. It's worthless." Laura should've known not to think about these things, about being a walker, it seemed to entice the Voice to appear and speak to her more and more.
Laura stopped in the kitchen, "Don't you even dare..." It warned, seeing through her eyes and knowing her thoughts. Laura smiled.
The kitchen was a mess, most likely from dinner and breakfast the Greene's and the group shared. The dishes were piled up, some spices left out, various parts of the kitchen out of order. So Laura opted to clean it up.
"I can't believe this, you are a thinking, healing walker and you decide to clean a goddamn kitchen..." It growled, "This is the fucking zombie apocalypse and you are doing a twelve-year-old's chores!"
I am helping, that's all that matters. Laura was grinning to herself, the Voice didn't like it at all. It's anger and helplessness was entertaining Laura as she started to wash the Greene's dishes. The Voice had to sit there and take it, Laura didn't care, it annoyed her anyways and that's all it ever was to her. She felt more secure with her group then she's ever felt with anybody in her life. The Voice wasn't going to ruin it for her, she just had to deal with it complaining every now and then.
"I am not helpless." It ground out, it felt decidedly more distraught than ever before. Laura felt that discomfort, but didn't mind so much as roll her eyes while piling up some cleaned dishes before moving onto the larger dishes like the Greene's cookware. She rather enjoyed the mindless labor, basic everyday chores. It felt good to do them again. Especially after having worked on firing a crossbow and learning how to find things, kill them, then prepare them to be eaten.
"I do not have to 'take it'." Laura giggled a little, it was so angry and Laura finally knew how to get back at it.
"Do not doubt my strength."
Laura's arm tensed, but she couldn't move it. Frowning, she attempted to bend her fingers, but instead her hand stretched out and she ran her nails down the back of a pan, the screeching noise was quick and sharp. Her eyes went wide, Laura saw the clawed marks on the back of the pan, they were deep considering it was an iron pan.
She had lost control of her arm, she didn't claw the pan, she had no control over her arm. She held it still now, but she had it under control again. She carefully and slowly turned her arm around, inspecting her hand which was relaxed now. Her nails had black iron shredding on them.
"Do not doubt my graciousness."
Laura gulped and set the iron pan down and backed away from the sink.
"Laura?" She spun around, only to see Maggie standing there looking at her with interest. "You okay there?"
She managed a strained smile, "I'm fine Maggie, just got my fingers caught between some pots, kinda' squished them. They're fine though." She held her hand up and wiggled her fingers. Maggie smiled back, "Alright, I thought I heard a loud noise, thought something happened. Thanks for helping out with the kitchen though." She gestured towards the messy kitchen.
"No problem, just figured I should help out some more. I'm usually out getting lessons from Daryl, but sometimes it's nice to take a break with the smaller things." Laura relaxed, she still felt sick to her stomach. "I'll finish up here, then I'm going to go back and practice some more."
Maggie pointed outside, "I'm gonna go take care of the livestock, one of the fences broke and we gotta get out there to fix it. Apparently Dad wants to see if your group can help with stuff like that, so I have to show someone how to do it. Gonna be fun." She said a little sarcastically, laughing to herself. "Checking the fence is probably one of the most boring jobs we have."
Laura imitated Maggie's mood, trying to seem less stressed then she was. "Well, maybe someday I can take that job off your hands. I don't mind extra work."
"Yeah, we got enough to do around this farm as it is." She shrugged, "I better get going, I'll see you around Laura."
She just nodded, "See ya Maggie."
Once Maggie had left her sight, Laura sighed deeply. "It's okay, don't worry. I'm only ever here to help you."
Laura bit her lip. That day at the barn... With Shane... When I defended myself, that wasn't me was it... It was you.
She could feel the Voice rising to accept the accusation with glee. "Now how did you come to that conclusion? He was attacking you wasn't he?"
Leaning over the island, Laura shook her head, she just knew it. It didn't feel like something I would do, I mean, I know self-defense, I know how to protect myself. I didn't need to revert to... that. How did you do it? How did you make me think I did it?
"It wasn't hard." It had an obvious smile in its tone. "I just made you think what I wanted you to think. I made you believe that it was your only hope, that he'd kill you otherwise. He probably would've done, so I didn't have to do much in that regard. That being said, I did have to give you suggestion to not use your old self-defense courses in order to fight against him."
But... I didn't even remember them... I couldn't recall anything about them. Laura was worried, she remembered thinking at the very moment Shane's grip on her throat tightened. She had no memory of them, like they never happened. I remember them now... The classes were on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights at 6:30PM... I usually couldn't make the Thursday courses because of work... My teachers were Katherine Banderas and Danny Christopherson. They were really nice people and let me skip the Thursday classes and sometimes the Friday classes because they knew my job was demanding.
"That's right, you took that course for a good year before moving onto some more advances courses." The Voice answered, Laura had only now remembered them. She was so thankful to Kathy and Danny for being so kind about it and never complained about her missing any classes.
I had dinner with them... they were almost friends to me... I never took a chance though, I was anti-social. I didn't like being around people... but I wasn't the mouse I thought I was... Laura stood up straight, What else am I not remembering?
"Wouldn't you love to know." It was taunting her, Laura felt a new feeling come over her.
She wasn't the helpless sap she thought she was. She didn't enjoy too much company, but she had some friends. Kathy and Danny among them. She had been invited to some of their parties... They were married, but they couldn't have children, Kathy had been in a car accident when she was a child. She was invited to the wedding, she went, it was a small affair, close friends and family...
"I was their friend. They were my best friends..." Laura said to herself aloud. "They were great people, they were kind to me and I was almost always around them... But... why didn't I have more friends?"
"Oh you did. You had quite a few." Laura was almost in tears, she couldn't remember her own friends... "Your father saw to that."
What. Laura was dead still. My father did what.
"He wasn't as you remember him."
What do you mean. Laura demanded. I want to know. Tell me who he was.
"You will find out. Just not now."
Laura turned around, seeing the pan she scraped in the sink. She began to start again on her chore. The Voice was silent and calm after that. It's power play over her satisfied its needs. Laura was on the verge of crying and tearing something apart. She felt like herself more than she had in a long while... There was something wrong...
She had to think now. Who was her father really? What did she remember of him? How bad was he? Was all she remembered was the best times?... Was he even worse than what she thought she knew about him.
What exactly happened to her, what wasn't she able to remember anymore?
Time flew by, Laura was completely immersed in her thoughts. She couldn't shake her feelings, what the Voice had proven to her. It was worse than she thought. It could control her, it could give her thoughts that weren't her own... but she would believe they were. She was so unsure, was anything she felt the last few months real? What part of this was just the Voice erasing thoughts and memories? What was the Voice changing her opinion of?
Was anything she was thinking about her own?
Laura had finished the kitchen quicker then she thought she was going to. She didn't feel fulfilled, she felt empty and, for the first time in a long while, she felt exhausted to the extent that she just wanted to stop for a while. Stop everything and just ignore the outside world.
She had to go on, there were people out there who wanted her around, that wanted to know she was alright.
There was nothing Laura could do to prove to herself that she was relatively harmless now. What Andrea said about her being dangerous or a risk to the group... It was more of the truth then Andrea ever realized. Laura could very well be a grave threat. They trusted her, let her around their children, into their homes... let her lay with them as they slept away the night.
What have I done... Laura walked outside the farmhouse. So many things seemed dull now, the group still working to help the Greene family. Maggie in the field with Glenn, T-Dog, and Hershel at a fence where the cows grazed.
Laura felt how cold she truly was... Her body didn't produce heat like the others, she was always so cold, but she never felt it until now. Not to mention her hunger... It was back again, not as strong as it was before, but it was powerful and her eyes rested on the group, as if she was hunting.
She gritted her teeth. She had to get away for a while, she had to get away from them all before she tore herself apart.
As she walked away from the farmhouse, she was stopped by Rick.
Laura didn't want to talk, she was too lost in her own thoughts. It was messing with her something bad, but she didn't want anyone asking questions or telling anyone she hears a voice in her head.
"Laura," She paused and turned to face him, hiding her internal struggles by smiling at him. "Hey Rick, what's up?"
Rick caught up to her, she realized that she was moving rather fast. "I need to talk to you about something." He looked over to the shed then back to Laura. "And feel free to say no, I have no right to ask this, but I feel I have to."
Laura's attention was effectively stolen from her earlier worries. "What is it Rick? Y'know I don't turn anything I can do to help down."
"I know, but this is a little different... perhaps even dangerous." She nodded, "I need help with Randall."
She raised a brow, "Randall? Aren't we releasing him in a few days?" Rick grimaced, "We are, that hasn't changed. With the risk involved, I am a little worried about going out there without knowing how many walkers we'll come across."
He wants me to help let Randall go. Laura concluded rather easily. "Do it, go with them."
Laura was internally growling, she didn't want anything to do with what the Voice wanted. "Do it." It urged her, it was far less friendly than it had been in the past.
"Laura?"
She nodded, "You want me to go with."
He suspected she might not want to go with, knowing that it would be rather risky... and that Shane was going. That much was for certain. Rick had talked to the group about it already and Laura was glad to have a day where Shane wasn't at the farm, to go with them instead?... And the Voice wanted her to go...
Red flags went up everywhere in her head. "Why do you want me though?"
"Because when we get to a place we want to leave him, if it goes without a hitch, we won't need you." He frowned, "But if something happens, if walkers show up, I'm going to need you there. Knowing that just by standing by you that the walkers won't come after us would be a great help."
"Daryl won't like it."
Rick kicked the dirt under his boot, "Yeah, yeah I know." He looked off in the direction of Daryl and Laura's camp. "It's just to be sure, Lori keeps telling me to talk to you about it. She thinks it's too much of a risk for me and Shane. That we'd wander off, mostly that I might get hurt or worse. We know that you can hide us in a group of walkers and they won't notice us, just like Atlanta."
"What about Shane?" Laura asked, the weight of the question had clearly been on Rick's mind before. "I have talked to him, before the barn and after. I think he's getting the picture. He's backing off more and more lately, he's not bothered anyone else and has been working harder around the farm. I know that's not enough security, I intend to have a good talk with him on the way to dropping off Randall. If he tries anything against you... I'll handle it."
Laura had a sad look on her face, she knew what he meant. It was getting so serious with Shane that Rick felt he had to do something drastic to keep peace. Even if it meant stopping his old friend for good, permanently. She just looked down, things were getting so messed up so fast she couldn't keep up with it all anymore.
Laura could help even with Shane in the mix, she could end up saving Rick... subsequently Shane. Rick was well worth that though of course. She just didn't know if she could convince Daryl that it was alright... and there was still the matter of the Voice that was telling her to go.
Was it her agreeing to go? Or was it the Voice suggesting her without her knowing about it again...?
"I get it, you can take all the time you want to answer. You don't have to go, we can do it ourselves. I don't want you to feel like you should." Rick rested a hand on her shoulder, "I don't want you force you to do anything you don't have to Laura."
She smiled gratefully. "It's okay Rick, if I can help, I will." Rick gave her a curious look, "I'll go with you."
He had a very small grin, like he was surprised at her answer. "You never turn down anyone, do you?"
With a big smile, Laura shook her head. "Guess not. When do we leave?"
"I was planning on leaving the day after next, in the morning. It'll have been a week, Hershel said it'd take that long for his leg to heal and for him to walk again. He's shown he can almost walk, still limping, but come time to let him go, he'll be fine." Laura caught sight of Daryl on his way from his tent, coming towards her and Rick.
"I'll tell him, don't worry." He gave her a sympathetic look, "If he's too much to handle on this, just remember, you can still decide not to go."
"Thanks Rick, but it'll be fine. I'll see you later." Rick stepped away from her, "I've got some things to take care of, so just relax until it's time to head out."
The two parted ways and, once turning around to see Daryl crossing the fields, Laura took a deep breath in. She's going to have to be very convincing with him. She would go anyways, no matter what, but she didn't want to cause him any stress over her. He was her greatest life line in this new, strange world. She would show that she can take care of herself though.
Especially since she remembered she can fight, at least, against another human. Somewhat anyways, she still only had parts of her memory of her self-defense courses. She specifically took them because she lived in Atlanta, a very busy, loud city and she walked home from work on late nights.
As far as she knew, she never really had to use her training yet.
"Hey," She greeted a little cautiously, he stopped a little in front of her. "Hey, girl."
"We gotta talk about something..." She didn't want to worry him or make him uncomfortable too fast. He gave her a look, sending a look to Shane in the distance. "No, he didn't do anything."
He looked down, catching sight of her hand, the black iron mixed with some blood from raking her nails down the pan. He didn't know that and instantly grabbed her hand. "What happened to your hand?"
She didn't even notice that the nail was damaged from tearing the pan. "Oh, nothing, just banged my fingers in the kitchen while I was cleaning." She blew it off, she hadn't felt them hurting at all. He bought it easy, there wasn't much anyways, just a small cut under her nails. "What did ya wanna talk about then?"
Laura licked her lips, "Rick came to me today, asked me to go with him..." She gave him a moment to process what that could mean, "... to let Randall go."
"No," He came to an instant decision, "No way."
"I want to go, to help." He gave a very shaky sigh, one of agitation. "With what I can do, how I can help uniquely. I could really help them, if they get stuck in a bad situation, I could even end up saving them." He gave her a look. "Them?"
With a big gulp, she bared her teeth in a frown, "Rick, Shane, and Randall."
"Shane." He spat the name like it was poison to him. She knew that's really the only problem, like she knew before, he wasn't babying her, he just didn't want to risk her health without a very, very good reason or if it was unavoidable. "You wanna go with him there?"
"Look, I don't care about Shane. I really don't care if he dies out there, but Rick... he's my friend and so is Lori and Carl. I don't want them to lose a father because I didn't want to risk a little inconvenience or work. I can really help here, this is one of the reasons I am here." She stepped closer to him, resting a tentative hand on his chest. "I need to help, I know that I'm not the toughest out there, I'm not exactly the best at anything around here, but this is something I can do and no one else can do."
Daryl gave her a stern look, "I know what'cha mean. I know why." He said that about as harshly as he talked about Shane, not because they angered him like Shane did, but because he didn't want to swallow it. "I don't want ya to go."
That was probably harder to say then anything else he's said to her the last few days.
"I know, I just want to help this group, no matter what it takes." She put her arms around him, pulling him into a very careful hug. He didn't really move, his hands were full after all. "This means risking as much as the rest of the group, giving it my all, even if I get a few cuts and bruises in the process. I'll be fine though, where they are going, I'm at my best."
He huffed, "You can nail that bastard anyways," He smirked, "You're tougher than 'im."
"Damn straight I am." She leaned back, releasing him and sending him a thankful smile. "Are you alright with this? I don't want to go if it'll means I'll be causing you too much stress over it."
"I'll be fine, girl." He almost scoffed at her suggestion. "Should stay and protect the group, with Rick and Shane gone, someone's gotta make sure walkers don't stroll up in here and eat 'em all."
She chuckled, "Good idea."
"Gonna go talk to Rick about it though, comin' with?" He asked her, he was overprotective of her before, but after everything cooled down and he let go of that protectiveness a little, he wasn't so caught up on whether or not she's on her own around the farm, or with other people. Aside from Shane of course.
"I think I'm gonna head back to the camp, you caught something I assume?" He nodded, "You can get to work with 'em if ya want, they'll be dinner tonight for the group."
"Then that's what I'll do." She gave him a wink before heading off towards their tent. Daryl was making a direct line to Rick, no doubt to have a rather straight talk about Laura going with Rick and Shane. Daryl wasn't as overprotective as he was before, but he was still going to cover all his bases when it came to her safety. If Shane was involved, he'd cover those bases with force. Rick had shown Daryl that he was going to give Laura the same safety that Daryl would.
So he was more tolerant of the sheriff, still very unfamiliar with him though.
When finally out of sight of them all, Laura felt like she was going to burst into pieces.
The Voice was bothering her, she looked at her hand and there were a few very small cuts on them, iron was a tough metal after all. That was more then any walker could do, she had some kinda of unnatural ability like the walkers, the sounds she could make, the instinctual reaction to certain things, her senses, she wasn't strong, but the Voice could use her body to its best capabilities.
Laura hurried to the small camp area, a few small critters hanging from the lines between the trees, all fresh and ready for preparation.
She got to work, Daryl kept his knife for skinning and gutting at the camp for her occasionally, this time it was on top of the log that they used to sit in front of the fire, when they had one.
She tried to get her mind off of what she'd learned, in hopes of stopping whatever this was from continuing. The Voice wouldn't go away so easily, she knew that. Laura didn't know what she'd forgotten, she didn't know what her memories were anymore. How many things have been taken out of context and used against her?
As if the Voice choice to amuse her and answered a question quickly.
Laura was heading home, she hated going home, she hated her house. She was a few days off of her twelfth birthday and she dreaded where she was headed.
She was made to walk to the nearby pharmacy and pick up things on a list, she'd done this a few times before, but it was never this bad. It was dark, raining, and they lived in the worst place in downtown Atlanta, they weren't able to afford much.
Soaking to the bone, she carried the bags dutifully, they were heavy and she was rather weak due to her life at home. She wasn't allowed to eat much every day, she knew that they couldn't keep buying a lot, so Laura just thought that it was hard for them to buy enough food for her to eat.
She worked hard, heading up the road where her home was.
The first thing she saw was flashing red and blue lights, they were at her apartment building. Laura really didn't want to find out why they were there, people got hurt in the city, in this part especially. Which is another reason she didn't like going out at night, it was dangerous out here and while she hadn't actually been hurt by anyone out in the city at night yet, she was very nervous about everything.
Laura ignored the cops leaning against one of the police cars and just took the stairs straight up to her level. Her arms and legs were so tired by the time she reached the fourth floor.
Opening the door, Laura saw the cops on this floor... at her door.
With a gulp, Laura cautiously approached her apartment. The cops just turned to her, seeing her trying to enter the door. "Hey sweetie." One smiled at her friendly, "Do you live here?" He asked and it made her worried.
She didn't like to speak to people, it made her mother mad sometimes. So she just nodded, clutching the bags tighter to her.
"Can we help you with those?" He offered a hand out, but Laura just recoiled slightly and shook her head. The cop's eyes flashed oddly, something she hadn't seen before. "It's okay, we're here to help you. You won't have to worry anymore."
Laura blinked blankly, slowly turning to her door which was open and inside were two more cops and a woman in a suit. Her mother was sneering at them, shaking her head and scoffing. She didn't know what was happening, why were these people here? Would her mother blame her when they left?
"Excuse me." The cop that had spoken to her in the hall stolen the attention of the three people inside and her mother. "She's here."
Laura frowned as everyone's eyes came to rest on her. She was scared, she didn't know what was going on and why they all were so interested in her.
The woman in the suit smiled softly and carefully came towards Laura, "Hello there," She kneeled down to Laura's level, "My name is Whitney and I'm here to help." She waved one of the cops to her, suggesting them to take the bags away from Laura. "It's okay, you won't need those anymore. In fact, you'll never have to make another run like that ever again."
Laura perked up at that, "Really?"
She nodded, "Really." She held a hand out, "What is your name?"
"I'm Laura." She was too nervous still to shake Whitney's hand, she felt even more scared when she noticed the burning eyes of her mother from behind Whitney.
The woman caught on quickly, giving Laura a glance over, she had all she needed. "Tell you what Laura, why don't you go with these two fine policemen, they're going to take you outside and when we're done here, we'll go get you ice cream. How about that?" She gave her a large smile.
Laura nodded, "Mmkay."
The policemen from the hall led her out of the apartment, Laura could barely see the woman turning back around to her mother before the door was closed and all she heard was her mother yelling.
She took hold of one of the policeman's hand tightly, scared of the sound she could clearly hear from her mother. Thinking that she had to go back to that and take whatever anger her mother had at these people.
"Hey, it's okay sweetie. There's a very special person waiting outside for you." He shook her hand a little, trying to reassure her. She was confused, she had no idea what these people were doing around her.
She was almost twelve, but she hadn't any experience in the world, no real education. She lived in that apartment, rarely ever venturing out her door, knowing that her mother didn't like it. So she knew no one aside from her mother and the kind person as the register at the pharmacy. The only people she ever had any contact with.
"He can't wait to see you, I promise, you're going to like him." The cop smiled at her, "He's a very good man, he's going to give you a new home, a better one, and a much happier one."
Laura had no real idea what he meant, but she wasn't too concerned at the moment as they had just exited the apartment complex and were now standing outside near the cop cars. She looked around for this 'special man' the cop mentioned.
As quickly as it took to blink, there was a man in front of her. She was alarmed, he had raced up to meet her. She shrank away, never having had so much contact with people, she was scared, but still a curious child who wanted to know everything.
"Hey honey." He was kneeling in the rain, the cop was now holding an umbrella above them. His pants were getting soaked from kneeling in a puddle, but looking at this man, he might as well have been floating. "Hey there," He held a hand out to her, "Do you remember me?"
She gave him a wide frown and shook her head.
"Well, that's alright." He was beaming at her, he was crying but she didn't know why. "I'm your dad." Laura stared at him, so very lost that she hadn't a clue where to begin. "Yeah, I'm your dad and don't worry, you can come home with me and never have to worry again."
He came closer to her and hugged her tightly to her. Laura didn't understand what was in store for her anymore.
No more old apartment, no more mother, no more late night runs to the pharmacy alone.
Laura had no idea how her life would change come the next few years living with her father, but as she rode in the cop car, ice cream in her hand, and her father enjoying an ice cream cone with her, she came out of her shell quickly.
Laura gasped in shock, a very old and forgotten memory rushing back to her.
She didn't know where to begin, she didn't know what was happening. She felt almost sick, she had lived with her mother... Her parents divorced before she was old enough to know how to walk. Her mother had custody of her and Laura knew nothing about her father at all, not until she was in the beginning of her pre-teen years.
"I know much and you... You know nothing anymore."
Laura wasn't even aware she had cried, as if she was experiencing the event over again, but she knew what it meant... at least that part.
Her father came to get her, to save her from that dark apartment in the worst part of the city. She wasn't happy before that, her mother was cruel and cold, she hated her and she completely forgot about it all. Some part of her knew it, there was something she could never see about why she felt things, like her memory of rushing to her father's home... if she hated him... why would she do such a thing?
Laura froze, she tried to remember, in all her memories, the moments where she was hurt by her father... she couldn't see his face. The home she thought they were in... She couldn't see her father's apartment. It was larger than her mother's, it was cleaner of course, and it was cleaned by a maid her father hired.
Her memories were wrong, it wasn't her father she remembered locking her in a closet, neglecting to feed her days at a time, or hitting her.
It was her mother.
What did I do... I ran from him... I needed his help, I hated my mother, I loved my father... but I thought... Laura was sobbing, she was wrong. Her own thoughts were wrong. She didn't know what part of her memory was right anymore...
"You had to know again someday." The Voice mused to her, "I kept the truth hidden from you, I did it to protect you. I was there from the beginning. I've shaped your future so far. It's about time you started understanding that I am more a part of you than you ever realized."
The Voice... It wasn't a voice anymore. It never was just a voice and Laura knew it now.
It was living, it made decisions for her, it could control her, her thoughts, memories, emotions, and her physical body was at the mercy of this strange instinctual entity inside her head.
"I am you. I am the part of you that wanted to fight back." Laura looked up, she could see Daryl heading back into camp. She didn't want anyone to know, not about this. This would ruin everything. "I will never leave you, I will always be here; I will do whatever is necessary to keep us, you and me, alive. Even if I have to force you to do it."
It faded away, Laura tried to compose herself.
The Voice wasn't just words in her head now and she had to keep this to herself. No one could ever know, this could destroy her, and if it ever threatened the group... She could never risk that, she wanted to live, she had to do something.
She needed time, to think, to process this new information, and to find someway to fix it.
With Daryl nearing, Laura wiped her face dry and restarted on preparing dinner. As if nothing happened, but when he arrived, it was all she could think about.
Foresthunter:
I am trying to work, I've been so sick and busy the last few... ugh, for so long that I had no time or energy to write anymore. :c
Syria13:
I have a plan for where/what Laura will be doing in the next season+, but you'll just have to see who lives and who dies... or loses limbs. :P
Virgil Stein:
Yeaaahhh reviews can be hard to earn, but I love even getting one every so often. So thanks for reviewing! :D
Nyxeka:
I am still trying to write... but I'd like to answer your reviews.
Yes, this is pretty much a complete TV show writing with a few new characters and some situations changing, but there are different kinds of stories out there. Some based solely on the show/game/movie/book with no real variation in plot line or story telling.
Others who morph different forms of the same story, I.E.: Morphing plots/characters/scenes of the Walking Dead TV show with the Walking Dead comic book series.
And ones who create AU's, creating their own plots and characters, etc. etc.
Of course some stories do what they do and while they take place in the solid plot of the series, the actual Fanfic follows other people elsewhere, doing other things. :P
I have done AU's, Crossovers, and solid follow-up's to the fandoms I write for. Curative is a more follow-up like story, obviously.
However, all of these can be combined, twisted, and rewritten. All of these forms are designed for the writer's taste, who hopes that someone else might enjoy it too. :3
It's a lotta fun to do all these and combinations of them. I absolutely adore doing my Transformers AU, I also love the relaxing, character-complex related writing in Curative. :3
All just different tastes and ways to enjoy reading a writing!
I'm glad it's starting to grow on you though, it does become a bit more complicated as time goes on from the earlier chapters I know. It's just a slow starter, but that's fine for me. x3
Shirosaki15:
I'm definitely trying! :D
Savannah's Angels:
Thanks! I wasn't trying to recreate the Walking Dead, just add some writer's depth, perhaps even things I saw in the show and the characters, while bringing it all full circle with Laura. She's a rather easy character to write for, but her situations are actually very challenging, because she has no brute force or any real skill with a firearm, she has to be more cunning rather than strength. :P
Colgate Cavity Protection:
Weee! The voices in my head! ;3
But oh yeah, that voice is going to be a big concern. It starts off small, but for Laura, the Voice is just getting started.
Sophia may or may not develop her own "Voice", I won't tell! :D
LittleMeepnook:
This is the first review I've ever gotten concerning me as a person. However, I am doing well now. I spent a year very ill, but near the end it really faded away. Unfortunately, it went away right as I had finished my GED and had to start looking into colleges. x.x
Thank you for asking though. :D
AthenaB:
I think a lot of people are interested in the Voice, it's a very strange "creature" (for lack of a better term) and will definitely play a larger part in later chapters.
Sophia's part in this story is completely dark at this point, as in the TV show Sophia died so of course reader's don't know what's going to happen regarding her now... But in the comic book series Sophia didn't die, she even outlived her mother. :O
Sooooooo... we'll see where all of this leads us. (btw, if you have any way to listen to an evil villainous laughter followed by thunder and lightning, now would be a good time to listen to it) x3
LoneWolfPack:
Thanks, I'm looking forward to building off of these latest chapters. :3
Miss Pibbles:
Thanks! I know that it's strange in the beginning and usually people are thrown off by it's seemingly Mary Sue-ish-ness or, more like, the possibility of being Mary Sue-ish. However, in my personal opinion (of which I am biased, so take it how you will), Laura isn't Mary Sue, she's very real and has many, many problems. Not mental/physical problems that are extreme and so rare in real life that people forget it exists, but I mean normal problems, like any other person. :3
Laura is a strange character to write for, but very fun.
Kira Tsumi:
Well, you're in luck! :3
LittleMeep:
Yeah, Rick and Laura's friendship definitely raised red flags for Daryl at first, but it was all just their bond with the struggles of being dropped into a ruined, apocalyptic world together, with no real clear path through it. :3
They'll build on this as time goes on, of course.
Amethiste:
Thank you, I hope this lives up to expectations! :D
ScornedxRose:
Yesss, it's getting so fun it should be illegal. x3
Anyways, Laura is going to blend in more with the group as time goes on, but let's not forget what we know about this season and the next. Limits are going to be tested and I fully intend on pushing my characters to their breaking points. :3
I'm trying to keep things clear, sometimes when it gets complicated things are lost in the mix, but generally I can clean up any messiness with my writing and the series of events taking place.
I expected a lot more questions about what happened when and where and how... also why... but I was really surprised to see that people read so finely tuned to the story that they were able to pick all the little details up. So I'm glad that I don't have to do a big Q&A about it! It was nice to see things work out, I will try to be as clear as I can possibly be with future chapters... Unless I remain vague or ambiguous for a reason. ;3
Kschu02:
Yeah, her father is a real piece of work. Oh well, what'cha gonna do? Laura was born with him in her life and, while he was cold and cruel, he inadvertently saved other lives just by giving her part of hers back. :3