Chapter Fifteen
Jennifer's Revelation
Wind Elk and Jennifer sat in his office after their weekly meeting, listening with an amused expression to Jennifer's perceived problem and to all of the experiments she had tried.
"We did finally get my hat to the point where it could sort the right student in the right house with about ninety percent accuracy before dinner," Jennifer went on, and he nodded again, taking a sip of tea. "Severus ran tests of his own, and he decided it was quite accurate for what it was. Of course, even with the Relative Perspective charm, it didn't ever do rhymes or anything of the sort, even after I tried putting my brother's perspective on it," Jennifer said. "I also couldn't get it to behave like the Ravenclaw statue, who communicates through riddles but does have a finite number of them unless Janus Craw takes the time to update them. And my hat certainly doesn't show any signs of attachment or affection like the Sorting Hat shows towards my children. It didn't even have the defiant attitude that he gives the faculty members from time to time... and yet you're staring at me right now... as if you find it incredibly funny that I can't wrap my head around this," Jennifer said accusingly, glaring at him.
"Yes, because you seem to be wrestling with the fact that the Sorting Hat has a spirit," Wind said. "But everything has a spirit, whether it's alive by your definitions or not. Everything that touches life, gives life, or has a true form in nature has a spirit." Jennifer sighed with exasperation. "Yes, I know, you are going to say something about that being my culture's belief and not yours, but despite your struggle, you know it just as well as I do on a subconscious level. And the proof is all around you."
"What do you mean by that?" Jennifer asked with exasperation.
"The paintings, Jennifer," Wind Elk explained with a smile.
"Oh, well yes, paintings are special in that they capture the essence of the person they portray," Jennifer replied, Wind smiling skeptically. "Once the ghost paint is activated, the artist asks their subject about their feelings about things and other people and talk about their past, and the collection of all those memories and feelings gets translated to the painting so that they can mimic their subject. I've been debating with Severus if that's why the Hat works the way it does, because it's meant to store memories over time..."
"No, no... stop, Jennifer, you're rationalizing by explaining how the item works," Wind protested, cringing slightly and shaking his head.
"Of course I am, that's the point. I'm trying to figure out how it works..."
"No, you're looking about this the wrong way around. Little Squirrel, go fetch the Rogue Painting," Wind requested. Jennifer glanced up as the Jennifer portrait next to her mentor left her frame. "Jennifer, I know you are not a doctor, but you are a Potion Master, so you understand how humans generally work, do you not?" he asked, Jennifer grew thoughtful. "Let us pretend that you are studying my gift of Wild Magic for the first time and want to know how it works. You would start, I assume, by considering my mixed heritage, as would only be natural," he said, and Jennifer nodded at that. "Perhaps you have questions on how that effected my blood makeup, if there's anything detectable my Muggles, or if it's tied to my longevity. Perhaps my heart rate is different, or I have a mutation that needs to be tested. And if I do have a mutation, perhaps you can duplicate it in some way, because it would be very interesting to attempt to make a copy of me so you have one to experiment on to see just what makes me different. That way, you don't have to worry about damaging the original."
"Ouch, please, no more, you're taking this too far. It sounds like you're accusing me of attempting to dissect you," Jennifer protested.
"Let's just suppose that you are of the sort of person that doesn't care about me as an individual, Jennifer. What if you were to dissect me with no more feeling than you would a bowl of efts or frogs that you were preparing to preserve for your potion phials," Wind continued sternly despite her protest. "Would doing so truly accomplish what it is that you were attempting to find out? Would taking me apart piece by piece, inspecting every part, researching every detail about my life and background, would that information truly get you any closer to understanding who I am as a wizard, as a bear spirit, or even as a person?"
"No," Jennifer admitted. He nodded with an approving smile.
"What you are truly looking for is something that you cannot quantify in such a way. Physical things have spirits, but spirits are not physical. Taking something apart may tell you on the surface how something works, but that doesn't mean you grasp what it truly is. You must put away your tools and stop thinking in such terms; there are only two tools that are truly open to you in this matter; the deep understanding that comes from within your own spirit of what something is, and learning to your trust your own spirit and what it's been telling you all along."
"I don't understand what you mean by that last bit," Jennifer replied.
Wind smiled and pointed to a painting of a ripening corn field. The Rogue Painting was in the frame listening, attempting to figure out what was going on. He gestured questioningly.
"Don't use sign language, Rogue, I am demonstrating something to Jennifer," Wind said, and Rogue nodded at that. "Can you tell me what the Rogue is thinking?" Jennifer sighed with exasperation.
"He wants to know what you're up to and is awaiting further instructions, but I would have thought that'd have been obvious anyway," Jennifer replied.
"I am not the one missing the obvious," Wind chuckled, then smiled at the Rogue. "Rogue, tell Jennifer who you are in your own words," he suggested. "Jennifer, you relay to me what he is thinking." Jennifer sighed.
"I am the image of Severus Snape, also referred to as the Rogue Painting, and I am your secretary painting while you're working," Jennifer relayed.
"Other than being a painting, Rogue, can you site differences between yourself and the current Severus?" Wind asked.
"'He's on old codger.' Really, Severus. I think he meant something more substantial than that," Jennifer scolded, then relayed again. "'While I jest, Severus has come a long way in recent years, learning to respect those around him and trust those under them to do their jobs and support him,'" Jennifer went on, smiling softly at that. "However, when it comes to violin, he is most decidedly an amateur – that's not fair, Severus! He has a lot less time than you to practice!"
He also prefers less intellectually strenuous private activities when he does manage to find free time...
"I'm not relaying that!" Jennifer snapped, but the slight blush in her cheeks must have tipped something off, because Wind laughed at her reaction. "Sorry, Wind, he can be rather difficult when he's in a mood," Jennifer explained, and the Rogue gave her a sinister smile.
"It is enough to continue this conversation," Wind decided tolerantly. "Because now that I've had a demonstration of one of your talents, I need to ask you a question. How are you doing that?" he asked. "How are you able to read his expression as if he were a real person?"
"I have no idea," Jennifer admitted.
"I have never met any other Truth Seeker who could read a painting as if it were real, you know. I remember the first time I saw you do it at school during the art exhibit. Do you remember what you told me?" he asked.
"Not really," Jennifer admitted.
"You told me that you've always been able to do it because you used to have a lot of painting friends in the house you grew up in," he explained.
"Oh, I see. Well, I can see myself explaining it that way for simplicity," Jennifer admitted. "You see, my father often walked me around the manor and introduced me to some of the safer portraits of my relatives, so that I could put a face to the names I was being taught about our family tree. I do remember speaking to some of them to learn more about them."
"Ah! I see! That is even more enlightening," Wind said with a glimmer in his dark eyes. "You were communing with your ancestors. I have also heard that you can read ghosts as well, which is another thing that other Truth Seekers can't do."
"Actually, Quintin can read ghosts," Jennifer replied.
"Ah, I see. Did he connect with some of the castle ghosts early on?" Wind asked with interest.
"Connect with him? They even changed his nappies on occasion, especially Icarus and Janus," Jennifer explained, and Wind chuckled at that. "As he got older, the castle ghosts and the Sorting Hat became his playmates, especially in the earlier years when there weren't many children in the nursery to play with during the weekends we kept him at home. After lunch, Severus would often send him along with Rasputin and the Hat, and he'd go marching down the corridors and playing pretend with the ghosts. He's close to all of them," Jennifer said, her words drifting off as she felt a pang of regret when she recalled how Icarus had so often participated in those games.
"I see. I suppose the paintings weren't his friends because they couldn't march," Wind suggested.
"I suppose. Actually, Severus used the paintings to keep track of what Quintin was up to for safety reasons," Jennifer explained.
"So they were his guards," Wind replied with a nodded. "No wonder he didn't get as attached to them."
"Well, he did use sign language to speak to Rogue and JP on occasion, and Rogue often played his violin to help him sleep," Jennifer said. "But Severus was worried that Quintin would get a little too attached to them as a substitute, especially the year I taught at Whitebridge, and so he made certain he knew the difference. He was afraid there'd be a real emergency and Quintin would turn to the paintings instead of coming to us when he had a problem."
"Ah! So that's the true reason he can't read them! It's fascinating... and rather a shame, too," Wind said, and Jennifer frowned questioningly. "He can't read paintings because his father convinced him that paintings aren't real people. But no one told little Jennifer that paintings weren't real. No one told little Jennifer that ghosts were simply remnants of what a living creature left behind. They are very real, because you saw them as members of your family," he explained. "You can read paintings and ghosts because no one ever told you that you couldn't. It's rather like Focus Casters in that way."
"Focus Casters?" Jennifer repeated.
"Most of us Focus Casters are either first generation or have a parent who has also been labeled a Focus Caster. However, if you ever read some of the children's psychology papers on the subject, you might find them fascinating," Wind said. "It is my belief that the only reason that we don't need a wand is because we were never told that we needed a wand, and therefore, we never restricted our magic subconsciously, forcing us to need one," he explained. "Children's brains are quite elastic, as you well know, and are accepting of any and all realities when they come into the world. It begins to sort itself rather quickly as they adjust to their environment, culture, and language... molding a child to fit its environment and sorting out what doesn't fit. Do you remember Carla Isle, who graduated ahead of you?"
"Oh, the one who used to write all of her letters from right to left and yet it all came out in entirely legible English at the end?" Jennifer recalled.
"She understands the language perfectly, but she wrote differently because her brain worked in a slightly different way. I suppose in a way that's how I got interested in the subject. Remind me to let you borrow a book or two," he said with a smile. He glanced up at the Rogue Painting, who was listening with interest. "Tell me, Jennifer, when you look at the Rogue, talk to him, or even have an argument with him, do you see him as your husband, or does he have his own identity?"
"He's always had his own entity," Jennifer admitted, gazing at the painting, who nodded with a smile. "I didn't really talk to him much at first, but after a while, I actually began coming to him for advice," she admitted with embarrassment. "In those earlier years of our marriage, Severus and I would often have arguments so terrible that we'd go for a long time without speaking to one another, and it nearly always caused by some sort of communication break down or feeling of distrust over something. Well, I really don't do all that well with silence; especially back when my bad self esteem would always have me thinking all sorts of terrible things, so I often consulted the painting to try and get a better idea of what Severus' side of things really was. The Rogue Painting could always give me insight to how Severus was feeling but with a calm head, and the fact that he was often witness to both sides of the argument gave him a way to see the whole break down and what caused it," she explained. "That was even before the year our marriage nearly ended; the Severus portrait came to my rescue as both my adviser and secretary and helped see me through it." The Rogue nodded in agreement.
"And what of my secretary painting? Do you think the Mentor and Student painting are their own entities as well?" Wind inquired. Jennifer glanced up at their portrait and at the two smiling faces, grinning when she saw that the Wind portrait had conjured up some mischief and the Jennifer in the painting had a pair of realistic bunny ears sticking out of her hair.
"I think that's a given," Jennifer chuckled.
"Having a true understanding of that is a very important element in this. It is not a question on whether we are real and they are not. In truth, we are all real," Wind said. "Yes, they were created from us, but that doesn't make them any less real to you, does it?"
"I suppose not," Jennifer acknowledged with a smile.
"So, now I have a question for you," Wind said. "Truth Seeking is a telepathic ability. It is an ability of reading a person's mind through visual stimulation, through eye and face expression. That is the textbook definition of the ability, is it not?"
"With a footnote referring to legilimens, yes," Jennifer said.
"Then how, exactly, are you reading ghosts and paintings when they don't have a physical mind for you to read off of?" Wind challenged her. Jennifer stared at the painting, who simply smiled thinly at her.
"I have no idea," Jennifer said flatly.
"Oh. Perhaps we should take them apart to see if that helps? Or test your blood? Or conduct other Truth Seeker tests? Perhaps it's something in the paint? Or in how the ghosts' remains are stored? Do the remains have to be present when you read them? And what if their faces are distorted? Because I'm very interested in what sort of scientific paper you could write using such methods to explain this anomaly," Wind suggested, completely unsurprised when Jennifer's expression became more and more conflicted. "Do you understand why I think that your are going about your research on the Sorting Hat the wrong way now?"
"Yes," Jennifer admitted. "And yet... even if I do acknowledge the Sorting Hat is a real entity, I can't let this go. Why did the Sorting Hat decide to make a new house all of the sudden? And what is he trying to hide from us?"
"Ah!" Wind said with an approving smile. "Now you're finally asking the right sort of questions."
When Severus came into the bedroom that evening, he found Jennifer already home and settled in bed with her pillows propped up, reading a cotton-bound hardback book without a dust cover.
"I see you are back. Was the trip that exhausting? I was going to offer you some tea before bed, especially with that storm coming in," Severus said.
"Actually, that sounds lovely, I just came in here to be comfortable more than anything," Jennifer explained, getting up and throwing her dressing gown on.
"Did you find out anything interesting? You did say something about wanting to speak with Wind before the meeting," Severus said, opening the door to his sitting room.
"Yes, I borrowed this book from him... he suggested that I should read it," Jennifer replied.
"Oh? Did he give you some indications on what went wrong with your version of the Sorting Hat?" Severus asked, waiting for her to get comfortable on the sofa. He cracked open one of the windows to let some fresh air in and poured them some tea.
"Actually, he told me a lot of things that made me wonder if I should have even attempted it at all," Jennifer admitted, putting down the book and taking the cup. "He made me understand that some things just can't be quantified in the way I was trying to do it."
"Really," Severus said, not even attempting to hide his expression.
"Yes, I know, you already tried to tell me that a dozen times," Jennifer acknowledged with a sigh.
"And yet somehow, Wind says the exact same thing and you listen to him nearly every single time," Severus taunted.
"It's just that he puts things differently than you do, that's all," Jennifer replied.
"Generally, he speaks in vague metaphors," Severus said.
"Well, yes, sometimes, but it's more that he's good at putting me on a path that makes me work things out for myself and in my own way," Jennifer explained. "Anyway, this book really has nothing to do with the Hat. It's about some research he's done in the past about magic in children and how some of their magic abilities develop. This book in particular is focusing on the effects that parenting style can have on what magical abilities a child can develop and when."
"Oh no," Severus said flatly with a blank expression on his face. "Please don't tell me that this book is convincing you that we have been doing parenting 'wrong' all of these years."
"No, not exactly," Jennifer said, and Severus' expression became even more alarmed. "I promise it isn't like that at all, Severus."
"I'm afraid to believe you at this point. Your pendulum may not swing as fast from one side to the other as Quintin's does any more, but I know that there's still a part of you that becomes anxious and uncertain when you are dealing with any topic that makes you question your past decisions," Severus said sternly, "especially when it comes to things like parenting. And yes, we have made our fair share of mistakes just like all parents do when raising children, but considering that we've been in this whole 'raising children' business longer than nearly anyone else, I rather think we have it about down now," Severus concluded.
"Yes dear," Jennifer humored him, and Severus squinted at her sudden use of the word 'dear'. "Actually, this isn't directly related to our parenting skills. It was about my own upbringing."
"Oh, lord, that's even worse," Severus bemoaned. "Perhaps I should have laced the tea this evening."
"Severus, really!" Jennifer said, laughing at his suspicion in spite of herself. "Do give me a moment to explain. It's about certain magical abilities that are stifled because parents tell their children that such abilities are impossible. You know as well as I do that young children tap into Wish Magic better than anyone, and it manifests in an amazing array of abilities that only seem to be limited by a young child's understanding and imagination..."
"And is therefore the most dangerous sort of magic that needs to be curbed as quickly as possible so not to put the child, family, or anyone else in harms way," Severus interrupted firmly.
"Yes, I know, and of course I agree for the most part, especially knowing what you went through as a child," Jennifer said, causing Severus to squint again. "But Wind made me wonder if we weren't curbing those abilities too much. We got to talking about the fact that I could use my Truth Seeking ability to read the minds of paintings and ghosts when such a thing shouldn't be possible. He thinks that part of the reason that I can do it when others can't is because my parents never told me it was impossible."
"Jennifer, do you recall why Peter and Wendy is banished in our household?" Severus asked evenly.
"Because Alex decided that happy thoughts were enough to make her fly even without Pixie Dust and broke her leg jumping off the roof when she was seven," Jennifer replied.
"It also wouldn't have worked with the Pixie Dust. Just because you believe something doesn't make it so, Jennifer."
"I'm not saying that we don't teach children about how things work, Severus, and I'm not saying we shouldn't keep them from conducting unsafe experimentation. I also understand why you want them to keep their feet on the ground."
"Jennifer, that pun was horrendous, even for you," Severus informed her curtly.
"What I am saying is that perhaps we should be more careful, so that we don't limit them needlessly," Jennifer explained, picking up the book again. "One of the sections of this book is dedicated to Focus Casters. It talks about how most Focus Casters are either first generation Wizards or they have at least one parent who is a Focus Caster themselves," Jennifer explained, noticing that Severus became interested again. "One of the educators that participated in the research has a theory that it might be because they were never told that they couldn't. As children born in a magic family, parents are used to labeling all magic that young children cast before they are trained as Wish Magic. They teach their children to suppress it by controlling emotions and their impulses... and for very good reason, no one knows that better than us," Jennifer said before he could argue the point. "The children are told time and again throughout their childhood that they shouldn't use magic until they go to magic school and until they get their wand," she said, shaking her finger as if scolding a disobedient child. "But what if that isn't entirely true? I mean, what if all children aren't inherently Focus Casters?" she asked. "In magic families, the children separate Wish Magic as being different from 'real magic'. They truly start to believe that they can't learn magic without a wand, so they never develop the talent. But children growing up in Muggle families haven't ever been told that. Their parents may have been aware that strange things happened around their children, but their first true awareness of being magic is when they get their letter to Hogwarts or Whitebridge or Greenburrow and so forth, and that is when they're told from the start that they will need a wand to cast magic," Jennifer pointed out.
"And then there's Corey," Severus replied, and Jennifer nodded with a smile. "He experienced magic in an entirely different way. His first experience with magic was watching it happening around him by visiting you at the Broom Closet, and watching the House Elves fill glasses and sweep the doorstep without even seeing them. He read magic primers sitting on your book shelves with the facilities to remember them all, and not having a wand and never told he needed one, he cast those spells straight from the book, knowing that he could cast with his hands before anyone ever had the chance of curbing his instincts or telling him that he 'needed' a wand."
"Then he went to Hogwarts," Jennifer went on. "That was when he was told he needed to use a wand to learn discipline, and again, rightly so. But in the process of coming to school, he learned that none of the other students cast magic the way he did. They used their wands instead," Jennifer said. "Naturally, he assumed that he was the outlier for using his hands, especially when his sister also felt she needed the wand to cast, unsure as she was from the start about magic. So, when his children seemed to be 'normal,' he didn't think twice of it. After all, you know as well as I do that Rose, Ashley, and you yourself were constantly telling those children to curb their Wish Magic and that they needed to wait until they were at Hogwarts and got their wands, and Corey never questioned it."
"I was over there to curb Ambrose's instincts, Jennifer, not theirs," Severus commented.
"Yes, I'm aware, Severus, but nine times out of ten, those children were standing with Ambrose and hearing you say it over and over again. In fact, the three of you said it so often that Ambrose got completely obsessed with getting a wand to the point of driving everyone half batty because of it," Jennifer reminded him.
"Yes, so he did. I was simply attempting to preserve his childhood as long as possible," Severus murmured.
"I know. You had no choice," Jennifer agreed with a smile. "But it didn't do any good, because Ambrose snuck into Hogwarts when he was ready anyway, and do you know what happened?"
"You didn't tell me that he was there and he turned the school upside down with his presence," Severus replied.
"What happened was that our grandchildren stopped hearing the words, 'wait until you get your wand and are in Hogwarts' every single day," Jennifer told him. "So when the baby, Destiny, began imitating her parents by saying the word 'Lumos' when she used Wish Magic to turn on the lights in her room, nobody questioned her ability to do so. Corey, who had been wondering for a very long time if any of his children would be like him, assumed she was going to be a Focus Caster. And in that moment, he gave her his permission to do so. She was never told she didn't need a wand. Instead, she was told that she was going to need a wand to learn casting discipline and for no other reason," Jennifer concluded. "There! What do you think of that? Do you suppose that Wind Elk is right? Do you suppose we're the ones holding them back?"
"I must confess, this isn't the first time I haven't wondered the same thing myself," Severus admitted, Jennifer smiling softly at that. "Toby has told me more than once that the purpose of a wand was to hold a person back rather than enhance their power, in the same way that the complexity of modern magic is there to make one think before using it. It's probably to keep wizards from blowing holes all over the countryside as I seem to when I battle without one." Jennifer nodded at that with a chuckle. "In fact, I wouldn't be entirely surprised if my Aunt Viviane wasn't right, and that the carved wand Toby gave me is nothing more than a silly stick in my hand. If there is any component in it at all, I have no doubt that it is meant to curb my magic rather than aid it, and it's probably just as well."
"Yes, you may be right, Severus. But all the same, I've noticed that you barely use your wand anymore, short of formal sparring matches or spells that require perfect aim," Jennifer pointed out.
"That is true. Everyday spells have become so natural that I don't see any reason to bother," Severus agreed.
"Well, I would like to make a proposal, Severus," Jennifer said with a smile.
"Shall we go into the other room?"
"No, I'm being serious, Severus, hear me out just a few minutes more," Jennifer said with a chuckle. "If we're right and that is what's going on, then I would feel very dishonest passing it on further. Let's not tell this lie to Serendipity, Severus," she requested. "Let's not tell her that things are impossible or it can't be done like we have told all of the others, and let's allow her to make up her own mind about what magic is. We'll teach her how to behave, how to be safe, how to control her emotions, and how to be responsible, of course. But now that we've realized that we may have unintentionally held the others back, let's take advantage of the fact that we have one more chance to correct that mistake."
"You do realize, of course, that if we do this little parenting experiment of yours, the next few years while she's still too young to understand those disciplines are going to be the most hellacious we've ever had as parents," Severus pointed out. But Jennifer smiled warmly, seeing very clearly that he agreed with her. "And we're going to have to warn the daycare volunteers about all of this... who's in charge of the daycare this week?"
"Molly Weasley," Jennifer replied cheerfully. "And the Pythers are our babysitter next weekend!"
"Oh, that's alright then, neither of them will blink an eye at some parental experimentation," Severus replied, glad he was going to have time before dealing with anyone else.
"Molly and Francis are going to be so proud of us!" Jennifer beamed happily.
"Yes, perhaps they will," Severus replied. "But the rest of the family will probably think we've lost our minds."