"Frostmask. Psst. Frostmask."
Frostmask's eyes blinked open blearily, weak, grey light filtering into the den. Autumnleap gazed down at her, his face shadowed in the gloom.
"Huh? What time is it?" Frostmask asked, lifting her chin from her paws and yawning widely.
"A little after sunrise," Autumnleap informed her, his ears twisting back slightly.
"After sunrise?!" Frostmask echoed, her sleepiness immediately chased away as she sprung to her paws. "Snake-dung, Autumnleap! I'm so late with assigning patrols!"
Frostmask made a bee-line for the den's exit, despite the fact that her pelt stuck up in unruly clumps. Frostmask twisted her neck to try to flatten a patch of fur on her shoulder with a few frantic licks as she walked.
Even though it was a bad look to be so disheveled, it seemed even worse to take the time to groom and show up to patrol assignments even later than she already was. Frostmask winced. She could already picture the senior warriors' disapproving glares.
The den was mostly emptied out by now, except for a few cats who were catching up on sleep after staying out late into the night hunting. Frostmask glanced over her shoulder at Autumnleap as she hurried out of the den.
"How long have you been awake?" she hissed in a hushed voice, sweeping a glance over his suspiciously well-groomed pelt. "Why didn't you wake me sooner?"
"Because you were up way past midnight patrolling!" Autumnleap protested, his brow furrowing stubbornly as he trotted behind her. "You've been doing so much lately; you're practically running yourself ragged. You deserved to sleep in a little bit."
"But, I need to assign patrols!" Frostmask growled, her tail sweeping from side to side. "You shouldn't just decide that I need a break, for me!"
"Our clan-mates are grown warriors! Can't they figure out sorting themselves into hunting and border patrols for one morning?" Autumnleap asked, rolling his eyes.
They emerged from the warriors' den to be greeted by a rather crowded camp. Frostmask's pelt burned as many of her clan-mates leveled judgmental gazes at her.
"Evidently not," Frostmask muttered to Autumnleap.
He had the decency to at least look a bit sheepish as Frostmask hurried over to the large crowd. Dustleap glanced at her as she approached, and he scowled, his ears twisting back.
"Letting WindClan get the drop on marking the borders this morning, huh?" he asked, his tail-tip twitching.
From where he sat at Dustleap's side, Dampfang narrowed his eyes at Frostmask.
"They've probably moved the whole border past the tree-line at this rate," Dampfang said with an eager hiss as he joined in.
"This is why Sedgestar shouldn't appoint a cat straight out of the apprentices' den as deputy," Marshnose muttered below his breath from the back, his voice quiet, but just loud enough for Frostmask to hear. "She can't even get up before sunrise."
Dustleap grumbled an agreement.
Frostmask stiffened, squaring her shoulders as anger sparked on her pelt.
I'm young, but not straight out of the apprentice's den! I've already trained an apprentice to a warrior, for StarClan's sake!
She clenched her jaw against the words though. She suspected that if she tried arguing with them, it would only confirm their suspicions of her immaturity.
I need to show them that I'm above their little comments. Then they'll seem like the immature ones.
"Relax," Autumnleap huffed, his neck fur bristling slightly as he came to Frostmask's defense. "We haven't have a skirmish with WindClan in moons."
"Still, Rabbitstar doesn't seem the type to waste an opportunity," Dampfang hissed back.
A growl began to rumble in Autumnleap's throat, but Frostmask silenced him with a flick of her tail against his side.
"Redclaw, will you grab a few cats and take a patrol down the ThunderClan border?" Frostmask asked, forcing her voice to be calm as she ignored Dampfang.
Redclaw nodded, and Frostmask was grateful that she, at least, would not try to question her. Redclaw summoned Weaseltail, Leafbreeze, Snakeeyes, and Cricketpaw to her, the five of them padding off towards the camp's exit.
"Emberflower, can you lead one hunting patrol, and Beeclaw, do you mind taking out another?" Frostmask said, glancing over at them.
She knew that as deputy, she shouldn't have to ask her clan-mates to take out patrols, but it still felt wrong for her to order the older warriors around. Emberflower and Beeclaw nodded, seeming fine with their tasks anyway.
Autumnleap swiped his tongue over Frostmask's ear in a quick goodbye as Beeclaw summoned him to join his patrol with Rowanheart, Hollowpaw and Mosspounce. Frostmask tried to let go of her annoyance with him for not waking her earlier as he padded away.
The number of cats around her was dwindling now as most of the warriors left on their patrols. Finally, Frostmask turned back to Dustleap and Dampfang.
"Dustleap and Dampfang," Frostmask said. "Since you two seem the most concerned about WindClan, why don't you pick some cats to take a patrol down their border? I trust that you'll be able to keep any rabbit-chasers that you come across in line, if they have been sniffing too close to our scent-markers."
Frostmask was quite pleased that her voice came out mild, despite the fact that irritation towards the toms still lingered quite close to the surface beneath her pelt. She also mentally praised herself for coming up with such a diplomatic response to their complaints— this way, hopefully, they didn't feel as if she was belittling their concerns, but she would also get them out of her fur and on a long patrol down the border.
Frostmask felt a prickle of relief as Dustleap nodded to her, acquiescing to the task. But, Dampfang scoffed quietly, making Frostmask stiffen again.
"Actually, I was planning on taking Cedarpaw battle training this morning," Dampfang said, his lip curling up in a slight sneer. "He's taking his warriors assessment soon, so his skills need to be in prime shape."
Frostmask clenched her jaw, biting back a hiss.
Then why didn't you already take him out? What are you still doing here, waiting around for me?!
Frostmask knew the answer to that already: just to get under her skin.
"Alright," Frostmask said tightly. "Get on that then."
Dampfang's muzzle wrinkled up as if Frostmask had just told him to go eat crowfood, but Frostmask turned away from him before he got the chance to respond, quickly striding across camp like she had some place important to be. Really, she was just looking for some sort of quiet, secluded corner where she could finally groom her pelt in peace.
As she reached the opposite side of camp, she glanced over her shoulder to make sure that the warriors were following her requests. Dustleap had joined up with Marshnose and Thornheart, and Dampfang trotted up to the three of them with Cedarpaw trailing behind. The five cats left the camp together, leaving Frostmask frowning slightly.
Is Dampfang going on their patrol then? Or is he just walking with them for now?
Frostmask shook her head to dislodge the thoughts. She didn't particularly care if Dampfang went on the border patrol or went to go train Cedarpaw, as along as he was doing something useful. But, it would be just like him to say that he was doing one thing, but do something else, just to make things more difficult for her.
He's blatantly questioning my authority.
Concern prickled at Frostmask's paws. It wasn't a secret that Dampfang, Dustleap, and Marshnose were three of the strongest dissenters against her appointment to deputy, and they were friends too, who often patrolled together. So far Frostmask had been leaving it to patrol leaders to pick their companions for their groups— that's the way Grovepelt had always done it, and it seemed unfair to not let cats spend their days with their friends and kin. But, maybe by doing that, Frostmask was just letting their dislike towards her grow stronger as they spent everyday muttering to themselves about her incompetence, reenforcing the idea. Would it be better if she split them up and put them in different patrols?
Or would that just make them hate me even more for forcing them apart?
Frostmask shook her ears, closing her eyes and swallowing back a groan. Her head already hurt from thinking about all these stupid internal clan politics, and with the gathering tonight—her first gathering as deputy—she would have to begin thinking about external politics too.
The thought was so exhausting, it made her almost want to just curl up in her nest and go right back to sleep.
"You look a bit lost, friend."
Grovepelt's voice cut through Frostmask's thoughts, and her eyes flickered open. The former deputy was sitting out in front of the elders' den in a patch of sunlight that had fought its way through the overcast sky. He blinked warmly at her as Frostmask glanced at him.
"Is it that obvious?" Frostmask drily responded to Grovepelt.
He purred, sweeping his tail over the patch of dirt by his side.
"Come here. Take a seat," he said.
Frostmask figured that next to Grovepelt was as good a place as any for her to groom her pelt, so she obeyed, trotting over to him and sighing softly as she sat down. She twisted her head, finally beginning the task of flattening her sleep-ruffled fur.
"Tough morning?" Grovepelt asked.
Frostmask sighed heavily again, pausing her grooming.
"No different than every morning for the past half-moon," she said, despair creeping into her voice. "No one listens to me, Grovepelt."
"Hm. Well, I'm not sure about that. Because from my viewpoint over here, I thought I saw everyone leave camp, just like you told them to," he said mildly, his green gaze kind.
Frostmask glanced over at him out of the corner of her eye.
"No one respects me then," she huffed quietly. "Was it like this for you? When you first became deputy? Did they question your every decision? Or, think that someone else could do the job better?"
"ShadowClan cats always have been, and always will be, extremely independent," Grovepelt said, blinking thoughtfully. "It is ShadowClan's nature to question and challenge. Our cats respect power, but that respect is not given with conditions. If it is given blindly, then we are no better than dogs, blindly following the will of a master."
Frostmask's brow furrowed, her tail swishing behind her.
"So you're saying that I need to prove myself worthy of their respect?" she asked slowly. "Show them that Sedgestar made the right choice?"
Tension knotted in Frostmask's muscles.
But, how can I do that when even I'm not convinced of that? I don't even really want to be deputy!
Frostmask closed her eyes for a moment, struggling to retain her composure as a wave of stress flooded over her, the responsibilities of her new position pounding against her back, shoving her under.
Grovepelt must have read the distress in her expression because he softly brushed his tail against her flank.
"He did make the right choice," Grovepelt said, gentle but firm. "You are an extremely competent cat. You're more than up to the task."
Frostmask swallowed hard.
"I think everyone wishes you were still deputy," she rasped quietly.
Grovepelt was silent for a moment.
"Do you know why Sedgestar made me deputy?" he asked. "I was older— more experienced to balance out his nativity as a young leader. I was organized, detail-orientated, happy to focus on the minute details of keeping ShadowClan running while Sedgestar dealt with bigger picture—the politics and battles and alliances."
Frostmask's eyes flickered open again, and she met Grovepelt's gaze.
"I was a practical choice," Grovepelt said. "I was a prop to hold up Sedgestar as he gained his footing as the leader of ShadowClan. And, I was happy with that task. Knowing how much older I am than Sedgestar, I was under no delusions that one day I'd be leader."
Frostmask shook her head.
"You were more than just a practical choice," she insisted. "You're Sedgestar's mentor. He loves you, and he trusts you with his own life, and the lives of every cat in the Clan. That's why you were made deputy. I think he'd have been happy if you'd become leader."
But, he doesn't trust me, and I don't trust him. Frostmask thought glumly. Just another reason why I'm bad at the job.
Grovepelt shook his head.
"I was never meant to be Sedgestar's successor," he said. "Not like how you could be."
Frostmask sighed. Grovepelt's words just added another stone of weight to the pile pressing down on her back.
Successor?! I can't even manage being deputy!
Frostmask dearly hoped that Sedgestar had many, many lives left. What if he died in a tragic accident tomorrow, making her leader?! She hadn't even considered that before! Oh StarClan, what would she do?!
To avoid responding to Grovepelt, Frostmask went back to her task of grooming. Flattening her anxiously prickling pelt with a few swipes of her tongue made her feel a bit better, even if it didn't make the source of her problems go away.
Grovepelt let them sit in her silence. He always seemed to know how to not push too hard. Once Frostmask finished her grooming, she rose back to her paws.
"Give it time," Grovepelt assured her before she could walk off. "You will adjust, and so will everyone else. And, you can always come to me if you're in need of help or advice."
Frostmask dipped her head to him.
"Thank you, Grovepelt," she murmured. "I just wish…"
That things were easier. That cats like Dampfang didn't hate me. That Sedgestar trusted me. That I wasn't made deputy at all.
Grovepelt blinked up at her questioningly, but her words got stuck in her throat.
"…Thank you," was all she managed to mutter again, before she turned and padded away, her head hanging low.
Sunhigh came and went. Dustleap's patrol returned, reporting everything quiet on the WindClan border, and Frostmask set out to organizing the evening patrols, reminding everyone to be back early so they wouldn't miss Sedgestar calling the gathering patrol.
The brightest part of Frostmask's evening assignments came with sending Lizardstrike out on a hunting patrol. So far, the only thing Frostmask truly liked about being deputy was how adorably excited and proud Lizardstrike was for her. He treated everything she tasked him with as if it was a grand quest given to him by Shadowstar herself. He was also partly the reason that Frostmask tried to keep her chin held high as she went about her duties. Admitting that she hated the role felt the same as disappointing him.
Cats went off to their duties with slightly less complaining this time, since Frostmask had been sure to be punctual with these assignments. Frostmask was standing near the thorn tunnel, watching most of her clan-mates filter out of the camp, feeling slightly better about her job, when Pineshade approached her.
Frostmask blinked at her in a friendly greeting.
"Hey, Pineshade, what's up? You need something?" she asked.
Pineshade let out a soft huff of laughter.
"Yeah frog-brain, you. Let's go hunting," she said, her ear flicking with eagerness.
Frostmask froze, her eyes widening as the slight confidence she'd been feeling in herself vanished just as quickly as it came. Pineshade gazed at her, her twitching ears stilling as she read her expression.
"You forgot, didn't you?" Pineshade asked in a low voice.
"Snake-dung! I'm so sorry, Pineshade," Frostmask said, her ears flattening against her head. "When I said that I'd help you with your hunting this afternoon, I totally forgot that the full moon's tonight! I don't have time for a hunt. Sedgestar wants to meet with me soon, so we have time to talk about ShadowClan's plan for the gathering before we leave."
Pineshade shrugged.
"It's fine," she said, her tone even. "You're busy, I get it. We can just go hunting a different day."
Frostmask studied Pineshade's face with an intense gaze, trying to figure out if she was being truthful. But, Pineshade's emotions were hard to decipher, hidden behind a smooth, indifferent mask that was almost as good as Sedgestar's.
"Are you sure?" Frostmask asked. "I feel really bad. Do you want to go to this gathering? If you want, I can ask Sedgestar. I'm sure he'll let you go."
"It's fine," Pineshade insisted again, sounding more irritated by the second. "Like I said, you're the deputy now, so you have more things to do than the rest of us. I'll just hunt by myself today."
Frostmask's belly prickled with guilt at the thought of forcing Pineshade to go alone, when it was clear that she'd been looking forward to this hunt with her.
"You don't have to go by yourself," Frostmask protested, quickly glancing around camp, and her gaze was drawn to a golden pelt. "Oh! I know, Murmurstep is here. I didn't assign her to any patrols this evening, why don't you go hunt with her? Murm—!"
Pineshade smacked her tail over Frostmask's mouth, cutting her off before she could finish calling her over.
"Shh!" Pineshade hissed in a hushed voice, her amber eye suddenly blazing with intensity. "No. Not Murmurstep."
Frostmask ducked away from Pineshade's tail, her brow furrowing.
"What? Why not? Why not Murmurs—"
Frostmask couldn't even finish her name before Pineshade was lunging at her, clamping one of Frostmask's ears in her jaws, and dragging her by it towards the camp's exit.
"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Frostmask protested as Pineshade tugged her through the thorn tunnel and out of camp, only releasing her ear when they were a good couple of tree-lengths away from the thorn barrier.
Frostmask shook her head hard, her ear still stinging slightly from Pineshade's grip.
"What the stars was that!" Frostmask hissed, glaring at Pineshade. "You do realize that I outrank you now, right? I could have you on dirty moss duty for a moon for that!"
Pineshade gave an incredulous snort, taking a seat and smoothing down her whiskers with a few swipes of her paw.
"Oh yeah? Do it then," Pineshade said with a calm blink, clearly seeing the empty threat for what it was.
Frostmask released another exasperated hiss but didn't rise to Pineshade's challenge. She gave her ears one final shake.
"Seriously, are you going to tell me what it is about Murmurstep that's got you acting crazier than a mad dog?" Frostmask demanded. "Did you two have some sort of falling out or something that I don't know about?"
Pineshade shifted her weight, an uneasy slant to her ears.
"No," she said, setting her jaw without elaborating.
"Then why don't you want to go hunting with her?" Frostmask prodded.
Pineshade cleared her throat, her ears starting to flick awkwardly.
"Well… if what you said a while back about her feelings for me are true, I don't want to send the wrong idea by spending a lot of one-on-one time with her," Pineshade explained stiffly.
Frostmask's brow furrowed.
"Okay weirdo…" Frostmask said, earning a sharp glare from Pineshade in response. "You didn't have to drag me out of camp just to tell me that. Do want makes you comfortable, but I think you're being a bit overly cautious. It's pretty clear that Murmurstep knows where you two stand—as in, you're mates with Dampfang and not interested in being romantically involved with her…"
Pineshade's gaze flitted away from her for only a moment, but it was enough to send a sudden bolt of intuition rocketing through Frostmask's body. Frostmask stiffened and gasped quietly, drawing Pineshade's attention back to her. Pineshade's eye immediately narrowed as she took in Frostmask's stunned expression.
"Unless…" Frostmask said, her voice barely above a whisper, "you are interested in being romantically involved with her, and that's why you're avoiding her?"
Pineshade's eye widened as her ears pinned back.
"What?! No, I'm not," she growled, glaring at Frostmask so fiercely, Frostmask was surprised that her pelt didn't spontaneously catch fire.
But, Pineshade's fervent denial just crystallized Frostmask's hunch into certainty.
"Oh StarClan, you are!" Frostmask gasped, her tail curling up in delight. "You do like her!"
"Frostmask, shut up!" Pineshade hissed, baring a hint of her fangs.
"No! We have to talk about this!" Frostmask said, but she retreated a safe few paw-steps away from Pineshade in case she tried to pounce at her again. "Does Dampfang know? Is that why you're avoiding Murmurstep? Is he making you stay away from her?"
"Dampfang doesn't know anything, and it will stay that way," Pineshade hissed, digging her claws into the ground.
"So, there is something to know?!" Frostmask demanded.
Pineshade heaved a dramatic sigh, rolling her eye.
"No!" Pineshade growled, shaking her head as irritation rippled off of her pelt in waves. "StarClan… It's nothing, truly! Just a dumb crush. I haven't done anything. No one knows anything. Besides you now, thanks a lot. I just want to stay away from her until it goes away."
"Well dragging me out of camp by the ear just because you panicked when I said her name, probably wasn't the most subtle move if you wanted to keep it a secret," Frostmask teased with an amused chuff.
"It's better than you shouting it across camp for the whole clan to hear!" Pineshade fired back, snarling.
Frostmask met her eyes, and Pineshade glared at her hard.
"This changes nothing," Pineshade insisted. "And, you will tell no one."
"Of course I won't," Frostmask said, some of her glee fading in the face of Pineshade's continued hostility. "You can trust me, you know that."
Pineshade's tail twitched behind her.
"Okay. It's just that you've made yourself pretty clear in the past about which of those two cats you'd rather see me end up with," Pineshade said in curt, clipped tones.
Frostmask's ears twisted back, a tiny bit of hurt appearing in her chest.
"You think I'd tell Dampfang to try to break you two up? Even when you asked me not to?" Frostmask asked.
Pineshade sighed, her gaze flickering away from Frostmask's upset expression and to the ground.
"Don't look at me like that," she protested softly. "It's no secret that you two hate each other. Why shouldn't I think that you'd try to hurt him, if given the chance?"
Frostmask took a few steps closer to Pineshade, stretching her neck forward to brush her muzzle against her cheek for a moment.
"Because I'd never do it at the expense of hurting you," Frostmask emphasized, blinking solemnly. "I'm not going to lie and say that I'd rather you stay with him, but I won't meddle. Your secret is safe with me."
Pineshade's gaze flickered back over to her, and she sighed softly.
"Alright. Thank you," Pineshade said. "…I do feel a bit better now that I've told someone."
"And, now I can make sure that you don't end up on the same patrols," Frostmask added. "Although, if you don't want Murmurstep to find out, I'm sure she'll notice you avoiding her sooner rather than later."
Pineshade shifted her paws.
"It's not forever," she protested. "Just until this dumb crush goes away."
"Yeah. It's a shame Murmurstep isn't more ugly," Frostmask teased with a quiet purr.
Pineshade rumbled a purr in response, but Frostmask's attention was drawn away from her and up to the sky. The sun was already dipping closer to the tops of the trees.
"I better go," she said, taking a step away from Pineshade and back towards the camp. "I'm supposed to meet with Sedgestar right about now."
Pineshade flicked her tail.
"Well go on then, deputy," she meowed, a light sarcastic edge to her voice as she said the title. "I'm just going to go head off on my hunt now like a good little warrior."
Frostmask's eyes slitted suspiciously.
"You are mad at me for forgetting, right?" she said. "You kept saying that you're fine, but I can tell that you're mad."
Pineshade released a sharp huff.
"Ah, I understand why Sedgestar made you deputy now. It must be for your stellar powers of deduction," she drawled, sending Frostmask a snide, sidewise glance out of the corner of her eye.
A soft growl rumbled in Frostmask's chest at her taunting, but there was no real venom behind it. Honestly, she probably deserved a bit teasing in punishment for forgetting.
"Snake-heart," Frostmask sniffed.
"Frog-brain," Pineshade shot back.
Pineshade turned away, starting to trot off into the forest.
"Oh and by the way," she said, glancing back at Frostmask from over her shoulder. "I accept your bribe. Tell Sedgestar to pick me for the gathering."
Frostmask nodded.
"I will," she said.
Pineshade flicked her tail before bounding off, and Frostmask turned the opposite way, heading back through the thorn tunnel and into a quiet camp. She padded straight for the leader's den, pausing for a moment by the hole in the roots.
"Sedgestar?" she called.
"Enter," came his response, echoing out through the tunnel.
She slipped into the tangle of roots, twining through the short tunnel for a moment before it opened up into the dim, earthen cave where Sedgestar was waiting.
"Hello, Frostmask. Come in," he said, waving her inside the den with a swish of his tail. "We have much to discuss before the gathering."
Frostmask's paws lingered at the threshold of the cave for a moment longer before she crept inside the cavern.
The memory of the last time she was alone with Sedgestar in his den swept over her, and she remembered his unruly fur, his distrustful eyes, and his snarling fangs as he blamed her for SkyClan's attack on their camp.
Then she blinked, and she saw Sedgestar for as he was now; sitting peacefully with his tail wrapped around his paws, his amber eyes friendly and bright.
"How have you been finding your new role?" he asked.
Frostmask hesitated just one heartbeat more before taking a seat.
"It's been okay," she said carefully.
She wondered how to best express the struggles she'd been having with some of her clan-mates without coming across as incapable. Her ears flattened slightly.
Does he know I assigned patrols too late this morning? I could not tell him, but also I wouldn't be surprised if Dampfang, or someone, already tattled to him about it. So, maybe I should just confess?
Sedgestar gazed at her evenly in silence as he waited for her to continue.
"But, I think some cats definitely still don't like that I'm deputy," Frostmask said. "So they can make things, um… a bit difficult."
"Would you like me to speak to anyone in particular?" Sedgestar asked with a calm blink.
The fur on Frostmask's shoulders rose.
StarClan, no! That'll just make things worse. Then they'll say that I'm no better than a kit, needing to run to Sedgestar for everything and hide behind his tail!
"It was partly my fault today," she amended quickly. "I woke up late this morning, so I didn't assign patrols on time."
Sedgestar's head tilted slightly to the side.
"So, you're handling it?" he asked.
"Yes," she meowed with a nod. "I also spoke to Grovepelt today, and he gave me some good advice. I feel much better about it now."
That was only half true, but Sedgestar looked pleased.
"That's very good," he said. "Grovepelt will have much wisdom to offer you in these coming moons as you grow into the role."
Frostmask nodded, and a beat of silence filled the den. Frostmask glanced away for him for a moment, shifting her paws as she tried to muster the courage to ask the question that'd been burning in the back of her mind since the day that he'd named her deputy.
"Sedgestar…" she began again hesitantly. "Can I ask why you chose me as deputy?"
She glanced back up at him in time to see him blink once, his amber eyes thoughtful.
"You've got a good head on your shoulders," he explained simply. "You're insightful. Compassionate, but not naive. You have the ability to lead, but also know when to delegate. These are all good qualities for a deputy."
Frostmask's brow furrowed.
"But, the others are right when they say that I'm young and inexperienced," she said. "And, there are many other cats who fit those categories, both my age and older. Like… Weaseltail. Why didn't you pick him for deputy? Oh, or Emberflower?"
"But, your youth was part of the reason why I chose you," Sedgestar interjected, his brow furrowing slightly. "I may not yet be the age of an elder, but I'm not a young warrior anymore either. If I picked a cat my age, by the time I lost my last life, and they became leader, they'd be quite old. Or, even worse, if I picked a cat my age, they could die shortly before me, leaving an inexperienced deputy in charge when I did die. I don't want to take that risk."
Sedgestar gave a wane purr.
"That's what happened to me, and I'm convinced that the only reason ShadowClan survived the first few seasons of my leadership is because we were blessed to have Grovepelt as my deputy, guiding me. I'm not going to count on any future leaders being as lucky as I was. That's why I need to take a young warrior as deputy now, not later."
"But, couldn't you still die in a tragic accident tomorrow?" Frostmask insisted, flexing her claws with concern. "What would I do then?"
Sedgestar shook his head.
"That's very unlikely. I have several lives left. I will have plenty of time to train you," he said.
Frostmask blinked, her brow furrowing slightly.
"Train me?" she echoed in confusion.
"Yes," Sedgestar meowed with a nod, his serious eyes staring into hers. "Being deputy involves more than just handing out patrol assignments. If you want, you can think of me like your mentor, and this like a second apprenticeship. You may be inexperienced now, but I will teach you all I know. You will learn from me how to be a leader."
Frostmask had to tense her muscles to keep her fur from bristling, anger suddenly simmering deep down in her stomach.
So that's the real reason you chose me? Because I seemed like the easiest out of the younger warriors for you to control? To shape in your own image?
The sting of her anger started to take on a cold edge of resentment.
It wasn't fair! First Sedgestar made her deputy when she didn't want it, turning her into the target of all of the Clan's ire. Before this, she and Dampfang had learned to mostly tolerate each other, at least the majority of the time, but now whenever she saw him, he looked like he was a heartbeat away from tearing her tail off! Even Pineshade was mad at her because she had been too busy with being deputy to hunt with her. And, now Sedgestar said he wanted to make her into leader like him, as if it was something to be happy about? She didn't want to be like him!
But, she couldn't even tell him that she didn't want to be deputy. It should be an honor, and currently, his trust in her loyalty was already whisker-thin at best. After all, what sort of warrior wouldn't want this honor? He would definitely think she was disloyal if she told him the truth.
Frostmask blinked hard, struggling to keep her emotions in check and control her expression. She looked away from Sedgestar, turning her gaze on the ground instead to hide her thoughts. She took a few deep breaths in through her nose.
Calm down. she ordered herself. I'm probably just getting this upset because I didn't get much sleep. Yeah, that must be it. That's just putting me in a bad mood.
Those rational thoughts helped settle her some, but the resentment didn't entirely go away. Instead it just retreated to lurk in the back of her mind, half-submerged, but decidedly still there.
Sedgestar must have noticed the turmoil in her expression, but he misread the cause.
"You've always underestimated yourself," he said. "You are much more capable than you realize."
"Thank you," Frostmask managed to murmur, keeping her gaze on the ground.
"Let's move on to the gathering," Sedgestar said, flicking his ears. "We can decide who's coming on the patrol first then get into the details."
Frostmask brought her eyes back up to his.
"Pineshade would like to go," she said quickly.
Sedgestar's brow furrowed.
"Her wounds are healed enough?" he asked.
Frostmask nodded.
"As much as possible," she said. "And, she hasn't been to a gathering in a while. Neither has Mosspounce for that matter, since they were both still healing last full moon."
"Alright," Sedgestar agreed. "Then I see no reason why they can't attend. Who else?"
Frostmask blinked thoughtfully.
"We should bring Lizardstrike, Featherfall, and Yewstorm. They'll be eager to attend their first gathering as warriors," she said "But, Poolcloud should stay. Dewleaf is getting extremely close to kitting, so I don't think he'd be comfortable not staying close to her. Especially if Elmclaw is at the gathering. I'm not sure about anyone else though. How do you pick normally? Just choose cats who haven't been to a gathering in a while?"
Sedgestar nodded.
"That's part of it. It's good to be fair so no one feels left out," he said. "Okay, so let's take Pineshade, Mosspounce, Lizardstrike, Featherfall, Yewstorm, Snakeeyes, Cricketpaw, Beeclaw, Dampfang and Dustleap."
"And, any elders who want to join can too, right?" Frostmask asked, trying to recall the lessons she'd learned about gatherings back in her apprenticeship.
"Any elders or queens," Sedgestar corrected. "But, I think you're right that Dewleaf is too close to kitting to attend, and I'd suspect that Amberberry will want to stay with her kits. Larkfoot may want to come though."
Sedgestar shifted his position slightly, settling into his mossy nest more.
"So the patrol is all decided," he said. "Now let's get into the interesting stuff."
Frostmask met his bright eyes.
"Politics?" she guessed.
"Yes," Sedgestar meowed, his tail flicking with energy. "I expect this gathering will be a tense one, all things considered. Although our borders have been quite peaceful this past moon."
Sedgestar rumbled a brief purr.
"I never thought I'd be grateful for bordering Rabbitstar, but here we are! Since things have been cordial with WindClan for a while, I don't expect any trouble from him tonight. Although Rabbitstar will likely brag and bluster as he likes to do."
"And, ThunderClan?" Frostmask asked.
"It's possible that they've experienced some trouble from SkyClan or RiverClan in this past moon, since they are so much closer to them," Sedgestar said, his ears twisting back slightly. "But, I'd expect we'd have heard something from their border patrols if anything big had happened."
"Do you think Fennelstar and Willowstar will be planning on retaliating against them soon? And, against us?" Frostmask asked, anxiety contorting in her gut. "That last battle can't be the end of it, right?"
"I doubt SkyClan will give up their claim on that strip of ThunderClan territory that easily," Sedgestar said, his tail swishing thoughtfully. "And, the last battle has been the first in seasons fought on RiverClan soil, and Willowstar is a proud cat. I doubt she will let that go easily as well. So, I'm certain that there is trouble brewing. But, will it be trouble for us? ThunderClan led the offense against RiverClan, and it's ThunderClan land that SkyClan is after."
"ThunderClan are closer physically to them too," Frostmask agreed, but then her brow furrowed as she was struck by a sudden thought.
She hesitated a heartbeat, concern trickling through her.
"Did…" she finally began again, her tail twitching with unease. "…Did you realize all that when planning the last battle? Did you ask Morningstar to have ThunderClan lead the attack on RiverClan, while ShadowClan led the attack against SkyClan, knowing that would mean ThunderClan would become the main target for both RiverClan and SkyClan?"
Sedgestar's amber eyes were unreadable as he blinked once slowly.
"If I had the choice between ShadowClan's wellbeing and ThunderClan's, which one do you think I would pick?" he said by way of answering.
Although Sedgestar's words were indirect, Frostmask understood their meaning. It seemed pretty clear that he had indeed thrown ThunderClan in front of ShadowClan like a living shield, and Morningstar was totally ignorant to it.
"But, RiverClan knows that we tried to go after their herbs," Frostmask said in weak protest, shifted uncomfortably under Sedgestar's intense gaze. "Wouldn't make us more of a target for them?"
"RiverClan knows that they chased a ShadowClan patrol off their territory; they don't know why we were there," Sedgestar corrected, but then he grimaced slightly. "But, things don't always go according to plan. RiverClan should have never known that a ShadowClan cat stepped foot on their territory at all."
Frostmask swallowed. So that confirmed it: Morningstar was being played by Sedgestar. It didn't matter that he was ShadowClan's closest ally, that wasn't enough to give him immunity. Then, did Sedgestar's manipulations really stop there with ThunderClan? Or did it extend further— from allies to friends, to ShadowClan itself? And, if he was able to so causally maneuver his allies into the line of fire, what would Sedgestar be capable of doing to a cat that he deemed his enemy? Frostmask had already gotten a taste of his fury when he believed that she was a traitor to ShadowClan, although at the time, she'd been totally innocent.
But, what would he do to me now? If he knew that I've been meeting with Paledusk?
Frostmask suppressed a shiver.
"Anyway, we will play it by ear, but I suspect that there won't be any declarations of war this moon. Instead, you will likely be the main attraction," Sedgestar continued.
Frostmask blinked, pulling herself out of her thoughts and refocusing on the conversation.
"Me?" she asked.
Sedgestar nodded.
"New deputies and leaders don't happen all the time, so Clans tend to make a bit of a fuss about it," he said with an amused twitch of his whiskers before growing serious again. "Prepare yourself: not everything they'll say about you will be nice."
Frostmask gave a quiet huff of bitter amusement at that.
Well good thing I'm used to it. I think I might be more uncomfortable if they were complimenting me all night!
Sedgestar rose to his paws, arching his back as he took a moment to stretch before he turned to the den's exit.
"Come," he said over his shoulder as he padded into the root tunnel and beckoned her forward with his tail. "It looks like the light is fading. Let's go call the patrol and head out."
Frostmask had to stifle a sigh, but she rose to her paws and dutifully followed her leader away.
Author's Note: Thank you all for reading! I'm in a pretty good place right now with writing, so I'm going to try to stick to a weekly schedule for a bit. So expect the next chapter in a week (as long as nothing comes up.)
Autumnleap: Aww thank you! And, I'm glad you liked their new names! :)
Brian.H.H: Hey, thank you! Yeah, Frostmask doesn't really shy away from taking leadership positions when needed, but when Grovepelt first suggests her possibly being vetted for deputy, her initial reaction isn't particularly positive. I think she's best at being a leader when she's not thinking about it (like in a life-or-death situation when she simply doesn't have the time to think, or, on the complete opposite end of the spectrum, in a low-pressure, casual situation like during training with Lizardpaw) because at other times, she gets too in her own head and her self-doubt nags at her.
But, you are also definitely right that shock from the announcement and lingering guilt from meeting with Paledusk was also contributing to her reaction too. So, that, in addition to her current strained relationship with Sedgestar means that she's not super into the idea of being deputy at the moment. (I think she would have been more open to if she had been made deputy before Sedgestar told her about her being half SkyClan since that just really knocked the wind out of her sails in general.) Also, I think she's just not a particularly ambitious cat, like she's never once daydreamed about being ShadowClan's leader as a kit or apprentice. So that means dealing with the daily annoying little details of being deputy, like the petty comments from some of her clan-mates, is all the more frustrating for her because she doesn't even at least take some pleasure in moving up a rank.
So to sum things up, I think she more sees the position as a chore she must do out of duty and loyalty rather than something she personally wants (at least, for right now. We will have to see if it changes later in!)
Does this all make sense? I don't want her reaction to have seemingly come out of left-field, so if you think that those things I said haven't really been coming through, I might consider adding a bit or tweaking some previous chapters to make it more clear!
Also, ahhhh wow I had never put the mettle/metal connection together before, but I looked it up, and you're totally right that the term "mettle" derives from "metal." Apparently, they used to be just variant spellings of each other, but then "metal" came to reference the material, while "mettle" came to mean the quality of someone's being tough/strong (like metal.) The more you know haha. I think I'm too lazy to go back and change it to something else right now lol, but I think if I'd realized that while writing it, I would've picked a different term.