Series: Snapshots of the Past
Story: Crossroads
Chapter 8
Disclaimer: The characters depicted in this story belong to NBC, WB, Aaron Sorkin, and John Wells. We're just borrowing them for some fun :)
Previously: Jed and Abbey punished Zoey for cheating; Ellie remained angry at her sister for roping her into her cheating scheme and for pushing her when confronted with what she had done, and was also angry at her parents for not showing her enough support; Jed and Abbey met with their attorney, Pat Carr, who informed them that Alex claims he and Abbey had an emotional affair; upon hearing Alex's latest allegation, Jed left the meeting
Summary: Abbey opens up to Jed to convince him that every word out of Alex's mouth is a lie; Ellie and Zoey continue to fight; two members of the family are involved in an accident that changes the Bartlets' lives forever
Jed paced under the shelter of a large oak tree as the rain continued to sprinkle the leaves and grass around him. He loved the sound of rain and getting wet never seemed to faze him. That afternoon, it was almost cathartic. So many conflicting emotions in his heart, it was overwhelming. Guilt. Anger. Jealousy. Fear. How could he leave Abbey alone with Pat to dig through the details of her friendship with Alex? How could he walk out on her like that? If he had to be honest, he was angry at her, not for being unfaithful to him - he never believed that - but for not listening to him when he warned her about Alex's feelings, for allowing the vulnerability that led to the hell they were trapped in now. There was no rational explanation to the jealousy he felt when he heard the accusations of an emotional affair, but there it was, seeped inside him, provoking a rage born from fear. What had she shared with him? What secrets? What bonds? Was this other man really his wife's confidante, he wondered.
He did the only thing he knew how to do when his emotions took over him - he lit a cigarette.
"What the hell was that?"
He turned around to see Abbey. The umbrella over her head cast a shadow on her face, but it didn't mask that incredulous look she gave him. She had every reason to be angry, he acknowledged, but part of him felt she had no right. She was the one who exposed them to this whole mess, after all.
"What?" he responded.
"Are we going to talk about what happened in there?"
"I couldn't stay and listen to you talk about him."
"I wasn't talking about him. I was answering questions that I was asked..."
"Because you couldn't stay away from him."
Abbey allowed for a silent moment to pass. Then, "And there it is."
"What?"
"Your anger. You've been angry about my friendship with him from the start."
"I didn't like it because of his feelings for you, but I accepted it because it was what you wanted," he replied. "You talked to him about our home life, Abbey. About us."
She softened with the realization that it was hurt more than anger he felt. "No, I didn't. Things were said in passing."
"It didn't sound like it."
There was an edge to that statement that required much more than reassurance. Abbey took a breath and began to back away. "I can't do this right now."
"You're going to walk away?"
"You walked away from me in there."
"What did you expect? Some man says you had an emotional affair with him, what did you expect from me?"
"I expected my husband to believe that would never happen." She shrugged, her own heartbreak showing. "Maybe that was too optimistic of me."
"I wish I had the strength to stay. I didn't want to leave you alone in there, but my stomach turned when I heard that. I felt like I was going to vomit. I could picture it in my head."
"Picture what?"
"You...and him. Sharing things...private things."
Abbey shook her head and shuffled her stance uncomfortably. "It didn't happen, Jed."
"What didn't happen?"
"Everything you're thinking right now."
"Okay, fine, then what DID happen?"
"I don't have the energy to stand here and defend myself to you when it's obvious you don't want to hear it. You're lost in this miserable fantasy and I just don't have the emotional capacity to convince you otherwise, not after I spent two hours being interrogated by Pat."
"I'm not interrogating you."
"You want me to share details of my interactions with him. It's a fine line."
"I never asked the questions that Pat asked. I tried to respect your privacy and your friendship with Alex." He thought about how ridiculous that sounded now.
"That's true," she admitted. "You did respect my friendship with him."
"So maybe cutting me some slack wouldn't be out of line."
He had a point, she conceded. "What do you want to know?
"Everything."
"Now? Out here? In the rain?"
"I need to know."
"Both our emotions are running high. I'm afraid whatever I say right now will result in you trying to catch me in a lie."
"I don't want to catch you in a lie. I'd love nothing more than to just move on with our lives without another word about Alex Foster ever again. But we can't because we're entangled in this legal nightmare that won't go away, and I'm sorry, but I can't help it if I still have questions."
"I don't remember every little thing that happened and in what order, Jed. I don't. That's not me being manipulative or playing games."
"I would never think you're being manipulative or playing games."
"I didn't keep a journal of this stuff; I didn't write it down. My memory is choppy. None of my interactions with him made a serious impact on me, so I didn't pay much attention to them. What I can tell you is that I never betrayed you. I was never unfaithful, I never broke my vows, I never told him any secrets we share." She waited a beat for him to reply and when he didn't, she went on, "That has to be good enough because I don't know what else to say."
"It is good enough."
"But?" She raised her brow, confident he wasn't finished.
"But..." He was reluctant to even say it because he knew how she would take it. Then again, if he demanded honesty from her, he had to follow suit. "You went to Chicago with him, Abbey," he said, a strain of defeat and vulnerability in his voice. "You were with him all weekend."
"That's what's bothering you?" She searched his eyes for a morsel of acknowledgment of the absurdity of his implication. "Are you forgetting that our daughter was with me that weekend?"
"I didn't forget."
"You think something could have happened between me and Alex with Ellie right there with us?"
"I'm just saying, he was in love with you and you went away with him."
"Look me in the eye and tell me you think I was unfaithful to you. Tell me you think I did something wrong, that I betrayed you. Tell me you think I was intimate with another man, emotionally or otherwise." Jed looked down, but Abbey continued. "Tell me you think I'm such a bad mother that I would screw another man with our daughter there with me."
He looked up at her. "Abbey..."
It was exactly what Abbey predicted - Jed couldn't do it. She was relieved in that moment to see the remorse all over his face.
"That's what I thought," she said. "You don't believe this. You're lashing out."
"Maybe I am a little," he admitted. "The thought that you're a bad mother has never even crossed my mind. I know how wonderful you are to our girls."
"When we're angry, things come out wrong."
"They do," he agreed.
"And you're definitely angry."
"Yes."
"Okay." Now they were getting somewhere. "You get to be angry and you get to lash out. Maybe I even deserve some of it."
"I'm just..." He trailed off, emotionally exhausted himself.
"What? Talk to me, Jed."
"I'm feeling all these things that I can't explain, even to myself."
"I know. That's why I don't want to go back and forth with you like this. At least not now when you're so upset. I want you to understand it's not because I'm trying to hide something. I'm not going to engage in this kind of dialogue because the only thing I have to hold on to right now is our marriage and our family. When the dust settles and all of this is over, I want both to still be intact."
"They will be."
"Right at this moment, I have doubts," she said, her voice soft. "Listen to me, Jed, you have every right to have questions. I would too if the situation was reversed. You deserve to have answers and I promise that I will answer anything you want me to. Just not in one sitting, not like this when you don't even know what answers you're searching for and I'm too exhausted to think straight. I need a break."
He nodded then, sensing the gulf widen between them and appreciating her effort to halt it. He put out his cigarette. "Let's go home."
Hands stuffed in his pocket, he led the way to their car and opened the passenger's side door for Abbey. She closed the umbrella as she climbed in, then pulled her seat belt across her lap without another word. Jed closed her door for her before he headed for the driver's seat.
It was a quiet day at the farmhouse. The girls were off to school and Jed worked in his study while Abbey cleaned up the kitchen in preparation for their family dinner with Liz and Doug that evening. She thought about canceling. The conflict between Ellie and Zoey was still brewing and now, the argument between her and Jed just added more fuel to what felt like a raging fire. She was emotionally spent from the anxiety of the chaos around her.
She wiped down the counter as she contemplated approaching Jed. Yes, he was angry. But she was angry too. She wanted him to believe her, no questions asked. She didn't want to have to constantly reassure him. But was that really fair? After all, this Alex saga threw him for a loop too and as a doctor, she knew better than anyone that in times of extreme psychological stress, people often regress and in true fight-or-flight fashion, they rely on whatever coping skills they can muster to make it through a crisis. For Jed, his insecurities came shining through and his jealous streak reared its ugly head. He'd realize it eventually, she thought, and that's when she'd reassure him and remind him how much she loved him.
As she wiped her hands on a dish towel, she decided she'd give him another hour or two to cool off. Any discussion between them now was sure to end in another slew of misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Instead, she decided to make her way to the family room and curl up on the sofa with her favorite book in hand, deciding it was better to unwind a bit before the girls got out of school. She'd been there only 10 minutes when she realized she couldn't stand the silence. She made her way to his study, where he usually retreated when he wanted to be alone.
Jed heard footsteps outside the door, then a knock. He looked up in time to see her framed in the doorway, the hallway light casting a glow on her auburn waves. He sat behind his desk, papers in front of him, but he hadn't been working. Like Abbey, he had trouble concentrating with this argument hanging over them. He returned her gaze and their eyes connected for a brief moment before the glimmer of awkwardness quickly vanished, replaced by a mutual stare of remorse and compassion. Twenty years of love and devotion radiated between them, even in the most heated of arguments.
When it was obvious he wasn't going to start, Abbey took the lead. She let herself in and closed the door behind her, then took the seat in front of him. "Twenty years ago, you made love to me for the first time."
He nodded. "I remember."
"You were my first lover, the only man I had ever slept with. You know that, right?"
Of course he did. He'd never forget that night, the way she looked at him, the way she held him, her anticipation in the moments before, and her reaction when he entered her body. It was obvious she'd never done this before. Neither had he. They were clumsy and inexperienced, but it didn't dim the magic of that intimate act or the physical and emotional bond that formed between them.
"Of course I do," he said.
"You're still the only man I've ever slept with, Jed. I have never loved anyone but you. I have never lusted after anyone but you. There have been no other men, no other crushes, no other fantasies."
"Abbey, you don't have to..."
"Yes, I do," she insisted. She waited for him to look into her eyes and she went on, "I have never so much as flirted with another man since I met you. You're the only one I've ever wanted; you're the only one I want now."
"Even after today," he said, more of a statement than a question.
"Even after today," she confirmed. "I'm not an idiot, Jed. I know that in the end, an affair would be a deal-breaker. I know that even if you didn't leave me, I'd lose such a big part of you that it would never be the same. And that isn't even the reason I wouldn't do it. The reason I wouldn't do it is because I am in love with you. Madly, deeply in love. You're the one who turns me on, who makes me feel things that other men can't. I have no desire to be intimate with anyone else. And if in some nightmarish alternate universe, I ever did, I wouldn't act on it. I would be honest with you, but I would never betray you. Whatever my shortcomings as a wife, I have remained true to my vows. I have been and will continue to be faithful and loyal to you."
He gave her another nod of the head and looked at his desk, too ashamed to face her. He said quietly, "You shouldn't have had to tell me that."
"You needed to hear it."
Elizabeth Anne Bartlet had changed her name. She'd dropped her middle name and became Elizabeth Bartlet Westin. She didn't consider the impact of the middle name Anne, the same middle name her mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother all shared. She thought of it as a filler. Elizabeth Anne, much like Abigail Anne, was hardly original, she argued. But once she removed it from her identity, it hit her like the weight of a ton of bricks. It was a family name and its significance to her Barrington roots is what made it a name worth holding onto.
Jed and Abbey weren't pleased when they heard, but they'd learned from the moment she told them she was pregnant that they had very little say over what she did anymore. They barely expressed an opinion when she told them and she assumed they didn't care. Everyone moved on, as they were prone to do these days, rather than wasting energy on discussing a decision that had already been made.
That happened a lot lately, Liz realized. She loved her new life. She didn't regret her decision to marry Doug and keep her baby, but her life was far from perfect and she knew that a large part of her discontent had to do with the trouble it had caused with her parents. Sure, they supported her - they hosted her wedding and put on a happy face for her sake - and if there was any doubt how much they loved her, that fact pretty much put an end to it. But things weren't the same and she wondered if they ever would be again.
As she dressed for dinner before she and Doug left for her parents' house that night, she turned to the side to see her pregnant belly in the mirror. She was 35 weeks along now; it was becoming more real everyday. She couldn't wait to deliver her baby, to meet her and hold her in her arms, to feed her and rock her to sleep. She'd be the best mother ever, she promised, as she remembered that she'd had such strong role models who taught her the nuances of parenting. Jed and Abbey weren't perfect - and Liz was certainly not shy in her criticism of them - but she knew how lucky she was to have them as her mom and dad.
"A few more weeks, baby doll," she whispered, looking down at her stomach as her baby kicked. "Just hold on a few more weeks."
Doug snuck up behind her, his torso against her back and his arms outstretched over her abdomen. "Are we going to tell your folks her name?"
"Not yet."
"How come?"
She turned to look at him. "It'll be such a big deal to them. I want just the right time. I want it to be perfect."
"How do you know it won't be tonight?"
"Just a feeling," she said. "I have a weird feeling about tonight."
"Then let's not go."
"We have to go. It'll crush them if we cancel," she insisted. "But don't say anything about the name until I do, okay?"
"Whatever you want."
Liz looked in the mirror again, smiling from ear to ear as she felt another kick. The baby always kicked when they talked about her; it was like she knew, Liz thought. It happened so often that the few times she didn't kick when they discussed her, Liz worried and poked at her abdomen until she felt her move. Perhaps that was the earliest sign of being an overprotective mom, but she didn't care. As long as her baby was happy and healthy, she'd work on calming her anxiety over time. For now, the only thing that mattered was the anticipation - and fear - of a normal pregnancy ending in a normal labor and delivery.
In five short weeks, Anneliese Abigail Westin would enter the world and change all their lives forever.
Growing up, Jed hated dinner parties, mainly because of all the drama that came before guests descended on the old Bartlet home. Nothing wound his father up into a frenzy more than the stress of insuring the family looked perfect for outsiders. The house had to be immaculate, every nook and cranny tucked neatly into place. Jed remembered that any hint of clutter had the potential to set him off, even something as minor as a single Lego piece sitting undisturbed in the center of the boys' playroom. John's rage made dinner parties so uncomfortable that when Jed knew his mom was planning one, it instantly paralyzed him with anxiety.
Marrying Abbey changed his outlook. The terror was gone and he soon learned how much he enjoyed entertaining. They had a specific routine - Abbey usually chose the menu and Jed and the girls did the shopping. He'd return with all the ingredients, take some flak for succumbing to their daughters' manipulation to buy things not on the grocery list, and he and Abbey would get to work together in the kitchen.
On that April day, their routine failed. Too fatigued by the events of the morning, Abbey retrieved a couple of chicken breasts from the fridge and scoured the pantry for ingredients they already had while Jed kept his distance as he re-evaluated the day. He had remained in his study and sat in his chair with his elbows resting on the desk. Abbey had been so honest with him and her candor just reinforced how silly he'd been to doubt her. He wanted to go after, but something kept him from doing it when she first left. Now, 30 minutes later, he decided he'd waited long enough. He shoved his chair back and made his way to the kitchen, approaching sheepishly with his hands in his pocket as he stopped in the entryway and watched her slicing cucumbers.
"Someone once said that the key to a successful marriage is falling in love with the same person over and over again," he announced. "I don't know who said it, but there it is." He waited until she glanced up at him and then he went on, "So, I'm thinking you and I are in pretty good shape because I'm madly, deeply in love with you too."
Abbey closed her eyes for a moment as she felt her muscles relax for the first time that day. "I'm pretty sure you're the one who said it."
"Nah, I stole it from someone; just can't remember who." He took a step closer to her side of the counter. "How do you put up with me when I'm being a jackass?"
"It's been 20 years. I'm used to it."
The stared at each other and shared a warm smile.
"I wouldn't hold it against you if you slapped me right now," he said. "Might knock some sense into me."
Abbey set down the knife and wiped her hands on a dish towel, then tucked a finger under his chin and leaned in to give him a kiss, her hand on his cheek as she pulled away afterwards. "I love you."
"I love you too," he replied. "What can I do to show you how much I support you?"
"The only thing I need you to do is forgive me for bringing him into our lives. Can you do that?"
"Of course I can."
"Right now?"
A little more hesitation this time. "Yes."
She sensed the hesitation. "Are you sure?"
He returned to the other side of the counter. "It's not about forgiveness, Abbey. I could forgive you for anything."
"You think I slept with him, even after everything I just said?"
"No, I don't. I really don't. I swear. Like I said this morning, I can't explain everything I'm feeling. What I can tell you is that there's this thing inside me. I can't describe it."
"Try. You can tell me anything, Jed. Be as blunt as you need to be. I can take it."
"If you really want to know, I wish you'd listened to me." He saw her expression change as she took in the words. "You dismissed me, my doubts about the friendship. You minimized it as the rantings of a jealous husband. You went to Chicago and I didn't even know he was going too until the last minute and then you thought I was overreacting when I got upset. Remember?"
How could she not? She recalled that day at the airport. She thought she'd told him, that he'd understood this was a business trip and nothing more. But she couldn't forget the look of shock on his face when he realized Alex would be going too. She never meant to hurt him and it was at this very moment that she realized how much she had.
"I do," she said, giving him a look of compassion.
"So I just...I need some time to get over it in this context. Okay?"
"Okay."
"It doesn't mean I don't love you or that I don't support you. And I want to be very clear, no matter what happened between us, no matter what friendship you formed with him, no matter what he THINKS happened in Chicago, you did not deserve what he did to you."
"Thank you for saying that."
"I've said it before."
"I know, but it means more that you said it now."
"Why?"
"Because I need to know you're in my corner, despite what happened today."
"I am always in your corner, Abbey. I always have been and always will be."
"I hope so because I don't know what's going to happen next. I've left myself open to so many rumors and allegations and I fully expect that he will take advantage of that."
"I do too. In fact, I'd guarantee it. He's going after your credibility."
"The thing is, I don't care," she said.
"Of course you do."
"No, I don't. He can say whatever he wants and I'll deal with the professional repercussions. The worst thing he could do to me is turn you against me."
"That is never going to happen."
"You walked out on me today," she reminded him. "When you walked out that door, my heart sank. All I could think about is how well Alex knows me. He knows the way to get to me is to come between us, to make you doubt me and cause a rift that wouldn't be easily repaired. That terrifies me."
"I shouldn't have left like that, you're right, but no one has the power to turn me against you," he assured her, his hands over her upper arms. "Ever."
He wrapped her in his embrace. His hold was strong. Protective. He inhaled the scent of her hair and gently held the back of her head when she buried her face in his shoulder. She was so vulnerable like this and it was only when they were alone that she let him see it. Like a victim of abuse confronting a despicable act of gaslighting, she doubted herself. She questioned her own motives, her own actions. Alex had made her question everything she knew about herself. She even blamed herself, much more than anyone else could have. She didn't verbalize any of it that day, but he saw it written all over her face.
Abbey pulled out of his arms and gave a single wipe to the tear dangling on her lower lash. She cleared her voice and steeled herself against the emotions that threatened to erupt and betray her calm demeanor. It could wait until later, she told herself. In the privacy of their bedroom later that night, she could be vulnerable with Jed and express all the fear and shame she felt, and she trusted that he would allow her to do that and continue to stand by her, as he promised.
Ellie sat by the window of the school bus and watched the drops of rain streak the window as the driver approached the bus stop. She had a light blue umbrella with her that she retrieved from her backpack and zipped her coat in anticipation of the cold April rain. She stepped down the stairs and jumped onto the sidewalk only to see her father waiting for her.
He smiled at her and Ellie reluctantly pulled down her umbrella to get in the car. Seeing her little sister in the back-seat, she opted for the front. Things were still tense between the girls and Ellie had rebuked Zoey's attempts at making up. She felt betrayed and bullied and her anger did a good job of masking her hurt feelings. She didn't speak the entire way home and neither Jed nor Zoey pushed her to.
Walking into the farmhouse, Ellie spotted her mother.
"Hey, how was school?" Abbey asked.
"Fine," Ellie mumbled on her way upstairs without so much as a pause.
It was out of character for her. She'd usually at least ask her mother how she was or share a highlight of her day at school. But it had been a rough academic year and Abbey sadly remembered that a few short months earlier, she also got the silent treatment when she forced Ellie to go to school, oblivious to the bullying her daughter endured at the hands of classmates. She watched now as Ellie disappeared to her room.
"She was like that all the way home," Jed told her.
"She's still mad," Zoey added.
Abbey took her younger daughter's jacket to hang it up to dry. "Zo, why don't you go upstairs and get started on your homework so you can visit with Lizzie later."
"Okay." The seven-year-old grabbed her backpack and started up to her room.
Jed addressed Abbey then. "I set up the meeting with her teacher."
"Friday?"
"Yeah."
"Does Zoey know?"
"I told her. She's pissed of course, but tough."
"I'll block my clinic schedule and join you," Abbey confirmed.
"How's dinner coming along?"
"Chicken is marinating. Can you put it in the oven in 30 minutes? I'm going to shower."
"Sure."
Abbey thanked him, then followed her daughters upstairs as Jed headed in the opposite direction toward the kitchen.
Showered and changed, Abbey sat at her vanity and took a blow dryer to her hair. She had just finished straightening her wavy auburn locks and gave herself a couple of spritz of spray when she heard Zoey scream down the hall. She quickly jumped to her feet to check on her and found Jed also racing up the steps. Husband and wife met in the hall to see Ellie standing at the doorway to her bedroom and Zoey on the ground in front of her.
"What's going on?" Abbey asked, offering her hand to help Zoey up.
"Ellie shoved me!" the little girl accused.
Jed and Abbey looked to Ellie.
"She wouldn't get out of my room so I escorted her out," the older girl explained.
"Aggressively enough to knock her to the ground?" Jed asked angrily.
"I didn't knock her to the ground. She slipped."
Zoey interrupted then, "I wouldn't have slipped if you hadn't shoved me out the door!"
The girls began to bicker until Abbey interrupted. "Enough!"
"Ladies, this is not going to be the dynamic in this house," Jed added in a calmer voice. "You are not to put your hands on each other for any reason. Is that understood? I'm not messing around. The next time this happens, the punishment will be severe."
"Then tell her to leave me alone!" Ellie argued.
"You're older and stronger. If you can't think of better ways to resolve conflict than putting your hands on your sister, come see me and I'll teach you."
"Of course, this again." Ellie rolled her eyes at her father. "I'm always to blame."
"Ellie, go to your room." Abbey stared her in the eye with a look that made it clear she was in trouble. "Don't come out until I come to get you."
The 12-year-old shook her head, furious at her mother and muttering under her breath as she bit her tongue before shouting something she didn't really mean, something she knew would crush Abbey. Elizabeth had done that once. Ellie remembered that day about five years ago. During a heated argument between Lizzie and Abbey over makeup of all things, Lizzie impulsively yelled 'I hate you!' She regretted it and apologized to their mother immediately, but Ellie never forgot the shock and hurt on Abbey's face.
Ellie wasn't like Lizzie though. While her older sister was more impulsive and temperamental, Ellie was usually quiet and reserved. She was sensitive to the feelings of others, even during conflict. Or at least, she used to be. She didn't understand what was happening inside of her now. She was a mess, at war with her emotions and behavior. She felt out of control. She couldn't believe she knocked Zoey down. Had she really shoved her that hard? If anyone else had hurt Zoey, she'd be the first in line to protect her, so she couldn't explain what came over her that made her react that way to the little sister she loved and adored.
Ultimately, she realized, it wasn't the time to figure it out. With Abbey's eyes on her still, she did what she was told. She retreated to her room, closed her door, and jumped on her bed. Wrapped up in the belief that she was misunderstood and alone, she cuddled under the covers as tears rolled down her face and soaked her pillow. Never had she experienced such rage and anger.
She knew she overreacted, knew she was in the wrong, but she was so confused. She was hurt, irritable, and overwhelmed, still reeling from everything that happened, and she couldn't help but remember the last time she felt those exact feelings - at school when she was bullied and physically assaulted. She hated herself for what she just did to Zoey. She was so mad that it was like something came over her and now that it was over, she struggled to compose herself. Her parents didn't understand. Zoey didn't understand. No one seemed to understand. Not even her.
Outside her room, Jed addressed the younger girl. "Zoey, are you hurt?"
"No."
"I don't want you bugging her again," Abbey said. "You know the rules. You're not allowed in her room unless invited."
"I just wanted to talk to her."
"When she's ready to talk, she will. Until then, leave her alone."
Heartbroken and scared that she had permanently damaged her relationship with Ellie, Zoey stared at the floor and nodded. "Okay."
It was 6 p.m. and as Jed and Abbey were back in the kitchen to put the finishing touches on dinner while awaiting Doug and Liz's arrival, Jed sensed there was something bothering his wife, something more than their disagreement earlier. She seemed distracted and frequently looked up from the kitchen counter as if listening for something before returning her attention to the task at hand. She was frazzled and appeared to simply be going through the motions. He watched her accidentally add turmeric to the salad instead of salt, sighing in frustration when she realized her mistake.
He gently took the bottle from her. "It's okay."
"I'm sorry, I don't know why I did that."
He did. "The girls are fine."
"No, they're not. I can't believe Zoey cheated and what she put Ellie through..."
"I know."
"And don't even get me started on Ellie. I don't know what got into her."
"Emotions."
"That's one word for it. I just hope there are no more outbursts. I think we've got all we can handle right now."
She was right about that, Jed acknowledged. He was glad that they now knew what had been going on with Zoey, but the way this whole thing escalated was so unexpected that neither he nor Abbey knew exactly how to deal with it. The girls had never before intentionally gotten physical with each other. The night that Zoey shoved Ellie was bad enough, but to see Ellie shove Zoey was even more jarring, not just because Zoey was smaller and weaker, but because it was so out of character for Ellie to do such a thing. They'd have to sit them both down, of course, and find a way to calm the hostility so they could interact in a healthy, productive way. In the meantime, they hoped for one night of peace and quiet.
"My prediction: they'll be on their best behavior tonight. They'll be so excited to see Lizzie and besides, they know we're serious about keeping their hands off each other. I doubt we'll see this happen again."
"From your lips..." Abbey dressed the salad after picking out the remnants of turmeric before she turned her attention to the rice. "Jed, didn't you add the saffron?"
"I was getting to it." He scanned the pantry and fumbled with the other items in the way. "No saffron."
"What do you mean no saffron?"
"Exactly what I said. I don't see it."
"It has to be there."
"I think we're out."
"How can there not be saffron?"
"I don't know, we must have used it up. It happens."
"Can you run to the market?"
"Seriously? For saffron, something we can easily do without?"
"You know how much Lizzie likes saffron rice."
"She can live without it."
"Jed," Abbey started. "I want everything to be perfect tonight."
"It will be. What are you..." He stopped as he remembered her words from that morning, that she wanted their family to be intact when the Alex mess was over. "Hey." He grabbed her by the hips and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Everything already is perfect. All that crap from earlier and the fight with the girls, none of it matters. Our family's just fine and it always will be."
Abbey gave him a loving smile. "I know."
"Then why are you so anxious?"
"I don't know."
He took a deep breath, then let go. "All right, I'll go the market."
"No, you don't have to."
"You're right, Lizzie does love saffron rice."
"I can go."
"No, it's fine. I'll go. I don't mind."
"Neither do I."
"Abbey, I got it." He started toward the other room to grab a jacket and his keys. "Need anything else?"
"Sugar for the tea."
"Got it."
"Tomato sauce."
"Tomato sauce?"
"I was going to put a little on the chicken."
"What if I wasn't going to the store?"
"I counted on the fact that you would if I asked."
Now he understood. "And saffron gave you the opening?"
"You could say that," Abbey gave a flirty smile as she followed him to the door. "I really can go."
"And I'll never hear the end of it. I'll go."
"We need dessert too."
Jed stopped. "What?"
"Maybe a cake or something."
"They don't need dessert."
"Jed."
He exhaled sharply just as he did anytime he was about to give in to her. "You're lucky you're so damn cute. I'll grab a cheesecake."
"German chocolate is what Lizzie likes."
A sigh in frustration. "I really don't give a damn."
"Also, milk and eggs for tomorrow."
Jed surrendered at that last request. He stopped in his tracks once again and this time, he tossed Abbey his keys. "That's it, you go."
"That was the line? Milk and eggs?"
"That was the line," he confirmed. "It's all yours."
"And you're okay with never hearing the end of it?"
"I'm more than okay."
She grinned at him. "I'll take my own car."
"No, take mine. I need gas." He returned that sly grin. "You're not the only one who's 'cute.' "
"I can think of a few other four-letter words..."
"Hey now, watch that language."
As husband and wife shared a light moment, Abbey opened the door to find Liz and Doug on the porch.
"Are you guys going out?" Liz asked.
"Just your mother. She has errands."
Abbey playfully smacked him in the belly. "Chocolate run, baby doll. Want to keep me company?"
"I can't turn down chocolate!"
"You're going to go?" Doug asked his wife, concerned.
"It'll just be a few minutes. The store's down the street."
"Why don't you both stay and I'll go?" he offered.
"Doug, I'm fine." Liz looked at her mother. "He thinks because I'm so far along, he has to hover over me and keep his eyes on me at all times."
"I just want to make sure you're okay."
"I'm fine," she told him. "Go keep my dad company."
Doug exchanged a glance with Jed as he stepped inside the house. A panicked Jed stepped further onto the porch. Quality time with Doug wasn't exactly the arrangement he had in mind.
"Abbey, wait a second."
"Sorry, can't." Abbey threw him a look from the side and gleefully laughed on her way to the car. "I'm sure you and Doug can entertain yourselves for 20 minutes."
"Abigail, you planned this," he said as he waited for Liz to climb into the passenger's seat.
"What?"
"Leaving me alone with that man."
"That man happens to be our son-in-law. And no, I really didn't plan it. But think of it as an opportunity."
"An opportunity for what?"
"I hear he got a promotion at work and he's probably dying to share the details. Ask him."
Jed pondered this and opted for the lesser of two evils. "I'll go to the store."
"You said you didn't want to go."
"I changed my mind."
Abbey saw Liz brooding in the car, then focused on her husband. "You sure?"
"Positive."
She tossed him the keys and stood by as he opened the driver's side door to slide in. He was barely inside when Liz's voice echoed.
"Dad, why can't you give him a chance?"
Jed jumped back out. "I can't do it."
"What?"
"Listen to our daughter scold me all the way to the store without telling her what a complete and utter loser she married. I just can't do it." He threw the keys back to Abbey. "You go with my blessing."
"And you'll return inside to keep Doug company?"
"We'll see."
"Jed..."
"All right, fine, whatever. Keep him company, set him on fire, I'll decide when I get there."
She chuckled and gave him a kiss. "Back before you know it."
Abbey and Liz had a complicated relationship. Liz was three years old when Abbey started medical school and began a long and laborious journey toward her dream of becoming a surgeon. It was no secret she sometimes missed things - school events, dance competitions, cheerleading practices. Liz was less than understanding about her mother's absence, but as the years went on and Abbey progressed through training, eventually graduating residency and fellowship and earning a more reasonable work/life balance, Liz backed down, remembering that despite missing activities from time to time, Abbey had always been there when it really mattered.
When she was sick as a little girl, Abbey slept in her room. When she needed a First Communion dress, Abbey drove her all over New England to find a dress that made her feel like a princess. When she was on the outs with her best friends in middle school, Abbey planned a slumber party that was sure to make the four girls forget their conflict and get to know each other all over again. When she suffered a broken heart in high school, Abbey stayed up with her, letting her vent and cry on her shoulder. And when she came home from college and revealed that she was pregnant, Abbey showed her love and compassion and worked tirelessly to repair her relationship with Jed.
She'd never forget Abbey's support during that period. She was so scared her parents would abandon her. After she finally admitted the truth about her pregnancy and plans not to return to college, Jed walked out and to Liz, it validated her deepest fears. Too angry to talk and too sad to stay, he could barely look at her. Liz would have been so lost without Abbey, holding her and promising her that somehow, the family would make it through together. It had only been nine months, but that night at the farm seemed like a million years ago. They'd come a long way since then and Liz was proud of that, but as she sat in the car and stared out the window, she remembered how much further there was to go.
"Think Dad will ever be comfortable with Doug?"
"Give him time."
"Doug's been in my life for years. How long does he need?"
"It's complicated, Lizzie." She caught a glance of her daughter. "Where's your seat belt?"
"The store's only 5 minutes away."
"I don't care. Put on your seat belt."
"I care. I'm an adult, I'm pregnant and as big as a house. The seat belt is uncomfortable."
"There are safe and comfortable ways to wear a seat belt when you're pregnant."
Liz sighed. "Not going to happen, Mom."
"Lizzie..." Abbey shook her head. "Why does everything have to be an argument?"
Abbey stepped on the brake as she approached the stop sign at that four-way intersection. She saw that it was clear before she lifted her foot and started to pull forward. That's when she saw the headlights. Bright headlights that pierced the night sky as they barreled through the intersection at a speed twice the posted limit. In those three horrifying seconds that felt like an eternity, Abbey and Liz gasped, frozen in fear. Abbey never before believed the stories that people shared about their lives flashing before their eyes, but that moment changed everything as a kaleidoscope of colorful images ran through her mind - her parents, Jed, Lizzie, Ellie, Zoey.
She heard the screeching of the brakes. Liz screamed. Abbey turned the wheel as far as it would go and floored the gas in a vain effort to escape the crash. She extended her arm across Liz's chest to prevent her from lurching forward and hurting herself or the baby. The thundering roar of the impact sent the Bartlets' car off the road, across the rough terrain and down a small hillside gully in a terrifying path that ended in a collision in the shallow stream below.
And just like that, it was over.
The other car sped away, leaving in its wake, dead silence.
TBC