It is back, and y'all can stop stressing about if I'm continuing this fic.
Thanks for reviewing and patiently ( some) waiting.
I don't own the walking dead.
Please, review
Chapter VIII: Waking up to a tragedy?
Rick has not slept in a couple of days, and he waits for Michonne to wake up. However, she is taking her sweet time. Rick does not know what will claim his sanity first. Between the guilt, the exhaustion, and the anxiety, his mind is losing focus. Rick has not slept in a couple of days, and he waits for Michonne to wake up. However, she is taking her sweet time. Rick does not know what will claim his sanity first. Between the guilt, the exhaustion, and the anxiety, his mind is losing focus.
"Hey," He whispers to Michonne's sleeping form as he abruptly wakes up.
Slight disorientation falls on his brain, and he has slept little in the last days. He pushes the hair away from Michonne's face, and Rick wonders if the fear to lose her will eventually disappear. He slides his fingers between hers, and her warmth reminds him that they avoided the worst.
"Anytime would be fine by me, Chonne," Rick softly says.
Rick has not said the nickname in years, but he finds nothing more appropriate than it does now. Rick clutches Michonne's hand, and her regular breathing sounds fill Rick's ear. Rick demands a form of comfort from her, and he does not know how to cope with anxiety and pain without Michonne. He has never done it before, and he ought to learn.
"This is a bit dramatic," He sighs, and his fingers brush more hair away from Michonne's visage, "You made your point, and I was dumb."
His forefinger carefully explores the small cuts along her skin, and the wounds have begun to heal. In a few days, the signs and marks of her car crash will start to fade. Rick ignores the discomfort in his chest, and he wants to think of Michonne as a priority.
Rick has forgotten the number of conversations, which he has had with a sleeping Michonne. He does not want to continue having those one-sided conversations. Rick releases Michonne's hand, and he rises from the chair, which he has hardly left in two days.
His back hurts, and his five o'clock shadow has begun to become a beard. Aside from the quick showers that he took in the bathroom adjacent of her hospital room, Rick has not spent a second away from Michonne. Sasha's offers to take over for a few minutes have drawn out of him the worst reactions.
"I was talking out of my ass," Rick returns to his seat, and he does not feel like being away from Michonne, "You heard me, Chonne."
Michonne remains unresponsive, and only the rising of her chest stops Rick from having another panic attack. He has to deal with a set of conflicting emotions. Despite everything happening, Rick's anger has not completely dissolved.
" Hey Mimi, I don't know how many times I have to say it," Rick exhales, and the words continue to feel wrong, " This is not a broken arm, and you won't feel better with an extra amount of coconut ice cream." He clasps Michonne's hand to the point that he might break a few fingers.
Everything is an oddity, and Rick does not want to explore their past. He is not afraid of the past from ten years ago, but that happy past when everything was simple terrifies him. Rick looks at Michonne, and he does not remember when he has looked at her without an ounce of anger. Even now, there is anger, but it is a dull feeling. He is angry with her for listening to him.
"You still like coconut ice cream," Rick has exhausted the topics, "of course you still do, and I read it in an article." He confesses.
Rick stares at Michonne, and he wants her to respond to his confession. He would settle for a smile or scorn. Now, he does not care. Two days have started to feel like an eternity.
"I did it once and only once. It was a small kiosk by the company, and you were in cover. Something about fifty things about you, and I knew forty-six. I am sure you lied about the four other things because I still remember everything." Rick sighs, and he is too exhausted to bottle up those emotions.
"I tried hard to forget, and I mean forget everything about you. I wanted all of it gone, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I saw that cover, and it all came back. Those thangs, those feelings, and you came back." The more Rick speaks; the more his accent polished by years away from home returns.
"You were on that cover smiling. I couldn't erase it. I almost remembered the good. It was a random day when I missed you. I do that sometimes. When the anger goes away for a second, I think about you. I think of home, and I can't remember our home without thinking of you." Rick stops talking.
He has never said any of these words to anyone including himself. He believes that Michonne won't remember a word. Telling Michonne how much he hates her is simpler than admitting that he is on the fences. It is a euphemism, and he has never been in between when it came to Michonne. Sometimes, he loves her in a way, which crushes his heart, and the other times, he hates her with the same passion.
"I eventually get angry with you. I get angry about missing you. It pisses me off to know forty-six things about you. After, I feel like shit for everything." He continues his cathartic confession.
Rick stares at Michonne, and he needs her to acknowledge him. He always needs a form of acknowledgement. He admits that he went about it wrong, and the will to correct his wrongdoings might have started to rise.
"It will be easier to forget you and move on with my life. You know to leave everything and start from scratch. I would build a home with a sweet girl, but I can't because I don't know how to forget you. I think of home, and you are in every thought. So I never wanted to go back, but sometimes when I only remember the good, I miss you." Rick explains, and he scraps beyond the surface.
Michonne continues to sleep, and Rick has spent every second awake. He does not think anyone can watch over her as he does, and Grandpa Morgan has enough on his plate with Carlton. Rick's fingers disappear in Michonne's dreadlocks. She still smells like blooming flowers and vanilla under the sterile product on her wounds.
"I lied, I lied, and I'm sorry for lying. I don't want you completely out of my life, but it hurts too much to try. I hurt, and I don't know how to stop it. I don't know how to stop hurting you. It would be easier if…" He stops speaking, and no words are fitting for raw emotions, which he needs to express.
Rick does not want to face judgement in Michonne's eyes. Her eyes haunted him for ten years, and Rick remembers the sheer tear coating them.
"Now, you are my wife. Grandpa was right. I wanted this. I wanted a home with you, and I saw that hope evaporate in your eyes. You saw everything, and I couldn't erase that. Since you are so fond of doing what I ask of you, Mimi, wake up, please." He presses his thumbs to his eyelid, and he stops the tears "I lo…" he never gets to finish his sentence.
A knock at the door interrupts Rick, and he reluctantly leaves Michonne's side to go open it. He carefully pries a way his fingers from Michonne's hand after kissing her knuckles.
"Please, wake up." He whispers like a prayer.
…
…
…
Rick opens the door, and he steps out of the room. Two officers stand in front of him, and Rick crosses his arms. He waits for the information, which they might offer about his wife's accident. During the chaos of that night, Rick didn't care for the circumstances. He only wanted to make sure that Michonne was safe.
"We were hoping to speak to your wife," The officer, who Rick recognised as Davis, says.
"She has not emerged yet, but I have the legal right to know why you need to speak to my wife," Rick asks, and he already thinks about Michonne's best interest.
Rick senses that something is off with the officers. Perhaps, he is paranoid. However, he decides to establish a clear line to avoid any misconceptions.
"Well…" The second officer, Morales, clears his throat, and he carefully thinks about what he has to say, "In the accident, which involved your wife, there was a second vehicle involved. Unfortunately, the passenger of the second car has died, and we are now investigating involuntary manslaughter. We need to interrogate your wife to corroborate the version of the other passenger in her car."
Rick's brows furrow, and there is already too much on his plate. Exhausted, he leans against the door of Michonne's hospital room. How things can escalate so quickly? Rick sighs, and he knows the type of trouble, which Michonne can find herself with this affair. He remembers how drunk she was, and after their conversation, she pushed herself to the edge.
"The other passenger?" Rick asks with slight confusion, and he does not know the specific of Michonne's car accident.
Morales looks at Davis, and the exchange between them is quick. Rick hides his exasperation.
"Philip Blake," Davis supplies for Rick. "Your wife's manager was with her during the accident."
Rick's visage is blank, and he does not show any emotions in relation to his worries.
"Is there any charges against my wife?" He asks with growing anxiety.
"We are here to establish that, but we will rather talk to your wife before anything," Morales replies.
Rick does not like the police officer, and he senses the unsaid. He does not know Philip Blake, but he does not trust the man. From their brief interaction, Rick has his suspicion on the man's character.
"Well, my wife is still in the coma, and when she wakes up, I will prefer a convocation in the presence of my lawyers rather than a visit of courtesy." Rick calmly states.
He has previously dealt with the justice system. With his anger issues, Rick has been in his fair share of conflicts. He knows how cops work, and he does not like what he senses.
"Anything else officers?" Rick asks with exasperation, and he wants to return by Michonne's side.
"No, we will prepare the convocation," Morales says as a form of a threat, which would amuse Rick in any other circumstance.
However, Michonne is in the centre of a potential mess, and Rick's mind is going through endless possibilities of disasters. Rick's protectiveness of Michonne roars and so many buried feelings are resurfacing.
"And I will keep my lawyers informed." Rick smiles, and he returns to the room without any words of courtesy.
…
…
…
I will need you to handle a few things for me. Rick immediately texts Shane.
What did you do this time? Shane answers back, and Rick has not been in any judiciary trouble in years.
Not I and I only need to protect my wife's interests. He sends as an answer, and Rick starts to explain his fear concerning the situation.
The cops came, and Michonne was involved in a car accident with a victim. Their way of talking about manslaughter. I swear they look as if they wanted her to be the guilty party. Rick points out what he didn't like about the two officers demeanour.
Anything else aside from protecting 'your wife' juicy behind. Shane replies.
I will tell you more when we share a drink, but I need you on it. Rick sends his text, and his mind is on what Philip could have said.
He is Michonne's ex or current boyfriend, and Rick can't help his bitter thoughts. His first impression of the man was not the best, but he doubts that Philip would say anything against Michonne. However, the confidence, which these officers showed, increases Rick's suspicion.
Morgan raises his head at the echo of steps, and he already feels the exhaustion claim his mind. Carlton waltzes into the office of his late father's best friend.
His antagonizing glare announces some drama, which Morgan does not care much for now.
"Carlton," Morgan sighs, and he is not in the best disposition for the other arrogant man, "What brings you here?" The question sounds like a disguised manner to ask him to leave.
"What brings me here?" Carlton repeats as he takes in the spacious office.
Richard senior's office is right across, and Carlton feels robbed each time he lays eyes on his father's empty office. Richard Grimes senior was many things, but until now, Carlton never believed his father was a fool.
There are only two reasons why his father would prefer Rick to him. What did his son had done through the years? Carlton knows little of Rick's life, and his professional success sounds like another lie. His father was a fool for letting the Jones steals what he built.
"This is my father's company." Carlton petulantly replies.
"This is your son and I company," He corrects Carlton.
The simple mention of Rick drains the blood from Carlton's face. He can't help the bitterness coating his throat, and his look carries malice.
"How can I forget about your little arrangement?" He sarcastically spits the words, "Your whore of a granddaughter against my dad's share. My dumb son could say no." He continues bitterly, and he has so much to say. "I don't think you care much, but do you know the man that is Rick." He questions and the blue of his eyes hardens.
Morgan shakes his head, and he has no intention to play with his late best friend's son.
"If I wanted to know anything about Richard junior, I would not choose you as a source. You think it is not visible how jealous of your son you are. It used to hurt your father that he did not teach how to be a good father and husband." A deep sight punctuates Morgan's statement. "I think he failed to teach you how to be a good man. If you came to tell me your lies about Richard junior, you find the way in, and so I suppose you know the way out."
Carlton does not respect Morgan's demand. He pulls a chair, and he makes a show of sitting on it. Morgan leans in his chair, and he waits for Carlton to do anything stupid. He expects nothing from Carlton but stupidity.
"Are you scared old man?" Carlton asks as his fingers run on the edge of Morgan's desk. "You should be, and the truth will surface. As soon as we can unearth my father, the autopsy will reveal that you killed him." He accuses with a glee, which leaves Morgan unfazed.
Morgan looks at Carlton, and he wonders how such a man can be Richard senior son. Every second, it becomes obvious why the responsibility to lead the company fell on Rick.
"You will expose the truth. What truths are you going to expose Carlton?" Morgan can't help but laugh at the delusion, "Bless your heart, son, for being a fool. Even when the truth stares at you, you can't recognize it. If you have said it all, get out of my office. Exposing the truth…" Morgan incredulously stares at Carlton.
"It is not over. You and my son are going to pay. "Carlton raises his voice, and he almost reaches for Morgan's collar.
"Until we do, tend to your wounds, son." Morgan deliberately stares at the bruise fading on Carlton's face, "and please I need your bank account number, and so Rick can handle your allowance payment."
Carlton does not respond, and he has nothing to say to it. He furiously walks out of the office.
"This is the worst hangover," Michonne whines, and her words are mere whispers.
Between her throbbing head and her aching flank, Michonne feels like a car run over her body. She coughs for a few seconds, and it is painful. She considers quitting alcohol, but not immediately.
"Mimi," Sasha says with relief, and she rushes to her cousin's side, "You finally woke up."
Michonne is slightly confused, and the disorientation sets in her mind. There is a sheer fog on her mind, and she remembers little of everything. Michonne remembers her argument with Rick, and after it, there is a lot of wine and the dark.
"Rick…" She says aloud, and Michonne almost believes that they are still in the restaurant bathroom.
Sasha catches Michonne's hand, and she presses the intercom to inform the nurse. Michonne looks around the room, and she wants to make sense of the situation. She does not know where she is. Michonne feels a bit light headed, and her memories stop around her argument with Rick. He wanted her out of his life. She swallows hard, and maybe she will need more alcohol.
"Mimi, don't move." Sasha rapidly pushes her back on the bed when she tries to rise from the hospital bed.
Ultimately, Michonne notices Sasha. She scratches her mind to know how she made it to her cousin's house. Since her break up with Philip, Michonne moved to Sasha's home and left the apartment, which she shared with her ex-boyfriend. Philip, she remembers him following her when she went out to call a taxi.
"Hey, Sasha, it's not the best moment for a lecture." Michonne warns, "I had a rough night, and well, I deserve to have vodka for breakfast." She finishes with apathy.
The nurse enters the room before Sasha can reply. She walks up to Michonne, and she carefully begins to take Michonne's vital signs.
"What is going on right now?" Michonne asks, and nothing makes sense.
"Can you tell me where you are, Mrs Grimes?" The nurse asks as she continues her assessment of Michonne.
Michonne looks around her, and she can't tell the location. The room is spacious. There are several sofas and a couch. She would say a hotel room if on her arm there was not an IV, and there is a nurse. Did the day finally come where she drunk beyond measure? She was so furious last night, and Michonne needed those drinks.
"A hospital, I think." She hesitates, but she glances at the nurse to make her point.
The nurse scratches something on a paper. Michonne blinks a bit, and she is trying to understand what she is doing in a hospital.
"Do you know today's date, Mrs Grimes?" The nurse adds.
Michonne glances at Sasha for a little help. She begins quietly to panic.
"Mrs Grimes?" She asks in confusion, and she wonders how it came out that her husband is Richard Grimes junior. "I don't know." Michonne answers the nurse's question, "What is going on now?" The panic resonates in Michonne's voice.
"That is okay, Mrs Grimes." The nurse reassures her, "You were in a car accident, and the paramedic brought you to our hospital unconscious. You are recovering from a car accident at New York Presbyterian."
Michonne looks at Sasha for confirmation, and she feels enough pain to trust the nurse. Michonne cries in pain when she tries to sit up, and breathing is hard.
"I was with Rick…" Michonne attempts to make sense of her last memories, "My husband."
She remembers that night. Michonne wanted to go after Rick. He left the restaurant, and she followed him. She was too drunk, and she cannot remember if she caught up with him.
"Mr Grimes is with your doctor outside." The nurse replies.
Michonne remains a bit disoriented, and she is panicking.
"My husband," she repeats almost in tears.
"Michonne, Rick…" Sasha fails to finish her statement.
Michonne is too disoriented to make sense of anything. She panics, and she wants to know if Rick was into the same accident.
"Where is Rick?" Michonne asks between quiet sobs, "Where is my husband?" She wants to sit up again, and she fails, "Is Rick okay?" She asks Sasha.
"He is outside with the doctor. He is right by the door." Sasha replies, but Michonne hardly hears her.
Her mind is too foggy to process any information. There is drowsiness to her eyes, and her head spins. She feels nauseous.
"I need to make sure that Rick is okay and I…" Michonne's speech is slurred, and she can't think straight.
Everything adds to her sentiment of panic. Sasha looks at the nurse with concern.
"Can you get Mr Grimes?" The nurse asks Sasha. "I will stay with Mrs Grimes until you come back."
Sasha squeezes Michonne's hand. She looks at her baby cousin with concern while Michonne slowly calms down with the promise to see Rick.
"I will be quick, and don't panic." Sasha assures Michonne, "I am going to get Rick."
"Okay…" Michonne says after a deep soothing breath, and she only needs to make sure that he is okay.
…
…
…
Rick tenses and every word feels like a hammer crushing his heart. Slowly, he takes on the new, and Michonne's attending doctor continues to explain what the medical result means.
"Pregnant?" Rick asks with uncertainty while he attempts to respond to the doctor previous question.
Were your wife and you aware that she was pregnant?
Rick strives to understand the statement. He thinks about the night when he crossed that line. They didn't use protection, and well, he did not think much of it. It has been two weeks and a few days. Chances are minimal that she could be pregnant of him.
"She might have been before the accident. When we did her blood test at her arrival, we found an increase of beta hCG. She would have been roughly around a week or two, but…" Michonne's physician explains to Rick.
Rick does not know how to react, and the news of Michonne's potential pregnancy prevents him from notice the constant use of the past. She was pregnant.
"The levels of hormones have drastically dropped down in our latest blood test." The doctor tells Rick, "It might be an anomaly or your wife miscarried, Mr Grimes." He finishes.
The use of the past finally sinks in Rick's mind, and he cannot react beyond a nod. He does not know how to do anything but hurt her. That thought causes a sharp ache. Knowing Michonne, she won't be able to handle the news.
"We were not aware that we were expecting, and it is surely an anomaly. We were not expecting, and we couldn't have been without any intercourse." Rick says in low whispers, and he hopes the conversation stays between the doctor and him.
"Rick?" Sasha's voice interrupts him before he says more to Michonne's physician. "Michonne is awake, and she needs you."
Rick feels Sasha's concerned look on him while they return to the room. He stops, and he turns to face her.
"You heard everything," Rick says matter of factly.
Sasha sighs, and she is glad Rick spoke before she did. Sasha did not want to eavesdrop in such a conversation, and it was an accident. She did not hear everything, but she knows what of importance.
"Was it yours?" Sasha asks, and it is crucial to know how crushing the new would be to Michonne.
"Yeah," Rick's voice does not exclude doubt, "except if she fucked him in the last two weeks, and you know she was with him when this accident happened." Rick needs to express his anger.
"She wanted to fire him, and Michonne and Philip have not been together for at least three weeks. She finally broke up with him. It was yours then." Sasha replies, and Rick does not know what to do with her words.
"Don't tell her anything," Sasha grabs Rick's arm, and she looks into his eyes, "You can't tell her. She will never forgive herself for losing your baby." She emphasizes.
Sasha heard enough of Michonne's childhood fantasy to know that her cousin wouldn't recover from it. Philip's baby, Michonne would hurt, but she would eventually fight to recover. However, Rick's child, she would forever blame herself.
When it involves Rick, it can undo Michonne. In ten years, she never recovered from his departure from home. Sasha does not think Michonne ever dated any man without a thought of what would have been with Rick.
Rick does not reply at first, and he does not know if he can forgive himself. He looks at Sasha, and he had no intention to breathe a word to Michonne. For what reason would he lie to the doctor and implied a lack of sex between Michonne and him? No one is going to tell her anything.
"Good, we are on the same line," Rick says as he pries Sasha's hand from his forearm. "If you don't mind, she is waiting for me."
Rick opens the door, and he softens at the sight of Michonne. He pushes away any thoughts, Rick does not say much, and he walks up to Michonne. He cages her face, and he kisses her with as much passion as he can muster at the moment.
Rick's kiss is ravaging and bruising. Michonne's lungs burn with every breath he steals from her lips. Eventually, he has to stop when she whines in pain, and her broken ribs do not allow any lung expansion.
"Don't you ever pull anything like that again," Rick groans, and he is genuinely frustrated.
Michonne looks at Rick, and she does not know how to react to him. Her last memory is their argument and his confession. Now that she has seen him and made sure that he is alive, Michonne does not how to react. She feels angry and relieved.
"Hey," She hesitantly tells Rick, and he carefully takes a seat by her side, "everywhere hurts, and so can you wait before you shout at me," Michonne asks with slurred words. "I want to sleep too," she moves to the side to make space for Rick, "and don't leave in the morning, please." She adds with long seconds of pause between words.
Rick looks at the nurse, and she reassures with a smile.
"The analgesics are kicking in, and she will rest for a few more hours." The nurse tells Rick, "Call if you need anything." She leaves the room.
Rick looks between Michonne and Sasha. He draws a deep breath, and Rick does not know how to feel. Michonne's words have reopened the wound. Why is it so hard not to hurt her? He does it even when he strives to do the opposite.
"If anyone ever knows about the miscarriage, I will make your life hell." Rick ultimately speaks to Sasha, "I swear if she finds out, I will make you regret it."
"I won't say anything, and she does not need to know." Sasha reiterates.
"I have hurt her enough, and I need to stop before I lose her forever. If she knows, I…" Rick lets his sentence hangs, "We need a chance to get it right."
A.N: the minute science because it wouldn't allow the story to flow if I gave you a breve lab diagnosis class.
1. beta hCG is a hormonal marker which increase in three case pregnancy, trophoblastic disease , or cancer. that is why you pee on the pregnancy test to check this hormone.
2. beta hcg rises during pregnancy to a certain level, and it drops when there is miscarriage. This is why the doctor thinks that michonne might have miscarried, and this is why Rick says that they didn't have sex. Rick is good at science and sexually active.
3. no pregnancy without sex, and so the doctor thinks it is an anomaly or a false positive. that is why Rick lied.
4. you don't have to inform patient of false positive unless you want to redo a test or worry about it. In michonne case, there is nothing to worry about because Rick lied.
5. Rick already had no intention to let Michonne know about the miscarriage . why ?