The second Friday afternoon of the new term had arrived, and Harry was on his way from Gryffindor Tower to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. In his third year, it became a tradition to have Friday afternoon tea with Lyall, his grandfather, and now that he was in his fourth year, he found himself missing those Friday afternoon sessions with family.
Lyall was dead now - a Death Eater killed him a few months ago - but Professor Sirius Black had taken his place as the new Defense teacher, and this meant Harry still had family at the castle. He felt almost childish in his desire to seek someone out - someone like a parent, he supposed - but he'd been struggling for weeks with his thoughts and he longed for someone to talk to.
Sirius was just stepping out of his quarters when Harry accosted him in the corridor.
"Where are you going?" asked Harry.
Simultaneously, Sirius asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to come see you."
"Why? Is something wrong?" Sirius held Harry by the shoulders and darted his eyes over Harry's frame.
"No…err…I just wanted to talk? I used to see Lyall every Friday. I can go, if–"
"Nonsense. You're my godson and you come first."
Sirius tapped on his door in a rhythm and it opened up to reveal his quarters.
Unlike Lyall, who had kept his quarters looking more like a cozy library, Sirius had crimson-and-gold hangings in his quarters, making it look like a miniature version of Gryffindor's common room. Harry felt as home there as he had when Lyall occupied the space, and he threw himself into a squashy red armchair across from the roaring fireplace.
"What's on your mind, Harry?" asked Sirius, once he'd settled into a matching armchair across from Harry.
"It's about Dudley," Harry blurted, surprising himself with his honesty. "I feel…something."
Sirius waved his wand at something behind Harry. A teapot, two empty cups, and a tin of biscuits zoomed across the room but landed gently on a table between them.
"Anger?" Sirius suggested, arching a brow at Harry as he filled the teapot with water and charmed it to boil.
"No…it's going to sound stupid."
"Unless you're concerned Dudley is a secret Death Eater, I doubt what you have to say is stupid." With the water boiling, Sirius placed a teabag in each of the cups and poured the water over them.
"I feel guilty," Harry admitted quietly. "It's my fault…it's my fault he's stuck with us…and that Marge got murdered."
"Ah." Sirius put a teaspoon of sugar into his tea, swirled his spoon around, and took a slow sip. "Being related to you does have its…challenges, but it's not your fault there's a Dark wizard after your life. As for Marge…"
"I feel bad because I hated her but she didn't deserve to die."
"Are you afraid that's going to happen to Dudley?" asked Sirius, pushing a small plate of biscuits towards Harry.
"Yes…and remember what you said when you talked about your brother Regulus? You wish you could've…reconciled with him?"
Harry recalled that the night Remus had snapped at him for being petty towards Dudley, Sirius had come into his room to talk to him about his brother Regulus. Knowing now that Regulus had contributed a little to Voldemort's future downfall, Sirius expressed his regret that they were never reconciled in life, and wished things had been different in his family.
Harry hadn't cared much about that until Sirius mentioned that Lily also had a falling out with her sister, Petunia, over magic. He'd said that Lily always wanted a chance to have a better relationship with her sister, but it never happened. Sirius urged Harry not to repeat the mistakes of the past, and while the advice seemed to make sense, he had no idea how to put it into practice.
Truthfully, Harry had no clue how to move from open dislike to begrudging acceptance of an estranged family member, and the only person he realized who might know was his godfather, who had been gaping at Harry for several seconds after being asked about Regulus.
"Yes," Sirius said, after a few moments. "Is that what you want to do with Dudley? Reconcile?"
"Maybe? I don't know. I thought since…well, you and Malfoy are family…do you know how to reconcile with a cousin you don't like?"
"Narcissa Malfoy is very different than Dudley Dursley."
"But you don't like her, right?"
Sirius sighed heavily and put his teacup down. "No, I don't, but it's more complicated with her."
"Then what am I supposed to do?" Harry asked, deflating in his seat. "I already know he's jealous of me and I know what that's like. I don't want him to die but I can't just be nice to him, can I?"
Sirius had a curious gleam in his steely grey eyes. "Have you talked to Moony about this?"
"No," Harry said, scowling. "He's too busy."
Sirius lifted an eyebrow at Harry disapprovingly. "Too busy?"
"He's married now."
"Married doesn't mean he's busy, Harry." Sirius kept his gaze steady on Harry. "Is it Tonks? Are you upset with her?"
"No. I like her, and I'm happy she adopted me, but they have their own family now. One day they'll have their own kid and they won't want me around anymore."
"Oh, Harry, no - that's not true at all," Sirius said, reaching a hand out to pat Harry's shoulder. "That couldn't be further from the truth. You know they both love you."
"For now," Harry muttered. "But when they have their own kid I won't matter and you're going to die soon, so–"
"Not this again," Sirius groaned. "The last few years have been especially deadly for the Defense professors, but that doesn't mean I'll die."
"Say you do. Who will be left? Andromeda and Ted won't care - they'll have their own grandkid."
"Harry, really, what's gotten into you?" Sirius said gently. "No one's going to forget about you."
Harry looked away from Sirius and into the crackling fire.
"I wish things would stop changing," Harry said slowly. "I used to think I'd never have to see Dudley again but now he's legally my brother – Remus and Tonks's kid. I'm stuck with him and we both hate it. I'm guilty because it's my fault we're stuck like this and I've been an arse to him and Remus, even though I know he's trying his best and doesn't deserve it when I'm angry. And—"
"Slow down, Harry," Sirius interrupted, putting his hand up to stop him. "You're asking too much of yourself. You're allowed to feel however you want, but you're not responsible for solving all these problems."
"But Sirius, I—"
"None of us expected this would be easy or fun. It's all right to feel guilty, angry, and confused. Remus, Tonks, and I don't think any differently of you because of how you've been. We know it's been a mess."
"But what if all of you die because of me, too?" Harry said carefully. "What if it's better if you all leave me?"
"Where did you get that idea?" Sirius asked sharply. "Did anyone tell you we'd be better off without you?"
Harry fell silent. No one had given him any ideas; both Lyall Lupin and Marge Dursley had died because they were connected with him. One he'd loved fiercely; the other he'd loathed. It didn't matter how he felt about them, as both had been killed by the same people.
Harry wondered if it was better for others to abandon him – or have their own families – and spare him from seeing them die.
"I don't know where you got that idea, but we're all better off having you in our lives, do you hear me?" Sirius said, shifting in his seat so his whole body faced Harry's. "None of us are going to leave you. I know things are changing; that's what happens with everyone when you grow up. I know you've got a lot on your mind, but it's not your job to fix everything or feel a certain way. We – and I think I can speak for Remus and Tonks when I say this – want you to be justHarry."
"But being me means all of you are going to die."
"All of this is bigger than you. Voldemort does want you – I'm not going to lie to you and tell you he doesn't. But it's more than just you. After you, he'll be going after everyone he doesn't like. I'm on that list as much as Remus and Tonks are. You're not in this alone and you'll never be in this alone."
Harry stared into the fire again; he didn't care if he was alone. He knew what it was like to be lonely and unloved. Now that he knew what it was like to love and lose others – like Lyall – it was harder for him to accept that others would be putting their lives at risk for him, too, including his horrible, but defenseless cousin Dudley.
"Listen, Harry," Sirius said softly. "I know it's hard, but we all know the risks of being who we are and what we're doing. I think it'll do you some good to be back at school and away from all the stuff at home. When you come back for the holidays – won't be until Easter, if you plan on going to the Yule Ball—"
"The what?"
"I thought they told you about it when they announced the Triwizard Tournament at the Welcome Feast last week?"
"No…is that why I had to get dress robes?"
"Yes, and you can take a date. I'll be asking Professor McGonagall," Sirius said, winking, as Harry stuck his tongue out in disgust. Sirius barked in laughter in response.
"This is what we want for you, Harry. We want you to be here, study, watch the events of the Triwizard Tournament, take a date to the ball, and be as normal as you can. We'll find a way for you and Dudley to work on your relationship, and when you see Remus you can talk to him too, or you can write him."
"Can I come to see you?" Harry didn't want to sound too desperate, and no matter what anyone told him, he felt Sirius's days were numbered. He didn't want to miss out on any time with his godfather before he was taken away from him.
Sirius beamed brightly and nodded. "Of course – Friday afternoon tea?"
"Can I bring my friends sometimes too?"
"Including your girlfriend, Miss Weasley?" Sirius asked wryly, lifting his brow at Harry, who felt himself grow hot.
"Is she really your girlfriend, or was that another attempt at outdoing Dudley?"
Harry shoved a biscuit into his mouth to keep from answering, as there was no way he'd consider answering his godfather.
"Well. Let me know when Remus and I should be talking to Arthur," Sirius said airily, as Harry's jaw fell open and small crumbs of biscuit escaped from his lips. "To discuss a dowry, of course."
Harry nearly choked on his biscuit.
"W-what?"
"Tonks was right – this is fun! When you're ready to tell us the truth, we'll stop teasing you."
Harry's mouth was still open. The truth was that it was a made-up relationship, but he didn't want it to be. He hadn't told a soul, and he wasn't ready to admit it in case it ruined his chances with Ginny.
"So, what'll it be?"
"I should go," Harry said, quickly gathering his things. "Thanks for the tea and biscuits, Sirius."
"That's Professor Black to you." Sirius's eyes glittered merrily. Harry grunted an assent and decided that next week, he'd bring Ron and Hermione, if only to spare himself from being the only one teased about relationships.
…
Harry's fourth year was proving to be thoroughly anticlimactic. By the end of October, when the Beauxbatons and Durmstrang students were set to arrive for the selection of the Triwizard champions, Harry was looking forward to something to break the monotony of the everyday. The most exciting thing that had happened since the beginning of the term had been a shouting match between Professors Snape and Black that only Harry overheard. It was the most unhinged Harry had ever seen either of them, and if it hadn't been for Mr. Filch's interruption, Harry was sure Snape and Sirius would've killed each other.
Since then, no further fights had come to pass between Snape and Sirius, and instead Harry entertained himself with his friends and studies.
Quidditch was cancelled due to the Triwizard Tournament; the pitch was being used for something else, so Harry had resorted to flying over the Forbidden Forest with Ron and Ginny when he felt the itch to be up in the air. It wasn't anywhere near as fun as playing Quidditch, but it was enough to give him much-needed time on his broomstick.
Classes were challenging. Most of Harry's professors were already lecturing about the O.W.L.s to come in their fifth year, and they thought preparation beginning in the fourth year was best. Unsurprisingly, Hermione was already panicking about her performance. Surprisingly, Ron decided to join Hermione in most of her evening study sessions, which left Harry to either join them or go flying with Ginny.
Harry and Ron's marks had never been better, even in Potions and History of Magic, their worst subjects. Though he realized his first three years at Hogwarts had been unusual, Harry longed for something to shake up the daily routine and give him something else to do.
Even Malfoy was unusually subdued in their fourth year. Harry wondered if Sirius had spoken to his cousin Narcissa at all, or if Sirius's teaching had made much of an impact, because Malfoy never had anything to say during Defense Against the Dark Arts lessons.
Thus, by Halloween, Harry was eager to see new faces around the castle and watch the Triwizard events with a mixture of both interest and envy. He did like to imagine himself holding the Triwizard Cup triumphantly, perhaps with Ginny at his side, but he was too young. Sirius liked to remind him frequently that it was good to have a 'dull' year, but Harry disagreed.
All of this changed, however, the night of Halloween.
The Great Hall was richly decorated for the Halloween feast; Beauxbatons and Durmstrang students were mingling well with Hogwarts students. The food was delicious as usual, and even Hermione didn't mind losing a night of studies to see the great unveiling of the Triwizard champions.
Dumbledore revealed the names of the champions one by one; the first was Viktor Krum, famous Bulgarian Seeker to represent Durmstrang. Second came Fleur Delacour, a part-Veela witch from Beauxbatons. Lastly, Cedric Diggory, a sixth year Hufflepuff, was chosen as Hogwarts's champion. Though Harry was initially bothered that Angelina Johnson, one of his Gryffindor Quidditch mates, wasn't chosen, he thought Cedric was a fine choice.
It was a few minutes after Cedric had been chosen that Harry's name emerged from the Goblet of Fire.
Harry felt the hundreds of pairs of eyes watching him as he walked towards where the other champions were gathered. To his relief, Sirius was waiting for him.
"I'll help you," Sirius hissed into his ear, as they walked together into a chamber off the side of the Entrance Hall. "There's no way they can make you compete."
As soon as they were inside the chamber, the others descended upon him.
"What eez 'ze meaning of zis?" Madame Maxime demanded, her very tall frame towering over Harry.
Igor Karkaroff, of Durmstrang, accused Dumbledore of cheating, while Sirius yelled, insisting Harry would not participate without a guardian's approval.
Harry, stammering and confused, shrank back against the others, until Barty Crouch Sr. came stomping into the chamber with Dumbledore and Ludo Bagman at his heels.
"SILENCE!" Crouch Sr. shouted. "Ask the boy—"
"Harry, did you put your name in the Goblet of Fire?" Dumbledore asked calmly, pushing the others aside.
"No, I didn't," Harry said, feeling helpless.
"HE LIES!" Karkaroff roared, sending spittle into Harry's face.
"No – I didn't – I didn't!" Harry said, panicked. "I'll take Veritaserum! I'm not lying!"
"Harry, you don't need to do that – you're not competing. I'm your godfather and I'm not allowing it." Sirius turned to Crouch Sr. as a dark shadow passed over his face.
"You are not making my godson compete in this dangerous, potentially fatal tournament," Sirius said, in a whisper that made Harry's hair stand on edge again.
"I…the rules are binding," Crouch Sr. said reluctantly. "My hands are tied. There's nothing we can do."
"'Ow do we know 'ze godfather eez not lying?" Maxime demanded, rounding on Sirius. "'E pretends to—"
"That's enough!" Dumbledore said harshly. "I shall ask Professor Snape for Veritaserum. In the meantime, I will ask Professor McGonagall to contact Mr. Potter's other two guardians, Mr. Lupin and Mrs. Lupin-Tonks. They should be informed."
Dumbledore swept out of the room with his periwinkle robes billowing behind him.
Harry didn't know where to look. A large-jawed, bespectacled woman began taking pictures of him and Sirius growled at her to leave Harry be. Harry was growing worried that something was wrong with Sirius, as the last time he'd been this infuriated, it had been with Snape.
Dumbledore returned with Snape, who held two vials of clear liquid in his hands.
"I believe it is against school policy to administer Veritaserum to a student," Snape said silkily, eyeing Sirius with hate-filled, glittering black eyes.
"I volunteered, sir," Harry said, feeling small. "I didn't put my name in."
Harry took the dose of Veritaserum first and passed easily. He had not put his name in the goblet; he hadn't asked anyone else to put his name in it. He hadn't even approached the goblet, except to see Fred and George Weasley have a fight in front of it.
Sirius came next. He also passed, but in his truthful state, he revealed he thought that either Snape or Karkaroff were behind the stunt, as they'd been former Death Eaters. This led to a violent, bloody fistfight in which Sirius broke his nose, Snape broke his hand, and Karkaroff was thrown against a wall. They were all removed from the chamber, but not before it had all been recorded.
The woman taking pictures – whose name was revealed to be Rita Skeeter – nearly blinded Harry with how many pictures she'd taken. She had a quill that moved in the air that was smoking with its speed in transcribing the conversation, and Harry wondered what would come of it all when it appeared in The Daily Prophet, as Skeeter claimed she reported to.
The chamber doors burst open and Remus and Tonks came sprinting in, breathless and ragged.
"Where's Dumbledore?" demanded Remus.
"Harry, you didn't—" began Tonks.
"'E had 'ze Veritaserum," Fleur said disdainfully. "'E eez not lying."
"Where's Sirius?" Remus glanced around the room, looking suspiciously at everyone gathered, while Tonks accosted Crouch Sr. and Bagman.
"He got in a fight with Snape and Karkaroff," Harry said. "I don't know where they went."
Dumbledore came back into the chamber and Remus left Harry's side instantly to talk to him. Dumbledore joined Crouch Sr., Bagman, and Tonks. Not wanting to be left out, Maxime joined them too, which left Harry, Cedric, Fleur, and Viktor standing awkwardly on the side of the room.
"I'm sorry," Harry muttered close to Cedric. "I didn't mean—"
"Don't apologize," Cedric replied evenly. "It's not your fault. You just took the Veritaserum and your…family?" Harry nodded, and Cedric continued. "Your family doesn't want you to compete. You shouldn't have to if you didn't volunteer."
Harry still had the lingering desire to be Hogwarts champion – but not like this. Not when it was surrounded by intrigue, fistfights, a zealous reporter, and his family fighting against it every step of the way.
Sirius and Karkaroff returned to the chamber, both recently healed and escorted by both Madam Pomfrey and Professor McGonagall. The four of them joined the gathering around Dumbledore, but Harry still couldn't discern what they were saying.
The rapid murmuring stopped abruptly. Harry saw Remus, Tonks, and Sirius all glance sideways at each other before setting their eyes on Harry.
Dumbledore cleared his throat and beckoned for the four Triwizard champions to come forward.
"It would seem that this magical competition is binding and cannot be undone. Therefore, all four of you shall compete, including Mr. Potter. In the meantime, however, we will, with the cooperation of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, investigate just how Mr. Potter's name was entered into the Goblet of Fire. For now, I suggest the champions pose for the photograph Miss Skeeter so desires."
Dumbledore's hands were on his hips; he glared at Skeeter, which nearly made Harry laugh, as he hardly ever saw Dumbledore so ruffled.
"And an interview with each champion, of course—"
"Not Harry," Remus said firmly. "He's underage and as his guardians, we can refuse on his behalf."
"I can talk a little," Harry offered. "Just to say I didn't put my name in?"
"That's already covered, dear," Skeeter said, walking up to Harry with a gleam in her eyes. "Let's get to know the real Harry Potter – tragic hero of only 12—"
"I'm 14—"
"That's enough," Tonks snapped at Skeeter. "You can tell your readers that Harry's 14, didn't put his name in the Goblet of Fire, and is an unwilling participant. Now get out of our way so we can talk to him."
Skeeter began saying something but Tonks, Remus, and Sirius pushed past her to surround Harry.
"Crouch has a stick up his arse and insists you have to compete," Tonks whispered, as she cast a Muffling Charm around the four of them. "We tried, Harry, but you've got to do it."
"You've got to do it alone," Remus said quietly. "We asked if we could help you, seeing as you're underage, but they won't let us. You can write to us, but we can't help you."
"I'll be here, of course," Sirius added, as Remus and Tonks nodded enthusiastically. "I don't know if this has anything to do with Voldemort, but I'm not letting you out of my sight."
"Great," Harry said tonelessly. He peered over Tonks's shoulder. Viktor and Karkaroff were deep in discussion, glaring daggers at everyone around them. Fleur and Maxime were keeping to themselves as well, while Cedric stood uncomfortably next to Dumbledore, Snape, Crouch, Bagman, and Madam Pomfrey.
"Can I see the Map?" Remus whispered to Sirius.
Sirius handed the old, faded parchment to Remus. Harry looked over the top of the Marauder's Map to see that all the dots were in their proper places. Remus frowned, scanning the Map in all its corners, but he scowled as he put it away.
"I did the same earlier," Sirius said bitterly. "I thought – well, it doesn't matter. Whoever's done this is in the castle and they won't make Snivellus or Karkaroff take Veritaserum."
"What about the Imperius Curse?" asked Remus. "Any one of them could be under it."
"We won't know until we do the investigation," replied Tonks. "I'm going to ask Mad-Eye for help. He's retired but he has a history with Karkaroff."
"Wait, shh—" Sirius took a peek over Remus's shoulder. "I think they're coming for us. Moony and Tonks, you let me know if you find anything?"
Remus, Sirius, and Tonks had an unspoken conversation with their eyes and facial expressions. Lost, Harry stood back and watched as they made decisions without consulting him.
The buzzing of the Muffling Charm lifted and Dumbledore came around to meet them.
"I will stay in touch with all of you," Dumbledore said calmly. He turned to Harry, his blue eyes piercing as ever, and exhaled slowly. "Harry, Professor McGonagall will take you to Gryffindor Tower and inform your housemates of the news."
Remus and Tonks hugged Harry tightly before McGonagall led him out of the chamber and to the fifth floor tower.
Harry hoped it wouldn't be the last time he saw either of them alive – or, he thought, swallowing hard, the last time they'd see him alive.