They had a thirty minute drive to the Cullen residence. It was nearing lunch time and Carlisle was certain Bella could not have eaten. There were two restaurants in town that he often heard his hospital coworkers rave over. Reaching for his cell phone, he called Esme and asked her to pick up lunch for Bella from one of them.
Setting the phone back in his shirt pocket, he looked over at Bella. So far she had spent the drive staring out the side window, watching the scenery flash by at high speed. She hadn't said a word. Carlisle thought about trying to pull her into a discussion, but in the end decided to let her be. There would be enough time for talking when they reached the house. He was under no illusions that she had come along willingly, but he hoped her outlook would change when she heard what they had to say. Why they had truly left all those long years ago.
Instead he took the time to study her. Her brown hair was shorter than it had been, but still had a shine to it and hung in gentle waves just past her shoulders. Her skin was still pale, more than normal but he chocked that up to the nomad encounter. She had a general sadness about her, yet she seemed healthy. The doctor in him couldn't help but observe her vital signs that were audible to him. All checked normal.
Her clothes were in decent condition, the choices classic Bella. He chuckled as he thought of how appalled Alice would be when she saw the sensible shoes and tee shirt. The only jewelry he noticed was a small charm bracelet that peaked out from under the sleeve of her jacket. The only charm visible appeared to be an animal of some sort.
She carried a dark purple backpack that at present rested on the floorboard between her feet.
Carlisle slowed the powerful Mercedes as he turned off the public road onto their long private drive. He wondered what the 23 year old Bella would think of this house. They had only moved in six months ago and Esme was still working on renovations. Normally, she would be about finished, but her heart hadn't been in the task since leaving Forks. So while the house was nearing completion, it was not quite there. The addition Esme was building had only begun this past week. In truth, the same could be said of them all.
He knew Bella had no idea just how much of an impact her loss had been on this family.
He pulled to a stop inside the attached garage. Jasper stepped from the car without preamble. Carlisle was proud of how well he had handled being so close to Bella for so long.
He flashed around to the passenger side and opened the door as Bella was unbuckling herself. Reaching in, he picked up her backpack, then offered his arm to assist her from the car. This time she accepted and placed her left hand in his. He guided her out of the vehicle, through the garage and into the newly renovated kitchen.
Standing there, in the large, open and modern kitchen, was the rest of the picture perfect Cullen family, with one very conspicuous absence. Bella forced her mind away from him and focused instead on those standing before her. Esme, with her caramel hair and hands clasped hopefully in front of her. Energetic little Alice bouncing on her toes with a smile on her face. Bored Rosalie, leaning against the cabinets and staring at her nails. And finally a grinning Emmett who spoke first, "Hey Bellybean, I was gonna give you a bear hug but Alice said that would overwhelm you and we should let you settle in first!"
Bella didn't know how to react. She wanted to hug them all, even Rosalie, and at the same time she wanted to turn around and high tail it back to her dorm. They were being nice to her because of the almost attack tonight, but logically Bella knew that was all it was. So she kept a neutral face and simply said, "Hello Emmett."
Esme stepped forward and opened her arms. She felt Carlisle's hand come to rest on her shoulder and give a reassuring squeeze. Bella couldn't resist, she stepped into the hug from the woman she had once considered a mother to her.
Esme spoke as she released her, "It's so good to see you Bella, I've missed you so." Holding out her hand she indicated the dining room behind them. "I'm sure you're hungry, I have lunch waiting for you here." Ever the hostess, she continued, "Allow me to take your jacket so you can get comfortable."
Bella felt Jasper eye her as her discomfort skyrocketed. She carefully kept her face schooled. No way was she letting these specimens of perfection see her scars. It didn't bother Bella one bit for humans to view them, Bella knew how lucky she was to be alive. That she had survived something she shouldn't have. Yet letting the Cullens see them was an entirely different story.
Bella dodged away from Esme's hand waiting to take the jacket, "That's ok Esme, I'd prefer to keep it on." She glanced at Carlisle daring him to disagree when she continued, "Actually, I don't plan to stay very long. I'd like to head back to my dorm shortly. Lots of homework, you know?"
Carlisle sighed, "Come and eat while we talk Bella. We will discuss the possibilities of you returning to your dorm after."
Bella didn't like the sound of that. What did Carlisle mean by 'possibilities'? Of course she would return to her dorm!
Jasper rolled a wave of calm over the increasingly incensed Bella as Alice pipped up, "Yes, come eat while we talk." He knew this was going to be a long afternoon. Clearly the family had done a number on Bella.
The family took seats around the table, Bella was placed next to Carlisle's end seat where a covered plate awaited her with silverware and a glass of water.
Esme whisked the cover off the plate and said, "I remembered how much you enjoyed steak so I picked you up a nice one from the local steakhouse."
Sheer panic hit Bella when she saw the meal in front of her. A nice juicy steak, loaded baked potato and steamed chunks of broccoli covered in melted cheese sat in front of her. All of which would require the use of the fork and steak knife together. Sure, Bella had enough control in her right arm that she could somewhat stabilize the fork while her left utilized the knife. But there would be no way to hide her debilitating injury from the perfect creatures around her. And, she was self-aware enough to know she would likely cut herself when the fork inevitably slipped and interfered with the knife. All while surrounded by six vampires. She felt an unwelcome sense of déjà vu.
A sound of distress escaped her as she felt the calm Jasper had covered her with earlier increase and yet fail to battle back the rising tide of panic. So what that she hadn't eaten since her small apple at six am. It didn't matter that she had had a long morning of classes and was currently famished. Or that it seemed she had hours of discussion to make it through before Carlisle might relent and return her to the city. There was only one way to salvage this situation and keep her secret. She gently reached up with her left hand and pushed the plate away. Forcing herself to smile she said, "Thank you Esme, it looks wonderful but I'm really not hungry."
She was congratulating herself on what she thought was an excellent performance when it happened. Her stomach growled. And not just for the supernatural hearing of the creatures around her, no her stomach contradicted her decision so loudly she was certain the entire county now knew she was hungry.
Emmett's laughter shook the table, "Bellybear your stomach doesn't agree with you. Sounds like it thinks your throat's been cut!"
Bella's cheeks flooded in mortification. She clasped her hands on her lap, and said nothing.
Carlisle raised an eyebrow at her and nudged the plate back. "Bella, if you would prefer privacy while you eat, that can be arranged."
The offer of privacy would keep her secret intact, but she knew she would still end up accidentally slicing herself. She thought about falling back on her clumsiness as an excuse to have them cut the meat for her, but she was too proud for that. And honestly she was afraid she'd offend Jasper. Regardless of how useless the Cullen's viewed her, she knew Jasper must have blamed himself for her birthday disaster. In the end, Bella's only response was to shake her head even as her stomach protested a second time.
As she sat there, the Cullen's all looked at each other with confusion. Alice's eyes blanked as she tried out various tactics to get Bella to eat. Finally, she too shook her head indicating failure. Carlisle then looked at Jasper and cocked an eyebrow.
Below her hearing he gave his assessment,"She's feeling so much panic and embarrassment that I'm not having much effect countering it. There is also a strong layer of determination."
Carlisle examined Bella. She sat there looking utterly dejected and ashamed. Humiliated really. Despite her claims of being comfortable, he could see signs that the jacket was making her overly warm. He thought about leaving her to Esme's gentle care, but suspected something more than being uncomfortable around the family was going on. His medical intuition flickered.
Looking at his family, he ordered, "Leave us" in a voice loud enough for human ears. He knew Bella would understand it was just an illusion of privacy – she was well aware of just how acute their senses were – but he hoped it would be enough.
Reaching over, he recovered her plate to keep the food warm while he attempted to pull the problem from Bella. Then he reached his arm out to bridge the distance between them, resting his palm on the table surface.
He considered and discarded several ways to start the conversation before he finally spoke. It was difficult since he knew Bella was still laboring under the illusion that she had been nothing more than a novelty to them all those years ago.
Reaching out, he tucked his finger under her chin and forced her eyes to his. "Bella, since we have yet to begin our discussions and explain the truth of our departure to you, I know your current understanding of it must make it difficult to trust us. Yet I assure you, you can do exactly that. Everyone here cares for you deeply and once we have cleared the air, you'll understand that. And dare I hope, believe that. I know you're not there yet, rightfully so."
He reached up with his free hand and squeezed her shoulder again, "Sweetheart, you are obviously overheating in that jacket, beyond hungry and yet you won't resolve either issue even knowing I will not allow let you leave tonight." Firming his voice a little, he continued, "And Bella, you are not leaving this house tonight. Not after those nomads singled you out, and for certain not after you admitted to Jasper that it wasn't the first time."
Gentling his voice again, he suggested, "Since you're clearly not ready to trust us, perhaps you can trust the doctor in me Bella? I suspect the reason for your jacket and refusal to eat is more physical than emotional. So let Dr Cullen assist, if you can't find it in you to trust me."
His heart broke as he watched her fighting back tears. He despised himself for forcing her into a corner like this but he had little choice. He wouldn't let her sit there and starve through a family meeting that would likely last the remainder of the day, but nor could they adequately protect her in a dorm.
Still, Bella hiked her chin up and said, "School project, Dr Cullen. Researching the effects of a hunger strike on the human body." Narrowing her eyes at him, she challenged, "Coincidently, the length of my research is exactly as long as it takes to return to my dorm." The way she said his name, made it clear she didn't trust the doctor any more than the man.
A booming chuckle could be heard coming from Emmett. Carlisle sighed, "I know I deserve that. After the way we left, we all deserve your mistrust. So how about a truce? You let me help with whatever is wrong with the meal situation, and," here Carlisle narrowed his eyes, "I won't stick a feeding tube down your throat when you eventually faint from hunger?"
"Some truce," Bella mumbled. Her eyes searched his face and saw the resolve. She also saw the perfection. Their kindness didn't fool her, she was no Cullen. As soon as they felt they had done their duty, she would be yesterdays news again.
She allowed that truth to firm her spine. No way was she letting them in on her secret. So she let the lies flow from her lips again, "It's a little chilly in here and I'm simply not hungry. Let's get whatever you want to talk about over with because I don't live here." As much as she still loved them all, she was not a simpering teenager to be pushed in the direction they wanted. If Carlisle intended to keep her here, she would make dang sure he knew it was against her will.
Carlisle sat back, thinking over strategy. He was failing to get through to her; that somewhat surprised him as he was used to a Bella more than willing to cooperate with them and whom trusted them implicitly. Yet he didn't blame her in the least – the Cullen's had knowingly and intentionally broken that trust. What reason did Bella have to cooperate?
Gently, he spelled the medical reality out to her. "First Isabella, your temperature has climbed two degrees since the others left the room; your face is flushed and a sheen of sweat is building on your forehead. There is no way you are chilly – in fact, I would say you are well on your way to becoming overheated."
"Second, you were paler than normal when you and Jasper arrived, and aside from your trademark blushes, that fact hasn't changed. Now, I'm certain that is a side effect of the adrenaline rush you must have experienced this afternoon. Your body is in need of sugar to handle that."
"Thirdly, you cannot deny you are hungry; given the volume of your stomachs' protest I'd wager you haven't eaten all morning."
Reaching across to her, he gently gripped her chin in his hand, "Put all those factors together Sweetheart and it's just a matter of when, not if, you pass out. So you can let me help you now, while you control the situation – or I can help you after you are unconscious. At which time I'll be forced to remove the jacket anyway to insert an IV."
He let that sink in and then said, "I would offer you privacy and a shirt to change into, but my intuition tells me your jacket and meal are the same issue..."
Bella seemed to crumple before him as she accepted her only choice was to work with Carlisle. Still, she sat frozen for several long minutes. Finally, with a shaky left hand, he watched her reach up and release the two lower buttons that had secured her jacket half closed. She grasped the edge of the sleeve with her right fingers and pulled her left arm free. Then she took a deep breath, and pulled the jacket off her right arm. She sat unmoving, with her chin up and waited for Carlisle's response…
Beneath the jacket, Bella was wearing a cute, contoured purple teeshirt. But that was not what caused Carlisle to freeze in the unnatural stillness of his kind. Nor was it what caused the remaining halves of his heart to absolutely shatter into a pile of jagged pieces.
The reason for that was almost 400 years of experience as both a vampire and doctor. Carlisle had seen many injuries over those long centuries, caused by accidents, instruments of war and his kind. As he stared with his enhanced eyesight at the jagged scar that encircled Bella's arm a few inches below the end of her sleeve, and the second set of scars just above her wrist, he knew beyond a doubt what had caused them. And furthermore, that they; no, that he himself held full responsibility for the horrendous injury Bella had clearly suffered.
He reached out a hand and gently caressed the very tangible evidence of their betrayal before turning eyes filled with shame on the young woman before him who now had tears tracking down her cheeks.
In the blink of an eye, Carlisle grabbed her in his arms, tucked her on his lap and rested his face against her head. Vehemently, he moaned, "Oh baby girl what have we done to you?!" And then the consummate, ever professional Carlisle Cullen promptly dissolved into shuddering, quaking, tearless sobs.
The family had moved into the living room when Carlisle had ordered them out, and at the sound of Carlisle's cries, they flew back into the dining room. They knew Bella had been crying – they could all smell the salt when the first tear formed, but all they could see was Bella wrapped up in Carlisle's arms. His reaction seemed to have stunned her, for she sat there unmoving, with silent tears flowing. She no longer wore her jacket, but since her right arm was against Carlisle's chest, they could see no reason for the vision before them.
So they simply stood there.
As for Bella, she was stunned. She hadn't expected outright scorn but rather false platitudes and a show of pretending to care. Yet there was no way this reaction was fake. Carlisle at least truly cared about Bella's suffering; more than that, he seemed to blame himself. She sat there allowing herself to take comfort from his arms, her left hand grasping his shirt. As the truth sunk in, she melted into his embrace and waited for his cries to abate.
Five years ago Bella had believed this man - whom she had viewed as a father - had loved her before Edward had pulled the wool off her eyes. Watching his reaction to the knowledge of her injury, she finally became willing to listen to whatever it was Carlisle wanted the family to tell her.
Esme was the first to make a move. As Carlisle seemed to finally get control of himself, she walked up behind him, and placed her hand on his back. "What can I do love?"
Carlisle mentally pulled himself together. Using his thumbs, he wiped the tears from Bella's cheeks. He thought of the meal Bella had been served and her obstinate refusal of it. A meal like that required two working hands. Ignoring Esme's question for the moment, he asked Bella, "You can't use it can you Sweetheart?"
Bella's eyes widened in fright for a moment. Carlisle rubbed his thumb in soothing circles on Bella's uninjured arm. Correctly interpreting her reason for distress, he sought to reassure her, "You are safe here Bella. No one will judge you any less."
So Bella forced herself to continue what she had started when she removed her jacket by admitting, "No Carlisle, I can't use it. At least not well enough for present company." Then she blushed and looked back at her lap.
At first the phrase 'present company' confused him. But then Carlisle thought about the steak knife sitting next to her dinner plate, and how that simple utensil might make a difference with a change of company.
"Ah, you believe you would cut yourself."
Bella gave a quick single nod, but that was enough of an answer.
"Are there other injuries Sweetheart?"
"No, it's just the arm."
Jasper couldn't take any more. He had been the only one to touch her before Carlisle, yet with Carlisle's control and familiarity with humans, there was no way Jasper would believe Carlisle had wounded Bella. Bella hadn't known of the nomads presence before he encountered her, so they hadn't harmed her either. That left only him. He. Jasper. The weakest link in the family, once again responsible for hurting their human member. Filled with guilt and self-revulsion, Jasper sat on his hunches and apologized, "Bella, I am so deeply sorry for carelessly injuring you. I didn't even realize I had done so. How bad is it?"
Surprised right out of her embarrassment at Jasper's assumption of fault, Bella hurried to reassure him, "Oh no Jasper, you didn't hurt me!"
Jasper shook his head, he didn't believe her. "Sorry Bella, but those nomads never touched you, and Carlisle is far too controlled to have accidentally harmed you. That leaves me."
Bella's eyes softened with compassion. "I wasn't injured tonight Jasper. It's from three years ago."
Jasper was floored. Three years ago?! But then how to explain Carlisle's reaction and Bella's behavior?
Knowing the family deserved an explanation, Carlisle stood up, lifting Bella with him. He set her back in her chair and stepped away after giving Bella's arm one last rub. When all in the room could see her scars, Carlisle finally spoke.
"I reacted the way I did upon viewing Bella's arm. There is no doubt in my mind that one of our kind did that to her. I will forever regret believing Bella would be better off without our presence in her life. But let us first see about allowing Bella to eat her meal before we continue on this topic."
"Esme, love, I think Bella might enjoy a soothing cup of tea."
At this suggestion, Esme looked to Bella, waited for the girl to nod her head and moved off to the kitchen. Carlisle reached down and collected Bella's plate, intending to reheat her meal and precut it.
Emmett, being Emmett, spoke up, "I don't get it. So what if she has a scar. It sucks that some vamp hurt her, but she's sitting safe here with us. Why was Bella acting so unBella and why did you freak out Carlisle?"
This was followed by a clapping sound and "Ow, don't hit me Rosie!"
Carlisle turned compassionate eyes on Bella, and braced his free hand on her shoulder before speaking, "Why is it such a big deal? Well son, because it instantly became clear to me that at some point after we abandoned Bella, someone with inhuman strength quite literally tore Bella's arm off. Obviously the surgeons managed to reattach it, but it would seem Bella didn't want us to know of her limited mobility with it." He gave her a gentle reassuring squeeze with his hand as he felt her cringing.
"Oh shit… oh shit!" Was all Emmett could say as he stood there with his jaw flapping like a fish out of water.
"Yes son, 'oh shit' fits quite well." Turning back to Bella, Carlisle continued, "I'll just be a moment to warm this for you Sweetheart." He gave her shoulder a final squeeze and walked off to the kitchen.
As Alice tentatively lowered herself into the chair besides Bella, Jasper could feel Bella's embarrassment begin to give way to anger. He thought back to Bella's earlier question right after the nomads had departed. 'Why did Alice send you this time?' Jasper had only focused on the fact that Bella's question meant she had previous encounters with their kind after the Cullen's departure. He didn't stop to think about what it would say to Bella that they hadn't been there.
Alice slid her hand along the table towards Bella. "Bella? Why didn't you want us to know?"
Jasper sent yet another wave of calm as Bella's anger ratcheted up, "Are you kidding me Alice?! Why didn't I want a family of perfect vampires to know that the clumsy, useless human they pretended to play house with five years ago needed her meal cut for her like a little kid? Are you fucking kidding me?!"
Alice froze, "I suppose I earned that."
Surprisingly, it was Rosalie who spoke next, "We all deserve that Bella. Everyone here knows what Edward said to you, so we all deserve that. But Bella, you are wrong. While I'm certainly no fan of yours, you're not useless to this family. Working arm, or no arm, no one here views you as anything less than an equal."
Carlisle and Esme returned to the dining room with a hot cup of tea, and her freshly warmed and sliced meal. Carlisle set the plate in front of her and then lifted her chin with his finger again, "Rose is correct Bella. This family has done you an egregious disservice, but you have always been our equal. Your arm does not diminish you in any way."
With a smile that didn't reach his eyes he said, "Eat up."
Bella finally picked up the fork with her left hand and tucked into her lunch.
The Cullen's resettled around the table and did their best not to watch Bella eat. It was obvious their usual scrutiny would not be welcomed.
Carlisle waited until Bella's pace had slowed some. Assuming she had resolved the worst of her hunger pains, he began to speak while she continued her meal.
"Bella, we owe you the deepest apologies for what we did five years ago. I do not speak lightly when I say that leaving you the way we did may very well have been one of the greatest mistakes of my existence."
Bella looked up from her plate. She set her fork down and reached for her water glass to wash down the bite of mashed potatoes she was currently chewing. Then she shook her head, "No Carlisle, I don't blame you for leaving. I wish you all hadn't made me feel a part of this family when I was not, but I don't blame you for leaving."
Carlisle closed his eyes. He knew this wouldn't be easy but he was determined to get it out. "You don't understand Bella, you were very much a part of this family. And though I know it hasn't seemed it to you, you have been a missing member of this family ever since. Our leaving was the lie."
He held up a hand to forestall Bella's response, "Let me explain. You remember the conversation you and I had regarding Edward's belief in your soul while I stitched your wounded arm on your birthday?"
At Bella's nod, he continued, "Edward was never going to change his mind Bella. And I was unwilling to change you against his wishes, despite what I knew you desired. And while it was Jasper who attacked you that night, the others came very close to losing their control as well."
Carlisle could see the toll this trip down memory lane was taking on Bella, so he gentled his voice for the next part, "That night was everything Edward feared Bella. Our presence in your life had brought you to the attention of James and now our own family, YOUR own family, had threatened your life. Edward became convinced you were safest away from us. In the end, he convinced most of us of that. Most importantly, he convinced me of that. So we left. And we intentionally did it in a way that would leave you believing you meant nothing to us, both in the hopes that it would allow you to move on with your life, and prevent you from trying to find us. And Edward…Edward left you believing you meant nothing to him so you would go on with your life, find a human to love and be loved in return. To build a family with, something he could never give you."
Bella was crying now. She shook her head in earnest.
Carlisle reached his arm across the space between them. Wrapping his hand around her cheek, "I won't make Edward's arguments for him, that's for him to do when he returns. Bella, do you believe my reaction to your arm was faked?"
Bella paled at the mention of Edward's return. She absolutely didn't want to face him, yet at the same time she so desperately wanted to see him. Focusing back on Carlisle's question, she answered, "No Carlisle. I don't believe that was an act."
Looking in her eyes so she could see his sincerity, he said, "Your last name may be Swan, but you are a Cullen, Bella. You became a Cullen when we were all in Forks, you were a Cullen when we left, and you've been a Cullen all this time. We don't deserve to call you such, but you are very much a daughter to both Esme and I."
Bella looked back at her lap. She fiddled with the fingers of her right hand and looked back up. Starting with Esme, Bella made eye contact with each of those she once called family. She searched their faces and saw only an earnest desire that she believe them. She couldn't find a lie in any of their eyes, or even a disagreement in Rosalie's. So this then was the truth. They had really left out of some misguided plan to protect her.
Bella didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Forget the supernatural threats, had they forgotten about Tyler's van? Port Angeles?
Picking up her cooling teacup, Bella took a sip to collect herself. Looking first at Jasper and Alice, then settling her gaze on Carlisle, she said, "Alright. I believe you all. That still leaves the question I asked Jasper earlier. Why now? Why after all this time, after all I've gone through, did you choose these nomads to step in and protect me? And to tell me the truth, instead of just disappearing again?"
Carlisle rubbed his hands over his face in a very human gesture of frustration, "I think you know why we are telling you the truth instead of simply disappearing Bella. The nomads made it glaringly obvious how wrong our belief that you would be safe from our world was. And this family has missed you terribly. So like it or not, we are back and won't be leaving you behind."
"As for why this time, why these nomads? Bella, sweetheart, we were all under the apparently false belief that you were living a happy, healthy, normal human life. Please believe, whatever attack you suffered prior to these nomads, we had no idea of. Or we would have been there. Bella, even if your injury had occurred in a very human accident, at the very least I would have been there for you. Never would we have knowingly left you to suffer something so life altering alone."
Bella couldn't stop herself. She looked right at Alice. After all this time Alice had seen the nomads but nothing else?
Jasper felt Bella's disbelief when Bella looked at his wife. Softly, but insistently, he said, "She didn't see Bella. She gave her word to Edward to not search your future, so we wouldn't be tempted to interfere as you moved on with someone new. Alice loves you dearly, there is nothing in the world that would have stopped her from coming to you if she knew you were in danger. Just like when she saw the nomads attacking you today. Carlisle was never going to reach you in time. He would have arrived to find your drained body. I was the only one close enough and Alice absolutely begged me to get to you even though I fully believed I'd end up doing the same to you."
"Is Jasper right Alice? You really saw nothing at all those first two years?" Bella questioned.
"I swear to you Bella, the first vision I've had of you since we left Forks was today's attack." Alice insisted.
It was Bella's turn to scrub her good hand over her face. "Call me a sucker but I believe you Alice."
Bella looked at her tea cup and decided she needed both a break and preferably something stiffer to drink. Turning to Carlisle she said, "I don't supposed you have something stronger to drink here do you?"
Carlisle's eyebrow shot up.
"I'm twenty three Carlisle, not eighteen. And if you're going to make me walk down memory lane any farther today I'm really going to need something more than a soothing cup of tea."
Carlisle grinned, "Twenty three is a good age if I do say so myself. As it so happens, I keep some props in my office to offer should a colleague stop by. Do you like bourbon?"
Sighing Bella answered, "That sounds perfect right about now."
"On or off the rocks?"
"On is probably a good idea. I have a feeling I'm going to owe you a bottle by the time this discussion is through."
"Coming right up," Carlisle said and simply disappeared.
Bella then looked to Esme, "May I use your restroom Esme?"
"Of course dear, right this way," Esme said and stood up to show Bella the restroom off the kitchen.
Bella took her time using the facilities and splashing cool water on her face. She really wasn't looking forward to this next part of the conversation. It was clear the Cullen's were in for another shock. She let out a humorless chuckle as she considered their references to the 'attack'. Wait until they found out that was only one of many.
She wondered what they would think of the pack. Should she keep the new pack a secret? Yet the Cullen's did know of their existence, had in fact honored the treaty even when they believed the pack to be extinct. So she wouldn't be betraying her friends in telling the Cullen's of the new pack. And they were inarguably tied into the story of those first two years. She owed the pack her life several times over.
Bella used the hand towel to dry her face off. Was she really doing this? Trusting the Cullen's after all these years? Yes, yes she was. Oh she didn't believe for a second that Edward loved her – she'd never forgotten seeing the truth in his eyes that night. And perhaps that's the real reason he convinced the others she would be better off without them. So he wouldn't have to continue to face the ex-girlfriend he had strung along for the better part of a year.
Bella hugged herself as the old, familiar hole cut through her chest. It had made its presence known several times already today. Not that she was surprised. Somehow though, the edges felt just the tiniest bit smaller with the knowledge that she hadn't truly been unloved by the family.
Grasping the doorknob, Bella walked out of the bathroom and back to the dining room to face her past.