HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

This chapter is dedicated to Thoththo! I really appreciate everyone's reviews and questions - and thank you all so much for reading and following my stories. BTW, I have a few new ones up, and some others over on the Archive of our Own website: ao3

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own. I would also love to hear your advice and suggestions!

Thinking

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking

Emphasis

Warmth.

Kakashi snuggled further into the softness surrounding him. Toads were floating and hopping happily, and for some reason, he was unbothered by his warrior pack of ninken dancing around with smaller toads to a strange tune featuring the sounds of locusts, those weird noises rabbits make, and yowls: it was beautiful. A firefox ran by and attacked a cat. He wasn't sure he'd ever felt so happy: that particular cat had needed to die for decades now. Breathing in deeply, he smelled something that made his stomach growl, which finally began to return him to the waking world.

He would've tensed at the light filtering under his eyelids, but first: he was just so comfortable. Secondly: he was a well-trained elite shinobi and something was off. If an enemy was present, he needed to feign sleep until he analyzed the situation. He focused chakra into his ears at the same time he smelled lilacs, oil: Naruto? His hand still twitched for his weapons pouch, but he was just so unnaturally drowsy. Realizing he had taken off his weapons last night, he barely opened his eyes to see what was going on.

His Icha-Icha Paradise was being held almost directly in front of him.

"Morning, Kakashi. I was wondering when you were going to wake up. You can go back to sleep if you want, though," Naruto said softly.

Kakashi realized the position he was in. Good gods, he was curled around her like a koala. He began unwrapping himself from her frame and immediately checked to make sure his mask was in place. Thank the gods it was because he could feel himself blushing like a schoolgirl.

"Is this possible? I mean - wouldn't it hurt?" Naru asked.

Kakashi frowned. What is she talking about - what did I miss? His yawn ended but his mouth opened back up in shock. There laying next to him, under his numb arm was his little wife, reading his favorite book.

"You know this one is different from what I've seen…" Naru looked over to see his wide biological eye looking at her. The Sharingan eye that she knew was there was still closed since his headband was off. "Oh! The book I mean! Your's has pictures and stuff."

Kakashi threw back his head and looked away from her in embarrassment. "Hai." He paused as her eyebrows shot up - he realized when he had the nerve to look at her again - and he nearly groaned. "Maa, Limited Special Edition and all. Gomen."

She paused for a moment, taking in his cute reaction - plus the page she was looking at. "There's nothing to apologize for. But seriously, Kakashi, wouldn't this hurt?"

She is way too comfortable talking about this stuff! Or maybe he was a closet-prude. Seeing her continuing to search his face for an answer, he let out the breath he'd been holding, closing his one open eye as he spoke. "Maa…. If, uh… Well…"

Stop stammering, Hatake! Just answer the question and get it over with!

Sighing, he forcefully marched into this potential battleground of a conversation. "Maa, it can hurt somewhat. But if an, umm, a woman's partner is… considerate, yeah: 'considerate' - it won't hurt for long or very much if he knows... If the man is skilled, say," he finished in frustration and utter humiliation. He finally looked over briefly to his wife, who was looking at him as if he'd grown another head. A blush grew on her face.

"Ano, I meant this specific position right here, ya know," she said shyly, avoiding his eyes. Scrunching up her face in determination, she tapped the book on a page full of sexual position diagrams exactly where she'd been pointing in the first place.

He couldn't help but see which diagram she was talking about and paled, then quickly looked away. Yes, Jiraiya-sama had personally assured him when he was younger that that particular position was not only possible but brought the "ultimate pleasure to both partners."

He said that about all of them, though, at one time or another.

Was he ever going to try that one? Fuck no! How could he bend like that? How could his dick bend like that? He didn't even want to think of it! Realizing what he just thought, he brought the leg closest to Naruto protectively over his family jewels. Finally, he replied. "Supposedly it is - but it's not something I will try…"

"Thank the gods for that," she said in a deadpanned voice.

Realizing that she was thinking about being in that position with him - sheesh - Naru even just thinking about having sex with him, in general, made him jump out of the chair. Naru got up to join her clone in the kitchen, finishing up breakfast preparations as she kept her back to him. He glanced at her and nearly chuckled at her bright red face that avoided his eye as she put the delicious-smelling food on plates and bowls on the table. He should tease her but felt too embarrassed and worried about Kami-only-knows-what bold thing she might say in return. Eventually, he thanked her for breakfast and went upstairs to take a shower. She hadn't looked up at him once during their meal, and he'd seen her face burning a shade of red the entire time.

"So… Pervert Junior thinks he's skilled, ne?"

Naru took in a deep breath. "Can you not keep your big nose out of anything?!" she heatedly responded.

"I'm only here to warn you that he may over-estimate his skill in rutting, considering how awkward the silver ninken is."

Naruto stood frozen, mouth hanging open at his words. "No, no - he's probably not!" She groaned and covered her face with her hands.

Kurama just chuckled at her: she was fun to annoy. He really did doubt the Number 2 Pervert's skill, though.

"I have seen much in my time kit, both in and out of my vessels." Naruto looked up at him in concern; he sounded very serious. "For example when mating, your own sire was particularly…" Naru began yelling and gagging, realizing that he was still going on about sex, fingers blocking her ears. She bumped into one wall of her mindscape after another as she ran to exit the sewers.

When Kakashi opened his bedroom door he wasn't expecting to see his little wife sitting cross-legged with wet hair and a serious face directly outside of his room.

Naruto looked up at her "husband" and wondered how bad this would be. She knew she'd get emotional, but she worried about Kakashi seeing what was left for her in her parents' scrolls. She thought that she and Kakashi were doing pretty well together, and she loved getting to know him better and just being closer to him every day. Knowing the man as she did in her past life, though, she wondered if Kakashi would have one of those relapses she'd seen him have before. It was definitely the last thing she wanted to have happen, and also the last thing they needed in their budding relationship.

"Hmm, never realized you were a stalker, Naruto-chan," the man said, sounding completely serious as his eyebrow lifted. He was looking down on her as if she was some kind of perverted harasser.

Immediately Naru became flustered. She jumped up and poked him in the chest. "Don't underestimate me, Hatake."

His eyebrow only went higher under all of that shaggy gravity-defying hair. She immediately wilted, looking disheveled. He smirked under his mask: too easy.

"Looking at me like I'm some kind of stalker or fangirl," she muttered. "I'll never be one of those creeps."

Probably.

"Mou, the warrior princess doesn't like me: Naru-hime's so mean."

He heard her say under her breath, "Why did I even come to you, you masked figurative bastard?"

She yanked his arm and dragged him downstairs. He grinned under his mask, making her work to get moving at all. His mocking attitude changed, however, once they made it down to the kitchen. Naruto bent down to the wine refrigerator and opened the glass door. Taking out two bottles of sake, she nodded her head, pushing one toward him and opening the other. She pulled a Tsunade and drank it down before he could even say anything, all in one go. She reached down to pull out another bottle and he blocked her.

"Naru-chan, you're too young to drink…" her younger husband began to argue.

She looked up with a blank face. "Old enough to kill, old enough to drink…" ...Old enough to fuck. Plus I'm older than you anyway. She'd bought all the booze in the house! Who was he to say?

"Naruto," her husband began to chastise.

"Scrolls," she replied. He frowned at her, wondering what she was on about before his eye widened dramatically as his chest heaved.

Ah, he remembers now.

Kakashi held out his now-open bottle and gestured her toward the wine fridge. She immediately grabbed another bottle and opened it as well. The Jonin held out his bottle toward her, "Kanpai."

She returned the toast with an "otsukaresama deshita," and they guzzled their sake. Both Hatakes repeated this again and again, discussing what to do with the scrolls on and off, and eventually began to make stupid, and sometimes morbid jokes. Not directly regarding her deceased parents of course.

Kurama glared warily as he watched the scene his container was engaging in. He understood all too well that she was afraid. He'd never admit he was nervous, wondering what was in the scrolls, too. Hopefully, there wasn't something in there that would forever imprison him and his siblings. He trusted Naruto, but...

What is the Pervert thinking? He was the wildcard in this situation. Normally he'd burn off alcohol as he would any other poison in the kit. But she needed this: something to numb the pain, especially if the ninken reacted badly.

If he does I'll blow fire out of her mouth whether she likes it or not. Kurama settled down on his belly and watched his kit and her intended mate get somewhere between what humans called tipsy and drunk and could only sigh. As always, he'd keep an eye on her, though. Tch: the things I do for you.

"Seal."

"Do what now?" Naruto said out loud looking at her surroundings. Thankfully Kakashi was knocking back another bottle and didn't seem to notice that she'd just spoken aloud to the fox.

"Seal, kit! Seal your den down thoroughly."

She walked towards the wall to initiate the seal she had put down in each room, further enhancing their privacy. She looked back at her husband who had grabbed yet another bottle, but now had his head on the higher part of the counter and was humming. He has a nice voice. She stopped to admire it, but of course, Kurama nagged her into completing her work. Checking on Kakashi's position again, she felt safe to channel chakra into the seal, which in turn further secured the house. It also had a silencing element that only she could access. She'd added it to the silencing seals that were in each room.

Who knows why they had been in the house originally, but she appreciated them.

"Your sire placed the seals so that chibi you wouldn't hear the sounds of their coupling. Kushina was loud."

"Fucking hell, Kurama! Do you think I really want to know that stuff?"

Kurama shrugged his giant shoulders. He really didn't get what the problem was: he was only stating facts.

Naruto bent down and placed her head on the bar, too, looking at her husband's closed eyes. He's so cute - well, I think he is... If only I could get that mask off. He continued to hum something she'd never heard before, beautifully, she would add. Feeling her eyes beginning to close from his deep tenor, she bolted up just after his eye opened. He had given her a genuine smile and Naruto was ready: ready to face whatever was in those scrolls. She actually felt excitement pass through her, before the anxiety hit again. She grabbed a bag and began piling more sake bottles inside of it.

"Kit, that's enough," Kurama warned.

"Relax foxy-chaan," Naruto responded playfully.

Kurama rolled his eyes: he rarely saw her like this and was glad for it. His kit would get all clingy and sometimes drool in his hair when she drank too much. No matter how many times he'd threaten to eat her, the damn girl would just kiss him with her gross human lips.

"Really good sake like this only comes in these itsy-bitsy bottles. I'll. Be. Fiiiiiiiine! You know it yourself, 'Rama-mama!"

Inari-sama, help me; my vessel is a Complete. Dork. Naruto totally deserved the hangover he would refuse to help her with.

"Oi, Kashi-kun: you awake?" Naruto whispered - they had their heads on the counter again, facing one another.

He opened his eyes again and saw the prettiest blue he'd ever seen and the sun. So, so pretty… Oh, wait: it's Naruto! He let out a giggle, very little girl-worthy, and smiled at his mate. My mate is so pretty. "I'm awake! Maa, Naree: don't call me that, okay?" His mate didn't seem to know what she called him so he explained. "Back when I was a horrible brat, that's what people called me, ne? So don't call me that anymore." He snuggled over to her and rubbed his head on her arm like a cat.

"Oh! Okay. Gomen, gomen," she continued until his hand fell on her head, patting it rather forcefully, making her head repeatedly hit the bartop. She was glad he stopped, plus the way he was now running his hand through her hair felt nice. He smelled good, too. "Ano, are you ready to look at the scrolls, Kash?"

"Hai. And no one's called me that before, koi. I LIKE it!" He said those last words in a rushed growl, she was sure of it. He grabbed her hand and pulled her firmly against his side, throwing his arm heavily over her shoulder, and led his little wife to the room containing the scaries. He smiled down on her pretty face, but looked up and froze at what he saw in the room's open closet: a full set of his sensei's cloaks, flames on the bottom, and the word "Yondaime" emblazoned down the back.

Naruto realized immediately what had caught his attention: she'd had the same reaction to those cloaks last night. In her mind, however, she remembered fighting alongside her father in his edo-tensei form. Gods, she wanted him to be alive back then and even now. Her eyes watered up just thinking about it, but comforting Kakashi was more important. She put her arms around him and felt his racing heart. She pulled him over to the scrolls on the floor, finally leaving his frozen form to close the closet doors.

Kakashi looked panicked. When he finally spoke, it was filled with self-hate.

"...I should have been your big brother! I - I abandoned you! How can you ever forgive me? You shouldn't... You just - shouldn't! I'm not…"

She silenced him with a long kiss on his masked lips. Gods how she wanted to lower that mask, but he was freaking out right now, "Don't you get it? I do not want you as a brother!"

"I want you more - as something much more, ne?" Seeing his taken aback face - at least it wasn't filled with sorrow and panic now, she continued. "I couldn't tolerate you being my brother, Kash… I want you as much, much more…" She paused as she saw his eyes soften. "I want you as my husband, in every way."

Kakashi breathed in deeply before he ripped the mask off his face and kissed her hungrily. He pinned her to the floor and pushed his body between her legs, kissing down her neck, grabbing one of her legs up from underneath him into the crook of his elbow.

Naruto's heart was racing wildly as she wrapped her arms and legs around the man on top of her: her first love, her only love! She ran her nails through his thick hair before he grabbed them and forced them to her sides. Slowing, he worked his way down her body and unbuttoned her top with his mouth. He couldn't figure out how to take off her bra, so he just pulled it down as he pinned both her small hands in one of his. Growling, he took her hard nipple into his mouth as his hand ran all over her other breast. She winced only when he occasionally squeezed HARD.

He slowed again as he moved from one breast to the other, then he stopped.

Naruto came out of her lust-induced euphoria and looked down at him, but could only see the top of his head: his wild silver hair on her chest. Then she heard it: he began to softly snore. Completely pinned under 200-plus pounds of muscled sleeping manmeat, she was forced to listen to her asshole of a partner laugh his furry tails off.