DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Naruto universe but I do have an imagination of my own.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, "Naruto speaking to Kurama in her mindscape," etc.)

Emphasis

Biju, etc. speaking

Biju, etc. thinking

"I should learn to control myself with you."

Naruto looked at her husband in her thoroughly ravaged state and violently shook her head, signaling that she disagreed completely. Her bottom lip unconsciously stuck out at seeing the bruises on his face, and once again, she cursed Jiraiya. She wanted to heal Kakashi after Jiraiya finally left last night - and even before that - but Kakashi said he deserved the beating he got from her idiot godfather. ...Her godfather who finally admitted in the end that he thought that her father would most likely want the two of them to be together!

Her godfather, who knows that she's well past 30 - or has lived well past 30 years, anyway. He should be telling her not to go after a younger man.

As if Ero-Sennin would normally think that going after someone much younger was wrong. Damned perverted old man.

Kakashi brought her back onto his chest and quickly wrapped her in his arms. "Don't look so glum; you'll make me think I didn't do my job properly."

Naruto snickered and assured him that wasn't the case at all before looking up at his bruised face. "Please let me heal you now?"

"Nah, I've had worse, Naru-chan. Jiraiya-sama was really holding back," Kakashi knew that was true. He stroked his wife's side with his fingertips, up and down from below her arm to mid-thigh, and watched as goosebumps rose on her tan skin repeatedly in little waves that followed his attentive caresses. "Are you sure you're feeling alright? I still want you home and in bed today."

"Pervert," she joked before snuggling closer. "And no way; I'm fine! Plus I need to meet the team and go over some things with Shika." Kakashi responded with a disgruntled sound that was between a growl and a rumble. It was so stupidly attractive that she ducked her head into his chest to hear more, nestling further into him as much as she could. She was so into it that she didn't realize that she had started purring even when she heard him chuckle at her. "I don't have a fever anymore, and we really need to plan since the exam is starting tomorrow."

Naru wasn't sure whether or not Shika had been able to speak with Shino and Neji regarding how they were hoping to protect their teams, or how they wanted to distract dangerous teams from them, at least. If he hadn't, she had a lot to do.

Plus Naru really wanted to find Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari. And to see Shika's reaction to the beautiful Temari-hime! It'll be so kawaii, her inner fangirl cried. If everything went better this time, maybe she'd be able to get Temari's opinion on some fans or other weapons at some point during the exam. That would be awesome.

Seeing Gaara at the border as she did during her last mission was completely insane! For the first time, she considered what she was wearing at the time - or not wearing: that's a better way to put it - and felt heat rise to her cheeks. The thought of a guy friend seeing that much of her IN A DRESS was extremely embarrassing. She can't help but wonder what he was thinking, though...

Naru had felt Gaara close by, something that made her heart beat faster in anticipation of seeing him again, even though she was trying to kill his father. Oops. (His father, who hadn't yet been killed by Orochimaru this time. The one who made Gaara-kun's life a living hell before he was finally killed!) Meh, forget the oops.

...The father that wanted her to kill his youngest child! What a bastard!

An absolutely crushing incoming sand attack that felt like most of Suna's sand was about to smash into her made her realize that was it: she was going to die for the second time. There was no way she'd survive or escape it. Suddenly she found herself in her mindscape, in front of her mother. "Kaa-chan?"

Naruto wanted to cry, but she was in the heat of battle - er, being killed! Her mother looked at her sadly, then pushed her hand into her chest and pulled.

It had been so painful, whether she was in her mindscape or not. Her mother grimaced as she pulled harder and chains shot out. If she thought she'd been in pain before then, it was nothing compared to after. Naru cried out again as Kurama roared inside his cage and fell to her knees as she looked around in bewilderment at seeing the chains - her mother's chains - shooting out of her and weaving together in a protective barrier. She jumped at seeing someone inside the barrier with her but fell further as the pain and previous effort of fighting against the Kazekage's gold sand was taking its toll. She felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Interesting," Gaara said evenly as he looked at her chains, "but know that I'd never harm you, Namikaze-hime." Then it seemed like he stepped right through her barrier.

What the hell?! She had been fading in and out of consciousness at that point, but how did any of that work?!

It wasn't the first time she'd thought about that whole battle since it all went down, but Naruto still didn't get it. Hearing Kakashi let out a snore softly beside her meant that she finally had time to think about it all without being in a fevered haze. She could ask Kurama, but... Why not?

She knew why not! After what her mother did, she didn't want to step into her mindscape. It was stupid, as her mother wasn't there anymore - something that made her feel cold and desperately sad. She'd felt Kushina's warm chakra imprint leave her nearly as fast as it had appeared as soon as those chains erupted. At that moment, she had been immediately thrust back in between Gaara's and his father's sand, back in that alleyway.

Why did her mother do it?!

She guessed that since her father's chakra imprint had appeared - something that she didn't have the luxury of even remembering because of her stupid head injury - that her mother's was there inside of her again in this lifetime, too. After everything that happened with Kakashi... the fact that she was expected to have ch- (*gag*) offspring one day fairly soon, she really hoped that she'd have time to talk to her mother about all of it. To ask her questions that she'd never even thought of when she met her in her last life.

Did her mother think that she was going to die or something? Because apparently, she wasn't, as it was Gaara's sand dropping down around and nearly on top of her rather than Rasa's. Kami, it must be amazing to have that kind of control over that kind of devastation. The chains didn't even activate until he was right beside her - and why did Gaara have eyebrows now?

Not important, she reminded herself, cursing her Uzumaki genetics and their clan's inherent ADHD.

Although Gaara did look really good. Totally hot, in fact, which made her smile despite everything. I'm going to get him a girlfriend! Or a boyfriend! Whichever he wants! She fell back into her original thoughts and tried to hold off the matchmaker that had apparently been hiding inside of her all this time.

Why in the world did he call me "Namikaze-hime?" It's not like Gaara was surprised when her father was revealed to everyone out on the battlefield - actually, now that she reconsidered that, she was pretty sure that Gaara was somewhere else entirely, so... Maybe he saw the resemblance? Other people did, although most discounted it. Morons, (and that had included her.) But he usually called her "Uzumaki," and only on a few, special occasions called her "Naruto."

Never with honorifics, whether he was trying to kill or save her dumb ass. She really liked that about Gaara.

"Naruto."

The blonde closed her eyes and held Kakashi a little tighter while making sure not to wake him. I guess there's no choice, Naru thought grimly as she frowned and internally wrapped her arms around herself as she turned back to her mindscape. "Hey, Kurama. How's it going?"

The bijuu sighed unhappily, which blew the blonde's hair back. "Are you feeling better? We had quite the surprise."

Naruto laughed mournfully. "I guess we did, huh?" She walked between the bars of Kurama's cage and settled down between his mass of curled-up tails and paws. Looking up at the ragged seal on his cage door, she thought of her plan to rip it off if Orochimaru showed up and wondered if she should share that with her bijuu.

"You did well with the Kazekage, although it would have been better if you'd killed him. I find that I hate that sand spore; he deserved a fate worse than death." He looked down at his jinchuuriki's face and exhaled gloomily at seeing his kit so down. He figured his comment would have riled her up - either at him about hating or killing anyone that wasn't an Uchiha, or at the current Kazekage for being such an appallingly imbecilic bag of trash for expecting her to kill someone that was like her.

Naruto basked in the warmth that was Kakashi's arms and Kurama's fiery gigantic body heat but was still troubled. She had fallen asleep when Kurama finally spoke again.

"Shukaku was calm."

That woke Naruto up in a flash. "What? What do you mean: our Tanuki-Wookie was calm?!" She couldn't believe it. "You're talking about Shukaku and not Shikaku, my dad... Well, you know..." She never felt comfortable calling Shikamaru's dad her own, but it was the way she felt about him. The term of affection toward him did slip from her mouth sometimes. "...The 'Chief Deer Herder' as you like to call him."

"Tch. 'Deer Boss.' And yes, I am talking about my... least powerful sibling. Shukaku was, in fact, calm." He rolled his eyes at himself and didn't see Naruto do the same. Kurama didn't really mean it anymore - although what he said about his youngest brother was still technically true. Compared to his siblings, humans were all ants, however, so his brother's inherent weakness didn't bother him so much anymore.

Kurama supposed that he shouldn't be talking smack about any of his siblings, but Shukaku would always be fun to tease. Certainly more than that loudmouth monkey sibling of his; Son Goku's screeching gave him a headache. During the war when his brother had swallowed his host, it had been overwhelming. Screeching is probably his most powerful attack. "Say something."

Naruto groaned loudly and stretched before pacing around the cage, inside and out. "You're sure?" She only received a deadpan stare from her partner. "Gaara was calm, too - and now that makes more sense." Kurama's lips rather cutely - for a terrifying mountain-sized demon - curled up in what was clearly amusement.

"A shame that we may not need to inflict our plans upon the two of them."

Naruto laughed at that. They had spent a lot of time planning - with Shikamaru but mostly without him - about ways to "straighten Gaara and the tanuki out." She had written nearly an entire prank journal for it, plus there were the beatings she had hoped to give them.

- That had always worked in the past! Beat 'em then talk 'em to death: it was the Naruto recipe for success.

Kakashi poked her in the side. "What are you giggling about?"

"I didn't mean to wake you." She watched him stretch and internally groaned at seeing his rippling muscles flex. She was such a pervert for this man, but her body wouldn't quite keep up with her libido at least at this point when sex was so new. And hard: that wild man... She smiled at the thought and of the new aspect of their physical relationship. She hoped that in the future she'd be able to take advantage of a situation like she was in now: both of them naked and in bed. Well, if it was true like that drunken prostitute had told her in her first life when she was just five or six...

"...Just know that after ya first start out, it'll hurt less and less each time," the middle-aged woman who stunk of sake patted Naru's head and Naru reveled in the kind touch. It was something that she was so starved for, she didn't mind at all that she had no idea of what the woman was talking about after the older woman literally ran into the little girl. "As ya get more used to it, then it'll only be pleasure - then you can do it all you want," she cackled. "'Course, that's when they're done with ya, so that sucks, but fuck 'em! You can get yourself another man and many others after that with your looks, honey. You are gay, right?"

Naruto's brow began to twitch, realizing now that the woman must have thought she was a boy. Of course, she did: everyone did back then! Why would the hag think a child would even know their sexual orientation, considering most that young shouldn't know about sex at all? She hadn't known when she was that little or for a long time afterward which side she batted for, but she supposed that wasn't true for everyone.

Why am I remembering her of all people?!

"What are you thinking about, pretty girl?" Kakashi asked sweetly before turning his head away from her to yawn.

"An old prostitute."

"Of course." His little wife was crazy, but that was fine. Kakashi was a little crazy himself: his psych profiles proved it.

.

Kakashi looked up from his book and Tenzo's continued hushed but rambling complaints about him hiding his marriage - and the beating he'd allowed Jiraiya-sama to give him - when he noticed Teuchi gesturing at them to enter the back of his ramen bar from the adjacent alleyway hours later. The two Jonin entered the back room, glancing at each other in surprise and worry. Teuchi turned to them then even more surprisingly activated a seal.

"I'm glad I caught you two. There were some interesting folks in the restaurant today. Some Iwa nins were in a back booth when my favorite customer came in to devour half my stock." Teuchi cocked his head to the side a bit as Tenzo still looked baffled, but Kakashi groaned at the idea. "They'd stayed pretty quiet and were enjoying their meals, naturally, until one of them noticed Naruto-chan at the bar."

"Was there a fight?" Tenzo asked, finally understanding what was going on.

"No, not at all," Teuchi chuckled and crossed his arms, but remained serious. "A brunette - Jonin level - bought Naru-chan her 15th bowl of ramen and seemed... interested in her, which I knew was no good. The two talked for a bit and Naruto welcomed her to Konoha," Teuchi gave a bit of a nod to Kakashi's scoff at that, "and then Naruto went on her way. It was only afterward that... well, when I sensed you, I thought you should know."

Kakashi hadn't previously known that Teuchi-san had ever been a ninja, but there were many so-called "civilians" out there that provided information and thus had at least trained with shinobi to defend themselves in case their information-gathering was caught. He knew that other so-called civvies were actually retired ninjas hiding their skills, but he thought he knew most of those in both categories. Yet here was one more. "What happened?"

"Well, after the Iwa kunoichi stopped flirting with Naruto when our little blonde left, she went back to her table. Her compatriots were angry. They tried to keep it quiet, but I'm positive that they used Minato-sama's surname."

Kakashi pinched the bridge of his nose. "Of all the times for her not to use a henge."

"Bah! Over the last couple of months, she always drops it as soon as she's under our banner. Don't fault her for being herself," Teuchi scolded.

"You know what I mean," Kakashi said.

Teuchi did, but he still didn't like the Yondaime's daughter having to hide as she walked around the village that she was protecting from the fox.

.

Naruto stared at the Hokage and didn't understand at all. She'd accepted his heartfelt apology reluctantly, but what he eventually said after that almost made her stop quietly summoning a group of dual-mission, (& mission-ready) small toads to hide in his bookshelves. Considering he didn't even bother to look up at her from his paperwork as she bit her thumb and ran through hand seals, she continued.

He totally deserves what is coming. Bwahahahaha!

Hiruzen sighed and pulled out his pipe. "You don't remember. Of course." He added more tobacco and ignored his granddaughter's warning about how it was going to make him sick and give him even more liver spots. "I remember like it was yesterday. You were sitting at that end table, coloring what I later discovered was a fox - which was shocking, by the way," he said, pointing at the back corner of the room. "I think you must have been four or five, I suppose?" He took a long drag of his pipe. "A child surprised me when he ran in unannounced, but the boy didn't even look at me: he only had eyes for you. I thought it was perhaps love at first sight."

Naruto covered her face with her hands, feeling herself blush to her hairline even if she couldn't remember this. Hiruzen chuckled at her in that grandfatherly way of his. He was teasing her.

"The boy's uncle - and his father, the Kazekage - soon followed the little redhead in, apologizing profusely for the Kazekage's son's actions, but by then the two of you were coloring and talking quietly, ignoring everyone else completely. The only others you paid any attention to were the boy's siblings, who, like him, were accompanying the Kazekage on his trip here."

So that's how Gaara knew me. I just wish I could remember it: chibi-me must have been so excited to see him again!

"You really hit it off with the children, and I just wanted you to know... Naruto, this is important." Seeing that he had the little blonde's attention, he continued. "Rasa-sama took one look at you and knew that you were Minato's child. In recent years I have learned that his youngest, the very boy you became friends with that day, is a jinchuuriki - and an unstable one at that." The Sandaime didn't appreciate the way the kunoichi shrugged and scoffed.

"If anyone's unstable, it's that asshole Kazekage." Naru would bet a LOT of ryo that Rasa had sent out other assassination squads to take down his son and she had no qualms with Gaara defending himself.

Hiruzen sighed but agreed somewhat. Asking someone to assassinate one's own child couldn't be considered normal. "Language, Naruto-chan... And how was your fight with Kazekage-sama?" he asked with wary amusement.

"Meh," Naru said and wiggled her hand back and forth as if to say "so-so." She tapped her chin and thought about what to actually tell him or NOT to tell him. "I guess I did okay, considering he's the Kazekage. At least I totally got the jump on him." The blonde ignored the way her Jiji groaned. "Obviously I wasn't able to kill him for being such a bastard - something I think he deserves by the way." She turned away from the Hokage and turned some of the books on his shelves sideways for her small summons to have a better view, waiting to see if he'd reply. When he didn't, she was relieved and turned many of his books backward and mixed them up just because. "Anyway, he totally nicked me all over really good, but didn't get farther down than my skin. I put up a Fuuton barrier that shielded me."

"Hmm. Impressive, Naruto-chan."

"I don't know about that, old man. Politics being good or bad for it, I really was raging and barely even scratched the guy."

"No more attacking Kages, Naruto: that's an order." To the Sandaime, it looked like Naruto didn't plan to heed that order at all. She was such a brat. "Genma-kun reported that the Kazekage will have quite the scar from your attack."

"Good! Maybe that'll remind him not to mess with jinchuurikis," she said in finality. She was still a bit pissed that the Daimyo and Hokage had stuck their big noses into her private business. But she was also a little grateful because maybe that's what spurred Kakashi to take her seriously and to act. Jiji didn't need to know that, though. "So are the Sand Siblings here yet?"

Hiruzen nodded his head at his spunky granddaughter as he puffed out different shapes with the smoke from his pipe. The Sabaku siblings had arrived with their entourage late the previous night and had asked to greet him immediately upon checking in at the gate. When he received the message, he worried about what their intentions were, but the trio only apologized for their father's actions. It was a little bewildering, really. He would have previously considered that the Rasa Naruto met was a phony, but having heard from Kakashi that the man used gold sand - well, it had to be Rasa. Then, of course, the man's children came and confirmed it. "They're staying at the Dragon's Inn. They entered the village late last night, and I would imagine that they'll most likely be out to sightsee later today." He stopped his granddaughter from leaving to remind her of something serious.

"Naru-chan... I know that you are strong. Keeping you and your classmates at the Academy for a year longer than even the prior year's class had remained in their extended studies... remember that they are strong as well. And you could potentially be fighting another jinchuuriki in the exams." Naruto yawned but nodded her head.

She had that group training with her classmates and "The Rookies" were much stronger coming out of the Academy than they'd been in her first lifetime. Of course, they were all older now - almost the age at which she, Shikamaru, and Neji had died. What they lacked was experience, however, so Naru wasn't sure that the Hokage had done them any favors by keeping them in the village for so long. "Sumimasen. Did you just say that the class that graduated the year before us..."

"They graduated two years before you," Hiruzen corrected.

"No shit? See, this is the stuff I missed because I wasn't allowed to be in class," Naruto pouted.

"Indeed. And language, Naruto-chan," the Hokage scolded, knowing full well that Naruto would ignore his repeated scolding about her course language. "Neji-kun, Lee-kun, and Tenten-chan spent part of that first year as Genin doing D-ranks but also spent time at the Academy learning more theory, as well."

"Huh," Naruto said before offering her opinion on it. "I always thought that making Genin do D-ranks was dumb when Academy students can do them pretty easily, too."

"It was a trial," Hiruzen said as he sat back in his chair and looked toward his bookshelf for a moment. Naruto didn't need to know that the reason he kept the students back was that an entire year's graduating class had been killed within six months of graduating only a few years ago.

He could've sworn he'd heard a frog croaking but it turned out to be Naruto clearing her throat which was rather amusing. "We're looking at trying it again, but clients pay more for shinobi to complete tasks than they would for Academy students to do the same."

Naruto felt Danzo approaching and decided to jump out the window. Before she did, she said goodbye to her Jiji incredibly cheerfully and went on her way.

When Danzo got a face full of toads, he blamed Naruto immediately.

"Jiraiya-kun's the toad summoner, Danzo," Hiruzen couldn't help but grunt.

"Uzumaki holds the toad contract as well."

Hiruzen sighed and knew then that Danzo still had his agents spying on Naruto-chan: that's the only way he would know. "I think it's far past time we discuss your most recent actions that could have cost us another war and more immediately, one of our elite Jonin, or our jinchuuriki, old friend."

.

"I'm fine! Knock it off," Naruto said in a whiney voice to her slightly older brother who was turning her around to check her for wounds - or something... He was being ridiculous. Shikamaru finally gave up and began discussing everything he'd asked of Shino and Tenten, who was the designated captain of her team for the Chunin Selection Exam since Neji was already a Chunin!

She hadn't even noticed that he'd been wearing a vest. Had he been? Hyuugas are weird about what they wear. But anyway...

A Chunin! So not fair, Naruto thought. "Who's their third team member for the exams then?" You had to have a whole team to enter; of that, she was nearly positive.

"Troublesome. A weird guy named Katai. He's always got a book in his face; Tenten-chan said it's Icha-Icha he's constantly reading." He expected but didn't really appreciate, Naruto's bout of falling-all-over-herself laughter at that information.

"Oh gods," she said while choking out more giggles, "I bet he's ROOT! I knew that Sai had influenced a few of them - and of course, Kakashi persuaded Sai to read Icha-Icha, I guess. - I seriously think Sai's trying to emulate my awesome husband." Shikamaru was muttering "troublesome" about all of them. Naruto guessed that THAT was primarily because of Ino - and the romance between Shikamaru's teammate and Sai that hadn't even had a chance to begin.

"Sai's smut consumption might make Ino-chan see the light about that weirdo," Shikamaru said, for which he received a punch in the arm. "Ouch! Troublesome blonde!"

"Don't say that! Ino and Sai were so cute when they got together! They have to get together again, 'ttebayo! And anyway, you know how Ino always was or is fangirling on Sasuke. Being that way for so many years has to mean that she's a big pervert! And now with Icha-Icha in their lives? -It'll be beautiful!" Naruto felt a really large chakra signature headed their way. More than anything, she felt Kurama's attention to their surroundings rise.

"You're an idiot," Shikamaru said. "Hey! What the..."

"OOF." Naruto's face landed in the dirt. She turned around, now realizing why that chakra felt so familiar. "Fu?"

"Hai! Naruto-chan," the girl with the remarkable orange eyes cried. "Chomei and I have been wanting to meet you for so long!"