DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe. Were you thinking otherwise?😅

A/N: I wrote and rewrote this chapter a half dozen times. I finally got so frustrated, I decided to throw it out there so that I can move on with the story!

Thinking (+ flashbacks, Naruto speaking to Kurama, etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

Kakashi entered the small but ornate living quarters that had been assigned to them at the palace and froze. There was a male in his territory and he could also smell cigarette smoke. Creeping further in and ready to strike, he heard Naruto crying and froze.

"Dumbass! H-how can you s-say that?" his little wife sniffed from the other side of the bathroom door. "I practically - I boiled those people in my hands!"

There was a deep hum. "Kurama did that," the Nara kid's voice drawled.

Kakashi glared as he channeled chakra into his ears to better hear them. He was used to Naru's voice but NOT used to hearing her cry: he didn't like it at all. He also didn't like the fact that the Nara brat was in here. He believed there was nothing going on between the two of them now, but why the hell was he in his digs and IN THEIR BATHROOM?!

"Bullshit! I did it, not him! I remembered, Shika! I remembered and remember the whole thing - what I did before, what THEY did before, and that's why I… I relished the thought of killing them!"

"Che. I don't believe that for a second," Shikamaru responded testily. Naruto sounded like she was beside herself and Kakashi wasn't quite sure what to do.

Obtain intelligence first, he thought, going into mission mode.

"And honestly, aside from wanting you to stop crying and torturing yourself about it, I don't care," the Nara continued. His little wife squeaked before she broke out fresh tears again. "I popped that bitch's head off and I don't…"

"What if she's related to Sakura-chan?" Naruto said, a little hysterically. "I've been thinkin' about it and her hair, Shika: it was pink, not quite like Sakura-chan's but imagine mixin' it with her awful mothers! Tayuya's hair is just like..."

A thud interrupted what she was saying, and Kakashi almost swung open the door.

"Don't say that bitch's name: I'm not joking Naruto!"

Kakashi flinched back in disbelief as he heard a long series of quick and sloppy slaps - the kind children made when they were playing/only half-fighting. On the one hand, he wanted to strangle Nara Shikamaru for touching his woman, but on the other, he needed intelligence - and finally, he wasn't exactly shocked that the two were behaving like little kids.

"Don't call her that: she's dead, Shika!"

"Good riddance," Shikamaru said without remorse. "Do you remember what they did to us, Naruto? What condition Choji was left in? What happened to Neji and Kiba? If it hadn't been for Lee, you probably would've been killed: and don't think I've forgotten for a second what Sasuke did to you. You woulda fuckin' died and I'd have no problem killing him to stop that from happening again. You promised you would, too."

"I - I just… No, Shika. Please don't even… Don't even go there! Things are different now!"

"Are they?" the Nara asked coldly.

Silence followed, and Kakashi felt sick. Just what had happened to his little wife? Was it Gai's minion that had saved her or was it another Lee? And Sasuke… Just what did Sasuke do to her?!

Naruto choked out a bark of sad laughter. "Aside from me being a stone-cold killer?" she said softly, "Yeah, things are different, I think."

"Yeah, right," Shikamaru snarked. "Tell me this, Naruto: did you kill anyone during the invasion who hadn't separated my team's soul from their bodies?"

What the fuck? Kakashi wondered. Was that some kind of code?! Surely it wasn't a jutsu. Well, he'd speak to Asuma about it just to make sure…

"Aside from maybe Orochimaru? No, I don't think so. I did stab a bunch of people in the butt."

The Nara kid snorted then spoke. "Let me guess," he began.

"If they were going to be assholes, they deserved a second one, ya know," Naru laughed wetly before sniffing her tears away or so it sounded. "I only ever killed zombies before. I think… s-s-sensei may have even killed that thread guy - I couldn't even do that right or all the way." She said before softly blowing her nose.

"Well, congratulations: you're obviously much more talented now."

"Fuck you, Shikamaru," his little wife said without heat. "I killed that demon guy, too, this time around."

The Nara brat sighed out the word "troublesome" exactly the way his father always did. "The so-called 'Demon Brothers' were murderers and rapists, Naruto. You did the world a favor. Honestly, I'm a little worried about Sword and Ice surviving if they were partners with them. What kind of decent person would cooperate with a rapist, ne?"

Kakashi knew exactly who they were talking about this time, even if it was in code.

"Haku taught me an important lesson, Shika."

Oh, he did, did he? Kakashi thought, ready to stop this little rendezvous here and now.

"He sure did," Shikamaru reminded her. "Don't. Turn. Soft. Or you'll get Kidnapped - and potentially sold off to Who-the Fuck-Knows for ransom."

Kakashi hit the door hard as he bucked it open, finding the room filled with smoke as Naruto let out a very loud shriek. "Am I interrupting anything?" he said darkly, eyeing the Nara kid who only stared back at him as his wife tripped over the wastebasket. Kakashi caught her and gave her a very dry look. "Naruto?"

"I'm fine," Naruto said, plastering a smile on her previously shocked, swollen, and red face. "Shika just wanted to smoke! He's a clone, by the way."

"Good," Kakashi eye-smiled and used the kunai he was still holding to stab the kid.

"Hey!"

Kakashi crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back on the sink, wishing like hell Naruto hadn't let her asshole-brother smoke in their place. He accidentally coughed and she went into mother-hen mode. "Naruto, stop," he said, pulling her into the living room and closing that door behind him. His little lady was red and puffy-faced and apparently suffering more from the trauma of what she'd been through than he'd realized, but he, unfortunately, needed to speak to her about it later. Coughing again, he held his nose, his eyes watering up. "I can't do this right now."

"I'm sorry! I didn't realize the seal wasn't working!"

"Did it include a silencing feature? Don't answer that," he said quickly, knowing his "inner animal/dark side/'The Wolf'" (depending on who one asked) would probably go nuts if he found out his wife put a silencing seal in a room that wasn't for something mission-oriented or for them to make love in. "Madame Shijimi is expecting you, but I can't… My nose can't handle the smoke." He ruffled her hair and made a hasty retreat from the room before throwing up a genjutsu outside so that he could take off his mask, cough, and breathe more easily.

An hour later, he returned to the little hut after wandering around, checking out the Palace garden's recent changes, wondering where his wife was. He opened the door and found Naruto standing in a slip with her blood in fuuinjutsu all over the walls. "Naru-chan," he sighed in exasperation. He grabbed her when she swayed and noticed that some of her clones who were tirelessly cleaning the place - aside from the blood all over the walls - were a little pale, too. The smell of smoke was almost completely gone, however, even before Naruto sent out a giant surge of chakra.

The blood shimmered and disappeared along with the rest of her clones. The rest of the smoke's smell was suddenly gone, too. "Very impressive, Naru-chan, but…"

Unfortunately, Naruto had passed out cold in his arms.

"Yare yare, Naru-chan. What am I going to do with you?" He put her to bed, smiling when she snuggled into his hand. He knew that Naruto's godmother would be waiting for her, but decided that she could wait a few more minutes to find out that Naruto would be late. Really late. He took off his weapons and snuggled up against her, spooning her tightly while she recovered and fed her his chakra.

Hopefully, he wouldn't be blamed for his habits rubbing off on her.

.

So far Minato and Shisui had taken out three of Danzo's bases but still hadn't found the man himself.

While his daughter might prefer to talk her enemies to death or preferably to a change of heart, Minato did not. The ROOT nins they'd found had exactly one chance to change their allegiances to him and most did. The others? He slew or crushed them within their bases before moving on to the next.

Now they were traveling with a potentially brainwashed Sakura whom Minato chose to save despite her questionable loyalties since she'd once been close to Naruto. The teen was currently complying with his orders, but neither he nor Shisui trusted her not to kill them in their sleep or give them misinformation. So far, the pinkette had shown very little knowledge of iryo-ninjutsu which was simply a terrible waste based on what Minato had seen in his past reanimated life.

Part of the teen's taijutsu was almost as destructive as he remembered, although it was different and less speedy now. Sakura demonstrated that she could punch her way through thick trees already, although she did it by hardening her body with rock. Minato wished that he could simply order her back to Konoha and Tsunade-hime for further training, but needed to ensure she wouldn't turn traitor.

Stopping by a stream so they could rest, Minato decided to explore her loyalties and relationships. "Tell me, Sakura-san, what was your life like before Danzo?"

Sakura almost winced at the reminder. She hated Danzo, but she was also very afraid of him and his trainers. "Although it matters little, my parents are civilians, Yondaime-sama. I attended the Ninja Academy from the ages of 6 through 16 and was assigned to a six-man team under Tenzo-sensei, codename Yamato, registration number 010992, and captain Hatake Kakashi, codename Inu, registration number 009720. My name was Haruno Sakura, ninja registration number 012601, and am presently codenamed Petals," she continued, gesturing to the pink petaled but otherwise blank mask on her hip. "My Genin teammates were codename Sai, actual name unknown, registration number 012420, Uchiha Sasuke, registration number 012606, and the Kyuubi jinchuuriki, Hatake nee Uzumaki-Namikaze Naruto, registration number 012607."

Minato nodded at her but crossed his arms over his chest as Shisui trapped the perimeter. "Why do you say it matters little that your parents are civilians? Recently Konoha suffered a serious attack and invasion," he exaggerated only somewhat. "Aren't you worried about them?" The way that Sakura's hands continued to fist repeatedly before she answered told him that Danzo had really done a number on the poor girl.

Sakura spoke with determination. "A ninja must not show emotion." She didn't understand why Yondaime-sama groaned then laughed bitterly at her words.

"Oh, man! I had to deal with this with one of my own many years ago," he said, reminded of a young Kakashi's obsession with shinobi rules after his father's death.

The Sakura he remembered was a caring if rather violently tempered girl, and he remembered wondering back in the Fourth Shinobi War if Naruto's kunoichi teammate might have some Uzumaki in her. A single Uzumaki grandparent combined with a Yamanaka or other light blonde might also explain her incredibly odd pink hair. "Your extended family is civilian?"

"Hai!"

"Interesting," he replied blandly. Minato then bent down, placing his fingers to the ground as Sakura watched curiously. "This is a sensing technique, Sakura-san."

Sakura nodded. "Danzo-sama said that you were - are - an excellent sensor type."

"He talks about me, does he?" Minato asked grimly, really wanting to slice the old fart into pieces.

"All the time," Shisui said cheerfully, nearly skipping back over to them before he got the nod from his superior. He threw down some old wood and used a fire jutsu to light it aflame. "Or he used to anyway. The mummy, as Naru-chan always called him," he began, trying to ignore the way Sakura gasped and looked around, probably trembling, "was always'Yondaime-sama's sacrifice' this; 'Yondaime-sama's sacrifice' that," he said, mimicking Danzo's voice mockingly. "It's no wonder so many ROOT nins are leaving him without concern to follow you; I bet the old man didn't count on that when he was talking you up," he chuckled darkly.

"Huh," Minato said absently before leaning against a tree. He needed to find someone to lead all of these ROOT nins that he had temporarily imprisoned in a (now barrier-enclosed) holding cell that was used for the same by Danzo before Minato allowed any of them into the general ANBU or shinobi ranks.

"I'd like to know why you spent 10 years at the Academy. You're obviously a smart young woman. I'd also like to know your opinion of your former sensei and captain", the Yondaime said.

Indeed, Kakashi and this Tenzo person were his first choices to lead the new ROOT. Shisui would've been ideal, but he'd already spent too much time in the dark. From dealing with the Uchiha on this mission, he also thought that Shisui might deny his request or order, even though he was Hokage.

Sakura swallowed hard, feeling the seal on her tongue tickling her. The sensation wasn't as strong as it usually was, which most likely meant that she was a greater distance away from Danzo than she had been: thank Kami. It had been terrible, nearly always being required to remain close to the man's side. "Danzo-sama said that the Academy curriculum was wrongly extended after the loss of all newly-promoted Genin several years ago. Those graduating in what would have once been the year before mine took missions on a trial basis for over a year or were entered into the Genin reserves. Sandaime-sama is said to have wished for Genin to graduate as adults."

Minato ran his hand through his thick unruly locks. "Well, I can't blame him for that. And your superiors in the general ranks, Genin?"

Sakura snapped to a kneeling position, her head facing toward the floor, which seemed to make the man quite uncomfortable. She wasn't a sensor, but she could feel his discomfort. "My superiors were adequate."

Yondaime-sama began chuckling. He was a very strange man. …Kinda like Naruto but also not.

"'Adequate:' Kakashi would just love to hear that description of him," Minato drawled in a low voice to himself. "What do you think of Tenzo and Kakashi, Uchiha-san?"

Shisui hummed before answering. "They're both excellent shinobi. And from what I saw - and what Sasuke-kun told me - both Tenzo and Hatake were working their team relentlessly. Team 7 was required to enter the Chunin exams less than two months out of the Academy, so it makes sense that they would, especially as Iwa agreed to attend," he said before rubbing around his eye socket. The area was bothering him and he couldn't help but wonder if Danzo was doing something obnoxious with his eyeball right now.

Sakura's mouth moved before she realized she gave away possibly classified information that she'd learned from Danzo. "Uchiha and Sai-kun were Hatake-hime's bodyguards for the exam." She grabbed her mouth when the tickling turned to pain, then deeply regretted openly reacting, waiting to be punished. When punishment didn't come, she opened her eyes and blanked her face. Yondaime-sama and Uchiha-san were looking at her with concern. She decided to be bold to thank them for their kindness. "I was traded by my uncle to our leader for political power on the council."

The pain that followed her words made her lose consciousness.

"She's in pain even now," Shisui said, his single Sharingan turning lazily as he observed the unconscious young woman's chakra.

Minato approached her and forcibly opened Sakura's mouth. "If I could just get that seal off."

"I've heard Naruto can do it," Shisui said, his once handsome scarred face turning up into a smirk at the Yondaime's mouth falling open in disbelief. "She channels chakra into the seal and while it doesn't take the seal off, she renders the curse mark useless to Danzo. Really, it's better that it stays on to fool that old goat."

The cursed seal on Shisui's tongue was a prototype that he believed was never used again. His unique seal allowed him to "maintain his personality" and as long as he didn't say Danzo's name, he was usually fine.

Or maybe it went inactive after Danzo thought a ROOT nin dead. But he really doubted that. Danzo was nothing if not careful.

And a total bastard.

"Incredible," Minato breathed, remembering that he didn't think Naruto knew anything about seals when he met her in his reanimated form a lifetime ago: one of the many things he deeply regretted. "Maa, I suppose that's a silly thing to say! My girl's an Uzumaki, after all. …And a Senju," he commented more to himself, pulling a face. "Kami, I still can't get over that," he said, regarding his previously unknown biological parentage. "Can you put a genjutsu on her to ease her pain?"

"Can't you?" Shisui asked, a little defiantly.

"Brat," he chided the physically similarly aged shinobi. "I just want to see if you can do it," he lied. In fact, Minato was having a little trouble with laying down effective genjutsus now that he was fully alive with almost half of the most powerful chakra monster in his gut. Thankfully, most of his other abilities came relatively easy to him. Most of his techniques had been designed with conserving chakra at the forefront of his mind.

Seeing Sakura's body relax, he breathed a sigh of relief, then couldn't help himself but ask Shisui more about his daughter. "You said Naruto saved your life?"

"Hai," Shisui drawled as he sat down, "and she doesn't remember doing it at all," he said, shaking his head as he stared into the fire. He and Yondaime-sama had already discussed Naru's memories or mind still being sealed as well as a few things from her childhood when he was her main guard. Yondaime-sama wanted to examine Naruto's seals but was also refusing to be near her for some reason.

Shisui wondered if it was because they were both jinchuurikis.

Oh, Shisui didn't tell his Kage that he knew, but how could he not? Minato-sama's two chakra sources burned almost too brightly to his senses and Sharingan, although, unlike Naruto, Yondaime-sama's chakra coils barely seemed to keep up with all of that rampaging chakra.

"You really cared about her," Minato said, so grateful to the young Uchiha that it hurt.

"Yeah. I still do! I mean, how could I not? She was such a STINKER, Yondaime-sama: no offense!"

"None taken."

"Anyways," Shisui said after ensuring the Haruno girl was still asleep, "Lord Fuckleroy had absconded with my Sharingan and I approached my cousin, intending to die and have him keep my other eye for safekeeping."

Yondaime-sama was gaping at him since he hadn't mentioned that part of his near-death experience before, but it was the truth.

"Out of the blue - or maybe that was because I was poisoned and nearly blind, a yellow and orange streak came into my vision and hit me like a boulder, making me crash to the ground. Itachi said Naruto pulled the poison from my system before trying to heal my eye?" he asked more than said, still unsure about that part. "I do remember her eyes turning red while she seemed to literally wrestle for control and curse herself. Itachi had to get involved."

Minato frowned, but wondered… He remembered Naruto replacing Kakashi's stolen eye during the war and wondered if she still maintained the ability to do such a wondrous thing.

A low, familiar voice inside his head surprised him. "I would NEVER allow her to replace a damnable Sharingan. And neither would my other half."

"I suppose that makes sense, Kurama-sama," Minato said, bowing to the beast that kept kicking him out of his mindscape. "It's good to see you again, and thank you for your help."

"Your sentiments are not returned," the Kyuubi said before flinging a tail at him which threw him out of their shared space again.

Kami, he really needed to sweet-talk that fox, didn't he?!

Minato cleared his throat, anxious about the time he may have spent "away" from Shisui when he was with the fox. "And then she and Itachi-kun hid you."

"Hai. It was almost as if she'd planned it. …She did a lot of things as if she had foreknowledge."

Yondaime-sama turned away from him, saying he'd take first watch, but Shisui wondered about the smirk that grew on the young Kage's face.

.

Naruto knew that she had been lucky beyond reason. Not only did she have a chance at another life after death as a failure, but she also had a wonderful life this time. She was lucky enough - perhaps - not to remember her first lonely years being back in the past, and then she'd been taken in by a wonderful family. And clan! They were people who not only kept her a secret, but loved, cared for, and disciplined her as if she was one of their own. She was not just a lonely orphaned jinchuuriki now; she was a daughter, sister, friend, and had a husband and lover - whether or not he loved her back.

What an emo I am about him, she thought. Brooding is Sasuke's thing; not mine.

It seemed like lately, that was becoming a mantra for her.

And just like Kurama, I'm not a monster.

Her godmother was a trip but hadn't had as much time for her as she and Lady Shijimi had hoped. As the first wife (bleh: sharing was SO not caring in such a situation, Naruto thought) to the Fire Daimyo, Masako-sama had primary duties as the head of the man's personal affairs although she enjoyed advising him professionally more - something that he thankfully allowed.

Naruto's appearance last night had apparently caused a "slight uproar in the court, but don't you worry about them, Naru-chan!" Masako had gone on to assure Naruto that the various lords and ladies that were blood-related to the Daimyo would cool their jets once she threatened them privately, but it still made Naruto feel bad that she was causing the older woman more work or stress.

Sadly, Masako-sama had only been able to tell Naruto a lot she didn't know about Mito-sama (her great-great-grandmother, weirdly enough) and highlights of her mother's kunoichi career before she had to attend to the voices subtly threatening both of them.

Which was ridiculous! Naruto didn't give a shit if they thought she really wasn't a princess since she wasn't related to the Daimyo! Hell, she didn't think she was a princess, either! Sadly, she didn't get a chance to tell them all that since she'd been "excused."

The thing that was bothering her now was the way she saw Kakashi posturing as he knelt before the Daimyo, speaking seriously and protected by a silencing and genjutsu seal. It seemed to Naruto that Kakashi had a request for the Daimyo, and that scared her. Was he requesting an annulment to their marriage?

"Stop thinking so hard: you are giving me a headache!"

"Sorr-ry," Naru snarked sarcastically, seriously considering flipping the fox off as she did so.

"You worry too much," Kurama assured her: she really was giving him a headache whether she believed him or not. Why humans were so stupid when those like Naruto and her canine husband could sniff out the truth was beyond him. "I thought you promised not to wallow in self-doubt and misery."

"Yeah."

Kurama rolled his eyes in dismay. When it came to that Ningen, Naruto was a fool.

"I just want to stay married to him," she admitted, puzzling her orange partner. "I don't know what the Daimyo will say - the man's weird, multi-married, and kinda creepy - but OH," she exclaimed, punching a fist into her other hand. "I'll seduce him!"

"Ye-ah," Kurama snarked unhappily, "like you really need to do that." It was clear to him that the Hatake brat was completely smitten with his vessel, as he should be - not that he'd be admitting that any time soon.

Or ever.

"You don't think I can do it? That I can seduce him into staying with me?"

"I - ugh! I never… Come back here, you brat!" It was too late. Naruto had already literally run off both from her mindscape and the Ningen across the room, not realizing that her abrupt disappearance from the court had caused her canine-human hybrid of a husband to be concerned.

What a moron.

The blonde tried to find a good pose or posture that would look appetizing or seductive or something, and face-planted, going totally limp on top of the bed, wishing so much that she had an innate clue rather than knowledge that mainly came from Jiraiya's damn books.

Naruto was wearing most of something black and lacy that she figured Kakashi bought her because she found it in her pack. Did she look like an idiot? She looked down at the black garters and hose, readjusting them and feeling a little (make that a LOT) embarrassed. The door opened in the other room and she froze. She heard her husband - hopefully he was still her husband: she wasn't sure if the Daimyo could just annul their marriage that fast - take off his sandals and waited with bated breath.

"Naru- …Oh, Kami," Kakashi finished in a throaty gasp. Having taken off his hitai-ate, he stared at her with both eyes open, his Sharingan spinning, and his little wife smiled up at him, looking like a gorgeous but somehow innocent, meant-for-one-man-only porn star.

Naruto had frozen, feeling way too exposed - what was I thinking?! - up on her elbows as she began to push herself back in the bed like a cat. She felt like prey and that was not her thing.

"Don't move," Kakashi ordered, his thoughts otherwise blurring. He had a mission to get to but… He was always late, wasn't he?

Was he? He couldn't remember right now. What had he been doing..? He cleared his throat and looked away from the vision in front of him.

He'd been talking to the Daimyo about the "Kazekage seduction mission" Naruto had been given, requesting that she never be forced into anything like that ever again. It was within his right as a clan head, and the Daimyo hadn't, at first, known what he was talking about. The Daimyo had never authorized that mission, he said, and Kakashi guessed that Danzo might be behind it.

- That Danzo possibly forged the Daimyo's signature and crest. …Although it could have been someone else.

Someone he vowed to find and end!

Both men had been angry that Hiruzen simply signed off on the mission that Daimyo-sama had no knowledge of: a mission that involved putting the man's favorite wife's (then secretly alive) goddaughter in so much danger.

"Kash?" his mostly naked wife asked, grabbing his full attention again.

Kakashi stepped forward, tossing his gloves aside and touching his wife hesitantly as he ran his fingers down her all but bare back. Grabbing the flesh of her uncovered ass, he groaned and sat down.

Gods, this woman was going to be the death of him! He, literally, couldn't remember what he was going to do when he came here! That was not like him at all.

"Naru-chan," he whispered into her ear, his heart accelerating as he pulled at her and smoothed her flesh, "what do you think you are doing?"

"Nothing," she lied, making him release a chuckle as he continued re-memorizing her curves with his hand and borrowed Sharingan. He moved to the end of the bed and pulled her chin up and ran his fingers up and down her neck and chest. Naruto lifted her head and leaned back so he could touch more of her breasts that were spread underneath her.

So shameless...

"You're just laying around in the cupless bra and garters I bought you," he quietly said, pulling down his mask to bite at her shoulder, "and no panties."

"Should I go put them on?" she asked with big eyes. She'd thought they looked stupid and were kinda against her whole plan here. Kakashi let out a shaky chuckle. She gritted her teeth when he ran both his hands under her, rolling her nipples with his long, calloused fingers.

Here it was: her golden opportunity. She was going to seduce him! As long as she could think straight, she could do it!

"I'll do anything you want me to," she said, having absolutely no idea of how crazy she was making her husband with her big blue eyes, the way she licked her lips, and moved little by little to grant him more access to her body. "Do you have anything you want me to do, Kakashi?"

Kakashi's mouth had gone dry. He dropped his vest and ran his hand down the crack of her ass, loving how she moved her legs even farther apart for him. Exploring her silken folds, he snarled when she began moving against his hand. "Wanton minx," he mumbled before beginning to pull off his shirt. "Yeah, Naruto. I've got a lot - a LOT - of ideas for what I want to do with you."

"That's good," she breathed with a little whine as he continued petting her.

"Fuck," he said between gritted teeth. "You're a little slut for my dick, aren't you, baby?"

Naruto smiled wickedly before ducking her head. "Maybe?"

If anyone else had said that to her, she would've punched their face off. But this was dirty talk, wasn't it?! She suppressed a little squeal but wasn't sure how to proceed. What if he didn't want her to be a slut? Oh man, it was so complicated… She shrieked when he jerked her hips up and let out a choked breath when she felt him move against her, realizing that she must have been considering what to do or say for a little while. Going with the flow, she reached back to touch him, and Kakashi smacked her ass, then began smacking her with his cock.

"Bad girl!"

She let out a squeak and bit her lip. "Well, what would you have me…"

"Silence," Kakashi commanded. "No words from you, Naru-chan," he ordered, pushing his cock back and forth along her folds as his little wife became wetter and wetter. She was moving against him and the sight of her ass up like this, presenting herself to him and moving against him, his clan crest glowing on her back now was driving him insane. He was still able to grit out, "Nod if you understand. Your arms and legs stay where they are until I say otherwise. Do you understand?"

She nodded.

"This is going to be quick and rough," he began to explain, "and it's all your fault. I came here to merely talk to you, but now you're in trouble. I'm going to fuck you, then go on my mission. When we're back in Konoha, you owe me for this alright? You never go back on your word, correct?"

"Yeah," she agreed, then got cock-spanked again.

"Silence. I have at least a dozen fun things I can think of doing to you off the top of my head and will have more planned by the time I next see you. Now," he said as he pulled her back into his lap. "You're going to ride me, reverse-cowgirl, and you're only allowed to howl or say absolutely filthy things." He bit her while his hands worked to get her ready for him. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes... Master!"

"Oh fuck," he wailed in a cracked high-pitched surprise, before smacking her ass when Naruto cracked up laughing.

"Bad girl!"

He'd been quick, but he'd been thorough. Naruto was fast asleep and covered with new marks as he put on his clothes. A knock on his door came just as he was putting on his sandals.

"Tenzo? What the fuck do you want? I didn't think you'd be…"

"Sen-paiii," Tenzo whined like a child, his face red as he stared at the ground. "I've been waiting," he continued, rubbing the bridge of his nose under his hitai-hate before hissing in a whisper, "for you to finish!"

"Oh." The captain guessed that meant he and his wife were being obnoxiously loud.

Fair enough.

Kakashi shut the door in his face and went back to Naruto. He kissed the top of her head and summoned two of his hounds. He then covered her up, wincing when he saw his handprints bruising the waist and hips of her nearly flawless skin.

"Geez! It smells like sex in here, Boss," Bisuke said as he covered his nose with both front paws.

"Mating leads to puppies," Pakkun reminded him sagely.

Kakashi scratched the pug's head back and forth harder for that comment as Bisuke wagged his tail at the reminder. He gave his youngest a few pats, too. "Naru's… tired," he said, deciding that was a good word for it as he grabbed his knapsack. There was no time to bandage his legs, and they'd made a mess of the Jonin pants he'd left on earlier. " I don't want to wake her up," he explained to his puppy-eager ninken. "Keep an eye on her and don't leave her, alright?"

"Hai!"

It was less than a half-hour later that Kakashi met up with the remainder of his (waiting) team that was escorting some more troublesome Iwa nins back to the border. "Yo!" Kakashi said happily, "How ya doin', Tsuchikage-sama?"

Onoki looked at the Copy Nin's goofily happy masked face and incredibly relaxed stature as if he'd lost his mind. So did the rest of their traveling party - on both sides! "Let's just go," he grumbled morosely.

Naruto woke up to Pakkun-breath. "Ugh," she groaned, quickly pulling her face away from the ninken. "What did that man do to me?" she asked as she tried to move and found herself very sore.

"You were making puppies with Boss," Pakkun said as if that was a normal thing to say. Then again, he was a talking dog with a bit of a superiority complex.

"No, no, no," Naru began to explain, then Big Fangs interrupted her.

"You need to be more careful about NOT making puppies! It's NOT my job to monitor your… human cycles," Kurama said with revulsion.

"Sorry: you're right. You're right! I'm good, though, correct?"

"Who knows," Kurama said dismissively. She was, but something/someone had to break her of these bad habits. And yech: the things he'd seen today! Shukaku might find it interesting and want to watch them, but Kurama did not!

"I did it, though! You didn't think I could seduce him, and I did! ...I think."

"Dimwit," he sneered, unimpressed. "I don't think that was a seduction." Dog Boy and most humans would take any pleasure they could get; it's not like the female had to do anything in the first place to get the wolf to succumb to her (lack of) charm. More importantly, "you two are exchanging more than repulsive fluids each time. You realize what you're doing, don't you? You two are sharing and swapping chakra!"

"I know! It's nice, right?" Naruto said dreamily, ignoring Kurama's thrashing tails, before returning to the reality around her.

"No puppies now, Pakkun," Naruto whispered, yawning and pulling the pug closer to her. Bisuke curled up beside her, too, mentioning that she stank like Kakashi, but the blonde could barely move. "I'll take a shower in a bit, as soon as I can stand, okay?"

.

Naruto had been escorted back to Konoha by Kakashi's two ninken and four members of the Guardian 12, which was embarrassing as all hell and made her realize just how badly she needed to learn the Hiraishin so she could avoid this nonsense.

She was not some helpless princess, nor was she a fucking monster who had to be caged and monitored!

Kami, she was mad!

Making it worse was that when she finally got back to the gates of Konoha, she was escorted to her home's sealed border, making her want to wail on Ibiki and Kotetsu who were the ones to do it. Didn't that scarred-up interrogating bastard have better things to do?! Didn't Kotetsu need to remain to guard the village and the man who was reportedly his not-so-secret on-again, off-again lover?!

"You are to remain here until you get a mission," the Torture guy said, gesturing toward the estate.

"That's bullshit and you know it, Ibiki-san!"

Naruto knew she had little choice, though - as she was now a Chunin and thus "responsible" - and stomped back to her house, glad to be away from them and made a few more clones to help her get the place in shape again. She spent the evening watering and talking to her garden, glad that her plants agreed with her that all this was a bunch of crap before she trained.

Deciding that her clones weren't necessarily her when she henged them, because gosh: they would do stuff that she'd NEVER do - as if she laughed, thinking that was hilarious - she sent out a few dozen of them to go spy on Konoha and shop for her.

Kakashi was pretty sure that she was here (his wife's chakra was spread throughout all the busiest areas of the village,) but because of the fuuinjutsu over their home - although it doesn't quite feel like home anymore since it technically belongs to Yondaime-sama - and Yondaime-sama, aka Minato-sensei, is alive and even keyed into that home…. Kakashi went slack as he leaned against the wall: his thoughts were spiraling again. Sensei should be back any time now. He just needed to stop and breathe.

And move Naruto into his still-empty Jonin barracks apartment. He could seal it up and make sure that sensei couldn't get in.

"Is Naruto back yet?" he asked Tsunade in a bored voice once he was alone with the woman behind the Hokage's desk who thankfully, wasn't his sensei. Yes, Kakashi was concerned about the now-alive Yondaime and his short-term mission involving Danzo, but he also wasn't quite sure that Minato-sensei wouldn't kill him for marrying Naru-chan whenever the mood hit him.

And Kakashi knew his sensei would kill him if he ever found out what he'd only recently been doing and demanding of his daughter. ...Who was his now, not Minato-sensei's, he reminded himself.

He still felt bad that he'd bruised his little wife.

Fuck. They had been using chakra while going at it, hadn't they? That was pretty fun and something fairly new that he really had thought was a myth.

Tsunade snapped her fingers in front of the Copy Nin's eye, wondering what was going on in his supposedly-brilliant head and underneath that mask of his. Hatake Sakumo had been handsome, and Kakashi had been a cute toddler: was he a good-looking man? For her granddaughter, she hoped that he was because right now he looked like a half-asleep cycloptic dumbass.

"Oi, Kakashi-kun: you in there?" she asked, snapping again.

"Hai, Tsunade-hime. Gomen ne."

"Good! You've got a mission," she said, throwing her orders at him with a little chakra since he groaned like a little bitch regarding the news. He was a shinobi, for fuck's sake. "Grow up! There's a kunoichi from the Lock Village: a village we have little to no knowledge of. We don't even have much intelligence on the Land of Keys. Your job is to acquire intelligence."

"Maa, Tsunade-hime! Why do I have to do this?" he nearly whined on purpose. "It sounds like a B-ranked mission at best." He wanted to get back to Naruto so that they could talk about what he'd overheard between her and her brother. Kakashi wanted to make it clear to her that HE was here for her, and that she didn't need to have secret conversations with a non-related brother who was a total brat. And he smoked!

His nose was really sensitive.

Tsunade slammed down her empty glass and threw one of her long ponytails behind her. "The kunoichi, a woman who goes by 'Hanare,' says she knows you: so it's your mission. Now do as you're told!"

Kakashi looked at the picture of the kunoichi and had no recollection of ever meeting her. "You sure she doesn't want to kill me?"

"I don't know," Tsunade shrugged, going back to her plans for the hospital. "It's your job to find that out and more!"

"Hai, Tsunade-hime," he said, jumping out the window just to tick her off. There was just something about Tsunade that had always made him want to act out. Actually, there was something about any degree of authority that made him want to do so.

He also had a gut feeling that this mission was going to be highly problematic.

But first, he needed to go take a shower… Deciding that he didn't want Minato-sensei to find him stripped bare even alone in the shower of his home, he took to the rooftops, heading for his old apartment.