Initially, being grounded felt right to Monarch, it was a chance to rest and to heal. The peace it provided had been reassuring, however boredom had begun to creep in. While his hands shook, he yearned to get back in the pilot's seat. To be making changes, course corrections, soaring through the clouds, and most importantly, continuing the struggle against the Federation. However, he was grounded, trapped in an old tunnel while the fiery orange maelstrom continued to rage, driving peace further from his grasp. It made him feel useless, almost painfully so, but as it was with most of the issues in his life, Robin was there to save the day.
"You know, with both of us stuck on the ground… there is one thing that we could do."
He hadn't known exactly what she was planning as she led him across the base. Following Robin, he found a spark of excitement within him, and he treasured it. Eventually, they reached the large tunnel in the Highway where all of the fixed-wing combat aircraft were stored. There was a decent mix of mercenary-owned and Cascadian planes all packed into the precious shelter offered by the tunnel, along with a few of his own, or at least, planes that had formerly been his. At a glance, he only spotted his F/S-15, which was one of only two planes that he still owned. As he and Robin walked past, he felt a pang of sadness at the damage that the planes had suffered.
Or at least, what's left of it. Monarch shook his head, he had to focus, for Robin's sake.
Most of his planes had been lost during the onset of the Second Calamity and the subsequent destruction of Rowsdower Air Force Base, and to say he mourned them would be an understatement. It wasn't just a matter of losing a financial investment for him, flying was more than an occupation to him, it was a way of life, something that he held a passionate love for. Nothing would break that passion, not even Crimson. At the thought of the rogue pilot, Monarch felt a shudder pass through him. Robin turned to him as they walked and grasped his hand, he found himself again and tried his best to focus on moving, deeper into the hanger away from the storm of hellfire that raged outside.
With the Cascadian Air Force suffering disastrous casualties after the Second Calamity, Monarch had made the difficult, but ultimately correct decision to officially donate most of his aircraft to the Cascadian Pilots for use during the rest of the war. He wasn't sure how many of them were still flying, but if Stardust was to be believed, Monarch's planes had been put to very good use. Despite not flying them himself, he found some small sense of comfort that they could still be of some help.
After a long, quiet walk, he and Robin finally reached their destination. At the very back of the row of aircraft was the plane that he had used to defeat Crimson One, his and Robin's F/D-14, the Tomcat. In truth, he had been subconsciously avoiding this moment, knowing what he would find when he came to examine the finest plane that he'd ever flown.
The battle with the rogue Federation Pilot had clearly taken its toll on the Tomcat. There were dents and cuts where shrapnel had struck across the entire aircraft, burn marks from latent cordium in the air, and a hole in the left wing from a thirty-millimeter explosive round, no doubt shot from the cannons of the Project Wingman. There was also a sizable chunk of metal torn from the starboard vertical stabilizer, although what exactly had dealt such a hit, he wasn't certain. While the sight itself was distressing, it inspired darker thoughts about his failings as both a pilot, and as a flight leader.
All of that was just what he could see on the surface, he didn't even want to think about everything else. He knew from memory that the flare pods were jammed, and the electronics had been acting very strangely by the time that he had landed back at the highway. The Tomcat had given her all for the fight with Crimson One. In that sacrifice, he felt the pain she exuded, there was a crash from behind him followed by rather foul language. He turned and witnessed the sight of Robin dragging a trolley loaded with parts and notebooks over, a sheet of metal hanging precariously on the top, perhaps there was hope yet that the Tomcat would fly again.
Robin looked at the plane and shook her head in head in dismay, before turning to him with a look of utter disbelief. "I don't know how the hell you killed that asshole with that many holes in our plane."
Monarch sheepishly shrugged. "Well, after you passed out, I got… angry."
'Angry' didn't describe the half of it, what little he remembered of the battle was seen through a haze of red, and it hadn't been from the geothermal storms. While he was still mortified that Robin had lost consciousness and gotten hurt in the way that she had, he was at the very least glad that she hadn't been around to witness just how badly he'd lost his cool. If he hadn't, perhaps she wouldn't have been unconscious for so long.
Her gaze softened for a moment, before she offered him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. He hadn't even noticed that he'd started to shake until the tremors stopped. "It's alright, I- we're safe now… but it looks like we've got a lot of work to do."
He took one more long look at her, before nodding, and the two of them set to work on fixing their fighter.
The first step was assessing the damage, which to Monarch's relief, wasn't much worse than he had expected. Even so, the thing was barely airworthy by the time that he'd landed, and it was immediately apparent that it was going to be quite a bit of time before the Tomcat flew again.
But that's okay, we have time. Monarch thought to himself as he noted down yet another bit of shrapnel damage that would need to be repaired on his clipboard.
He and Robin were interrupted as a familiar voice spoke up from behind them. "Shouldn't you two be resting?"
They both turned to see Stardust who, aside from a few visible burn marks, looked like he was doing fairly well. Monarch had been relieved to hear that Stardust had survived the Presidia Disaster, although he hadn't expected to see the Cascadian Pilot still stationed at the Highway.
Robin scoffed and got back to work immediately. "Do you really think I can rest knowing that my baby looks like this?"
"Got bored, had to do something." Monarch replied, probably a little more dryly than he had intended, but Stardust didn't seem to mind.
"So I see." Stardust said, looking over the plane himself with a look of surprise in his eye. "From what your report said about the Project Wingman, and what little I got to see, I'm amazed you were able to take it down in this thing."
Prez grumbled something very foul, either at Stardust for his somewhat disparaging comment, or the fact that she'd just got her thumb caught in a maintenance hatch.
Seeing as she apparently had no interest in talking to Stardust, Monarch summoned his resolve and replied. "She's more than meets the eye."
"I don't doubt it." Stardust said. "I don't suppose you'd ever let anyone else fly-"
"Never." He and Prez replied, interrupting Stardust at the same time.
Stardust chuckled. "Good to see that hasn't changed. Well listen, I just came by to make sure that you two weren't going to get yourselves hurt. Do you think you've got things handled from here?"
"Don't worry Stardust, I'll put my tools down if I start feeling dizzy." Prez reassured him.
Monarch tensed up once Stardust looked at him, but eventually found his words. "I won't push myself."
"Good." Stardust said, giving both of them a thumbs-up. "And uh, if either of you ever need anything, just let me know. The Dust knows you've done enough for us…"
"Don't sweat it Stardust." Prez said.
Monarch, however, had something to ask for. "If you find my wingmen-"
His voice failed him and his words trailed off, but Stardust was kind enough not to mention it. "If we find them, you'll be the first to know."
Monarch gave him a nod of gratitude, but could summon no words to reply. Before long, Stardust was gone, and it was just him and Robin again.
"Monarch…" She said, sensing his trepidation. "Wherever Peter and Eve are, there's nothing you can do for them right now, but they wouldn't want you worrying over them. You know that, right?"
He shakily nodded, but privately, he felt like there was more that he could be doing. If he were just a bit stronger, if he had flown that much better, he wouldn't have to deal with whatever mental affliction was plaguing him now, and he could be out there, searching for-
He steadily felt his mind begin to drift, before Robin called him by his name and grabbed him by the shoulders. "Hey, are you okay?"
He shook his head, inadvertently dropping his clipboard as he stumbled from a sudden weakness in his legs. He probably would've fallen over outright had Robin not been there to catch him. Tears welled up in his eyes as all manner of terrible thoughts hit him with the force of a tidal wave. Threatening to overwhelm what he had left, to sweep it away in a whirlpool of orange, then-
"Easy, easy, I'm here, it's okay." She said as she guided him down so that he was sitting on the ground. "Try to breathe, you can do this."
Even with her encouragement, calming down was… rough. His mind was a storm of doubts, self-loathing and beratement, terrible memories that it felt like he was reliving all over again. He wasn't sure how long it was that he sat there, sobbing to the point of coughing, but when it was over, Robin was still there beside him.
"I'm-" he tried to speak, but it was just too difficult. Between the soreness of his throat and the fears that he would lose himself again, he just couldn't do it.
Robin, however, understood what he was trying to say. "You are not okay. Take a moment to catch your breath, but I'm getting you back to bed."
He did as she commanded, moving with her as best as he could back to their room, and climbing into bed with all of the grace that he could manage. To say he felt pathetic would've been the understatement of a lifetime, he felt worthless, afraid, and scared. In spite of it all, he managed to coax out a single word, one that he felt that Robin deserved to hear. "Sorry."
"Don't be." She was quick to reassure him. "It's going to be okay, I promise. The others will find Peter and Eve, we'll get you a doctor, and we'll fix the Tomcat, together. Just… not today."
She sat there with him, whispering kind words to him until he drifted off into merciful sleep.
Authors Notes: Wrote this from 2-4 in the morning following an inexplicable burst of energy that shot me right out of bed, with Bronchitis, no less. If this isn't up to my usual standards, please let me know.