Revelations and Confessions
"Alright Granger, I hope you're ready for this. I have been working until my fingers bleed," Pansy shouted as she came through the Floo Tuesday evening.
Work had been a blur; she had entirely forgotten she had agreed to have Pansy and Theo over that night. Hermione came around the corner to find the witch and wizard in question. Pansy was holding a garment bag wearing a serious expression. Behind her, Theo smiled a lopsided grin holding two bottles of wine.
"You look like hell, what is the matter with you?" Pansy asked.
"Nothing let's just get this fitting over with," Hermione said tightly.
"Oh no, absolutely not Granger, you are going to tell me what is wrong this very minute," Pansy demanded.
"Drop it, Pans I am not in the mood," Hermione said more firmly.
Pansy tossed the garment bag and placed both hands on her hips and stared Hermione down.
"I know you saw the minister yesterday because it made the papers, and I also know you spent the afternoon with Draco. I doubt you would be this cagey about anything to do with the minister so spill. What happened with you and Draco?" Pansy said with a raised brow.
"Come now love, tell us, maybe we can help. I have been mates with Draco since nappies. Tell us what he did," Theo cooed.
Hermione exhaled sharply through her nose and because she knew they wouldn't give up.
"Nothing happened, we argued, nothing new about that! Nothing has been the same since we kissed."
"You. What?" they shrieked in unison.
Hermione's eyes widened in disbelief. How had she let it slip out?
"Tell me about that kiss now. I need details. When did this happen," Pansy demanded in a shrill tone.
Theo nodded wildly.
Hermione groaned, "It happened two days ago. It was a mistake. We just got so carried away at dinner—"
"You went on a date?!" Theo gasped, clasping his hands together in what appeared to be delight.
"Yes, he took me to dinner, it was not a date," Hermione insisted as Pansy rolled her eyes and Theo scoffed.
"Granger, he took you to a restaurant and the night ended with a kiss. It was a bloody date. Why is this a tragedy?" Pansy sneered.
"Because, actually enjoying being with him is accepting this arranged marriage. It's like admitting it's not terrible to force people together. I just can't," Hermione fumed.
They considered her for a moment before Theo responded.
"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard," Theo held up her hand as Hermione made to interrupt him, "you and Draco are actually similar, I am not even remotely surprised you get on. Allowing yourself to be happy does not make what the Ministry is doing any less terrible. As I'm sure you know, another round of letters went out yesterday following your meeting with Shacklebolt." Hemione nodded solemnly. He continued, "Finally, have you ever stopped to consider Draco's feelings? You are not only ruining your own happiness. While you don't know him very well, I do and will not allow your stupid pride to ruin his chance at happiness!" Theo warned, anger and determination flashing in his eyes.
Hermione had been all prepared to spit vitriol back at Theo but seeing her friend who never lost his temper speak with such conviction gave her pause. Had she considered Draco's feelings, or had she been so wrapped up in her own situation she had ignored him completely?
Hermione considered his actions over the last week. He had been kind and patient; sure he had teased but she gave as good as she got. Hermione sunk to her couch feeling a wave of guilt. He had made her feel seen and heard when so many others in her life had not. The more she turned over their interactions over the last week the more she saw how much she had ignored his little gestures. She had misinterpreted all of his behaviors and she knew she had done it on purpose. Hermione looked up at friends whose expressions, while still severe, softened as they noticed the tears in Hermione's eyes.
"You are right, Theo. I had only thought of myself. I treated him horribly yesterday. I need to see him," Hermione rose from her couch ready to go to him.
Pansy put her hands on Hermione's shoulders to stop her.
"Let him be," Pansy said firmly.
"What do you mean 'let him be?'" Hermione protested.
"She means," Theo said, "leave him be for now. Don't go barging over there in a right state. Nothing productive will come of it."
"Exactly. You busting down Draco's door to apologize is not the way to smooth things over. Send him a note and call on him tomorrow. Have a discussion. Most of all, pull your head out of your own ass Hermione Granger. If you can't see that Draco Malfoy is half in love with you already, I don't know how anyone thinks that you are brilliant," Pansy said in a scathing tone.
"Now Pansy, the witch is book smart, but I'm fairly certain she only has the sense of a mountain troll when it comes to any matter of the heart," Theo said dramatically.
"Really Theo, a mountain troll?" Hermione shrieked.
"Yes, are you deaf too?" Theo drawled.
Pansy snickered at both of them.
"Come on, let's get you into this dress. I need to make sure everything fits properly so I can put on all the final touches," Pansy said, changing the subject entirely.
Hermione just stared at both of her friends wondering if they were indeed right. They did know Draco better than she did, she conceded. Additionally, running off half cocked never served anyone well. She acquiesced to Pansy's request and began to unbutton her blouse slowly. Pansy huffed in irritation and suddenly vanished her clothing. Hermione shrieked, snapping her hands to cover her breasts. Thankfully Pansy had left her knickers.
"Are you barmy? Theo is standing here!" Hermione said incredulously.
"And Theo could not give a rat's behind about your tits. Honestly, Hermione, have you never met one of your best friends?" Pansy said in her signature bored drawl.
"It's true, you know. While you do have a spectacular pair of tits, I much prefer the solid chest of a man. Your fiancé, though, now that is a specimen. I always wished he would have been even the slightest bit interested in me," Theo said wistfully.
"Didn't you even try to give him a love potion once, Theodore Nott you horrible, horrible man?" Pansy teased, slapping him playfully on the shoulder.
Theo blushed and made some noncommittal noise in the back of his throat. Hermione's eyebrows rose to her hairline.
"Theodore Nott, are you telling me you tried to drug your own friend so he would sleep with you?" Hermione asked with a note of disgust.
"It was a huge mistake. I was right knackered and thankfully Blaise was able to Stupefy me and get Draco an antidote before anything untoward happened. I doubt any of them will ever let me live it down," Theo said thoroughly abashed.
"Nor should they. I'm not sure how to feel right now, Theo. I never would have taken you for somebody who would take advantage of their friend," Hermione said imperiously.
"Oh, come now Hermione, let's forgive Theo, it was only fourth year. He was a bit of a git back then and didn't really know how to flirt with anyone. Honestly, he was a right wallflower and a bit gangly if I'm being honest. Even if Draco had been into boys, he would have never stood a chance back then. Theo definitely wouldn't have been Draco's type," Pansy said with an air of superiority.
"And what is Draco's type?" Theo asked, "since you seem to be such an expert Pansy."
"Honestly probably Blaise, or—and just hear me out before you scoff—Harry and Draco would have made a lovely couple. Their pairing would have been a lot like Draco is with Hermione, very opposite seeming, but a lot more in common than either would like to admit," Pansy said confidently.
Theo rolled his eyes before harrumphing onto the sofa and summoning his glass of Chardonnay. Pansy had been busy, buttoning Hermione into the dress as she had chastised Theo, leaving Hermione to ponder on her statements. Hermione considered Harry and Draco as a couple. She was surprised she found herself agreeing with Pansy. They would've been a good pair had either of them have the slightest interest in their own sex; Hermione also agreed that Theo and Draco would not make a good pair. Despite the long-standing friendship between the two men, Theo was too agreeable. From the little Hermione had learned about Draco, he could never be with somebody who constantly agreed with him for very long.
Pansy conjured a mirror and gasped as she circled Hermione.
"My dress looks spectacular!" Pansy gasped.
"Hermione, darling, you look radiant. Since Pansy here is so vain, she can't even compliment the bride," Theo drawled as raised a brow at Pansy who looked nonplussed at the jab.
"I am not vain. I worked my ass off on the gown and I am rather proud of the outcome. It goes without saying Hermione looks lovely, that was never a question," Pansy said with a wave of her manicured hand as she began to slowly prod at the dress with her wand.
Hermione watched as the dress was magically cinched and pulled until it was perfectly sculpted to fit her body. It was a stunning gown, the base fabric was bone colored with an ivory lace overlay. The neckline was wide and lay just below her collarbone. The back buttoned along the length of her spine. The skirt fell away from her hips with a moderate train. Pansy demonstrated how with a simple charm the dress would transform for the party after the wedding. Hermione smiled and nodded but she heard nothing. She was transfixed by the woman in the mirror.
"Hermione," Theo said as he waved a hand in front of her face, "are you alright?"
"Yes of course," she answered too quickly.
"It's only that you have been crying as you stared unseeing for the last several minutes," Theo said gently as he turned her toward him to pull her into a hug.
Hermione hiccoughed as Theo held her.
"I'm sorry. I don't even know why I'm crying," Hermione said thickly.
"I wouldn't presume to know your feelings, but I know I would likely feel overwhelmed and confused. It is only natural to build feelings for a person you spend time with even if that person is not a person you choose for yourself. Then add getting married to a virtual stranger. The interesting thing about you and Draco is that intense feelings at one time existed even if they were negative ones. It serves to reason, then, you both only understand one another in extremes. As a result, maybe you are struggling to cope with the subtle ways you are drawn to him which is leading to the gross overreaction of emotion. He is not like you knew him. However, breaking down and rebuilding him in your mind is a lot to process and you are doing it while still running your company, planning a wedding, and trying to take down the Ministry. Being overwhelmed with emotion is natural and I for one am glad the Golden Girl is human enough to crack sometimes," Theo said kindly as he held her.
Hermione pushed out of his embrace enough to be able to see his face. Quietly brilliant Theo, never ceased to surprise her. He often leaned into his catty side and tended to wallow in over dramatics but then there were moments like these when he was sincere and speaking from the heart that took her breath away. As she held the deep blue eyes of her dark-haired friend she smiled.
"Alright if you two are quite finished," Pansy said interrupting the moment.
Hermione could see that her friend was really just blustering to cover her own soft heart. That was something Hermione had been surprised, and not so surprised as it made sense, to learn about Pansy. The girl and the woman she was now loved deeply and truly. Once Pansy decided she would let you in, she loved you with the ferocity of a lioness, ironic for a snake but true nonetheless. Hermione looked at both her friends and considered all the ways she had dismantled who she believed them to be and began to build the friendships she now treasured. It had taken time to be sure, but she had never fought these friendships so hard as she was fighting against Draco.
Were her objections really so petty, that she was allowing the actions of the Ministry to prevent her from forming a relationship with the man? That was not something she could abide. Hermione reminded herself she was the master of her own feelings, not the Ministry. If she wanted to let Draco Malfoy in it was because she wanted to be his friend not because she was being forced to. The Ministry had not required them to form an attachment; they didn't care if the couples liked each other. Hermione chastised herself for succumbing to such self-pity. Draco Malfoy was not the same person, and yes grappling with that was overwhelming, but she wanted to because she had a growing feeling, he was someone worth fighting for.
"Yes, I believe we are," Hermione said with resolve, "Pansy, you have outdone yourself this gown is stunning. Thank you for your hard work. I could never have imagined a more perfect dress."
"Of course, you couldn't, all of your fashion sense came from me," Pansy sneered, then flashed her a cheeky smile.
"Alright I want wine and take out, are we done playing dress up," Theo whined.
The over dramatics were back, and they even slowly devolved into giggles and far too much wine for a Tuesday evening. The one moral victory Hermione claimed was even bollocksed, she managed to withhold the story of the kiss much to the chagrin of her meddling friends.
She did remember to pen a note to Draco as well though as she drifted off to sleep, she couldn't say what she had managed to convey in that note. Smashing success Hermione, sending drunk messages via owl. She would likely be filled with regret come morning but there was nothing for it; he likely had it already.
Draco was having his morning tea reading the papers Tuesday morning. Their plan was working, the public was starting to get more restless with the announcement of more arranged marriages. Reporters were getting bold, the most recent articles in the Prophet were as close as Draco had ever seen to outright opposition of the Ministry. Shacklebolt had a PR nightmare on his hands already and Draco was ready to, what was that Muggle expression oh yes, add pour gas on the fire. He had owled his mother and asked her to meet him this morning to discuss the charity gala he wanted to hold for the children. Draco didn't plan to give her the full story because he wanted to keep culpability limited to himself and Hermione. He had owled the other members of the Board of Governors as McGonagall had recommended, and he had received a prompt request for a formal meeting to discuss this request. Draco couldn't say he was surprised given his family's history, but he was not looking forward to it nonetheless. He had been surprised when they had offered the next day. He had thought it would take weeks to get the board together.
The roar of the Floo alerted Draco to his mother's arrival. He rose from the chair in his study and made his way downstairs.
"Good morning mother," Draco said as he greeted his mother with a small kiss to her cheek.
"Good morning darling," Narcissa said warmly, "now fill me in. Your letter mentioned your desire to host a gala for a scholarship fund to benefit Muggle born students, but what prompted this?"
"I am marrying a Muggle born witch. I would think the reason would be obvious," Draco said.
"Yes of course that is all the public will suspect but what is the real angle?" Narcissa probed.
Damn this woman.
"Nothing more—"
"Draco Malfoy, I am your mother, if you think you can lie to me, I will remind you I taught you everything you know about putting on a public face," Narcissa said as the petite woman seemed to somehow loom over his six-foot frame.
"Shall we sit then," Draco said, gesturing to the tea service laid out in his living room.
Once seated and tea had been poured, Draco launched into his tale.
"The Minister was made aware that the upcoming Hogwarts classes are going to have at least double the number of Muggleborn students than any previous year. The wizarding world is hardly in danger of becoming extinct. Rather, Pureblood and Half-blood witch and wizard numbers are going to be dwarfed by up-and-coming Muggleborn generations. If I had to speculate, I would wager there are many older witches and wizards, our Minister included, who are concerned about the changing political landscape with the addition of more and more Muggleborns," Draco said.
Narcissa looked nonplussed to the average onlooker, but Draco knew his mother well, her prolonged silence at this news spoke to her level of shock.
"I think a gala is a spectacular idea my darling boy, I am happy to arrange everything, Hermione may be as involved as she wishes. I would of course be delighted to have her work with me on the project as I assume she doesn't have much in the way of experience in planning high society events. I am certain though with her brilliance and organizational skills she will be a quick study," Narcissa said genteelly.
Draco and his mother shared a feline smile.
"I will ask Hermione of course if she would like to join you in the planning, it only—I don't really know—" Draco dropped the sentence short.
Narcissa set her tea down and clasped Draco's hand.
"My dragon, you knew this wouldn't be easy, I am sure she is just trying to grapple with her own feelings. She will come around I am sure," Narcissa said soothingly.
"That's just it," Draco said, pulling his hand from hers, "one minute she is acting as though we are friends and the next, she is flirting with me, I kiss her, and then she gives me the coldest of shoulders. I feel like I have been jerked about so much that my entire body is bruised and battered," Draco said forcefully.
Narcissa regarded her son for a moment before answering. This had always infuriated him as a child and apparently still did. She was going to think of a perfectly logical answer when all he really wanted was someone he could rage with for a moment. He knew he should have just consulted Blaise, but he would be apt to talk with his wife who would inevitably talk to Hermione.
"You kissed her?" Narcissa asked with a raised brow.
Draco mental reviewed what he had said. Fuck. He had said that bit out loud.
"Yes, mother I did, I took her on a date and I kissed her at the end of it. We were in Muggle London, not a reporter in sight so I figured that meant more than nothing to her," he said angrily, then a bit more softly he said, "it did to me."
"Now I am more convinced than ever she is just a young woman in panic about the situation she finds herself in. This entire situation is about to come to its grand finale, you just need to be patient a bit longer. She is a brilliant woman; she will figure it out and if nothing else I believe Pansy is going to her house tonight for a dress fitting. She will talk sense into her I am sure," Narcissa assured him.
Draco was not entirely convinced but he had always trusted his mother's word and she had never given him cause to doubt it.
"A final question I dared not ask Ms. Granger as she did not willingly offer it. Are her parents aware and coming to the wedding?" Narcissa asked cautiously.
Draco had wondered the same thing and had not asked. He didn't know how. He knew they weren't dead; he had been sent to their house to kill them and they were gone.
"She has not told me either and like you I did not ask. It didn't feel like my place, but we are less than a week from the wedding and at this point I feel like I need to ask," Draco said.
"Just proceed with care and kindness, if she hasn't told you, it is likely a very sensitive subject," Narcissa offered as a response.
It wasn't very helpful as Draco had already surmised that for himself. He didn't wish to speak on the subject anymore though and wanted to return to plans for the gala. Draco changed the subject and his mother shifted with him seamlessly. Ever the society wife, able to put away unpleasantness and move on to more palatable conversation. For once Draco was grateful.
Draco was relaxing with a novel that evening after spending most of the day preparing for his meeting with the Wizengamot. He wanted to go to this meeting with a preliminary plan in place to ensure he didn't raise suspicions about his motives. A tap on his window drug his attention from his novel at half ten. He rose from the deep armchair in his study he favored for reading and went to the window to allow the owl in. The small brown and white speckled creature hopped up and down excitedly on his window ledge occasionally thrusting its leg with the note out. Draco chuckled at this small dancing owl.
"Alright, alright, stop dancing about so I can get my note you wild creature," Draco scolded.
The owl hooted softly and stilled holding out its leg. Draco untied the scroll and offered the owl a treat, which was hastily accepted. The creature stood there for a few more moments before Draco encouraged it to go home. Should he need to reply he would send Felix. The scroll was unmarked and poorly rolled. He was surprised it had made it to him at all given then it was loosely tied at best. Draco unrolled the scrap of parchment and found the most unintelligible note he had received in his life.
Draco,
This is Hermione, I have decided I need to apologize for acting like a proper git for the last week you have been mostly kind sometimes still an arrogant prick with stupid perfect blonde hair I want to touch all the time but overall nice I wondered if you would have me over so I might apologize in person. I will be free any time after five.
Most ardently
Hermione
Draco read the messy scrawl twice more and his smile grew each time. He was fairly certain this was written under the influence of alcohol. It was just one long stream of consciousness except the last sentence which felt more like it was an afterthought. He would indeed reply, and it would be on the back of this note so she might get to enjoy this delight for herself.
Hermione,
I would be delighted to entertain you at half six. Dinner will be served promptly at seven. I would be happy to wear a hat to cover the offending hair if you so desire. The arrogance I am afraid may be a permanent fixture at this point, what with being dashingly good looking and sinfully rich.
-D
Thusly finished, he sealed the letter with his signet and smiled to himself. He would send it first thing in the morning as he was certain she was likely asleep or, rather, passed out at this point.